Forty-One
Chapter 42 of 50
neelixHermione handed Alicia a large glass of white wine and motioned for her to sit on the sofa. Donovan was asleep, and they had just finished two plates of fish and chips from the takeaway. The conversation up to that point had been superficial and all but meaningless, chat about Donovan, the house – anything that would keep them away from the subject that had caused such tension between them. Hermione wasn’t one for avoiding things, however.
‘You don’t like him, do you?’ she stated.
‘Donovan? I think he’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen,’ Alicia said, taking a sip of wine.
‘I meant Severus, Alicia, as you well know.’ Hermione stared at her with hard eyes, and eventually the blonde witch had the good sense to lower her gaze and shrug slightly.
‘I hardly know him, so I can’t judge,’ she said eventually.
‘What happened, at the hospital?’ Hermione leant forward, making it very clear she would brook no avoidance.
‘Nothing, really. Severus was upset about Minerva; I told him I would do all I could to help. That’s all,’ she said calmly.
Hermione narrowed her eyes. ‘Why do I want to believe you and yet find it so hard to do so?’ she murmured.
Alicia shrugged again. ‘It’s the truth. Ask Severus,’ she said.
Hermione stared into her glass. The sound of Alicia saying Severus’s name, the syllables sliding through her teeth like silk, made her feel uncomfortable for some strange reason.
‘He really is a good person, Alicia. And you can’t deny, he is bloody clever,’ she said, smiling proudly.
‘He is exceptionally talented, you’re right. As for being good, well… that’s what girl talk is meant to be about, right? Finding out if they’re ‘good’, or hopeless?’ Alicia grinned and then guffawed loudly at her own joke, and Hermione couldn’t help but giggle.
‘No way. That is one bit of information that stays private.’ Hermione laughed.
‘Spoil sport!’ Alicia laughed again. ‘Go on… Just tell me. He’s a stallion, right?’
Hermione grinned and blushed madly. ‘Stop it, Alicia,’ she said, her voice soft. ‘I love him. He’s asked me to marry him, actually.’ She smiled shyly.
‘Oh, wow.’ Alicia let out a long sigh. ‘That’s fantastic news.’
She clinked her glass against Hermione’s and raised it in a silent toast. Hermione knew it wasn’t sincere, because she noticed the dark look that crossed Alicia’s face, albeit briefly.
‘So, he finally told you he loved you, huh?’ Alicia said, raising her eyebrows.
‘Well, no. But he didn’t have to. I know he loves me, Alicia. He doesn’t need to say it,’ Hermione said, defending him.
‘Well, I think it’s very good of him to stand by you and Donovan. He seems like the kind of guy who would do the right thing,’ Alicia responded, her tone innocent.
‘He didn’t ask me to marry him just because of Donovan,’ Hermione snapped out.
‘I’m glad, truly. You’re happy, that’s what counts, right?’ Alicia took a deep drink of her wine and reached for the bottle. ‘Top up?’
Hermione nodded and changed the subject, and they talked about work and advances in Charms until the bottle of wine was empty and they decided to retire. Alicia stayed in the living room, after Transfiguring the couch into a divan bed, and Hermione climbed the stairs heavily, wishing that Severus were there to curl up next to.
She lay awake for an hour, running over the events of the day in her head, and Alicia’s comments about Severus. He hadn’t actually told her he loved her, and he had changed towards her after he found out about Donovan. As she drifted off to sleep, she wondered if Alicia was right, and he was just standing by them because he felt a sense of responsibility. Perhaps he didn’t love her at all, and it was just a way to ensure he had a role in Donovan’s life.
She tried to stop herself weeping into her pillow and failed miserably.
***
Severus was waiting impatiently in his quarters. He felt exhausted after a sleepless night. He had missed Hermione and Donovan so much; he had been tempted just to Floo to Hilltop Cottage anyway. It was the presence of Alicia Maines that had made him keep his distance. He had seen enough man-hungry witches to recognise the type, and despite her friendship with Hermione, he didn’t trust her. Her actions yesterday had shocked him to no end and he couldn’t wait for the witch to go back from whence she came.
Breakfast in the Great Hall had irritated him. The noise level seemed greater than was usual, the scraping of chairs and the chatter of dunderheads had made his brain hurt, and even the wonderfully delicious breakfast hadn’t cheered him. He just wanted to get Minerva back to Hogwarts, so that he could get back to New Mills and start his family life proper.
He started to muse about Donovan, what he was having for breakfast and what outfit Lexie would force him to wear today, when the Floo activated, and Alicia Maines stepped into the room. Her long, blonde hair was groomed to perfection, and she was wearing red stilettos and a tight, grey pencil skirt and matching jacket. Although the jacket was buttoned, the top was gaping open to reveal the top of a lacy, red bra. Severus thought she looked like a prostitute, but said nothing as she met his gaze with a challenging look.
‘Good morning, Professor,’ she said slowly, holding her hand out.
Severus ignored her hand and the greeting. ‘Where’s Hermione?’ he asked crisply.
‘Lexie is running late. Hermione told me to come ahead so we can get started as soon as Barnabus arrives. He should be here shortly,’ she said.
‘Very well,’ he said. He stood to his full height and glared at her sharply. ‘How is my son?’
Alicia gave him a genuine smile. ‘Gorgeous, of course. He’s just like his father,’ she said bluntly.
Severus felt his face flushing, and turned away from her abruptly. ‘I will leave you to meet your friend. Come into the lab when he arrives.’
‘Professor,’ Alicia said quietly.
Severus stiffened, but turned to look at her. ‘Yes?’
‘I think that it’s just great, what you’re doing for Hermione and Donovan,’ she said.
‘I have no idea what you’re talking about,’ Severus replied.
‘Well, she let slip that you want to marry her and all. That’s such a good thing to do. It’s very hard raising a child alone these days,’ she said with sincerity.
‘Get to the point, Miss Maines,’ Severus said coolly. He didn’t like where this was going.
‘Hermione talked about you so much when she was in the States,’ Alicia said, ‘and about your break up. It’s always hard when one person loves the other person more, I think.’
Severus’s eyes hardened and narrowed and he frowned. ‘She said that she didn’t love me as much as I love her?’
‘Well, not in so many words, of course. Everything changes when a child comes along, don’t you think?’ Alicia smiled at him sweetly.
Severus felt his mouth go dry and his throat constrict suddenly. His vision was so clearly clouded by his feelings for Hermione that he hadn’t seen what was really going on. Of course the witch wouldn’t want to raise the child alone, and what better way to secure her own future than to entice him back with the lure of fatherhood?
‘I will see you in the lab, Miss Maines,’ he whispered, walking into his sanctuary quickly so that she wouldn’t hear the rasping sob that left him or see the tears as they dripped down his cheeks.
Alicia Maines watched him walk away with her head held high and a smirk on her face.
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Latest 25 Reviews for Hilltop Cottage
734 Reviews | 7.3/10 Average
This was such a great read, thanks for sharing! I was especially happy to see that Minerva recovered well enough to be able to attend Severus' and Hermione's wedding. It just wouldn't have been the same without her. And Donovan, you just know that boy is going to be such a heartbreaker. Well done!
God what a beautiful beginning. I got chills when I read the first few sentences of this chapter. It reminded me of a 19th century British novel.... something from Hardy. I love your writing. There are naughty bits that are fun to read, but you have a charming prose that just strikes me sometimes. So, I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your writing. THANK YOU!
Response from neelix (Author of Hilltop Cottage)
To be compared to Hardy made me smile :) You're very kind,but more than that I'm so happy you like the,story :)
For such inteligent people, in the love department they really had lower grades...so quick to think badly of one another, especialy Severus, but Hermione had her moments, too.
I was so glad when they finally learned and began to trust each other!!!
It was an interesting journey. Thank you.
Great story :) Excellent job with the buildup, realistic angst scenes, and a happy ending. I thoroughly enjoyed it!
WTF!! Why is she letting Alicia plant stupid doubts in her mind? Alicia doesn't even know Severus! And Severus was obviously not too happy with Alicia. For Merlin's sake! What the hell is the matter with Hermione?? When did she become so gullible and wishy washy? This isn't the Hermione who stood up to Malfoy and punched him in the face! She needs to take a pill or something.
And there are a hell of a lot of worse things in the world than a man who stands by you as the mother of his child!!! Get over the Cinderella complex Herms. 
OK! What the Fuck is wrong with Severus now? These aren't weak minded individuals. Snape is a freaking spy who fooled Voldemort for like 20 year, for gods sake! He should be able to see a BSer from a mile away! These two are really getting on my freaking left nerve. Doesn't Mister Ligilimens remember being inside Hermone's head? I don't know how much more of their BS I can stand. Get over yourselves Hermione and Severus! You two are freaking making me want to poke my damned eyes out!!!
Oooooh, I never would have thought! Severus will put her in her place. There's a reason Hermione is his first and only relationship. I'm sure Alicia isn't the first woman to come on to the Potion's Master. 
Too bad for Hermione, though. Betrayed by a friend. Hopefully if Alicia realizes tonight that they are engaged to be married she will back off, for Hermione's sake. I can't imagine she would think she had a chance with Severus if he want's to brush her off. He's a master at putting people in their place.
I'm looking forward to that if it becomes necessary.
I just hope this doesn't interfere with Minerva's cure.
Thank you, thank you, thank you, neelix! 
It was about time these two became a family. I'm so glad Hermione realizes she should not have left him. I will forgive her for breaking Severus' heart because of her youth and immaturity.
Now that she's a grown woman, she hopefully has her priorities straight. She can still be Dr. Granger, but she should keep it in prospective. Now, what about dear Minerva?
Severus wouldn't be the first man to change his ways once a father. If I was Severus though, like you said in the story, he needs to be sure she is committed to making this work and not leaving again when she feels hurt. Obviously she has no idea how she nearly killed him the first time she left him. By the same token, Hermione wouldn't be the first woman to grow up and make a committment to see the rough spots through rather than leave when things got rocky after having a child together. Everything changes when a couple says, you are stuck with me for the rest of our lives. How do you want to do the next 60 years? The hard way or the easy way? Make your choice.
Hopefully, she has seen that if you leave, you just change the problems you have for new ones. Unless there is physical abuse, infedelity or addiction, I think most things can be worked out. The 4 things just mentioned would be deal breakers for me. I hope they are happy together now. That's what stories are for. The happily ever after.
Please!!! It's not my place to say???? For God's sake! Let drag out the pain as long as possible shall we? Intereasting the penny dropped and Severus knew why he hadn't got her letter. Luna had told her but I guess she wasn't listening. I give up! Snapes blaming himself for being a jerk but she isn't blaming herself for anything at all. She didn't do anything wrong.
"What- an- idiot!" Hermione. How long did it take you to realize he didn't know.
I'm going back to Hermione's visit to St. Mungo's. Is she that thick? Did she hear Luna say he didn't get her letter, or at least take the hint that he may not have gotten her letter, the same as Minerva, and that she was wrong? Now she has a chance to do something about it and it doesn't seemed to have crossed her mind.
Poor Severus. I don't remember reading any stories where I liked Severus and thought Hermione was the idiot. Good original plot, just uncomfortable.
She didn't want to give up the parties and her work for Severus, but she has because she had his baby. Now, she's just lonely while giving them up. And it was all unecessry. He jumping to the conclusion that she left him for someone else, and she to he conclusion that he couldn't change.
You never even gave him a second chance to know he was wrong. Was it worth it Hermione, in the scope of things?
Did you think you were going to find someone else who understood you better and loved you more?
You could have been pregnant while with Severus and had a baby together.
There needs to be a smiley for="Self Absorbed!"
I'll think about it????
I had written a novel sized review after the last chapter but I hit one wrong button and lost it. Damn!!! I think I spent an hour and a half going back and researching the story so that I could review all the chapters I'd missed at the same time.
She needed to put chapter 14 in a pensive.
As for this
"Hermione was thrown. Not only had Severus left Spinner’s End to help find a cure for Minerva, he was also back at Hogwarts. After all that time spent in New Mills, avoiding the wizarding world and holing himself up like a hermit, he was back in the public eye in a way she would never have anticipated. She wondered what it all meant." 
I'll tell you what it all means, little sister. It means you jumped the gun when you went off in a huff! You never worried about any one elses pain but your own, including the man you claimed to love.
I am sorry to be so bitter toward her for your sake. I don't blame the story or think the story is lame. I'm just pissed off at Hermione, still have a migrain and should be in bed, because I have to go to work tomorrow, but I can't stop reading your story.
Please forgive me for not spell checking.
Goodbye Severus???? Hermione stared up into his face. It shocked her to realise that she didn’t truly know the man before her. He was more complex and insecure than she had ever imagined, and he wouldn’t change, not ever.
She's his first relationship in his entire life and he is her first love. How does she know he won't change, ever.( 
Know-it- All) I will say, OK he is being a really big prick, a huge bastard and a fuck up. He has really hurt you with this.
However, he already has changed by having his first relationship this late in his life.
She knows she is the first person he has ever trusted like, this doesn't she?
I know she's hurt and doesn't think he really loves her right now, but I dont feel like she was ever really committed to a long term relationship with him. He was handy and helped her get over the war. I guess she was on a war just rebound.
She sure made up her mind rather abruptly!
Only a few momments ago she was declairing her deep love for him. Maybe what she should really say is, "he's just too complex and insecure for her to waste any more of her time on."
Is she sweet little Hermione who just accepts him as he is, loving him so unconditionally. Or, is she just not willing to take the time to work on a relationsip with Severus Snape. She doesn't seemed to have warned him that this, not going places with her, was becoming a deal breaker for her.
Has she ever brought up the fact that it bothers her that he never says he love her?
This is his first relationship in his entire life for a reason. Of course, she is young and after all he isn't her husband, he's just a "boyfriend".
I don't know what she means though, when she says she's shocked and doesn't know this man.
He's been a mean tempered git since the first time she met him when she was 11, and she just now realized he has a tendancy to jump to the worst possible conclusions when he's worreid or up set, and that he has serious anger management problems?
If she truly loves him as much as she says, I think she should have told him what the deal breakers were and given him a chance to prove himself.
He's already pissed off right now, as it is. So she can tell him what needs to happen if he wants to keep her then leave him to stew and think about how much he is willing to do to keep her.
I've been with the same man three times the number of years I was single or 3 times longer than I was alive when we first got together. You don't get to have a lifetime mate unless you give people a chance to work on their issues before you bail for good. I don't think Hermione had ever intended to spend her entire life with Severus.
After 5 years, I think she would have pressed him a little harder to work things out sooner.
Snape is being a real shit. Yes he just falsly accussed her. However, ‘I understand, witch,’ he whispered. ‘I wouldn’t want to stay with me either.’ Is this the hint of the century or what? He can't imagine why she had wanted to be with him in the first place. From chapt. 11-'I missed you, you know. After you “died.”’ Hermione made quotation marks with her free hand and looked into his face. ‘I had no idea you meant so much to me, until I thought you were gone forever.’
She was looking at him with expectation. Severus shrugged.
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Hermione,’ he sighed. ‘Whatever you see in me is misguided. I have nothing to offer.’
This is so sad.
I'm sorry for not keeping up on my reviews for each chapter, but I've had a migraine all weekend. I have a lot of thoughts and feelings about all that I've read so far. I hope they work this out.
about time! I should have been in bed two hours ago but I couldn't leave it on such a sad note.
This isn't a good sign guys.
Poor Severus. She didn't give him much of a choice without him rejecting her outright. But he doesn't have a chance in hell of coming away unscathed. Will it be worth it? I hope Hermione doesn't let me down. She on a war rebound which is worse than a Ronnald Weasely rebound. She says she needs him. Does she know what she's asking from him? I really don't think so. If he's in for a penny, he's in for a pound. Severus Snape does nothing in the middle. I hope Hermione see's that.
I'm very happy she has given Severus a garden. I hope she isn't leading him on. She seems very young here. I know that in a story this long there are usually some bumps in the road to love, but I never look forward to them. The story is sweet and filling me with anticipation of them becoming a couple.
I know Snape will keep her secret. And I think Snape is going to get a friend. Will it turn into a romance or will it bite him in the butt just like he probably expects it to?
I hope Hermione is trying to figure out how to get Snape back as much as he's trying to get her back.
I assume Severus will keep Hermione's secret. It's not Snepelike to gossip. But he'll think about what Minerva has said and will feel duty bound to check on "the girl". I wonder who will contact who first. I am also assuming that Hermione isn't using her wand so that she can't be traced back to this place by the Ministry knowing her wand has been used. When she uses it in Diagon Alley doing little insignificant spells, is just no one paying attention because of where the magic is being cast and mainly only notice it when it's in a Muggle area? Could the Ministry have found Hermione, Harry and Ron the last year of the war by following thier wands? 