Attempts at Reconciliation

Chapter 3 – Attempts at Reconciliation

It was two days later that Harry managed to corner Ginny in her Charms classroom, having almost literally bent over backwards in order to time it so that she wouldn't have anything else to do and, consequently, would have time to talk to him whether she chose to admit it or not. He knocked quietly at her half-open classroom door; her head lifted at the sound.

"Yes?"

"Ginny? It's Harry. Can I speak to you?"

Ginny stiffened upon hearing his voice. If she'd had any idea that Harry would be visiting, she would have placed a Locking Charm on the door. As it was, she was stuck.

"Come on in. I have some time between classes. What's on your mind?"

"The last ten years."

"What about them?"

"Specifically, what happened six months after I supposedly died."

"You married Hermione."

"Besides that."

"What is there besides that?" she asked suspiciously, her eyes narrowing. "Just what are you getting at, Harry?"

"I understand that you were pregnant ... with my child," he blurted out before he could stop himself.

"Who told you that?" she demanded. Before Harry could answer, she spoke again. "Draco. Damn him! I swear, I'm going to hex my boneheaded ex-husband right into the middle of next year! He promised me he wouldn't tell you!"

"Then it's true? You were pregnant?"

"I was," Ginny reluctantly admitted. "But what could it possibly matter to you? And even if you had known, it probably wouldn't have made an ounce of difference. You had more important things to worry about, after all...such as running off to America with Hermione. You weren't about to concern yourself with mundane things like fatherhood. And even if I'd been inclined to tell you, you weren't around to tell! I imagine he even showed you a picture of her?"

"Yes," Harry revealed. "She looks just like me. He also made a point of mentioning that he'd given her his name, seeming to think it a perfect way to get back at me, to throw it in my face that my daughter called him 'Father' instead of me. Of course, it shouldn't surprise me. It's just what Draco would do in order to try and get a rise out of me." Harry came up to her desk, placed his hands on it, then leaned down so that their faces were only inches apart. "You had intended to tell me you were pregnant if I'd come back, hadn't you?"

"Yes," Ginny reluctantly replied, her heart pounding wildly in spite of herself at Harry's nearness. Damn him! Why did he have to still look so good, still have such a gorgeous physique, beautiful green eyes, and a smile that could melt chocolate at twenty paces, not to mention the sexiest beard and mustache she'd ever seen?

"Of course, being what he is, I don't imagine that Draco would ever allow me to have a relationship with her, if only as a ... friend of her parents."

"Probably not," Ginny admitted. "Not unless I told him otherwise."

Harry's eyes widened. "Since when do you have that much influence over him?"

"Since I bore him twin boys," she stated matter-of-factly. "Of course, considering what you and Hermione have done to me, why should I do you any favours? How do I know you won't try to take her away from me the first chance you get?"

"Because I already have two girls. They're enough of a handful without adding another one."

"Yes, I imagine 'Mione would have something to say about that."

"Not very much, actually. The most she ever did for the girls was give birth to them. I've done the majority of child care. She wouldn't even breast-feed them. I had to feed them with bottles, and let me tell you, that was some trick, trying to feed two hungry, screaming babies with a wife away at work! It was lucky that I had enough money from Mum and Dad to live on without working because I had to devote myself totally to the care of the girls. 'Mione didn't take a real interest in them until they were around two."

The contempt in his voice prompted Ginny to remark, "I take it you didn't like that."

"When she puts work before family life, no, I don't. Besides, shortly before we returned, she was doing ... more than work, actually. More accurately, she was having an affair."

Ginny's eyes widened with a mixture of astonishment and disbelief. "Having an affair? That doesn't sound like the Hermione I know."

"I assure you, it's true. I have no reason to lie to you."

Oh, don't you? Ginny couldn't help thinking. It's a great way to get me to feel sorry for you, then you worm your way into my good graces...and my bed...again. Well, I see through your scheme, Mister. It won't work!

"Our marriage has been going downhill for the last six months. The main reason I decided to come back was to make her break off her affair."

"Of course, that isn't necessarily going to stop her from having an affair with somebody here if she so chooses," Ginny pointed out.

"I know. But the least she can do is wait until we're divorced before doing it and even then, doing it discreetly so the girls aren't traumatised by it."

Ginny could scarcely believe her ears. "You're ... contemplating divorce?"

"Yes. But I can't seem to pin her down long enough so we can discuss terms. Sometimes I'm tempted to just go ahead and file and let the chips fall where they may. Maybe that would get her attention."

"But that might not be good for your girls," Ginny returned.

"No, it wouldn't, but better that than living in a broken home."

"Strange how something supposedly so 'eternal' only lasted ten years. Could it actually be that you threw everything you ever loved away for the wrong reasons, married for the wrong reasons?"

"Quite possible," he reluctantly admitted. "But you know me ... always slow on the uptake."

"Yes, but this time it not only affected you, but me, Ron, our family and the entire wizarding world! And are you now trying to tell me that you're sorry you did it?"

"Would you believe me if I said I was?" Harry's voice was almost a purr, reminiscent of the time he had sweet-talked her just before they had fallen into bed and shagged like rabbits; that night had engendered her precious Lily-flower, who looked so like her father it was painful just to look at her sometimes. But even as much as she wanted him, Ginny wasn't about to allow that to happen. Not before she gave Harry a taste of what it had been like for her without him all these years ... and for Ron, knowing the girl he loved most belonged to someone else, and not just any someone else, but his best friend. Or at least someone who had been his best friend.

"Let's say I'd be more inclined to believe it if you'd been up-front about it from the beginning."

"I'm afraid my ... hormones just got the better of me."

"Even though you knew what was waiting for you at home? No. It had to be more than that," Ginny almost scoffed. "You don't generally take such drastic steps unless there's more than hormones at work ... or unless you believe there's more than hormones at work."

"No, I'm afraid it was simply hormones at work. Very strong hormones, I admit, but hormones nonetheless."

"A bout with hormones that lasted ten years. That has to be a record," Ginny mused. She noticed that Harry had moved in closer. A few steps more and he would be able to reach out and touch her, and Ginny wasn't about to go for that. "Oh, no, you don't, Harry! Don't come near me. Don't touch me. Not unless you want me to hex you into next year! You no longer have the right. You willingly threw it away, remember ... and for what? If you expect me to associate with you on anything more than a professional basis, it's going to be on my terms. You don't call the shots anymore. I will be in charge. Me, Ginny Weasley! If you can't handle that, I suggest you leave now."

"We were trying to make it easier on you!" he protested.

"By leading me on, making me believe you wanted to marry me, while all the time you and Hermione planned to run off together after starting a rumour that you'd been killed? By lying, two-timing, and making a fool out of not only me but my entire family, literally throwing away everything we'd ever given you? How is that supposed to make it easier?" Ginny's eyes began to shoot sparks, her anger beginning to rise.

"You make it sound worse than it is."

"Oh, really. I suppose you even think it's something that every young witch and wizard should aspire to!"

"I never said that."

"Oh, of course not," Ginny threw back. "But then, you don't have to because your actions positively scream it! Which reminds me ... I assume Draco also told you that we divorced last year. It was fine for a while, then I found out he was seeing someone else. He said he loved her and didn't believe I'd ever truly loved him, no matter what I claimed. So I let him go. It was the kindest thing to do, and he's back with Pansy now. So much for your matchmaking. He loves our boys, though, so I allow him visitation rights. And we're friends, but that's it. I've even dropped his name and gone back to 'Weasley,' although the boys will keep his name."

Harry nodded, freezing in place for the moment.

"He told me as much. And not only that. He also told me that you married him on the rebound because Lily was coming and that you never truly loved him. He said that he'd caught you many times going through pictures of us, including a couple that I'd autographed to you, one of which showed us snogging and another which showed me smiling at you. In essence, he said that you'd never stopped loving me."

"Since when do you believe in 'the gospel according to Draco Malfoy'? You know he's almost congenitally incapable of telling the truth!" she retorted, trying to bluff her way out.

"He wasn't lying," Harry returned quietly but firmly. "I knew it the moment he mentioned those pictures. I remember when I autographed them for you. It was a time when I was so much in love with you that it hurt, and I just couldn't keep quiet about it."

Ginny gave him a hard look. "Are you trying to claim that you still feel that way about me?"

"No ... at least not at this point." Although that statement is true, Harry finished in his mind.

"Good thing, because I wouldn't believe you, not after ten years of emotional hell. And problems I would not have had if you two had only done the decent thing and come clean. Problems that you caused, Harry! For that matter, I don't know why I'm even speaking to you. And I managed to move on with my life after you left, once I managed to stop crying every night. But I hardly stopped for months. And Ron hardly stopped drinking for months and did his share of crying as well.

"He could have taken out stock in Ogden's, he drank so much of it. It's a wonder we ever managed to dry him out! And now you two have the gall to come crawling back just because your marriage didn't turn out to be all moonlight and roses like you expected and expect us to just drop everything we've been doing for the past decade. To forget the hell you've put us all through and simply take you back into our lives, hearts, and beds as though it never happened!

"And I don't think I need to remind you that although Ron does still love Hermione, after what you two have done, he's not likely to want much to do with either of you, not for a long time to come, especially now that he knows the whole story. I also suggest you not try to meet with him because he's just as likely to hex you into next year as I am. Be proud of yourself because you've basically destroyed your friendship with him by stealing the girl he loved right from under his nose. All he's likely to feel toward either of you right now is bitterness and vengeance."

In the back of Harry's mind that rang a bell; he would have to get home soon in order to intercept Luna's letter. For the moment, though, he had a few more things to say, but Ginny spoke again before he could draw breath for a reply.

"I also suppose the relationship we had meant nothing to you once you got the one you really wanted. I suppose you'd wanted her all along and just amused yourself with me until you could manage to get Ron and me out of the way."

"That's not true," Harry insisted. "I cared deeply for you, you have to know that. You made me happier than I've ever been in my life, allowed me to experience what it was like to truly be loved for myself. How can you possibly expect me...or anyone else...to forget something like that? I can't and I won't."

"All the same, my love wasn't good enough to bring you home to me. How do you think that makes me feel, knowing that the man I loved was such a bloody effing coward? That he'd sooner lie about being dead than face me with the truth?"

"I'm sorry, Gin. Truly I am. I never meant to hurt anyone, least of all you, and never meant to make you feel used. It's just that..."

"Your hormones got the better of you." Ginny held up a hand, biting her lip to keep the tears in her eyes from overflowing. "You know, that's what hurts most of all. You left me, the girl you claimed to love and wanted to marry, threw our whole future away for someone you didn't really love, someone that you simply wanted to shag! No, spare me any further apologies. I hurt enough without them. Now, if you don't mind, I've got a class in fifteen minutes."

"You don't intend to make it easy for me, do you?"

"I'm making it far easier than you deserve. I just simply decided to give you a little taste of your own medicine and see how you like it. Muck things up this time, and you'll bloody well wish you were really dead by the time I get through with you! No one makes a fool of Ginevra Weasley and gets away with it, not even the great Harry Potter! Now, as I said earlier, get out of my classroom. I'm expecting my sixth-year students."

Harry moved to stand in the doorway, eyes shooting green daggers at her, although Ginny hardly seemed to feel them. "You haven't heard the last of this, Ginny. I don't give up easily!"

"Neither do I. I suggest you keep that in mind. Now get out! I bloody well don't want to lay eyes on you again until dinner, if then."

Harry continued staring at her but didn't say anything; he simply ducked out the door and was gone.

It was fortunate that Ginny actually had half an hour before her class began rather than the fifteen minutes she'd told Harry. After he left, she dashed into her study, locked her door, and threw herself onto the nearest couch, sobbing in anger and pain. "I hate you, Harry bloody Potter! You lying, two-faced bastard! I hate you for thinking all you needed to do was sweet-talk me and I would fall right back into bed with you! Why did you ever come back? Why? I hate you! I hate you! "

But what she hated most of all was the fact that he could still affect her like this, still make her want him almost unbearably, even after ten years. Despite all Harry had put her through, however, Ginny knew that she would go through it all yet again if it meant having him at the end of it. And if this last hour was any indication, the rest of her day wasn't going to get much better.

* * * * *

Later that day, Ginny went back to her Hogwarts flat for some rest. She had just showered and donned her dressing gown when she heard the knock on her door. Upon opening it, she was strongly tempted to slam it shut again, for a ten-years-older Hermione Granger-Potter stood on her doorstep. Ginny's blood almost literally boiled, she was so angry. How dare Hermione come here and rub her nose in it, show her face after the way she and Harry had lied, cheated, and made a fool of everyone who ever loved them?

"I have nothing to say to you, Hermione. You might as well just turn around and leave."

"Not until you listen to me."

"What makes you think I give a damn about anything you have to say after what you and Harry did to me? You might as well have cut my heart out!"

"Harry warned me you might react this way. I can't blame you, but that was years ago, Ginny. You were my friend once. How can you simply throw that away?"

"I didn't. You did." Ginny's eyes were like blocks of brown ice. "You knew how I felt about Harry, not to mention how Ron felt about you, and you still did it. I should hex you into the next century instead of saying another word to you!"

"Ginny, please believe me. Believe us. We never meant to hurt you, any of you!"

"You should have thought of that before you ran off with the man I loved and spread the rumour that you were dead in order to cover your tracks!" Ginny smiled bitterly. "Quite a neat trick, actually. The perfect way to get rid of the three albatrosses around your necks ... me, Ron, and Draco ... all in one fell swoop. Everyone that might conceivably cramp your style or get in the way of your shagging each other like rabbits. Well, I certainly hope you've enjoyed yourselves! And incidentally, I divorced Draco last year."

"It wasn't like that, Ginny. I loved Harry, too, or at least I thought I did at the time. Surely you can understand that. We truly thought that what we were doing was best for all concerned."

Ginny was all ready with a bitter retort when something Hermione had said earlier finally registered. "You ... only thought you loved him?"

Hermione reluctantly nodded.

"That's even worse than doing it because you really did love him. You were basically just using him then, and I know Harry well enough to know that he hates being used or manipulated, being anybody's pawn or puppet! And he's got to realise it by now. Whatever else he is, Harry's not stupid, even though he acts that way sometimes. So you're telling me that your marriage is essentially over?"

"Yes. In fact, I...I had an affair not too long ago. I tried to cover it up, claim it was all extra work, but Harry saw through it. That was the main reason we decided to pull up stakes and come back here. But things have been deteriorating between us for the last six months. For that matter, I fully expect him to ask me for a divorce at some point in the not-too-distant future, and considering the way I've treated him, not to mention our girls, lately, I wouldn't blame him if he did ... and asked for custody of the girls. But I'm so ashamed of what I did...the affair, I mean...that I can't bring myself to face him. I just avoid him at every opportunity, and when I can't, I leave just as soon as I can after that, making sure he doesn't get a chance to speak to me at any length. What's more, I'm sure both he and the girls have noticed."

"You can't keep running forever. It isn't fair to either of you. And it seems totally out of character for you to be so afraid now. Next to Harry, you've always been the bravest person I know. Think about it. I can't say it'll be easy to forgive either of you, but if you have gumption enough to face down Draco at his worst, I feel sure you can face Harry. I know he can be intimidating sometimes ... that bloody temper of his! I swear, he's got to get it from his mum, or at least Sirius always said he did. But neither of you can move on unless you get your present lives ironed out, and for that, you've got to talk with him and take your chances, decide just what you intend to do regarding your marriage and children. Don't wait. Talk to him. Soon. Then let me know what you decide."

Then the two women did something that Ginny could never have imagined them doing, especially not after she'd learned the truth about Hermione and Harry ... they embraced, and what's more, embraced like the friends they once had been, and with luck, would be again.