In which the reviewer is rapidly deteriorating into a state of fangirlish delight.... *squee*!!!

*beams*

Oh, this is marvellous! I love the "random stories" feature thingy here on TPP... I'd never have found this otherwise!

  Thank you.

Teehee, I enjoyed this! Dudley is perfectly captured in here. :-)

this was so sweet! and i LOLed at the bit about bellatrix. the lines on gardening were great, too

" Keep your old gum wrappers."  The best way I can describe the feeling I got when I read that was "That sentence was meant to be there".  It was beautiful.

God. That so sounds lik her. You my dear are scary. Are you sure you're not Rita Skeeter? :) good chapter. Very well done.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH I want my Sirius! O want him back NOW. *sniff*

LOL! Voldemort said bold is beautiful! LOL!

LOL! I remember that when it came out . . . well the song version of it. Who DIDN'T listen to the song version about a billion times? Ahh, that makes ME nostalgic.And yes, I am THAT Acacia.Work on your Marauders MST!

Oh man. I couldn't stop giggling maniacally through that entire speech. It has been years since I read that column, and your spin was drop-down-fall-over-get-back-up-funny. Well done! 

LOL! The title alone got me laughing!

"you'll appreciate them when you have to catch a crocodile to make a new handbag"  <---- CLASSIC!!!

Will there be another?  Draco Malfoy's advice to escaping death from Voldy? *snort* Good job! 

ROTFL!

*applause!*

That's FANTASTIC! I love that speech.

GOOD!!!! hahahahha...

Hahaha, I loved this. And, it seems I've read these 'speeches' at just the right time, my sister is graduating high school today. How appropriate, right? Anyway, the ceremony is in four hours, and I'd like to share these with her before hand, she'll think they're hilarious (because they are...friggin' hilarious, that is). This must be some sign or something, perhaps I should convince Katherine to read Potter, it might prove useful during her college years. Must spend some more time dwelling on that. Anyway, gotta get ready for her big day, thanks for the great (and did I mention hilarious?) renditions of everyone's favorite "Wear Sunscreen" speech, I'll be sure to help Katherine perfect her Patronus, might come in handy.Peace,Sue :o)

Dumbledore doing a double entendre with "wand", hmm, not sure I'm buying it LOL!

"Keep your old comic books. Throw away your old homework." yes!!

Oh, Percy, you arrogant, parent-despising, career-advancing you-know-what.  Huh.  Maybe Percy is the next "You-Know-What".  ROFLMAO. 

Great job.  I love this 'Advice' series. 

What a lovely collection! My favorite was Dumbledore's, particularly the passage regarding the fangirl interpretation of his relationship with McGonagall. It made me laugh. :-) Is this finished now, or will there be further installations? Personally, I'd like to hear from Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, and Fred & George. I'm going to bookmark this so I'll be sure to notice if there's more! Thanks for writing it.

Live with Giants?  Er....no thanks, Hagrid. :)

Perfect Voldemort speech. *Looks round for sexy, baldheaded men.**