Chapter Sixty-Four: The Goblin’s Knee

Chapter Sixty-Four: The Goblin's Knee

Saturday, 20 March 1999

Severus looked around, his eyes adjusting to the dim light of the small restaurant. When he had written and told her that he couldn't meet for tea, but that he was available in the evening and would like to meet and talk someplace quiet, Hermione had suggested the Goblin's Knee in Diagon Alley. He hadn't been there before, and to his eyes, it resembled a cave more than a restaurant. A pale hand waved at him, and Severus saw Hermione sitting at a small round table in a sunken area shaped like a flower, each petal containing one small table and two chairs. In the sunken flower's centre, a fountain burbled away, coloured lights at the bottom of the pool lighting up the water.

Severus crossed the front section of the restaurant, then stepped down three dimly glowing stairs.

"Good evening, Hermione."

Hermione smiled. "Hi, Severus! I'm glad you could meet me here."

Severus pulled out his chair and sat down. He felt acutely uncomfortable. The Goblin's Knee had a reputation as a meeting spot for lovers, and if the lighting were any indication, it was romantic. The table was surrounded on three sides by glowing stones of various sizes and colours, and the tabletop was inset with similar stones. Personally, although Severus understood and appreciated mood lighting, he preferred sufficient illumination to see the food he was eating...and sufficient to notice anyone sneaking up, wand drawn. He had, after all, promised the Headmistress that he would be cautious.

"It was good to hear from you this morning," Severus said. "I was slightly surprised, however."

"I really was sorry I had already accepted a date with Tarrant yesterday," Hermione said. "And I didn't think our conversation in the pub went well."

Severus raised an eyebrow, though he wondered if some of his more subtle gestures weren't lost in the ambience of the grotto-like restaurant. "I found your insinuation . . . atypical of you."

Hermione was saved from having to answer when a wait-witch came up to take their drinks orders. Severus ordered sparkling water with lime and Hermione ordered Campari and soda with a twist.

"I was surprised when Ginny wrote and told me she was quitting Quidditch. I had always believed she loved it." Hermione sighed. "I reread her letter when I got home last night. She didn't actually say you advised her to quit. Just that she got the idea from talking with you. And she seemed happy with her decision."

"Good. She has been unhappy, as you have pointed out to me."

"She said you talked to her for a long time."

Severus shrugged. "A while. She talked. I allowed her to speak."

Hermione laughed. "That is so you, Severus. I allowed her to speak." She laughed again.

Severus smiled. "She needed to have someone listen to her. I know what that is like. I have learned that sometimes just being able to talk to someone can be good. My friends taught me that, Hermione, including you."

Their drinks arrived, and they ordered appetisers.

Hermione sipped her Campari soda. "I went to see Mr Weasley this morning."

"Really? I don't know as I would have advised that . . . did he let you in?"

"He didn't want to. We stood and talked outside the front door for more than a half an hour before he realised I wasn't going away." Hermione shook her head and shuddered. "I see what you meant about how he was doing. It was a shock to see the place. I immediately started in cleaning, and he kept objecting, then he sat down and . . ." Hermione blinked back tears. "It was very sad. I stayed for the day, made a dent in the mess. At least I'm no longer afraid Arthur will get food poisoning or something when he eats there. I fixed him a good meal before I left, and tomorrow, I plan to put up some meals he can reheat over the next few days. Just a few simple things, since I'm not much of a cook, but they should keep him going."

"I was going to speak with Bill about getting him help in, perhaps a free house-elf once a week or so."

"He clearly needs help taking care of himself, but I've got it in hand now. I'm going back tomorrow and bringing a Gamp house-elf. A little blue fellow named Brue. I Apparated to the Gamp estate as soon as I left there and spoke in confidence with Madam Gamp. She taught Arthur and has a soft spot for him, I think. Brue is looking forward to helping."

"Madam Gamp isn't home? In Hogsmeade, I mean."

"No. Since Rosemary's father is getting over pneumonia, Healer O'Donald can only pop over occasionally to see her, and Alroy's mother is dead, so Madam Gamp is helping Rosemary get ready for the baby. I also think it's good for her. She's been . . . a little depressed lately. More so than usual. Being at the Gamp estate, where she grew up, and helping to get ready for the birth of her great-great-nephew, is good for her. She seemed happier when I saw her today, I think."

Severus nodded. "Good." He looked away. It was his fault that she was the way she was, that she was depressed. He had done it to her.

Hermione reached across the table and took his hand. "She misses the island, Severus. And her husband, and so many things. It's not just what you did, if that's what you're thinking."

"I am certain that is the primary cause of her pain," Severus said. He sighed, but squeezed her hand. "Why doesn't she just visit the island for a while?"

Hermione shook her head. "It's not allowed. Well, not strictly forbidden, of course, but . . . she said she can't go back to the island just yet, and Professor Dumbledore and the Headmistress have asked her not to visit without someone with her. I think they want to keep an eye on her if she does visit. I don't know exactly why, but Gareth said something . . . I don't know. I think that when she was isolated on the island, she developed . . . delusions or hallucinations or something. I may have got it wrong. But I think that they're afraid that if she returns, she might do something . . . Gareth said something about not wanting her to disappear." Hermione shrugged. "I don't know what it was. But it's probably to help her avoid the temptation to isolate herself again."

"I see. It was good of her to loan you a house-elf," Severus said, changing the subject.

"Well, she suggested Brue, and Brue was enthusiastic. He's somewhat younger than Gluffy and rather shy, but he loves domestic work and is looking forward to helping Mr Weasley."

"Going to try to pay him?" Severus asked with a smirk. "Or maybe just tempt him with a woolly hat?"

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I know that only Madam Gamp can free any of the Gamp elves, since she's the head of the family. And no, I did not even consider paying him, although I found out what his favourite sweet is, and I'll have that on hand for him, then I'm sending a case of butterbeer home with him to share with the other Gamp elves."

"I don't know why I should be curious, but what is his favourite sweet?"

"These sort of mocha-flavoured meringues." From under her chair, she picked up a box tied with string. "Madam Gamp told me where I could get them in Diagon Alley, so I picked them up on my way here. I tried one. They kind of melt in your mouth. I think I'd prefer a different flavour, but Brue likes mocha." She untied the box and handed Severus one of the confections before she put it back under her chair.

"I doubt the proprietors appreciate patrons bringing their own food with them," Severus said, but he took a bite. Not bad. Unlike soft meringue, which Severus found unpalatable, these sweets were baked hard, and Hermione was correct: they melted in your mouth. And he liked mocha. "Where did you get these?"

"The Café Orpheus," Hermione said. She giggled. "They promise 'poetry in pastry.'"

Severus smirked.

The appetisers they had ordered arrived, and Severus watched Hermione try a grilled stuffed mushroom.

"It's good. You should try one, Severus."

He had eaten at Hogwarts, but he speared one of the smaller mushrooms and popped it in his mouth. It seemed to burst with herbs and tangy cheese. He nodded. It was good.

"How have you been? It was nice to see you out last night. Did you have a good time?"

"Fine. Socialising with colleagues is of positive value," Severus acknowledged.

"It looked as though everyone was having a good time. Professor Flitwick seemed . . . happy."

"Oh, he was, very happy, especially once Rosmerta got the musicians to play," Severus said with a smirk. "Some friendly advice, Hermione: avoid the Fwooper's Song. I do not know what is in them, but they are powerful. Flitwick usually holds his liquor quite well, and these made him very . . . 'happy.'"

Hermione laughed. "I will remember that." She ate a small spear of white asparagus wrapped in smoky ham. "I ran into Helena Benetti when I was leaving with Tarrant. Did she meet up with you?"

"Not with me specifically," Severus said, beating back the blush in his cheeks, and glad now for the low lighting. "But she joined us for a few minutes." Deciding that stopping there would be tantamount to lying to Hermione, he added, "I walked her home."

"She has a cute little place...did you get to see it? She has some interesting things."

"You've been there?"

"She's agreed to supervise some of my Animagus exercises," Hermione explained. "Alroy can't always be there, and the only other Animagus nearby that I know of is Headmistress McGonagall. I don't think she'd have the time. So Alroy asked Helena. Now that his son's on the way, Alroy's time will be limited for a while. I'm lucky that Helena agreed to help."

Helena was only a few years older than Hermione. "She is very young," Severus began.

"She's been an Animagus for almost six years. And I'm not doing any of the more advanced exercises yet. She's like a tutor. Alroy's still in charge of my training."

"What about the Headmaster? Professor Dumbledore, I mean."

"Oh, well, yes, he's an Animagus. Harry told me how he saved him. But I think he'd be pretty busy, too, and I like Helena. She's already agreed. I can't change now."

"Have you decided what you are doing for the summer?"

"Yes, I'm continuing my Animagus training." Hermione sighed. "I'd like to do everything, but since I can't, it makes sense to finish my Animagus training then pick up some courses at university when I'm finished. I'll have plenty of time then, and be closer to finishing my apprenticeship, too. That's getting more difficult. I'll be glad for the Easter break."

"Are you going anywhere?"

"I'll be at my parents'. I may spend some time with Ginny and her dad, though. They're taking a trip, leaving this Thursday morning, but they'll be back by the weekend after Easter. Fred, George, Ron, and Charlie are going to be joining them at different points, and Arthur said that they'll all be together for dinner on Easter Sunday. They're doing Indian, in India."

"Good, I am glad that Weasley took my advice."

"Are you going to take a holiday, Severus?"

"I will be at Hogwarts," he replied.

"Maybe we could get together sometime during the week," Hermione suggested.

"I would enjoy that." Severus gestured toward Hermione's near-empty glass. "Would you care for another?" He looked around. "If not, perhaps we could go somewhere else. Take a walk. I wanted to talk to you about something."

"What would you like to talk about?"

"I would prefer somewhere more private," Severus said.

"More private than this?" Hermione asked. "Well, all right. No, I don't really want another drink."

Severus paid for them, and the two left the restaurant, climbing the stairs back up to street level.

"Where would you like to go? We could go back to Hogsmeade, to the house. Madam Gamp is at the estate and Gareth is out again. He said he wouldn't be back until late, maybe not until morning if he doesn't feel up to Apparating tonight. We'd have the place to ourselves."

"What about the house-elf?" Severus asked.

"He's always with Madam Gamp, although sometimes he goes to the Gamp estate without her. One of his sisters is sickly, I think. The house is empty tonight."

"All right," Severus agreed.

"Meet you at the gate," Hermione said.

The two Apparated back to the house, and Hermione used the passphrase and her key to open the door. The house wasn't completely dark. There was a faint light coming from the kitchen and another from the sitting room. Hermione flicked her wand, lighting the overhead lamp in the hall.

"We keep two small lamps lit downstairs. They're charmed to light when it begins to get dark," Hermione said. "It makes it more comfortable in the house."

Severus nodded. They had attacked Professor Gamp after dark. She had run down the dark staircase, then down the darkened hallway to the back door. She couldn't open it in time. Severus swallowed and shivered.

Hermione lit more lamps as they entered the sitting room. "May I take your cloak?"

Severus shook his head and draped his cloak over the back of a chair.

"Would you like something to drink? Tea, coffee, a beer? I'm sure Gareth wouldn't mind if we had some of his beer. There's plenty."

"All right," Severus said. "A beer." He sat down at one end of the couch.

Hermione left and returned a moment later, two glasses, one bottle of beer, and an Irn-bru. "Forgot to mention that I picked up Irn-bru the last time I was Muggle shopping. Madam Gamp enjoys it. Want one instead of the beer?"

Severus shook his head.

Hermione poured his beer into his glass, then poured her drink into her own and sat down at the other end of the sofa.

"What did you want to talk about?" Hermione asked.

"It's awkward," Severus said, "so I'll just begin by asking whether you and Tarrant are dating seriously."

Hermione raised her eyebrows. "That's blunt."

"Yes. But I'd like to know, and thought asking the most expeditious way of finding out. If you believe it's none of my business..."

"We aren't serious. I'm not, and I don't think Tarrant's had time to become serious. It's just fun to have someone to go out and do things with, you know?"

"Of course." Severus cleared his mind and calmed his blush. "You see, I ask because . . . I care about you, Hermione. I want what's best for you. If you were in love with him..."

"No, I'm not in love with him, Severus. Naturally, I do like him, or I wouldn't go out with him."

Severus nodded, confused by the lack of relief he felt at her answer. "Because, you see, I think that I . . . I . . . I don't know exactly how to say this."

"Are you regretting not having our second date?" Hermione asked.

"Not precisely. No. I think we both needed time, you know . . . and that first date was a surprise to us, or at least to me, but I just want you to know that I wish I . . . I just wonder . . ."

"You aren't usually at a loss for words, Severus."

He took a breath, paused, and began again. "You know that I care about you. I do, very much. You are very special to me, Hermione." He took in another breath and let it out slowly, looking at Hermione and thinking how lovely she looked that night. She was wearing a short necklace of pearls, a soft, deep red blouse, and a pretty long grey skirt, a wide black belt at the middle, and her hair was pulled up in clips at the sides of her head. Her lips were rosy, and her skin seemed flawless. "And you know that you're attractive to me, as well, that I find you . . . very attractive."

Hermione blushed and looked down at her hands. When she glanced back up, her eyes met Severus's. He slid closer to her and reached out tentatively, gently touching the side of her face.

"You have been wonderful to me, Hermione," he whispered, and then, deciding that he could not find the right words to say, he bent and kissed her lips. He kissed her again, and she returned his kiss. Sliding closer, Severus put one arm around Hermione and his other hand on her knee. She brought one hand to his side and another to his head as he continued kissing her, sucking her lower lip, then opening his mouth and deepening the kiss. Hermione responded, and Severus pulled her toward him.

He slid his hand beneath her skirt and squeezed her thigh. Her bare skin was soft to his touch, and Severus pushed Hermione back against the arm of the sofa, bringing himself to rest against her. He began to fondle one of her breasts through her blouse as he reached further up her skirt, his fingertips just touching the edge of her knickers at the top of her thigh. She shivered at his touch.

"Oh, Hermione," he moaned as he kissed her throat and began to unbutton her blouse, wanting to get closer to her soft, sweet skin, to show her his desire and to bring her some pleasure. She was so lovely, so warm.

"Mm, wait, wait, wait...I said wait, Severus!" Hermione pushed up on one of his shoulders impatiently.

Severus sat up, cheeks flushed and breathing heavily. He blinked. "Hermione?"

"This is just...too much, too fast," Hermione said, sitting up straighter and pulling her skirt down. She rebuttoned the two buttons Severus had managed to unbutton. "I thought we were just going to talk."

"I wanted to show you how I feel," Severus began.

"Just tell me, Severus. A couple weeks ago, you said you couldn't date me. Has that changed?"

"I think . . . I think maybe we should try. See what happens. We could see how we feel about each other, what kind of relationship we could have."

"Severus . . . I care for you. I do. And . . ." Hermione let out a breath. "I've been very attracted to you. But you've gone from being a friend to wanting to date to not wanting to date to . . . to . . . I don't know. Wanting to jump into whatever you were jumping into just now."

"Don't you want to jump with me, Hermione?" Severus asked softly. "I don't want to hurt you, but perhaps we could see how things might be between us."

"Trial dating or something like that?"

Severus shrugged one shoulder. "Something like that."

"All dating is like a trial period in a way, Severus. At least at the beginning," Hermione said. She sighed. "And I would have liked to have been aware that you wanted to try dating again before, um, well, before you started groping me."

Severus blushed. Groping her? "I thought that . . . if I showed you how I felt . . ."

"Yes, and you certainly did show me that you're attracted to me," Hermione said.

"You said you were attracted to me, too."

"Yes, but that doesn't mean we have to jump into anything physical like that."

"You seemed to like it." Severus was beginning to feel like a dirty old masher. He'd just wanted to touch her, get closer, kiss her, caress her, bring her a little pleasure, show her how he felt about her, give their relationship a chance, not dive into a full physical relationship that very moment on Gertrude Gamp's sofa.

"Of course," Hermione said. "Kissing was very nice. And I like being close to you, but..."

"But? But what?" Severus was angry now. He did know enough to stop when asked, after all...even if that had been what he'd been after that evening, which it hadn't been. Whatever he was or ever had been, he didn't force himself on women. He may have been coercive at times when he was younger and had provided payment or potions in exchange for sex, but never had he forced himself on an unwilling woman, even ones who he had thought were no better than whores, and he certainly would never force himself upon Hermione. "It's not as though I was going to start fucking you right here and now."

Hermione winced at his words. "I didn't suggest you were," she said softly.

"Sorry." Severus didn't know why he was apologising. She was the one who had insulted him.

"I just mean that we should talk about this, or ease into things gradually. It's very confusing to have you ask me out...on a date with some ups and downs...but you seemed happy to have asked me out, you gave me a very sweet kiss, we set another date, and then after all that, you told me you can't date me, you just want to continue our friendship. It hurt, but I agreed. I didn't understand, but I agreed. And now, tonight, you don't even bother with asking me on a date, you just start acting as though we're . . . we're already hot and heavy. Not a moment of . . . of romance."

"Well, what was the Goblin's Knee? That was your choice, Hermione. And it's romantic. That seemed a message to me. And then inviting me back here after I'd only suggested a walk." It was hardly as though they were strangers to each other, either, he thought. They didn't need to go through the entire getting-to-know-each-other phase that new acquaintances would.

"You said in your owl that you wanted to talk. The Goblin's Knee can be a good place to talk without being overheard, but then you said that you wanted someplace more private, so I brought you back here," she said. "I didn't mean any of it as an invitation to start feeling my breasts."

"I'm sorry I'm so offensive to you," Severus said, standing up, his jaw tight. "I'd thought you would enjoy that, too. But clearly my touch repulses you."

"You know that's not what I meant! I do find you attractive, Severus, but if we date, I can't rush into the physical side of things with you." Hermione's expression drew down sadly, her eyebrows pinched. "I think it would be a mistake. You could change your mind again about being with me, and then where would I be? Where would we be?"

Severus shook his head. He could see her point now, but he still felt as though she had behaved as though he were some kind of randy, out-of-control teenager. She could have indicated that she wanted him to slow down without acting as though she couldn't bear his touch. Helena had, and she had more right to protest than Hermione had...he and Helena scarcely knew each other, and he'd been grinding his erection against her.

"I see this was a bad idea...a truly bad idea," Severus said, turning away. He had wanted to give this relationship a chance before attempting anything more with Poppy. He had believed he owed it to Hermione to try, or at least to his idea of Hermione. "You have meant so much to me, Hermione, and your friendship's been so important to me. Given me hope . . . and I just . . ."

"I know, and I do know that you care about me, but can you see why I'm confused? And even if we were to begin seeing each other romantically, I think it would be a good idea to take things slowly. It would be a good idea regardless of who you were, but the way things are with you now . . . you don't know what you want...or you didn't...and now I'm not sure, myself. You needed time, you said. But it's only been a couple weeks. Either something didn't change that you thought would, or something did change, or something didn't work out, or your feelings are different, or something, but my own life didn't come to an end when we decided to remain friends...when you decided we should remain friends. That might be for the best."

"Mm." She didn't want to date him any longer. She didn't like him touching her. She clearly wasn't ready for a romantic relationship with him. He felt his throat growing tight and heat rising behind his eyes. He blinked. "I had better go now."

Hermione stood. "You don't need to."

"We have had our discussion," he said tightly, unable to turn and face her. "I'd rather leave now. . . . Owl me and tell me how the Weasleys are faring."

"I will. When I know what my parents' plans are, I'll let you know, too. I thought . . . maybe you might come around to the place in Cornwall over the holiday."

Severus gave a short laugh. Come around to Cornwall, she says, as if nothing had happened. He wanted her continued friendship, but he wasn't sure whether he could manage the house in Cornwall just yet. "We'll see."

"I'm sorry, Severus."

He shook his head and turned toward her. "Turnabout is fair play, they say. I'll show myself out. Good night, Hermione." He paused. "I had a nice time at the Goblin's Knee."

"So did I."

Hermione slumped back onto the couch as Severus quickly grabbed his cloak and left the room.

~ End of Part Six ~

~ to be continued ~

NEXT

Chapter Sixty-Five: Test Flight

Sunday, 21 March 1999

Severus meets Helena to test fly the new Nimbus Victory.

Rated T.

Characters: Severus Snape, Poppy Pomfrey, Pomona Sprout, Helena Benetti

Upcoming Chapters in Part Seven

Subject to change.

Chapter Sixty-Six: Broomstick Rodeo

Characters: Severus Snape, Helena Benetti, Gareth McGonagall

Chapter Sixty-Seven: Some Muggle Business

Characters: Severus Snape, Gareth McGonagall, Harry Potter

Chapter Sixty-Eight: Bad Timing

Characters: Severus Snape, Poppy Pomfrey, Quin MacAirt

Chapter Sixty-Nine: Moulting

Characters: Severus Snape, Minerva McGonagall, Albus Dumbledore, Fawkes

Chapter Seventy: To Persist and Pursue

Characters: Severus Snape, Minerva McGonagall, Albus Dumbledore, Poppy Pomfrey others

Chapter Seventy-One: Descent into Hades

Characters: Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy Newman, Lucius Malfoy, Bellatrix Black Lestrange, Peter Pettigrew, others

Chapter Seventy-Two: Home

Characters: Severus Snape, Minerva McGonagall, Poppy Pomfrey

Chapter Seventy-Three: Renovation

Characters: Severus Snape, Gareth McGonagall, Hermione Granger, Gertrude Gamp

Chapter Seventy-Four: Glimpse of the Snape Family Past

Characters: Severus Snape, Gareth McGonagall

Chapter Seventy-Five: A Wizard Not to be Crossed

Characters: Severus Snape, Gareth McGonagall

Chapter Seventy-Six: Present Danger

Characters: Severus Snape, Minerva McGonagall, Alastor Moody, others