Greed Beyond Avarice - Part Two
Chapter 3 of 22
nagandsevAbraxas, Lucius and Nagini visit the family's vault, full of unpleasant surprises; Severus and Regulus meet up with Hagrid at the Leaky Cauldron for butterbeer and dirty secrets.
Chapter Three: Greed Beyond Avarice Part Two
As Abraxas, Lucius, and Nagini walked away from Gringotts Wizarding Bank towards Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions, what had happened over an hour ago in the Malfoy family vault of Gringotts kept going over and over in Nagini's mind. It had only been less than twenty-four hours that she had been placed in custodial care to her uncle, Abraxas Malfoy, by the Ministry of Magic's Department of Magical Law Enforcement; she felt lost and unwanted in a whirlwind of events that were still incomprehensible to her.
Abraxas had had an anxious, irritable energy about him from the very moment Nagini came downstairs in the morning at Malfoy Mansion. His ill-temperedness continued on through to the security clearance at the long counter in the vast marble hall of Gringotts.
The goblin clerk, Griphook, had asked first for Nagini's wand for identity purposes. Abraxas winced at the goblins disconcerting request. "Why is that necessary? I have a registered letter from the Ministry, explaining her unusual circumstances."
"We've already been informed by Mr Bartemius Crouch, from the Ministry, of Miss Nagini Malfoy's peculiar status," stated the goblin slyly.
Savoring Abraxas' embarrassment, Griphook offered a half-cocked leer to Abraxas and continued, "As a means to monitoring Miss Malfoy's whereabouts and activities, Mr Crouch has sent us a memorandum, a warning, and an addendum for regulating Miss Malfoy's activities here at our establishment. A special security procedure to gain entrance necessitates extra cautionary regulations in her exceptional case."
Disgruntled, but obliging, Abraxas reached inside his cloak and pulled out an ebony, marble textured wand with three small emerald stones embedded on the top part of the handle.
Admiringly, Griphook took it, and peering at Nagini, asked, "Do you solemnly swear that you are Nagini Malfoy, daughter of Lucretia Malfoy and blood kin to Abraxas Malfoy?"
"I do," said Nagini.
"Take the wand," instructed Griphook.
Nagini reached out, and as she fully clasped her wand in her hands, a slight glow and power emanated forth from it.
Satisfied, Griphook asked, "And your key?"
Impatiently, Abraxas informed him, "She has no key, if you would read," he was thrusting a sealed parchment at Griphook, "this will explain and overrule any ..."
Cutting Abraxas off, Nagini informed Griphook, "I have the key." Pulling out a delicate, silver chained necklace with an oval pendant, she opened it up and took out a miniature golden key.
"Thank you," said Griphook, taking the key and examining it. Then, he turned to Abraxas and asked, "Mr Malfoy, your wand?"
"What?!" Abraxas growled indignantly.
"The Ministry insists..." Griphook emphasised.
Abraxas unsnapped and pulled out from the sheathed upper section of his silver, serpent-headed cane, his wand, and handed it over to Griphook. Abraxas was now infuriated beyond all measures, but managed to keep control, glaring at the goblin.
"Mr Lucius?" asked Griphook smugly.
Lucius begrudgingly deferred and pulled out his wand, handing it over to Griphook.
After verifying each one, Griphook returned the wands to the Malfoys, Abraxas pocketing both his own and Nagini's wand. And then, Griphook made a courteous, peculiar bow-like gesture to Nagini, and said, "Welcome to Gringotts, Miss Nagini Malfoy. My condolences about your mother; she was a most gracious and cooperative client of ours. We do hope to service your needs as well as we did hers."
It was poignantly odd. The goblin was speaking as if her mother had just recently died, when it had been over eight years ago. Moreover, it was not known for goblins to feel compelled to show any niceties towards wizards, other than perfunctory ones.
"Thank you. Thank you, I'm sure you shall. I hope I shan't be a very demanding customer, Mr Griphook," she replied awkwardly.
"May we proceed? We've rather urgent business to attend to elsewhere, Griphook," Abraxas stated gruffly.
"Of course, Mr. Malfoy. This way, this way. Follow me." Griphook led them to one of the numerous doors outlining the large marble hall. They descended down the narrow stone passage to a sconced area and waited near the tracks for a cart. One appeared immediately, and they climbed in; the cart whisked them away, deep down into the lowest depths of Gringotts.
On arriving in front of the vault, and after Griphook had opened it, they stepped inside into a vast cavernous room filled to the brim on one side with galleons and jewels, cryptic artifacts, and objects from all corners of the world. Abraxas immediately grabbed Nagini by the arm and decisively steered her to the far right corner of the room. There, set aside, was a small, octangular chest in the midst of piles of galleons and jewels.
"Open it!" commanded Abraxas.
"My wand?" asked Nagini. "I'll need it."
Abraxas, his eyes narrowing in suspicion, slowly pulled out Nagini's wand from his inside cape pocket. As she made to take it from him, he pulled her into him with a strong jerk.
"Don't even think about using it for any other purpose other than to open the chest," warned Abraxas.
Although the thought was more than crossing Nagini's mind, her fingers itched to detrimentally hex Abraxas, she pointed it at the chest, "Alohamora!"
A coruscated flash ricocheted off the little chest, seemingly unchanged.
Nagini stepped forward and knelt down, clumsily trying to push the bulky texture of the lid upward, but it was still sealed.
Impatiently grabbing Nagini's wand out of her hand, Abraxas said, "Can't you see it's heavily warded against wand spells... " As Abraxas slipped her wand inside his cloak, he silently deliberated with himself, his eyes darting from Nagini to the chest. With a grim countenance, he pondered what to do next. A new thought then came to Abraxas, and he said, "We must try Blood Magic. Give me your arm!" Eagerly, not waiting for her to offer it, Abraxas grabbed Nagini's left arm, pulling her sleeve back, and with a quick flick of his wand, he muttered a Diffindo spell. A large gash appeared along her wrist, "Now! Now you stupid girl, the incantations!"
As Nagini whispered fiercely, repeating variants of spells, Abraxas was squeezing around the cut area, helping her blood drop profusely on the top of the metallic locked area. As each drop made contact with the metal, a slight hissing issued forth from the contact, a mist appeared, and then it vaporised completely. The lid remained sealed shut.
Exasperated, Abraxas pushed Nagini down, his heightened irritability distorting his facial features. His cane came down, hitting her across her upper back. She hit the chest front with a braced thud and painful grunt.
Then, in the heat of the moment, a flash of realisation occurred to her. She sat back on her bended knees, and holding onto the chest for support, her eyes burning with smoldering energy, Nagini whispered in a hiss that eerily echoed around the vault, "Alohamora." But this time, it was in snake language, Parseltongue. The sealed lid broke open.
Abraxas and Lucius had frozen, startled by her Parselmouth ability.
But then, Abraxas, quickly recovering himself, jaunted over to the chest, and shoving Nagini aside, he opened the lid and plunged into it. Knocking various objects around, he suddenly let out an excitable hiss, "Yes! Here it is. At long last!" He slowly took out a small, plain rectangular case.
With bated breath, Abraxas whispered an incantation. The closed seal on the case popped open. He slowly raised the top covering. Inside was a black object with highlights of crimson gold, catching the sconced lighting. Abraxas lifted it, reverently, out of the case. Octagonal in shape and half the size of one's palm, he held it up to the light, delicately turning it around, closely examining it.
Triumphant, Abraxas said to Lucius, "This, my son, is what buys Ministerial officials; this is what buys their favors for you. It is what empires have been built on!"
"A periapt of sorts?" whispered Lucius. "The Midas amulet?"
"Yes," said Abraxas beaming. "The Midas amulet! Very ancient. Very rare. Our family's wealth has been built on it. It can transform any non-magical creature or object into Galleon gold. To be used discreetly, of course. And cautiously," he warned. "No wasting it on filthy Muggles, as if anyone would want to buy or sell their putrid carcasses, even if they were made of gold."
"Here!" Abraxas had reached back into the chest and taken out another object. He threw a small heavy book at Nagini. "Don't ever say I never gave you anything of hers!"
Nagini took the little book in her hands. It was tethered around the edges, and its cover had a faded emblem, which had long ago been engraved into the dragonskin surface. With trepidation, she put it inside her inner cloak pocket and looked back up to watch the Masters Malfoy gloating over the Midas amulet. Nagini rose, disgusted, and stared at Abraxas' gluttonous exuberance.
Abraxas, seeing the disdainful and challenging look of Nagini's, snarled, "Your mother stole this from the family's vault years ago, carrying it off with her to the continent. No doubt using it to pay for her philandering and escapades. Leaving the family behind to scrimp and scrape by as we could. To fend for itself by any means."
"Seems like you've fended for yourself pretty well," quipped Nagini.
Abraxas turned fully around and took a step towards her. Relishing what he was disclosing to her, he sneered, "She was a selfish, greedy, indulgent little tart, who got what she deserved in the end." Satisfied with the pained look on Nagini's face, he smiled exultingly and said, "But now, all is right with the world. All shall be well again." He let out a long sigh of relief.
"Greed beyond avarice," Nagini commented simply.
Abraxas and Lucius both turned to her.
"What did you say, girl?" asked Abraxas.
Mustering her courage, Nagini repeated, "Greed beyond avarice!"
"Meaning?" asked Lucius, his jaw clenching.
"Meaning... our illustrious family has obviously been controlled, all these ages, by greed beyond avarice." Nagini stared directly at Abraxas. "You said my mother was selfish and greedy... How could she not be? She was just logically following the family's natural inclinations. Just like you." Wanting to smite his ego a bit more, she persisted, "She was the same as you. You are just the same as her. No better, no worse."
Abraxas walked slowly over to Nagini, stopping in front of her. They stared at each other in silence.
Then, Abraxas broke the silence. "Logically?" he pondered, his eyes flickered over her face. "Logic has nothing to do with it, my dear girl." He smiled malevolently at her.
In a flash, his backhand slap came hard and directly down on the right side of Nagini's face, knocking her off balance; she stumbled back towards the chest and fell down beside it on top of a heap of galleons.
Abraxas' ring had caught her cheekbone and dug into her skin, making a cut downward on her face.
Nagini's cheek, the incised skin, bled profusely.
Determinedly, Abraxas strode over to Nagini. Dragging her half upwards, he backhanded her hard again in the same spot. Throwing her down, he began to pace like a panther in the claustrophobic space. Then, suddenly turning around, in a flash, Abraxas whipped out his wand from his cane staff and roared out, "Crucio!"
Nagini had never had this curse used upon her before; she had never experienced the retching agony of it. Writhing and screaming in blinding electrical pain, Nagini felt as if her brain and internal organs were going to explode from her body, as the razor sharp juts of energy were encasing her.
"Father!" Lucius whispered fiercely, "The goblins!"
"They know their place,'' snarled Abraxas.
Watching Nagini's twitching slowly subside, Abraxas crossed over to her, bent down, and dragged Nagini halfway up to a kneeling position. Ferociously, Abraxas whispered, "You're going to... redeem yourself! Rather, atone for your mother... " Seeing something uncanny in Nagini's eyes, he winced and released her, watching her collapse back down again.
Glaring at Nagini, Abraxas cursed, "Damn you both!"
*****************************************************+
"We have to hurry," urged Regulus, as he and Severus made their way through Diagon Alley's winding backstreets from Gringotts. "Hagrid's to meet us at the Leaky Cauldron at noon."
"Hagrid?" asked Severus, surprised.
"Yes." Regulus' face was flushed with excitement. "Hagrid's promised me that he could get hold of some rare torquoise-coral peacock eggs. Cissy adores albino peacocks and partridges. I thought I'd surprise her with a pair of peacocks. They'll hatch around the time of the wedding this summer."
"Are Hagrid's sources reliable?" Severus asked sceptically, doubtful of the gamekeeper's abilities to procure anything of rare value.
"Well, he's assured me that some of his contacts would be able to attain them, and I'm willing to pay a pretty price. I'd asked Slughorn himself, but he was a bit standoffish about the whole thing, so I went to plan B Hagrid. He's surprisingly resourceful, Severus. Try him some time; he can find anything."
"Obviously," Severus commented gibingly.
Upon arriving, they entered the Leaky Cauldron and quickly spotted Hagrid in a corner; he was seated with four empty mugs of butterbeer in front of him and working on a fifth one. Scattered about the table and in surrounding chairs were various parcels and roughly shaped boxes, some with straw and mixed leaves sticking out of the random cracks and crooks of the bulging packages.
"Eh, Regulus! Over 'ere!" called Hagrid.
Greeting him, Regulus said, "Good day, Hagrid. You know Severus, here."
"Yup, I do. 'ow are yeh boys today, both fine?"
"Great, but in a bit of a rush. Would have been here earlier, but we had to stop by Gringotts first. We ran into the Malfoys on the way. Do you know that Abraxas' has a niece? She'll be attending Hogwarts next week."
"What? She's out already?" boomed Hagrid, shocked.
"Out? Out of where, Hagrid?" asked Severus.
"Why, the Ministry's gaol fer detainin' under-aged wizards accused of serious crimes. Ol' Barty Crouch is overseein' the whole thing, he bein' on the special Council fer Magical Law, an' all. Peculiar case. Yeh met 'er, yer did?"
"Why, yes, she was with Abraxas and Lucius, actually," informed Regulus.
Gregariously taking a swig of butterbeer, Hagrid announced, "Well, the whole lot of 'em are bad ... bad blood, always 'ave been, an' always will, I reckon."
"But what exactly is she accused of?" asked Severus, in a clipped tone.
"Accused of? Guilty, is more like it. Murder. Accidentally on purpose, more like, mind yeh. But, that's not fer me ter say or ter judge. Ol' Abraxas has a wily lawyer, he does. Ol' Lester Qualmsick, top o' his trade. He's known ter be quite pernicious, he is, ol' Qualmsick."
"The Lester Qualmsick, of the Wizengamot Qualmsicks?" Severus asked, astounded.
"That's the one. I've been runnin' parchments an' errands fer Dumbledore, to an' fro' the Ministry an' Hogwarts the past two weeks until I'm giddy about it, I am. That's 'ow I know."
Severus frowned. He was wondering whether it was the butterbeer speaking, or concrete facts that Hagrid was spewing out. Concerned, Severus said, "Murder is indeed a serious charge, Hagrid. The Ministry's proof?"
"Proof? The dead body of a Durmstrang student, hexed by 'er, he was... that's the proof; but," pausing to lick his lips, Hagrid continued, "ol' Qualmsick found a loophole in it all. It seems," he lowered his voice, "it wasn' an Unforgivable she used, but an Incendio hex o' sorts... never yeh mind, it's what led ter his death anyway."
Severus and Regulus stared at each other in disbelief for a second.
Regulus urged Hagrid on, "You can't leave us on a limb here, Hagrid; fill us in a bit more."
"Mind yer, it's ter go no further than between the three of us."
"Of course it won't," quipped Severus,
"Well, mind yeh, the Ministry's Department fer Unlawful Usage of Magic by Under-Aged Wizards had insisted as part o' the probationary agreement that Dumbledore would be the legally responsible guardian fer 'er, once she arrives at Hogwarts, that is - in fact, it was Dumbledore 'imself who insisted on it as part of the release conditions, mind yeh, before allowin' Miss Nagini Malfoy to come to Hogwarts."
The two Slytherins sat there dumbfounded, but, nevertheless, enthralled by what Hagrid was telling them, and continued to listen on.
*************************************************
In actual fact, after an excruciatingly long trial and following a gritty meeting of the Wizarding Council for Under-Aged Wizards, Nagini had finally been released from the Ministry of Magic's Department of Magical Law Enforcement on probationary terms that she would be allowed to go, at large, but conditionally, under the strict supervision of her uncle Abraxas, or in his stead, her cousin, Lucius, as he was now of age, and the next of kin, blood relative.
The Headmaster of Hogwarts, Albus Dumbledore, had proposed himself to be appointed with custodial care of Nagini, once she would be within the grounds of Hogwarts. Even though the young witch would turn of age in February, her probationary period would last past the legal age of seventeen years until the age of nineteen due to the harshness of the accusations. For had it not been for her yet not being of age, Nagini would have been clamped and sent immediately to Azkaban.
Which is what Bartemius Crouch, chief prosecutor of the Council of Wizarding Law Council, precisely wanted to do. Crouch had insisted on holding Nagini in custody until she turned seventeen, which would be less than a month away. Crouch demanded that she would then be sent directly to Azkaban, to rot and suffer the Dementors, so outraged and disgusted was he with the case.
However, Abraxas had paid for one of the shrewdest advocates Galleons could buy (in more ways than one). His 'wily' family lawyer, Lester Qualmsick, knowing Crouch's mentality well and having been born into a long line of Wizengamot judges and counselors himself, dealt speedily and cleverly against all of Crouch's propositions.
Nagini had been accused of murder. Technically, Qualmsick argued as her defence counsel, she was not guilty. Using Priori Incantatem on Nagini's wand in front of the Council, he proved her wand's last hex. It had indeed been an Incendio hex that she had used against the Durmstrang student. But once set on fire, he had, naturally in the torturous pain, panicked, running and thrashing about, and had fallen backwards off an open-sided stone staircase, plummeting to his death. And this, not the hex, 'technically', Qualmsick pointed out, caused the young wizard's death.
With this point being laboriously debated, and after several days of animated riffling through ancient and appendaged laws, the verdict of the Wizengamot's panel was decided as 'not guilty' for first-degree murder, though other charges of aggravated assault and of a second-degree nature were ruled as guilty.
Bartemius Crouch, shaking with fury at the outcome and with visible difficulty, proclaimed the final verdict, "Nagini Malfoy, we have found you guilty of second-degree wizardslaughter; due process forces the Wizengamot to hereby decree that you shall for the continuance remainder of your under-aged time and thereafter, until the age of nineteen, be sentenced to home arrest under the scrutiny and probationary supervision of your uncle, Abraxas Malfoy, or in his stead, his son, Lucius Malfoy. Furthermore, your whereabouts, actions, transactions and schooling activities shall be monitored by both the Wizarding Law Enforcement officers, as well as under the auspices of Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."
And with further adjudged proclamations regarding appellate requests, the importance of good behaviour, and the conditions for reviewing her case in the future by the Wizengamot, the trial was adjourned.
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Latest 25 Reviews for A Nagini and Severus Tale
77 Reviews | 8.27/10 Average
WOW. You just left me speechless.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much for reading and for your feedback, truly appreciate it!
Phew... I got so engrossed reading the chapters one after the other that I just forgot to review! This chapter was amazing... I particularly liked (I know that's not an appropriate word here) the interaction between Lily and Sev... it seemed like a missing page from the JKR books... thanks for rediscovering it for us! Also enjoyed the really adorable first kiss:)... Looking forward to a beautiful relationship that would heal two scarred hearts!
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Dearest
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you for continuing to read this, and so happy that you are enjoying it--had to explore some interaction between him and Lily as she was so influential on him... Needed to explore what a first kiss would be like between these two at this point, so I'm happy that it came across as intended. Again, thank you for reading and your feedback, truly appreciate it!
It's such an amazingly original idea to portray Nagini as a Malfoy girl who is so different from the rest of her family! I wonder where the Malfoys got that name from, though! Nagini is the Sanskrit word for a female serpent and I have been traditionally intrigued by Jo's choice of name for Voldie's serpent! :P
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much for reading, truly appreciate it! This was my first attempt into the wonderful universe of HP fanfiction💕Hmm... I'm trying to finish off the last chapters, so since meeting you, maybe I can write in some justification for the name... At this point, I can't change her biological origin for this tale... but maybe her mother traveled to India when in hiding from Voldy, before becoming impregnated, and became inspired/enlightened by some Sanskrit parchments she came across... hmmm, I'll reflect on it--and dedication to you!:-)Thank you again!
Response from MayavanavihariniHarini (Reviewer)
Lol! That's again an amazing idea. And that would explain a lot of things too, considering that a Nagini (in the Hindu mythology context) is often capable of changing into a beautiful (and often potentially dangerous) human female. Could our Nagini be like that? Well, we have to find out!:)
PS: I think I NOW know the reason for your unique penname!:)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
In gratitude for assistance offered, namaste,
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Response from MayavanavihariniHarini (Reviewer)
Ah, namaste dear!
A chapter of action and revelations.For this chapter, the snake bearer arises and the snake in two parts is a symbol of duplicity.Damphna and Lucretia betray Grindewald.Severus demonstrates himself worthy of the Dark Lord who he now hates and will soon plan to betray.Nagini accepts becoming a hit witch, joining those who killed her caretaker, but possiby planning revenge against their leader.Nagini compartmentalizing her life, fooling herself.One might make a wild guess on first reading canon that Severus's cruelty is a mask and reaction against his caring nature, betraying himself.The perspicacious Narcissa is shocked at her own fate.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Dearest
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you for continuing to read this and for your generous feedback in the review--it means so very much to me, truly deeply value and appreciate you taking the time to let me know what is coming across in this long-winded tale! The next chapter will continue to push the action and further revelations, I hope to answer most if not all of the back/side story of Lucretia, Dymphna, Grindewald, Abraxas, etc. , as well (if I can get it 'right') as moving on with the Nag, Sev, Narcissa, et alia in the present/main storyline. I'm realising that instead of one more chapter, I'll need at least three... Yes, canon Severus seems to have worn many masks, hiding (and yes, absolutely, betraying) his caring nature and yet wishing for something elusive and/or embittered/consumed by the lack of it, or 'a man hagridden by the future' (interpreted by me as 'tormented by his life') as the singular C.S. Lewis described some, etc. Yes, Nagini is in a fluctuating state--her decision(s) to be made in the next chapter. And Narcissa... as revealed by the end of the HP canon, she (along with Severus) had the power to deceive and conceal her thoughts and feelings from Voldemort himself, let alone Severus, Lucius, Bellatrix... She is one of the many underwritten characters in fanfic imho, and I'll try not to get too derailed from the main plot with her--lol!--she just preoccupies me sometimes, and I wanted to give a nod to her and her predicament/fate. Again, thank you so very much for your thoughts and observations, can't quite find the proper words to thank you enough... Wishing you all the best, now and for the New Year!
The impression is that of a bridging chapter, but one where emotions are gathering below the surface and getting ready to explode.Deprived of nurturing when young, Severus clings to any sign of friendship and romance. Does that explain his continued attachment to Lily even though he has found Nagini? He could sneer and say Lily got the prat she deserved.Finally get a hint at what Nagini's mother did - excessive ambition and pride, a Frankenstein scenario.Would a memory loss obliterate her attraction to Severus? It appears to be returning at the end.Bit of irony having Pandora warn Xenophilius about being cautious with spells.Dumbledore takes Nagini away from people who would be her friends and who can even admire her mother although they would say her mother did transgress if they learned what she had done. He dumps her among her tormentors.As always, clear elucidation of complex plot and characters.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, truly, deeply appreciate it! Yes, things are about to explode, in the next chapter, exactly, on several levels. It seems that Severus has a deep unreasonable fixation attachment to Lily, truly obssessed with her from early in his life--an obsession that carved a deep groove within that he blindly associates with a kind of 'goodness' he had never known, being deprived so as he was... He seems to have had very limited exposure--his persistent preoccupations with people will be explored and highlighted in the remaining chapters--but I agree and perhaps he will put Lily and her prat in a box, label it, and throw it away on an old shelf to rot.:-)Yes, more explicit information and details of Nagini's mother's actions (and others) in the next chapter, her and her cronies' endless sub-plot laid out fully and put to rest. Nagini's memory loss will be shown to have been selective, obliterated selectively, and the question of can an emotion 'record' be stronger than a mental record, either exist without the other, or will one enhance and strengthen the other to full retainment? Yes, perhaps bad taste about the Pandora and Xeno comment about dubious, untested spells--but I couldn't resist... I meant it as more bitter irony, as Luna's mother could only have been quite a unique persona, such a shame she died the way she did.Keenly seen by you, Dumbledore's plans for Nagini will be to prove a point of his, one of several actually, without leniency, an 'all or nothing' scenario... All the loose ends will be tied together--currently working on the last three chapters, simultaneously--lol! (will ty to get them down to maybe two if I can compact the narrative and dialogues and tie together everything... We'll see). Thank you again for your incredible feedback and inspiring observations--nourishment for the Muse, and always deeply grateful,
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
!
Response from MHaydn (Reviewer)
The irony about Pandora is not in bad taste at all. It says she is more concerned about Xenopilius thqn about herself. It is a rich chapter with more than mentioned in the review: Narcissa steps forward, the contrast of the schoolboy bullying of Sirius with the adult evil of Lucius, the portrait of Slughorn eager not to ruffle powerful feathers.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much for contnuing to read and for the generous feedback,
Thank you for another wonderful chapter!
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Dearest
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you so much for reading this and the review--truly appreciate your kind feedback!
A seemingly straight-forward chapter but numerous undercurrents are playing themselves out.
How did the Dark Lord and company know they would be gathering horklumps? The runespoor is replaying the Garden of Eden. What is Rodophus's interest in Nagini? Anything besides lust? (It's been a long time since I read the previous chapters.) Dumbledores's reason for keeping Nagini away from the Malfoys may be to keep her away from their evil influence when the intent should be to protect her.
There does seem to be a belief running through magic fiction that once touched by the Dark, a person is not redeemable. (I am reminded of the oath required of all US Civil Servants: "I am not now nor have I ever been a member of the Communist Party.")
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much for reading and for the feedback! Yes, it's a turning point; a certain Slytherin Head Boy let it slip out about the nature of their detention (in next chapter), to the convenience of the Dark Lord & Rodolphus/company. For Rodolphus, having possessed Nagini sexually represents several things to him (more later on that), but mostly a warped game between him and Lucius of sorts. Dumbledore will have an overall reason for wishing to keep her away from the Malfoys and their support of the Dark Lord and accompanying agendas; he'll attempt to protect as long as its needed for his purposes as well.Hmmm... the matter of redeemablility... will be explored. Love the quote! Immediately thought of it applying to Dumbledore somehow first--lol!Thank you again, truly appreciate your commentary and insight!
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much for reading and for the feedback! Yes, it's a turning point; a certain Slytherin Head Boy let it slip out about the nature of their detention (in next chapter), to the convenience of the Dark Lord & Rodolphus/company. For Rodolphus, having possessed Nagini sexually represents several things to him (more later on that), but mostly a warped game between him and Lucius of sorts. Dumbledore will have an overall reason for wishing to keep her away from the Malfoys and their support of the Dark Lord and accompanying agendas; he'll attempt to protect as long as its needed for his purposes as well.Hmmm... the matter of redeemablility... will be explored. Love the quote! Immediately thought of it applying to Dumbledore somehow first--lol!Thank you again, truly appreciate your commentary and insight!
McNair, Nott, Goyle, and Regulus are acting like adolesents, which they are. Narcissa and Bellatrix are coquetes, each in her own way. Lucius is acting mature, partly because he has been trained to do so and partly because in is in the throes of romance, which everyone knows and accepts. Nagini is flustered. Severus is acting mature, but no one takes exception to this, which is odd because adults do not take kindly to an adolescent not acting his age.Severus wants to oomfort Nagini, but he only plans to ease her hurt after Abraxas has finished with her. He does not plan to protect her by confronting or eliminating Abraxas. Similarly, Lucius wants Narcissa to acknowledge the Dark Lord. Power and the social order are dominant. Are the men correct? Would they be able to neither have nor help Nagini and Narcissa if they did not first secure their place in the social order?
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much for your thoughtful feedback--truly appreciate it! Yes, in the world of this story, power and social order are dominant; without securing one's place in the present social order, Severus' power, his lacking social order power, at this point in his life, leaves him helpless to act effectively--how his impulses or wishes would otherwise act... thus, perhaps, motivating him to attain social power at any cost (blindly, being still a youth) in order to be more effective, and have the so-called freedom to take matters into his own hands...At this point, the futility of confronting or attempting to eliminate Abraxas would not be wise... It's one thing to see the signs of domestic abuse and another to act upon it immediately on the behalf of someone he has just become acquainted with in the rigid perimeters of his world. Lucius is his father's son... and all the cliches that go with 'the apple not falling far from the tree', etc. Again, thank you!
Response from MHaydn (Reviewer)
You are correct. The review was too focused on the similarities of Nagina and Narcissa, and it sounded too harsh. Even in more normal circumstances, a well-intentioned intervention can cause more harm than good.
The chapter presents the Malfoys as cold, calculating, and treacherous, but they are not caricatures. Their motivation is power: personal, family, class. Abraxas is one who is too extreme or too inflexible - in some ways a tragic figure. Nagini's mother suggests he is goaded by fear. Perhaps his behavior can be explained by the absence of the Midas stone, which would bring part of the story full circle. Lucius suggests using a display of understanding out of a mix of compassion and strategy. He is so eager to please his father, however, that he presses Nagini too hard and she becomes suspicious and demands a trade of information instead of freely giving it - a price for his mistake.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
More will come out a bit later about Abraxas and the crux of the matter, way back when, between him, his sister and Riddle. And yes, power is meant to be their driving force; I still wanted Lucius to be 'in process' of becoming 'a slippery' agent, not yet as polished as the adult canon, yet, but he learns/he'll learn quickly from his mistakes... Thank you for continuing to read this and the insightful feedback, affirming what is coming across--truly appreciate it!
This chapter brings out the cruelty of the young who are still finding their way and the friendship-rivalry between Severus and Regulus And, of course, the ambivalent feelings of Severus, Regulus, Lucius, and Nagini. This is contrasted with the attitude of Abraxas who could have had a powerful ally in Nagini if he had been more flexible. Perhaps ambivalence isn't all bad. It was quite a bit to pack into one chapter.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you for continuing to read and the feedback! Yes, I wanted to touch upon the seeds of cruelty manifested in earlier forms in them, and try to convey the different kinds of ambivalence they are each feeling at this time in their lives, now being forced to respond to people/things they haven't before. Abraxas is quite rigid and decisive, hardened by the past and resolute on how he wants/demands his world to be for the future. Thank you again!
An impressive chapter. Good portraits done in a subtle manner - both characters and relationships. Nagini still immature and impulsive.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you for the read and the feedback! I was trying to set up the Slytherins and their very 'mature', polished and ordered world that Nagini has been plunged into versus her disordered, unpolished and impulsive nature and background... Thank you again for the specific feedback, truly appreciate it!
Continued, unrelenting portrait of the Malfoys.
There is some inner core of Nagini that that affects even Abraxas.
Not certain about Hagrid's comment on Nagini just being let out since I though she had already spent the autumn at school.
The Malfoys gaining their wealth by a special, magical device fits canon where special, magical devices are important. It also portrays the Malfoys to not be strategic planners since an ancient house of long-lived individuals could gradually accumulate enormous wealth.
There could be more discussion of the accusations against Nagini since it might have been self defense, but self defense not tempered by the self control that the Malfoys appear to lack.
(Still not my type of story, but I can rate it on the basis of imagination and unfolding narrative.)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much for reading and the specific feedback! You've given me a lot to think about, and how I can clean up or connect more of the narrative logically in Hagrid's comments and other parts; some points I had purposefully left convoluted--lol!--such as more about Nagini's defense, etc., but other points are just sloppy narrative. More clarity will come in the next few chapters about her schooling, about her being in Durmstrang in the autumn-- sorry that the scarceness of this narrative has been left out here, but it'll be detailed in a later chapter... Thank you again for your precious time and patience, and generous rating--it's wonderful to get constructive feedback about such a roughly constructed storyline--I deeply appreciate your input!
Severus does not believe that living well is the best revenge, but for some reason, when confronted with retribution against Nagini for her past wrongs (according to the Malfoys), he is uncomfortable. Perhaps he likes revenge in the abstract, but the reality of it repels him. This is canon Severus where he offers insults and injustice, but protects the students from any real danger. Neither Severus or Regulus approve of the Malfoys. Good portrayal of Malfoy arrogance.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Yes, I wanted to capture some level of insecurity and confusion in Severus at this earlier point in his life... before he becomes the full, specific resolved character we experience in adult canon... I felt the need of retribution is playing an influence in him on some levels, abstractly, and the notion of revenge is what has been and will be an influence on him, but yes, the reality is always something different... Severus' duality on so-many levels is something I wanted to explore... I was always profoundly struck by the inherent ethical choices within Severus and Regulus that differed (revealed finally in DH) from the others in Voldemort's followers, etc. Thank you again for your generous feedback.
The narrative begins in-the-middle with a dramatic scene and proceeds to offer some explanation of current events and to suggest underlying motives. (This is not my type of story, but I must rate it as a literary effort.)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Oh goodness,
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you for your kindness of giving this a read and leaving feedback! I truly appreciate it. However, as if you can't already tell--lol!-- this was my very first, ever, fledgling attempt at writing fanfiction--I had just discovered the wild wayward goings-on and wonderful Potter verse and fandom universe, and it was started and written at an unusually strange time of my life, etc., etc. (further excuses elaborating on exploratory pulp fiction thingys, etc.) It took a very long time to discover one-shots and drabbles in this universe, which I so much enjoy now. So please, especially knowing that it is not your type of story, and it will only get worse in this and other aspects, please don't feel the need to read on--of course, I'm gobsmacked to have a writer of your calibre read and make time to constructively leave feedback, but it may be too painful an experience for you--and I'd much rather your energy go to your own writing and more posting as soon as possible!Again, regardless, thank you for your kindness & consideration with this newbie's noodling(s).
So instead of a lovely outing to Hogsmeade, it's detention with the Gryffindorks for Sev and Nagini? Those Slytherins are a tough bunch to be around, especially when the crazy one is among them. You have Bellatrix spot on- just the right amount of madness combined with malevolence, and her dialogue is perfect - "Miss hoity-toity Malfoy" made me laugh out loud. Poor Nagini just can't find her place -not quite a Ravenclaw and uneasy amongst the Slytherins (well most of them ;)) Looking forward to reading how detention works out. 
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Gryffindorks? ROFL--Brilliant! May I use it? So happy that the mad one is coming across as intended and tickled that the words I'm forcing her to say work for you--only Bella can get away with some of this stuff--lol! Yes, I think Nag and Sev need a House of their own, preferably far, far away from it all, although an evening at the ol' Hog's Head would have been a nice outing, even temporarily--damn Gryffindorks
Thank you so much for continuing to read this and your incredible support... It helps me push on and try to finish this--to get to the crux of it all and then the denouement--your generous feedback is so very much appreciated, dearest
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
! Can't wait for your latest SS/HG--still squeeing!xx
Response from hexgirl (Reviewer)
Of course you can use it - I'd l;ike to claim it for my very own, but alas, I stole it from someone with wit :)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Gryffindorks? ROFL--Brilliant! May I use it? So happy that the mad one is coming across as intended and tickled that the words I'm forcing her to say work for you--only Bella can get away with some of this stuff--lol! Yes, I think Nag and Sev need a House of their own, preferably far, far away from it all, although an evening at the ol' Hog's Head would have been a nice outing, even temporarily--damn Gryffindorks Thank you so much for continuing to read this and your incredible support... It helps me push on and try to finish this--to get to the crux of it all and then the denouement--your generous feedback is so very much appreciated, dearest
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
! Can't wait for your latest SS/HG--still squeeing!xx
Response from hexgirl (Reviewer)
Of course you can use it - I'd l;ike to claim it for my very own, but alas, I stole it from someone with wit :)
Great characterisation of the Marauders in this chapter, and I loved Snape's impudent request that Potter kneel down and kiss his toes. I'd happily kiss any body part he offered me... Ahem... You conveyed blistering, crackling tension between Snape and his enemies - well done! The scene in the Ravenclaw Tower stairwell provided a wonderful contrast, and Snape's "Brilliant..." declaration was a lovely intimate and adolescent moment which made me smile. No doubt that Nagini's universe has been forever changed by this encounter. Lovely work! 
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much--so glad you liked Snape's impudent request and that the Marauder's scene came across as intended:-) About the 'Brilliant' reply moment - LOL! - just wanted a second of Severus being 'human' and like any other adolescent before things change further for them; Yup! Nagini's universe has definitely changed--thank you again for continuing to support my slow and sporadic Muse *hugs*
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Thank you so much--so glad you liked Snape's impudent request and that the Marauder's scene came across as intended:-) About the 'Brilliant' reply moment - LOL! - just wanted a second of Severus being 'human' and like any other adolescent before things change further for them; Yup! Nagini's universe has definitely changed--thank you again for continuing to support my slow and sporadic Muse *hugs*
Oh, I love this chapter. Nagini and Severus' seductive hidey-hole was such a tease Lol! I was ready to scream at those damn Marauders for interupting. But it only added to the tension and made their eventual getting together all the more sensual, and oh was it worth the wait.I loved it all... oh but his baritone voice healing her arm *swoon*- now that's an image I'll remember for a while. I will be waiting with baited breath for the next chapter.
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
I know it's on Wendy's top 25 things not-to-do list, but... again, what's a spurned Severus to do when sweet solace is offered in the nooks and crannies of Hogwarts? - LOL! I'm so glad you liked it--had to put in his voice:-) and wanted the image of another kind of intimacy between them, with the healing of her arm by him, before it progressed to something else
Hexgirl, thank you so much for your continued support for my slow and sporadic Muse *hugs*
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
I know it's on Wendy's top 25 things not-to-do list, but... again, what's a spurned Severus to do when sweet solace is offered in the nooks and crannies of Hogwarts? - LOL! I'm so glad you liked it--had to put in his voice:-) and wanted the image of another kind of intimacy between them, with the healing of her arm by him, before it progressed to something else Hexgirl, thank you so much for your continued support for my slow and sporadic Muse *hugs*
More sweet solace please. Pretty please with a cherry on top!That was so sensual. I love the way you took us into Snape's mind and made us privy to all that he was aware of: Nagini's physical response to him, her embarasment and obvious feelings of attraction. I've said it before and I'll say it again, 'What is a spurned wizard to do?'And about that spurning: Ms Evans is more than a little insensitive here, yet I truly believe that canon Lily did not think him capable of love or devotion... well HE showed HER. Pity it was too late.The scene with Snape and Lily sems like a very likely encounter; it could almost be a missing scene. Of course Snape, being Snape focuses his hatred onto James not Lily as if SHE has been Imperiused by the big bad toe-rag. And trust the Marauders to be the instigators of snoggus interutptus. GET EM, SEV!!
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Dearest
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you so much for the lovely, provoking feedback-- I agree with you regarding canon Lily; she had her perceptions and needs and chose Potter to fulfil them, leaving Severus to his fate; both quite flawed characters and so very human:-) I just wanted to touch on another rejection scenario; however, my pov is that Sev always picked himself up, he'd learned early on to be his own man regardless of pain and rejection, a man of steel will and determination rather than an utter basket case, however, again, very human with needs and baggage of his own and yes, *deeply sentimental* underneath the layered facade;-)I could go on and on about what Lily meant and represented to Sev, like the rest of fandom - haha! - but JKR did it best, of course,--poor Snape... no mercy for him... but thankfully we are allowed to play and write fandom about him!So, 'what is a spurned wizard to do?''snoggus interutptus' - ROFL! Yea, Sev, GET EM!!! I realise I'm doing all of the 'don't dos' (I think it was on Wendy's no-no list, but I'm having too much fun, couldn't resist having my OC snog Sev in Hogwarts corridors: thanks for forgiving me!xxx)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Dearest
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you so much for the lovely, provoking feedback-- I agree with you regarding canon Lily; she had her perceptions and needs and chose Potter to fulfil them, leaving Severus to his fate; both quite flawed characters and so very human:-) I just wanted to touch on another rejection scenario; however, my pov is that Sev always picked himself up, he'd learned early on to be his own man regardless of pain and rejection, a man of steel will and determination rather than an utter basket case, however, again, very human with needs and baggage of his own and yes, *deeply sentimental* underneath the layered facade;-)I could go on and on about what Lily meant and represented to Sev, like the rest of fandom - haha! - but JKR did it best, of course,--poor Snape... no mercy for him... but thankfully we are allowed to play and write fandom about him!So, 'what is a spurned wizard to do?''snoggus interutptus' - ROFL! Yea, Sev, GET EM!!! I realise I'm doing all of the 'don't dos' (I think it was on Wendy's no-no list, but I'm having too much fun, couldn't resist having my OC snog Sev in Hogwarts corridors: thanks for forgiving me!xxx)
*click* *Click* *CLICK* What? No more? *taps fingers* Pot, meet kettle. :P
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
'Pot, meet kettle.'--Hey, sweetie, I tagged you first - lol! Seriously, I'm in the middle of my dental problems/saga in RL, but will try to get the next chapter shaped up enough for a beta soon-- thank you so much for the clicks and finger tapping-- the best nudging there is!
Response from sunny33 (Reviewer)
OK, mine's done, just needs a final tweak and the beta. And yours...?
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
um... in a jumbled process of being-- the tweak and beta is the light at the end of the tunnel, far, far away-ish... *hiding and distracted by Xenophilius*--will get back to Sev asap... thanks for the double-whammy nudge xxx
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
'Pot, meet kettle.'--Hey, sweetie, I tagged you first - lol! Seriously, I'm in the middle of my dental problems/saga in RL, but will try to get the next chapter shaped up enough for a beta soon-- thank you so much for the clicks and finger tapping-- the best nudging there is!
Response from sunny33 (Reviewer)
OK, mine's done, just needs a final tweak and the beta. And yours...?
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
um... in a jumbled process of being-- the tweak and beta is the light at the end of the tunnel, far, far away-ish... *hiding and distracted by Xenophilius*--will get back to Sev asap... thanks for the double-whammy nudge xxx
I hope Sev really can cope with whatever Bella has up her sleeve. :0
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Me too!:O Bella never does anything without ulterior motives, and Severus may have experienced a lot of things, but this might be more than he could possibly imagine at this point in his life... Thank you so much for the read & feedback!:-)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Me too!:O Bella never does anything without ulterior motives, and Severus may have experienced a lot of things, but this might be more than he could possibly imagine at this point in his life... Thank you so much for the read & feedback!:-)
Sybill is flaky but hilarious. :)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Gotta' give Sybill a little love, don't we? She just can't help herself sometimes it seems - lol! Thank you for reading and the feedback -- realy appreciate it! :-)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Gotta' give Sybill a little love, don't we? She just can't help herself sometimes it seems - lol! Thank you for reading and the feedback -- realy appreciate it! :-)
Marcus is pretty creepy, but in his own way may serve to protect Nagini. :)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Yeah, the pompous prat might be good for something... hmmm... Thank you so much for the read and the feedback, sunny! Really appreciate it!
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Yeah, the pompous prat might be good for something... hmmm... Thank you so much for the read and the feedback, sunny! Really appreciate it!
Lovely to see an update on this story 
The scene between Severus and Lily in the library was beautifully choreographed and utterly heartbreaking. I can just imagine such a conversation taking place as a result of his bereavement, but of course Lily managed to pour salt in the wound and give it a rub for good measure. Poor Severus, so blind to the consequences of his decisions and unable to comprehend the error of his ways.I also enjoyed the moments outside the hospital wing with Nagini, despite the rude interruption. Looking forward to finding out who throws the first hex!
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Oh,
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you for reading and the lovely, detailed feedback--really appreciate it! As time goes on, it just seems to me that, regardless, Lily would've kept to her decisions of rejecting him, and yet, Severus would've also kept his projected wish of Lily, how he wished/wishes her to be, and the excuses he'd make for her behaviour/rejection in his mind, regardless of how she treated him or what she told him... same old story, so sad... They were rudely interrupted, weren't they? Something will have to be done about that! Yes, I also am looking forward to the first hexes beng thrown-hehe! Thank you so much, again!
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Oh,
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you for reading and the lovely, detailed feedback--really appreciate it! As time goes on, it just seems to me that, regardless, Lily would've kept to her decisions of rejecting him, and yet, Severus would've also kept his projected wish of Lily, how he wished/wishes her to be, and the excuses he'd make for her behaviour/rejection in his mind, regardless of how she treated him or what she told him... same old story, so sad... They were rudely interrupted, weren't they? Something will have to be done about that! Yes, I also am looking forward to the first hexes beng thrown-hehe! Thank you so much, again!
OOOh! nag! VERY hot chapter. Absolutely brilliantly written, full of evocative imagery. Snapes, disappointment and bitterness over Lily and his carnal lust and inability to resist Bella was tangible. I loved this line:"But, like a sinister dream of dark yearning, Bellatrix stood before him." WOW!Then the close with the description of Nagini's sexual fantasies was equally well done because of the contrast between the darkness of Snape and Bella's act and the almost innocence of Nagini's because it was the realisation of genuine feelings of affection towards our hero. Wonderful chapter my dear!
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Hexgirl, thank you so much for the lovely, specific feedback - truly appreciate it! Sorry Sev's Slytherin, human side was depicted - he just wasn't in the mood to back down from the wench - and definitely man enough to take her on - LOL! Thank you for the feedback regarding Nagini's sexual awakenings mixed with her awakening feelings for Sev - had to start somewhere - lol! Again, thank you for your support on all levels! xxx
I hope it won't be detrimental to Nagini that she's been put in Ravenclaw instead of Slytherin
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
Response from nagandsev (Author of A Nagini and Severus Tale)
, thank you so much for the read and review! Really appreciate the feedback! The Slytherin family members will definitely be irked by this, as well as a few of their cohorts, but there's one Slytherin that's discreetly 'got her back' ;-) Thanks, again!