New Chapter for Serpent in the Moonlight
Serpent in the Moonlight
Celestial Melody33 Reviews | 7.45/10 (33 Ratings, 0 Likes, 11 Favorites )
Nineteen years after Voldemort’s defeat, a young girl named Riana is living an innocuous life with her adoptive Muggle parents until she receives her acceptance letter from Hogwarts.
Escaping the clutches of her loving but stifling parents, Riana travels to London and from there to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. There, Riana is viewed as mysterious, cunning, sly, and—though her parentage is unknown—is chosen for Slytherin House.
The two halves of her life clash, as her anorexia battles with the disdain of fellow Slytherin students for Muggle-born witches and wizards. Follow Riana on her journey through the world of wizardry and her search to find a true home, the identity of her real parents, as well as her inner conflict with anorexia.
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About Celestial Melody
Author
Celestial Melody
Member Since 2006 | 8 Stories | Favorited by 4 | 67 Reviews Written | 64 Review Responses
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Hello all! I am back... as myself. *grins* In other words, my cynicism is done for now. Still don't love JKR, but her books have given us fanfiction writers a lovely playground and I'm very grateful to her for that.
With that apology (?) out of the way, I am still unsure about "Serpent in the Moonlight" and its "update status." At this point, I am working more with photography than I am with writing (except, of course, for "Black as Snow," which I simply adore), so it's quite touch-and-go. But who knows? I'm fairly certain that "Heavenly Hell," etc. will not be updated. Totally lost interest in that. HOWEVER! "In the Shi of the Setting Sun" should be coming along sometime.
Now, let's see, what have I been doing lately? Well, I'll list it for you guys!
- One of my best friends is engaged! O_O I'm so happy for her. =)
- I'm heading off to University soon and I'm really excited about that.
- Now, just random thoughts: Keeno, Megan, costumes, clean room, history, ballet, Broadway, hats, boys or girls, washing clothes, Autumn, music, soundtracks, photography, models, bed sheets, writing, Netflix, Norah Jones, vibratto, Yoga, Dance Magazine, Hollywood, movies, sweaters, Good Earth tea, Burt's Bees Carrot lotion, face paint, Harlequin, Batman, clipped nails...
You know, I think I want to have a contest! For my readers, and then I can, like, have a prize or something... That would be fun, although I'm not sure how it would work. Any ideas?
Okay, now I'm just rambling. Anyway, that's my life right now. So...
...a great and expansive Thank You to all my wonderful readers and reviewers! You've all been angels and helped me through a very tough time in my life. Bless you.
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Updates
- "Black as Snow" - 5th chapter In The Works
- "The Shi of the Setting Sun" COMING SOON
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Bannermakers
Banner 1 & 3 ~ Eowyn89
Banner 2 ~ Colores
Banners 0 & 4 ~ wendelin the wierd
Banner 5 ~ HorseLover
Banner 6 ~ Morwen
Banners 7 & 8 ~ sayiansirius
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Reviews for Serpent in the Moonlight
Enjoyable chapter! And a little longer than the others, which is good.I really like Fabian, but before you mentioned that he was Scottish I had a hard time figuring out what accent was singnified by his constant 'ya'-ing (if there be such a word!) To be honest, I think 'ya' makes it out to be an Irish accent (I'm Irish, I'm surrounded by it ... Dubliners say 'Howaya?' all the time!)The Scottish would be more likely to pronounce 'you' as either 'ye', or if it's at the end of a sentence or there's an emphasis on the word 'you', then they over-pronounce it, sort of like 'yew'. For your story, I wonder would 'ye' be better?Good god ... another 'Britain/Ireland lecture' from me ... sorry!Looking forward to the next chapter. How long do we have to wait until they get to Hogwarts?
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
No! Don't apologize. I love con. crit! :) And the fact that you're from Ireland really helps because you are exposed to, and know, the various dialects. I love getting your comments; they truly help.
About Fabian's heritage and accent...
Before I reworked his accent, he was Scottish and that was fine ... except he sounded American, hee! So I rewrote it. You know, it's funny that you should mention his Irish-sounding speech because I felt the same way when I reread it the second time.
I discovered that Fabian sounded more like the Irish actors in movies (i.e. Bend It Like Beckham) that I'd seen instead of the 'Oliver Wood' type accent I was going for. Consequently, I changed his nationality to Irish.
My beta got confused with the change, so I decided to make Fabian Scottish again. Honestly, the poor fellow has gone through so many citizenship changes! :PPlus, well, Fabian just sounded more like a Scottish name to me.
Now, though, that you've pointed that out, I might just change him back to being Irish. I don't like the 'ye' and 'yews' that much. (Besides, it's more work! :D)
Thank you very much for all your help. I really, really appreciate it.
Oh, yes -- Hogwarts. Well, hate to tell you, but they still have about ... four more days in Diagon Alley. Eek! But they do something fun each day, so it isn't tedious ... I hope. *crosses fingers* Stick with Riana, though, she will eventually get to "Hoggy Warty" Hogwarts, :).
Besos y brasos!
~Julia~
Response from little beloved (Reviewer)
Even if they have four days left in Diagon Alley, your story is always FAR from tedious! I'm just dying to see her in Hogwarts, and sorted!Oooh! So Fabian was Irish at some stage? Cool! My mother and father in law were over for dinner last night, and I asked them what they thought of the 'ya'/'ye'/yew debate. (Yes, you are now famous in my household!) My mam-in-law is half Scottish, and my dad-in-law is Northern Irish (very Scottish-like accent) and they decided I was wrong about 'ye' and that Fabian would over-pronounce it, and say 'yew' (just as my father-in-law does!)I think that 'yew' wouldn't work in print, and it would be such a pain to have to change it all. I have to say, I like him being Scottish, so I would leave it the way it is, if I were you!God, all that text just to tell you it's perfect the way it is!Anyway ... as always, I am loving Riana's complex character, and looking forward (impatiently!) to more.
Fabian is the perfect character to complement Riana ... and he is probably as unusual as she is, although in completely different ways. I hope we continue to see more of him!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Oh, I'm so glad you think so. :) I have had terrible troubles with him, the little bugger. :P Because he is such a foil to Riana, he's happy, friendly, etc. I had difficulty giving him enough malice to land him in Slytherin House. I thought his being a werecat made him odd, hee! *gasp, giggle*
As my lovely beta, Evie, said: He just couldn't be in Slytherin being the way he was. I really liked his character before I made him a touch more malicious, but I like him now, too. Hee!
You will definitely see more of Fabian as he is going to be the one who lightens all of Riana's foul moods. Thank you for R&R-ing, even though you'd already read the story while you were editing, ;)
~Julia~
Yes, birds are quite messy. I could actually smell the unkempt owls (and their cages) by the way you described it. And to think ... the owls are depicted so regally in JKR's books that we kind of forget how filthy they can actually be. Wonderfully written!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Hee! Yes, they are. I have two cockatiels and the floor around their cage is so messy! Honestly, it should be cleaned five times a day ... but I don't have the time. :)
I'm so glad you "saw" the shop. I wanted to go back and rewrite it after I reread Harry's experience with the Magical Menagerie in the books, but I never did.
I love getting your reviews! They're always so helpful. Thank you, too, for all your kind comments. :)
~Julia~
P.S. I love the little owl.
I am intrigued with the underlying theme of Riana's weight issues. In this chapter, it was more prevalent than earlier chapters. I know I should be patient and wait for more chapters, but I am curious as to what role her weight will play in the future, while at Hogwarts, and if anyone will help her overcome it.
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Yes, I felt that the reader (and me) needed to be reminded that Riana still isn't healthy. Her anorexia simply adds to her problems. I wish I could give her a hug, hee! But, then there would be no story and she'd probably glare at me with her cold eyes anyway. :)
Rest assured, though, that her weight will play some role while she is at Hogwarts. But I am not going to tell you ... yet. :) *grins wickedly*
Thank you very, VERY much for your lovely reviews. I <3 them. *blushes for using Netspeak*
~Julia~
Ooooh! Very interesting! What an intriguing development. I'm glad she chose a cat ... I'm a cat person too. :)But Fabian? How interesting! I'm dying to know more about him. And her grey eyes ... you've got me theorizing now!Most of all, I just have to say that your portrayal of Riana is excellent. The way she berates herself every time she unwittingly displays emotion is very apt, as is her attitude towards her own body. Well done!And finally ... poor you! The flu is nasty. Hope you're feeling better. :)
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
I love getting your reviews! :) Thank you so very much.
I love cats, too... and Fabian is somewhat like a cat I used to have ... long ago. But you will certainly find out more about Fabian in the next (in queue) chapter. Hee!
About the grey eyes ... yes, I thought everyone would begin to come up with a few (or maybe one distinct) theory/ies on her parentage. But ... you'll just have to wait and see, :).
I want to thank you, too, for the"Get Well" wishes you expressed to me; that really meant a lot. I'm taking my time, though, in getting well, because more time at home is more time to write, hehehe. Cheers! :)
~Julia~
more, please?
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Hello! :)
Thank you very much for R&R-ing, it's a great encouragment. More will be posted soon, patience ... patience. Hee! No, really, it will be. Perhaps tomorrow.
~Julia~
Response from togspled (Reviewer)
Yes! Tomorrow! excellent idea! oh please!!!i love this story and want it to go on and on and on and...yeah... sorry, got carried away.please! hee hee hee--im desperate!~Em~
Very well written. Your descriptions of the Ollivander's etc were very vivid. And ... the plot thickens. Expression of sadness eh? Hmmm!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thanks very much! :)
I love getting your reviews. The next chapter should be fun. It's in queue, though. :-S
I'm just about to read the next chapter of your story, *bounces up and down as enthusiastically as one can when they have the flu*
~Julia~
wow, you did a great job of portraying a rebellious tween type. i'm intrested to read more!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you very much! I'm glad you enjoyed it, it really encourages me. Sorry for the odd Smiley; I just love them; they're so fun! But, anyhow, yes...whenever chapter 2 gets validated, please continue to read.
Thanks so much...again!
~Julia~