Part 1 - Chapter 4 - Claudia

A/N: This is a HUGE chapter, I know, but I really didn't want to break it up into another chapter. We still have two more parts to go through! Anyway, I am VERY excited about this chapter, and I am begging and pleading with all who read: PLEASE REVIEW! I want to hear all of your feedback! Hugs and chocolate to my beta, MadBrilliant. Love ya, girl! Warning: Major Explicit Sexual Content!

***

Claudia was now in her fifth year. She was so deep into her preparation for her O.W.L.s; she had barely seen Severus more than a handful of times since their engagement. He was leaving school soon. It was February 9th: Claudia's sixteenth birthday. She watched as the morning owls came in during breakfast with the daily mail. Claudia was bombarded with cards and presents. She decided to open them in the privacy of her own room, so she shrunk them all down, transfigured her handkerchief into a tote bag and carried all of them to her room. She fished through to find what Severus had gotten her. Surely, he would have remembered her birthday.

She found a flat package and noticed his spiky, cramped handwriting. She read the card first.

My dear Claudia,

Severus

The gift was a stunning diamond and emerald necklace with matching earrings. They would go perfectly with her engagement ring. It was breathtaking! It did not slip Claudia's notice that Severus did not mention anything about love. It saddened her to be reminded again that the man she would spend her life with would never love her. How was she going to have sex with him when there was no love there for her? It angered her. At least he could lie, or pretend to love her. At least she could save face in front of her friends. Perhaps, though, after he and Lily left school and went their separate ways, he could grow to love her. Claudia knew that Lily was dating James Potter, and everyone believed they would be engaged soon.

She thought of Severus, Lily, and James. She heard about the dueling, the hexing, and the out and out battles. Black and Pettigrew had left Severus alone, but Potter and Severus would still every once in a while, go at it. She heard the rumors, and she would walk past Lily sometimes in the hall. She always had a sympathetic look for Claudia, and she didn't appreciate it. What was that, pity? There were a lot of very conflicting and angry feelings churning inside her, and she didn't know what to do with them.

***

It had been in the spring when it first happened. It had been May, one month before Severus had finished his schooling at Hogwarts and went on to his apprenticeship. Claudia had been walking with her fiancé in an isolated area outside of Hogsmeade. He had changed so much. He was taller than ever, and he had grown into his sharp features. He had a very mysterious air about him in his black robes, and his voice was very deep and commanding. He had become a man. He was no longer trying to be like Lucius. He had become his own person, and for good or bad, he was what he was. She had discovered quickly he had retained his rather prickly nature and still did not like to be questioned. He also had an acidic tongue that had reduced her to tears more than once on occasion. Iris had told her she must toughen up if she was to be the consort Severus deserved! So, she had made up her mind to obey him unquestioningly and defer to his wishes at all times.

When they had reached a suitable, isolated area, he had informed her curtly of his virginity and that she should not expect anything extraordinary. He had been a bit cold, refusing to look her in the eye, and she could tell he had hated admitting his virginity to her. So, without another word, he had laid her down on the floor of the woods, on top of his black cloak, and had asked her for her permission. She had said "yes." He had not been rough, but he had definitely been in it for his own gratification. She had cried softly that first time against his shirt, and he had been considerate enough to pause his movements to assure her it would never hurt again. It had ended a few seconds after that.

The subsequent times she had just watched the spring leaves above her and had focused on the sound of the birds in the trees and rustling wind...anything to distract her from the panting man on top of her. He had never taken long anyway to make much difference to her. It had continued to become just a two-minute inconvenience that proved to be indeed painless after that first time.

It continued thusly for the remainder of the summer. She stayed at Malfoy Manor so she could be available to Severus whenever he required her. A couple times a week, they would meet and she would say "yes." As time went by, it got better, but he still had yet to touch her mind and soul, and because of that she never received the pleasure she knew that she should be experiencing.

Then suddenly it got much better. The fall of her sixth year, he had come into the school secretly to surprise her, and she found herself being taken up against a wall in an empty classroom. He was aware she was not responding to him. For the first time, he slowly uncovered her and took his time to focus on her. It was dark, and the guttural sounds that escaped his lips as he nipped and lapped at her skin almost sent her over the edge. She had to admit afterwards to herself that he had worked his arse off trying to get a response from her, but she fought with every ounce of resolve in her not to respond to him.

***

Before Claudia knew it, she was over half way through her sixth year and was deep in her training to take her place as Lady Slytherin. She knew from observing and attending to the current Lady, Hortense Ogilvy, that it was a very important position that demanded much time and patience. Lady Slytherin would be required to handle any delicate problems of all the Slytherin girls. She would, in fact, be a mother figure. She would be required to know all the answers, be wise in her advice, and also demand a quiet reverence from every Slytherin male. Claudia knew that just by being Snape's fiancée no one would cross her. At least there was one perk to being the fiancée of Severus Snape!

One morning while reading the Daily Prophet over breakfast, Claudia read that Lily and James Potter had married. Claudia sighed a sigh of relief. There would be no way now for Lily and Severus to be together. Lily loved James, and she and her new husband were fighting against the Dark Lord. "Foolish idiot!" she thought harshly. "She's going to get herself killed if she continues to fight against the Dark Lord."

***

When Severus had left Hogwarts in June of 1978, he had taken the Dark Mark and had begun his training as a Death Eater. When the fall had arrived, he had become the Dark Lord's Potion maker in addition to his apprenticeship. Because of this, they almost never saw one another. Only once or twice a month would they meet and have sex.

On her seventeenth birthday, though, he surprised her with a visit, an emerald and diamond bracelet, and a romp in the broom closet at Hogwarts. This time, he was more menacing and fierce in his ardor. He was very skilled in his carnal expertise. At first, Claudia wondered where he had gained his knowledge. He roughly stripped off her clothes from the waist up and devoured her breasts. It was pure torture to not respond when he was so good at what he did! So, as she managed to pretend nothing was happening, he would whisper in her ear all the things he knew. He told her he knew she was fighting him and resisting giving into her pleasure. His voice was deep and silky now, and he knew how to use it to his advantage. He teased her with comments about her wetness for him and how good she felt around his fingers. He tried hard to seduce her body and make it his in the most intimate way, and she had to force herself to resist responding to his touch. He finally knelt down, hooked one leg over his shoulder, and began to lap and suck on her most sensitive areas. She squirmed and bit her lip until she thought she would cry if she did not find release, but she held her ground and thwarted him at every turn.

That signaled the first of many similar liaisons between the couple. Claudia knew each time Severus would eventually stop his ministrations and resign himself to the fact she would not relent, and then her punishment would begin as he would thrust himself into her as hard as he could, over and over, growling filthy, dirty things in her ear. She actually began to enjoy that wild, unleashed part of him more than anything else. After he came, he required her each time to taste a sample of his emission that ran down her thighs. Claudia knew he did it to try and humiliate her for refusing to orgasm, but she did not show any emotion about it. She just did as she was told. Then, later in the privacy of her bed or the bathroom, she would replay how his thrusting cock had felt and how his growling perverted words had sounded so good as she gave herself relief.

Now that she was seventeen, Severus made concerted efforts to bed her more often. After all, she was of age in the Wizarding world. But after a while, she realized that all her successes to thwart him in bed were becoming more and more difficult, as he took it as his mission to break her and make her want him. She was determined she would never allow a man who loved another woman force her to surrender to him. She fought hard to reject the demands her body screamed at her for release. Whenever things became too heated, she would implement some of the tried and true tactics she learned from Iris, Narcissa, and Bellatrix, and within minutes, he would be hollering out his own orgasm, thus creating her own escape. And though he was sated, the look of disgust in his face was almost painful enough to make her regret keeping him at an arm's length. As soon as she thought it safe to leave his bed, he would yank her back to him and start all over again, teasing and drawing her closer to the edge. She soon learned to disentangle herself from him after he was weak from his release and escape to her room where she could be free to relieve herself with no limitations on her enjoyment...privately. It was her own quiet, secret rebellion that no one would punish her for. Besides, it wasn't as if she was required to climax in order to bear her husband an heir!

***

Towards the end of her seventh year, she met again with Severus. Claudia could not believe it now had been over two years since they started having sex. He took her into his bedroom at Malfoy Manor and began to undress her. He was always very vocal in bed for a man who was so quiet in life outside of the bedroom. As she allowed him to take off her clothes, he stopped and looked at her face.

"Claudia, please, I know I'm not the handsome man you had hoped to marry, but I try so hard to get you to engage with me. But you are so detached. What can I do?" he pleaded.

She looked at him incredulously. "You don't get it. All this time and you still don't get it?"

"Get what, Claudia?" he asked impatiently.

"Lily Potter."

His eyes snapped and he grabbed her arm. "Don't speak of her, Claudia!" he said softly, but with anger behind that softness.

Claudia pushed him away from her. "What do you expect? That I will just get on with it and give you all of me when you give me nothing of yourself that truly means something? Giving me your orgasms means nothing to me if I don't have your love. And releasing orgasms to you would be stripping me of the last vestige of self-respect I have. This is my self-preservation. You save your heart and your love for her. And what about me? What do I get? I get to satisfy your urges. That makes me a whore because I lay down for it, and it provides my family their standing with the Dark Lord. So I am your whore. But a whore isn't required to enjoy it, Severus."

She readjusted her robes and prepared to leave. Severus stopped her. His hands encircled her arms and he pressed her back into him, his lips kissed her hair.

"Please, please, Claudia. Does my respect, my affection for you mean nothing? You are not a whore. I do not come to you just to get off. I truly and deeply care for you. Otherwise, why would I work so goddamn hard at pleasuring you? You are a brilliant witch. I adore your mind and spirit. I enjoy talking with you, and you are so desirable. I do want you to know I respect you more than any woman."

"More than Lily?"

He whipped her around and faced her angrily.

"Don't, Claudia. Look, I'm trying here. Please let's try. Perhaps if enough time goes by, we can learn to love each other. But I am willing to try. And I want to please you as much as you please me." His hand caressed her cheek.

"Claudia, you are so beautiful in your body and mind. Please, stay and let me pleasure you."

Claudia was deeply touched. "Oh, Severus. You truly meant what you said?" She looked up at him with so much hope it made him cringe inside.

"Yes."

"Okay."

She undressed and stood naked before him. He was overcome with desire for her. He did truly care for her, although he did lie to her. He would never try to love her. Lily would be the only woman he would ever love. But Claudia was a flesh and blood woman with whom he could share his baser nature and fulfill his immediate needs. He would never have Lily; she was gone from his life forever, but Claudia was a very beautiful witch, and he did enjoy losing himself in her body. He hurriedly stripped off his clothes and climbed on top of her. She was so appealing and lovely. He loved her breasts; they were amazingly firm and perfectly round with beautiful rosy nipples. He loved to tease and nip at them until they were red and swollen. He knew she enjoyed it as well, for within minutes of his sucking and swirling each nipple into hard peaks, she was dripping wet, and he could feel her aching for him to fill her. He got on his knees and pushed her thighs apart, pressing down on her inner thighs to spread her further. He watched himself enter her, and he pumped in and out of her glistening core, desperate for her to respond to him. He raked his eyes over her beautiful body; her red, swollen breasts were moving in time with his thrusts as she clutched the bars of the headboard behind her. Claudia was amazed and shocked by the lengths he went to so she would find release. She decided to let her guard down and stop fighting her desire for him. He had a raw sexuality that was very primal. She wanted more than anything to have him bring her to climax as she did in the privacy of her own bed imagining him as she cried out her release.

She gave herself over to him and watched him pant and groan as he continued to slam into her. Once she had made that decision, she snapped and allowed her passion to wash over her. She grabbed onto her lover, her future husband, and passionately kissed him while bucking and grinding against him. She was lost in her pleasure and wantonly cried out Severus' name as he brought her to orgasm.

"Severus! Severus! Oh...God...I...love...you!"

She rode out her burst of feeling and he came quickly with her. Shouting her name "Claudia" over and over. But he never said he loved her.

Afterwards, he held her, and Claudia thought, "It is enough for now."

***

Things changed after that. She and Severus spent more time getting to know each other. She was becoming increasingly besotted with him. They took long walks around the manor whenever he could get away from his work and talked about Potions, History, Alchemy, and Magical Theory. She loved to see the surprised look on his face when she would give an answer to a question he was sure she would never understand. And intelligence was Severus' true aphrodisiac. He may salivate at the sight of her plump breasts, but a heated debate between them would find herself slammed up against a wall or thrown on to the ground, and within minutes he would have her screaming his name over and over. They spent most of the summer after her graduation making love outside in the warm sun. She reveled in making love to him, giving herself over to him, and knew he enjoyed bringing her pleasure. It was something that built up his ego. After pleasuring her nether regions, he would rise up, lips glistening with her juices and a smug look on his face. It was only fair of course; so many times she had reduced him to a puddle of writhing masculinity that could not put two words together while under her control. The mental and physical closeness they shared brought Claudia closer to the belief that he would one day utter those words: I love you.

***

She had made it a policy to never mention Lily again after that last argument just before she gave all of herself over to him. As she had neared the end of her school career in the late spring of 1980, more and more time was spent planning the wedding. They had decided to be married on Christmas day, December 25, 1980. That would make it officially four years to the day of their betrothal announcement. It had been Claudia's idea. Severus had agreed, muttering something about "romantic nonsense."

Claudia had liked the idea that she would be married in this new decade that she hoped would usher in a new life and love between her and her husband. She had also decided when she officially moved into Malfoy Manor after graduation to begin assisting Severus in the lab. Things were fine until the end of the summer when Severus became distant and angry. Claudia, being ever the voracious reader and student, devoured books on Potions, tried to ask questions, and at times corrected his work. He hated her interference, especially when she was right!

"Why must you continue to be such an insufferable know-it-all?" he snapped at her one miserable, hot August day.

She was affronted. No one had called her that in years! Sure she was bookish and enjoyed learning, but why did he have to be so cruel?

"I'm only trying to help you! I read a new article about this potion and it said..."

He slammed his hand down on the table and glared at her. "What did I tell you about books, Claudia, or should I start calling you Miss Fairfax again? You are acting like a child! A silly girl who thinks she can learn all there is to life by reading a book. Just get out!" he snarled.

"Fine!" she yelled at him and she strode out of the room, banging the door shut in her wake.

"Insufferable? He is the insufferable one...insufferable bastard, that is!" she muttered to herself.

She didn't know what was getting into Severus lately. He had become increasingly shirty the last couple of weeks. As she made her way up the stairs to his bedroom, she thought about when he had started getting strange in his temper. She had first noticed it just before she had left Hogwarts. He had been asked to go on a delicate mission for the Dark Lord, and when he had returned, the Dark Lord had been elated with Severus' work, although Severus had seemed not to be content with his newfound success.

Then, when she had come to live with him, he had been happier having her with him whenever he had wanted. The summer had been going so well, and Severus had been so attentive, but two weeks ago, at the start of August, he was snarling and vicious to everyone who came into his path. He only reserved his manners for the Dark Lord. Claudia had noted grimly after two months of having relations nearly every day, sometimes twice a day, he had not touched her in two weeks. She was growing concerned.

She stole into his room and decided to go through his things. He had many protective charms on some of the drawers, but she knew him enough now to bypass them. When she found nothing in his drawers, she paced around the room, trying to think with her Slytherin sensibilities. She looked at the bedside table. She considered it and tapped the bottom with her foot. It was hollow! Claudia got down on her hands and knees, cleared off the top and tilted the table to see if something was underneath it. She found a small box and dragged it out. She took a couple of deep breaths to get up her courage to open it. She felt sick to her stomach. It was full of odds and ends. There was a lock of red hair intertwined with black. Claudia gasped at it. She closed her eyes, still fingering the hair between her fingers. She knew it would not be good for her to continue looking but knew she must. She found pictures of Severus with Lily. And there was a clipping of the Potters' wedding announcement. There was a burn hole where James' face should have been. At the bottom of the box, she found a letter that had a "return to sender" written on it. She nervously opened it and read the letter. It was dated August 5, 1980. That was just two weeks ago! she screamed inside her head.

She continued reading the missive. It was a letter Severus had written to Lily and obviously, it had been returned to him. In the letter he had begged Lily to run off with him and leave Potter and her son behind. He had written he would always love her, and his love would never die. It didn't matter to him that she was a new mother with a son. He would give her a dozen sons to replace the one she'd leave behind. The more Claudia read, the angrier she became. She was almost at the end when the door opened, and he was standing there. When Severus saw what she had done, his face became white with rage.

"What the fuck are you doing? These are mine! MINE!" he roared.

Claudia got up off the floor with the letter and shook it in his face. "You son-of-a-bitch! You are sharing your bed with me and plotting to run off with her!"

She was blind with rage. She flung herself at him and struck him over and over on the face. "How COULD you? How could you hurt me like this? I gave you everything! You told me to trust you, to try, and you lied...you LIED!" she shrieked.

He grabbed her hands to stop her assault. "Stop this exhibition of hysteria this minute!" he hissed.

She wrenched herself from him. She was crying and falling apart. And there he stood, emotionless and unyielding. She placed a hand on her forehead; she felt it would explode. The letter was crumpled in her other hand. She continued to look at him in disbelief. How could she have been so blind and stupid! And how could he just stand there and act as if he had done nothing of significance?

She challenged him. "Why can't you just give me some show of remorse, of emotion that you are hurt or that you feel just the tiniest bit of shame? Can't you summon even that for me?"

"And what precisely would that accomplish?" he said coldly.

She screamed at him wildly. "Maybe it would help me feel a little bit better! I gave you everything I could and even that wasn't enough! You even took without my permission! You, my father, the Dark Lord have all taken my life, and I tried to play by your rules! I gave you so much...I just want something, something back for me!"

Claudia looked at him as he continued to show no emotion in his face. She tore the letter to shreds, balled it up in her fist, and threw it at him with all the rage she could muster as she screeched, "You bastard! You can't even summon the littlest bit of emotion for me. But you'll beg and scrape for a Mudblood!"

His eyes snapped and glared at her. "DON'T CALL HER THAT!" he thundered.

"Why not? You did! I hate you!" she screamed as she pounded her hands on his chest.

He grabbed her wrists and flung her from him. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself! You knew I did not love you. I never lied. What do you want, my pity? Are you going to sink that low now?" he said icily.

"I don't want your pity! I just want what is due me!" she screamed. She pushed past him, ripped open the door, and dashed down the hall. He followed her and dragged her onto the balcony out of sight.

"You will control yourself, you stupid girl! I gave you all I could give!" he spat.

"Oh, but if she'd left Potter and come to you, you'd have left me in a heartbeat!" she hollered.

He stood silently.

"ADMIT IT!' she screamed.

"What the devil is going on here!" said a thunderous voice. Claudia and Severus turned and faced a very angry Lucius Malfoy. With him stood Mulciber and Avery. The Dark Lord slithered out from behind them.

"Severus, Claudia, what pray tell is all this domestic squabbling about? We could hear you from the foyer," he said softly.

Severus glared at Claudia. She knew he wanted her to keep her mouth shut. She didn't care! This was all complete shite!

She glared at the Dark Lord, pointed an accusing finger at Snape and said, "He is in love with another woman and is trying to steal her from her husband and leave me!"

Lucius groaned as he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. Mulciber and Avery were wide-eyed and pale. Claudia realized as she glanced at the three of them that they knew! She understood it all now. They all knew about Lily and Severus. She had been played for a fool. No more. No fucking more!

The Dark Lord turned his head slightly towards Lucius' as he heard the wizard groan.

"There seems to be much deception occurring here. Severus, what do you have to say?" he asked simply, but with a glare in his eyes.

"My Lord, I care deeply for Claudia, but I do love another. However, I have no intention of abandoning Claudia, especially since we have been enjoying a physical relationship for some time now," he replied silkily.

"Coward!" she spat at him. "I found a letter dated not two weeks ago, begging her to leave her husband to run off with him, and we've been intimate for two years!"

"Severus, do you wish to leave me?" asked the Dark Lord quietly, ignoring Claudia's outburst.

"No, my Lord, I had a moment of weakness. When I discovered she had given birth to a child, I foolishly sent a letter I should not have. At any rate, I would have never left you...just Claudia." He stood there and spoke those words without so much as a glance towards her.

Claudia looked at him and gasped at the cruelty she was being shown. Am I so worthless, that he can dismiss me without so much as another thought?

The Dark Lord finally fixed his eyes upon her. "My dear, life is so fleeting. I am sure that Severus is deeply regretful and will never misuse your feelings again. However, you have promises to keep, my dear. I am counting on your union with Severus to bring more pure-bloods into this world."

Claudia thought she was going to lose her mind. Her eyes flooded with tears and her hands started to shake. She backed away from them. "None of you ever cared about me...y-you just used me! How can you face yourselves? You're all evil, evil!" she screamed at them.

She pointed accusingly at Severus. "And you are a COWARD!" she thundered.

Severus was getting agitated. He tried to interrupt, but the Dark Lord cut him off. "My dear," he began in a sickly, sweet voice. "You would do better to hold your tongue and do as you are told." His red eyes bore into hers.

She broke the contact. She would not allow her mind to be raped by him. She looked back at him, but avoided meeting his eyes. "You are a sick and twisted viper! You spout your 'pure-blood' mania when you are just a half-blood bastard whose father threw him away! Dumbledore is right. You are all evil, and I'm sick to death of all this!"

She kept backing up and away, closer to the edge. Voldemort broke the tension filled silence.

"Very well," he conceded.

"AVADA KEDAVRA! he boomed.

The green light burst from his wand and hit her directly in her chest. The force threw her over the balcony edge, and she fell backwards gracefully into the air and finally crashed on to the pavement below. The men dashed to the edge and saw her broken body. She was dead.

Severus turned to face the Dark Lord, his face pale with horror.

"I am sorely disappointed, Severus. You have much to make up for." The Dark Lord turned and exited the balcony with Mulciber and Avery in his wake. They both gave him a look of sorrow before leaving.

Severus was unable to tear his eyes off Claudia's broken body, now oozing blood from her head onto the pavement.

Lucius stood close to Severus. He was angry. "You have been a complete fool!" he spat.

He leaned into the grief-stricken man and whispered, "If he can do that to a pure-blood, what do you think he will do to your precious Mudblood?"

Severus tore his eyes from Claudia and turned his horrified face to Lucius.

"Oh, yes," he said angrily. "You would do better to get yourself under control, my friend, before you get us all killed!"

He left Severus there on the balcony, shouting to the house-elves to dispose of the body.

Severus stood there paralyzed. What have I become?

***

A/N: There is still one more chapter left in this sad tale of Claudia.