Chapter Forty: A Matter of Timing

Chapter Forty: A Matter of Timing

Tuesday, 9 March 1999

Severus was feeling somewhat sore, very hungry, and peculiarly out-of-sorts by the time his last class of the morning ended. He growled and snapped as he tried to make his way through a stampede of students on their way to the Great Hall. He must be getting soft; they didn't jump out of his way before he reached them anymore. He hadn't had a snack, and he was ravenous. He had also been distracted by thoughts of Poppy, which became worse as the morning wore on. He thought not only of her, but of Hermione. He felt conflicted. It had been bad enough when he had only had sex with Gareth. In a way, he could justify that to himself. It had been an extension of what they had done the previous day, before he had asked Hermione on a date, and Gareth was a man...and although he wasn't entirely certain why that should matter to him, it did.

With Poppy, it wasn't even that she was a witch, or that they hadn't had a previous physical relationship, but that his desire for her was very different from what he had wanted from Gareth, and much more intense. And it had been very, very good. Even as inexperienced as he was, he knew it had been. Poppy had certainly thought so, and he had enjoyed it in a way he had never enjoyed sex with anyone, even with Minerva when he was under the Adfectus, and that spell had added to the pleasure of their coupling and his orgasm. The sex with Gareth had been good and highly unexpected, but there had been something that had been missing. It wasn't affection. He had felt a great deal of affection from him. Sexually, he hadn't felt as free with Gareth, and it hadn't felt as all-encompassing as sex with Poppy. Of course, Poppy was a witch, not a wizard, and that probably had been a factor, as well.

He never should have asked Poppy to stay, Severus decided as his second-year Slytherin-Gryffindor class pulverised their lace-wings. It had been wrong of him to do that after he had asked Hermione on a second date. He couldn't say that having sex with someone else was all right just because he hadn't dated her very long. That was a slippery slope, he told himself. If it was okay between the first and second dates, what about between the third and fourth? Or after dating for a month, as long as they hadn't been intimate? At what point would it become no longer acceptable to have sex with other people? No, he shouldn't be having sex with anyone else now that he was going to be dating Hermione.

By the time the second-year class was stirring the final potions, which varied in their degrees of greenish-yellow, Severus told himself that that idea was too extreme. He and Poppy had known each other longer than Hermione had been alive. She had saved his life, just as Hermione had, though perhaps not as dramatically. Poppy was an attractive witch, and kind and good. He and Hermione had shared one kiss after a date that he hadn't intended to be a date. He had made no pledges to her, and he had retracted his request that she not date other people, and she had agreed it was far too soon for such a thing. For all he knew, she could be boffing someone else. That Muggle boy she had economics class with. The thought upset him. If she was having sex with other people, he had a right to have sex with others, too.

As he outlined the steps of that day's potion for the third-year Hufflepuff-Ravenclaw class, he told himself that his justification for having sex was as absurd as the notion that asking someone out on a second date was tantamount to a declaration of sexual exclusivity. He still couldn't shake his sense that he had betrayed Hermione somehow, and yet he hated the thought that his time with Poppy had been wrong. It hadn't felt wrong. But he knew that sometimes he was very good at fooling himself and telling himself that something was all right just because it was what he wanted to do.

By the time he had Vanished the potions brewed by the entire sixth-year class, telling them that they were all incompetent dunderheads who were incapable of brewing a cup of tea, let alone a potion, he decided that the entire problem was that he was not suited for relationships with others. Any kind of relationships. Even attempting a friendship with a normal person wasn't possible for someone like him. Going out on a date with Hermione had been wrong, letting Gareth touch him on Saturday and fuck him on Sunday had been wrong, and Poppy . . . that had been wrong, too.

But the thought that being with Poppy had been wrong, when the memory of her passion and her warmth was so present, so fresh...that seemed more wrong. He remembered waking up next to her. He couldn't think of a night, an entire night, he had ever spent with anyone in his whole life. And she had been so warm and giving. It had been sex, but it had also been more than just sex. Perhaps that was why he felt guilty. It wasn't just the sex, nor just that Poppy was a witch and not a wizard, and whatever that might mean. Being with Poppy had felt meaningful to him. He had lost himself in her when they were together, and it had felt wonderful. He had thought he didn't want it to happen again, and Poppy had agreed that they were lovers for only one night, to return to being just colleagues the next day, but it had been so very good. He liked her, he liked being with her, he cared about her . . .

The thought of having a relationship with Poppy beyond that one night was absurd. The two of them together. That was more absurd than the thought of him with Hermione. He must be in love with Hermione, though. He simply had loved being with Poppy. And he would like it to happen again. Yes, he admitted to himself, regardless of what either of them had said, he would like it to happen again.

By the time he sat down to lunch, Severus was thoroughly confused. He saw Poppy come in and take her seat. She didn't pay him any more attention than usual, though he did think she looked lovely and quite cheerful. She wasn't plagued by doubts apparently. Whatever he did, if he had made a mistake by sleeping with her, he couldn't take it out on her. It wasn't her fault if he had bad judgment, after all. Not about her, but the timing. It was all just such bad timing. He blamed it all on Gareth. If he hadn't touched him, kissed him, massaged him, made him feel, he wouldn't have asked Hermione on a date, at least not so soon. If he hadn't been with Gareth, he wouldn't have had his already-increasing libido stimulated, and if he hadn't been with him, he wouldn't have begun thinking about Poppy's breasts and become so very aware that she was an attractive witch. He could be comfortably miserable at that moment, and not so confused and torn in two.

It was all just a matter of timing, Severus thought as he ate his chicken sandwich without tasting it. If he had left before Hermione had come home on Saturday, he never would have asked her on a date. He'd still be acutely aware of his reawakened sexual desire, but even if he had seen Gareth the next day and still had sex with him, then gone to dinner with him and consequently begun contemplating Poppy's sexual attractiveness, and then seduced her, somewhat accidentally, he might have done all that, but he wouldn't be feeling torn. It was all because he had gone on a date with Hermione and asked her out on a second one. He might still long for her and believe himself in love with her, but he wouldn't be so confused about what he should do and whether what he had done was right or wrong. He would simply wish to be able to be with Poppy again.

Severus kept himself from sighing and began eating his vanilla custard without tasting it. He couldn't turn back time and change things. He didn't know what to do. Perhaps he was making it all too complicated. He was so used to being under pressure and having difficult decisions to make with no good choices, perhaps he was over-analysing everything. One thing was certain, he didn't think that he should be expending so much energy and emotion on it. He should just enjoy it. He hadn't had very much pleasure in his life, after all. He had earned some, surely. He would just make one decision at a time.

As he sat and watched the seventh-year class brew their potions, he wondered whether Gareth would envy him. He had slept with Poppy. He had had sex with her. He had made her come nine times. If they had had more time, he thought that he could have brought her even more pleasure. It would have been nice to have had her sit on the chair with him, having her ride him and come. He could hold her breasts and tease her nipples and suck them whilst she moved on his cock. She might be able to come a few times doing that. He knew there were spells that could increase a wizard's lasting power, but the only one he could remember was one of the ones that Bella had used, and that one was unpleasant, to put it mildly. He never had wanted to last with the prostitutes, so he never bothered to learn any. He would have to see whether there were any texts in the Restricted Section, or perhaps in the Headmistress's Library. If he still had his grandfather's books, there would likely be something in them, but the Dark Lord had taken them, all of the good ones, and he'd never got them back. Maybe Gareth knew some good spells.

The class ended and he had them leave their potions on his desk. He closed and warded the door behind them. They were his last class of the day. He very quickly glanced over the potions and assigned each one a grade. At this point, he could tell by the colour and consistency who had brewed them, and he was rarely wrong. He didn't care about that at the moment, though. He just jotted down the grades and banished the potions.

Severus sat behind his desk again and looked out at the empty classroom, but not seeing it. If he learned a good spell from Gareth, he could have Poppy ride him until she was sated. He would enjoy that, unlike when Bella did it. Poppy was gorgeous, her breasts bounced when she rode him, and she loved to give him pleasure, too, he could tell. She had sucked his cock and put her fingers in his anus, after all, and when he had seemed unsure about something, she was warm and sympathetic. She would never restrain him and take her pleasure whilst causing him pain. If they ever tried anything he didn't like, he knew she would stop. He wouldn't even have to say anything. She seemed to be able to tell. Poppy was very sensitive. But he would love to have her sit in his lap on his chair and have her ride him and ride him until she came again and again. He would tease her breasts and tell her how sexy she was. Gods, that was power! And although Poppy was obviously not inexperienced, he didn't think that she was an easy lay, either. He had made the starchy Hogwarts matron desire him, and he had given her pleasure over and over.

His thoughts were arousing him, but he just took enjoyment in the arousal. Yes, Gareth might be able to teach him some spells. And if he did, they would have to practise them. And he would want to know why he was interested. He could tell him that he had fucked Poppy and she had come nine times, but that wasn't enough, that they were both insatiable. Gareth would be envious. He might want to have him tell him how it felt to fuck her, how sexy her breasts were. He could tell him about it whilst they were practising the spells. They could spend a night pleasuring each other. Gareth might go down on him again, swallowing his cum.

Severus pressed his hand against his erection. He needed to see Gareth. He needed to ask his advice about Hermione and to ask him about sex spells. They wouldn't really practise them, though. That wouldn't be a good idea. He would just do that on his own. Not that he would actually be able to use them with Poppy . . . even though he wanted to. Maybe with Hermione someday. After they had been together for a while. And after they had had regular sex and he knew what she liked. Hermione would need to be treated with the deference she deserved.

He pulled out a piece of parchment and wrote a note to Gareth. It was Tuesday night. Hermione wouldn't be back from her Muggle classes until at least ten o'clock or later, since she always went out with friends afterward. Not that it would matter if she were home or not. His note was short and to the point: "McG...Must see you. Spinner's End. Tonight....S.S.S."

He went up to the Owlery and sent off his note, then started down to the Great Hall for dinner. On his way, he met Poppy on the stairs, also going down.

"Good evening, Madam Pomfrey," he said, meeting her eyes.

She smiled at him. "Good evening, Professor Snape."

"On your way to dinner?"

"I have to stop by the Hospital Wing first. I was just paying a house call on Professor Flitwick."

Severus raised an eyebrow. He hoped it wasn't the sort of house call she had paid him. Despite Flitwick's attachment to Pomona, he had heard stories about the little wizard's unusual sexual prowess. He remembered one long-forgotten Defence teacher leaning over and whispering to him that if a witch had had sex with Flitwick even once, she was putty in his hands and would do anything to have sex with him again. Severus thought that was an exaggeration, but even so, there might be a kernel of truth to it.

Poppy chuckled softly. "One of his first-year Hufflepuffs had a bit of an accident," she whispered. "Filius was covered with short purple fur. It was very funny."

Severus quirked a smile at her. He found himself walking down the fourth-floor corridor toward the Hospital Wing with her.

"I wish I had seen him."

Poppy looked around then lifted her finger to her lips. "Shh, don't tell anyone, and it's a little bit of a violation of professional ethics to share this, but I took a photograph of him. Purely for purposes of his health records, of course. I thought it important to document."

Severus nodded seriously. "Yes, very important to document."

"I just want to drop off the camera before I go down," she said as she approached the door to her rooms.

"I will wait for you," Severus replied.

They stepped into her sitting room and he closed the door behind them. Poppy took the camera from her skirt pocket and put it in a cupboard, then began to take off her matron's cap.

She turned and looked up at him. "Did you have a good day, Severus?"

He hesitated. "My morning started off very well, but once I left my rooms, it was not as pleasant. The afternoon was better."

"Well," Poppy said with a smile, "it would have been very hard for the rest of the day to be as nice as the start to my morning was."

"Yes, it was very good," Severus said in a low voice, looking down into her eyes. "Truly . . . exceptional."

"It was the best one I can remember in a very long time," Poppy agreed, feeling a flush rise in her cheeks.

"No regrets?" Severus asked.

Poppy shook her head. "None. I hope you don't have any."

He raised his hand and caressed her cheek briefly. "Reservations and questions, but not regrets," he said softly. "It was wonderful. And if I did have any regrets, I would not blame you, and I would still be grateful."

Severus didn't understand the tears in Poppy's eyes. "What is it, Poppy? I am sorry if I said the wrong thing. I am not very good with these kinds of things."

"No, no, Severus," Poppy said, taking his hand and bringing it to her lips, kissing his knuckles. "It isn't that you said anything wrong. It is that what you said, it was supremely right. Perfect. It makes me certain that it was not a mistake to go to you last night."

Severus cupped Poppy's face with his hand. He didn't know what to say. After a long moment, Poppy reached up and put her hand behind his neck and drew him down into a kiss. It began softly, sensually, but rapidly became more passionate as Severus pulled her toward him, one hand on her buttocks, the other still caressing her face. He pressed himself against her, and she could feel his erection beneath his robes. She rolled her hips and he moaned into her mouth.

Poppy broke away and looked up at him, lips parted, panting.

Severus nodded. "Yes," he whispered.

He kissed her as she unhooked his robes then unbuttoned the bottom buttons of his frockcoat. He untied her pinny and broke the kiss long enough to lift it over her head. As she unbuttoned his trousers, he kissed her neck and fumbled with her Charmed hooks until they all unfastened at once. She gasped against his chest as he kissed her shoulders and pushed the bodice of her robes down. Poppy reached inside his pants and grabbed his cock, squeezing its firm length. He let go of her, looked down at her breasts, then knelt quickly and reached up under her skirts to pull down her knickers.

"Now, now," he said urgently.

Poppy stepped back out of her knickers and pulled him toward the couch. When she backed up against it, Severus pushed her down and lifted her skirts. She spread her legs, and he half-knelt on the floor, half on the couch beside her, and put his fingers into her.

"Oh, so slick, such a sexy fuck," he growled.

"I want you, Severus," Poppy gasped as he teased her clitoris.

He slid back onto the couch, and Poppy sat up, moved aside his robes and jacket, pushed down the front of his pants, and straddled his lap as he lifted her skirts out of the way. She lowered herself onto his cock with a loud gasp. Severus closed his eyes tightly and let out a low groan, holding Poppy by her waist. Poppy rode him urgently, rising and falling, pushing against him and rubbing her clitoris against the wool of his frockcoat. Severus opened his eyes as Poppy's moans grew louder and more desperate. Her eyes were closed, her lips were parted, sweat was running in small rivulets down her face, and her breasts were bouncing against his chest. Her repeated shouts and rocking against him as she came brought him right to the edge. He held onto her and pushed her to the floor and kept up the rhythm, pumping, thrusting, and then coming, pushing into her with a shuddering groan.

Severus lay on top of her, his chest heaving, waiting for his heart rate to slow, then he rolled off and rested on the floor beside her, his legs crowded by the sofa. He groped for his wand, then cast a cooling charm, first on Poppy, then on himself.

She chuckled breathlessly. "Thank you, Severus. I think a shower would be even better, but if we're going to get to dinner, we don't have time." She found her wand. "If I may, I can cast a few nice cleaning charms for you."

He turned his head and gave her a crooked smile. "You haven't had to do that for me for professional reasons for quite a while."

"I definitely prefer to cast them for this reason," Poppy said, returning his smile.

After she cast the charms, she said, "I didn't think we were going to do this again, Severus."

"I didn't either," he said as he straightened his clothes.

"Let me just check myself in the mirror...you can go on ahead, if you'd like," Poppy said as she headed for her bathroom.

"No, I'll wait for you." It wouldn't be very gentlemanly to fuck her then just walk out, especially when they were both going to the Great Hall. He might usually behave like an unmannerly boor, but he could be courteous when he wanted to be.

Poppy fixed her hair quickly, then cast a Glamour to reduce the pink in her complexion. Minerva would be curious enough when they entered the Great Hall together...late. No point in giving her or anyone else anything to speculate about.

They entered the Great Hall walking side-by-side at a perfectly appropriate collegial distance, Severus attempting to keep a semblance of a sneer on his face. When he saw the staff table, it was all he could do to keep from grimacing. Albus was having them play musical chairs again, and Benetti was attending dinner that night, which she rarely did when she wasn't scheduled to be there. There were only two places left, next to each other, and one of them was next to Duffy. He hoped that Poppy would take that seat. He wouldn't mind sitting next to Cahill, for all that the new History teacher was almost as big a bore as Binns had been. At least he was a living bore, not a dead one, Severus thought, though he might be able to bore his audiences to death.

Severus wished that he had had some say in who had been hired to fill the vacant positions, but Minerva had promised to leave him alone during the summer and let him think about whether he wanted to return to Hogwarts. Of course, her notion of leaving him alone was different from his. She had written him letters two or three times a week, though rarely mentioning anything at all to do with Hogwarts, but always ending them expressing her hope that she would be seeing him in the autumn and that she looked forward to working with him as her Deputy under more normal conditions than they had. She must have had great faith that he would return, because she never advertised for another Potions teacher.

Happily, Poppy sat beside Duffy, leaving him with Cahill on his right. Cahill was holding forth on some obscure wizarding laws of the sixteenth century, and Filius was politely nodding his head. Severus thought that probably whatever Cahill was talking about, Filius already knew or wasn't interested in. Aside from Dumbledore, Filius was the most well-read wizard he knew, though he didn't know very much about the Dark Arts, as opposed to Dumbledore, who knew more about those than most Dark Wizards did.

Severus listened to Cahill drone on, his peculiar cadence and pomposity grating on his last nerve, and thought about what he and Poppy had just done in her rooms. That certainly hadn't been a good idea, but it had felt very good. She really was a sexy fuck, he thought, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. She hadn't put her pinny back on after she had pulled the bodice of her robe back up, and he could see the creamy skin of her chest, and he knew that beneath her robes were equally creamy breasts with darkly rosy nipples. He averted his eyes and turned his attention to his food.

A sexy fuck. He couldn't imagine saying such words to Hermione. He could see him telling her that she was attractive and that he wanted to make love to her, but he couldn't imagine talking to her about fucking. But if they were fucking, there would be no need to talk about it. Whilst they were fucking, he could just tell her he loved her, if that wasn't too mawkish to say during sex, and that she was beautiful, all the ways that she was beautiful. He might feel differently after they had been together for a while, of course, but in the beginning, he would be very gentle and careful with her and learn what she liked and didn't like. If they got that far, of course. Their relationship might end before that...another reason to be very careful with her feelings. He didn't want to lose her altogether if they broke up. It would be hard to see her with someone else, but he valued her friendship and he didn't want to lose it.

He had been such a fool with Lily. If he hadn't behaved so badly, they might at least have been able to reestablish their friendship. Potter might not have liked it, but Lily wasn't one to let her husband choose her friends for her. She had backbone. But he had behaved badly, then he had behaved more badly, and then he had joined the Death Eaters. That was a clear friendship-ender there.

Minerva was right, he thought as he finished his pork roast. He seemed to make very self-destructive decisions sometimes. Usually when he was acting out of anger, hurt, vengefulness, spite, bitterness, or hubris...or occasionally, sheer stupidity, though that wasn't usually the case.

Even if being with Poppy was a bad idea, he didn't think it was of the same sort as his other mistakes. He wasn't acting out of bitterness or spite, certainly, although he might be being selfish and self-centred. He glanced over at Poppy again. They were talking about Quidditch. Duffy was clearly quite a Quidditch fan. She was telling Poppy about some Beater, whom she apparently thought was the epitome of male attractiveness. Severus really didn't think that such a thing was an appropriate subject for the staff dining table. Students might overhear, for one thing, and it was mixed company. He thought that if he began waxing on about the pulchritude of some female Quidditch player, particularly in terms similar to those Duffy was using...she had just said something about "sex on legs...or a broomstick," then giggled...he would be hexed and chased from the Great Hall by hordes of indignant witches. He was pleased to see that Poppy was not giggling or contributing her own assessment of some wizard. She did nod and say something about him certainly being an attractive wizard, but that was perfectly appropriate.

"Severus, Severus?"

Severus turned his head toward the two witches. "Yes, Professor Duffy?" He tried to be coldly polite, but not too cold, since he didn't want Poppy to find him offensive.

"You can call me 'Sarah,' you know," she said with a little giggle. Gods, the woman was annoying.

He nodded in acknowledgment.

"I was wondering if you would care to join me for that drink we discussed having yesterday?" she asked.

Severus froze. He would like to put her in her place, and he certainly would like to discourage her from inviting him any time in the future, but he was trying to be on his best behaviour, especially with Poppy sitting right there between them. He hoped Poppy didn't think that he wanted anything to do with Duffy.

He looked at Poppy. In an instant, he knew that she was aware of his predicament, and an amused look crossed her face and then was gone.

"I do hope, Professor Snape," Poppy said, "that you have not forgotten your promise to me."

"Promise . . ."

Poppy shook her head as if disgusted with his memory. "You promised that you would discuss that toxic concoction that Cheever and Hargraves created yesterday, what they substituted for the dragonfly wings, so that I can devise a better remedy if it should happen again. You did say that they were going to have to brew the potion again in detention and that they're both dunderheads. They might do the same thing again."

"Ah, yes. I did." Severus nodded. "I am sorry, Professor Duffy, but I must decline again."

"After, perhaps?" the Divination teacher asked. "That won't consume your entire evening, will it? I'm sure that Poppy will be happy to let you have the rest of the evening to yourself."

At that moment, a Horned Owl flew in and headed straight for Severus. He took the letter, which was just a small parchment folded in three and sealed with a charm. He broke the seal and looked at the letter, holding it so that Poppy couldn't see its contents. Cahill on his other side was now talking about the evolution of laws governing inter-being relationships and was unlikely to try to read it. It was almost as short as his own note had been. "SS...8 o'clock. SE = your place? No reply nec unless other....McG"

He refolded the note and turned back toward Duffy. "Madam Pomfrey and I will be having a very short discussion, but I have another engagement directly thereafter," he said with relief. Looking at Poppy, he added, "If you are finished with your dinner, we could have our discussion now."

NEXT

Chapter Forty-One: A Fast Learner

Tuesday, 9 March 1999

Severus enjoys his new-found power to bring pleasure.

Rated MA.

Warning for sexually explicit content.

Characters: Severus Snape, Poppy Pomfrey, Minerva McGonagall

Author's Note: If you're unfamiliar with the other fics in the "Resolving a Misunderstanding universe" (to which A Long Vernal Season and Death's Dominion belong) and are interested in reading them but haven't any idea where to begin, there's a new post* on my WordPress blog that might help you out, which divides them into three separate, manageable sets. All of the fics can be found at the Petulant Poetess. Ratings range from K+ through MA, and there are several one-shots.

*An active link to the page doesn't work, so you can cut and paste this: http://mmadfan.com/list-links-to-mmadfan-fics/my-fics-sorted-by-type/resolving-a-misunderstanding-universe-stories/ It's also available on my LJ, though in a slightly different form.