A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>
Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party93 Reviews | 93 Ratings, 0 Likes, 104 Favorites )
In which Harry is somewhat indiscriminately randy, Snape struggles manfully to be completely oblivious, Hermione is a connoisseur of printed-out Internet porn, and Draco exits the closet dramatically and demands Resolution of Sexual Tension. This is your TPP chat room on crack—fic.
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About Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party
Author
Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party
Member Since 2006 | 4 Stories | Favorited by 0 | 0 Reviews Written | 281 Review Responses
This penname was founded by a band of intrepid loonies who got together during the early days of the TPP chat room (and bonded further during the dark days of WIKKT chat's exile to the TPP chatroom). Together, we generated an idea for a fic so ridiculous, no one of us alone was willing to take credit for it. It's amazing what mischief a bunch of alleged adults can get up to under the influence of no alcohol whatsoever. Pennames of individual authors will be posted here in alphabetical order, if and when they elect to admit their involvement in the project.
It will continue to serve as a penname for any collaborations born in the TPP chatroom and a beacon of comedy in an angsty fandom.
The usual suspects (for 'A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Victory Photo'):
Editor: dracontia
Secretary: shalimar1981
Beta-of-Record: broomclosetravenclaw
Chief Britpicker: lux_astraea
Authors: broomclosetravenclaw, DawnEB, dracontia, JustDesmond, leniarianna, lux_astraea, shalimar1981, SSLupin, Wolfmoonshadow
Contributors: aturia, droxy, Hubby_of_Drac, ladyinthecloak, quilter_infinity, wonderfulchild
The usual suspects (for "A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional Hogwarts: A History'):
Editor/secretary: dracontia
Beta-of-Record: SeverusLovesUs
Authors: dracontia, Potteresque_ire, SeverusLovesUs, Snapemylove
Thank you to lux_astraea for the icons!
Charlotte's Angels Icon by ravine: 
Reviews for A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>
Needed a little cheering up. Thought I'd read this again and I'm glad I did. Very clever, dear Mad Chatters Tea Party. I love clever. I used to be clever then I got old and grumpy. Oh for the joy of youth.
You are right, that did not suck, not one little bit. I just loved mirror Voldie and the bug, and of course the bell bottoms { I see them in purple } 
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Purple. Sequined. Bell bottoms....Honey, you fit right in around here. You want to chip in on an episode of 'Chatlotte's Angels' sometime, give a holler.
Sweet Merlin! my glasses' have foged up I can hardly see, I haven't laught so much in years. 
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Mission accomplished! Thank you dearly, and happy epilogue to you. ~dracontia, up too late to make a clever response
Too many funny parts to choose from, but 
for the narrator.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Ahh, the Narrator. That incomparable compilation of every MST3K-esque remark we ever made in the chatroom about each other's goody ideas... happy memories there. 
Thanks fo the review!~dracontia, official review-responder among many other things
Thank you so much, I really need a good laugh right now.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Whenever you need a laugh, we're happy to oblige!~dracontia, on behalf of the entire mildly demented Mads team
Interesting study technic Hermione, I wonder if Harry and Draco will take it up, NEWTS are coming after all. Potter
Potter Potter Potter Potter Potter Potter Potter Potter PotterPotter Potter Weasley Weasley Thank you sooooooooooo much.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Once again, I apologize on behalf of all Mad Chatters, past and present, for that video flashback. Um... if it makes things any better, the original 'Badger-badger-badger-ad nauseum/mushroom, mushroom' video on which it was based is much worse. 
Thank you kindly for reviewing (and for daring another chapter after that last one!~dracontia, editor-in-chief-cook-and-bottle-washer
RST indeed! I hope you plan to do something constructive with HP/DM and SS/HG! Too much foreplay and not enough business going on here. Isn't it time for Hermione's detention yet? I do think Myrtle and the Meremaid do make a lovely couple. I may have to save, "You twatless snot, who still manages to smell like fish" in case I ever get a chance to say something really mean and childish. I liked it. At 50 something, however, it may not be until I'm in the rest home and allowed to say mean and childish things because old people can get away with such behavior. I hope I can still remember it by then.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Generally speaking, Mad Chatters prefer to be DE-structive (this is your cue to don a flack jacket before proceeding further in fic...)
Poor Ginny. Both the guys she normally ends up with in most SS/HG fics are taken. Who does that leave? Hmmmm...Neville. That works. But then Luna goes with who? ...A threesome. Neville and Ginny and Luna as a "couple". Yes, I think it works. OK. That problem is solved so it's on to the next chapter.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
We are fairly certain that Neville has no aversion to Bludgers of the correct sort. Thank you for reviewing!~dracontia, editor-in-chief-cook-and-teacup-washer
OMG! I actually couldn't look away, and I will never be able to read another fanfic without thinking about this one. I really did try to look away.......lol.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
*nods solemnly* This is fanfic that sticks to your brain. Thank you for reviewing, and we're glad you enjoyed... er, at least you got a laugh out of it!
My God, this is HILARIOUS!!!!! My laptop almost fell off my lap at the "goo" scene. A resounding "ew" to the Mermaid/Myrtle pairing, thanks for not going into too much detail. :)
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
On behalf of all the Mad Chatters, I thank you profousely! (and wish to state for the record that, as editor, I vetoed going into any more detail in Mermaid/Myrtle. The parties who wrote it were kindly informed that they could expand upon it on their own time, under their own pennames, if they so chose. )
Mysterious Ticking Noise! Brilliant!
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
LOL We only steal from the best!
mmm Sev in bell-bottoms... what a lovely image. This crazy story rocked. I haven't laughed this hard or much in years. *bows to the authors*
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Thank you most kindly for reviewing! We're so glad you enjoyed it, and hope you will join us for additional travels and travails with the Mad Chatters on the Crackfic Express!
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Thank you most kindly for reviewing! We're so glad you enjoyed it, and hope you will join us for additional travels and travails with the Mad Chatters on the Crackfic Express!
urgh...Naked!Dumbledore. That conjures awful images, but the rest of the chapter was hilarious.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Hehehe... be glad I used my editorial authority to ensure that it was only a MENTION of Naked!Dumbledore rather than an actual cameo! 
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Hehehe... be glad I used my editorial authority to ensure that it was only a MENTION of Naked!Dumbledore rather than an actual cameo!
I loved Hermione's comment about the "tent". She isn't the only one that would like to see that. :)
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
LOL! I think we managed to get a few tents in here--though not quite proportional to the amount of 'camp.' 
<-drag queen?
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
LOL! I think we managed to get a few tents in here--though not quite proportional to the amount of 'camp.' <-drag queen?
Oh the Hilarity!
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
*mad_chatters collectively take a bow!*
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
*mad_chatters collectively take a bow!*
OMG! This is so funny that I almost coughed water all over my laptop from laughing so hard. Great job!
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
oops--another piece of electronic equipment almost bites the dust!We're glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reviewing!
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
oops--another piece of electronic equipment almost bites the dust!We're glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for reviewing!
Sorry, I can't make any snappy remarks, I'm laughing too hard, and cleaning the Dr. Pepper off my screen. I know, I know, I was warned. On with the Mad Teaparty--for this I would learn to make tea myself.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
*passes the paper towels and the teapot*
Thanks kindly for reviewing! Secure your snacks and enjoy the rest of the show. :D
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
*passes the paper towels and the teapot*
Thanks kindly for reviewing! Secure your snacks and enjoy the rest of the show. :D
haha awsome read!!!!! forgot to heed the warning at this quote though
This definitely explains the billowing. Those things are so wide, they probably create their own weather system, nearly spewed on the computer haha..amazing amazing writting!!!!
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Thank you! The authors (of the Weather System Comment, in particular) squee with pride. :)
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Thank you! The authors (of the Weather System Comment, in particular) squee with pride. :)
You know, you should tell people in the summary not to drink or eat anything while reading this, it's a keyboard-hazzard story! I lost breath laughing! Had to laugh on a pillow, because it's late and hubbie and baby are sleeping!
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Oh, no--We forgot the warnings? *scrambles to correct the omission*Thanks kindly for extricating yourself from the pillow to review!
AHHHH! Scarred for life!This is fantastic! Looking forward to the crackfic!epilogue
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
LOL Hopefully not too scarred... the epilogue gave some of the authors 'issues,' so we're thinking of putting warning labels on it. :DThanks for the review!
I think this might actually be too funny! I have read quite a few stories that were funny. But, I don't think that I have ever read anything quite like this. Well done! I look forward to reading on.
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Thanks very much! Since we firmly believe there's no such thing as too funny, we shall continue in the same vein and hope to improve on it as we go along! :D
Wonderful! Absolutely wonderful!I can't wait for the next chapter.Beth
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Thank you kindly! One of our talented writing crew is on the injured list currently, but she is doing well and we shall resume progress as soon as she returns!
(Yes, comedy writing can be dangerous work, but we're thrill seekers.)
Really love Snape -- he's so channeling clueless!Harry right now, hehe 
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
LOL! Yep... short of putting his fingers in his ears and doing the 'La, la, I can't hear you' thing, we're not sure how much more he could refuse to interact with reality.
Thank you, dear partner-in-crime, for stopping by the tea table!
I tried noting all my favorite lines with comments, but the formatting tools are acting funky. So, in summary: myopic orbs, lack of RST, naked!Voldemort, the unread ffnet pages, Myrtle's foul language, Harry's jelly creation, something dangerously close to Ho!Mione, and a hilarious goo-perv!Snape. ^_^
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
And once again, your Gryffindor tendencies are revealed in that the expression naked!Voldemort did not send you racing for the door...
Or maybe it's just a Luna-like lack of interest in recognizing fear. Either way, luv, thanks for reviewing! :D
Hermione + ladder + short skirt = priceless. Screw the outline, indeed... ;-)
Response from Mad_Chatters_Tea_Party (Author of A Fanfic Reader's Unauthorized Guide to the Unconventional <i>Hogwarts: A History</i>)
Screw the outline, indeed... ;-)
Among other things! :D
Thanks for the review!!