Dreamless

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author.

Many thanks to Sequana for the beta of this chapter.

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Chapter 7: Dreamless

The dream had started off quite normally, depicting a scene and some people, all of them pontificating on the weather and conversing. It was only towards the end of it, just before she woke up, panting and sweating, that Hermione had seen an image of Severus lying dead at her feet, his lifeless eyes staring up at her. Over the last few days, she had been having a similar dream every night. She was tired because she was afraid to sleep for fear of having the nightmare once more. Groaning, she hauled herself from her bed, still trembling slightly as she made her way towards the bathroom to wash her face. The stone floor was freezing, and she hurriedly Summoned her slippers and stuffed her feet in them before rushing off to the bathroom.

She turned on the tap and splashed some water up onto her face before grabbing a washer and patting her face dry. She stared at her reflection, taking note of the dark circles beneath her eyes along with a slight thinness of her face. The stress she had been put under lately was getting to her. Sighing heavily, she left the bathroom, grabbing her thick, white bathrobe on the way and pulling it over the top of her flannel pyjamas. She then went to her sitting room and tossed some Floo powder into the fireplace. Stepping in, she called out for Severus Snape's office.

If she wasn't going to get any sleep, then the very least she could do was use the time productively and check up on the experimental potions they had brewing in his lab in the dungeons. One of the resulting potions was bound to be a cure for Michael's comatose state. Then, as soon as he was awake, Hermione would be able to question him about the people who had actually cursed him. She hoped, however, to discover the identities of her tormentors before having to resort to that.

Standing back from the last cauldron lined up on the bench, she removed the stasis on it and cast a charm to ignite a flame beneath it, setting it to simmer. Satisfied that everything was in order, she moved herself to one of the side benches and sat down on a stool there, Summoning the Potions journal she shared with Snape and a stack of parchments to her. The parchments in question happened to be all of the letters she had accumulated from her tormentors. It had been over a month since the first one had arrived by owl post to her, and there had been several more since then, including the one that she had found in the shack up in the Scottish Highlands.

Hermione Granger,

Don't take this the wrong way, Granger – just be aware that there are those that can outwit you still. Keep up the search – although I doubt it will do you any good.

'Does that letter bother you?' a silky voice asked from just over her shoulder.

She spun around on the shiny seat of the stool and saw that Severus was standing there, wearing trousers and a white linen shirt that was partially unbuttoned at the top. His arms were crossed over his chest, and he looked just as he always had during the days when they had still been together. He was so dashing and handsome to her that way, and her fingers itched to trace a line down his throat before pressing her palm to his chest beneath his shirt. The move used to make him shiver with arousal.

'How could it not bother me?' she asked meekly, running a nervous hand through her curls. 'We were just so close...'

He nodded simply. 'It bothers me also that they managed to get away from that place before we arrived,' he said, plucking the letter from her hand. 'But reading that letter over and over is unlikely to make you feel any better.'

She nodded. 'I know it only makes it worse, but I can't help but think that there is some truth to what they wrote. I would never have thought to go there at all had it not been for your help.'

'Don't be ridiculous,' he snapped, picking up the journal and flicking through it idly as he addressed her without looking at her once more. 'The magical theory was simply something I stumbled upon accidentally – anyone could have figured it out. It was a simple matter of deductive reasoning.'

'There is nothing simple about that,' she muttered, looking across at the potions, listening to the soft bubbling sounds of their simmering.

Snape remained silent, knowing that argument would be useless. Hermione, when her mind was set, was someone rather stubborn to come up against. But he loved her just the way she was. She looked so vulnerable sitting there on the stool, seeming downcast and low about herself. He felt a bubble of anger surge through him at the thought of her sadness. He would make the people who were doing this to her pay. He sighed heavily and picked up the stack of letters, placing them back on a shelf out of her sight for the time being. The last thing anyone needed was her to sulk all night and get very little of their important work done.

'What are your plans for tomorrow?' she asked him suddenly as he was stirring and checking the temperature of the first potion.

'I will be making the potions to restock them for Poppy and the hospital wing,' he answered, cleaning and then poking the stirring rod into the next potion and casting the charm on it to read the temperature. 'Why do you ask?'

'I was going to take a break in the afternoon and go into Hogsmeade for a drink – I was just wondering if you would accompany me or something,' she answered, looking a little sheepish at her request.

Severus felt his stomach do a flip, but he controlled his expression to remain as impassive as ever. 'I... might have some time free tomorrow afternoon,' he said a little stiffly. 'It all depends on whether I get the potions for Poppy done on time. Perhaps I could get some more work done on these potions as well,' he added, gesturing around.

Hermione sighed and nodded. 'Okay, well, perhaps I can help you with the potions for Poppy in the morning, and we can go out together after that,' she said with an imploring smile.

He nodded. 'Perhaps.'

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Hermione carefully measured the last of the potion into a vial before pushing a stopper into it and setting it carefully in one of the labelled boxes for the hospital wing. That done, she closed and stacked the boxes before picking them all up and going into Severus' office to Floo up to Poppy. She tossed a little Floo powder into the fireplace with one hand, balanced carefully, and after stepping in, she called out for Poppy's office. Stepping out, she found that the nurse wasn't there, so she left the boxes on her desk and then Flooed back to Severus' office.

'I delivered the potions to Poppy!' she called out as she walked back into the private lab to where Severus was cleaning up for the day and putting a stasis charm on all their potions.

'Very well; I am nearly finished here,' he answered, casting the unclean boards and knives to the sink, where they began washing with a flick of his wand. 'Are you ready to leave from here?'

Hermione nodded, holding up her thick, black winter coat. The snow had softly layered the ground a week earlier, and since then, more snowfall had made the layer of it thicker. She had gloves and a scarf in her pockets for the walk. He nodded curtly and finished, ducking into his quarters briefly to change from his robes into his own winter coat and grab his black gloves and dark grey scarf. Hermione smiled. She had given him that scarf several years ago. She was pleased to see that he still wore it.

'Ready to leave?' she asked.

He nodded. 'Certainly – lead the way,' he replied, gesturing for her to go first.

Hermione walked through the door first, and they ascended to the Entrance Hall, leaving through the front doors and exiting the castle. They had to walk briskly side-by-side, simply because it was too cold to dawdle and linger in the freezing snow. With only a week and a half before Christmas, Hermione knew she was going to have to make the most of the time she could spend with him before the holidays. He would be going into exam mode after that weekend and would be occupied with marking and various other assignments as well.

'Severus?' she asked, testing out his name aloud for the first time in a long while, looking over to him as she did.

He looked back at her, a little shocked at hearing her say his name. She had been thawing towards him in the past few weeks, he had noticed, but to hear her say his name was music to his ears. 'Yes, Hermione?' he answered in kind, figuring it was okay to say her name if she could speak his.

'We haven't talked about what happened seven years ago yet,' she said softly, staring at the ground as she walked. 'And I just wanted to say that I didn't mean for it to end so badly or for us to dislike and stop talking to each other.'

'I don't dislike you,' he stated blandly, chancing a glance in her direction. 'It was – difficult for me to watch you leave as you did. I thought it prudent to keep away from you for both our sakes.'

'I didn't think you cared,' she said, feeling a prickle of tears building in her eyes. 'It's why I left, you know. Because I thought you were only in the relationship t-to sleep with me or something...'

'And now?' he asked quietly. 'Do you still think the same thing now as you did then?'

Hermione shook her head. 'I hardly know what to think, Severus,' she said, choking a little on her tears as they walked. The wind chilled her face all the more. 'You never said a word before or after I made the decision to leave. I never knew what you thought or felt most of the time. I just wish you had been a little more open with me.'

Severus hesitated, realizing that if he spoke, he would be revealing more of himself to her than he had to anyone other than Poppy or Dumbledore. 'I... I was very upset when you left me, Hermione; this I will admit,' he said softly, staring straight ahead as he spoke. 'I had never felt anything strongly for anyone before you,' he continued. 'After you left – I found that I could not feel anything for anyone else because I never stopped caring for you.'

Hermione looked at him in surprise. 'Even now?' she asked.

He nodded simply, looking over and meeting her eyes. 'Even now,' he confirmed, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket and handing it over to her.

Hermione knew that what he had said to her that afternoon was very difficult for him to admit to her after so long. So she would accept it for the time being and safeguard her love for him until the moment when they would need it the most. Dabbing at her cheeks and eyes with the handkerchief, she then charmed it clean wandlessly and moved to hand it back to the owner. He shook his head and pressed it back towards her, closing her hand around it.

'Keep it,' he murmured. 'I have others.'

Hermione nodded, slipping it into her pocket before boldly moving closer to his side and looping one of her arms around his. He looked down at her, slightly startled, but he didn't remove her arm and even crooked his own a little to make it more comfortable for them as they walked. Hermione smiled, knowing that they had made some serious progress. They walked through the gates then, intent on getting to the pub as quickly as possible, when Severus heard a male voice from behind them.

'About time you got here, Mudblood,' said the man before Severus' world went black.

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