Chapter Twenty-Eight: Siofre’s Sober Lads

Chapter Twenty-Eight: Siofre's Sober Lads

Early Monday evening, shortly after Siofre returned home, Malcolm arrived with Gluffy and all of the boxes, trunks, and cases that Bertrand and Sally had sent on ahead of them. Under Sorrel's direction, Gluffy and Penty, one of the house-elves from the lodge, were set to transferring everything to the North Tower, where Lydia had prepared several rooms in anticipation of her son's return to the estate. Lydia herself went up to the tower to see to it all, and she sent Malcolm into the Rose Parlour, where the others had gathered.

Malcolm was pleased to see Phoebe and Lachina, and greeted the former with an enthusiastic hug and the latter with a quick squeeze and light kiss on the cheek. "Two of my favourite cousins! My timing couldn't have been better," he exclaimed.

"You're just in time for dinner," Siofre said with a smirk. "Quite excellent timing, as always."

Malcolm laughed. "I'd be happy to stay, Grandmother, but I think that Gluffy had some plans to cook me supper...on Gertrude's orders."

"Pah!" Siofre said with a dismissive wave of her hand. "The elf-lad can be assured you'll eat well with us, and in turn, he'll have a good supper himself with the elves here...a nice outing for him."

"You twisted my arm," Malcolm said, grinning. "Besides, I can't desert Honnie and leave him all alone surrounded by witches on every side." He went to the side table and poured himself a Scotch.

"I do not suffer from it," Johannes said with a smile of his own.

"And I was wondering why you enjoy staying here during the week! I wonder no longer!" Malcolm answered with a laugh, the witches laughing in turn.

"Where is your friend...Gertrude?" Lachina asked. "I haven't met her yet, and I must say that I want to see the witch who has had the fortitude to take you in hand."

"You'll meet her Thursday," Malcolm replied, taking a seat on the sofa beside Phoebe. "And she is a formidable witch, I'll give you that!"

"Well, she won't go soft with you around, that's for sure," Phoebe said.

"And what about your man? Where is he tonight?" Malcolm asked.

"Declan is in Limerick...no, it's Sligo this week...doing research for his new book," Phoebe replied, "and also getting a few interviews for the Dublin Prophet to earn a few Sickles while he's there."

"'Bout the suddenly sober Clurichauns?" Malcolm asked.

"Aye," Phoebe said. "An' they're not just sober; they're downright sombre. It's turnin' all the wine sour and skunking all the beer. So far, the whiskey's still drinkable, though...'twon't be long afore the effect spreads to the Muggle pubs, so."

"That is a puzzle," Malcolm said, taking a swallow of whiskey. "So, Declan's going to interview the Cluries, or what?"

"Nay, just a few publicans, I gather," Phoebe replied.

"Is the effect still limited to Sligo?" Siofre asked.

"Mostly, from what I understand," Phoebe said.

"Have you ever heard of anything like this before?" Lachina asked Siofre.

"Nay, not like this," Siofre said. "Disgruntled or mischievous Clurichauns turning a household's wine or e'en causin' a distillery a wee bit o' bather, but naught like this. And they always remained cheerful and quite unsober, themselves, and they'd help themselves to a bit o' drink afore they soured the wine or struck the beer."

"Aye, all the news I've heard says that they haven't had a drop of ale or aught else in weeks," Malcolm said.

"Speaking of sobriety, I heard an interesting piece of news today," Siofre said, sipping her whisky.

"Aye?" asked Phoebe.

"Aye, though 'twas less about sobriety and more 'bout inebriation and the danger of drink too much taken," the older witch said, suppressing a smirk.

Johannes shot Malcolm a glance, but both wizards remained quiet.

"Probably wizards on a spree," Lachina said, shaking her head, though smiling as she saw the humour in her cousin's eyes.

"Aye," Siofre said. "Sad, sad state they were in, I hear, an' not a witch nearby to hold 'em to respectability."

Phoebe, catching on that there was some joke in the offing and wanting to play along with her great-aunt, said, "Some wizards would do well t' be kept on a tether, I sometimes think, the trouble they can get themselves into."

"Aye," Siofre agreed, looking at Malcolm and Johannes. "Wouldn't you lads agree?"

"Oh, aye, Grandmother! 'Tis a sad thing when a wizard goes astray," Malcolm agreed quickly.

"Most certainly," Johannes added, "but there are occasions when a wizard may be perfectly sober and yet find himself in the middle of others who are not so."

"Aye, and then what's a wizard to do?" Malcolm asked rhetorically.

"Ach, I'm sure a pair o' wizards...ones as respectable as, say, you and Honnie," Siofre said, "would find a way out."

"So what was the story you heard, Auntie?" Phoebe asked.

"Aye, tell us! We may need to look out for such wizards and avoid them in the future," Lachina said, her cheeks twitching with suppressed mirth.

"Ach, 'twas a sad story, truly," Siofre said, shaking her head. "A pair o' wizards...one a rough Highlander, by all accounts, an' one a silent foreigner...entered a pub an' interrupted a game o' chance. The Highlander insulted one o' the pub's patrons, I hear, and then 'twas a full brulyie, wi' spells thrown and blood flowin'. Emptied out the pub, they did, 'twas such a ragin' brawl."

Malcolm laughed. "All right, Grandmother! How did you hear of this? And how did you know who it was?"

Siofre smirked. "'Twasn't difficult to know who it was when I heard who'd won it, and that there was that half-giant from Hogwarts there, too. Honestly, lad! I send you to Hogsmeade with Honnie, and that same evenin', you're draggin' the man into a rammie at the Hog's Head...for I'm sure 'twasn't Honnie who provoked the fight!"

"Grandmother, I..." Malcolm began.

"It was not Malcolm who provoked the fight," Johannes interrupted. "He wished to avoid it."

"Was it you, then?" Lachina asked Johannes incredulously.

Johannes shook his head. "Nay."

"'Twas the other man," Malcolm said, "some cocky chap who called himself 'Cam.'"

"You could not have tried very hard to avoid the fight," Siofre said, "if Aberforth had to close the pub for the night...as if the poor man hadn't enough troubles without you vexin' him more!"

"I believe that this Cam wished a fight and nothing we did would have avoided one," Johannes said.

"And besides," Malcolm added, "once Hagrid threw the table at the man, there was no leaving, and we couldn't just stand there while he fought alone, wandless, against three nasty Azkies."

"They were criminals?" Lachina asked with a combination of excited curiosity and apprehension.

"Aye, the man Cam, was, anyway, an' I'd not be surprised if his 'brothers' were not of his blood but from his time in Azkaban."

"How did you know he had been in Azkaban?" Johannes asked, some puzzlement on his face.

"His tattoos," Malcolm replied, finishing his Scotch. "You could just see them when he'd reach for his drink and his sleeve would pull up a bit. And from the look of him, I'd say he'd not been out long...that grey pallor and lean, hungry look...but he'd also not spent long there, either. Too quick for the fight and too calm before it, too. He was looking for a fight, though, Grandmother," he added, turning to Siofre, "and I did what I could to put him off it, but I don't think he wanted the night to end peacefully."

"He also seemed to dislike you," Johannes said, "and you in particular. He seemed to have known who you were, so he may have been looking for a fight, but he was especially glad, I think, to find one with you."

"And if he hadn't provoked Hagrid, we might have still managed to avoid the fight, unless Cam had cast the first hex," Malcolm said, "but he did provoke Hagrid, and so we may not have wanted a fight, but once it found us"...Malcolm shrugged..."we did have to end it, didn't we, Honnie? And walk out on our own, too."

Johannes twitched a slight smile. "Except for Baldy."

"Baldy?" Lachina asked.

"Aye." Johannes's smile grew. "Short, dark, broad fellow. Very hairy. Hagrid had to carry him out."

"So how did you hear about this, Grandmother?" Malcolm asked.

"'Twasn't from the Magister," Siofre replied, "though I'd hae liked it from him."

"I am sorry, Siofre," Johannes said quickly. "I thought to save you some concern."

Siofre chuckled. "An' yourself some, too, no doubt. But I heard it first from a Healer who said she'd had to treat some fellows for hurts received in a Hogsmeade bar fight. A few further questions to her and then to some other acquaintances o' mine, and I soon discovered the pub and the name of one of the brawlers...well known, he seems to hae made himself. It was not difficult to draw the conclusion that the 'quiet foreign gentleman' was our own gardener-in-residence, since the two of you went to Hogsmeade together that very evening."

"Well, as I said, we didn't go out looking for a fight, did we, Honnie? And as for Aberforth, I stopped by yesterday evening to see him, and I helped him to do a few repairs around the pub, so that appeased him a wee bit. Besides, Aberforth's no fan of Cam or his mates, either, though they're usually quiet enough when they come into the Hog's Head. Honnie's right: seems I bring out the mean in those lads," Malcolm said with a smirk, "though I'd never even noticed them myself till that night."

"Pah! You brought Johannes out to the Hog's Head...and much as I like Aberforth, the clientele there isn't always very reputable in the evenings, or even at other times...and then you could hae left the table and avoided the fight, but I'll warrant you never thought to get up and leave, did you, laddie?"

Malcolm shook his head. "It wasn't that simple, Grandmother...and the man needed a lesson taught him, anyway."

"Hmph. From what Healer Smethwyck and my cousin, Healer Marsh, said, two of the wizards had been taught a hard lesson, indeed, and even the third was kept overnight, though none of them would say what had happened to them. Just that they'd had an 'accident' in the Hog's Head. The rest that I learned, I had to glean from other sources."

"So, what happened?" Phoebe asked curiously.

"Ah, now that is a story, and a thirsty one," Malcolm said. He Summoned the whisky decanter and poured himself another drink. "Johannes can begin the telling."

Johannes shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Ja, nun . . . we were in Hogsmeade. It seemed early enough still for one pint. We went to the Hog's Head, which was full on a Saturday night. I knew almost no one there, but we saw Hagrid and we joined him...he became a friend of mine when I taught at Hogwarts, you see, and he was pleased to see us both. There was some mention of gambling earlier, but the dice game that Hagrid had been playing was finished. He had lost, but not to Cam: to his own friend, Baldy. We joined them...that is, Hagrid, Baldy, a man called Patch, and this man who said he was Cam. Malcolm bought all at the table drinks, and also a large platter of chips." Johannes cleared his throat slightly. "They had changed the oil, and they were good chips. Anyway, Hagrid introduced us, and someone asked about Malcolm's work. Everyone at the table enjoyed hearing of Malcolm's recent encounter with a Knucker, all but Cam, and when we spoke of other things, of dragons and such, Cam was sceptical. And rude." Johannes shrugged. "I do not know what more to tell, though that seems incomplete."

Malcolm took up the tale from there, repeating the highlights of his stories and of Cam's more outrageous statements, culminating with the one that had pushed Hagrid over the edge. "Then the man says...and you have to know Hagrid to understand how much he admires Dumbledore...as we all do, in fact. But the man says...and pardon me, ladies, but I quote the man's own indelicate words here...he says, 'Let this great oaf here keep lappin' up yer tales, like he laps up crumbs at that old fool Dumbledore's table. I bet yeh did get a beatin' from the old man...and did yeh get a humpin' from him, too?' And that's when I couldna restrain Hagrid any longer, and he tipped up the table and began beating on Cam as Cam's brothers began to cast hexes at us all. Only poor Patch managed to drop out of sight fast enough...cowered behind Honnie here, didn't he?...and the rest of us tried to hold our own."

Malcolm's description of the rest of fight was only slightly exaggerated, Johannes found, and he did make his trick with the wood sound even more clever and dramatic than it actually was, but otherwise, it was accurate...though it seemed to take longer in the telling than the fight itself had lasted.

Just as Malcolm was crediting him with far more Healing skill than Johannes believed he had exercised, Lydia bustled in carrying a parchment in one hand and her wand in the other. Malcolm pulled on his front teeth, demonstrating how solidly they remained in his head.

"That is not to my credit, Malcolm," Johannes said. He turned to the others. "I did little. We visited Aggie Wayland that night, and then the next morning, we Apparated to St. Bridget's. They are to be credited."

"Aye, but you kept me from bleedin' half to death there in the lane," Malcolm said.

"Bleeding half to death? What is this?" Lydia asked, alarmed.

"Oh, Aunt Lydia," Malcolm replied, standing and putting his arm around her shoulders. "That is a tale...one that I am sure Grandmother Siofre would be quite happy to tell you!"

"Well, you seem fine now," Lydia said, looking up at him, slightly bewildered, "and I came to tell you that the dinner bell will be ringing soon, so if you'd like to freshen up beforehand, you ought to do that now."

Malcolm walked out of the parlour with Lydia, and Phoebe and Lachina followed. As Siofre rose to go, too, however, Johannes stood and reached for her, touching her arm lightly.

"I am sorry it was not I who told you of this. And I should have tried to keep Malcolm from the fight...but I did not know it would be a fight until it became one," Johannes said softly. "I haven't much experience with such things."

"Dinna worry, Honnie," Siofre said. "Any scolding wouldna be for you."

"Malcolm was very good. He protected me from several hexes. I might be as injured as the Cam brothers were if he had not done so."

"But you did well, too."

Johannes shook his head. "Only the way that Malcolm tells it. I am not adept. Although," he added with a small smile, "I was pleased to shackle the man Cam against the wall as I did. But otherwise . . . no."

"Nay, you did well, very well, Honnie," Siofre said. "You stood by Malcolm, and you stood by him even though you are not experienced with such things. You didn't crawl behind another and then disappear when the accounting came. You were Tyree in those moments, as truly as you could be."

"I would not have left Malcolm, naturally not," Johannes said. "But I am unfortunately of little assistance, and he was injured only because he was protecting me and had no time to shield against the hex that hit him."

"Dinna look so downcast! You did well, and Malcolm says that's so, as well. And that you're not experienced with brawls or duelling, that's not a bad thing at all. Not at all." Siofre raised one hand and placed it lightly on his shoulder. "You are . . . You encourage life, wherever you go. You nurture and protect. Not to be a fighter . . . that is a good thing for you." She slipped her hand down his chest, her palm resting over his heart. "You have a warmth in you, Honnie. Life and growth is what you're about. Dinna try to be otherwise. As you are . . . you are as you should be."

She began to withdraw her hand and to step back, but Johannes took it and held it gently in his.

"As long as I have not disappointed you," he said softly.

Siofre shook her head slightly. "Nay, not at all . . ."

"Siofre..."

"The dinner bell will ring shortly," Siofre said, withdrawing her hand from his, but then turning to stand beside him. She placed her hand on his arm. "You will escort me?"

Johannes nodded, and they stepped out through the open doors.

"And you must also tell me how your tour of the gardens was," Siofre said. "Lachina was telling me she had enjoyed it, but then Malcolm burst in, and so I never heard more."

"Ah, yes . . ." Johannes paused, adjusting to the sudden change in topic. "Lachina did seem to enjoy the gardens we were able to view before our tea...we had tea in the formal gardens, and Morgan and Fiona brought the children, too...however, she suggested that we complete our tour at a time when Phoebe might join us, perhaps this evening after dinner. We also hoped that you would join us, you and Lydia both."

"I am glad that Lachina enjoyed your tour, and I think it's a grand idea for Lydia to join you...and Malcolm, as well, if he stays...but I have a few things to finish this evening, and it has been a long day."

"We could tour tomorrow, rather, if you might accompany us then," Johannes said.

"Nay, I think not...there's much to do yet, both here for the parties and for that business with Butterworth. But you enjoy them."

"I will enjoy them less for lack of your company," Johannes said softly as they approached the dining room.

"There will be other times, Honnie," Siofre said, releasing his arm. "Now I believe I will wash my hands afore eating. You go in, though, see that the lasses are seated and comfortable when they arrive, eh?"

Johannes nodded, and Siofre turned and walked quickly away down the hall as Johannes gazed after her, a thoughtful expression on his face.