Bouncing Baby Snape by themistresssnape

Bouncing Baby Snape by themistresssnape

Thanks: My loving husband for being my beta and beaweasley2 for coming up with this zany idea!

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“Last one, Carlie,” Emma said with a grin. After my last dare, I was sure Snape would kill me this time. My last game card glowed yellow, my final task illuminated. I sighed with relief.

“Oh, this one won’t be half bad at all!” I squealed. I arched one eyebrow and passed the card around the group. “Who knows, maybe he’ll take me up on the offer!”

A loud giggle ran around the group, and I’m sure I wasn’t the only one imagining what that would be like. We dispersed for the night, wondering how many more of these pranks Snape could withstand.

Angharad and I sat in the Slytherin common room with a piece of parchment and a quill. Baby Names was written at the top of the page with a column for boys on the left and girls on the right. We sat up long into the night thinking up names for the list. By the time we went up to bed at three o’clock, we were laughing so hard that we were crying.

I wasn’t sure when I was going to spring the list on him. My first dare was perfect for the classroom; the second could only be done in the Great Hall. Beatrice suggested interrupting class again, but I wasn’t going to press my luck there again. Ambushing him in the hallway was my best option.

Professor Snape usually hung back in the entrance hall before lunch, making sure there weren’t any stragglers sneaking off. I figured I could give him the list then, where there’d be enough witnesses to fulfill the dare but not so many that he’d be really embarrassed. My friends and I had already put him through so much.

I kept the list of baby names in my bag and my game card in my pocket. The dare itself wasn’t so bad, but the consequence for failure was motive enough to want to succeed. I wasn’t waddling around school for a month with a baby bump and a t-shirt that said Severus Snape was here.

The insanity must have finally taken hold, because the day seemed to drag by. I couldn’t wait until lunch, but it seemed like time was moving extra slowly.

Phyllis, Marianne, Fern, and I raced down the stairs from the fourth floor. My list was crumpled in my hand, soft with sweat, as we reached the entrance hall. Professor Snape was leaning against the wall by the points glasses, his dark eyes sweeping the hall. I felt like his gaze was purposefully jumping over us, and that set the adrenaline pulsing. I don’t know why, but it did. It made my face burn with a blush and my breath quicken.

Was it the game or Snape himself that set my heart pumping so feverishly?

I threw a smile over my shoulder and walked across the entrance hall as gracefully as I could. His eyes were still avoiding me, but I could see his breathing pick up and a muscle in his jaw begin to tick.

I was finally standing in front of him, aware for the first time of how tall he was. Anxiety rolled off him like heat waves. It made me shiver. “Good afternoon, Professor Snape,” I said happily, flashing him a genuinely friendly smile.

His gaze was focused on something over my left shoulder. “Afternoon, Miss Cohen,” he grumbled, shaking his hair over his face.

I cleared my throat lightly, my fingers worrying against the parchment in my hand. “Do you have a moment, Professor? I need to tell you something.” I made my smile as wide and welcoming as I could.

There was no reply, but his eyes finally settled on my face. He seemed unnerved by my smile, like he knew something was coming. The entry hall was quickly emptying, and I had to get through this.

“I just wanted you to know that you’ve always been my favorite teacher. I admire you because you’re so intelligent. And… well, I have to admit I think you’re really handsome, too. In your own way.”

One of his raven brows quirked up in surprise. He folded his arms across his chest and looked at me with a smile in his eyes. “Really?”

The blush came back with full force. “Yes, really. You’re a wonderful man. A man who I think would make a great husband and an exceptional father.” I waited for him to laugh or hex me, but he just stood there. “My mother was young when she had me, and I am of age. I’d like to think I would make a good mother.”

“Get to the point, Miss Cohen.” His lips were beginning to twitch up in a smile.

I smiled again. “I want to have your children, Professor Snape. I even have a list here of some names,” I said, handing him the rumpled list. “I like Renesmee for a girl and Gabriel for a boy.”

Snape looked over the list with a smirk on his face. He looked up after a while, gazing around the entrance hall. Unfortunately for me, it was deadly empty. The smirk on his face widened as he folded the list and slipped it into the pocket of his robes. “Do you know what you’re saying, Miss Cohen?” he asked, taking a determined step forward.

I looked up into his wide black eyes and felt something flutter in my stomach. His hands latched onto my waist, pulling me forward. I could feel the heat coming off him, smell the sweetness of his breath. My heart began pounding in my chest. “I… uh… I,” I stammered, unable to keep my thoughts straight.

He grinned and released me. “I didn’t think so,” he mumbled. He turned me around with gentle hands on my shoulders. I felt his breath as it ruffled my hair as he leaned down to whisper in my ear. “Come talk to me after you graduate, Miss Cohen.”

Before I knew what had happened, Snape had slapped my arse and then swept gracefully into the Great Hall. My head was spinning and my breath came in quick gasps. My stomach twisted and turned so much that I couldn’t even think about eating lunch. I nearly ran to the bathroom and splashed water on my face.

With shaking hands, I pulled my game card from my pocket.

“Oh no!” I groaned, watching the card change from yellow to red. Beneath the consequence for failure, the words too few witnesses appeared. I felt like I was going to be sick.

The girls had all made it to the Room of Requirement by eight that night. I was sitting against the wall, a cushion held over the bump that appeared during NEWT DADA. I was silently thanking every deity I could remember for the roomy Hogwarts robes.

Bernise began setting up the game board as the room provided snacks. Robin came to sit next to me, taking in my worried expression.

“Oh my God, Carlie,” Sadie said from across the room. The orb over the game board was glowing bright red, matching the text on the card in my hand. “What happened?”

I sped through the story, skipping over a few of the more private details. There were suppressed giggles as I finished, tossing my card toward the board. “Thank Merlin that’s over,” I mumbled.

“Well…” Maragrite said impatiently. “Stand up and let’s have a look.”

Reluctantly—and with difficulty—I stood up, letting my robes fall open. I looked like I was seven months pregnant. My stomach was covered with a sickly pale, baby blue t-shirt with the words Severus Snape was Here written across the chest. A black arrow pointed downward from the words to the bulge that was my belly.

There was a moment of shocked silence before everyone burst out in giggles. I sank back to the floor, wiping the tears from my eyes and waiting for the next card to light up. I leaned over to Robin and whispered, “He did say to come back to see him after graduation.”

Robin’s jaw dropped, and I laughed, mentally calculating how long it was to graduation.

The orb over the game board glowed yellow, and I looked over to see who’s card was glowing. “Good luck, Phyllis.”

And the fun continues…

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Author’s Notes:

My Prompt for this chapter was:

#50) Tell him you want to have his children. Hand him a list of baby names.