New Chapter for At the Beach
At the Beach
chivalric530 Reviews | 7.18/10 (530 Ratings, 0 Likes, 378 Favorites )
Ten years after the war, a man takes a stroll along the beach and meets someone from his past.
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About chivalric
Author
chivalric
Member Since 2007 | 65 Stories | Favorited by 776 | 213 Reviews Written | 4,182 Review Responses
Located in Germany. Female, around 40. The first chapters of my published novels/novellas can be found here on the archive.
Other than writing, I am reading, cycling, running, and singing in a choir.
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In case I don't react to mails for a considerable lenght of time (I usually get back to people within the week), please contact shellsnapeluver or Dreamy_Dragon. They both know how to get through to me.Or simply mail me at sampres55@yahoo.de
Reviews for At the Beach
I like the way you carefully avoided them looking into each others eyes closely enoughfor recognition to hit.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
I believe that their eyes would give them away... But it will take a while before they do ;-)Thanks a lot for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
I believe that their eyes would give them away... But it will take a while before they do ;-)Thanks a lot for reviewing!
She was just a tourist he wanted in his bed; she would go back to her husband in less than two weeks time. Or not.Maybe she'll stay with Carlos and the children forever. After all her git of a husband deserves it.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
:-) I won't tell. But the next chapter will be up soon.Thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
:-) I won't tell. But the next chapter will be up soon.Thanks for reviewing!
I love the swimming lessons with the kids. I'm still shcoked that he doesn't recognize her. Oh, well. It's time she opened up a little. He has.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
In the next chapter, she will. Promise. I will put it into queue in another few days.Thanks a lot for reviewing, dear!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
In the next chapter, she will. Promise. I will put it into queue in another few days.Thanks a lot for reviewing, dear!
I wonder what he'll see when he looks into her eyes. Haha! ~has suspicions~
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
*grin* That will take another few chapters, dear. The sunglasses are in the way, and whenever she takes them off, it's either too dark or she doesn't look at him or... well. You'll see. Thanks so much for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
*grin* That will take another few chapters, dear. The sunglasses are in the way, and whenever she takes them off, it's either too dark or she doesn't look at him or... well. You'll see. Thanks so much for reviewing!
Well, she's a hard nut to crack, isn't she. Severus' (Carlos') interest is interesting in itself. Even he is puzzled at it!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Easier prey for him, usually. Course he's puzzled - she doesn't fit into his pattern, but then, sometimes it's not for the worst to leave old paths and try new ones. He of all people knows that.Thanks a lot for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Easier prey for him, usually. Course he's puzzled - she doesn't fit into his pattern, but then, sometimes it's not for the worst to leave old paths and try new ones. He of all people knows that.Thanks a lot for reviewing!
Mmmm. I love the slow build of this story. Can't wait for more.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
I've written enough hasty stories - this was written in the summer, and I guess the slow motion of this story was caused by the heat back then ;-)Next chapter will go into queue soon. And many thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
I've written enough hasty stories - this was written in the summer, and I guess the slow motion of this story was caused by the heat back then ;-)Next chapter will go into queue soon. And many thanks for reviewing!
So she will go back to her husband... interesting ;-)
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
But of course she will go back, and I even will explain why she stays in a marriage she doesn't want. Soon. Promise!Thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
But of course she will go back, and I even will explain why she stays in a marriage she doesn't want. Soon. Promise!Thanks for reviewing!
Your story is brilliant, as you are an awesome author. I can't wait for more of this story.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Thank you so much, my dear! The next chapter will go into queue soon.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Thank you so much, my dear! The next chapter will go into queue soon.
I like how Carlos is plain spoken and direct in his intend towardTesa. If she pay a little bit more attention to what he offer as explanation , she can easily recognize old Severus. I wonder if in next chapter she , after night of hard consideration will be able to conect Carlos with Severus ( if he is alive). Rose should remind him of Hermione because of her bushy chesnut hair, blue eyes and freckles after Ron . I think that it will be rearly difficult for them to comprehend their mutual attraction eshablished on their glamour . I think that it will be a breaching - point in their relationship and , I fear a little bit for them. I am zealous that you update two great chapter in one day . Pleas do that more often . I realy like your story.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Thank you so much for your review! The next chapter will go into queue soon, and I promise to update regularly.She reminds him of someone, but at the moment, he can't put a finger on who it is. It will take a while before this will happen, let me tell you that much. But do not fear. This is a summer story, easy and slowly going, and it is written for notsosaintly, who ordered a happy ending ;-)
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Thank you so much for your review! The next chapter will go into queue soon, and I promise to update regularly.She reminds him of someone, but at the moment, he can't put a finger on who it is. It will take a while before this will happen, let me tell you that much. But do not fear. This is a summer story, easy and slowly going, and it is written for notsosaintly, who ordered a happy ending ;-)
Will he be angry when he figures out who she is? How does he hide the mark? I love how you have set everything up, he has told her some important details about who he is, just not his name. I look forward to the next chapter.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
I gave a hint in this chapter concerning the mark, but of course I will explain this in detail. It is hidden, naturally, as otherwise, she would have been very suspicious ;-)The next chapter is nearly ready to go into queue. Thanks a lot for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
I gave a hint in this chapter concerning the mark, but of course I will explain this in detail. It is hidden, naturally, as otherwise, she would have been very suspicious ;-)The next chapter is nearly ready to go into queue. Thanks a lot for reviewing!
"My daddy doesn't wear any jewellery," not realising that she had just revealed to her swimming teacher that her father didn't wear a wedding ring, either. "He says it bothers him at work. And Mummy left her ring at home. She wants to become tanned all over."
Wow, definitely out of the mouth of babes. Those words gave me a strong image of many days spent unhappily trying to keep up a brave face in front of her children. Especially tied with Carlos asking if Tessa's husband ever told her how beautiful she is. It sounds like her husband belittles her. Sounds like how I imagined a Ron/Hermione relationship. Your story is very compelling and I can't wait to read more.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave such a nice review. I promise to update soon and regularly!Ron/Hermione is just something I don't like to think about. The problem is, I like him, as long as he keeps his fingers away from Snape's woman ;-) So I think your wording "belittles her" is the perfect description. He is neither cruel nor abusive (or she would left him long ago), but he is just not the man for her. Hopefully, she might realise that soon herself ;-)
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave such a nice review. I promise to update soon and regularly!Ron/Hermione is just something I don't like to think about. The problem is, I like him, as long as he keeps his fingers away from Snape's woman ;-) So I think your wording "belittles her" is the perfect description. He is neither cruel nor abusive (or she would left him long ago), but he is just not the man for her. Hopefully, she might realise that soon herself ;-)
You have ended this chapter wery well, with a strong portait of his thoughts and feelings. I like his desire to offer her a new life. I like what you said about his former desire to swim out and not return, until he realized a new life waited for him. This is a charming tale! Thank you for sharing it with us.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Thank you, dear! I decided to tell this story mainly from his POV to be able to add his thoughts and feelings and how he had become the man he is now. I needed an explanation for his new looks, his OOC (= friendly) behaviour, and his desire to make her happy. I am glad that it works for you!The next chapter is nearly ready to get posted. Thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Thank you, dear! I decided to tell this story mainly from his POV to be able to add his thoughts and feelings and how he had become the man he is now. I needed an explanation for his new looks, his OOC (= friendly) behaviour, and his desire to make her happy. I am glad that it works for you!The next chapter is nearly ready to get posted. Thanks for reviewing!
I like the way this is progressing - slowly but with a purpose. I hope you update soon!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
This is a summer story - it is hot, it is pleasant outside, and yes, it is progressing slowly ;-) And with a purpose!Will update regularly. The next chapter is in queue.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
This is a summer story - it is hot, it is pleasant outside, and yes, it is progressing slowly ;-) And with a purpose!Will update regularly. The next chapter is in queue.
Hmm, of course he's up for a challenge. I can't wait to find out more about 'Tessa' and why she's not upset that her hubby isn't with her.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
We are talking of Ron here, dear. Would you like to have a Ron if you could have a Snape?Sorry, got carried away by my imagination ;-)Will explain about Tessa's relationship with hubby. Next chapter should be up soon.Thanks for reviewing!
Response from debjunk (Reviewer)
Lol, of course I wouldn't! I wouldn't want Ron even if Snape didn't exist. (What a horrid thought! I just scared myself.) But I'm still curious as to why she would be dumb enough to marry him and then regret it a few years later. I mean, I can fill in the blanks, but it's just better reading all about it.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Happens to the best of us, doesn't it? But I promise to fill in the gaps ;-)
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
We are talking of Ron here, dear. Would you like to have a Ron if you could have a Snape?Sorry, got carried away by my imagination ;-)Will explain about Tessa's relationship with hubby. Next chapter should be up soon.Thanks for reviewing!
Response from debjunk (Reviewer)
Lol, of course I wouldn't! I wouldn't want Ron even if Snape didn't exist. (What a horrid thought! I just scared myself.) But I'm still curious as to why she would be dumb enough to marry him and then regret it a few years later. I mean, I can fill in the blanks, but it's just better reading all about it.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Happens to the best of us, doesn't it? But I promise to fill in the gaps ;-)
I really like this chapter. I very much like that Snape is not after sex only, but companionship and also willing to make another person happier, even if it means he doesn't get an affair out of it.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Ah, he has changed, hasn't he? I couldn't stand the thought to write another fic where he's just the broken hero. He has his scars, but they are healed well. And he has learned that, for being happy, he has to make others happy, too.Thanks for reviewing. Next chapter should be up soon.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Ah, he has changed, hasn't he? I couldn't stand the thought to write another fic where he's just the broken hero. He has his scars, but they are healed well. And he has learned that, for being happy, he has to make others happy, too.Thanks for reviewing. Next chapter should be up soon.
What a lovely fic! Very well done to you! I'd write more, but since it's now 4am (I stayed up reading your story) it probably wont be very articulate. All I can really say is that I positively loved it, which is especially amazing since epilogue-compliant fics are usually my worst enemy! Cheers! :D
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Usually, I ignore canon in general and the epilogue/end of DH specifically. but as I have written many stories by now, I thought I'd try sth new for a change. Thanks a lot for reading and reviewing!
Really good so far! Can't wait for Carlos to brighten up Tessa's vacation with some companionship. Yeah.. companionship. ;)
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
He will, dear, he will. With peaches and a swim and dinner and... Well. You'll see ;-)Thanks a lot for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
He will, dear, he will. With peaches and a swim and dinner and... Well. You'll see ;-)Thanks a lot for reviewing!
A nice Severus would certainly be beyond her comprehension, even if she didn't think he was dead!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Very good point :-) And besides - think of Alan Rickman once as Snape, once as Sherif of Nottingham. They might look alike, but it is definitely not the same man *g*Thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Very good point :-) And besides - think of Alan Rickman once as Snape, once as Sherif of Nottingham. They might look alike, but it is definitely not the same man *g*Thanks for reviewing!
loved the interplay between them - hopeful but not overly so. I like how the kids are allowed to just be kids. Nice chapter. why the fake names, though?
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Because otherwise this story wouldn't have worked, dear. They don't recognise each other, and if she'd have said "Hi, I'm Hermione," the plot would have exploded into tiny little shards ;-)Will explain (hopefully everything) throughout the story. More interplay to come soon. And many thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Because otherwise this story wouldn't have worked, dear. They don't recognise each other, and if she'd have said "Hi, I'm Hermione," the plot would have exploded into tiny little shards ;-)Will explain (hopefully everything) throughout the story. More interplay to come soon. And many thanks for reviewing!
I really like where this is going. I think. Hahha :)
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Now where do you think it is going??Next chapter will be sent out today. Then you can have a peek and see if you still like it ;-) If this is the right word...Thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Now where do you think it is going??Next chapter will be sent out today. Then you can have a peek and see if you still like it ;-) If this is the right word...Thanks for reviewing!
I wonder how time it will take tothese two to recognize each other. I also wonder why "Tessa" is blond and why she's gone alone with the children in vacation (the "too much work" explanation doesn't work for me). I'll add that I like the way "Carlos" is thinking: he doesn't necessary need to bed her but wants some companionship preferably with a brilliant mind. That will make the story more substantial and I excitedly look forward to it.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Did I say they will recognise them at all??I'll give an explanation why she is blond and why her husband isn't with her - there is more than too much work indeed.Thanks for liking Carlos. He is in a way OOC, but I figured that ten years can change a man. Thanks for reviewing. More to come soon!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Did I say they will recognise them at all??I'll give an explanation why she is blond and why her husband isn't with her - there is more than too much work indeed.Thanks for liking Carlos. He is in a way OOC, but I figured that ten years can change a man. Thanks for reviewing. More to come soon!
I really like this story! I like how the fact that both of them are using glamours and other names makes them get to know eachother as persons in a "fresh" way. I do see that said glamours and names could be a problem later on in their relationship, provided that there will be a relationship, but for now I let it intrigue me:-) What I also enjoy is Severus behaviour around her children, it shows his softer side without making him soft, it makes him even more attractive. No matter what will happen between "Tessa" and "Carlos", or Hermione and Severus, (based on if they get so close that loosing the glamours is an option), I do hope you will have her leave Ron.... Hermione married to Ron, just the idea should have landed JKR in Azkaban for at least 19 years....:-))
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Oh, no, only she is using a glamour. He looks just different. I tried to explain it in a previous reply (don't know if it worked, though) - he once was pale, greasy, longhaired, unhappy, snappy. He now is tanned, his hair is only an inch long, he tries to seduce her, he's a winegrower, and his very black eyes (which might have given him away) are hidden behind sunglasses. Besides, he's dead. Well. You know what I mean ;-)Totally agree about Azkaban, dear!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Oh, no, only she is using a glamour. He looks just different. I tried to explain it in a previous reply (don't know if it worked, though) - he once was pale, greasy, longhaired, unhappy, snappy. He now is tanned, his hair is only an inch long, he tries to seduce her, he's a winegrower, and his very black eyes (which might have given him away) are hidden behind sunglasses. Besides, he's dead. Well. You know what I mean ;-)Totally agree about Azkaban, dear!
Wonderful chapter, can't wait to see what happened to 'Tess' and how 'Carlos' will react once he figures out who she really is.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
:-) That will take a while, I can assure you. And I promise to explain what happened to Tessa!Thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
:-) That will take a while, I can assure you. And I promise to explain what happened to Tessa!Thanks for reviewing!
oh god hurry update soon...you have me hook like and sinker...i want to say so many things i would like to see in this story...but i wont....i will leave it up to your creative genious...everything else i have read of yours has been fabu...and i know this is just going to be fabu too...giggle...keep up the good work...
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
*scratches her head in confusion*You know who I am? Now how come? Becaus I am sure I didn't leave a hint anywhere!*runs to check*No, I didn't. I think. And as the story is finished, including epilogue, please let me know what you would like to find in it. I am always open to suggestions as long as they fit into the story!Thanks for reviewing!Oh, and yes, I will put the next chapter into queue this weekend.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
*scratches her head in confusion*You know who I am? Now how come? Becaus I am sure I didn't leave a hint anywhere!*runs to check*No, I didn't. I think. And as the story is finished, including epilogue, please let me know what you would like to find in it. I am always open to suggestions as long as they fit into the story!Thanks for reviewing!Oh, and yes, I will put the next chapter into queue this weekend.
Lovely chapter. Carlos and Tessa, hmm. Who hasn't hidden behind sunglasses at one time or another. I like hearing Carlos' underlying thoughts. Well done, can't wait for the next chapter.
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
She hides behind sunglasses. He wears them because his eyes are sensitive to the sun ;-)Let me check... yes, this is mostly written from Carlos's POV, so more thoughts of his will be revealed soon. Thanks for reviewing!
Response from chivalric (Author of At the Beach)
She hides behind sunglasses. He wears them because his eyes are sensitive to the sun ;-)Let me check... yes, this is mostly written from Carlos's POV, so more thoughts of his will be revealed soon. Thanks for reviewing!