Chapter 25

Scorpius entered the office about an hour after school the next afternoon. Severus looked up and said, "There you are, Mr. Malfoy. Come in, come in. Please have a seat, and we will talk about your lessons." Severus stood and came around his desk and sat on the edge.

Scorpius sat down in the big chair. It made him look smaller. He fidgeted with his hands and picked at his nails nervously.

Severus towered over him from that position. "You should be proud of the work you did in class today, Scorpius. Madam Pomfrey was quite pleased with the Pepperup Potion you brewed. She said it was the most potent batch she's ever seen a student brew."

Scorpius looked pleased for a brief second, but then he masked it with a scowl. "I just followed the instructions; any student could have done it."

"They could have made the potion, yes, but not the quality of yours. I was watching, and you used a different stir pattern. Why did you do that?" Severus asked, genuinely interested.

"The ingredients have to be integrated a slightly different way," Scorpius explained.

"I did a lot of changing potion instructions in my day. You could write your own book."

"You don't have to pretend to like me or encourage me, Professor." His voice had a hard edge to it. "I want to get through these lessons and be done with this."

Severus stared down at the little brat. "I don't like you, Scorpius. There's no reason I can think of to like you. I suffered much at your hands. I'd just as well Obliviate you than stand here and talk to you," Severus said, glaring down at the boy. "My wife wants me to do this. You put one foot out of line, and I will break your wand and sentence you to a nonmagical life. You will be a squib. Is that what you want?" He was now down in the boy's face.

Scorpius drew back until his head touched the back of the chair and there was nowhere else to go. He could see the hardness in the man, and he felt his body start to tremble with fear. He could not imagine anything more horrible than a life without magic.

Severus stood, went to a cabinet behind the desk, and pulled out the Pensieve. He sat it on a lower table close to Scorpius. Never taking his eyes off the boy, he brought his wand to his forehead, and a long strand of silver appeared and attached itself to his wand. Severus waved it over the Pensieve and shook it off. It landed and spread out in the Pensieve like silver water.

"We will be seeing events from the past. We will visit a number of memories, and you will see what it was like to be alive in that time under the mastership of Voldemort. Your grandfather will be with me in nearly all, if not all, the memories."

Scorpius was watching, fascinated. The silver reflection in his eyes made him look alien, and he got closer and stared down into the bowl.

"You cannot make me hate my grandfather, no matter what you show me."

"Scorpius, I do not want to make you hate him. I only want you to see that he perhaps glorified things, and they were not so pretty. Life was hard then, and there were few rewards at our Master's hands. We were like white rats to him. He used us to experiment on and torture for his own amusement. He used us to lie, steal, and on occasion murder good people."

"When I say go, you will plunge your face into the memory. Try not to get disoriented when you are dragged into it. You will see the events of the day, but no one there can hear or see you. I will be there as well, Scorpius."

The boy nodded, not taking his eyes off the memory.

Severus stood on one side and he on the other. "This was one of Lucius and my first meetings with Voldemort. Now go!" he commanded and plunged his face in. He felt Scorpius join him.

They fell through a tunnel of light and color and found themselves in the Forbidden Forest. Two boys, one about 15 and one about 17, were making their way through the dense, dark trees. They were as different as night and day. One was obviously rich and wore clothing fit for one of high stature. He had long, blond almost white, silky hair, and the nails of his hands were manicured. He had a superior air about himself. The other was lanky and awkward, and he wore cast-off clothing that was too big for him. His hair hung in greasy long strands as black as a raven's wing. They were hopping from fallen tree limbs to stumps, trying to make it through the forest with out touching the ground. They laughed as they went. The boys played the game to take their minds off their destination. They were going to see the dark wizard Tom Riddle. He promised great power. For the blond boy, whose name was Lucius, it gave him vision of being richer and having enormous power. For the poor boy, it was simply a place to belong and to be accepted by peers.

Severus glanced at Scorpius who stood next to him. The boy's face was unreadable as he watched the teenage version of his grandfather. Severus realized how much Scorpius looked like Lucius at that age.

The young Severus took a misstep and fell onto the forest floor. Lucius laughed and landed next to him, holding out his hand. Severus extended his hand, and Lucius pulled him to his feet and said, "See, old buddy, if you would go out for Quidditch, you would learn balance, and you wouldn't have two left feet."

"Quidditch is a sport for the rich with fancy brooms or idiots who can't spell their own names to have some glory in their lives. Potions will get you power and richness if you're gifted enough," he said, dusting his backside off.

"Well, that's your opinion. I like Quidditch, and it's better than sitting in a stuffy old library all the time. But you're right; your knowledge of Potions is what will help you get into Voldemort's good graces. You have little else to offer him," he said rather bluntly.

Severus saw Scorpius grin at his grandfather's stinging comment. Severus found his chest constricting with emotion. He'd had no idea how hard this was going to be. He'd just as soon never revisit his life back then. He wished he could reach out and change the course for Severus and Lucius by telling them that the path they were heading on tonight would bring them terrible suffering. But it was only a memory and therefore set in stone. For his friend Lucius, there was no redemption; for himself, there was the joy Hermione brought to him each day.

The boys had come to a clearing in the forest. There was a fire burning there, and other young men wandered in and out of the light. They stepped from the forest and came into the light only to find about eight wands pointed in their direction.

"Who goes there?" a gruff voice asked.

"Malfoy and Snape," Lucius said. "We are here by invitation. We are here for glory." This was the pass phrase he'd been told to say.

The wands were lowered, and a deep voice called out from the shadows. "Come closer to the light so I might look at you."

The two boys walked closer to the fire. There was the smell of molding forest leaves and fungus; the smoke from the fire irritated their eyes.

"I see why I can use your strengths blond one, but what does the other have to offer? He is but a cast-off."

Lucius bowed low. "Dark Lord, this boy is very gifted in Potions. He will no doubt be a Master one day. You will have need of a great Potions maker as you rise to power."

A tall man stepped into the light. He had an aura of great power about him. His eyes were so dark they were nearly black. He had a thick head of hair and wore it short. His clothing spoke of wealth though Scorpius knew he had been poor like Snape. He must be availing himself of someone's money.

He drew an ash grey wand. With it, he forced the boys to their knees.

"He could have just asked," Scorpius whispered.

"Yes, he could have, but that was never his way," Severus explained.

"You wish to pledge yourself to me and allow me to direct your lives. I promise you there will be riches enough for all of us...riches and powers you cannot fathom. What say ye?" he asked.

Severus felt his body tremble with the emotion of seeing this again. As a teen, he'd realized as he'd kneeled there with his nose nearly to the ground that if he refused he would die. This Dark Lord was raising an army of wizards to take over the wizarding world. Yet he had had no loyalties to the world and ideas Dumbledore supported; he had never been given a fair shot. The "good" boys could torture him and get slaps on the wrist. If he retaliated, he got detentions for weeks. He heard Lucius say, "I will pledge myself to you, my Lord."

"What say you, Potion-master-in-the-making?" Tom Riddle asked.

"I pledge myself to you, Dark Lord. My talent will be yours."

"Raise up on your knees and extend your left arms," he demanded.

The boys rose up and held out their arms. Riddle pressed the tip of his wand into Lucius's arm, and Lucius clenched his teeth against the pain. Blackness bubbled up under his skin, and he fought his fear and the desire to cry out. The death mask and snake tattoo formed quickly, and Riddle pulled the wand away and turned toward Severus, who was now white as a sheet. The wand went against his arm, and he clenched his teeth lest he cry out as the tattoo formed on his arm.

Scorpius stood white, too, and Severus couldn't still his wildly beating heart. It was like watching an old picture show of Romeo and Juliet where you knew what the ending was, and you wanted to shout, "No, don't do that!" or "No, don't take the poison!" But it still happened every time.

Riddle smiled, but it wasn't a pleasant smile. "Learn what it means to be my enemy before you learn what it means to be my friend." He brandished his wand, "Crucio!"

Severus and Lucius were hit by the curse, and they screamed with pain and writhed on the ground.

Severus watched with his hands clenched and his nails biting into the flesh of his palms. He felt the warm blood drip down this fingers.

Scorpius swayed, and Severus grabbed him. Lucius was up on his knees, vomiting onto the dirt, and Severus followed. When Tom Riddle released them, they fell onto their faces.

Severus grabbed Scorpius and pulled him from the Pensive.

Scorpius was white as a sheet, and Severus dropped him into the chair and collapsed onto his own chair.

"If I did not care what path you are on, boy, I would not relive this nightmare of a life I had for anything," he said.

Scorpius asked, "Are we done?" He was green as could be.

"Yes, but I expect to see you at dinner. If you are ill, go see Madam Pomfrey. I will come to check on you if you do not show up."

The boy nodded and ran.

Hermione must have been waiting outside the door because she entered the room immediately and came to him. He buried his face between her breasts and cried. She stood for a long time caressing his hair and whispering words of love and encouragement to him.

"I'm sorry, Severus. I should never have asked you to do this. We can find another way."

"No," he said. "This is the only way to reach him. He showed real emotion and fear." Finally he stood and arm-in-arm they went into their rooms, and Severus washed his face. He took a potion to settle his stomach and nerves, and Hermione put dittany on the wounds on his hands. They made their way to the Great Hall.

"Let me go with you the next time. I will be more of an anchor and a comfort to you," she said as they went down the hall.

"Hermione, I don't want you to see that part of my life. I don't want you to see the horror it was. I could not bear it if you turned from me."

"Severus, I love you. That will not happen." She held his arm tightly.

"You cannot guarantee that. You do not know how bad it was. I was forced to kill innocents."

She pushed him into an alcove. "I know that, Severus. Do you think any of our hands are clean? All of us killed in that final battle. It was kill or be killed."

"That's defense; it's not cold blooded murder," he tried to explain.

"You survived. For you, it was self-preservation," she told him.

"Some would think it braver to die than to hurt others," he said, ashamed.

"You had to stay alive to help Harry. There was no other choice, Severus."

"I will think on it, Hermione. Please don't ask me for an answer tonight," he begged.

"All right." She drew him down for a kiss. "I will support you without question whatever you decide. You have my word."

He held her a moment and then pulled her out into the hall and they continued to the Great Hall. They went to their seats, and Severus looked over at the Slytherin table.

Scorpius sat in his usual place a little ways away from the last student. He was toying with the food on his plate, and he did not look up during the whole meal.

Hermione ate, but Severus pushed the food around on his plate as well. The images from his mind had brought back things he'd rather not feel. Images that had faded in his thoughts with time were so new, now, so real. Could he stand to resurrect more of them?

He felt Hermione take his hand. "Let's go home."

Scorpius watched them go. He still felt shaky inside at what he'd seen. He'd barely made it to the bathroom before losing his lunch. His grandfather, who was so regal, had been tortured and degraded for the glory of what? Maybe Professor Snape was trying to help him. But Scorpius wanted to see more. He would not allow Snape to know how much this had affected him.

For this story I have only a 3 year difference in age between Lucius and Severus.

Lisa, thank you so much for getting this to me so quickly. You are the best.

Angela and Becky, thank you for your comments and input.