Chapter 8

A/N: This is a HUGE chapter, meaning a lot of things will change from here on out. I'm really excited to know your reactions and thoughts. Again, thanks to my fantastic beta, Shellsnapeluver, who has been a joy to work with!

***

Valentine's Day came with a feeling of dread in Severus' chest. He had been doing his part by keeping his eye on Miss Granger. She had seemed to be doing well. However, he had decided to not assume she would behave out of his sight, so he had ordered Misses Brown and Patil to keep him informed on her progress.

He had also kept a wide berth between Miss Weasley and himself. The fiery redhead had it out for him badly. Although she had not yet confronted him, a day never passed that she did not glare at him in furious rage. It continued to concern him.

The days that had led to Valentine's Day had been positively hellish. As it was every year, boys and girls were paring off, snogging in alcoves, trying to get a leg over. He had been constantly stumbling upon these couples. It had brought more than one hurtful memory of all that had been denied to him at that age. In the midst of it all, however, he realized just how much he had had enjoyed keeping his vigil over Hermione, especially as she had started spending more time alone in the library. He silently observed her, Disillusioned, so she would be none the wiser.

He had begun to notice that she was not sleeping well. The longer he watched her, the bolder he became, walking closer to her and looking deeply into her face. She had faint, dark circles under her tired eyes. He had wondered if she was sleeping at all. She had still tried to keep up her beauty regimen, but as Valentine's Day had grown closer, she had begun to hide away, neglecting herself. It had come as no surprise to him. After all, he had been of the same mean at her age. Why be around all the happiness that could never be yours? More than once he had found her sitting in a sofa chair, her arms wrapped around her legs, tucked up under her chin, looking out the window in the library at the couples walking outside. More than once, he had seen a tear slide down her face. How he had wished he could have collected them in a crystal phial; they were too precious to be spilled so easily and disregarded. Her suffering had started to become personal to him, and he felt it deep within him. He just wanted it all to stop and have the Hermione he knew was there somewhere hiding, back the way things used to be.

***

Snape sat eating dinner that Valentine's evening, before the older students were to pair off and go out to Hogsmeade for a special "romantic" evening. He observed a young Ravenclaw, Marcus Belby, approach Hermione. Snape watched her intently as her eyes darted around her. He knew this eye movement. It meant she was nervous and felt trapped. Keeping his eyes on her, he leaned over Lupin, and slammed his hand on the table to get Minerva's attention. Hermione suddenly shook her head and turned, running out of the hall. The Gryffindor table was up in arms. Weasley and his girlfriend, Miss Brown were yelling and shouting at Miss Weasley and Mr. Potter. Suddenly, Miss Weasley turned and started to screech at Mr. Belby and then turned and yelled at Miss Brown.

Finally, as things began to settle to a disgruntled murmur, Miss Brown's shrieking voice could be heard above everyone else's.

"How was I supposed to know he'd behave like a retarded mountain troll? He's supposed to be in Ravenclaw for Merlin's sake!"

At that, a couple of insulted Ravenclaws joined in the mêlée. Minerva and Filius went to sort out the argument before wands were drawn.

Out of the corner of his eye, Snape watched as the young Weasley girl slip out from the mass of the squabbling, stride up to the Head Table, and precede to scream at him.

"You will pay for this, Severus Snape!" she shouted as she pointed her wand at him. Just then, Harry, who had come out of nowhere, enfolded her from behind trying to stop her from hexing a teacher.

Not that she would have gotten far! Snape thought snarkily. He was actually amused by her little outburst.

He must have smirked, for she blasted Harry from her and stood her ground facing the Potions master. The hall was hushed. Snape stood cautiously. Lupin was poised, ready with his wand drawn to act at a moment's notice while Dumbledore remained curiously silent and still.

"What exactly do you think you are doing, Miss Weasley?" Snape whispered in a deadly voice.

She stuffed her wand in her robe pocket and bellowed at the Potions master, her voice reverberating off the walls off the quiet hall. "I will not waste my magic on you, you pathetic sod! You did this to her! You have all but destroyed her!" Her fists were balled up; the whites of her knuckles barely contained the fury she was holding back.

She turned to scream at Dumbledore. "Why do you keep him on here? He's a sadistic bastard! He's the reason she's mutilating herself!"

She fixed her enraged face back onto Snape. "She loved you! She only wanted you to love her in return! Why did you have to hurt her so badly?" She broke down sobbing as McGonagall marched up to the girl and grabbed a hold of her.

"Miss Weasley!" Professor McGonagall cried out as she shook her, "Contain yourself!"

Miss Weasley's eyes were huge and wild. "It's all my fault. I didn't mean to do it! I couldn't stop him. You don't understand...Tom is so powerful!" she choked out as she grasped on to her Head of house.

Horrified, Snape looked up at Dumbledore, who closed his eyes in resignation and glanced at Minerva, who was pale. Without another word, the older witch gathered Ginny and took her to the headmaster's office.

***

Ginny sat in the chair in front of Dumbledore's large, wooden desk. She held her head in her hand, sobbing. Dumbledore, McGonagall, Snape, Pomfrey, Lupin and Harry stood around her in disbelief and fear, waiting for her explanation. Dumbledore had sent Hagrid to find Hermione while Sprout and Flitwick stayed in the Great Hall with the other students.

Finally, Ginny's cries calmed, and she began talking as she held her arms around her protectively.

"It started my first year, you know, the year Tom possessed me. Since then, he's been coming into my dreams. I thought that was all it was, just dreams. For the longest time, I didn't even know it was he. At first, I dreamt about vague things, events in my day, just normal stuff. Then about a couple years ago, I was just having the most vivid dreams about Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Then the dreams really focused on Hermione. I thought I was losing my mind or falling in love with her because I was dreaming about her all the time! At first, it was just random things, snippets of personal conversations, but then I began dreaming about important things, like her induction into the Order and then things that she had she sworn me never to tell. Then about four months ago, Tom came in the form he had before when I was eleven...the sixteen-year-old boy. He reminded me of all the things we had shared together." She took a large breath of air and was slightly blushing.

"What sort of things did he say?" Lupin asked.

"He was asking me all about Hermione. I tried to fight him, but he said we were connected, he and I, and that I had given my will to him once before, and I couldn't stop him now, we were a part of each other. He said the only way he would release me was if I stopped resisting him and let him know everything he wanted from me. He said I had no choice! It was either this way, or he would do what he did to Bertha Jorkins seem like child's play." Her voice grew quiet at the end, and she started rocking herself.

She drew a ragged breath and continued. "He wanted to know if Hermione had a boyfriend or a lover. He said he knew that she was very powerful. I didn't want to tell him, I had promised!" She turned to Harry, "I never even told you about who Hermione loves!"

"Hermione in love?" Harry asked in confusion. Then he sighed in relief and said, "Oh, you mean that idiot Lockheart?" He laughed. "Gin, that was second-year, and she got over it," he said dismissively.

"No, Harry," she said sternly. She glanced around at everyone looking at her so intently and took a deep breath as she continued.

"Hermione had told me the day of the dueling club, when Professor Snape had disarmed Lockheart, that she thought about how powerful and intelligent Professor Snape was. And you know how highly she regards those things. She begged me to never breathe a word to anyone, and I never did!"

Ginny covertly glanced at Professor Snape. His face was impassive and emotionless.

"Then her fourth year came, and she was so excited about Krum. She really thought she had gotten over her crush on Professor Snape. The day he humiliated her in front of Draco and his friends, she had cried and cried for days over it. She tried so hard to put all her feelings into Krum, and by that time Ron was being such a prat, treating her like she wasn't even a girl, taking her for granted. She was so sick of it! She had been so happy Krum had asked her to the Yule Ball. Then, during her fifth year, she told me she had finally gotten the guts to tell Viktor that she felt she fancied him, and the way he treated her...he was such a bastard!"

"Miss Weasley!" Professor McGonagall scolded.

"Uh, Professor," Harry interrupted cautiously. "I know what he did, and that's honestly the kindest thing for her to say," he said uncomfortably.

"What did he do?" asked Dumbledore angrily.

Harry answered for Ginny. "He wrote her back saying, 'Sorry, but it was Karkaroff's idea for me to cozy up with you for the Tournament...you being so smart and all.' Then he said he already had a fiancée in Bulgaria. He said he had liked that she was 'safe,' that she had never fawned all over him like the others. But, he just didn't see her 'that way.'"

Ginny spoke up. "She was crushed. She had already been feeling so inadequate about her looks and how she hadn't even had a boyfriend yet. I knew how deluded she was! I took one look at Krum and knew she was just trying so hard to find a replacement for Professor Snape. So anyway, Tom kept popping up in my dreams and dragging all my memories of Hermione up to view. Hermione admitted she realized she had just transferred her feelings from Professor Snape to Krum because of how mean Professor Snape had been. But when we had all learned that he had been working as a spy for the Order, she said she could look past his meanness...which it was all an act, and she had decided to stop fighting her feelings. Soon after, she told me she thought she was falling in love with him and hoped one day he would notice her. That was why she was so keen on getting into the Order and helping Professor Snape. She wanted to prove she wasn't a silly, little girl anymore, but a grown-up witch."

During Ginny's story, everyone had taken turns looking at Snape to watch his reactions. At first, he had remained cool and detached. However, as the story grew more personal and heart wrenching...especially about Krum...his face had begun to blush furiously. As she continued, his nostrils were flared, and his eyes moved around the room as his body remained still as stone. After Ginny was through, he looked as if he were daring for anyone to question him. He was silent as the room waited for someone to say something. Ginny had hoped he would at least say something about being sorry or that he felt bad about the whole damn business, but he didn't, and her anger surged.

Dumbledore spoke to her. "Miss Weasley," he said. "Do you mean to tell me that this entire time, Tom has been aware of Professor Snape's true allegiances?"

Ginny was pale. "I think so," she whispered.

For the first time ever since he had taken the Dark Mark, Snape lost his composure in public, and he collapsed onto the chair next to him. He was positively green.

Ginny panicked. "I tried, I tried! I was constantly arguing with him to stop bothering me, to get out of my head! But he kept digging deeper into my brain, and he saw how much Hermione was talking about Snape, how much she was starting to love him, how deeply she felt for him. Then, it was over. It was all over. The dreams stopped. I thought it had all been just an aftershock. I mean, they were just dreams, right?" she asked weakly.

"Ginny!" Harry yelled as he bolted from his chair. "How can you sit there and tell us 'just a dream?' Don't you recall all the nightmarish dreams I had my fifth year? My God!"

Ginny opened her mouth and huge tears ran down her face. "But, Harry, you had been seeing visions and places you had never been before! I was just dreaming about things that were already in my head. No one was putting ideas in there for me to act or do a thing. It isn't the same! By the time Tom came and revealed himself, he told me if I told anyone, he would send all his Death Eaters to kill each member of my family! I knew he would too! He killed your parents, Harry, and he killed my uncles!"

The adults looked over at Snape. He was raging underneath and looked like he was about to implode.

"She was right," Snape said softly to himself.

"What, Severus?" asked Dumbledore.

"That night...Miss Granger told me that it had seemed as if it all had been a set-up, that my loyalties had already been questioned. That it was all...a test!" His hands began to shake, and his breathing became shallow. Madam Pomfrey rushed over to examine him. He silently shook his hand at her. He just needed to process the shock.

Filch burst in. "Headmaster! We found Miss Granger! Hagrid and I took her into the infirmary. He's with her there," he said breathlessly.

Dumbledore looked relieved. "Thank you, Argus. Madam Pomfrey, would you please check on Miss Granger, to make sure she is alright?"

"Certainly, Headmaster," she replied as she got up to leave.

Dumbledore turned back to Ginny. "Miss Weasley, what happened tonight in the Great Hall?" he asked calmly.

Ginny was rubbing her forehead as if struggling with a migraine. She gave a low groan of frustration before speaking. "It was all Lavender and Ron! They thought she just needed some attention to get her self-esteem back...a bloke asked her to the Valentine's Outing," she said angrily.

As she spoke, she became increasingly animated. Her tone grew furious with each word. "They got Marcus Belby! You know for a Ravenclaw he's rather thick! He told Hermione he had been noticing how pretty she was looking and wanted to take her to Hogsmeade with him as a date. She brushed him off, well, more as if she didn't believe him when he said she was pretty; she's been so down on herself. Then the git had the nerve to turn to Lavender and say, 'Hey, I thought she was a sure thing!' she recounted in a gruff, manly voice.

There were audible groans coming from everyone then.

"It was hell! Hermione lost it! She thought 'sure thing' meant that he was expecting her to sleep with him! She turned so pale, and her eyes were filling with tears, and she ran out of the hall. Then Ron and Lavender started yelling at Marcus. Then Pavarti, Harry, and I started yelling at Ron and Lavender for butting in where they shouldn't have. Then Lavender said that comment about Marcus acting like a troll, and some of his Ravenclaw buddies heard her and started to yelling at us!" she shouted.

Her face grew dark as she continued, not looking anyone in the eye as she spoke; her voice was no more than a whisper. "I was so mad. I was angry because I knew what had happened that night she had disappeared. The night I had found her in the shower, bleeding from the cutting, she had been delusional, losing blood in the shower like that...she had thought she was dying! I had thought she was too, and she had told me what had happened. We were freezing, sopping wet from sitting in that shower. She grabbed me by the front of my robes, pulled me close to her, and whispered everything to me!" She burst into tears, shaking her fists as she looked over at Snape and said, "I wish I were a grown witch! I'd hex your bollocks off, you vicious bat!" she swore.

"Miss Weasley!" Professor McGonagall shouted. "You will refrain from that type of language! Fifty points from Gryffindor! I don't care what you think of Professor Snape, you will show respect for your betters, young lady!"

Harry was shaking with rage as he stared at his girlfriend. "What in the name of Merlin has gotten into you?" Then he turned to Dumbledore and Professor Snape, his emerald eyes flashing dangerously. "I want to know what the bloody hell happened to Hermione! She's my best friend, and if Voldemort is behind all this, I have the right to know!" he thundered.

Snape hissed at the mention of the name of his master, but spoke up anyway and recounted the events of that night. The abduction, near rape, and the time spent hiding out at Andromeda Tonks' house...it all came out. Then, Snape confessed what he had said to Hermione without reservation. Minerva told them about the extent of Hermione's cutting and how Professor Snape had saved her life.

Harry had stood calmly until Snape told them all the hurtful comments he had said to Hermione. After that, he jumped up and went to attack the professor. Ginny screamed as Professor Lupin restrained Harry.

"You sick, sadistic prick!" Harry swore as he fought against Lupin grip.

Snape stood and hovered over the young wizard with a venomous glare. "What, Potter, going to tell me how you and Weasley never used her, never overlooked her? Has either of you even recognized she's not a 'mate,' but a young woman?" he hissed.

Harry stopped struggling and hung his head in shame. It was true. Hermione had always been neglected and overlooked by them. Lupin released him, and he sat down hard into one of the chairs. He sat and held his head in his hands; the guilt was overwhelming. It hung in the room heavily. He raised his head and glared at the dark wizard with a look that said he wasn't about to let Snape off the hook just yet. "That may well be. However, that does not absolve you for what you did!" he said viciously.

Snape let Harry's outburst roll right off him. He didn't seem concerned to have to explain himself to anyone. "She's cutting again," Snape announced harshly. "She's not going to stop, either. Something will have to be done, Albus," he said quietly.

"Now when you say 'cutting,'" asked Professor Lupin. "What do you mean?"

Ginny spoke up. "She has mutilated her thighs and arms with gouges and slashes. She carved the word 'UGLY' onto her stomach and the word 'SWOT' onto her chest!" She glowered at Snape. She wanted him to feel her hatred. She wanted him to choke on his guilt.

"Oh, God!" Professor Lupin said weakly as he rubbed his eyes.

"She's not only cutting again, but carving as well, Albus," reported Snape. "I have healed her again, but if she doesn't stop, the damage will be permanent. She keeps reopening the healed wounds."

Ginny couldn't believe the audacity of the wizard. She thought to herself the hell with it and let loose on him. Teacher or no, he was going to hear everything he had coming towards him. "Have you even tried to talk to Hermione? Have you even apologized?" Ginny shouted at him. McGonagall went to restrain her, but Dumbledore stopped her.

Snape glared at Ginny. "Young woman, I do not have to answer to you. You have no idea what I have lived through and continue to live through!" he thundered.

"Well, I guess that's how you can justify treating everyone like they are dragon dung under your boot!" she quipped. "You just go for the old 'none has suffered like me,' routine! But I don't give a shite. You're cruel and vicious because you're just a frustrated old man who has probably never had a shag outside Knockturn Alley!" she spat maliciously.

Professor McGonagall's face was white with rage. She pushed Dumbledore's arm out of her way and grabbed Ginny's arm. Some powerful magical force repelled her from touching the witch. Albus drew McGonagall to his side silently as Ginny raged, motioning for no one to touch the young witch. There was something going on within her, some primitive magic that could not be restrained.

Terrified to stand up to her, Lupin and McGonagall tried to calmly shush her, but she screamed at them. "Just, SHUT UP!" She pointed at Snape and continued to yell above everyone else. "He gets to say whatever the bloody hell comes into his mind to wound people, and we just have to take it? Why can't he take it for a change?"

She strode over to him and continued to rail. "You've blamed Harry for everything his dad and Sirius did to you as kids. Well, I'm turning the tables on you, Snape! I'm going to blame you for all the pain Hermione has experienced. And if she ends up killing herself, it'll be your fault!"

Then, she stormed out of the room with McGonagall following in her wake.