Nineteen
Chapter 20 of 50
neelixSeverus felt ridiculous. He was Disillusioned and standing in a dark corner of the drawing room of Claridge's hotel, watching Hermione from a distance. She wasn't aware of his presence and probably thought he was still at home in front of the TV.
She had left three hours earlier wearing a floor length, midnight blue satin evening gown, and her hair coiled beautifully around her head and studded with small flowers. A simple diamond pendant necklace hung between her breasts, and she looked more stunning than Severus had ever seen her. But he had said nothing, just wished her a good night as she stepped through the Floo, a sad smile on her face as she disappeared. He couldn't bear the thought of her looking so beautiful and not being on his arm, but rather than arrive in style to whisk her off her feet as he would have liked to have done, he had followed her and skulked in furtively, then hid.
It would have been better for both of them if he had just accompanied her in the first place, because he could see that although Hermione gave the impression of having a good time, her smile was a little false, and she glanced often at her wrist watch in the manner of someone wishing the night would end. His own situation was even more depressing, having to stand and watch as she danced with other men, seeing the delight on their faces as they held her in their arms and caressed her curves through her dress. He just wanted the whole evening to get to the damn point.
***
Hermione was giddy from being swung back and forth by a line of non-descript wizards, most of whom she only recognised from having lunch in the Ministry canteen. The whole evening seemed to be dragging on, and it had been an ordeal from start to finish, not helped by the fact that most people had arrived with their significant others, or at least amongst a group of friends. The only other people that Hermione knew were Harry and Ginny, but the last thing she needed was to be a gooseberry. Although she put her glass of champagne on their table, she had no intention of pretending all was rosy in that garden.
With a sigh, Hermione smiled politely at her last dance partner as the music finally ended, and with relief she made her way back to her table, lifting her champagne and sipping slowly as all eyes were drawn to the spotlighted stage. With a small smile, Hermione watched as Kingsley walked gracefully to the centre of the stage, and then listened intently as he pontificated about advances in the field of Spells and Charms, the need for further research. He expressed his appreciation that everyone had turned out to support the people who were part of such an important area for the future defence of the wider wizarding community. Hermione ruminated on this, feeling slightly unsettled that even now all of her work seemed to be focussed on the past. They would never be allowed to forget Voldemort, no matter how hard they tried.
Hermione felt her stomach lurch as she realised it was time for the award to be announced. Despite being convinced that the other candidates were far more worthy, it didn't stop her hoping that her name would be announced. Her mouth went dry as Kingsley introduced Alwyn Proctor Prewitt, an aging Lecturer whose father had first introduced the award many moons ago. He walked excruciatingly slowly, and people started to shuffle their feet in anticipation as they watched the old man walk to where Kingsley stood. The envelope in his hand shook, and Kingsley took it from him and shook his hand firmly, making the older wizard wobble. Hermione fought the urge to laugh out loud, and suddenly she wished that she had Severus with her to share the moment, whether she won or not. She was sure the absurdity of the situation would have amused him to no end.
There was silence in the room, and Hermione scanned the faces of the other candidates briefly. The American candidate seemed the most confident, flashing a huge, toothy grin when she caught her eye. Hermione bit her lip nervously, and Alwyn Proctor Prewitt started to talk in a deep, rumbling voice that carried around the whole room and belied his frail appearance.
'The recipient of the award has been chosen because of their work ethic and exceptional commitment to the field. Rarely has such an individual had such an outstanding impact at such an early stage in their career. The Proctor Prewitt Foundation believes that the bursary will not only progress the work of this deserving winner, but it will also benefit the whole wizarding community.'
Proctor Prewitt paused for a moment, and a light ripple of applause went through the crowd. Hermione relaxed, certain that the person he was referring to couldn't possibly be her, and she caught Harry's eye and shrugged slightly. Harry arched his eyebrows at her and smirked knowingly, but Hermione had no time to consider what he meant by it, because Alwyn Proctor Prewitt was talking again.
'Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me profound pleasure to present the Proctor Prewitt Award for Innovative Spell Research to... Doctor Hermione Granger.'
The old man stood a little straighter, and his deep blue eyes met Hermione's warmly as he beckoned her towards him. A cheer went up around her, and she walked towards the stage in a state of shock and disbelief.
'Congratulations, Dr. Granger, very well done indeed,' Proctor Prewitt said quietly as Hermione bent down to shake his hand. She had to pause for a moment to process that he was actually referring to her as 'Doctor,' but she smiled at him as she lifted a small, onyx statue of a wand casting a spell and turned to face the crowd that was still applauding her. After a few moments, they went silent again, their upturned faces smiling at her beatifically.
She knew she was expected to say something, but for the life of her she had no idea what, and she looked around the room desperately until a movement in the corner of the room caught her eye. Severus removed his Disillusionment charm and raised his hand to her slightly to let her know he was there, and Hermione beamed at him and nodded discreetly as he replaced the charm and slid back into the shadows. With a surge of confidence, Hermione spoke a few words of thanks, complimented her fellow candidates and assured the Ministry dignitaries that her bursary would be put to very good use.
After another round of applause, Hermione left the stage and was immediately surrounded by well wishers and sycophants alike. She craned her neck to catch a glimpse of the corner where Severus was standing, but she was whisked off for photographs and more champagne before she had a chance to say, 'Thanks, but I'm going home now.'
***
Severus felt full of pride as he watched Hermione being hustled away. He hadn't intended to reveal himself, but he had seen the panic in her face. It had intrigued him to observe her interactions with her colleagues, not least of which Potter, who was obviously still not in her good books. Professional to the 'nth degree, Hermione seemed to have no friends in her workplace, and he wondered if this made her lonely at all. Their private time was always so full of each other, and Severus had never had much time or need for other people, but Hermione had always had friends at school, and he wondered why she seemed to have none now. He waited for a few more moments, but when it became clear that Hermione wouldn't be coming back to the room any time soon, Severus decided to return home and wait for her there.
***
Hermione was exhausted by the time she returned to Hilltop Cottage. The Cushioning Charm on her shoes had worked its magic, thank goodness, but she was very glad to slip them off as she wandered into the kitchen and flicked the switch of the kettle.
After the photographs, people wanting to discuss future projects or just be within her aura had besieged her, and it had taken her quite a time to extract herself. It hadn't all been a complete waste of time, though. The American candidate, Alicia Maines, had approached her, and much to Hermione's excitement, they shared the same interest in Spell work. In addition, Alicia had access to the Proctor Prewitt library and research facility within her home area and had made her a lucrative and very tempting offer for her to study there for a six-month period.
Hermione waited for the kettle to boil and noticed Severus walking towards her out of the corner of her eye. Smiling widely, she walked into his open arms and inhaled his scent deeply, burying her nose into his shirt.
'Congratulations, Doctor Granger,' he murmured into her hair.
Hermione pulled away slowly and smiled softly at him. 'I can't quite believe it, you know. Thank you for coming in the end.'
Severus shrugged and started to make tea. 'I wanted to see you win,' he said quietly.
'Forget the tea, Severus,' Hermione said meaningfully, holding her hand out to him. 'Just come to bed.'
Severus raised his eyes to hers and saw a familiar glint in her gaze. He took her hand softly and allowed her to lead him upstairs.
***
Afterward, when Severus had drifted off to sleep, Hermione curled her body around him and slipped her arms tightly around his waist, feeling his body rise and fall with each breath. She closed her eyes and forced herself to remember the feel of him beneath her cheek as wet tears started to drip down her face.
She had no idea why she felt emotional, but something in her world had shifted this night, and it didn't feel one bit comfortable.
A/N: Just wanted to add this apology. There will be a delay in posting the next chapters while I look for a new Beta. Please hang in there!
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Latest 25 Reviews for Hilltop Cottage
734 Reviews | 7.3/10 Average
This was such a great read, thanks for sharing! I was especially happy to see that Minerva recovered well enough to be able to attend Severus' and Hermione's wedding. It just wouldn't have been the same without her. And Donovan, you just know that boy is going to be such a heartbreaker. Well done!
God what a beautiful beginning. I got chills when I read the first few sentences of this chapter. It reminded me of a 19th century British novel.... something from Hardy. I love your writing. There are naughty bits that are fun to read, but you have a charming prose that just strikes me sometimes. So, I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoy your writing. THANK YOU!
Response from neelix (Author of Hilltop Cottage)
To be compared to Hardy made me smile :) You're very kind,but more than that I'm so happy you like the,story :)
For such inteligent people, in the love department they really had lower grades...so quick to think badly of one another, especialy Severus, but Hermione had her moments, too.
I was so glad when they finally learned and began to trust each other!!!
It was an interesting journey. Thank you.
Great story :) Excellent job with the buildup, realistic angst scenes, and a happy ending. I thoroughly enjoyed it!
WTF!! Why is she letting Alicia plant stupid doubts in her mind? Alicia doesn't even know Severus! And Severus was obviously not too happy with Alicia. For Merlin's sake! What the hell is the matter with Hermione?? When did she become so gullible and wishy washy? This isn't the Hermione who stood up to Malfoy and punched him in the face! She needs to take a pill or something.
And there are a hell of a lot of worse things in the world than a man who stands by you as the mother of his child!!! Get over the Cinderella complex Herms. 
OK! What the Fuck is wrong with Severus now? These aren't weak minded individuals. Snape is a freaking spy who fooled Voldemort for like 20 year, for gods sake! He should be able to see a BSer from a mile away! These two are really getting on my freaking left nerve. Doesn't Mister Ligilimens remember being inside Hermone's head? I don't know how much more of their BS I can stand. Get over yourselves Hermione and Severus! You two are freaking making me want to poke my damned eyes out!!!
Oooooh, I never would have thought! Severus will put her in her place. There's a reason Hermione is his first and only relationship. I'm sure Alicia isn't the first woman to come on to the Potion's Master. 
Too bad for Hermione, though. Betrayed by a friend. Hopefully if Alicia realizes tonight that they are engaged to be married she will back off, for Hermione's sake. I can't imagine she would think she had a chance with Severus if he want's to brush her off. He's a master at putting people in their place.
I'm looking forward to that if it becomes necessary.
I just hope this doesn't interfere with Minerva's cure.
Thank you, thank you, thank you, neelix! 
It was about time these two became a family. I'm so glad Hermione realizes she should not have left him. I will forgive her for breaking Severus' heart because of her youth and immaturity.
Now that she's a grown woman, she hopefully has her priorities straight. She can still be Dr. Granger, but she should keep it in prospective. Now, what about dear Minerva?
Severus wouldn't be the first man to change his ways once a father. If I was Severus though, like you said in the story, he needs to be sure she is committed to making this work and not leaving again when she feels hurt. Obviously she has no idea how she nearly killed him the first time she left him. By the same token, Hermione wouldn't be the first woman to grow up and make a committment to see the rough spots through rather than leave when things got rocky after having a child together. Everything changes when a couple says, you are stuck with me for the rest of our lives. How do you want to do the next 60 years? The hard way or the easy way? Make your choice.
Hopefully, she has seen that if you leave, you just change the problems you have for new ones. Unless there is physical abuse, infedelity or addiction, I think most things can be worked out. The 4 things just mentioned would be deal breakers for me. I hope they are happy together now. That's what stories are for. The happily ever after.
Please!!! It's not my place to say???? For God's sake! Let drag out the pain as long as possible shall we? Intereasting the penny dropped and Severus knew why he hadn't got her letter. Luna had told her but I guess she wasn't listening. I give up! Snapes blaming himself for being a jerk but she isn't blaming herself for anything at all. She didn't do anything wrong.
"What- an- idiot!" Hermione. How long did it take you to realize he didn't know.
I'm going back to Hermione's visit to St. Mungo's. Is she that thick? Did she hear Luna say he didn't get her letter, or at least take the hint that he may not have gotten her letter, the same as Minerva, and that she was wrong? Now she has a chance to do something about it and it doesn't seemed to have crossed her mind.
Poor Severus. I don't remember reading any stories where I liked Severus and thought Hermione was the idiot. Good original plot, just uncomfortable.
She didn't want to give up the parties and her work for Severus, but she has because she had his baby. Now, she's just lonely while giving them up. And it was all unecessry. He jumping to the conclusion that she left him for someone else, and she to he conclusion that he couldn't change.
You never even gave him a second chance to know he was wrong. Was it worth it Hermione, in the scope of things?
Did you think you were going to find someone else who understood you better and loved you more?
You could have been pregnant while with Severus and had a baby together.
There needs to be a smiley for="Self Absorbed!"
I'll think about it????
I had written a novel sized review after the last chapter but I hit one wrong button and lost it. Damn!!! I think I spent an hour and a half going back and researching the story so that I could review all the chapters I'd missed at the same time.
She needed to put chapter 14 in a pensive.
As for this
"Hermione was thrown. Not only had Severus left Spinner’s End to help find a cure for Minerva, he was also back at Hogwarts. After all that time spent in New Mills, avoiding the wizarding world and holing himself up like a hermit, he was back in the public eye in a way she would never have anticipated. She wondered what it all meant." 
I'll tell you what it all means, little sister. It means you jumped the gun when you went off in a huff! You never worried about any one elses pain but your own, including the man you claimed to love.
I am sorry to be so bitter toward her for your sake. I don't blame the story or think the story is lame. I'm just pissed off at Hermione, still have a migrain and should be in bed, because I have to go to work tomorrow, but I can't stop reading your story.
Please forgive me for not spell checking.
Goodbye Severus???? Hermione stared up into his face. It shocked her to realise that she didn’t truly know the man before her. He was more complex and insecure than she had ever imagined, and he wouldn’t change, not ever.
She's his first relationship in his entire life and he is her first love. How does she know he won't change, ever.( 
Know-it- All) I will say, OK he is being a really big prick, a huge bastard and a fuck up. He has really hurt you with this.
However, he already has changed by having his first relationship this late in his life.
She knows she is the first person he has ever trusted like, this doesn't she?
I know she's hurt and doesn't think he really loves her right now, but I dont feel like she was ever really committed to a long term relationship with him. He was handy and helped her get over the war. I guess she was on a war just rebound.
She sure made up her mind rather abruptly!
Only a few momments ago she was declairing her deep love for him. Maybe what she should really say is, "he's just too complex and insecure for her to waste any more of her time on."
Is she sweet little Hermione who just accepts him as he is, loving him so unconditionally. Or, is she just not willing to take the time to work on a relationsip with Severus Snape. She doesn't seemed to have warned him that this, not going places with her, was becoming a deal breaker for her.
Has she ever brought up the fact that it bothers her that he never says he love her?
This is his first relationship in his entire life for a reason. Of course, she is young and after all he isn't her husband, he's just a "boyfriend".
I don't know what she means though, when she says she's shocked and doesn't know this man.
He's been a mean tempered git since the first time she met him when she was 11, and she just now realized he has a tendancy to jump to the worst possible conclusions when he's worreid or up set, and that he has serious anger management problems?
If she truly loves him as much as she says, I think she should have told him what the deal breakers were and given him a chance to prove himself.
He's already pissed off right now, as it is. So she can tell him what needs to happen if he wants to keep her then leave him to stew and think about how much he is willing to do to keep her.
I've been with the same man three times the number of years I was single or 3 times longer than I was alive when we first got together. You don't get to have a lifetime mate unless you give people a chance to work on their issues before you bail for good. I don't think Hermione had ever intended to spend her entire life with Severus.
After 5 years, I think she would have pressed him a little harder to work things out sooner.
Snape is being a real shit. Yes he just falsly accussed her. However, ‘I understand, witch,’ he whispered. ‘I wouldn’t want to stay with me either.’ Is this the hint of the century or what? He can't imagine why she had wanted to be with him in the first place. From chapt. 11-'I missed you, you know. After you “died.”’ Hermione made quotation marks with her free hand and looked into his face. ‘I had no idea you meant so much to me, until I thought you were gone forever.’
She was looking at him with expectation. Severus shrugged.
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Hermione,’ he sighed. ‘Whatever you see in me is misguided. I have nothing to offer.’
This is so sad.
I'm sorry for not keeping up on my reviews for each chapter, but I've had a migraine all weekend. I have a lot of thoughts and feelings about all that I've read so far. I hope they work this out.
about time! I should have been in bed two hours ago but I couldn't leave it on such a sad note.
This isn't a good sign guys.
Poor Severus. She didn't give him much of a choice without him rejecting her outright. But he doesn't have a chance in hell of coming away unscathed. Will it be worth it? I hope Hermione doesn't let me down. She on a war rebound which is worse than a Ronnald Weasely rebound. She says she needs him. Does she know what she's asking from him? I really don't think so. If he's in for a penny, he's in for a pound. Severus Snape does nothing in the middle. I hope Hermione see's that.
I'm very happy she has given Severus a garden. I hope she isn't leading him on. She seems very young here. I know that in a story this long there are usually some bumps in the road to love, but I never look forward to them. The story is sweet and filling me with anticipation of them becoming a couple.
I know Snape will keep her secret. And I think Snape is going to get a friend. Will it turn into a romance or will it bite him in the butt just like he probably expects it to?
I hope Hermione is trying to figure out how to get Snape back as much as he's trying to get her back.
I assume Severus will keep Hermione's secret. It's not Snepelike to gossip. But he'll think about what Minerva has said and will feel duty bound to check on "the girl". I wonder who will contact who first. I am also assuming that Hermione isn't using her wand so that she can't be traced back to this place by the Ministry knowing her wand has been used. When she uses it in Diagon Alley doing little insignificant spells, is just no one paying attention because of where the magic is being cast and mainly only notice it when it's in a Muggle area? Could the Ministry have found Hermione, Harry and Ron the last year of the war by following thier wands? 