Chapter Forty-Four: No Unmixed Pleasures

Chapter Forty-Four: No Unmixed Pleasures

Wednesday, 10 March 1999

Severus woke to the most delightful sensation. He thought he was dreaming and tried to fall back to sleep to recapture the dream, but the sensation went on and on. Someone was kissing and teasing the head of his cock.

"Mmm, Poppy . . ." His hand found her head and he twined her hair through his fingers. She had let it down when they'd undressed for bed the night before.

"I'm glad you're awake. I didn't want to do more before knowing that you wanted me to continue."

"Please do . . ." He didn't open his eyes, relishing the sensation of Poppy's breasts rubbing against his body as she pleasured his cock, licking, sucking, and swallowing.

She stopped before he came, though, kissing her way back up his body.

"Good morning, Severus."

"It is," he said, opening his eyes and looking up at her face above him. He shouldn't think he might be able to get used to this. It was more than the one-time tryst, but it was just a fling. A brief fling. Not even an affair. "Kiss me."

Poppy kissed him, then kissed him again. "I know it's been a short night," she whispered, "but I thought we might have more time this way and at least one of us might make it to breakfast this morning."

"I don't care about breakfast," Severus said, embracing her and rolling her over onto her back.

He kissed her, sucking her lower lip, then kissed everywhere on her face that he could reach. He found her ear and kissed it, then remembered the sensation of Gareth's tongue in his ear. He licked her ear, then began to move the tip in and out. Poppy moaned and put her legs around him. Severus kissed her ear once more, then looked down into her face as he shifted his hips, seeking her crux with his cock, he reached down to guide himself in, but then he thought of Flitwick. He may not have those extra muscles, and he might not be able to do very much moving around once he was inside her, but he could still give her a little taste of that. Up and down, back and forth, and in circles, she'd said.

He took hold of his cock and pressed the head against her clit. She liked his tongue there. She might like this, too, Severus thought. He began to rub the head of his cock against her clitoris, up and down, back and forth. He was rewarded by gasps and moans as she grabbed his buttocks.

"Can you come like this, Poppy? I want to see you come, come for me, Poppy, come for me!"

It felt so good to rub against her like this. The sensation was marvellous. She was wet and soft. Watching her face, he kept rubbing and stroking himself against her, and she came, shuddering and shouting.

Poppy opened her eyes and looked up at him. "Are you sure that you are Severus Snape? The Severus Snape who had no experience with sex?"

He smirked at her. "I am a fast learner. Besides, it's easy with you. I see what brings you pleasure, and I do it. And I enjoy it very much. I rather liked that myself."

"But you still haven't come," Poppy said.

"You had a very intriguing idea last night."

"Which one?"

"The last one. If you want to do it."

"The last one . . . Ah, me over your face and pleasuring your cock," she said.

He nodded.

"You like that idea?"

"Very much. I never thought I'd like eating pussy, if you'll excuse me for saying that rather crudely, but I do love it with you. And the thought of having you doing the same to me...if you want to...whilst I'm doing that, it excites me." His cock twitched, emphasising his arousal.

"All right, we will try that. I'd like it. But if you don't like it, just push up on me, and I'll move," Poppy said.

Severus threw back the covers and lay down on his back. Poppy moved around to straddle his head then lower her mouth down onto his erection. She began to lick and flick the head of his cock as she stroked his shaft with one hand. Severus reached up and drew her down to him. The position felt odd to him, and slightly claustrophobic, but Poppy's tongue was pleasuring him, so he pulled her closer and found her clitoris with his tongue. Poppy closed her mouth around him and moaned. The vibration seemed to go right through to his balls, and he licked harder. She moaned as she licked and sucked, and then as she began to come, she sat up, holding onto his cock, shouting breathlessly.

As her orgasm began to subside, Poppy began to pleasure him again, but Severus pushed her up and said, "No, I don't want to come yet. Let's take a break."

Poppy moved off of him and lay beside him. She kissed his cheek. "You know, if you like, there's a spell I know that can help you last longer if you want to."

Severus paused, staring at the ceiling. "A spell?"

"Yes, if you like. It's not necessary. Whatever you want." She didn't understand the peculiar expression on his face.

"What kind of spell?"

"As I said, it just holds off orgasm for you, makes it so you don't have to work at holding back if you want to last longer."

"Does it hurt?"

"Hurt? It shouldn't hurt. I've never had it cast on me, since it's a spell for wizards, but I've never heard of it hurting. If it did, there'd be something wrong. It's easily cancelled." She put her fingertips to the side of his face and turned it towards her. "Severus, was there a reason you asked that?" she said softly.

He shook his head. "Just wondering."

"If you think it's unnatural or you don't want to do it for any other reason, that's fine. It was only a suggestion."

He nodded, looking away from her. This was Poppy. She cared about him. She wouldn't do it just for her pleasure, and she wouldn't do something that would hurt him just so that she could have more sex and find excitement in his pain. She hated to see him suffering, he knew that. He didn't know why her mention of a spell caused his stomach to clench so.

She raised up on one elbow and looked into his face. She caressed his cheek. "Severus, I suggested it only because you were trying to keep from coming just then. I thought you might like it. I can see that the suggestion disturbed you."

"No. I was just curious," he said flatly, his eyes closed.

Poppy kissed his cheek. "Severus love, did someone do something to hurt you? A spell that hurt you during sex?"

"I'm not very experienced, Poppy, that's all." She must think him completely foolish, he thought.

She caressed his face. "I would never suggest anything that I thought would hurt you, sweet Severus. Never. I think you know that."

"Of course." He opened his eyes. "You always took good care of me, even when I behaved like a complete bastard and didn't appreciate it. You were always very generous to me. I know you wouldn't hurt me."

"And that hasn't changed. I certainly wouldn't want to hurt you when we were making love. I would feel bad even if I did something accidentally." She kissed him softly.

"I know." Severus couldn't understand his reaction. He had just asked Gareth about sex spells the previous day. He should be happy that Poppy knew one and wanted to show him.

"I'm sorry if I offended you," Poppy said. "We've spoken freely about sex. I didn't think you would mind my mentioning it. I know that some wizards might find it . . . inappropriate that a witch suggest using spells or anything else. But you liked my other ideas."

"It's not that, Poppy," Severus said.

"Did someone hurt you? Did someone use a spell during sex and hurt you?" she asked, wondering if he had been sexually abused as a child. Is that why Severus was so angry at the world, why he had become a Death Eater? One of the reasons he had never had a normal adult sex life? "When you were young?" she asked.

"Poppy, I just . . ." He looked away from her.

"Don't be ashamed, Severus. It's not your fault if someone did something to you."

"It is," he said hoarsely.

"No..."

"Yes! Yes, it is. I let her," Severus said vehemently. "I let her and I hated it and I still came back. I did finally stop. I just couldn't do it any longer. But I let her. I should be ashamed. I am ashamed."

"No, you shouldn't be. You can talk to me about it if you want to."

He shook his head. "I was a Death Eater. I deserved everything that came with that."

"I'm so sorry, Severus," she said softly. "You didn't deserve it, though. No matter what."

"I thought it was normal. That it made me a tough, strong Death Eater. But it was awful. And it wasn't even normal amongst Death Eaters. Just her and her little circle." Severus swallowed and turned his face away. "I can understand if you want to leave. If having me touch you . . . if it seems foul now."

"Severus Snape, look at me," Poppy said, her finger gently on his jaw. "You are a strong, sexy, thoughtful, passionate lover. I feel excited when I'm with you, and I feel secure. I know you would never do anything to me against my will. I love to have you touch me. There is absolutely nothing foul about it."

He looked at her and sighed. "I don't really think about it anymore. I didn't. Not until recently. The last time it did more than cross my mind was a few years ago . . . just to think, though, how nice it was...how nice it would be...for someone to care about my pleasure and ask me what I'd like. Lately, though . . . I've thought of it, remembered it. It's partly because I've been feeling more sexual, but also because I've been facing more of my past."

"Did that witch use a spell that hurt you?" Poppy asked.

Severus nodded. "It was similar to the one you describe, but it was cast on the erection almost immediately, and the longer it was on, the more it . . . the more it hurt, but the erection wouldn't go down and there was no orgasm. When she lifted it, it would be a painful relief to ejaculate, but it didn't feel like a normal orgasm."

"Oh, Severus, that sounds awful! We don't have to use any spells at all. Sex with you is wonderful, and you certainly don't need to think you have to use one on my account."

"But I would like to, actually," Severus said, turning in bed slightly and looking at her. "Not that one, obviously, but I was thinking about it yesterday. I thought I'd do some research or ask someone." He reddened. "I didn't want to ask you, even though as a mediwitch, you might know some, or just from your own experience. I was thinking of you, of wanting to please you and still having pleasure myself."

"Let's just forget it for now," Poppy said. "If you want me to teach it to you sometime, though, or you have any other questions about things like that, just tell me." She gave him a kiss. "Even if it's weeks or months from now and you're with someone else."

"Do you want me to be with someone else?" Severus asked.

"No, but I'm being practical. I know this is . . . it is what it is. I wouldn't be surprised if you found some nice witch and started a relationship with her. You deserve it."

"Would you be jealous?"

"I have no right to be jealous, Severus. I would certainly think that any witch would be fortunate to have you as a lover, though that isn't everything in a relationship."

"But you might be a little jealous?" Severus asked.

Poppy laughed. "Severus, that is an unanswerable question." She kissed him. "Let's not think about that now."

"Then we'll have to find something else to do." He returned her kiss. "Would you find it insulting if I asked if I could look at you?"

"You have looked at me before, Severus."

"I mean . . . I liked coming out of the bathroom yesterday and seeing you in my bed. You were gorgeous and sexy. You looked like a goddess, and no god could be luckier than to find you in his bed. And . . . I . . . I liked looking at you last night in your office before I pleasured you. Seeing you . . . in your private places."

"Ah, I see. You find it arousing to look at me?" Poppy asked, a slight smile on her lips.

Severus licked his lips. "Very."

"Then look . . ." she said softly. "Look."

She rolled away from him and stretched out, lying partly on her side, one arm over her head. Severus sat up and looked at her, taking in her entire body, then pausing and looking at her breasts.

"I liked seeing you touch your breasts yesterday," he whispered.

Poppy began to brush one hand over her breast, watching his face as he focussed on her. She circled one nipple with the tip of her finger, and smiled when he licked his lips.

"May I . . . see . . . more?" he asked, looking at her crux.

She lay back, spreading her legs, bending her knees and bringing her feet together, then spreading her legs further as she pressed her thighs to the bed and drew her feet toward her.

Severus moved to kneel in front of her. He reached out with one hand and spread her labia, then he touched her clitoris. "This, this is so sensitive." He circled her entrance. "And here, I want this, to be in you, deep in you."

"I would like that, too," Poppy said softly.

He lay down on top of her, but did not move to enter her. He kissed her cheek, then he whispered in her ear, "If it's not too peculiar or private or insulting or wrong . . . I would like to look at you more."

"What do you mean?" Poppy asked.

"Your buttocks . . . and . . . your anus," Severus whispered.

It was at times like this when Poppy was completely certain that Severus really was inexperienced, but that he was also very curious.

"You certainly are curious, aren't you?" Poppy said, smiling up at him as he raised himself on one arm.

"I like to be thorough," he replied, a slight gleam in his eye. He caressed her cheek and his expression softened. "And you are so beautiful and sexy, I want to know every bit of you."

"Do you want me to roll over? Or I could just put a pillow under my hips. Then you could see everything at once."

"You are very kind to me," Severus said, moving off of her. "I know it must seem peculiar to you. I don't think most witches would be so patient."

"What else can I say to a man who tells me that I'm beautiful and sexy and he wants to know every bit of me?" Poppy replied with a laugh, putting a couple pillows under her hips.

Severus moved to sit in front of her. He looked at her vulva and her anus, then separated her buttocks for a better view.

"You are sexy everywhere. Even here," he said, touching her anus.

Severus remembered how good it had felt to put his cock into Gareth. From what Poppy had said, she didn't like having anything in her there. But maybe just a little touch. Not his cock, but his finger. She might not mind, and if she did, he would stop. And she might even enjoy it a little bit. He bent toward her and began to lick her clitoris. When he was certain that she was enjoying that, he began to rub his left index finger against her anus, still pleasuring her with his lips and tongue. He remembered how good it had felt when she had moaned when her mouth was around him, so he hummed against her. Poppy moaned and raised her hips. She was gasping and moaning, and she hadn't objected to having him rub her anus, so he began to slowly insert his finger into her as he continued to pleasure her with his tongue. She groaned, and Severus paused, but when she didn't say anything, he resumed.

"Oh, gods, Severus, so close, so close," Poppy gasped.

He sat back, withdrew his finger, then inserted it from another angle as he moved forward and guided his erection into her with his right hand. She moaned more loudly as his cock filled her. Severus moved his finger, and he could feel it against his cock through the wall of her vagina. It was awkward, though, and he removed his finger. He began to pump, raising and lowering his hips, bracing himself, rolling his hips with every thrust, rubbing against her clitoris, Poppy rocking beneath him, thrusting up to meet him as he drove into her.

Poppy began to come, just gasping, wordless, choking cries coming from her. Severus raised himself up on his hands, still pumping into her, watching her face. Then the sensation of his own building arousal overwhelmed all else, and it seemed to him that all he felt was his cock, and he closed his eyes, coming, shouting, almost howling, his orgasm exploding on him suddenly. With a low, long groan, he collapsed, his heart pounding hard in his chest.

Severus opened his eyes, then pushed off of Poppy and lay on his back beside her.

"How was it?" Severus asked as he caught his breath.

Poppy rolled over on her side and placed her hand on his chest, stretching out her legs and pushing the pillows aside. "It was marvellous, and I cannot imagine anything less from you."

"That's a lot to live up to," Severus said, rubbing his forehead.

"Are you all right?" Poppy asked. "Headache?"

Severus nodded.

Poppy moved to sit by his head and she began to rub his scalp, a bit of magic tingling through her fingertips.

"How does this feel?"

"Good," Severus replied.

She rubbed his head for several minutes until Severus sighed and said, "Much better."

He opened his eyes and touched her cheek lightly before dropping his hand. "We should dress," he said, "and I need a shower."

"Yes, and we should both try to be at breakfast," Poppy said with a sigh.

"That's the second time you've said something like that," Severus observed as he got out of bed. "We've presumably both been absent from breakfast at the same time before. I doubt that anyone will draw any conclusions if neither of us is there this morning. Although I am hungry."

"Minerva noticed yesterday. She drew conclusions because she knew you were going to see me the night before, and she was in the infirmary when I Flooed through looking less than freshly coiffed."

Severus, who had begun to open the wardrobe, stopped, frozen. "Minerva knows?" His voice cracked.

"She asked me. I initially told her that it was none of her business, but then it was obvious that she had figured it out, so I told her I'd spent the night."

Severus just stood there, staring unseeing into his wardrobe.

"Believe me, Severus, I was not pleased, but I saw no point in trying to lie about it."

"Why didn't you tell me? Are there others you've told?"

"No, only her. I told her it was just a . . . a one-time thing. I said it was something private between you and me. She won't tell anyone else. I wouldn't have said anything to her under any other circumstances."

"You should have told me," Severus said.

"I didn't really think to tell you. Besides, I know you value your privacy. But I didn't hide it from you. I just didn't think to say anything."

"Is she angry with me?"

"What? Why would she be angry with you? No, she's not angry with you."

"She probably wondered what you were doing with me, with such a . . . such an inexperienced wizard."

"I doubt it. I didn't go into any detail, but once Minerva was over her surprise, she asked if I had fun, and I said that you were wonderful and that I did have a lot of fun."

Severus didn't say anything. Minerva knew.

"You have to admit, Severus, it wasn't something predictable. It's not as though either of us had thought we might get together, even for one night. I certainly never would have thought you'd be attracted to me, of all people. I was pleased when you were, though."

Severus felt Poppy's gentle hands on his back.

"I'm sorry, Severus, I shouldn't have told you. It was thoughtless of me. I know her opinion is important to you."

He shook his head. "It can't be helped. She is very observant."

"Yes, and Minerva cares about you. She was also worried about you. I told her you and I are both adults, and she should know me well enough to know that I care about you. But she won't say anything to you, I'm sure, and it's all right."

"I don't care," he said, his voice tight.

"You do care, I can see that. I don't care to have her speculate about our involvement, either, even though she's probably my closest friend."

"And she didn't laugh or ask you whether you had lost your mind?"

"Of course not!"

"I, um, I think I will talk to her about it. Try to explain."

"You don't owe her an explanation. She's your friend and she's my friend...and she's the Headmistress...but you don't owe her an explanation."

"You told her I was good?"

"I did. I told her we'd both enjoyed it and that it was a good thing. I wouldn't have spent the night in your bed if that wasn't so."

"I don't want her to think you had bad sex with me and stayed because you felt sorry for me."

"She doesn't think that. I made it very clear that you were a wonderful lover."

"Was she surprised?"

"I don't know. I don't know that she would have been surprised. You are good at so much that you do. Why wouldn't you be a spectacular lover?"

Severus just shook his head. He couldn't tell Poppy about the Adfectus. Could he?

"Do you remember the September before Albus died...when we believed he died?" he asked tentatively. "Albus made Minerva sick and then she disappeared for a few days, and then I did?"

"Yes," Poppy said softly.

"We were together. Together, together. Minerva and I."

"You . . . you don't have to tell me this, Severus."

Severus froze. "You know."

"She told me the day after. But she just needed to talk to someone about her feelings. It had been emotionally difficult for her to make love with someone other than Albus."

"She wasn't going to tell anyone."

"It was about her, too, Severus. And that's what she talked about. Herself. Her feelings. To the extent that she mentioned you, she did so fondly. Minerva feels very protective toward you. That's why she was worried about you. We don't speak about the Adfectus, and I have never breathed a word to another soul...I haven't even talked to Albus about it, though he knows that I know."

"As long as it was you she talked to," Severus said softly. "I knew that she told Professor Gamp for her calculations, but she said she didn't tell Gareth. At the time, he hated me. She didn't think that it would improve his attitude toward me. And I thought she'd told Robbie, but Robbie was Albus, so she hadn't. But she didn't tell me that she told you."

"It was two different things. I'm sure that all she told Gertrude was that you had been hit by the Adfectus and that she was the object of your affections. With me, it was a personal conversation to help her to cope with all of the feelings she went through."

He nodded and turned around. "As long as it was you. I know it was hard for Minerva, but . . . I wonder now why you came down to see me."

"Because you flirted with me, Severus. You remember that. You kissed me before you left my rooms. You were very seductive. I may be a Hufflepuff, but I do have some nerve, you know. I felt attracted to you, and I wanted to know if you had really wanted to seduce me, so I came down here," Poppy said. "You were there. You know what happened. It had absolutely nothing to do with Minerva or the Adfectus. It was about us."

He nodded and stepped away. "I need a shower. I will see you later in the day."

"Severus? This has been good. I will feel awful if you have been hurt by it."

Gareth's words echoed in his head. Gareth had worried about hurting him, too. He stepped backward toward the bathroom.

"No. It's fine. It was just fucking. I need to shower." He saw her flinch at his words. "Don't worry about it. I mean that."

"Severus...I can't leave with you feeling like this."

"Poppy, I don't know how I feel. I am fucked up. I've been fucked up for a long time. You didn't do it to me. And you're right. It was good. We were good together. You don't want me hurt; I don't want you to feel bad, either. I may be fucked up, but I do know that. Don't feel bad, Poppy." He stepped back toward her and bent to kiss her cheek. "I will see you later."

"All right. I'll try to make it to breakfast, too."

Severus looked up over his coffee cup. Poppy had just walked in. She looked lovely. Had she always looked so lovely, and he had just been blind, he wondered. As he'd showered, he hadn't let himself think about his conversation with Poppy. He just felt the water run over him, washed his hair, scrubbed his body, and soaped up his genitals. He was a little sore. Sore from fucking one of the sexiest witches in Britain, he thought. He might be ugly, with a hook nose, bad teeth, and a mediocre body, but he got sore from fucking a sexy, desirable witch. And it was good sore, not bad sore. Good sore from good sex. Great sex.

He dried off, then used his wand to dry his hair. Gareth had shown that spell to him a few months before. The spell he had used to use had left his hair full of static, which hadn't mattered when he had been using Shed-Stop Potion on his hair.

He brushed his teeth and looked at his reflection. He did look better than he used to, he thought. A little added weight and a lot less mortal danger could do that for a wizard. He wondered about his hair. Gareth had said he should change the style. He wasn't sure about that. He should ask Poppy what she thought.

By the time he got to the Great Hall, Severus was feeling better. Minerva had seen him the previous day, after all. If she had wanted to ask him about what he'd done with Poppy, she could have set up a meeting with him. She hadn't. She had only said something about still working on the budgets. And he had talked to Gareth. He had told him that he had spent the night with Poppy. He had even told him about performing oral sex on her. That was far from discreet. But he'd wanted to brag to someone, and Gareth appreciated Poppy's sexiness. Severus knew that he would be impressed. Poppy hadn't volunteered to tell Minerva the way that he had gone out of his way to tell Gareth. He should probably tell Poppy that he had talked to someone, too, but he wouldn't say who it was. That would probably make her very uncomfortable.

As Poppy crossed the Great Hall, Severus tried to catch her eye, but she went and sat down at the other end of the table next to Pomona in her usual chair. He didn't worry about it. He would see her later in the day. She'd been looking very fresh and pretty, though, and it didn't appear that she was upset at all. He would have to see her and make sure that she was all right, that he hadn't offended her. And he could get some of that potion from her. The soreness would wear off by itself, but the potion would be nice. It would show her that they were back to normal. He hoped they were back to normal.

After his last class of the morning, Severus left immediately, warding the door behind him, rather than waiting as he usually did. He could grade the potions later. He stood in the entry hall outside the Great Hall and watched the students go in for lunch, glowering at any who were too unruly. He was waiting for Poppy, but he just acted as though he merely wanted to terrorise the students.

Poppy arrived, glanced at him and nodded, then went into the Great Hall. He waited a moment, looked disdainfully at the students entering with him, and they moved away from him. With his longer stride, he caught up to Poppy before she got to the staff table. If Albus could play musical chairs, so could he, Severus thought, following her to her seat and sitting to her left.

Poppy looked up at him, and he could see her puzzlement. They had said that everything would be the same between them in public. But there was nothing wrong with sitting next to her at lunch. They'd done it before. He was supposed to sit next to Minerva, but it seemed he rarely did these days, so no one would notice. Minerva might, but that didn't matter to him any longer.

Conversation was no different from usual, and he spoke little, but he brushed Poppy's arm with his several times as he ate. He wished he could think of something to say that would let her know that he was okay and that hoped she was, too, but he couldn't think of a thing. Finally, pudding arrived, and he got up from the table. He acted as though he was about to leave and then thought of something. He put his hand on the back of Poppy's chair and leaned over to talk to her. He said the only thing that occurred to him.

"You can have my dessert, Poppy."

She smiled and thanked him. His expression barely changed, but his eyes softened, and he nodded, then spun on his heel and strode off.

Double Potions with the sixth-year class would kill him, Severus was sure of it. It seemed that the afternoon was dragging, and by the time the sixth-years filed in, he didn't think that he could wait any longer to see Poppy. Instead of having them brew that day's potion, he escorted them to the library and left them there with an obscure assignment that would take them hours to complete. It would be good discipline for them. And there was an outside chance that it might help them on their NEWTs.

He walked into the infirmary. Poppy was with two students. Years of spying on a paranoid megalomaniac helped him keep from tearing his hair out by the roots. Instead, he calmly entered Poppy's office, picked up a journal on pediatric Healing, and sat down with it, doing a perfect imitation of a man engrossed in his reading. Fifteen minutes later, Poppy had finished with the students and sent them on their way.

"Severus," she said, shutting the door behind her, "don't you have a class now?"

"They are quite well occupied. I needed to see you and know that you were all right. I was . . . worried that I upset you."

"I'm fine. I was a little upset with the way you said it was just fucking, but I knew that you were uncomfortable and didn't know how to react. I took that into account. I'm fine now. And I appreciated your dessert. Now, hadn't you better get back to your class?" Poppy asked briskly.

"I . . . all right." Severus didn't know what else to say. He supposed that was all he had come for, to hear her say that she was fine, but he felt disappointed. "I have them doing research in the library, though. I had thought we could talk."

"I don't know that we have anything to talk about," she said, straightening a pile of parchments. "I am sorry I told you that Minerva talked to me about the Adfectus. You were about to tell me, and you were willing to make yourself vulnerable that way. I should have let you. I thought I was saving you from having to repeat something difficult, but I should have let you. I don't know that there's anything more to say."

"I had wanted you to understand why it upset me that Minerva knew. It wasn't your fault that she did. She notices things, and she's able to add things up. I understood that. I wanted to tell you about the Adfectus, explain it to you, try to explain why Minerva is important to me. When you said you already knew, I couldn't do that any longer. And then it made me wonder why you came down to see me. I know what happened between us, and I trust that, but for a moment, I worried. I wasn't myself during the Adfectus. I am not experienced. I told you that. But under the Adfectus, my emotions were so close to the surface." He shook his head. "I don't think I can explain it. I was upset that Minerva knew what happened between you and me because it was private, but also because of my feelings for her. And, as embarrassing as it is to admit, I was pathetic when I was with her. She was kind, and I doubt she would tell you I was pathetic, but I was. I was generally pathetic and I was a pathetic lover. I knew the situation was difficult for her. I tried to make it easier. I asked her what she liked, what I could do for her, but I was inept. And even if I hadn't been inept, the situation was abnormal. She could have told you what a bad lover I was, if not when she told you about the Adfectus, then yesterday when she talked to you. I don't know precisely what difference I thought it would make between us. I couldn't process it. I didn't know what to say. I tried not to say too much, but even then, I managed to hurt you. I am sorry."

"That's all right. I've known you a long time. I know your moods, even if you are more relaxed than you were when you were a spy. And with me these last few days, you've been very . . . sweet, actually. I was touched. So to hear you say it was 'just fucking' in the way that you did bothered me. I got over it. Otherwise, you were fine. Obviously surprised, but not unkind." Poppy shrugged. "For what it's worth, Minerva didn't say you were pathetic in any way. At the time, she told me that you were good to her. I had been a little concerned because, to be honest, you could sometimes be unpleasant. More than unpleasant. When she told me about the Adfectus, she reassured me that you had treated her well. Yesterday, I told her that you were a wonderful lover. I think she was pleased to hear it."

"Poppy, that doesn't worry me any longer. I just want to make sure that you're all right. I want you to know . . . I wanted you to know that I care about you."

"I gathered that when you gave me your dessert." Poppy smiled at him.

Severus took a step toward her. "I wanted to say something, but I couldn't think of what. I hoped you would understand when I sat next to you that I didn't like the way we left things."

"I know." She reached up and caressed his face. "I'm glad that you came to see me. I feel sorry for those students in the library, but I'm glad that you came to see me."

"So am I. I also could use your services. I have some soreness. You mentioned a potion."

"I did mention one. I don't have any here, though. It's in my quarters."

"Would you mind sharing?"

"Not at all. I could bring it back to you, or you could come with me now."

"I will come with you so we can take care of it as soon as possible."

Severus followed Poppy into her quarters.

"It's in my bedroom," she said, beckoning him to follow her.

Severus looked around him. She had a nice, light room decorated in pale blue and yellow. It was pretty and soft, like her.

Poppy picked up a squat jar from her dressing table and handed it to him. "You're welcome to borrow it or put it on now."

"I think I may need help with the proper application of the potion," he said, his voice low. "Could you help me, Madam Pomfrey?"

"You are right," she agreed, her eyes sparkling. "It is important to apply it correctly. Show me where you're sore. I will apply it for you."

Severus took off his teaching robe and laid it on her bed, then he removed his frockcoat and dropped it next to the robe.

"How much would you like me to undress for you?"

"I believe it is best to have complete, unobstructed access to the affected area," Poppy said, trying to maintain a straight face.

Severus sat on the bed and removed his boots and socks, then he took off his waistcoat and placed it with the rest of his clothes. Finally, he unbuttoned his braces and trousers and removed those with his pants.

"Where is your soreness?" Poppy asked.

Severus moved aside his shirttail and indicated his penis.

"You will need to remove your shirt in order to do this properly. We can't have it get in the way."

Severus quickly removed his shirt, then, for good measure, he pulled off his undershirt.

"I am surprised you don't roast in all those layers," Poppy remarked, looking at the pile of clothing on the end of her bed.

"The dungeons are cool. And there are charms."

Poppy unscrewed the lid to the jar. "Show me where it hurts."

Severus pointed to his penis, which was beginning to expand.

"Where should I begin?" Poppy asked with faux seriousness.

"Here," he said, touching the head of his penis.

Poppy began to smooth the potion over the head of his cock, doing it very slowly, then she put some potion on two fingers and began to circle the edge of his crown.

"More?" she asked.

"Yes. I think I need intensive treatment."

Poppy smiled and continued down his shaft, putting more potion on her fingers. "I think it should be well applied. Massaged in so that we can be sure that it is absorbed."

"That is a wise idea. I am glad you are doing this. I might have done it wrong," Severus replied.

He closed his eyes as Poppy stroked his cock.

"How is the soreness?" she asked, her hand closed around his full erection.

"Completely gone," he said.

"You know, I think that we ought to test it out. Make sure that you are completely functional."

"I fully concur," Severus replied with a nod. "Do you have a suggestion for how we might do this?"

"I believe I can assist with that. I wouldn't mind if you were to test your functioning on me. Of course, we should make this a thorough test. I don't think we can be absolutely certain unless it is thorough. So you should lie down on the bed whilst I prepare."

Severus lay down and watched Poppy undress and drape her clothing over her vanity bench.

"I think we should be sure that you are functional in different positions," Poppy said with a poorly suppressed smile. "We'll begin with me on my back, if that is acceptable to you."

"I trust your judgment." The corners of Severus's mouth twitched.

Poppy lay down beside Severus and he rolled on top of her, pushing her legs apart with his own, supporting himself on his hands. He shifted until he could feel his cock at her opening, and he entered slowly.

"What is your assessment, Madam Pomfrey?" he asked as she let out a soft sigh.

"It feels good, quite good, but in order to be sure, I think you will need to move. In and out."

Severus pumped a few times, then said, "Satisfactory?"

"Perhaps just a bit more," she replied, letting out a slight moan as he immediately began moving again.

"This seems to be achieving some results," Severus said with a smirk.

"Quite." Poppy's face was flushed and her eyes dark. "Now, I think, lying on your left side."

They lay face-to-face, and Poppy put her left leg around him as he guided his cock into her.

"Very nice," Poppy said. "How does it feel when you move?"

Severus began to push in and pull out, and Poppy moved with him.

"Mmm . . . very good," Poppy said, trying not to moan. "But we need to see how it is when you enter from behind."

"I think from behind and standing up," Severus said.

"Excellent suggestion," Poppy replied with a nod.

Poppy bent over her bed, and she felt Severus find her entrance with his fingers then push up into her with his cock.

"This is very good," Poppy said. "Most stimulating." She was gasping now, with no more pretense of aloofness.

"I think we need to see if my cock can make you come. Can you come?" He thrust into her over and over again.

"Oh, just . . . oh, like that, yes . . . good, good, yes . . ." She moaned, feeling his long, hard cock in her, repeatedly hitting her sweet spot as he thrust, his hips moving against her buttocks, his hands at her waist, holding her still as he pounded into her.

"Oh gods, Severus, you're so good, so good, oh oh oh oh! Severus!" Poppy gasped and shouted his name as she came, powerful, hot waves of pleasure coursing through her as his cock continued to thrust in her.

Running his hands up her sides, Severus leaned over and kissed her back as he pulled out, then he said, "Now I believe that we need to see if I can come, in order to fully test my functionality."

"You have no objections from me," Poppy said, taking in a deep breath and letting it out in a long, content sigh.

He rolled Poppy over and pushed her farther back up on the bed. Kissing her lips gently, he lay on top of her and moved to position his erection between her legs, then he guided his cock into her. She moaned softly as she put her arms around him and ran her hands over his back. His eyes closed, Severus began to rock his hips, twisting as he pushed into her, then pulling part way out and doing it again, pumping slowly.

"Oh, so good, Poppy, so good, love it, Poppy, so good, so good deep in you. Never want it to end." He kissed her and moaned. "You're so good. So hot and sexy. Oh, Poppy, Poppy."

Severus groaned and began to move faster, thrusting harder as Poppy arched her back and moved in time with his thrusts, his cock pumping in and out, and her excitement mounting with each thrust.

"Severus, Severus, oh oh oh!" Poppy gasped and moaned, her hands grasping his buttocks as she came again, a long, deep orgasm as strong as the last.

Severus began to come as Poppy did, pushing hard into her, trying to go impossibly deep into her as he ejaculated.

"Oh, gods, Poppy, oh, fuck," he choked. "Gods, oh, gods, oh, Poppy, oh, oh...I love you! I love you, Poppy! Love you! Oh, gods, oh, Poppy, Poppy! Oh, oh, Poppy!"

He collapsed on top of her, panting, tears rolling down his cheeks. He could feel her hands stroking his back and combing through his hair.

When his brain was finally clear, he wished he could hide. He remembered what he had said. It had just popped out. Worse, it seemed he had been crying. Really crying, not just his eyes watering a bit.

Poppy kissed the side of his head. Severus swallowed and rolled over onto his back, his eyes closed. Maybe she hadn't heard him. She had been coming. It might all have been a blur to her. He felt Poppy's hand on his cheeks, wiping away the last of his tears, then she kissed his cheek.

"That must have been very good," she said.

He nodded.

She caressed his chest for a while, and when he didn't move or say anything, she said, "It was quite intense. Given how many times we've done it in the last couple days, that's a good thing."

He nodded.

"It was good for you, wasn't it, Severus? It didn't disappoint you or hurt?"

"No, it was very good," he whispered.

"I'm glad. It was for me, and I thought it must have been for you, too, but I wasn't sure."

How do you tell a witch whom you've just had sex with that you didn't mean it when you told her you loved her? Severus didn't know which was more embarrassing, his apparent confession of love or his tears.

"If you're embarrassed about the tears," Poppy said softly, "don't be. It just happens sometimes. It can be a very emotional experience, and our bodies just do that."

"Not that much, though," Severus said, clearing his throat. He had teared up before with her, but nothing like this.

Poppy rose up on one elbow and kissed him gently on the lips. "I think we should get dressed now, Severus. I should check on the infirmary before we go down to dinner. If anyone had come by with anything important, they would have tried to find me here, but otherwise, they may have left a note. You're welcome to lie here for a bit if you want to, take your time getting dressed."

He nodded. "Thank you."

Severus watched Poppy dress. He still hadn't told her that he had talked to Gareth. Maybe telling her about that wasn't such a good idea.

"Poppy?"

"Yes?"

"What I said earlier, when we were in the middle of it, I didn't intend to say it."

"We yell out all kinds of things when we're in the middle of making love. As long as you don't call me by some other woman's name, you probably won't offend me," Poppy replied. "Not that we'll do this again."

"Of course." With a sense of deflation, Severus thought of his date on Friday. "That's for the best."

"Back to normal, and on good terms," Poppy said briskly. "I'll pop in before I go to dinner, but you don't need to wait for me if you want to leave before then."

Severus nodded sleepily.

NEXT

Chapter Forty-Five: An Esoteric Spell

Wednesday, 10 – Thursday, 11 March 1999

Severus learns a new spell. And could he be learning to enjoy some good-natured teasing?

Rated MA.

Characters: Severus Snape, Minerva McGonagall, Poppy Pomfrey, Gareth McGonagall