Longing
livvy6505 Reviews | 6.88/10 (505 Ratings, 0 Likes, 387 Favorites )
Severus fails a test for his allegiance to Voldemort. The fallout from one night will change everything.
Start ReadingChapters (18)
About livvy6
Author
livvy6
Member Since 2007 | 17 Stories | Favorited by 655 | 625 Reviews Written | 6,131 Review Responses
I am a grateful fan of Ms. Rowling and of her overwhelming Byronic Character, Severus Snape! Please check out the first chapters of each fic (except for "How Can I Tell You," which is on Chapter 2) to see pictures of the Heroines.
Admins' Note: Livvy6 died suddenly on February 22, 2012, leaving behind her husband, six-year-old daughter, and seventeen stories well-loved by the TPP community. All who knew her—including those in Harry Potter fandom and all of us, here—are richer for having known her.
Requiescat in pace, Livvy. Always.
Reviews for Longing
This story is inspiring. It really embodies the sense of worthlessness thousands of young girls feel today. One of my best friends has an eating disorder and although the symptoms are not the same, I know she feels exactly how Hermione does. Thank you for writing this story. Hopefully it will show people how drastically their remarks affect others. Keep it up! It's amazing!-Adriana
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thank you! It is so hard when someone you love is hellbent on hurtig themselves. It is devestating.I'm glad this fic is touching your heart.Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thank you! It is so hard when someone you love is hellbent on hurtig themselves. It is devestating.I'm glad this fic is touching your heart.Thanks!Livvy
Oh God Livvy! Your story is so moving. Hermione's situation reminds me so much of my teen years, it makes me cry...for her, for myself, and for the countless others who cut to ease the pain.Personally, I wasn't a habitual cutter, just an extreme stress cutter (I internalized alot, so for me the release felt greater). Looking back on everything I can see now that had I cut at every instance of shame, humiliation, or cruelty, I most certainly wouldn't have made it past my Junior (Sixth) year of high school. Thank God I had the help of a good friend and mentor who got me through the worst of it, and I can say that I no longer cut for any reason.I appreciate you so much for writing such a compelling story on such a difficult and sensitive topic. I anxiously await the chapters on Hermione's much needed help and how Severus' cruelty will come back to hit him square in the face.Excellent, as always!
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Oh, yes, it will hit him square in the face, as you say and he will have to work very hard to convince Hermione of his love for her. Ultimately though, Hermione will have to make that decision that she is worth more and stop letting other people's words dictate how she will feel about herself.Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Oh, yes, it will hit him square in the face, as you say and he will have to work very hard to convince Hermione of his love for her. Ultimately though, Hermione will have to make that decision that she is worth more and stop letting other people's words dictate how she will feel about herself.Thanks!Livvy
I seriously ache for Hermione in this. She has a long emotional journey ahead of her. And Snape's reaction makes slightly more sense now. He is by no means a kind man. If he found himself reacting in a way that disgusted him or was opposed to that honour that he has so deeply ingrained in him (as you said), then I can see him lashing out cruelly. Once he realizes what he is doing to her though... I hope he helps her. He needs to.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Oh, he will. There will be massive pride-swallowing and crow-eating. Hermione won't make it all easy for him either. He's going to actually have to work at his groveling. He-he!Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Oh, he will. There will be massive pride-swallowing and crow-eating. Hermione won't make it all easy for him either. He's going to actually have to work at his groveling. He-he!Thanks!Livvy
Livvy this is amazing, but i expect it to be after Bookends.
I'm glad i was right about Severus feeling something for her. And they all find out about her cutting in the next chapter you say? I wonder how Severus is going to react, and if he is the one to heal her, but will he still find her attractive after all those cuts. So many questions! Please update soon.x.x
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Oh, he is going to be very upset. Very upset. However, not at her. And he truly loves her. No scars will affect his feelings, however, he will heal her and there won't be scars. At least not this time.Thanks for all your compliments!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Oh, he is going to be very upset. Very upset. However, not at her. And he truly loves her. No scars will affect his feelings, however, he will heal her and there won't be scars. At least not this time.Thanks for all your compliments!Livvy
Livvy, you've written a very compelling story, thank you. When you are not self confident, it's hard to learn confidence in yourself with out some help. Some of the people who appear the most self confident are the least confident in them selves. Hopefully, help will soon be on the way.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
That is so true! Hermione will get help. Dumbledore will arange for that. Hermione will also be monitered secretly. It's going to be a difficult process though.Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
That is so true! Hermione will get help. Dumbledore will arange for that. Hermione will also be monitered secretly. It's going to be a difficult process though.Thanks!Livvy
I can't say how much your descriptions of her feelings and anxieties ring true. It is something that one becomes used to, and so it isn't thought of as out of the ordinary. For the first time, I'm seeing how these thoughts appear to others. Thanks! It was great to have Snape's POV as well. It brings a bit of sympathy to his character. Not much, but it is nice to see he's not had the easiest time of it either. Wonderful job with such a difficult topic.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thank you! you'll get more of Snape's POV as the story continues.Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thank you! you'll get more of Snape's POV as the story continues.Thanks!Livvy
Yikes! Your imagery is very powerful and illustrates her pain so eloquently. I can just imagine Severus's pain when he sees the effect his words had on her - You made the association between the sharpness of his tounge marking her soul as surely as the was razor marking her skin. It will be so hard to come back to a loving relationship from this, if at all, because I assume her skin will have scars and be a permanant reminder of these events, much less the emotional healing that will be needed. I will be interested to see how the other people around her deal with this fact - it can certainly be a confronting time leading to a myriad of feelings such as hurt, bewilderment and anger: I assume the boys will have a difficult time dealing with it?The sad fact is that this is all too common in our society.Once again fantastic writing - and by the way you are 'evil' *Shakes head* - having a cliffie at the end like that! But I suppose you have some redeemable qualities - The next chapter is in the queue!Cheers
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
lol! I know it was evil leaving you all hanging like that, but the next chapter will be all about everyone finding out about Hermione's cutting-including Snape.Thanks for reviewing!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
lol! I know it was evil leaving you all hanging like that, but the next chapter will be all about everyone finding out about Hermione's cutting-including Snape.Thanks for reviewing!Livvy
Kudos to Poppy for willing to get involved.Oh, Severus. I can't imagine how he's going to feel when he see's his heartless words carved on her body.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
It is going to be huge. He will be very upset over it. Of course in pure Snape-like style. Expect a lot of snarling and shouting :)Thanks!LivvyP.S. Not at Hermione, but those around her.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
It is going to be huge. He will be very upset over it. Of course in pure Snape-like style. Expect a lot of snarling and shouting :)Thanks!LivvyP.S. Not at Hermione, but those around her.
Dear God, they are both so lost. Amazingly they carry joint recriminations. She thinks herself ugly and unloveable because he says it is so... and he would never lie. He know though he is lying to himself I only wish she did.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Believe me, this will all come out and Snape will have a lot of confessing to do to Hermione. It's not going to be easy.Thanks,Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Believe me, this will all come out and Snape will have a lot of confessing to do to Hermione. It's not going to be easy.Thanks,Livvy
Thankfully, I believe that Hermione's secret is about to be discovered. We can only hope. Her condition has become precarious, and I worry that without intervention, she will cause herself irreparable harm.Great chapter. Well written!Beth
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thanks, Beth! Yes, it's all going to come out and Dumbledore will all over this, getting someone from the Ministry to counsel her and something else I can't tell yet. She will be highly monitored. Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thanks, Beth! Yes, it's all going to come out and Dumbledore will all over this, getting someone from the Ministry to counsel her and something else I can't tell yet. She will be highly monitored. Thanks!Livvy
OMG! Her decision to self-mutilate is the clearest example you could have given to describe the depths of Hermione's despair. Please let someone find her, please let someone help her.Severus will have a difficult time coming to terms with his part in Hermione's dissolution into this pit of self-loathing in which his brightest student now finds herself.This is a very well written chapter about a very disturbing decision by Miss Granger.Beth
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thanks Beth! Yes, Severus will have a lot of guilt to deal with and he will have to work hard to prove to her that he never meant the things he said. BTW, there is a reason why he said those things. It really hurt him to say them and to be so cold and creul.Thanks for reviewing,Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thanks Beth! Yes, Severus will have a lot of guilt to deal with and he will have to work hard to prove to her that he never meant the things he said. BTW, there is a reason why he said those things. It really hurt him to say them and to be so cold and creul.Thanks for reviewing,Livvy
Snape's position as both a Death Eater and a spy for the Order of the Phoenix requires so much duplicity that it's a wonder he can remember who he is from one day to the next. And it is equally disconcerting for those who depend on his excelling at both.This is a very good beginning to what I believe will be one hell of a good read! Great start... I'm hooked!Beth
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Great! I'm glad you are liking it. I hope you continue to like where I take them!Thank you!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Great! I'm glad you are liking it. I hope you continue to like where I take them!Thank you!Livvy
It's a great story, leaving tears in my eyes, I look forward to reading more 
Pyro
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
I'm glad you are liking this fic. Next chapter is in the queue!Thank you!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
I'm glad you are liking this fic. Next chapter is in the queue!Thank you!Livvy
This is so sad. But it can't get any worse, can it? So some major healing is required next, right? I'm looking forward to it!!!! gab
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Yes, unfortunately it will, I won't lie to you. However, it will only serve to finally break Snape's pride and have him completely devoted to proving to Hermione everything he said was a lie. It will take time, though.Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Yes, unfortunately it will, I won't lie to you. However, it will only serve to finally break Snape's pride and have him completely devoted to proving to Hermione everything he said was a lie. It will take time, though.Thanks!Livvy
Good god, this is horrifying. It's an excellent, well-written story, but holy fuck Hermione!Anxiously awaiting more.... damned evil cliffies.PajamaPants's response: Oh, and I hope, at the very least, that Severus vomits copiously when he realizes the impact of his actions.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
When it hits him there will be begging and pleading, lots of guilt and tears - I think I wrote tears. And of course multiple times of saying how wrong he was. Big stuff for Severus Snape!Thanks,Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
When it hits him there will be begging and pleading, lots of guilt and tears - I think I wrote tears. And of course multiple times of saying how wrong he was. Big stuff for Severus Snape!Thanks,Livvy
Okay, now we know why he was such an ass. I still don't see how he will be much help to her. Even if he quits being so cruel, he won't be able to alter the way she sees herself overnight.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
That's right. One lashing out at a person doesn't start this kind of self-punishment. It had been a long time coming. What he did was just the final straw. He shall learn to see her life as she does, but it will be up to Hermione to change how she sees herself, regardless of what anyone thinks of her. It won't be an overnight process for sure.Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
That's right. One lashing out at a person doesn't start this kind of self-punishment. It had been a long time coming. What he did was just the final straw. He shall learn to see her life as she does, but it will be up to Hermione to change how she sees herself, regardless of what anyone thinks of her. It won't be an overnight process for sure.Thanks!Livvy
i never understood the idea of self-mutilation before, but the way you have woven it into the story makes perfect sense. thanks so much and i look forward to the next chapter.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
I am glad you are being so open-minded about this. I hope you will continue to remained open minded and see where I take Hermione in this story.Thank you for reviewing!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
I am glad you are being so open-minded about this. I hope you will continue to remained open minded and see where I take Hermione in this story.Thank you for reviewing!Livvy
Nasty cliffie, what happened to Hermione? At least the headmaster isn't fooled by outside appearances. Hopefully Hermione will be getting help soon.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
She will and more things will be revealed in the process. Next chapter is in the queue!Thanks,Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
She will and more things will be revealed in the process. Next chapter is in the queue!Thanks,Livvy
LOOOOVVVEEE this! I don't normally care for the dark fics, but this is so well-written and tantalizingly plotted I want more! Plese update soon! Also, I hope you're not cutting. I've done that myself, and I've been in recovery for over ten years.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
No, I used to, but I haven't in years. I turned from cutting to alcohol and became an alcoholic. I've been sober five years. I don't think of cutting anymore, but I remember the helplessness I felt and the hurt and pain.I am glad this fic is being so well received.Thanks for reviewing!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
No, I used to, but I haven't in years. I turned from cutting to alcohol and became an alcoholic. I've been sober five years. I don't think of cutting anymore, but I remember the helplessness I felt and the hurt and pain.I am glad this fic is being so well received.Thanks for reviewing!Livvy
great chapter, I can't believe the things Snape is saying, but then again I can because he's such a git at times. I can't wait for the next chapter. I love this story. by the way, that was a great authors note.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thanks, I felt I need to clarify some things for those who were confused or couldn't understand why Hermione was hurting herself.THe next chapter will give a lot of insight into Severus' mind and motives. I hope you like it.Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thanks, I felt I need to clarify some things for those who were confused or couldn't understand why Hermione was hurting herself.THe next chapter will give a lot of insight into Severus' mind and motives. I hope you like it.Thanks!Livvy
Wow, I've always thought Poppy was an idiot for not noticing what was going on with Harry, or deliberately ignoring it, and this has just confirmed it. She should have done an examination.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Harry? or you mean Hermione? Dumbledore just didn't want any problems, like always, he just doesn't like to talk about things, keep it hidden. It will all come to bite them in the ass later.Thanks,Livvy
Response from blue artemis (Reviewer)
I meant Harry (in canon) which you support with the way this was handled for poor Hermione here in your story.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Harry? or you mean Hermione? Dumbledore just didn't want any problems, like always, he just doesn't like to talk about things, keep it hidden. It will all come to bite them in the ass later.Thanks,Livvy
Response from blue artemis (Reviewer)
I meant Harry (in canon) which you support with the way this was handled for poor Hermione here in your story.
This is still difficult to read but you are writing this difficult subject with great compassion and understanding that's it is well worth the difficulty. This I think will turn out to be an original and outstanding story, it's already well on it's way. Many, many thanks
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thank you so much! I am so glad it has been received so well. I hope it contiues!Thanks,Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thank you so much! I am so glad it has been received so well. I hope it contiues!Thanks,Livvy
Still hangin in! I truly do love this story and can truly understand what she's going through. Although I do want to kick Severus in the crotch for being an ass. I know he's got his own drama going on and that's why he's being this way. It's just so frustrating! Anyways, awesome chapter and I can't wait for #4! Cheers! ~
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
The next chapter is going to be a big one. We're going to see what up with Severus and more with Hermione's descent into self-destruction.Yes, Severus is being a little prick who needs to be lambasted. There will be someone who will really sock it to him good too!Thanks,Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
The next chapter is going to be a big one. We're going to see what up with Severus and more with Hermione's descent into self-destruction.Yes, Severus is being a little prick who needs to be lambasted. There will be someone who will really sock it to him good too!Thanks,Livvy
English is not my native lanuage, amd thought I generally check what I write it has occure some mistaces when I write in haste. Your last chapter arause some strong emotion in me and I put ewerything in front without check . I try to be more exact in future . In this chapter ,I find deterent cognition that Hermione pay no attantion that she miss her first class. This is for me so wery significant and it shows how much she is lost her self.Hermione attention for apperance show the deepth of her love and obsession whith Snape. While Snape react the way he ussualy do,as he can not stop challange and insult her , and he is also jealous. Her reaction on Pepper-up poison is conserning because it shows just how serious her condition is.Can wait for her recovering.
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thank you for reviewing! Yes, her condition is getting worse, but her "secret" will be discovered in time for everyone to become aware of how hurt and disturbed she is.Thanks!Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Thank you for reviewing! Yes, her condition is getting worse, but her "secret" will be discovered in time for everyone to become aware of how hurt and disturbed she is.Thanks!Livvy
Hope someone discovers the cutting before it is too late
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Hermione will be found out and then everything will come out.Thanks,Livvy
Response from livvy6 (Author of Longing)
Hermione will be found out and then everything will come out.Thanks,Livvy