Unrest
Chapter 19 of 20
Celestial MelodyNineteen years after Voldemort’s defeat, a young girl named Riana is living an innocuous life with her adoptive Muggle parents until she receives her acceptance letter from Hogwarts.
Escaping the clutches of her loving but stifling parents, Riana travels to London and from there to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. There, Riana is viewed as mysterious, cunning, sly, and—though her parentage is unknown—is chosen for Slytherin House.
The two halves of her life clash, as her anorexia battles with the disdain of fellow Slytherin students for Muggle-born witches and wizards. Follow Riana on her journey through the world of wizardry and her search to find a true home, the identity of her real parents, as well as her inner conflict with anorexia.
ReviewedAuthor's Notes
First item of muy importante business: the continuance of my thanks to my lovely, wonderful, fantastic, awesome beta... *drum roll* Evie! I couldn't do this without you, chica. And, while I'm at it, thanks to Jan, my moderator, and to Theresa of TPP, and to all the other administrators of both TPP and MNFF. Love!
Second, to all my wonderful readers: I'm so sorry that it has taken me so long to post an update to "Serpent." I've been so busy and I had a monumental writer's block that is now gone, gone, gone! =)
Before you read, I'd like to make a few notes about the new-and-improved "Serpent." I have gone through the entire story and edited each chapter in order to include/exclude information that has now become available due to the release of Deathly Hallows. Perhaps the most notable of these edits is the complete removal of the chapter "Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes," a much-too-long discourse on something that is no longer possible. So, you will not find that in the mix. I have also made slight changes to the storyline, but these will not become evident at all because they are for future chapters.
I just wanted to say Thank You to everyone who's been so supportive of this story and I hope to bring you more Riana in the future.
~Julia~
P.S. In the next chapter, Riana finally gets to Hogwarts. Hooray!
UnrestAs it turned out, however, Riana didn't get a chance to visit the hag in the apothecary again before leaving for Hogwarts. She and Fabian did go by Slug and Jigger's on their way to do a little last-minute sightseeing in Diagon Alley, but the shop was closed. Riana felt a small twinge of disappointment as she passed the hooded windows of the grimy shop, but she disguised her feelings from Fabian. There were some things that he could know (and did know) about her and others that he just wouldn't understand. Her obsession with trying to find out who her parents were was one of them.
But after spending the afternoon with Fabian in Diagon Alley, Riana had mostly forgotten about the ancient witch. She was having too much fun! For instance, on the day before they were to leave from school, Fabian decided he'd introduce Riana to the wonders of wizarding sweets.
"Hey, Riana, I know ya don't really like ice cream, but ya have to try Dean's Ice Cream Parlor," Fabian said with a twinkle in his weird yellow eyes.
Riana narrowed her own thin eyes, but she had been eying the ice cream parlor for days. It was so colorful and she really wanted to know what an Every Flavor Bean was. "What's so great about it, Fabian? I mean, no, I don't like ice cream"...she nearly bit her tongue remembering the taste of the double chocolate fudge ice cream she'd had on her birthday last year..."but maybe I'll try just one scoop."
Fabian grinned, a mischievous glint in his eye. "I, uh, think ya'd better try it for ya self"...and at the suspicion in Riana's eye, he hastened to add..."before I spoil the ... surprise."
That was all it took and the two children were dashing off arm-in-arm to the Ice Cream Parlor. The moment Riana stepped inside the small, one-roomed building, she was in heaven, literally. The interior of the shop was designed to look like one was among the clouds, except that the clouds were pink and green, purple and orange, blue and red, all the colors of the rainbow. The walls were enchanted to look as though there weren't any walls, just acres of never ending, fantastic clouds. And the best part was that when you walked into a wall, you kept on going and going and going, just walking in the midst of cool, misty clouds. But no matter how far you walked, when you wanted to come back, it took little to no time at all.
The shop was scattered with plush white easy chairs that looked like fat marshmallows and that, miraculously, showed no sign of staining or use. There were no tables set up, but as Riana watched, a young couple with ice cream sundaes walked over to two marshmallow chairs, sat down and a round grey marble tray whizzed from a hole high in the wall behind the ice cream counter through the air to hover before them, effectively creating a table in midair.
"Oh, my..." Riana breathed in wonderment. She turned to look at Fabian, grey eyes wide, and found that he was just as saucer-eyed. "Have you ever seen ... something so...?"
"No," he replied, his rough brogue awed. "The last time I was here, the whole place was under construction and Mr. and Mrs. Thomas were here castin' enchantments. They had one, two, three flavors at most, but it was enough." Fabian grinned in admiration. "Looks fantastic, don't it?"
"Yeah. Yeah..."
Riana and Fabian moved toward the glass counter behind which sat a tall girl with mocha skin reading the cover of a magazine. She had long hands covered in henna tattoos and long, straight coal black hair which was strung with ... radishes? Riana and Fabian turned to each other, raised their eyebrows and shrugged.
Whatever, Riana thought as she nudged Fabian forward, a tiny smirk on her face. I'm through trying to figure these people out. But no matter what she did to prepare herself, Riana would find the world of magic infinitely more exciting, more confusing, more amazing than she had ever imagined. But let's leave her with her convictions for the moment; God knows, she has little enough to ground her.
"Excuse me, Miss, can ya help us?"
The girl tilted her head to the side and peered out from around her magazine, which, incidentally, she was reading upside down. "Help? I suppose so. Have you ever met a Potbellied Puffer Fish? I'm told they float ... on the air, but swim in the water, too. Oh, and they don't have those spiny things that normal puffer fish have. Have you seen somebody about your eyes? Is that totally natural or do you have Felinus Cataractus? Is it contagious?" The girl put down her magazine and leaned forward eagerly, her large, pale blue eyes widening.
"Er... No, I haven't. Yes, it's natural, and no, I don't and it's not. Do ya have a menu or somethin'?" Fabian, despite his usual self assurance, seemed to be more than a little disconcerted by the odd girl's questions. As for Riana, she had retreated completely behind Fabian and was looking over his shoulder in stark amazement.
"Pity. I like your eyes. It would be cool if I could catch them too," the girl said, sighing deeply. "Oh, well." With that, she proceeded to pick up her magazine and, opening it, settled in for a good, long read.
Fabian and Riana were flabbergasted and simply stared at each other. The girl had completely forgotten about them, and the couple across the shop...the only other people in the room...were snogging each other silly, their sundaes forgotten on the beneficent hovering tray.
"This is ridiculous, Fabian. She's totally mad. Come on, let's go," Riana whispered in disgust. She had had enough of this crazy girl with radishes threaded into her hair; she had had enough of this wacky shop.
"Aw, come on, Riana," Fabian whispered back, his eyes still on the girl behind the counter. "Just give me a minute more, yeah?"
"Okay, but if you can get her attention again, Felinus, I'll give you a Knut," Riana replied skeptically.
Fabian chuckled. "It's a deal then; I'll be expectin' it, lass." With that, he shook himself and, with a wink at Riana, morphed into a cat. With a meow, he leapt onto the counter and, raising one powerful, tufted paw, batted the girl's magazine (which was, as far as Riana could see, called The Quibbler) away. Grinning his maniacal cat grin, he sat back and, with another shake of his ragged coat, morphed back into a human, his nose centimeters away from the girl's. The strange girl sat quite still, her flaring nostrils the only indication that she was actually breathing.
"All right now, Miss. I've no idea why it's so damn hard for ya to give us the menu, but I'm askin' sweet right now. Two menus, please, if ya will be so very kind." Fabian grinned broadly, his fanged teeth sharp in his mouth.
The girl, whose name according to the swirling color tag on her chest was Evertrue, smiled and reached behind her to grab two menus. "So, a werecat, then?" she asked, the tone of her voice quite normal.
"Right as ever, me darlin'," Fabian purred, a roguish look spreading over his face. He hopped off the counter and handed a pleased Riana her menu.
"Cool." With that, Evertrue slipped off her stool and picked up the magazine off the floor, but she never got back up to the stool. Instead, she got sidetracked by some wonderful article in The Quibbler and froze in a crouched position, her head bent over the magazine, radishes swinging forward, her lips moving silently as she read.
*
A few minutes later, Riana (minus one Knut) and Fabian sat in two of the marshmallow chairs, which were, undeniably, the most comfortable chairs Riana had ever sat in. Grinning at each other over their own floating marble tray, Riana and Fabian picked up their silver spoons and dug into their bowls of ice cream. Riana had decided to try the warm yellow Bertie Bott's ice cream, hoping that it was butterscotch or something similar. She had pressed Fabian for an explanation when she found that the menu listed the colors of the ice creams and not the flavors.
"But what are they?" she had demanded as Fabian buried his nose into his menu, sniggering.
Finally, when she could elicit no response, Riana simply chose a color that might taste good. She still remembered the wonderful warmth of the butterbeer, and if this was half as good, she'd be surprised. Delighted, of course, but she really didn't expect to find anything as good as butterbeer. Too bad that it would make her fat, she had thought, sighing. Meanwhile, Fabian had finally decided on a ruby red ice cream.
"Maybe it'll be raw meat-flavored, eh?" he had said, grinning as his tongue darted out to lick his lips. Riana had nearly gagged until she realized he was joking. At least, she hoped he was joking. With Fabian, she never knew.
In a few moments, Evertrue had brought out their ice cream and melted away with a distracted, "Enjoy," leaving Fabian and Riana to their heaping (so much for "one scoop") bowls of ice cream.
With a pang, Riana plunged her spoon into the goldenrod-colored ice cream. She'd eat a little, just a little. It couldn't hurt that much, could it? With trembling fingertips, Riana raised the silver spoon to her mouth and...
"Bloody hell! Ugh, what is this?" In disgust, Riana spat the mouthful of ice cream back into her bowl, but not before Fabian had swiped his spoon into the golden mound of cream. His eyes dancing, face wiped of expression, Fabian placed the spoonful of ice cream in his mouth and swished it around with his tongue.
His face underwent the most awesome variety of expressions Riana had ever seen. First it was speculative, then beatific, then exquisitely happy, then utterly confused as he opened his eyes to find Riana staring at him in amazement. "Chicken fat," he said.
Riana's mouth hung open and her flinty grey eyes widened to the size of chicken eggs. "I'm gonna be sick," she hissed, ducking her head as a familiar roiling feeling began to bubble up in her stomach, her throat. With a quiet groan, her hands clasped her stomach and clutched convulsively.
"Ah, no, no, don't do that," Fabian said quickly. He set the spoon down and reached forward, palms smooth and sure, to hold Riana's head still. "Look at me, lass," he said, forcing her head up. "Ya better not be doin' that in here. It'll make ya embarrassed. Breathe now, Riana. In, out, in, out..."
Riana breathed as Fabian told her to, her grey eyes locked onto his bright yellow ones. "I n-ever, ever, ever want to try th-at again. I mean, g-od!" she shuddered, her breath going in and out in hyperventilating gasps.
Fabian, whose gaze was trailing back to the bowl of yellow ice cream nodded absently and he licked his lips again. "Okay, but... do ya mind if I have it?"
"No, no, and no and no. Eat it. Eat it all, but, ugh! How can you?" Her breathing finally getting back to normal, Riana jerked her head back, leaving Fabian's taloned hands in midair.
"I'm a cat, I guess." Fabian's grin was back and laughter bubbled up in his eyes. "Would ya care to try mine, then?" Mischievously, he pushed his melting bowl of ruby red ice cream toward Riana, who closed her eyes and swallowed.
I have to, she thought, or I'll hate myself even more. I'm not a coward. I will never, ever be a coward. Steeling herself, she opened her eyes, picked up her spoon, carefully wiped it on her napkin to remove any residue of "golden yellow/chicken fat" and smiled icily back, her lips a thin line. "Sure, why not?"
*
On the morning of September first, Riana woke with the sun. Streaming rays filtered through the streaked window in her now familiar room, suspending dust particles in the hazy air. With a yawn, Riana raised herself on sharply-pointed elbows and stared blearily around the room, frowning slightly as she heard a soft purring noise.
Yawning again, Riana felt something beside her move, something radiating heat, something pressed against her thin side, nestled between the cavities formed by her ribs. Riana's first instinct was one of surprise and then of astonishment. Someone was touching her. Someone was close to her. But, as she started and sat up abruptly in the ancient, creaking bed, the small form twitched, emitted a minuscule mew and snuggled closer into the warmth of Riana's slight body. Riana's thin proud mouth tilted up in a smile as she reached a hesitant hand down to Alvean and softly petted the kitten's grey head.
The kitten's only response was to snuggle closer to her young mistress and give a tiny rumbling burp. A feeling of vague happiness and lazy luxury settled over Riana as the kitten's body heat traveled up her cold fingers, igniting a warmth in them that was completely foreign but certainly not unwelcome.
Sighing deeply, Riana relaxed back onto the pillows and shut her eyes against the sun. It wouldn't hurt to take a cat nap, would it? Ha! Cat nap, that was funny... Maybe Fabian would think so, too. Maybe she should tell him...
"Riana!"
Her eyes flew open just as the door to her room shot inward. Alvean sprang up with a yowl and dug her claws into Riana's stomach before flying under the covers. Riana, in turn, shot out of bed with a cry of pain and, as the blood rushed to her head, feet, everything, sat down on the floor with a bone-crunching plop.
"Up, up, up! We're leavin' today, Riana. The train leaves in ... a very short time. Up, up!" Fabian sprang to Riana's side and, hooking his clawed hands under her armpits, pulled her up like a puppet master and his marionette. "Pack, and then we leave. I'll help."
Riana, her mind sleep-bleared, simply looked at Fabian and, shaking him off, staggered over to her bed, where she sat down and pulled the cowering Alvean out from under the itchy wool blanket and plunked her into her bony lap.
Fabian, however, didn't seem to care, for he darted around the room, throwing black and grey clothing and white knickers into her two suitcases. He flung himself to his stomach and grappled about underneath the armoire for Riana's shoes, which he then crammed into the duffel bag. Finally, when her clothing and shoes had been packed...inexpertly and messily, but even so...he turned to the mounds of school supplies and books that had been purchased in Diagon Alley. He stared down at the huge pile for a moment and then whipped around to face Riana who simply watched him detachedly.
"I'm goin' to me room, which as ya recall is five doors down the hall, and I'm goin' to fetch somethin' for ya, and when I get back, Riana, I expect to see ya dressed in ya school robes, otherwise, ya will be dressin' on the train. Speed it up!"
With that, Fabian zipped out the door, leaving Riana and Alvean to one another. Riana sighed and brought Alvean's fluffy grey body up to eye level, whereupon the kitten batted playfully at her mistress's sharply pointed nose. I don't want to stand out any more than I have to, I guess, and if I show up in Muggle clothes, everybody's going to know that I'm not from a wizarding family, so... "I guess I've got to get dressed."
In three minutes flat, Riana had pulled on a fresh pair of knickers...which, amazingly, was at the top of the pile of clothing Fabian had chunked into one of the suitcases...and a black and grey track suit over which she pulled one of her black school robes. As Riana tugged and pulled at her clothing, trying to cover her ugly body, she heard a thumping noise from the hall. Leaving her reflection (staring at her instead of she at it) in the mirror, Riana turned to see Fabian dragging a leather and oak trunk into the room. He grinned at her and pulled the trunk to the pile of supplies lying in the middle of the floor.
"What do ya think, eh?" he asked, his face merry.
Riana stared, her face expressionless. So, charity was it? God, she should have known better. So, Fabian was sorry for her, too? "Why are you giving me that? Take it back; I don't want it," she hissed, her grey eyes storming up behind their narrowed lids.
Fabian looked at her as if she had lost her mind. "Are you mad?" he exclaimed, the smile dropping from his lips.
"No, I'm not. You're mad if you think that I'm a bloody charity case! Take it back, take it back!" Riana screamed, her voice escalating in pitch as she clutched her arms around her thin body, wrist bones grating against ribs.
Fabian looked at her for a moment, then, with a supremely deep breath, knelt down and, picking up a pile of schoolbooks, placed them in the trunk. In a haze of fury, Riana rushed forward and, reaching deep inside the trunk, yanked out her books.
"I'm not a charity case and I won't take it!" Once she had taken out the books, she spun to face Fabian, her flinty eyes spitting fire. Fabian breathed deeply, his lips moving as he counted to ten. He got to eight, then, with a hiss, his arm shot out, claws retracted and he grabbed Riana's skeletal arm. With his other tanned arm, he slammed shut the lid of the trunk and thrust a shocked Riana down onto the lid.
"Now, listen to me, Riana. This," he indicated the trunk, "is a gift from me to ya. It's not charity...I know ya better than ya think. I'd never, do ya hear me, never, give ya somethin' if I felt sorry for ya. I'm not a kind person, and I've never given anyone anythin' before, so ya better shut up before I lose me temper and punch ya. And this time, ya will lose more than one tooth, do ya hear?"
Riana's mouth hung open as she stared at Fabian. His voice had been even, almost monotone, but there was a great deal of threat beneath the facade of calm. The two stood there, staring at each other for five minutes until...
"I'm sorry," Riana whispered in a small voice. "I thought that you felt sorry for me."
"And I would have had a bonnie reason to do so," Fabian curtly replied.
Riana stiffened, her pride touched, but then Fabian stepped forward, looking first at his hands, opening and closing them, retracting his claws and extending them, and then he looked into her eyes. "But I don't, and I never will, lass, unless ya give me reason to do so." Riana stared at him, her eyes wide. "Oh, and we're goin' to be late for the Express if we don't hurry along."
"Oh! You're right, you're right!" Stooping, Riana scooped an armload of her Diagon Alley purchases into her stick-thin arms and threw them into the trunk, where they fell with a resounding thump, clang, clatter, and tinkle of shifting possessions. Fabian winced as each armload of miscellany fell into the trunk. Finally, when all but little Alvean had been packed, Riana slammed the lid of her trunk shut and stood.
"Done," she announced proudly and flipped her raven black hair over her sharp shoulders.
"Aye and ready to go; lead on, lass," Fabian said, a smile in his voice as he grabbed the duffel bag and piled the suitcases on top of the trunk. Riana made kissing noises to call Alvean to her and, once the suspicious kitten had crept from her warm refuge under the covers, scooped the little grey cat up and held her tight. Then, together, Riana and Fabian walked out the door of Riana's shabby room, leaving the suitcases to the Urquhart's manservant, Henry, a creature that Fabian called a house elf who was standing bowed in the hall.
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Latest 25 Reviews for Serpent in the Moonlight
33 Reviews | 7.45/10 Average
It was all incredibly well-written. So does Riana get help to deal with her anorexia? Did you adopt the plot in another more well-read FF because we readers here aren't doing your authoring justice in reviewing? I think it's just that the traffic isn't high, but it will come! Is the completed FF posted in another HP portal?
Love your pace. And the OCs. Too bad I wouldn't have come across this story if not for the random FF spinner.
I have been reading your story avidly since the beginning. Good work, though I wish the girl would eat!
Wow ... a much longer chapter! I have about thirty seconds to review, so I'll just say that that was great, and I can't wait till they get to Hogwarts. I'm glad Fabian will be looking out for her!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Oh, I know ... it was very long. I'm not too fond of it, actually, so I'm going to rewrite it and then resubmit it. I'm glad you enjoyed it though. Your reviews, as always, truly encourage me! :-)I, too, cannot WAIT until they get to Hogwarts ... it's been too long. :-PThanks again!~Julia~
Ooh ... what an unusual idea! I'm looking forward to finding out exactly what happened in that chapter. Does Leanne know that Riana is at the Leaky Cauldron now?I thoroughly enjoyed your writing in that chapter, particularly this : "Carefully ignoring the prone figure frozen on the bed, Riana’s evading gaze hurriedly glanced at the floor where the broken glass from the photograph mixed with the fibers of pink carpet, creating a sparkling mélange of color as it was touched by the pinpricks of moonlight from the room’s open windows."Really lovely. Well done! :)
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thanks for your complimentary review, :). I'm so pleased that you are still enjoying the story.
I'm so glad, too, that you liked the idea for this chapter--it has been the one that most people have complaints against. Some feel it's too vague, others don't understand the point. However, rest assured that there is, indeed, significance in that blue book with the bronze writing. Hee!
I believe that the way in which I wrote it explains why most people find a hard time enjoying it, :-S. This chapter was very similar to my one-shot, "The Ultimate Trust" in that it was very image-oriented and had less of a storyline. Most people don't like that. But I'm thrilled that you tapped into that. Kudos to you for being observant! :P
And about Leanne, yes, she knows that Riana is alive, anyway. But she doesn't know--and I believe I can tell you this without ruining anything--that Riana is at the Leaky Cauldron. There are other things, though, that she does know...Hee! But I won't say what they are.
My utmost thanks, again, for your endlessly wonderful reviews. They truly encourage me. :)
~Julia~
how strange...very interesting...
more. :)
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thanks for R&R-ing. I hope you enjoyed it. :) More should be around soon... but no rushing, eh? We want the next chapter to be good, too. :P Hee!
~Julia~
Response from togspled (Reviewer)
i want to say rush, but i know you're right. take it slow. make it good. (as i know you will.)thank u!
Really nice chapter. I love the way Fabian is having a positive effect on her ... he's good for her.Your writing is getting more and more fluid ... keep it up!And ... can't wait to find out who her parents are! More ... and SOON!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you, as always, for your lovely comments. This was one of my more ... eloquent chapters, I suppose you could say, hee! Just kidding... but, really, I'm grateful to you for your kind words.
I, too, am glad that Riana now has Fabian. He's not perfect, but I love him to death. :)
And... I'm afraid you'll have to wait a bit longer to truly know who Riana's parents are. *pulls face* There are aspects of her history that I wouldn't want an eleven-year-old to know. So, years must pass until she finds out the Truth. *giggles and points at the capital T*
Anyway, thanks so much for your comment and I'm going to go and read/review the newest chapter in "Where My Future Lies." :)
~Julia~
Response from little beloved (Reviewer)
*
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
swoons and faints*. YEARS??? We have to wait for YEARS until we find out the Truth (capital T!)???Cruel! Intriguing, though! :) Gosh ... and I thought I was cruel for stringing things along!Gotta go read your new chappie now!BTW: I was slightly incorrect about the inventor of the entrail-expelling curse. It was Urquhart Rackharrow, chapter 22 of OotP.
riana and fabian are so cute together! this mystery about her parents is fascinating. (and i can't wait to see what fabian thinks is 'real fun')
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you so much for your review. :) I'm so glad that you are enjoying Riana and Fabian's time together.
The mystery, yes... that will all be revealed in good time. I'm so glad you're intrigued; your enthusiasm truly encourages me.
Fabian... well, not this next chapter, but the one after that... that will show a bit of Fabian's definition of 'real' fun. :P Not all... but then, Riana's not a werecat either. Thus, she wouldn't be able to accompany him on his nighttime jaunts, more's the pity. :(
Thank you again, though, for your lovely review. I love getting them.
~Julia~
Wonderful! Well written, as always, and Padma Patil is a most welcome addition!There is only one thing I would like to point out, and it is not something you could be exptected to know if you haven't been to Britain. I live in Ireland, lived in England for two years, and make many trips to London/Scotland. Biscuits with gravy (especially the white kind) are an entirely American phenomenon, and would never be found in any pubs/restaurants/diners in Europe. They simply don't exist here. Gravy here is runny and brown, made from meat stock, and biscuits here are what you refer to as cookies.I went to the U.S for the first time in January, and came across 'biscuits with gravy' ... and was very puzzled indeed! There are so many differences between our cultures and U.K/U.S English ... it's quite mind-boggling!Okay ... rambling finished now! Anyway, as I said, I thoroughly enjoyed that chapter, and look forward to the next! Well done! :)
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you for your lovely comments and also for your con. crit. Those comments really help me, I wish I could get more of them, hee! But I will change it right away!
I had no idea that "biscuits" weren't available with (American) gravy. *gasp* It seems to be a main staple on restaurant/cafe' menus here in America.
Again, thank you ever so much for R&R-ing as well as for the correction. :)
~Julia~
Response from little beloved (Reviewer)
You're very welcome! If I had to write a fic set in the U.S, I would be completely lost as regards many things, such as food.I see so many Americanisms creeping into HP fics. A very common one is 'pinkie' ... a word never used here. We simply call it a 'little finger'.Having said that, my beta (who is American) is forever finding Irishisms in my work. Even between England and Ireland there are so many differences in phrases and sayings.Can't what for chapter 12!
Response from little beloved (Reviewer)
Can't what for chapter 12!!!???Can't wait for chapter 12, obviously! ;)
i love your descriptions of the books! ~~Or so she thought…~~ that has me interested indeed...
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thanks very much,
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
! :) It really encourages me that you like the story and find it intriguing. I enjoyed writing the descriptions of the books very much.
And you shall see ... what "~~Or so she thought...~~" meant. Oh, yes ... you shall certainly see. :)
~Julia~
Well done, well written and you obviously have done your homework with all those books ... lots from Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them etc ... I'm looking forward to her meeting students and getting some dialogue going!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Why thank you, :). Yes, if there's one thing I can do ... it's my homework. *grimaces slightly* Although homework for HP is much better than homework for ... anything else. :)
There will be plenty of dialogue in the following chapters, however there is so much background to cover that the first chapters are rather limited in dialogue. Never fear! There are great things to come.
Thanks so much for R&R-ing.
~Julia~
great intro to diagon alley!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you very much. I love writing about Gringotts because it is such an amazing place! Me and my "dusty balustrades," *sigh*
Hee! Thanks again for R&R-ing.
~Julia~
Another good chapter :) Am getting imaptient for her to meet some witches/wizards now, though!Keep up the good work!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you for your review. I assume you've just started reading the story? :)
And there will soon be contact with witches and wizards, hee! :) Chapter after next, I believe...
Again, thanks so much for your review--it was very encouraging!
~Julia~
riana's anorexia seems to be getting worse, poor girl. it'll be interesting to see how that affects her at Hogwarts.
I never would have thought old Tom could make a smoothie! haha...
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Well, thank you, :). Personally, that wasn't my favorite chappie, however, I'm glad that you are still sensing Riana's conflict.
Tom is very talented, hee! The only problem is that he doesn't want anybody to see that, *shiftily looks left and right*
Thank you so much for R&Ring.
~Julia~
This is such an interesting story. I'm so glad to have discovered it! Looking forward to your next update!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you so much! :) I'm thrilled that you are enjoying the story. I didn't want it to be run-of-the-mill, which has caused a smidge of trouble when getting it validated on other sites! Hee! (Something about 'delicate issues...') :P
However, I'm very glad that you have found my story and the next chapter is in queue, so it should be up soon.
~Julia~
What a very different and interesting story! I'm so glad you reviewed mine, or I might not have discovered this!Well written and intriguing ... reading on now!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Oh, thank you so much! I'm so glad I reviewed yours, too, or I might not have ever found it! (That's slightly confusing, but you get the picture, hee!)
Thank you, again, for your kind comments.
~Julia~
Nice start, i like it, please continue soon!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you very much for your review! It encourages me ever so much that you like my story! :)
The next chapter is in queue, so it should be up soon.
~Julia~
And ... I'm so looking forward to her upcoming journey to Hogwarts!!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Oh, thank you very much! I'm sorry that it was such a short chapter, but I'm very glad that you enjoyed it! :)
~Julia~
Response from notsosaintly (Reviewer)
Short chapters are nice ... and sometimes they are essential. As in this case; it was a pivotal point. Now, I'm really looking forward to the next chapter!
omg...parseltongue. riana is a very complex character! (and definitely a true slytherin?) great job
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you very much! I'm so glad you find her interesting. The last thing in the world that I wanted to do was create a "Mary Sue." :) Considering, however, that she's her own person, that wasn't too difficult at all! Thanks for R & R - ing ... I really appreciate it!
~Julia~
Yes, Riana will definitely be sorted into Slytherin. You captured Leanne's feelings very well. Being a mom myself I could feel her desperation. You really have a way of capturing feelings in your writing. I am enjoying this story and looking forward to more!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Hehe, how'd you guess? I'm kidding... yes, I did want her to be in Slytherin. We always hear such bad things about the Slytherins and I wanted to look at the whole "magic" situation from a 'Snake's' position. :)
Thank you very much for your kind review!
~Julia~
Yes, I should be assigned detention with Professor Snape for not reviewing until now. You really have created suspense with this chapter. I loved the detail, her search for the key. It reminded me of similar personal pursuits. But the end, with her mom coming into the kitchen and her trying to look normal, like she wasn't up to anything... well, I could feel my heart thumping in my chest as if I were a teenager again and was definitely up to something. Well done!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Wow. What great praise! :) Thanks very much for your kindness. I'm glad you're enjoying the story. And it's fine that you haven't reviewed 'till now... you've read them, at least. :)
Again, thanks very, very much!
~Julia~
oh i just love it when u post another chapter!
the story is coming along so very nicely. keep it up!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thanks very much for R&R-ing. *smiles*
I'm so glad you like the story. :) Also, Riana will soon get to Hogwarts, just stick with her, please. The story is taking its own precious time, but I think it will turn out all right ... at least I hope so, hee! :)
~Julia~
Ooooh! Urquhart! Wasn't he that entrail-expelling curse chappie?And yay! His Mum's Irish. Gosh, it looks like this is going to be a seriously long story! Any idea how many chapters?Enjoying ... as always!
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Hmm.. not sure about the "entrail-expelling" but he was the captain of Slytherin Quidditch team at one point. :)
I love Favel (plus her name is so fun!) She was a pleasure to write, even though she is a very minor character ... at this point. Hee!
About the length, hmm, well... I really don't know how long it's going to be. *laughs uneasily* I was going to try and make it 30 chapters, however, the length of some of the chapters is so short. I simply ended where I felt a cliffhanger would do well. They just happened. I'm sure you know what I mean. :)
Now, though, I'm thinking that I may do volumes of Riana's life. You know, Serpent in the Moonlight: Volume One. This one details her first year. Serpent in the Moonlight: Volume Two... and so on and so forth. A bit like the HP books, but not. There's just so much information about her that I want to share and she can't discover everything in her first year ... that much knowledge would kill her, poor thing. :( Honestly, I have some ghastly stuff planned for her in the future. I'm so mean. Hee! *snickers evilly*
Anyway, that was a really long post. *sigh* I should have just said "Thank You," except that I love getting your reviews and your feedback. Talking to much again... must go. Thanks so much!
~Julia~
so there's still pureblood-mania so long after the HP events? that's intriguing. i'm eager to learn the missing history there. fabian's character is getting more and more complex...
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Oh, as long as there are purebloods, there will be pureblood mania. :) I'm glad you are intrigued by Fabian's character ... the last thing in the world I wanted to do was make him "flat." *cough Ron & Hermione cough cough* Hee! Just kidding... only in canon, not in fanon. :D
I love getting your reviews! :) Thanks so very, very much.
~Julia~
great byplay between riana and fabian. he seems like he'll be good for her with his friendly nature and everything. if only he could convince her to eat a licorice wand...
Response from Celestial Melody (Author of Serpent in the Moonlight)
Thank you so much for your lovely compliments. I do plan to continue Fabian as a foil to Riana ... if only he could get her to eat that Licorice Wand, hee! :)
~Julia~