Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Hermione flew for a long time. She needed a good think and flying helped her to do just that. Her wings stretched out from her body. The gentle, warm wind coursed over her as she flew over the lake. This feeling was truly exhilarating. Pointing upward, she soared higher, flapping her wings to gain altitude. Leveling off, she looked down, finding the lake much farther below her. Pulling her wings flat against her body, she let herself fall for a while before extending them again and straightening her trajectory. She glided along as her mind swirled around the subject that hadn't been far from it for several days... Severus Snape.

She was at a loss as to what to do about that man. Her feelings for him were coming to a head. She wasn't sure how much longer she could act normally around him. The more time they spent together, the more she wanted to pull him to her and kiss him senseless.

Oh, Severus, if only I knew how you felt.

His actions seemed to show that he cared for her, but she couldn't be sure. They were friends... good friends... but did that translate into attraction? He seemed to enjoy holding her hand, which seemed utterly out of character for Severus Snape. He just didn't go around grabbing people's hands and strolling around with them securely within his. That little act had to mean something.

Should she say something to him? What if she'd read the whole situation incorrectly, and she destroyed the friendship she had come to find so dear?

Come on, Hermione, the main reason you feel this way about your friendship is because you're crazy about him. If you want him, tell him.

She flew on, her wings beating up and down in short bursts. Severus was the type who would question himself and any positive feelings shown him. Maybe he was just being insecure about his feelings. Maybe she would have to make the advances to get him to acknowledge how he felt.

Circling around, she began to head back to Hogwarts. Yes, ultimately, she would need to confess her attraction to him. She needed to do one other thing before that, though.

Severus paced in the Defense classroom. Classes were over for the day. He should be heading to the Great Hall for dinner, but his mind was racing so he had to calm it down before being seen there. He'd been bombarded by images of Hermione Granger all day. He'd actually passed her in the hall before the start of classes, and she'd given him a beautiful smile. That smile hadn't left his thoughts in over four hours. Cursed woman, worming her way into my head like that. Why can't she just leave me in peace?

He grunted. It was no mystery as to why his thoughts were centered on her. He'd been falling for her more and more with every passing day. His internal voices had argued with him over and over again about the intelligence of that choice. Deep down, he knew that her affection toward him was only her deep level of caring about every creature on the earth. There was no special place in her heart for him. She was just an affectionate friend. He'd seen her be incredibly demonstrative to Potter and Weasley also, and there was nothing going on there.

What if I'm wrong, though? She never recoiled when they held hands. Their hugs had shown genuine affection. Could she think of him as more than just a friend? Could that possibility be the case?

He'd agonized over this for days now. He'd never really know how she felt unless he asked her. Anxiety filled him. What if this was all one-sided? It would be Lily all over again...friendship without the benefits.

"Oh, hell, man, if you don't say anything, you'll never know," he said to himself. "It's better to have everything on the table. Then you can either move forward or get over it!"

So, there was his answer. He'd tell her. She'd laugh in his face, but at least he'd know with certainty that he'd been dreaming impossible dreams. He'd speak with her right after dinner.

Turning, he left his classroom and headed for the Great Hall. He waited for her until the last teachers and students had left, but Hermione never came to dinner that night. A gentle hand alighted on his shoulder. He looked up to see Minerva smiling down at him.

"She had an errand to run tonight, Severus. She'll be back late."

Severus gave a small scowl, berating himself for being so obvious. Minerva patted his shoulder. "I'm glad Hermione is your friend. I hope we can become friends again some day."

Severus eyed Minerva. "That would be acceptable if you are willing."

Minerva gave Severus a shocked look. "I didn't think you wanted..."

"I am trying to put the past behind me. New starts would be helpful in that."

Minerva nodded. "I think that after the war we are all looking for new starts. Perhaps tea in my office?"

Severus rose and extended his arm. Minerva grasped it and walked along with him. They were silent during the time it took to get from the Great Hall to the Gargoyle guarding Minerva's office. She turned to him then and gave him a small smile.

"Thank you, Severus. Your forgiveness means much to me."

"As does yours, Minerva, whether I've said it before or not."

"There was nothing in need of my forgiveness." Minerva murmured the password, and the Gargoyle moved aside. Severus motioned for her to enter the stairwell.

"That well may be," he replied. "I am still glad you could get over everything that happened last year."

Minerva moved past him, and they both ascended to her office. "You are an incredibly brave man. Thank you for all that you did."

Severus made no reply, but he gazed at Minerva in surprise. He felt relief flood him as he finally accepted her words at face value. He was looking forward to rekindling his friendship with her.

Hermione entered the large office. She'd been in this office many times after the war, arguing the case for Severus Snape. She approached the desk and looked at the man seated behind it. Kingsley Shacklebolt smiled brightly at her.

"Hermione, how are you?" he said with a grin.

Hermione extended her hand and shook Kingsley's. "I'm fine, Minister. How are you?"

Kingsley gave Hermione a stern look. "You know that I don't like it when you call me Minister, Hermione. We're too good of friends to use such formalities. It makes me feel like an overlord."

Hermione laughed. "Well, Kingsley, we might be going back to such formalities when you hear why I have come by today."

Kingsley motioned for her to take a seat as he sat back, waiting to hear what Hermione had to say. When Hermione was settled, she folded her hands around her crossed legs and looked up at Shacklebolt.

"This is about Severus Snape."

Shacklebolt frowned. "I didn't expect him to cause any trouble. What has he done?"

"That's just it, Kingsley. He hasn't done anything. As a matter of fact, the things he did before the war should be enough proof that he's on our side. We've had this conversation over and over again. Why has the Ministry put such horrid restrictions on him?"

"Snape feels comfortable at Hogwarts."

Hermione furrowed her brow. "You strip him of his status as Headmaster and throw him back into teaching...a profession he's never cared for...and you expect him to feel comfortable?"

Kingsley drummed his fingers on the desk. "The Wizengamot did what they felt was best. I figured he'd be fine once he got used to the idea."

Hermione felt her anger spread through her. She'd not expected to get the run-around, but Kingsley was pushing a bunch of lies right in her face.

"Kingsley... I know that Minerva came here before the school year and explained this to you ad nauseam, so don't try to play the innocent one here. You claim to be grateful for all that Severus has done for the Wizarding community, yet you treat him like a convict on parole."

"Look, Hermione, my hands are tied. The Wizengamot voted to have these restrictions placed upon Severus. I cannot go against Wizarding law just because I feel he's not a threat."

"Do you really feel he's not a threat, or are you just trying to appease me?"

"I believe that Severus Snape fought on our side, and that he's not a threat."

"Then do something about this!" Hermione cried.

"As I said, my hands are tied."

Hermione's shoulders slumped as she eyed Shacklebolt gravely. "How wide was the margin in favor of these restrictions?"

"Fifty-four percent of the Wizengamot voted in favor of the restrictions."

"That's only a simple majority. It can be overturned," Hermione said sagely.

"It's a majority, Hermione. The Wizengamot has ruled; there's nothing that can be done."

Hermione reached into her robes and pulled a miniaturized book from her pocket. Waving her wand over it, the book enlarged to its rightful proportions. She opened it to where a bookmark was placed and turned the book so that Kingsley could see it.

He read through it quickly and looked back up at her. "What are you implying?"

Hermione huffed. "I'm not implying anything, Kingsley. It clearly states that if there isn't a two-thirds majority, the Minister may overturn any ruling."

"I can't do that."

"Why not?" Hermione demanded.

"I will not go against the Wizengamot's ruling."

"Kingsley, it states right there that you, as Minister, have the right to do just that."

Shacklebolt slammed the book shut. "This is my job, Hermione. I know how to do it!"

"Then stop pandering! You are the Minister of Magic. Stop trying to make friends! You were elected to govern, so govern! This isn't a game, Kingsley. You are meddling with someone's life just so the Wizengamot won't be angry with you. Well, sometimes you have to make hard decisions."

Kingsley regarded her levelly. He began to drum his fingers on the table again in frustration. "What if I refuse?"

Hermione sat back and huffed. She folded her arms in front of her. "There's nothing I can do about it, is there? If you choose to appease the Wizengamot instead of doing the right thing, then I must abide by that decision."

"You wouldn't take this to the media?"

Hermione let her head drop in frustration. "Kingsley, what do you take me for? I know how the media twists everything. I'm sure I could garner sympathy by using that route, but I am reticent to have anything to do with the media. I'm not out to destroy your position; I just want you to rule wisely and justly."

Kingsley studied her for a while. "Thank you for that, Hermione. You're right, of course. I was trying to protect my standing among the Wizengamot. It is difficult to rule when they are your enemy."

"You can rule justly without making enemies."

"I did try. I argued Snape's case, telling the Wizengamot that he was unhappy at Hogwarts. They didn't care."

Hermione shook her head. "I never thought of you as a typical politician; pandering to those who yell the loudest. What's happened to you?"

"The realities of governing are far different from the ideals. There's constant bickering and underhanded moves. Things are improving, but it's very slow going. If I'm going to make any headway here, I need the Wizengamot on my side. In order to survive, one has to compromise one's standards."

Hermione leaned forward and placed her hands on the desk. "But you are the Minister! Surely, you have a say in how everything is governed."

"I'm working on getting those who are corrupt out of office. I am in the process of getting rid of Dolores Umbridge as we speak. Reform is a slow process and will take some time. To be honest, this matter with Snape seemed relatively simple, and I didn't want to take the time to fight about it."

"So, you just gave up..."

Kingsley's eyes narrowed slightly. "No, I did what I felt was best at the time."

Hermione's lips thinned. "How could you think that best? You just did what was easiest. You said so yourself just now."

"Despite my misgivings, I figured Snape would settle into a routine. I hoped he would feel comfortable eventually."

"How can he feel comfortable with the threat of Aurors watching his every move?" Hermione threw up her hands in disgust. "I truly expected better of you. What you've done... what you've allowed to be done... it's just wrong."

Kingsley studied her as he drummed his fingers on the table. "I do think he'd be happier freed from this decree and able to go about doing as he pleases. I always have."

"Then make this right! Help Severus to fully heal from everything he's had to go through for the last twenty years." She looked him straight in the eye. "It's the least you can do for a war hero like him. Do the right thing, Kingsley, please."

Kingsley regarded her for a long while, debating everything in his mind. Finally, he gave a slight nod and pulled a parchment and Dicta-quill out of his top drawer. The parchment had the official letterhead of the Ministry emblazoned on it in gold leaf. He quickly dictated an overturning of the ruling. Waving his wand over the parchment he made several copies and handed two to Hermione.

"Give one of these to Minerva; the other is for Snape. That should take care of everything."

Hermione looked to Kingsley gratefully. "Thank you. I'm sure he'll be relieved not to have to live under the thumb of the Ministry any longer."

"As you said, it's the right thing to do. I'll just have to deal with whatever fallout comes of it. Tell Snape good luck in his future endeavors."

Hermione rose and smiled at Shacklebolt. "I will, sir. Thank you again."

Minerva lowered the parchment and stared at Hermione incredulously.

"What on earth did you do to convince him to give you this?" she queried.

"I just told him the facts."

Minerva huffed. "Facts didn't seem to persuade him when I spoke with him."

"I believe my facts were a bit harder to ignore," Hermione replied sagely.

Minerva put the parchment on the desk. "Well, I'm glad he did it, but now what am I to do for a Defense teacher?"

"Maybe you can persuade Severus to stay until you can find a replacement."

"You're kidding, right? He'll have his things packed and be out of here before the day's end."

Hermione felt a sudden sadness envelop her. "Let me talk to him. Maybe I can convince him to stay around for a few weeks."

Minerva chuckled. "Good luck!"

Hermione stood outside Severus' room, pacing back and forth. In all honesty, she didn't know what to say to him. He had every right to just up and leave with this new decree. After all that he'd been through, she wouldn't blame him one bit. Unfortunately for her, the thought of him leaving left a wide gaping hole in her. She had come to treasure their moments spent together and would miss him terribly.

She debated within herself whether to tell Severus how she felt. She'd convinced herself before that she should, but now that the time was upon her, a great fear of rejection had settled in her stomach, and it screamed at her to just keep her mouth shut.

"Might as well go for it," she muttered to herself. "He won't be here very long if it all goes south."

With that, she stopped pacing and knocked on his door. She smiled at him as he opened it, but her insides were churning. She looked at him... really looked at him. He seemed a bit less tense and forlorn than he'd looked in a while. She was truly happy to see that. She took in the strong lines of his face and felt herself turn to mush. Some may think his features to be harsh, but Hermione felt they were distinguished. Distinguished? I mean gorgeous.

"Come in," Severus offered as he ushered her in.

She passed by him, taking in the fresh scent of mountain air wafting from him. It was enough to make her want to get closer and sniff deeply, but she restrained herself. Smiling at him instead, she headed into the front room.

Severus motioned for her to settle into the couch, and he took a place next to her.

"Hermione, I wasn't expecting you to stop by," he said.

"I have something for you, Severus," she explained while pulling the parchment from her robes.

She handed the scroll to him. Severus looked up quizzically. "What's this?" he asked.

"You'll have to open it to find out," Hermione offered.

Pulling the ribbon from the scroll, he unrolled it and quickly read its contents. His eyes grew wide. They shot from the parchment to Hermione's eyes in wonder.

"What did you do?" he asked in amazement.

"I told Kingsley to do his job."

"This... this says there are no restrictions over me. That means I can live my life as I wish!"

Hermione smiled at him. "I know, Severus. You deserve nothing less."

Severus stood abruptly. "Tell Minerva that I quit."

He turned and retreated to his bedroom, leaving a shocked Hermione gaping after him. She knew he was eager to leave Hogwarts, but she had no idea that he'd want to leave immediately. He hadn't even given her a second glance. She bit her lower lip. Maybe this wasn't the right time to bring up her feelings.

Rising from the couch, she wandered over to the bedroom door and looked in. Severus was standing over a box. Clothes were folding themselves and settling in the box, but Severus stood apart from it, staring off into the distance. Hermione watched him curiously. He seemed to be deep in thought and a large frown was upon his face.

Hermione moved into the room. She sidestepped the clothing and came up next to Severus.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

Severus came out of his reverie and glanced at her. He quickly looked away, his frown growing larger.

"Hermione..."

"Severus..." they both said at the same time.

"Go ahead," Severus offered.

"No, Severus, you go first."

Severus stared pensively at the wall before finally turning to Hermione.

"I am obviously ecstatic to be leaving," he began. "I was so excited that I rushed in here without thinking of the full meaning of my leaving." Averting his eyes from hers, he looked over her shoulder. "I have become very fond of you, Hermione. The realization that I won't be seeing you gives me pause. I... will... miss you."

For a man like Severus Snape, his simple statement probably could be construed as a furtive declaration of love. Hermione did not let that slip her mind.

Hermione took a step closer to Severus and smirked at him. "I was going to say much the same thing," she admitted.

Severus looked to her with guarded eagerness. "Really?"

Hermione pushed herself to be bold. Being forward had never been her forte. She knew, however, that it was either tell him about her feelings now or lose the chance entirely.

"Severus, I've found that as we've gotten to know each other better, I..." She was the one to avert her eyes now. "I've fallen in love with you."

Within seconds Severus closed the gap between them and lifted his hand to cup her cheek. "You love me?" he asked.

"Yes," Hermione answered.

His eyes flickered with emotion as he gazed upon Hermione. He spoke, but his voice was merely a whisper. "I love you, too." His hand caressed her face as he looked at every inch of it. "I don't want to lose you," he admitted.

Bending low, he placed a tender kiss on her lips. Hermione wasted no time in entwining her fingers in his hair and pulling him even closer. She turned his tender kiss into a passionately intense one, opening her mouth and allowing him to enter. She drank in his taste hungrily, giving a slight moan when he finally pulled away from her.

"This can't really be happening," he murmured.

"Why not?" Hermione asked.

"Things like this don't work out for me," Severus explained.

"Everyone deserves happiness, Severus."

"For a long time, I didn't think I did."

Hermione's hand snaked from his hair and caressed his cheek. "I hope you still don't think that."

"You have helped me to see that even I have a right to be happy, Hermione."

Tears formed, unbidden in Hermione's eyes. She pulled Severus close to her and hugged him furiously. "Severus, you don't know what it means to me to hear you say that. I've been so worried about you because you've been so despondent."

"Thank you for not giving up on me. I'd still be wallowing in guilt if it wasn't for you."

"I could never give up on you, Severus."

He smiled then. "How could I not love you? You buoy me up when I am at my lowest." His voice became husky, as he choked up. "Thank you," he uttered before pulling her close. "Even when I was horrible to you, you kept trying. You... you didn't let me drive you away, even though I desperately wanted to."

"I've been best friends with Harry Potter for most of my life," she replied with a laugh. "I'm adept at not being driven away. Harry tried it often, so I had to keep reminding him that I was his friend and that friends stick together. Severus, I do not easily abandon those I love."

"I'm glad for that," Severus whispered. "You have helped me to forgive myself. I am beginning to see that I've punished myself long enough for my youthful mistakes. I am ready to leave all that behind me."

Hermione pulled back and smiled so widely that her entire face lit up. "I can't tell you how relieved I am. Hopefully, you can recognize how wonderful you are now."

Severus scoffed. "You are the only one to think I'm wonderful, Hermione. That's just evidence that you've lost your mind."

"I am still in my right mind, you foolish man. I will always be here for you, Severus."

"I'm not sure that I deserve that from you."

Hermione smiled up at him. "Remember, you deserve much more than you give yourself credit for."

"But this... This, Hermione, is more than I could have ever hoped for."

Hermione stroked his hair. "Then maybe you should set your standards a little higher. You deserve this and so much more."

"You are what I need to be happy, Hermione."

Hermione looked at Severus seriously. "I know you are anxious to get away from Hogwarts, but do you think you could stay until Minerva finds a replacement for you?"

"The thought of leaving you makes me hollow inside. I will stay here as long as is necessary."

Hermione frowned. " I know you hate it here. I don't want you to stay just on my account."

Severus shook his head. "That's not what I'm suggesting. I will stay until a replacement is found and no longer. That should give us enough time to plan for my leaving. We should be able to have ironed out a way to see each other by then."

"I could leave, too," Hermione offered.

Severus pushed her hair behind her ear while smiling at her. "No, Hermione. You enjoy your position here. Besides, Minerva would kill me. That's one witch I want to keep happy."

Hermione looked deeply into Severus' eyes. They were filled with affection for her. His whole face mirrored a happiness that had never been present within it. Her heart soared at the thought that he could find happiness and that happiness included her. She smiled at him.

"We'll make this work, Severus. I don't want to lose you either."

Any other thing she may have said was quickly silenced by Severus' mouth coming down on hers. She quickly lost all sense of reason as his sensual kiss emptied her mind of everything except him. His intense male presence and the fingers that were curling through her hair sent her into sensory overload. Oh, everything about him was electric to her. Too soon, his kisses had ended, and he'd pulled back. His eyes bored into hers.

"My beautiful Red," he murmured.

She smiled at him before he took her mouth captive again, blissfully giving in to his every whim.