The Wisdom To Know The Difference

Big thanks to my wonderful beta, Nakhash Mekashefah who catches mistakes, Americanisms, and who has taught me a lot about proper punctuation, grammar, and canon.

A/N: About BDSM (skip this if you're not interested)

I've had a few people tell me this story has inspired 'experimentation'. This is cool, however I feel at this time I should include a note/disclaimer.

1) Safewords: If you want to play around with BDSM, and are new to the whole thing, I would strongly suggest a safeword. This story isn't a statement on safewords...the dispute between Hermione and Severus went deeper than that, the safeword issue was simply an issue that came up to depict the development of their relationship. I feel okay in them not using a safeword, because for this story, I know Snape. I'll say that in real life, I would only trust a Dom partner without a safeword if they were very experienced and knowledgeable about the human body and it's workings, physical, mental, and emotional, and I knew them well. Don't just take someone's word for proof of their experience/skill either.

2) I've been careful to depict safe practice of BDSM. Unlike certain novels, which were named earlier in the story, you won't find physically impossible or permanently damaging acts that amazingly leave the submissive able to walk afterwards, when in real life they would be headed for the emergency room. HOWEVER, I've also depicted a few things that should NOT be tried by beginners. Bullwhips, or single-tail whips, should ONLY be used by someone who really, really knows what they're doing. They require significant practice and skill to be used safely (for instance, there's a reason in the scene with the bullwhip that Severus had Hermione tie her hair up first. You may also notice a number of other things he's done for Hermione's safety...in the first intense bondage scene, for instance, he took her weight off her shoulders at regular intervals so as not to cause too serious muscle and joint strain). There are also certain implements which can only be safely used on certain areas of the body, while others are okay to use on a wider area. Incorrect use of some things can lead to serious injury. Very basic light bondage and spanking confined to the buttocks area is generally safe for newbies.

3) It's not about the implements of destruction and torture. They're tools, and BDSM can be practiced without expensive excursions to your local kink shop. (and things like ping-pong paddles, a simple leather strap, and a bundle of cotton rope can be had very cheaply too!).

4) There is a HUGE difference between a Dom carefully inflicting pain/discomfort on a submissive in a way to not cause injury, and an abusive person losing control and hitting someone in the face with a fist. There is no comparison between the two.

That out of the way, on with the story:

---

The halls of the Ministry of Magic seemed coldly impersonal to Hermione as they walked through them. No real justice could be found here. Of course, the fact that Draco Malfoy could afford the best barrister played a large part in the outcome of the trial. He'd been made out as a suffering, emotionally troubled young man who was merely acting out because of the traumas he'd experienced in his young life. The loss of his mother and then the loss of his father, through a full Obliviate, had been played to the hilt. If Hermione didn't already know what a slimy little ferret he was, she could have felt sorry for him from the case that was made.

Six months of house arrest with a once-a-week chaperoned outing...after all, it would be a shame for a young, promising man to not be able to do his shopping for books and other business. He also had no limits on visitors to his home. The final insult had been the judge. While he acknowledged the wrongs done to Hermione, he had looked to Draco, after giving him his sentence, and had said: "And, young Mr Malfoy, your father was always such a supporter of the Ministry, I do hope you will see it in your heart after this unpleasantness to continue in your fine father's footsteps."

Hermione glanced over to Severus, who seemed distant. His eyes looked straight ahead as they walked to the exit; he hadn't said a single word since giving his testimony of the attack. Fortunately, the counter charges of assault that Draco had pressed were dismissed. At least that was something.

Hermione and Severus squeezed into the callbox and waited for its ascent to street level. He still wasn't looking at her.

"Severus?" she prompted.

"What?" he responded dully.

"I'm glad the charges were dropped for you."

"As am I."

Silence fell again just as the callbox opened. It had been nearly a week since Hermione and Severus had come to a compromise, and things hadn't returned to the previous easy rapport, as Hermione saw it in hindsight. She was beginning to wish she had never found the articles on safewords and the various means of interpreting sexual sadomasochism. Really, she hadn't been unhappy...things had been slowly getting better between them; maybe ignorance really was bliss. She shook her head, wondering how she could think that. Ignorance was the last thing she wanted; she opposed ignorance on every level as a matter of pride. Ignorance couldn't ever be a good thing.

She wasn't paying attention as they walked down the street in Muggle London. They would be Apparating back soon, but Hermione didn't really want to go back right away. She didn't get away from Hogwarts for more than the support group meetings, and hadn't spent much time with Severus lately either. After that first night, they'd only had sex twice out of five nights.

"Would you like to stop somewhere for lunch before we get back?" she asked.

"I suppose we could."

"Great," Hermione said, infusing her voice with cheerfulness she didn't quite feel. "Do you like gyros?"

"Yee-ros?" Severus asked, looking at her directly for the first time since they'd left the courtroom. "Never heard of them."

"I was sure I smelled gyros when we first Apparated here, and I haven't had any in ages. They're very good: lamb meat in a flatbread with a yogurt sauce." Hermione stood at the intersection they had arrived at, looking around, sniffing the air slightly for the distinctive aroma.

"You look as if you're picking up habits from Lupin," Severus said dryly.

"I think it's that way," Hermione said, ignoring his comment as she looked both ways and began to cross the street. Severus walked alongside her.

It turned out she was right, and they found a small, slightly shabby Greek café two blocks up the road. The smell of roasting lamb loaf permeated the small restaurant. Hermione walked to the counter, quickly ordering two gyros; she paid for them out of her own wallet before Severus could. They took a seat at a small, chipped Formica-covered table in two metal folding chairs.

"I know we were both hoping for him to get something more for what he did," Hermione said.

"Do not concern yourself about Malfoy, Hermione. He won't try to harm you again, I can assure you that."

"What do you mean?" Hermione asked. Something about the assured way he spoke made her wonder if he might be planning something.

"I simply mean that I take my duty to protect you seriously; I won't have anything happening to you."

They were interrupted by a young man in his early twenties bringing their plates. Severus looked down at the mass of sliced lamb loaf, onion, tomato and yogurt sauce piled atop a steaming flatbread. He looked over as Hermione lifted hers with both hands, folded the bread together and took a bite. "Are there no eating utensils?" he asked, scowling.

"Use your hands," she said, just before a dollop of yogurt sauce dripped from her gyro and onto the front of her blouse. She dabbed at it with a napkin while Severus stood and walked to the counter. He returned with a fork and knife.

They ate in silence for a short time, until Hermione decided to ask: "Would you like to do something else today? We don't get out much...and you know, I was hoping maybe we could...well, do something outside Hogwarts."

"Not today, perhaps another time," he said flatly. He had yet another trial to attend the following afternoon, only it wasn't quite a trial, no...an inquiry before the Board of Governors. Dumbledore had looked over Hermione's grades and had noticed no change, nor any indication that he'd ever shown her favouritism. In fact, Dumbledore had chided him on his overly strict grading...the Headmaster felt that Hermione deserved a grade average several percentage points higher than what she actually had.

"Okay," she answered. Silence fell again as they both ate their lunch. "Severus, is something wrong?" Hermione asked.

"Why should anything at all be wrong?" he snapped.

"Well...you just seem...I don't know, distant. I thought now that things were back to normal, well..." she trailed off, shrugging as she took another bite of her nearly-completed sandwich.

He applied more pressure than really necessary to slice through the bread, before bringing a piece of meat and bread together on his fork to his mouth. 'Normal' was not the word he would have used to describe the state of their relationship. She still hadn't refused him, likely due to the fact that he'd only sought her attention twice more since she'd returned to his bed, but it was a tension hanging over his head. Which time would it be...would she wait until he wanted to really take the time to enjoy her before she refused him?

Meeting her eyes momentarily, he said, "I'm not sure what it is you were expecting." He returned his attention to his meal, stabbing a tomato and placing it on the side of his plate. He did save the yogurt sauce from it, as it was quite good. Not exactly fine fare, but a decent enough fast meal.

"I was hoping," Hermione said, disrupting his contemplations, "maybe on the way back we could stop off at that place in Knockturn Alley?"

Now what is she playing at? he wondered. "And what is it you are so eager to purchase?"

"Well...I'd hoped you might have a suggestion," she replied, almost flirtatiously. He narrowed his eyes at her. Yes, I'm sure...and what of the next time you have a problem with my suggestions, will you threaten once more to leave me? That, above all else, rankled him. Not even four months married, and she'd already threatened to leave him.

He took another bite, looping a sliver of meat with an onion on his fork, before he looked back to her. Her eyebrows were raised slightly, and she was giving him a small, hopeful looking smile. "I really must be getting back soon. I have work that needs to be done." Her smile drooped, and she went back to finishing her gyro, this time leaning over her plate so as not to spill any sauce on herself.

"Severus," she said softly, "I never said I wasn't willing."

"No, I don't suppose you did."

"Well then...what's the problem?"

Severus looked over to her again, jaws clenched. She looked puzzled...she likely thought that returning to his bed meant that there would be no further problems between them; that he would simply forget about her going back on her word. He'd thought, before he finally relented, perhaps giving in would solve something. After all, she did say she was willing to do as he said...or, she would be willing most of the time. "The problem, Hermione...the problem...I don't suppose you would understand," he said.

"So now you think I'm an idiot as well as weak?" she hissed at him.

"We should be going back to Hogwarts now," he said, glancing down at their empty plates. "The Headmaster was interested to hear how the trial went." He stood, stepping away from the table and towards the door. He glanced back at Hermione, who was still seated. "Well, are you coming?"

In tense silence, they walked to an Apparition point in an alley and Apparated back to Hogwarts. "Severus, listen...are you still mad?" Hermione asked as they walked through the gates of the grounds.

"I'm not angry," he said in a clipped tone.

"For someone who isn't angry, you're sure acting like it!" Hermione exclaimed, jogging to catch up with his long strides.

"Lower your voice...there are students about," Severus hissed.

"Not that many, and they're all far away." It was after lunch, and some of the students who had a free period (and any who would normally have Potions class at that time) were not in class, and some were walking around the grounds, a few hand in hand. "Besides, we're married, it's not as if married people never talk in public."

Severus stopped and spun around, nearly causing Hermione to collide into him. "I am a professor at this school and a Head of House, as you well know, and I cannot have the reputation for bickering with my teenaged, student wife in public! If you wish to discuss something, we can do it in the privacy of our quarters later. Now, I have a meeting with the Headmaster, and you have things you should be attending to as well. I will see you this evening," he said in a low voice, before turning around and stalking into the castle.

She spotted Harry and Ron walking towards her after Severus had entered the large front doors of Hogwarts, both with concerned looks on their faces. "Hermione? Is something wrong?" Harry asked as they approached.

"Why should anything at all be wrong? Draco Malfoy has house arrest for six months, so I suppose justice was served for the poor deprived boy who was only acting out his grief over his parents; I dropped yogurt sauce on my blouse, and now...ohhh," she growled in frustration. "It's nothing, really...I'm sorry for snapping at you," she apologised at seeing the shocked looks on their faces. "At least the charges against Severus were dropped." Ron looked befuddled and uncomfortable, as did Harry, but Harry still walked closer to her.

"Hermione, um...want to take a walk or something?" he asked.

Hermione closed her eyes, sighed deeply, then looked at Harry again. "That would be nice, actually. Wait, you two both have class in a little while, don't you?"

"It's just Divination," Harry said, shrugging. "Besides, last class Ron predicted I would have a sudden illness and would miss an important revelation," he said, laughing.

The three of them all laughed together at that. "Yeah, but where's my excuse? You predicted I'd find great fortune and good health," Ron said, glaring in mock-accusation.

"You guys, the only reason you're still taking that is for an easy grade."

"Yeah," they both said in unison, nodding. About that time Parvati Patil passed by, smiling at Ron. Hermione saw how Ron smiled back, blushing.

"You're coming to Divination, right, Ron?" Parvati asked.

"Yeah, I'll be right there," he answered, grinning as she walked away. He turned back to Harry and Hermione. "Oh...uh."

"You both need to get to class," Hermione chided. "Go on guys, I'll talk to you later."

They both nodded and left as Hermione walked over to a grassy spot of fresh clover at the edge of a large slope and sat down, looking out over the lake and the Forbidden Forest. She startled slightly when there was a sudden movement to her right. She looked over and saw Harry.

"Aren't you supposed to be in class?"

"Yes, but, it won't hurt to skip a class once," he said. "Besides, if I'm not there, Ron can team up with Parvati and they can predict beautiful futures together," he said with a dreamy look on his face. Hermione smacked him on the shoulder.

"Ow!" Harry said. "Besides, I figured we haven't spent much time together lately, and I wanted to catch up, and you look like you could use a little goofing off for a change."

"I suppose so," Hermione agreed. They fell into the comfortable silence that good friends share together, looking out over the trees and the water. "So...how are things with you and Snape...or I guess you call him Severus, now."

"Yeah, but that's Professor Snape to you, Mr Potter," she said playfully. She then sobered. "Well, Harry, this has certainly been...different."

"How so?" Harry asked, scooting closer when he saw her shiver in a gust of cool wind. He pulled off his outer robe and settled it around her shoulders.

"Thanks, Harry. Well...it's hard to say, exactly. Severus is...difficult."

"Yeah...so tell me something I didn't already know."

Hermione chuckled as she pulled Harry's robe around her knees, crossing her arms over them. "Well, where to start? I think he's mad at me now."

"Why?"

"It's hard to explain."

"It's even harder if you don't try."

"Really? I wouldn't have thought..." she said wryly. "Okay...but, to try...back before we got married...there was this...um, thing...that he wanted to talk to me about. It was...how to put it...a little...different."

"I'm going to start keeping track of how many times you say the word 'different' and don't tell me what it means."

"Anyway..." she continued, ignoring his quip, "he wanted me to agree to something before we got married. And, at the time, I didn't really think it would be a big deal...but, it turned out to be a bigger deal than I thought it would be...and now, well...we had a big row about it over Christmas break. Last week, I thought we finally settled it. But, now I find out he's still mad."

"Hmmm," Harry hummed thoughtfully.

"We're basically stuck with each other. We could live separately, but we can't ever...um, be with anyone else, so, basically I make it work with him, or we're both alone."

"Oh yeah, I remember that," Harry said, scratching his head.

"So...now, I want to make it work, and I don't want him mad at me. Because before we had the disagreement, things were actually going fairly well."

"Hmmm."

"Yeah, that's helpful."

"Well, sorry...I still don't know what the problem is. Maybe if I knew what it was that was so important that he asked you to agree to, I might be able to understand."

"Ahhh...I can't really say."

"Oh, come on, Hermione, you want me to play twenty questions? What, is he some kind of sexual freak?" he asked, laughing. "Actually, I don't think I'd want to know about that anyway; if that's it, don't tell me." He grimaced, then shook his head as if to clear unwanted images from his head.

"Since when did you get interested in helping me be happy with Severus? I thought you were still upset," Hermione said quickly, steering him away from the subject. She wasn't about to talk about the intimate details of her sex life with Harry, even if the sex were somewhat more on the normal side. At least he didn't want to hear.

"No, Hermione. I want you to be happy," he said, laying an arm around her shoulders and giving her a squeeze. "Besides," he said in a lower voice, "Ron told me if I didn't stop acting like a complete prat, he'd kick my arse." They both laughed again. Hermione smiled as she put an arm around Harry's waist, giving him a reciprocal squeeze. It felt good to share a good time with him again. It felt good, too, to tuck her head under his chin and just sit quietly in the cool, spring breeze.

"He's not being really mean to you or anything like that, is he? I mean, I know he's a prat in class, but you said he isn't like that all the time, right?" he asked, rubbing her back.

"No...he's not mean...he's just difficult sometimes. In a way he's in just as much of a predicament as I am, I suppose."

"Yeah, well, I'm here for you if you ever want to talk about it more, you know?"

"Thanks, Harry," she said quietly after several moments.

"Hey, anytime. You want to go inside now? It's getting cold out here and you've got my robe."

"Good idea...let's go down to my room; if you're going to skip class, you won't get caught there."

"Okay," Harry agreed. They got up and walked inside together. "You're sure you're okay? Since when would you be helping me break rules?" he asked.

"Well, after today, I'm a little disillusioned about rules."

*****

From a window above the main entrance, Severus Snape stood in a corridor looking out over the grounds of Hogwarts. All but two of the students had returned to classes. He could see quite well how Hermione and Potter sat closely together, smiling and laughing, talking easily together. A man inclined to be overly jealous would probably be very angry to see his wife sharing an embrace with another man. But, because of the binding spells, Severus had no need to worry about infidelity. He wondered for a moment if he would be worried if the binding spells weren't in place. He knew, however, if Potter was out to take his wife's affections, he was at least smart enough not to try it in open view.

Despite his earlier protest to Hermione, he was still angry: angry with Hermione for threatening to leave him if he didn't compromise; at himself, for giving in so easily, and he especially didn't like the fact that she still seemed unaware of the significance of his compromise. It was a moment of weakness on his part, he decided. He'd begun to regret it after their union when they were bathing together.

Though he'd been very glad when he returned to his bedroom that night and found her as he had requested her to be, as well as being pleased to discover the next day she'd shaved her pubic area again, at least she showed willingness to comply. But, Hermione had seemed to have an air about her: that she'd won something, that she'd put him in his place.

Before her excursion on that Muggle device, he had very much enjoyed being with her. It had been a delight to watch her as he made her squirm or caused her to find pleasure in something she didn't think she would enjoy. The surprise in her eyes after the time he'd taken her arse had been wonderful to see, especially after the fear and discomfort she had obviously felt beforehand.

And then, the way she had submitted to his punishments and tests was just as enjoyable. Before, her inner battle as she fought to do as she was told, to overcome her aversion to pain, the thrill he felt when she finally would accept the pain along with the pleasure, the moments when he truly felt as if he held her life, her safety in his hands. But most of all, the look in her eyes in those times when she was happy to have pleased him. While past lovers had been more adept and experienced, able to withstand quite extreme acts, Hermione's inexperienced determination was more appealing.

What would happen if he wanted something of her, and she didn't want to try it? He still would punish her for going back on their agreement; he still wanted to bend her to his will...not break her, but bend her ever so slowly and gently, like training a plant to grow in a certain shape. Move too quickly, and the branch would snap...but if you never pushed, it would never bend to the desired shape. Sometimes, the process could be a bit of a strain. Now that she had an easy way out, he wasn't sure she would be up for the strain.

He decided it was time to test her. He hadn't demanded much of her since she'd returned. Now he needed to know if she really was weak, or if it had just been one of those moments...she was still young, after all. He had to know what she was made of; she'd proved willing enough previously, as well as able enough. The situation may yet be salvageable if certain things were made clear to her.

He still didn't like the possibility of being refused in his own bed...but that might not be such a difficult thing to get around. Before, he hadn't pressed her too much when she had studies, or when she might be too tired. There might be things she would balk at doing, but if he presented it right, appealing to her Gryffindor bravado, making it a challenge or a dare...while at the same time continuing to be aware of her moods and those times she would rather sleep or be alone, he decided he could very well never have to hear her say no. It might be a bit more of a challenge, but there was no need to worry. He was nearly twice her age and had much more experience than she did...it would be an easy enough thing to ensure.

*****

Harry had left Hermione's room to go to Quidditch practice at three o'clock. She felt a bit guilty at aiding him in skipping class for nothing more than sitting around and talking; maybe it was selfish of her. But, even if she wasn't going to share the details of her problems with Severus, knowing that he was there for her as a friend and had gotten over his personal issues about her marriage, helped a lot.

Hermione had been excused from all her classes for the day of the trial, and so she decided she should be revising. However, she found it hard to concentrate on her studies...Severus's words from the previous week kept running through her head.

"I thought you were stronger than that."

That had surprised her. When he'd said it, she hadn't been feeling particularly strong...the fact that he would notice and care made her wonder.

"...you've made me wonder if I had overestimated your capabilities. In fact, perhaps when I helped you with your Arithmancy calculations, I misled you into a path you weren't capable of handling..."

Her Arithmancy calculations had played a large part in her decision to choose Severus over Kingsley Shacklebolt. It had served the Order well in coming up with a way to defeat Voldemort. At the time, she'd been in such shock over the entire situation that she'd put her trust in numbers and equations. She felt she could trust equations...they didn't feel, they didn't think...they simply were. It was truth at its most basic.

So what had he meant about misleading her? She thought his calculations were good...she'd checked and double-checked them. She opened her desk drawers and, after rifling through the stacks of papers, found the parchment with the equations. Now, nearly five months since she'd put them away, she checked them over again, paying close attention to the numerals and symbols he had written.

She was surprised to find, after some more quick checking, just what he had meant by what he wrote. He did believe she was strong at that time.

"If that is the case, then I...apologise for not seeing that at the time."

He apologised. Severus never apologised...so why would he do so over some numbers? Pulling out a separate sheet of paper, Hermione began the equation anew, but with a few changes. Once she had identified the numerals which represented her perceived resiliency...(discovering numerals for both physical and mental resiliency)...she changed them to reflect what would have happened if the numbers reflected someone of weaker constitution.

Deciding to look at it from all sides, she also recalculated the equation for the possible future with Kingsley Shacklebolt. When she saw the answers taking shape, her heart began to pound and she broke out in a sweat.

It really had been important.

"Well then, I suppose I shouldn't expect a Gryffindor to live up to her promises. It's all bravado masquerading as courage with you lot."

But, it was just a moment...just a moment when she'd felt weak, as if it were too much to handle, when she wanted to just give up. Just a moment. Everyone had those, right? She looked down at the calculation for her potential future with Kingsley...amazingly, when she changed the numbers, giving herself less credit than she thought she deserved for courage (and less than Severus had thought at the time) the results were markedly different. It looked like an ideal future, happy times, and great potential for success. She had also changed her projections in the equation on how important a career was to her...less desire for independence.

Why would that make such a difference for the better with Kingsley? At the time she thought it was all about him...now she was starting to realise it wasn't about him, rather how she faced him. Did that mean Kingsley needed a weak person to be happy with?

No...that wasn't right either. She didn't want to make judgements like that...people were different. Someone with less desire for independence and less courage and physical fortitude wasn't necessarily a lesser person...they were just different.

"Running blindly into something and then realising it's not quite what you thought it would be seems to be adequate justification to go back on your word."

Was this really all about an agreement to him, or was there more involved? And still, she wondered why it was such a big deal to him. The scenario she now saw in the calculation with the changed numbers resulted in a frightening outcome for her future with Severus.

That didn't make sense to her. He wanted someone to submit to him; he wanted someone to do as he told them. He had a tendency to tell her what to do all the time, too, not just in the bedroom. Wouldn't he be happier with someone who tended to be meek, someone who would just do what he said without question or concern?

."Appearances can be deceiving." ... "Deception is quite...disappointing"

Deception...did it all came down to deception?

So, if he had thought she was stronger, if she'd appeared stronger, but then he thought it was just a false appearance, a mask of strength to cover a weak core...well, she really would be in serious trouble based on this. The possibility for a happy future, with the new figures, was bleak indeed.

Hermione put her quill down and rubbed her temples. She thought the new figures were wrong. At least she hoped so. She did think she was stronger than that, and if Severus had figured on it, then there must be a good reason for it. She just had to find out what that reason was.

When she heard the door to the living room open and then close, she decided it was time to find out. She gave him a few moments while she checked the equations again, forming a few theories. She could understand the need for physical strength, certainly. It was the rest of it that confused her.

She got up and went into the living room, where she found Severus looking over some parchments at his desk. When he saw her enter, he rolled them up and set them aside. "I see Potter isn't skipping classes to spend time with you, now. As a professor of this school, if you're going to make a regular habit of assisting your friends in shirking their classes I will have to take appropriate steps. I cannot turn a blind eye to misbehaviour simply because we are married."

"I understand," she answered. Perhaps it would be better to accept that he was a professor, and she shouldn't put him in a position where he had to choose between acting as a professor and acting in the bounds of their relationship. "I was wondering if we could talk about something."

"Have you calmed yourself since we returned?" he asked.

"Yes, I have." She walked to the couch and sat down. "Would you come sit with me?" His eyebrows rose a moment as he observed her. "Please," she added.

Severus stood and crossed the room. "If this is going to be a long conversation, perhaps you would like a drink?"

"I'd rather keep my head clear, thanks."

Severus poured a glass for himself from the decanter of brandy and took a seat next to Hermione. "There are a few things I wish to discuss with you as well." He took a sip from his tumbler and turned to face Hermione.

"First, if you threaten to leave me again over a dispute," he said, voice cold and icy, "I will help you pack your bags at that very moment. Is that plain enough?"

Hermione blinked, swallowing thickly. That wasn't what she'd expected. "Um...okay...but-"

"No 'buts'. I will not be drawn into a game such as that. If that is what it comes down to, then I would prefer to separate and meet weekly until the marriage law is repealed. I have lived with periods of celibacy for a fairly long time and would rather rely on my hand for gratification than live with that threat surfacing again. If you are concerned that I haven't been acting 'normal' it is because of the lack of consideration and maturity you've shown me by making that threat. I've spent these last days considering what to do about that."

His words stung, but Hermione didn't let it show. She thought she'd gained something; she thought she'd finally showed him that she had certain limits and wouldn't back down. Instead, he'd taken it wrong. "Severus, I'm sorry you took it that way...it's just that at the time, I wasn't sure what else I could say. But, if it bothered you so much, why did you..."

"I hoped that we might simply go on as we had before, but I regretted that almost as soon as I'd granted it. As far as I'm concerned, you still must prove yourself willing to submit to me, and a request to go shopping for toys is not sufficient proof."

Hermione ran a hand through her bushy hair, scowling. Not sufficient proof? She'd gone back to his bed, she'd accepted doing what she could to please him sexually. "Then what would be?" she finally asked.

"I trust you haven't forgotten what I told you several weeks ago?" His casual phrasing belied the import he placed on his previous words.

She remembered...their heated conversation and equally heated coupling after her concussion. "No...I haven't forgotten...I wondered when you would bring it up."

"Ahh, yes...you see, Hermione, by demanding the compromise you did, you've now taken responsibility for living up to your agreements. I shan't begin certain things with you if you might simply decide to stop at an...inconvenient point. If you wish to earn my respect and assure me that you truly will live up to your word, you will come to me and tell me when you are ready and willing to accept your punishment. I will be very disappointed if you keep me waiting long. Understood?"

"Yes, I understand," she said, her stomach churning with nervousness.

"There was something else I've been waiting for as well," he added, turning to gaze into the fireplace. His shoulders were held stiffly. Hermione wondered for a moment what it was, then she remembered. An apology. Did he really deserve an apology?

Hermione wasn't about to apologise for something for which she didn't believe she was wrong. However, to him, she realised, it came down to the simple matter of an agreement. She'd agreed, and then she'd gone back on that. She didn't regret questioning him...she did, however, regret the way she'd done that, and she decided she could apologise for her methods as well as the points where she'd been unreasonable. She cleared her throat softly, and began. "Then...I apologise. I was wrong to question you in the way I did." She glanced quickly at him to judge his reaction, but his profile was still hard. "I should have been more...respectful with my questions."

"Is that all?" he asked quietly.

"No," she said, taking a deep breath and swallowing her pride. She felt as if she was about to hold her heart out on a platter to him to crush or spare as he saw fit. "I also apologise for accusing you of lying to me. You didn't...I just-"

"Adding justifications to an apology seriously causes me to doubt your sincerity," Severus cut in before she could try to reason her actions to him.

"All right...I won't then." She didn't have to explain it to him, she understood now why she'd acted as she did, and it was still inexcusable. She was trying to understand his perspective more, to understand him more. It made a difference. While he could have told her more, given her books, perhaps...something...he didn't exactly lie. In the literal sense he'd told her exactly what he expected, and that wasn't a lie. She would simply have to be careful not to infer more than what he meant.

"Are you going to apologise for questioning me?" he asked, turning to look at her expectantly.

"I'm sorry for the way I questioned you...and for accusing you of lying," she said carefully. "I'm not sorry that I had questions, but if I have them in the future, I promise I'll be respectful about it." She met his eyes, waiting to see what would come next. She hoped he would accept, because she wasn't going to apologise for having questions.

"Very well then, that is sufficient. I accept." He continued to watch her; Hermione had the strong feeling he was waiting for her to say something else and, as one brow rose in expectation, she knew what it was.

She glanced down at her hands a moment, then back up to look him in the eye. There was a constricting feeling in her abdomen, but she forged on...she was brave and she would prove it. "I will submit for..." she took a deep breath, "...punishment..." there...that wasn't so hard to say now, "for that...whenever is good for you." There, she said it. It was out and, whatever came, she would prove to him she wasn't about to back down.

"Good. Now, what was it you wanted to talk to me about?" Hermione blinked a few times, waiting for her pounding heart to slow. She'd almost expected to be carted off at that moment. "Are you sure you don't want a drink, Hermione?" Severus asked, smirking at her, looking thoroughly amused as he stood and went to re-fill his brandy tumbler.

"Oh...yes, I'll have a drink then." She felt like she needed one anyway...the adrenaline rush had left her feeling slightly woozy, and she felt a bit shaky. She waited as he poured a second tumbler and brought it to her, sitting down again next to her. She nearly jumped when he placed a hand gently on her thigh.

"So, that's all cleared up then?" she asked.

"If you can prove to me that you will submit, then yes."

Hermione nodded, raising the tumbler to her lips with a sense of relief that maybe now things would be back to 'normal'...even if it wasn't a typical sort of normal. The brandy burned her throat and nearly made her cough, but she felt better now.

"I was doing some thinking about what you said last week, about the Arithmancy."

"Were you? And what conclusions have you reached?" he asked conversationally, his previous anger already gone.

"Well, I'd kept the papers, so I went over the calculations again and re-figured them. I have to say I think there is a big difference from...well, a moment of feeling a bit out of sorts...I was under a lot of stress. Anyway, there's a difference between that and really being weak." She glanced over to him, looking for any sign he would say something, but he merely sat, his glass of brandy in his hand resting on his knee and his eyes seeming as dark tunnels. She started to look away since he still unnerved her with that gaze, but she met his eyes.

"I don't think the equations were wrong when you worked them. But, when I changed the calculations it made a very big difference and I wanted to ask you why."

"Really."

"Yes, well...you see, it seems like you would rather have someone who's a bit more...on the meek side anyway, what with the way you are."

Severus took a sip of his brandy, not taking his eyes from hers. "And why would you think that, Hermione?"

"Well...wouldn't a meek person...well, wouldn't they get along with what you tell them what to do easier?"

"They might. But, why do you think I would desire a meek person."

"You don't?"

"There is a difference between meekness and submission. Someone who simply does what they are told because they are too afraid to do differently is weak. Most especially a woman who doesn't stand up for what is right, who cowers and allows someone to harm another because she is too afraid to do what should be done." His voice grew low as he spoke, yet was infused with emotion...anger. His jaws clenched tightly for a moment as he looked into the flames of the fireplace. "A weak woman will never have my respect nor would she ever bear a child for me," he added in a near-whisper.

Hermione shivered suddenly, wondering what had brought on his turn in mood. "Why do you feel so strongly about that?" she asked.

He shot a glance towards her, but then looked quickly back to the flames. "I have my reasons," he said in a clipped tone. Hermione knew the end of a subject when she heard it, but now her curiosity at why he felt that way had grown. She determined to find out. For the time being, however, she sipped her brandy and looked into the flames, alongside him, reaching over and resting her hand on his thigh and squeezing lightly. He tensed momentarily, but then glanced over to her, lips pursed, before he seemed to dismiss a thought.

"Dinner will be in half an hour," he observed, looking at the clock. "I've been curious, Hermione; what happened to the robes I gave you at Christmas?"

"They're in my room," Hermione answered after a moment.

"Hmm." He finished his brandy. "I will see you after dinner, there is something I must attend to now."

*****

Chicken and herbed dumplings were waiting when she arrived, slightly late, for dinner. She found an empty space between Ginny Weasley and a third year Gryffindor girl who'd always been very quiet. "Hey, I was wondering if you would make it. Ron and Harry told me about the trial," Ginny said.

"Well, I was afraid something like that might happen. But, at least it's something." Hermione shrugged as she began filling a bowl.

"Did you go shopping today? I've never seen you wear that before."

"Oh...Severus gave it to me at Christmas."

"He did? Wow...I didn't know he'd bought you clothes. That's a good sign."

"You think so?" Hermione asked after she'd swallowed a lump of dumpling.

"Definitely. Either that, or he doesn't like your regular clothes. At least he's taking an interest."

"He doesn't like Muggle clothes is all, I'm sure," she said flippantly.

Up at the High Table, Severus had watched Hermione enter the Great Hall. It seemed appealing to her Gryffindor honour and bravado was a good way to go. The question was: how far would it work? Perhaps he would now convince her to choose his way all the time. Yes, first she wears proper clothing...and next, what more? He smiled as he thought about what that might mean. Perhaps soon enough he'd be waking in a very pleasant way on a regular basis.

*****

At nearly ten o'clock, Severus looked up from his book that he'd been reading in bed when Hermione entered the bedroom. She looked at him, swallowed, then continued to her side of the bed. He swept his eyes along her body, deliberately letting her see that. "Are you ready?" he asked.

"Yes," she said, voice tight.

"You do realise your punishment will be difficult." His voice was stern.

He watched her inhale deeply. "Yes," she answered firmly.

"Good. But not tonight," he said, looking back down at the book propped up on his knees. He had to resist laughing as she stopped; he could feel her eyes on him. Perhaps it would be even more fun now that she knew she held the responsibility for living up to her promises.

The bed shifted as she climbed in, and he heard her deep sigh as she settled between the sheets. He read a few moments, glancing over to Hermione, who was staring up at the canopy of the bed, something of a scowl on her face.

"Disappointed?" he asked.

"Not exactly. Just...I figured...never mind. What are you reading?" Severus tilted the front cover so she could read the title.

"I would think you'd know the Hogwarts rulebook front and back by now," she said after seeing the title.

"Just double-checking a few things."

Hermione got out of bed, returning a moment later with a book of her own. She settled back into bed and opened the book, removing a bookmark, and began reading.

"And what is your book?"

"Job: A Comedy of Justice. It's about this guy who keeps getting shifted between alternate universes and everything keeps going wrong for him. Just when he thinks things are going well, everything changes and he has to start all over again...it's mostly about dealing with problems, retaining your identity and values when everything is going wrong. It's a good book, you should read it."

"Sounds a bit too close to reality to me," he scoffed, and returned to reading up on the format of staff inquires and what rules might apply to him and how to defend himself on the morrow. Never before had there been the problem of a Professor answering charges of favouritism towards his wife.

*****

"Never before has there been the problem of a Professor showing favouritism towards his wife!" the rather portly wizard declared. Severus raised an eyebrow at the rather obvious statement. "And we won't stand for it here at Hogwarts! You, sir, by marrying a student, have caused serious concerns for many parents who have contacted us. Several students have even contacted their parents with reports that you have asked your wife to stay after class on several occasions. Now, I am not alone in questioning the appropriateness of that action."

"Now, now, Mr Greenwood, I assure you that Professor Snape has kept his relationship with his wife completely out of the classroom," Albus Dumbledore said firmly, but Severus caught the look he gave him, as if he were hoping it was the truth. "I've also independently graded Hermione Snape's papers and found no show of favouritism. She has always been at the top of her class, and the fact that she continues to be is no reflection of wrongdoing for either of them. Madam Snape was in quite a predicament with the passing of the Marriage Law, and Professor Snape's proposal was something that would have never happened had it not been for that law. He has never, in all his years as a teacher, given me any reason to think he might behave inappropriately with his students."

"That may be, but his actions with Draco Malfoy concern us as well. We believe that he would not have acted as he did if it were a matter of students simply arguing. His actions show clearly that he cannot maintain a professional distance in matters which concern his wife."

"I'll have you know," Severus began in a low voice, "that Draco Malfoy was not simply bickering with my wife. He attacked her and intended to do her grievous harm." He was growing agitated. Though the proceedings hadn't carried on for very long, it was growing more and more obvious that this was about appearances and not facts. At least the suggestion to bring Hermione in for questioning hadn't been exercised.

When that had been brought up, he'd regretted not revealing the fact that he would be undergoing an inquiry about his perceived misdeeds concerning her. At least then she might be prepared for possible questions about having ever been offered rewards in return for sexual favours. A Gryffindor with no sense of subtlety wouldn't handle something like that very well, even if it were Hermione.

"And according to the report from his trial, Madam Snape was the one who fought off his attack. The charges against you for assault may have been dropped, but you clearly crossed the line. What will it be next time? Will you next begin issuing detentions when other students call her names, perhaps?"

"Of course not, that is her business to handle at her discretion and within the school rules, just as it would be for any other student."

"You may say that, but it is still our desire to retain the appearance of propriety for the concerned parents of the students. I move that Severus Snape be removed from his position as Head of Slytherin. He may continue to teach Potions, but another Head of House should be appointed immediately. All in favour?"

"Now, let's not be hasty-" Dumbledore began, but was cut off by a witch sitting next to him at the long table.

"A movement has been made, and once made, must be voted upon. He's had his chance to speak, and now we vote."

There was a chorus of 'Aye's' from around the table.

"All opposed?" Mr Greenwood asked, looking around expectantly. Two 'No's' were heard: Dumbledore, and another who Severus remembered as a Slytherin a few years ahead of him in school.

"Very well, the matter is settled. Headmaster, we give you two weeks to appoint a new Head of Slytherin – I believe there are two other former Slytherins teaching here?"

"That is correct," Dumbledore said grimly.

"Good. Headmaster, Professor, good day." The Head of the Board of Governors stood and walked out of the staff room, as the others on the Board stood and followed him. Severus stayed seated, staring down at the table.

"Severus, I'm sorry," Dumbledore said after a long silence.

"It is of no matter. I'd planned to retire from teaching soon at any rate. I would recommend professor Vector for the position of Head of Slytherin."

"You're the best Potions master we've had in a very long time, Severus. I hope you'll stay on. Don't make any hasty decisions now, please. I'm sure with time I can turn this decision around."

Without another word, Severus Snape stood and left the staff room. He walked quickly to the dungeons, not pausing to find reasons to deduct house points from students. His quarters were empty, and he was glad Hermione was probably somewhere else at the moment. The last thing he wanted was her bothering him. He stood in the middle of his living room, looking around. It had been his home for eighteen years.

Eighteen years of work, wasted. Never mind the fact that he'd planned on resigning soon anyway. He'd been forced from his position. He knew it wasn't Hermione's fault, but he couldn't help but feel angry with her, Dumbledore, too. He'd had to leave the room before he was in danger of doing something he might regret. No, this was Dumbledore's fault. Hermione might be a factor, but it was Dumbledore who had urged him to submit the petition.

He thought for a moment about the timing, the state of his bank account, and his possibility of finding gainful employment outside Hogwarts. At least Hermione would be graduating. He only had four months remaining, four months of students sniggering at him for his humiliation and whispering rumours about the reasons he'd been forced to leave his position. The Headmaster would likely try to put a positive spin on the situation, but Heads of Houses didn't suddenly step down in the middle of term. He realised, also, that it was likely his pay would be reduced now that he'd been demoted.

"Blast!" he bellowed, and withdrew his wand and fired a curse, not caring that it mostly destroyed his couch.

He didn't feel any better when his rage-clouded vision cleared and he saw the damage he'd done. With long strides, he left his quarters, the dungeons, and went for a walk towards the Forbidden Forest.

*****

Lucius Malfoy peered out the window of the carriage pulled by invisible horses. He looked down at the floorboard where he'd packed the things he'd gathered while living at St. Mungo's. It was a small bag, containing a few books given to him by the nurses and a few knick-knacks from some of the other patients he'd come to know. He hadn't really wanted to leave yet, but his son Draco insisted he was fine and would recover more quickly at home. His nurses had been sad to see him go, and there had even been a small party for him before he left.

"Almost didn't think I was going to get you out of that place," Draco said.

"The doctor said I should stay a while longer, did he not?" Lucius said, running a hand through his hair, which almost came to the middle of his neck now. He had seen his old pictures and thought he looked better with longer hair.

"When you see our home, you'll be glad to be out of that place. The pictures don't do it justice."

"It looked very big in the pictures."

"It is. There is something I'll show you when we get there, Father. You've been reading the books I gave you, right?"

"Yes, I read them all."

"There are more at home, too. I still haven't found your journal...but I will keep looking. I did find some things, though...it's a way you used to store some favourite memories. I have to admit I couldn't resist peeking," Draco said, smirking. "There are some very interesting things there. Just one thing: Snape is in some of them...don't let him fool you, though. He's the one who did this to you; he's the one who erased your memories, and he's going to pay."

"I see, Draco," Lucius said, knitting his brows together and turning to look back out over the passing countryside. Soon enough, the winding road and meadows gave way to trees, growing thicker as they progressed. It was dark under the canopy of thick trees, which were just beginning to bud and sprout. After a time, they came to a gate that opened as the carriage approached, closing behind them with a heavy clang once they entered. Lucius felt a growing excitement as the trees thinned, and then they came into another open meadow and he looked out over the rolling hills and the centrepiece of that luscious meadow.

It was beautiful. He watched the large Manor as they drew closer, passing elaborate gardens and mazes of bushes. When they finally came to a stop before the grand entrance and stepped out of the carriage, he looked up to the great doors emblazoned by a knot work of snakes.

"I'm home," he sighed. It was home...he didn't remember anything specific about it, but it felt right.

"Yes, Father, we're home."

Lucius smiled as his son placed a hand on his shoulder, squeezing firmly. He still wasn't completely comfortable with Draco, but he, too, was familiar.

*****

Hermione entered the Great Hall with her friends for dinner Thursday evening. They'd spent the afternoon after classes revising together. They took their usual seats at Gryffindor table along with the other seventh-years.

"Not corned beef," Ron whinged as food appeared on serving platters. Large slabs of sliced corned beef filled the platters, along with large bowls of mashed potatoes and boiled cabbage.

"Good evening, students!" Headmaster Dumbledore called out. The murmur of voices quieted as they all stilled and looked towards the Headmaster. "I have an announcement to make. There is to be a new appointment for Head of Slytherin, brought on by a decision of the Board of Governors." The Hall filled with collective gasps and murmurs. Hermione looked over to Severus, who was sitting stiffly at his place, hands under the table, looking straight ahead over the body of students. "Professor Vector, our Arithmancy teacher and Slytherin alumni, will be taking over the position as Head of Slytherin at this time. So please, I ask you to show your appreciation for our new Head of Slytherin House!"

There was scattered applause as Professor Vector stood and smiled at the Slytherin table, mixed with a growing roar of students talking amongst themselves. Hermione looked around and noticed the Slytherins ran the gambit of reactions...the younger students seemed concerned, while she noticed smug smiles on the faces of Pansy Parkinson and Millicent Bulstrode.

"Professor Snape will continue in his position as Potions master, and I want it known that this change is not due to any transgression on his part. As I'm sure you all know, the Board of Governors sometimes makes decisions for the school solely at their discretion. He has served as Head of Slytherin quite splendidly for many years, and his service to Hogwarts has been long appreciated."

"Hermione, what's going on?" Harry asked.

"I don't know...Severus didn't say anything to me about this," Hermione replied. She continued to look around the Hall as the chatter settled down. She watched as Severus stiffly began eating his food, still not looking at any of the students. She turned back to the table, lost in thought. She'd been hungry, but now her appetite was gone. She grabbed a few slices of bread and quickly made a sandwich, then hurried from the Great Hall, ignoring her friends inquiring after her.

She was shocked when she saw the damage to the couch. She pulled out her wand and, with a few spells, managed to repair it. She sat on the repaired couch and waited for Severus, picking at her roast-beef sandwich.

About half an hour later, he entered.

"Severus, what happened?" she asked with concern as she stood from the couch. She stilled when she saw him; the very air around him seemed to crackle with energy. "Severus?"

"I would prefer some peace and quiet at this time," he said very quietly in carefully measured tones. "Leave -- now."

Hermione decided she didn't want to deal with him when he was that angry, and so went to her room, closing the door softly where she listened carefully at the door, wondering what to do. She had to find out what happened, and so she decided to leave and go ask Headmaster Dumbledore. At least if she had some facts to understand what was going on, she might know why he was so angry. She left her room and headed for the Headmaster's office to get some answers.

*****

It was well past midnight and Severus lay in bed, reading the book Hermione had left on her nightstand table. He'd picked it up several hours earlier out of a desire to read something different, not associated with the rules of Hogwarts or memories he had within. Thus far, he was finding it an uncomfortable reminder of his predicament rather than an escape, yet he kept reading.

Hermione still hadn't come to bed, and he was starting to wonder if she'd decided to sleep on the couch in her room. When he'd seen her earlier, he only wanted her out of his sight. The last thing he needed was a reminder of the cause of all his current troubles. Now, he mused, his life was similar to the poor protagonist in Hermione's book. Just when he thought all was well, his life turned upside-down. But, his anger had cooled somewhat, replaced with a dull realisation that things had been too good. Of course, the Dark Lord was dead and gone; issues with his young wife seemed to be on their way to resolution; he'd come up with a plan to deal with Draco Malfoy...no, it was too much. He wondered what deity he might have angered to have such a cursed life.

"Severus?"

He snapped his head around to see Hermione standing in the doorway of the bathroom, still wearing her school robes.

"Hermione."

"Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Don't ask ridiculous questions," he snapped. Hermione nodded and turned to leave. "Wait," he called. She turned back to look at him. "You're quite overdressed to come in here." She smiled at him, then quickly removed her robes and walked into the bedroom. The candlelight gave her body a golden sheen, casting shadows that emphasised the curve of her breasts, the gentle curves of her stomach, the shadow of her navel.

"So...you want to talk about it?" she asked, moving to stand at his side of the bed, thoroughly unabashed in her nudity. Yet, Severus thought, there still seemed to be a purity about her that he hadn't seen in women he'd had before, in the way she stood before him so comfortably...neither hiding herself nor attempting to display herself in a vulgar way.

"No. But, if you'd like to help me, I suggest you put that mouth of yours to better tasks than talking," he said firmly. At the moment, he wanted to take his mind off of it all. Hermione's lips around his cock would be a good start toward that goal. She smiled at him, then lifted the covers near his knees and slipped between the sheets. Severus placed the book on his nightstand table as she settled between his thighs, and he threw back the covers to watch her. He gathered her bushy hair in his hand as she licked teasingly at the tip of his cock, then he sighed with pleasure as she took his entire length, expertly applying the lessons he'd given her on relaxing her throat.

Perhaps he did have some things to take comfort in after all.

"Better now?" Hermione asked, after she'd swallowed the results of her incredible attentions.

"It's a good start," he answered, leaning forward to give her a kiss. "A pleasing job, Hermione," he whispered in her ear.

"Pleasing enough to earn a reward?" she whispered back.

"Yes, I believe so," he answered, chuckling. He guided her to lay down, then moved over her, losing himself in enjoying her body, laving her nipples with his tongue, the softness of her skin...and then downward, using his fingers and tongue to give her a fitting reward.

Afterwards, as he tucked her to his body and pulled the covers up over them, he told her: "Saturday will be your punishment."

"Yes, sir," she murmured sleepily back.

"It will hurt," he warned.

"Yes, I know."

He smiled and then, just because he could, bit her at the junction between her neck and shoulder. He felt her stiffen then relax after a few seconds. Her head and shoulder moved slightly to give him better access as he bit down on her. She made a slight whimpering noise in her throat before he released her and settled down to sleep.