Chapter 11

Disclaimer: All things Harry Potter belong to JKR.

A/N: Beta, Cough Southern_Witch_69 Cough, what do you mean you're tired of hiding? You know we can't reveal your identity! The mods at Potter_Place would kill us! You get back in that room and hide until after voting!

Severus was sitting at the dinner table with the Malfoys, watching his son whisper excitedly to Scorpius. He'd given his permission for Liam to accompany the Malfoys on holiday. He would be gone for two weeks, but for once, Severus didn't mind the separation.

He was going to focus all of his attention on getting Hermione Granger back.

He remembered taking Liam back to her flat for dinner the day he'd told her about Shannon, and she hadn't been there. No doubt staying away because she knew that he'd be coming. As far as Severus could tell, Liam was somewhat disappointed, but not overly.

After that, Severus had realized that it was going to take more than merely baring his soul to her. He understood that she'd thought that he'd only wanted to be with her because of the baby, but that simply was not the case. He was in love with her. Now, all he had to do was convince her, and convince her that she loved him in turn.

He inwardly cringed when he thought of the things he'd said and done when they'd been in Italy. It had all started well enough. He'd wanted her sexually, and she had wanted him, but he'd also wanted it to end there. When it didn't, when he'd started having true feelings for her, he became... abrasive, wanting her to end things. But why?

Because he was scared, and being scared angered him. It was easier to blame her than to face his own short-comings, so that's what he'd done. But to what end? She was now expecting his child and wanted them to have weekend exchanges. No. Looking at Liam, he knew he'd never be able to bear that. He had no idea how Weasley did, nor did he care. He only knew that he would not submit them all to that.

He wondered if Hermione had ever been romanced. He doubted it. He'd certainly never done so, and he knew that it was highly unlikely that Weasley had. Dear Lord. That he knew of, he and Weasley were the only serious relationships that Hermione had been in. In his mind, Krum didn't count. It hadn't been truly serious as far as he knew. She'd only been fourteen at that time.

Wasn't that great? In both relationships, she'd been treated like shite. And boy did it grate that he'd been no better than a Weasley. Actually, he'd been worse because Weasley didn't start out acting like a git as he had.

Well, he'd correct that. He may have started out a git, but damned if that would continue. Thinking about it, he couldn't blame Hermione for refusing him. He sighed heavily.

"All right, Severus?"

Severus snapped out of his revive and looked at Lucius. "Perfectly so, Lucius. Just running a mental list of all the things I have to do tomorrow." Looking at his son, he asked, "Liam, are you sure that is the bedroom suite you want? I plan to pick it up tomorrow after you're gone."

"Yes, Dad. I've told you a hundred times!" Liam complained.

Narcissa chuckled. "Liam, your father just wants to make absolutely certain because you'll have that suite for a very long time."

"I know. Thank you, Dad. It really is the one I want. I like it the best out of all the ones we've looked out."

"All right. Are you all packed? Have you everything you'll need for your trip?"

"Yes, I think so. Would you check with me after dinner?"

Severus smiled. His son was so grown one moment, and so young still the next. He would miss him terribly when he went to Hogwarts in a few months. "Yes, I will."

"Severus?" Narcissa asked. "What will you do while we're gone?"

Severus looked at his meddlesome friend. She'd been after him to go to Hermione every day since she'd learned how he'd felt about the baby. "I have a house to set up. I'll be purchasing furniture and things like that."

"It's too bad I won't be here to help you. I think that every home needs a woman's touch. Perhaps your... friend, Hermione Granger, would help you."

"Must you start that tonight, Cissy?"

"Now, don't fuss, Severus! I just want to see you happy, that's all."

"What would really make me happy is if you'd mind your own business. I've run my life on my own just fine the past decade or so, and I can continue to do so without any meddling from you."

"I see," she said in a hurt tone, and Severus sighed.

"I'm sorry. That was harsh. I appreciate the fact that you want to see me happy and settled, and I love you for worrying about Liam and me. However, I'm not unhappy. Your version of happiness and mine are different. Did you ever take that into consideration?" Damned if he let on how much he wanted to marry Hermione. Cissy would be all over that one, possibly going to visit Hermione herself!

Lucius patted his wife's hand and then gently wrapped his fingers around hers. "Of course marital bliss is her form of happiness, and if you'd ever find the right one, you would recognize it."

"My dad was happily married! Right, Dad? My mum made you happy; didn't she?" Liam asked, sounding unsure.

Severus gave the elder Malfoys a sharp look. "Absolutely. We were very happy, son."

Narcissa turned to Liam. "Oh, Liam, Uncle Lucius and I didn't mean to imply otherwise. We know that your father was very happy with your mother. We just want him to find that again, and for you to have a mummy."

Liam shrugged, but Severus could tell that the subject was making him very uncomfortable. "If you're finished, we can to check your trunk."

Liam nodded and put his napkin into his plate. "I'm finished."

They both stood and walked out of the room, all eyes following them as they left.

***

Once they'd entered Liam's room and checked his trunk, Severus sat down on the bed with his son. "Liam, do you remember me speaking with you about Hermione Granger?"

Liam nodded. "She's the one that you're going to have the baby with; the one from the book store."

"That's right." Severus took a big breath for courage. He needed his son to understand that though he wanted to marry Hermione, no one would ever take his mother's place.

"I love her, son, and I hope to convince her to marry me. That does not, however, in any way, diminish the love I had for your mother."

Liam nodded. "Does she love you?"

"I think that she does."

"So, it's me then? She doesn't want to marry you because you have a son?"

Severus was shocked. He'd had no idea the boy thought such a thing. "Why on earth would you think that? I've told you that she has two children as well. It's certainly not because of you!"

"Because that night we were going to eat dinner with her. You said that you'd been there speaking with her that morning and told her that we would be back for dinner, but when we got there, she was gone. I thought it was because she didn't want to see me."

Dear Lord! Had the boy been thinking that all this time? "No, son, it was because she didn't want to see me. Remember I told you that she'd spent a few months in Italy while you were in Ireland?" Liam nodded, looking down at his shoes.

"When she was there, I behaved badly towards her, and for that reason, she doesn't trust me. It has nothing to do with you. She'd even told me that morning before I'd left her flat that she didn't want to go to dinner with me."

When Liam looked up at his father, he had tears in his eyes. "Are you sure? I wouldn't want to be the cause of you not getting married and being happy."

Severus took his son into his arms. "Oh yes, very sure. Hermione would love you as much as I do. And Liam, I'm happy now with you."

"Okay," Liam said after a few moments of cuddling. "I think I am going to have a bath and go to bed. Scorpius said we were going to leave early."

"All right. Do you want me to come back in later and tuck you in? Perhaps read you a story?"

Liam nodded as he headed for the loo. "Yes, I would. I'd like that a lot."

"Then I'll be back in about an hour," Severus assured him as he walked towards the door. Once he was in the hall, he put his face in his hands, shaking his head. He never wanted his son to feel like he was the cause of any unhappiness again, and he would see to it that he didn't!

***

Hermione sat on her stool behind the counter, sulking, though she would never admit that she was. "So much for Severus wanting us to be a big, happy family," she muttered to herself.

She knew that she'd been gone the night that he'd told her he wanted to have dinner, but honestly, she wasn't ready after all the emotional turmoil they'd had. She'd needed time to think things through. After the way he'd treated her, she felt that he owed her that much.

But the thing was, she'd not heard from him since. He'd not even owled her to ask after the baby, and Hermione found that odd, considering how adamant he'd been about being a part of his life. She shrugged. "Perhaps now that he's thought on it, he's decided that he doesn't want to be a part of our lives after all."

She reread the letter from Rose and Hugo for the hundredth time. If they were as concerned as Ron had said, they sure had a funny way of showing it. But still, she would talk to them about things once they got home. She didn't want them to be worried or confused. She wondered if Severus had spoken to Liam about things.

Hermione's heart leapt when the door opened as it had been doing for the past two days, annoying her even further. When she saw who'd entered, she was disappointed and happy at the same time.

"Neville! So good to see you! How have you been?"

"Really good. Hannah's expecting!"

"Oh, Neville, how wonderful!" Hermione stood to come around the counter and give her long time friend a hug.

"Whoa! Looks like she's not the only one." Neville gently pushed her an arm's length away, looking her up and down, and then got a confused expression on his face. "I thought that Ron... I mean to say that... He and Lavender... Didn't they?"

Hermione smiled when he stuttered and rubbed his arm. "It's not Ron's baby, Neville."

"Oh," Neville said, blushing crimson. "Sorry! I just assumed. I had no idea you were even seeing anyone! Anyway, how are Rose and Hugo? Looking forward to starting Hogwarts?"

"Doubtful just now," she told him. "They're in America with Ron and Lavender."

"I bet that's fun for them," he told her, a little sarcastically. "I swear, Hermione, I have to wonder at Ron. Lavender Brown?" He shuddered. "I would have that cow killed within a week."

Hermione laughed, appreciating her old school mate. "I thought on it a time or two myself, but I say let him have her. They deserve one another."

"That's low," he said as he laughed. "But accurate."

She kissed his cheek, enjoying his blush for having said such a thing. "You were always very sweet to me, Neville, and I've always been thankful for it. What else is Hannah up to these days besides carrying on the Longbottom name?"

"She's the landlady over at the Leaky Cauldron, didn't you know?"

"You know, I had heard that. I think I will go visit her one day this week. We should all get together. I miss everyone!" She hugged him. "I'm so happy you stopped by today."

"Anyway," he said, clearing his throat. "I came by to see if you have that new Herbology book, Life-threatening Underwater Plants, and also to see the shop since you've taken over. Sorry I haven't stopped by before now."

Hermione smiled. It was so like Neville not to pry her with uncomfortable questions. "No worries! Hmm, I might have a copy or two," she teased, placing her arm through his and walking over to the Herbology section with him to find it. They both turned when they heard the door open.

Hermione's mouth dropped open at the gigantic arrangement of flowers and the huge box of Honeyduke's finest. "Miss? Where can I put this?" the delivery boy asked, barely balancing his load.

"Oh, pardon me! One moment," Hermione said, walking back and clearing off the counter. "Set them down here." She opened the register to give the boy a tip, but he politely refused.

"The tip has been taken care of." He bowed slightly. "Have a nice day."

"Now that's impressive," Neville said, looking over the expansive flower arrangement. "And somewhat odd."

"Why odd?" Hermione asked, taking an appreciative sniff. "You think no one would send me candy and flowers?"

"No, it's not that at all! It's just, well, red roses represent passionate love, and white tulips represent forgiveness." When she only stared at him, he chuckled sheepishly. Holding his hand up, he said, "Sorry, occupational hazard. Whoever sent those to you likely just liked the way they looked together. Say, here's the card. See who they're from."

Hermione took the card and opened it, angling it in a way so that Neville wouldn't be able to read it. It simply said: Love, Severus.

"Well, don't keep me in suspense! Who are they from?"

"The baby's father," she told him without giving him a name.

"I see," he said. Eyeing the candy, he told her, "You know, that's not a bad idea. I think I'll stop and pick Hannah some up on the way home. Here, let me pay for this book."

"Oh, yes," Hermione said, having completely forgotten about the book Neville wanted to buy. As he was walking out, she said, "Give my love to Hannah!"

"Will do," he said and closed the door.

***

Hermione was so startled to see Severus leaning against her door when she got home that she almost dropped her flowers. "Severus! You scared me to death!"

"So sorry," he said, chuckling. "Here, let me get those while you get the door." When she opened the door, he followed her inside.

"What are you doing here, Severus?" Hermione knew that she sounded petulant, but she didn't care. To her aggravation, she'd been thinking about him all day and even more so since she'd received the candy and flowers. It made her mad at herself that she'd wanted to see him so badly and now, here he was, the pain in her arse.

"I've come to take you to dinner."

She looked around. "Is Liam with you?" She thought she saw a flicker in his eyes, but it was gone too quickly to be sure.

"No, he left on holiday with the Malfoys. I want to take you to dinner, Hermione, and talk."

"We can talk here, if you truly want to."

He raised an eyebrow. "Something amiss? Of course I truly want to."

She shrugged, trying to be nonchalant, but the gesture was too jerky to pull it off. "No, nothing. I just don't feel like going out, that's all."

He studied her, and she became uncomfortable. After a few moments, he said, "You need to eat, don't you? Going out would save you the trouble of preparing a meal."

Hermione took the vase from him and placed it on a table. "Just say what you've come to say, Severus," she told him wearily.

"Must you be so crass? How many times do I need to apologize to you before you believe that I'm sincere?" he asked, becoming agitated.

She turned to him, putting her hands on her hips. "I'm crass? Me? Well, you know what? Actions speak louder than words, and so far? You've been no action. You come here, you tell me that you want us to be a family, and then I don't hear from you for days! How am I supposed to interpret that, Severus?"

"After our last talk when I insisted that you go to dinner with Liam and me, I realized that perhaps I was pushing you too far. When we got here and you were gone, I'd thought that you'd needed some time to think things through. Was I incorrect?"

She shrugged and turned away without answering him. Of course that had been exactly what she'd needed, but he didn't have to know that. "You told me that you wanted us to be a family," she reminded him again. "Because of the baby?"

"Not entirely."

"Entirely?"

"The baby is a part of it, but, Hermione, I wanted you back before I'd learned that you were expecting my child."

"Why?"

Severus rubbed his temples and went to sit on the couch. He wanted to explain things to her, and he wanted to do it right. "The last night that you were in Italy on New Year's Eve? I'd come to the realization that I was tired of sabotaging my life. I wanted you, and for some reason, you wanted me. I'd realized that I'd been denying us both. I'd wanted to start things over with you. Perhaps not marriage so soon, but I've no doubt we would have headed in that direction even without the pregnancy."

"You mean while you were kissing another woman on your balcony? Is that when you realized this?"

"You never did let me explain that! I wanted to discuss Vivian with you also that night, but you would never let me get a word in edgewise."

"You're blaming me? Oh, yes. I could see talk is what you had on your mind. Coming into that bar and carrying me off like some caveman staking your claim."

"You were about to make a huge mistake, Hermione! What did you want me to do, sit back and let you make it?"

"You mean bigger than the one I'd already made with you?"

"Dear God," he said as a thought came to him. "Do you realize this baby could have been another man's? What was his name?"

No, this baby never would have been his because I never would have slept with him, or anyone else! Only you. "Bob, I think... No! Don't try to distract me. That is completely beside the point. I don't even know why you came looking for me in the first place!"

"Don't you? Well, if you'll sit down and speak with me, truly have a civilized conversation, I'll tell you. I want to talk to you, Hermione, and explain things, but only if you want to hear it."

Hermione nodded. She wanted to hear his explanation more than not. She had a very big decision to make and some very thick scars on her heart that needed healing. "I would like to hear it. Let me put on some tea, and then we'll talk."

A/N: Well, at least she's willing to listen now.