Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Lucius came up to Hermione after class the next day. He looked a bit self conscious. Hermione thought this was a good look for him.

"Um, I'm sorry about my reaction the other day," he told her.

Hermione smiled at him, although she would have rather hexed him into the wall.

"It's okay. I know purebloods have a problem with Muggle-borns. I hope I can change your attitude."

He scoffed at her.

She scowled at him.

He caught his breath. "I'm sorry."

"Mr. Malfoy, I appreciate your trying." She smiled genuinely as she said it.

"It's just that, all of my life I have heard of the inferiority of Muggle-borns," he stated.

"Does that statement ring true in Lily Evans?" Hermione asked.

Lucius thought long and hard about that. "She is actually a talented witch. I suppose it doesn't."

"You will find that I also am a talented witch, both with my mind and with a wand."

He scoffed at her. "No one has beaten me in dueling in Defense class, ever!" he cried.

Hermione regarded him thoughtfully. "Is that a challenge, Mr. Malfoy?"

Lucius sneered at her. "If you're brave enough to take it."

She laughed at that remark. "When are you free, Mr. Malfoy?"

"Right now," he responded.

Severus had been in the back of the room, hanging back at Lucius' request. Lucius knew that Hermione and Severus were friendly and wanted someone's help if the witch wasn't going to forgive easily.

"I wouldn't mind seeing that," Severus spoke up.

The other two looked over at him. Hermione stood.

"Come on. We'll go to the Room of Requirement."

She quickly left the classroom, followed by Lucius and Severus. They hurried to the Room of Requirement, and Hermione thought about what she wanted. When she opened the door, a room similar to the one they had used for DA meetings met her gaze.

"Perfect," she said.

They got ready. Knowing Draco, she was prepared for Lucius' early strike. She shielded it and cried, "Expelliarmus!"

Lucius' wand flew into her hand.

"That was too easy, Mr. Malfoy. I expected more from a mighty pureblood," she taunted, tossing him his wand back. She heard Severus snigger in the corner.

Lucius was enraged. He snapped his wand at her and threw a curse. Hermione blocked it easily. He was ready for her curse though, and the sparring began in earnest. They fought for a while, no one able to get the upper hand. He fought dirtily. It was no wonder he was undefeated in Defense class. But she was Hermione Granger, war hero and member of not only the Order of the Phoenix, but of the Golden Trio. There would be no defeat for her today. With a loud cry, she sent Lucius crashing into the padded wall. She raced over to him and stuck her wand in his cheek.

"Do you concede that I am a better duelist than you, Mr. Malfoy?"

"Yes," he groaned in pain.

"Do you also concede that you may be mistaken about what you know about Mudbloods?" she said pointedly, using his own terminology against him.

Severus winced at her remark, but Lucius narrowed his eyes at her.

"I may be convinced in time that my suppositions are erroneous," he admitted slyly.

"If you're trying to make me feel stupid with your large words," Hermione countered, "you need not bother. I read the dictionary in my spare time. Muggle-born witches and wizards are not dullards."

Severus laughed, earning a scowl from Lucius. Hermione let up and extended her hand to help Lucius up. He stood up proudly and removed his hand from hers.

"Good duel, Mr. Malfoy. You have some nasty tricks up your sleeve. I can see how you would be cocky about your skills. If you ever want to learn how to duel honestly, I'd be happy to instruct you."

Before she knew anything, Lucius had closed the gap between them and his mouth was on hers, kissing her wildly. She pushed him away roughly.

"I thought we discussed this aspect of our friendship," she said haughtily.

He just smirked at her and left the room. Hermione wiped her mouth and grimaced.

"Yuck!" she exclaimed. "That was disgusting. I feel like I was just kissed by a drooling hyena."

She glanced over and saw a smirk on Severus face.

"Just what's so funny, Mr. Snape?" she demanded.

"You defeated him on every level. You killed him at the duel, proved that you were just as smart as he is, and then rejected his come on. Professor Granger, you're my hero."

Hermione laughed so hard she cried.

oooOOOooo

Hermione walked along the halls, headed back to her classroom after lunch. She was among a throng of students and quietly listened to their conversations, smiling to herself now and again about something someone would say. Some of the younger students were quite clueless about the world around them. She knew that their innocence would disappear eventually. She enjoyed it while she could. She broke from the crowd of students, turning the corner into a mostly deserted hallway, and stopped in her tracks. Anger filled her face.

Severus had been backed against the wall by none other than James Potter and Sirius Black. His wand lay discarded on the ground beside him. They were taunting him, their wands pointed. He looked at them angrily, sneering at them, unable to defend himself.

"Snivellus, you need to learn respect. You shouldn't talk that way to someone so much smarter than you," Sirius Black commented.

James chortled. "Yeah, Snivellus. Learn your place." He lifted his wand to throw a spell at Severus, but Hermione's hand pulled his down.

"Just what do you think you're doing, Mr. Potter?" she exclaimed in anger as she released James' hand.

"Professor Granger, um..." James eloquently said.

"Mr. Potter, Mr. Black, you know the rules about magic in this school. It is not to be used against other students unless it is in a classroom environment, under the supervision of a teacher. How old are you two anyway?" she asked furiously.

Sirius and James looked down at the floor and mumbled that they were seventeen.

"You both act more like you were seven. As you know, the minimum age for students in this school is eleven." She let her implication sink in. "Fifty points each from Gryffindor and detention for the next week with Mr. Filch for the both of you. If I ever catch actions like this directed at anyone again, gentlemen, you will be expelled from this school before you can say Dumbledore. Do I make myself clear?"

They nodded.

"Now get out of my sight before I take away more house points!" she demanded.

They turned and scurried away. Hermione turned to Severus, who was staring at the floor, looking extremely embarrassed. Hermione put a hand on his arm.

"Are you alright?" she asked gently.

Severus beat down the desire to yell and just nodded his head.

"They're stupid and jealous of your abilities, Severus. Don't let them bother you."

Severus didn't reply. Hermione squeezed his arm.

"They're idiots, nothing but cowards, having to attack you in groups," she huffed. "They knew if they took you on alone, you'd destroy them. Don't give them any mind."

Severus glanced up at her. "Why do you care?" he asked simply.

Hermione regarded him for a moment. "I care because I hate seeing my friends in pain, that's why."

She released his arm. "I'll see you tonight," she said as she went on her way to her classroom.

She didn't see Severus stare after her, waiting until she disappeared from sight before he picked up his wand and went on his way to his next class. He didn't care if he was late; he couldn't stop watching her. He had thought she had just been humoring him when she had said she was his friend, but her actions today had said much more than that. She truly was his friend, his first real friend in a while. He wasn't sure why that fact made him feel so good inside; he didn't care if he had friends or not. The altercation with Potter and Black fell away from his mind as he made his way down the hall. He thought of his new friend and his steps became lighter.

oooOOOooo

Severus and Hermione sat on the Ravenclaw sofa. Neither of them had been in this particular common room, but they were quite impressed. It was large and had a beautiful statue of Rowena Ravenclaw in the center of it. Hermione remembered Harry telling her about it. She was still admiring the statue when Severus cleared his throat.

She looked over at him. He looked very nervous.

"Have you thought much about what I told you last night?" she asked him.

He sighed. "I've thought about it a great deal, Professor Granger," he said.

Hermione frowned. "Let's just go by first names when we're in this room, okay? After all, we're friends, right?"

Severus nodded pensively. "You said I would regret my decision. What happens?"

Hermione sighed and put her legs up on the sofa. It was long enough that Severus still had plenty of space to stretch out himself if he wanted to. He preferred to sit still as a stone with his arms crossed in front of him facing Hermione. He stared expectantly at her as she gathered her thoughts.

Hermione looked at him evenly. "Not long after you join the ranks of the Death Eaters, you will hear a prophecy being told to Dumbledore. You will immediately go and tell Voldemort about it. The prophecy speaks of a child who is to be born at the end of the seventh month, who will defeat the 'Dark Lord.' Voldemort is worried, of course, and researches all of the women who are pregnant at the time. He finds two women who are due to give birth that coming July. One of them is Lily Potter. Voldemort decides that she must be the one bearing the child of the prophecy."

Severus turned deathly pale. He looked like he was going to be sick right there.

"Realizing that you have put Lily in grave danger, you plead to Voldemort for her life, but you know him and do not believe that he will spare it. You decide to go to Dumbledore. You tell him of Voldemort's plan to kill the Potters and beg him to protect them. He does. In return for the favor you agree to be his spy among the Death Eaters."

Severus' face registered shock at his sudden turn from the Dark Lord.

Hermione continued, "He makes the Potter house unplottable, and they set up wards to protect the home. Unfortunately, James Potter trusts the wrong person. The man he chooses to be secret keeper eventually rats him out to Voldemort. By this time, Lily has had her baby and he is one year old. Finally, one night, Voldemort strikes, cutting down James Potter first, who has tried to hold him downstairs to give Lily a chance to escape with Harry. He couldn't give her enough time. Voldemort enters the nursery, where Lily stands over Harry, protecting him."

Tears were now running down Severus' face, and Hermione was tearing up as well.

"He kills Lily first, but does not realize that her love for Harry has given the baby magical protection. He sends the killing curse to Harry, but it shoots away from him and hits Voldemort instead. Voldemort disappears. Everyone assumes he is dead, except Dumbledore. He asks you to protect Harry from Voldemort's imminent return, to keep him alive so he can fulfill the prophecy. You agree to do it for Lily, for the guilt you feel at being the one who brought the prophecy to Voldemort."

Severus put his head in his hands and sobbed in grief. Hermione got up and moved next to him, putting an arm comfortingly around his shoulders as his body was wracked with sobs.

"No, no," he murmured over and over again. His deep voice was filled with agony.

Hermione pulled him closer and finished the tale.

"Ten years later, Harry came to Hogwarts. Voldemort had found a way to return in spirit by then, and Harry, unbeknownst to him, was protected by you. You saved his life several times over the years. In his fourth year, Voldemort found a way to reclaim his body. He began to amass his Death Eaters, and you resumed your work officially as a spy for the Order of the Phoenix. You participated in raids and tortured and killed Muggles so you could keep your cover. I have seen you when you returned from those raids, Severus. You were always sullen and haunted, and I know you had terrible nightmares about the things you had to do while following Voldemort.

"The next two years were spent by Harry, our friend Ron, and me hunting for Horcruxes. Voldemort had made seven of them to keep his soul alive. That's how he survived the original attack on Harry. You secretly helped Harry when you could, but by that time you had gone deep undercover in Voldemort's group. Everyone thought you had betrayed the Order, but you hadn't. You just wanted it to look like that so Voldemort would trust you. Finally Harry was able to defeat Voldemort. During that battle you were wounded by Voldemort's giant snake Nagini, who was the last Horcrux. You nearly died, but thanks to my copious supply of dittany that I poured over your wounds when we found you, and Madam Pomfrey and her supply of Phoenix tears, you were healed and survived. The truth came out about your double spy work, and you received an Order of Merlin for your work behind enemy lines. Since then, you have taught at Hogwarts like you always did."

"I'm not really sure what you would have been like had you never become a Death Eater or heard that prophecy, but I can tell you what you were like because of it. You pushed everyone away. You trusted no one. You had to participate in countless tortures and murders, each of which made you a bit more withdrawn. You were that mean teacher I described the other night. You were a loner. Your spy work made you distant from everyone, and many people hated you because they thought you had turned on us. You had to be especially mean to Harry because you couldn't have anyone think that you were helping him in any way.

"On the other hand, you never wavered as a spy. You endured horrid tortures by Voldemort without ever thinking of betraying us. You are by far the bravest man I have ever met, Severus."

Severus' mind was swirling, and his head felt like it was going to explode. He had killed Lily. He had destroyed his life. He was nothing, worth nothing. It was all because of some stupid tattoo that bound him to evil. How could he have been such a fool?

"I should just disappear from off the face of the Earth. It doesn't seem like I did anything but ruin people's lives from the time I got that bloody Mark." He pulled at his hair in frustration.

Hermione pulled him in towards her, keeping her arm solidly around him.

"Don't say things like that. You still have a choice Severus. None of this has happened yet. You can change the future. You don't have to take the Mark!"

"I killed her, Hermione, I killed her!"

"Severus, no, you didn't kill her. You made a mistake and told Voldemort about the prophecy; you didn't kill her. Voldemort did."

He gasped, "It's the same thing."

She looked at him, shaking in misery, and just wanted him to be alright. "No, it's very different." She pulled his head up so he was looking at her. "I'm sorry, Severus; I knew this would be awful for you, but I want you to save yourself. Stay away from Voldemort and change your fate, please!" she begged him.

He quieted and looked at her. He couldn't understand her. She brought herself close to him, even though he was a monster.

"Why do you care, Hermione?" he asked for the second time that day.

Hermione frowned. "Because I'm your friend, Severus, that's why. I have seen you in the future when you let your guard down. Deep down, you're the same young man you are now. But your life decisions have destroyed you. They have convinced you that there is no love to be found in this world and have left you bitter and jaded. My greatest hope for you is that when I return to my time, I would find much more of this Severus in the future Severus."

She pulled her arm out from around him and grasped his hands in hers.

"Please, Severus. Think about what I have told you tonight. Don't do it again. Save yourself, maybe even Lily and James, I don't know. Somehow I think Voldemort will kill them anyway, but at least you won't have any part in it. You won't live with that guilt every day of your life until it crushes your identity and makes you feel hollow and alone."

With that she rose and kissed the top of his head. She wasn't quite sure why.

"I'll see you tomorrow night, okay?"

He nodded but didn't look at her. She withdrew and left him to his dark thoughts.

Next up: Severus makes his decision.

Thanks everybody for the interest in this story. I'm glad you like it, and I appreciate any comments you have made already and any you wish to make.