Where We Move Forward In Time.
Chapter 13 of 13
neelix'Is life not a hundred times too short for us to stifle ourselves?'
~ Friedrich Nietzsche ~
Hermione
There was a time when I really believed we would never get to this point. Severus was so stubborn, and even now I think he holds a little bit of himself back, just in case Harry does decide to leave him. I know that he won't, because he bought him a bonding ring. This is why Harriet and I are on our way to visit Ron and Luna for the evening. Harry has gone to quite a bit of effort for tonight, and part of me just wishes I could see the look on Severus' face. At least I'll get to say 'I told you so'.
I'm glad my final week at work is over. This baby seems more troublesome than Harriet ever was, keeping me awake at night with heartburn, leg cramps and awkward kicks when I least expect it. I wouldn't be surprised if he's Harry's, but that's something we will never know, unless the physical similarities are really obvious.
'I don't know why we had to come by train.' Harriet is pouting as she stares out of the window. I specifically chose an empty carriage, because she does have a lot to learn about being discreet when Muggles are present.
'You do know why. Apparating isn't good for the baby, and using the Floo makes me sick. You should get used to it. This time next week you'll be on the Hogwarts Express.'
She doesn't say anything, but in her reflection I can see her bite her lip. Her long, dark hair falls forward to hide her face, and she scuffs her trainers nervously. I take her hand and squeeze it.
'You'll have a great time, you know. Hagrid will meet you from the train, and Minerva will be at Hogwarts when you get there.'
'That's not the point. I'm a Snape, remember.'
'Yes, you are. You should be very proud of that, Harriet.'
'I am, Mum. I love Dad, but not everyone does.'
I don't know what to say. I know she's right, and she could very well be in for a hard time at school. Even if she didn't have Severus' name, there would be no hiding her heritage. She has grown tall and gangly like her father at the same age, and her colouring gives her away immediately.
'You promise I can come home when the baby is born?'
'Of course. I've already arranged it with Minerva.' I know Harriet wants something to look forward to, and her new brother is due in six weeks time. She would never forgive us if she wasn't part of it.
'And everyone is coming to the station?' She peers at me through the curtain of hair and I see the spark of hope in her eyes. She looks older than her eleven years, but she's still my baby.
'Your dad and Uncle Harry have it all planned, and of course I'll be there, too.'
'People might think it's weird, three of you coming,' she mumbles quietly.
I've been waiting for this. We have an unconventional arrangement compared to Harriet's peers, most of whom will have two parents who are married. When she was younger, she just accepted it for what it is, but now the questions have started.
'One of us could stay behind, if you want,' I say quietly. 'Who would you rather was there?'
She says nothing for a while, but I can tell she's battling with her conscience. 'I want all of you to be there.'
'Okay then. We'll all come.'
'I won't know what to say to people if they ask.'
'You could just tell them the truth, Harriet. I know it's not the same as everyone else, but it is special, isn't it?'
She smiles now. I know she loves having her Uncle Harry in the house, and she gets the best of all of us.
'Will Miranda come, too?'
'Do you want her to?'
'Well, it makes sense. Uncle Harry and dad are together, and you're with Miranda. She's still part of the family, even if she doesn't live in our house.'
'I'll ask her. I think she would love to come.'
Harriet shifts in her seat and rests her head on my shoulder. I put my arm around her and pull her close, and try not to think about having to say goodbye.
***
Harry
I can't believe I'm doing this. After five years together, Severus still keeps me guessing at times, and he might be happy with the way things are but I'm not. We have a baby on the way, and if that's not commitment I don't know what it, but I still think we need something more.
Not for the first time I wonder what will happen if he refuses me. I won't walk away, because I know that's not what he wants. He hasn't told me outright, but I know he gets scared that everything will fall apart. He becomes distant then, and I have to work hard to get him back to a place where we're equal. I wish he would just relax and enjoy it. This seems to be the only way I can convince him that I'm not going anywhere.
He's not one for sentimentality, but I've cooked the same meal we had in Dublin. I wonder if he'll notice. I light the candles with my wand and turn out the lights. The dining room at Spinner's End is small, and the candle-light casts a cosy glow. It's not as modern as the Dublin house, and most of the furniture is mis-matched and old, but I've grown to love it. It's very Severus. Appearances mean nothing to him, he prefers usefulness and function. This is about as romantic as we get, I suppose, candlelit dinners. It's ironic that I am the one trying to convince Severus of my feelings. I tell him I love him regularly. He's told me he loves me twice. Once, that first night in Dublin and that was in a round about way, and then another time three years ago, when he came home pissed from the pub, after our one and only fight. It was his fault, of course. But I can forgive him everything. That's what this is all about, really.
I knock on the door of the lab and wait for his rumbling tones to bid me enter. I open the door slowly and peek around. He's washing his hands, the sleeves of his white shirt rolled up tightly to his bony elbows, the veins of his forearms raised and blue as he flexes his muscles around soap and water. His slim fingers push the suds below his fingernails and I'm in awe of how scrupulously clean he is, always.
'Are you hungry?' I say quietly. Speaking loudly in the lab seems uncouth. He is always silent and diligent, and there is a church-like quality to the space, with the work bench the altar of his work.
He rinses his hands and takes a clean towel to dry them as he turns to me with his eyebrow arched.
'For food?' he says, teasing.
'Well, food first,' I reply with a grin. We don't often have the house to ourselves, but when we do, we make the most of the rug in front of the fire, and I know tonight will be no different. Well, perhaps a bit different.
'I'll be five minutes.' He walks over and kisses me, and I hold on to the wood of the door as my legs turn to jelly. He still does things to me, even after all this time. He always will. I know this with certainty.
I go back upstairs and pour two generous glasses of red wine, and immediately take a large gulp from my glass. I'm veering between nervous excitement and bravery, and between getting down on one knee or just putting the ring box on his plate and saying nothing. I decide on the latter, it being the least risky, and pull the warm, green velvet box from my trouser pocket, where it's been for the last two days. I sit it neatly in the centre of the green and white china plate. This dinner set once belonged to Severus' mother, and I've unearthed it from the back of the china cabinet specifically.
The oven timer buzzes merrily, and I check the beef casserole one last time before turning down the heat. I hear light footfalls on the tiled floor behind me, and as I turn, I see he's holding the box in his hand. His face is a pale mask, and I really can't tell what he's thinking.
'What is this?' he whispers.
'If you open the box, you'll see for yourself.'
'Harry...' His tone is wary with a hint of warning. Mentally, I make a plan to Floo over to Ron's if this goes tits up.
'Open it, Severus. It's not going to bite.'
He snorts at this. The last thing that bit him didn't survive the fight, and I've teased him a number of times about it. The bite mark is my favourite of all his scars, and I love the feel of it beneath my tongue, flat in some parts, wrinkled and rough in others. He opens the box but holds my gaze as he does so, then glances down quickly. I hear his sharp intake of breath, and watch as he lifts the heavy silver ring from its cosy nest. It's an antique ring, old and battered by the passage of time and its previous owners. The edges are smoothly worn, but it's simple and solid. Like him. Like us.
'Do you like it?' I already know that he does. His face has softened and the light in his eyes has gone from wary to bright. He won't cry, but I think he wants to.
'It's a Bonding ring,' he says softly.
'It is if you accept it, Severus.'
'You want a ceremony?' he asks.
'No need for all of that, is there? We can do it now, right here. All you need to do is say yes, Severus. I want to be yours forever. That's all there is to it, really.'
I walk up to him and take the ring from his tentative fingers, lifting his hand purposefully.
'Well?' I smile at him, because I already know he's mine, as I am his.
'Yes, of course.' He smiles as I slip the ring onto his finger. It glows bright blue as it shrinks to fit, and I withdraw my wand, tapping it lightly as I murmur the simple bonding spell from one of Hermione's books.
A replica ring appears on my own finger, and Severus laughs finally, expelling the breath he's been holding. He threads his fingers through mine and we kiss briefly. Later, there will be time for words and emotions if necessary.
Right now, this is all we need.
The End
A/N: I want to thank everyone for sticking with this story, even though it's not my usual fare. I've had a lot of fun writing it so I hope you enjoyed reading it, too.
Big thanks to ARo for the beta, and another quick thanks to OrlandoSwitch for his help with chapter 12.
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Latest 25 Reviews for Making Happy
80 Reviews | 6.75/10 Average
So good to read this again.
Seriously lovely.
Yay for happy endings! You have done a fantastic job with this, Neelix. Really, it was beautiful from start to finish. I think this ended perfectly where it did, but I would be lying if I said I wouldn't be thrilled to see little glimpses of the future here and there. I like the conversation between mother and daughter on the train. It would be totally unrealistic if Harriet didn't have some reservations about how her peers would accept this unconventional family. It isn't the norm, and kids are cruel. Still, you make the point that different is not equivalent to bad. She just has extra people to love her is all. Regardless of her nerves about what people will think, I have no doubt that she knows deep down how very special she is and how very much she is loved.I don't think she will get too much grief about her parentage. Having three of the most instrumental folks in wizarding history as your family has got to count for something, right?I really, really love Harry's confidence in their relationship. He could feel nervous due to lack of verbal confirmation on Severus' part, and yet he seems to just know that this is right and that it will work between them for always.I hope the writing of this tale lifted your spirits a bit. I know reading it did for me. Thanks so much for sharing such a great story!
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
thank you so much for your positive response to this. I'm really pleased with the way it was recieved, and yes, I did really get a boost from wiritng it!There will be new one-shots intermittently I think, firstly from Severus' POV. I'm still off work but I hope to go back soon . I miss the craic, to be honest!
So glad to see them together at the end. I really liked your story telling from each person's point of view. As someone else said, Snape's point of view on the bonding would be lovely to see.Well done.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Thank yu so much for reading. I intend to do a few one-shots to go with this, i think.
This was fantastic. Although not my usual pairing preference, the characterizations were outstanding. I agree with the request for a sequel. Very interesting to see how they balance the alternative family and how the kids handle it. It is always fun to see the true potential of a kid with parents such as Hermione and Severus too! Thanks for writing!
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Thank you so much - I seem to have convinced a few people about the pairing!
Well now everything is sorted and in its proper space. Nicely done you!
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Thankyou! I had a lot of fun with this x
Well, my dear, this simply BEGS for a sequel !! Snarry is generally not my thing so much, but this tale was written with such sensitivity and plausability of character that I was ensnared. Fine work !!
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Wow. Thank you for that! perhaps I will do some one-shots to go along with this. A sequel would need further plot, and not their bonded there's no where to go!
AWWWWWWWWWWW! This is perfect ending. Maybe one day you'll write about Severus' feelings for this evening. I would have loved to see his face when he discovered the box in his plate. And his emotions while Harry paased the ring on his fingers should be interesting to know. Please?
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
I might do a special one-shot just for you from Severus POV :) Thanks for reading xx
Response from snitchette (Reviewer)
*squeeeee* THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!
Awww ... this was nice. One thing that I have really enjoyed about this story is that there is conflict at the proper times, but it is quickly resolved. Not that I don't enjoy long drawn out angst and such, but that is not what this story is ultimately about. I think the cat is out of the bag as far as any secrets between them, so all that is left to do is pursue this relationship. Something that I needed to convince me that this pairing can work is a mature Harry. I'm ok with SS/HG where she is young, but for some reason it is hard for me to stomach a young, inexperienced, immature Harry with Snape. No worries with this version of Harry; he is perfect.Hermione is going to be absolutely delighted by this latest development. Happy probably will be as well. I don't see that there is anywhere to go now, except towards a happy ending -- no pun intended :)
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Thank you honey - sorry I'm so late in replying, I've been off radar for a little while.Thanks for reading x
Well, from Harry's perspective, Hermione has given him a lot to think about. From my perspective, what the hell is he waiting for? Go to Severus now and tell him how you feel. Geez, men.I love the interaction between Severus and Happy. I can see why he was worried about Hermione taking her away as he clearly loves her dearly.Severus and Hermione have taken an awkward situation and made it even worse in the interest of protecting Harry and Happy. I hope they can make things right for all parties involved.I will be interested to know how Happy came about. I thought in the beginning that Harry and Severus were a couple and wanted a child and Hermione volunteered to help, but then somehow things went belly up and he and she ended up staying together. Then I thought that maybe Severus and Harry were a couple, but because of maybe lots of alcohol and some bad choices, they ended up sleeping together-just this one time- and Happy was the good and bad outcome. Guess I will wait and see.On a personal side note, Harry and Happy are two of the Hippos in the game Hungry, Hungry, Hippos which my son has just recently discovered. I've thought about you each and every one of the ten thousand times we have played over the last week :)
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Ahh yes, Hungry Hungry Hippos - this is the bane of Severus' life in Hilltop Cottage, the devil's own entertainment! lol!!More comes clear in the next couple of chapters, and as you say, Harry is never backward about coming forward so...
Response from HBAR (Reviewer)
I knew if anyone would understand my pain, it would be you and Severus!
At last! Harry knows the truth. Whew thats a releif. ((bounces)) Severus ought to duck if knows whats good for him. I expect he is going to get a good shouting at by med witch Potter. Hee
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
lol... I think there may be some strong words, you're right. Harry is like a dog with a bone really!
Hooray! You had me genuinely worried about Happy there. I have a very hard time picturing Hermione with Rosemerta, but then Ginny was taken and Lavender was REALLY not her type, so who knows? I guess the wizarding world figured out Artificial Insemination, though chances are they don't do it with a glorified turkey baster. ... well, maybe they do. Why use magic when simple Muggle methods work just as well? It's no use guessing- I'm pleasantly surprised every time.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Well. I'm glad I was able to make you feel something. Next chapter wont be long. Thanks for reading.
I can't wait to hear Severus' story about the conception of Happy. Because honestly I thougt it involved a lot of alcohool followed by a pityful performance and a great headache afterwards, maybe regrets too.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
That would have been a fun scenario to write, actually, but no, not like that. I won't keep you waiting for much longer.
... as I Floo home, I’m feeling more confused than I was before.*pats Harry on the back* "Me too buddy, me too."Where, may I ask, is my explanation of this vow? Hmmm? I'd sic Severus on you, but I'll be damned if he isn't soft and squishy around the edges in this tale. And if that sounds like a negative comment, it isn't. I love your Severus. He retains his hard exterior, biting words, inherent insecurities ... all of the things that make him who he is. But when he is with Hermione, or Happy, or now Harry, he softens a little and that makes a hard-to-love man loveable.You may very well be able to take credit after so many before you have failed, to turn me into a Snarry fan. I'll hold out until the end to decide, though. No pressure, really.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Thank you for reading, even if Snarry isn't your thing. I warn you now there will be sex coming up. I'll do my best to make it believable so that you don't feel the need to avert your eyes!Severus is a bit softer in this story. He's a different man, I think, and having Happy changed him beyond his own imagination. I'm sure that he's looked back on his own childhood and decided to be a different sort of parent.I have to be honest, I have struggled with the last couple of chapters. Hopefully the next one will be easier.
Response from HBAR (Reviewer)
I warn you now there will be sex coming up. I'll do my best to make it believable so that you don't feel the need to avert your eyes!You've found my issue with these two. There can be a ton of sex, or none at all ... I just always have a hard time with a relationship between these two feeling believable. I'm liking them so far, even though their interactions have been repressed. Fear not, I have absolute faith in you to make this work.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
No pressure then. That's good!lol... I'm on chapter 10, sex will be in 11 I'm thinking. Wish us luck (thats me, Severus and of course, Harry... bwahahahaha!!!!)
AAaarrgh! I thought we might find out about the Vow in this chapter!! Well, I am glad that Happy is alright, anyway. Both Hermione and Severus will be able to face anything that happens now. Severus seems to be a great father so why he should have worried about Hermione taking her away, I don't know. Still insecure that everyone he loves will die/run away I suppose and whatever he Vow is, I don't think it has helped him to grow emotionally. Though I think having a daughter has, so perhaps he's ready to jump into the deep end with Harry. *Crosses fingers!*
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
I think you're right about Severus and his insecurities. He has been abandoned by everyone he's ever cared about.The Vow isn't that exciting, really! lol... I think everyone will be majorly disappointed.
I'm so relieved Happy's well. I don't believe Severus would have ever recovered from her death, even with Harry's love to support him.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
I think you're right,
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
. Onwards...
Thanks for not killing Happy off. Okay I really didnt think you would, but I was nervous for a bit. The vow is lifted, the child is recovering seems to me its time for the adults to have a discussion. Drum roll please for the next chapter!
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
lol... Next chapter is on it's way. Thanks for reading x
Well it is about time. I've been wondering about all of this vow business; the what and the why of it all. I certainly hope that this means the next chapter gives more insight into it all. Knowing you and your wily ways, the next chapter will probably be from Happy's POV, and will take place while she is under for surgery so will just be a blank page, LOL. Ok. you're not that bad. Still, don't make us wait too long for more, pretty please.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Dont panic - Chapter 8 is with my beta ARo so you won't have to wait long - I really wish I had done a blank Happy POV, lol!!! I'm not that clever!I hope the reveal makes sense to everyone... *doubting self*
Oh, my gods..... what..... what...... ????!!!!
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
you need to refer back to Chapter 1! lol...
I can't believe I just tore right through the first chapters. I need another fix immediately! * taps foot* Lol, actually this is REALLY excellent. I'm quite enjoying it. Dare I surmise that...well no I won't. I'll let myself be surprised.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Thank you so much. next chapter is WIP but shouldn't be long x
Oh WOW he removed the vow ! I want the next chapter immediately!!! You are so evil to withhold it! This was just heartbreaking watching both Hermione and SEverus suffer so. Poor Happy.
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
It's carnage, I agree. It has to be. You have to break a few eggs... :)
What??? Oh my. *aughhhh...I have fallen.* Off the cliff I go.*giggle* Let's just say I am enjoying this immensely, and am looking forward to your next thrilling post.Thank you again for sharing~
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
I hope this means you enjoyed the chapter. lol! next update wont be as long, i promise.
YOU are a very bad author!!! What's this vow (un unbreakable one?) that he made. To what purpose? YOu better update quickly *stare menacingly at you*
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
hehe... *cackles evilly* *makes you wait*
What a delicious diner they had. I'm jealous. *wink*
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
I think I preferred the dessert! Thanks for reading x
I LOVE this chapter!! ANd considering thess two sentences "I’ve never seen him look so bloody edible in my life, and my mouth goes dry.""I feel an urge to lick the exposed flesh"I'm wondering what, precisely, thay are going to eat for diner...
Response from neelix (Author of Making Happy)
Haha... With Severus in the house there's only one thing on the menu ;)
Thanks for reading :)