Five: Coming to Conclusions

Chapter Five: Coming to Conclusions

Lunch went smoothly, Severus entering and leaving on his own, then meeting Minerva back at her rooms afterward. Albus had told them that he had to take care of some neglected school business in the afternoon; he also wanted to check once more on the suite he had set up for them. Minerva continued with her research, although she was growing less hopeful with each passing hour that they would find any cure for Severus that didn't involve her "co-operation." Severus re-sorted the parchments.

Staring at her book as though concentrating on it intently, Minerva finally articulated to herself what she had known all along, but which she simply hadn't wanted to put in such raw, stark terms: she would have to allow Severus to have sex with her. And because of the nature of the Actus Adfectus Amor Verissimus, it was unlikely to be a quick process, either. The spell would insist that he show her his love and not simply satisfy an animal urge. She had the impression from what Severus had said earlier that he was not particularly well-acquainted with the art of making love to a witch. She had no illusions that Severus was completely sexually inexperienced, but she had never known him to be in a relationship, either. His notion of sex was likely divorced from any concept of love. Minerva hoped that he would have some finesse, though, as long as she had to endure it.

She sighed and closed the book. Looking at the mantle clock, she saw that they had at least a half hour before Severus would have to act on the imperative again.

"Severus, I am tired after the last few days. I am going to go take a nap. If I sleep long, please wake me as soon a you need me."

"I always feel the need for you, Minerva," he replied, "but I will wait until the need grows strong – but not too long, I promise. Do not worry about me, my love!"

Minerva went into her bedroom and lay down on the bed. Although she was tired, a nap had only been an excuse to get away from Severus for just a few minutes. It was very wearing to have him constantly with her, and she was growing tired of his constant proclamations of love and adoration. Even when he wasn't in the full thrall of the imperative, he was addressing her with terms of affection, and it seemed to Minerva that he could no longer look at her without appearing as though he was about to begin singing her praises at any moment. Minerva never realised that having someone worship you could be so tiresome!

She cast her mind again to the prospect of submitting to sex with Severus. Enduring sex with him. The prospect almost nauseated Minerva. It could be worse, she supposed. Some near-stranger or mere acquaintance could have been hit with the spell and been affected in the same way. She had read of instances in which that had happened. On the other hand, she might never have had to see such a person again. Severus, however, would be teaching beside her for at least the next several months. Given that he held the Defence position, Minerva didn't know precisely how much longer he would last, but probably till the end of the school year. And if Severus simply returned to teaching Potions at the end of it, she might have to live and teach with the wizard for a good many years to come.

Albus had told her he didn't want her merely to endure it. Truth be told, she wasn't sure she did, either. It would be better to have the act be something other than unpleasant. And Severus had expressed the wish to bring her pleasure, although he hadn't sounded particularly confident in his ability to do so. Despite the fact that the spell seemed to make him averse to causing her any discomfort, Minerva was not convinced that his previous sexual experience, whatever that was, combined with his professed ignorance of how to bring her pleasure, might not cause him to unintentionally be rough with her. If he was concentrating on bringing her enjoyment, however, he might at least succeed in not hurting her.

Minerva thought back on the lovers she had had before Albus. If this were forty years ago, she would have far fewer qualms about having sex with Severus – although she would never have simply leapt into bed with him the very afternoon he had been struck with the spell. But it had been so many years since she had been with anyone but Albus that, completely apart from the fact that she did not want to betray Albus by having sex with someone else, Minerva wasn't sure if she could make love with anyone else. She was getting older; she and Albus had a very special relationship and a still-active love life, but her body was not what it once was. Even if she wanted to enjoy sex with some other wizard, could she? It was peculiar enough to contemplate that a younger wizard possessed carnal desire for her, but to imagine herself in the throes of passion with some young wizard? That was certainly an incongruous thought. It was quite easy for her to let go and react with abandon when Albus made love to her, but it seemed slightly absurd to imagine losing herself in passion as some younger wizard made love to her.

Not just "some" younger wizard, Minerva thought with a sigh. Severus. Severus, who not only loved her, but who lusted for her. He hadn't even been aware of it, either. How very peculiar that he should have walked the halls of Hogwarts for so many years, apparently loving her and being physically attracted to her, and yet never knowing it himself. Severus had not believed they were even friends, although Minerva herself was sure that had she ever asked an important favour of him, he would have obliged her – with some grumbling and a mention of her debt to him, but he would have done it.

As Minerva was contemplating their friendship, there was a light knock on the door and it opened slightly.

"Minerva? May I come in?"

"Of course, Severus. I should get up now, anyway."

"Please don't; you have been working far too hard, my love, and you have your ordeal tonight. You must be rested for that."

Minerva had almost forgotten the potion she was to take. Well, she'd deal with one unpleasantness at a time. "You may come here, Severus." She rolled onto her side and faced him, propping herself up on one elbow. "I appreciate your allowing me to rest. It has been a trying few days."

"I am very, very sorry, Minerva. I will try to make the coming hours and days as comfortable for you as possible. You have been so good to me." He sat on the bed by her feet. "I love you dearly and truly . . ."

Minerva sighed as she listened to yet another long-winded proclamation of love. Unable to bear it any longer, she finally reached up and pulled him down toward her. "Just touch me or something, Severus. I think I am a bit too sleepy to listen to you right now," she said, trying to be diplomatic.

Severus took in a breath and let it out slowly before kicking off his shoes and lying beside her. Minerva lay on her back and looked up at him as he pushed himself up with one arm and hovered over her. Lips slightly parted, he began to trace a line from her eye down her cheek, around her jaw, then to her mouth. With his index finger, he lightly brushed Minerva's lips. "Such sweet lips, sweeter than the bud of any rose."

He gently caressed Minerva's neck and, with just his fingertips, softly swept the exposed skin of her chest before returning his touch to her cheek. Severus leaned closer to Minerva and murmured, "My sweet," before kissing her temple, the apple of her cheek, then trailing soft, whispered kisses along her cheek and jaw to just the corner of her mouth. His lips moved to her other cheek then. As Minerva moved her head in response to a tender caress of her chin, Severus began to kiss her neck, pausing to repeat his kisses at her soft pulse points, until he reached the hollow of her throat. Caught up in the moment, Severus moved to embrace her, placing his hand between her shoulders and lifting her slightly in order to better access the soft, creamy skin of her neck and chest.

Minerva had vowed to relax and attempt to appreciate Severus's attentions, but she was nonetheless surprised by her body's response to his gentle, intimate touches – intimate but not yet completely intrusive. As his lips moved, feather-light, from the hollow of her neck back to her pulse point then down again, proceeding to the soft skin just above her breasts, Minerva involuntarily gasped. The sensation that rippled through her was slight but sudden, and she was surprised by the tingle Severus had been able to elicit.

Severus began to raise his head, but Minerva, with eyes half-open, simply raised a hand to caress his cheek and comb his hair back. A relaxed, blissful expression on his face, Severus resumed his attentions to her chest and neck before moving back up to her ear, which, to Minerva's gasped astonishment, he first kissed, then licked, tracing the shell of her ear before flicking his tongue into her ear then suckling her earlobe.

Swallowing hard, Minerva pushed Severus from her. "I think that should be quite enough for now, Severus." She was aware that she must be slightly flushed.

"I am sorry, Minerva." Severus sat up, looking somewhat ill-at-ease. "You do need to stop me. Once I begin, it I as though I am in a fog; I am aware only of you and what I am doing. I would not think to stop."

"It's all right, Severus. This should 'recharge' you for a while, shouldn't it?" Minerva asked as nonchalantly as she could.

"Yes." He hesitated. "Minerva? Did I . . . was I able . . . did I bring you . . . any pleasure?" he whispered, flustered by his own question.

"You did very well, Severus. For a man who expressed doubts about his ability to do that, you did very well, indeed. Thank you. I appreciate your thinking of me."

Severus smiled. "I think I actually feel better doing it now – touching and kissing you – since I am trying to bring you pleasure. But I wasn't sure I was succeeding." He blushed, and Minerva thought he looked very much like a schoolboy, but a schoolboy quite unlike the one he had actually been. It would be something of a shock when he was back to being his usual acerbic self.

A short time later, Minerva had curled up for a genuine nap, Severus having returned to the sitting room to do whatever it was he was doing out there, when he suddenly burst back in. "Minerva! Minerva! Wake up! There's someone at your door! The knight says it's a student."

Grumbling, Minerva slipped on her shoes, directing Severus to stay behind in her bedroom, and walked out to see what needed her attention. Hopefully, it wasn't a problem in Gryffindor, or she might have to leave. Although Severus's attentions had been rather extensive this last time, she didn't know how long he could wait for her to return.

She opened her door to find sixth-year Gryffindor prefect Hermione Granger standing there. Lovely. Minerva liked Hermione – she reminded her somewhat of herself at that age – but the girl did tend to be verbose and persistent. She might not be easily got rid of.

"Miss Granger, good-afternoon. May I help you?"

"I hope so, Professor. I have been looking for the Headmaster; he's not in his office, and I have checked the library. I didn't know where else to look. I thought you might know where he was."

"The Headmaster is quite busy today, Miss Granger. Is there something I can help you with?" asked Minerva, hoping Hermione would say "no."

"Well, no, but I really do need to see the Headmaster."

"He is not available at the moment, as I have said. It will have to wait."

A strained look passed over Hermione's face. "Well, then . . . do you know where Professor Snape might be? I looked in his office, then I hung about the dungeons for a bit – not recommended for a Gryffindor! – but I couldn't find him, either."

"And what might you need to see the Head of Slytherin about, Miss Granger, that you could not discuss with me?" Minerva had a feeling she knew why it was that Hermione wanted to see Severus, but Albus had never confirmed to the girl that Severus had been affected by the spell – although, bright as she was, Hermione must have surmised that from the Headmaster's interest in it – and Minerva thought it prudent not to bring it up.

"Just a problem with a Slytherin, that's all."

"I am the Deputy Headmistress as well as your Head of House, Miss Granger!" Minerva said sharply.

Hermione shifted uneasily. "I don't know if Professor Dumbledore told you or not, but a Slytherin was accidentally hit by a spell a few days ago. I just had something I needed to tell him about it, that's all. But if he's busy . . . I guess I'll have to wait. I'll go sit by the gargoyle until he returns."

"Oh, just let the girl in, Minerva." Severus's voice came from behind her. He had evidently been listening from the bedroom. "Better that than have her wandering the halls looking for Albus."

Hermione's eyes widened when she heard Snape's voice, but when Minerva opened the door wide enough to permit her entry, she quickly stepped through. "Professor Snape! Are you all right, sir?"

"Just bloody marvellous, Miss Granger. As you have no doubt guessed, or you would not be hounding the Headmaster and me," Severus grumped.

Minerva smiled. He sounded almost like himself, although his tone was milder.

"Miss Granger," Minerva began, "you may have deduced that I am aware of the unfortunate spell that Miss Parkinson cast. You might as well tell us what you came to say."

Hermione hesitated. "I think it would be better if I told the Headmaster, Professor. No offense. It has nothing to do with you."

"Miss Granger! You will show Professor McGonagall more respect, do you understand me?"

"Hush, Severus. Why don't you go . . . do something, hmm?"

Hermione looked around her as if seeing the scattered books, parchments, and scrolls for the first time. She looked at Snape, then at her Head of House, then back at Snape. Her mouth formed a round "o."

"Have a seat, Miss Granger. I see that you have come to certain conclusions." Hermione nodded at Minerva. "I would prefer not to discuss those conclusions, however. Nonetheless, you can see that it might behoove you to tell me what it was you wanted to say to Professor Dumbledore. I will be happy to relay your message. And if you simply wanted to see Professor Snape and reassure yourself of his health and well-being, you have seen him and can rest assured that he is in capable hands."

Hermione glanced behind her, where Severus had seated himself at the table and was going through a stack of parchments. Looking back at the Deputy Headmistress, Hermione said, "I am glad to see that you and Professor Dumbledore are taking care of him, but I can't tell you why I need to see him."

"And what would you do if the Headmaster were indisposed?"

"I suppose you would be Acting Headmistress. I would have to consider telling you. Is Professor Dumbledore indisposed, Professor?"

Minerva sighed. "No, and he will be returning here at some point this afternoon, but you cannot stay here. Perhaps you could leave him a note?"

"No . . . I will come back, then. In an hour?"

Hermione certainly was persistent. Minerva was becoming impatient with her. "Miss Granger, as I –"

"Oh, let your cub stay, Minerva. Unless it would disturb you. It's too late, anyway. She's seen me here. She's not a complete dunderhead. Better to have her here where we can keep an eye on her." Severus sounded resigned. "Unless you want to Obliviate her. No, didn't think so. Better keep her here, then." He sighed and turned back to the colourful list he had been scrutinising.

Hermione stood up and turned to face Snape. "Professor Snape, I am sorry about your current . . . state. I am not entirely sure what is going on, although I have a few ideas. However, if you think you need to keep an eye on me to ensure that I will not tell anyone that you are here, let me please reassure you that I would not dream of telling anyone, no more than I have told anyone about the incident in which you were hit by Pansy's spell. And if you are worried that I might tell Harry and Ron about any of it, I haven't and I wouldn't."

Severus looked at her with a slightly blank expression, then he snorted and turned back to his parchments.

"Well, if you are staying, would you care for some tea?" Minerva asked. "A biscuit, perhaps?"

"No, thank you. But . . . maybe I could help?" Hermione gestured at the books.

"That's all right. We have reached the final stages of our research. You're welcome to read whilst we wait for the Headmaster, however."

Severus looked up at Minerva when she said that, but apparently deciding that the love of his life would not do anything she shouldn't, he returned to his parchment-shuffling and note-taking.

An hour later, and Minerva and Hermione were sipping tea and munching on ginger newts. Minerva had her feet up and was leafing through a large, yellowing folio of hand-written notes taken by some witch about one hundred years before, and Hermione was lounging on the settee reading the book with lurid descriptions of people who had been afflicted by the Actus Adfectus Amor Verissimus and other similar spells. Minerva wasn't sure she was old enough to be reading about such things, but after what the girl had been through in recent years, Minerva wasn't going to stop her. After all, she had been younger than Hermione when she had developed an almost obsessive interest in the nasty effects of curses on the human body. Although the full-plate picture of a wizard castrating himself might be a bit much . . .

Minerva became aware that Severus was beginning to become agitated, jiggling, running his hands through his hair, chewing a quill to shreds – but what was she to do?

"Severus, should we ask Miss Granger to return later?"

"What?" he answered, glassy-eyed. "No. No. I'm fine."

"You're not fine, Severus." Minerva turned to Hermione. A serious, almost grim, expression on her face, she said, "Hermione, I hope you will excuse us for a moment. The Headmaster may return; you may tell him that we are . . . next door."

Hermione nodded solemnly and tried to avert her gaze as Minerva went over to Severus, gently took his elbow, and led him into her bedroom. When the door shut behind the two, Hermione shuddered slightly, then went back to her book.

When Minerva and Severus returned to the sitting room less than ten minutes later, they found Albus and Hermione sitting together on the sofa, drinking tea and eating biscuits.

"Hello, my dear! Severus," Albus greeted them cheerily. "Hermione has been taking good care of me; we've been having tea and biscuits and a very interesting chat."

"The girl wouldn't tell us why she was here, Albus. She was most rude to the Deputy Headmistress." Severus seemed fixated on what to him was Hermione's blatant disrespect for Minerva. He scowled at the young Gryffindor.

"Severus, my boy, don't pout. It's most unbecoming. Hermione had a perfectly legitimate reason not to share with you the reason she was looking for me." He stood and went to Minerva. Taking her hand, he said, "I am most sorry to have to abandon you once more, my dear. I need to go with Hermione right now – I would explain, but I believe time may be of the essence. I will tell you both all about it when I return. In the meantime, might I suggest that Severus pay a visit to Slytherin House, just to make an appearance – find some excuse to speak with one of the younger ones, I think, Severus. Don't want any older ones noticing anything . . . unusual in your behaviour. Minerva can send for you if you haven't returned here within the margin of safety, hmm?"

Minerva sighed and nodded. Severus looked grim, but left for Slytherin, casting only one backward glance at Minerva before closing the door behind him.

"Miss Granger, could you wait in the hall a moment, please," Minerva directed.

When Hermione was safely in the corridor, Minerva hugged Albus tightly. "I wish I knew what you were up to, but I just needed to give you a quick kiss before you left, Albus."

He smiled at her, eyes twinkling. "So where is it, then?"

"It's yours for the taking," Minerva answered, leaning back, arms around his neck.

"I think I may do just that." Albus pulled Minerva toward him and kissed her once, softly, on the lips. He looked at her a moment, then kissed her again, beginning gently, then becoming more impassioned. Suddenly he winced and pulled back. "Sorry, my dear. The hand again."

"I'm sorry, Albus." She took his right hand in her own hands and raised it to her mouth, kissing it gently.

Albus kissed her once more on the cheek before turning and leaving to meet Hermione.

Minerva sighed when, forty-five minutes later, she heard the door open. Thinking it was Severus, she put a neutral expression on her face and continued reading, hoping he wouldn't need her attention just yet.

"I know I haven't been gone long, but a greeting would have been nice, my dear."

Minerva looked up, a smile lighting her face. "Oh! I thought it was Severus." She accepted Albus's kiss, and when he led her to the settee, she didn't hesitate to curl up against him.

"So, are you going to tell me what all that was about?"

"I will, in due time. However, since I don't want to repeat myself, I thought we would wait for Severus."

"Mmm," agreed Minerva laconically. "I'm so tired of all this, Albus. And it's only Sunday. If it weren't for the fact that it doesn't work to release the spell, I'd be tempted to just take a dose of Draught of the Living Death right now and let Severus have his way with me." Unfortunately, the spell required the object of affection to be awake and aware at the time of final consummation, as many a witch and wizard had previously discovered to their woe.

Albus shuddered. "That's a dreadful thought, Minerva. Worse than the other."

"What 'other,' Albus? We've been pussy-footing around this long enough. We might as well be frank about it. I am coming to terms with it – not fully, of course – but you and I both know that, if there is no other solution, Severus has to have sex with me. And it has to fulfill the requirements of the spell's imperative. No five-minute quickie." Albus's response was to hold her more tightly. "And," Minerva continued, "I think I'd honestly feel more used at the end of it, more degraded, if it were just a five-minute quickie. Once I acknowledged the reality of the situation, I began to understand better exactly how important it is, not for Severus, but for me, if I don't merely submit to it. You were very wise to have begun raising this issue for me as early as you did, Albus. It will give me time to grow used to the idea, come to terms with it, and maybe come out of this with some of my own dignity and sense of self-worth intact."

Albus kissed her head. "I am glad, Minerva," he said softly. "I have been so worried about you. And when you asked me if I would have you do it even if you didn't want to . . . it almost broke my heart."

"I am sorry, Albus. I didn't really believe you would. I just had to hear you say it. I'm sorry if I hurt you."

"Do not be. I should have been clearer about that from the beginning. But that it might ever enter your head, after all these years, that I would lightly and willingly hand you to another man, even under these circumstances . . ."

"I didn't really believe that – just had the tiniest bit of worry, that's all. It's simply that this is such a bizarre situation . . . the fact that it is Severus only complicates matters."

"I know, my dear, I know; and it's all right, I understand. Where is Severus? Has he been back already and gone out again?"

"Oh! I should have Flooed his office ten minutes ago to ask him to return!"

Minerva was just gathering a pinch of Floo-Powder to call Severus when the wizard himself Flooed through and stepped into the sitting room. Other than a slight tremor and a dazed look on his face, he didn't seem worse for the extended trip from Minerva's side. Nonetheless, he nodded at Albus, then turned to Minerva and asked her if they could go into the other room for a few minutes.

"In a moment, Severus. How are you feeling?" Minerva asked.

"Not well. But I will wait." He flopped into a chair.

"Albus wanted to tell us about his outing with Hermione."

Albus looked from Minerva to Severus and back again. "It can wait, Minerva."

"But I am curious, and you did say you only wanted to wait until you could tell us both at once. We're both here now, as you can see."

"Yes, but only one of you is fully present." Albus gestured toward Severus, who was digging his fingernails into his thighs and had begun to sweat. "Don't worry, my dear, I am not going anywhere – I will tell you all about it when you're through. However, no need to retire to the other room, Severus. I think I will make us some tea. I'll just be in the kitchen, my dear," he said, rising and giving Minerva a kiss.

"You don't need to leave, Albus," Severus croaked. "I can." He sighed and looked down. "Not alone, though," he whispered almost inaudibly.

Minerva sighed. "All right, Severus. Why don't we just spend a little time out here, and Albus can go fetch us all some tea." She held out her hand to him as Albus stood and left for Minerva's tiny kitchen.

"I'm sorry, Minerva." Instead of sitting beside her on the sofa, as Minerva had intended him to do, Severus knelt before her and took one of her hands in both of his. "You are sick of me. I know it. I knew this time would come, no matter how hard I tried to please you," he said, his voice raspy with tears. "Won't you please have Albus brew me that potion? It would free you from my attentions. I do not want to continue to cause you such discomfort." Tears rolled down his face and fell on Minerva's lap.

"No, that wouldn't be right, Severus." Minerva took out her handkerchief and wiped his tears from his face. She tried to grin at him. "I told you this morning that I am just a cranky old witch. I am sorry if I have been impatient with you this afternoon. I am tired, Severus, and not just of you. I really need a nap this afternoon, and I haven't managed to get one yet. Come, don't cry."

Severus buried his head in her lap and wept. "You are too good, Minerva. Too good for me. Too good to have to endure this."

"Shush, Severus. I don't want to hear you talk like that. And you have done very well, trying to make the situation comfortable for me. And you have done quite well in your effort to –" Minerva swallowed "– bring me pleasure. I would appreciate it if you would continue."

Minerva held out her handkerchief to him, and he took it, wiping his face. "I am sorry, Minerva. I got your robes all wet. I would dry them, but my magic is a little shaky; I'd probably either make them wetter or set them on fire!" Severus tried to smile, as though he had been joking, but Minerva was alarmed. She knew that a wizard's magic became increasingly impaired as the spell's hold tightened, but she wasn't prepared for Severus's ability to be weakened so soon. Nonetheless, she smiled back.

"I'm sure a few tears won't hurt them, Severus. Now, Albus will have our tea soon. Why don't you . . ." Minerva pushed his hair back from his face.

Severus kissed her inner wrist and closed his eyes before proceeding to kiss each finger in turn, then laying his head back in Minerva's lap and snuggling closer to her, kissing her thigh several times through her robes. As his face relaxed and his trembling subsided completely, Minerva's own eyes filled with tears. She would have to be more patient with him. He would remember all of this when they were through. She did not want him to remember grovelling to her, begging her to let him die; she did not want him to remember any reluctance or distaste on her part. The Severus she knew was a proud man – not always, or even often, pleasant – but he was proud, and he had done Albus great service in his life. In fact, Albus would be dead now, if it hadn't been for Severus's help earlier that summer. She could at least help him come out of this with some of his self-esteem intact.

A few minutes later, Albus returned to the sitting room, a tea tray with two teapots hovering in front of him, to find Severus sitting in a chair and Minerva on the sofa, waiting for him.

He smiled brightly at the two. "Tea?"

Minerva waved her wand and cleared some books from the coffee table; the tea tray settled down on it.

"Two pots, Albus?"

"Mmhm. A nice chamomile and catnip infusion for you, my dear, and a pot of Darjeeling for Severus and me – unless you would prefer the tisane, Severus? There should be enough."

"No, thank you, Albus. I believe Minerva has a right to have something for herself without having to share it with me," he said with a sigh.

Not responding to Severus's statement, Albus asked, "Would you be mother, Severus, and pour?"

"Of course, Albus." Severus straightened. "Would you like milk, Minerva?"

"No, thank you, Severus. Just a tiny touch of honey would be nice."

Severus fixed Minerva's cup, then fixed Albus's tea the way he knew he liked it – milky with a lump of sugar. He poured himself a cup, black. After tasting it, he added a lump of sugar, sipped it again, and smiled slightly.

After they had all drunk a little tea, Minerva turned to Albus. "Could you tell us what it was that Hermione wanted?"

"Mmm," he replied as he took another swallow of tea. "Apparently a Slytherin had a crisis of conscience." Severus snorted but said nothing. "Hermione found Miss Parkinson in the library in fruitless search of a book that would tell her more about the spell. When she saw Hermione, she was apparently under the false impression that Hermione had removed all of the pertinent texts from the library, since Draco had told her that he had seen her with such books on Friday. Hermione managed to convince her that the books she had found had not been useful and that she had reshelved them. At that point, Pansy attempted to persuade her to help her find those books so she could read them for herself. Apparently, Miss Parkinson had reread her own book, the one from which she had originally obtained the spell, and discovered a few things about the Adfectus that frightened her. Hermione reluctantly told her she had found a few books that were informative and that she would retrieve them for her from her dormitory. She arranged to meet Miss Parkinson back in an isolated corner of the library later this afternoon. Hermione thought that if Pansy were that concerned about the spell, she might be willing to discuss it with me."

This time, Severus's snort turned into a barked laugh. "And you two no doubt learned that Miss Granger was incorrect about that and now Parkinson is certainly even more suspicious about the effect the spell had on me, if you were asking about it."

"You are actually incorrect, Severus. Miss Parkinson is not an altruistic person, but she did fear for what she might have done to you. To make a long story short, she agreed to allow me to use Legilimency on her once I had promised that I would avoid looking at any memories that didn't have to do with the spell – and she trusted me, Severus," Albus added. "She no doubt thinks I am a crazy old Gryffindor who doesn't know how to take advantage of an opportunity."

"You are not that, but you are too honourable to make such a promise and not abide by it," replied Severus, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Mmm, perhaps. Although what I might think relevant to the spell might be somewhat different from her own notions. As we had agreed, as soon as I was through, I Obliviated her and planted the suggestion that I had asked her about something entirely unrelated to the Adfectus, and I left. Hermione then returned, handed the girl a few of the books that I deemed were safe for her to have, and that was that."

"So what did you learn?" asked Minerva.

"It appears that it was a genuine accident and Severus was not the victim of an ambush. Miss Parkinson found the book on the shelves of her parents' library this summer. She was not particularly diligent in reading the particulars about each spell and stopped reading whenever it was evident that a spell was of no use to her. When she came upon the class of Adfectus spells in the book, however, she skimmed through them until she found the one that the text initially described as 'the most useful' of all Adfectus spells. Once she'd read through the incantation, the wand movement, and the intent required, however, she failed to read the remainder of the description. She is relieved that she didn't hit Draco, but is concerned about you, Severus. I think it would be good if you put in an appearance in the library before dinner – I planted the additional suggestion that she would not want to leave the library until it was time for dinner. It certainly couldn't hurt her to study a bit longer on a Sunday afternoon."

Minerva chuckled; Severus quirked a smile, but looked uneasy. "What should I tell her, Albus? I am so angry with her, I am not sure I can have a civilised conversation with her."

"Tell her, perhaps, that you are having some trouble sleeping, but that beyond that, you haven't noticed any untoward signs. Remind her that not everyone is affected by the curse in the same way –"

"But Albus, despite what Parkinson believed when she cast the spell, everyone who is hit by the spell is affected by it – it's just that some poor devils walk around for weeks before they encounter their true love and the spell is completed."

"Yes, and the symptoms of that are insomnia, lack of appetite, irritability, and the like – which is so like your own usual behaviour as to be almost indistinguishable from it. If Miss Parkinson can believe that your true love is not only unknown to you, but that she does not reside at Hogwarts, your trip for potion ingredients can serve a secondary purpose. When you 'return' from it, you can assign Miss Parkinson further detention. Imply that the spell completed while you were away from the castle – and suggest whatever else you might need to in order to preserve your dignity and your status."

"She'll want to know who it is, Headmaster – and even if she doesn't ask, word might get back to the Dark Lord. She's sure to tell Draco and others."

"You must say and do whatever necessary in order to make it clear that she would be extremely ill-advised to do that."

"I wish we could just feed her to the Giant Squid and be done with it," Severus grumbled.

"The Giant Squid does not eat students, Severus," Albus admonished mildly.

Minerva laughed. "If it makes you feel any better, Severus, I saw Argus this morning, and Pansy will be spending this evening cleaning the Owlery on her hands and knees with a toothbrush. She will do that every night until it's completely clean. Cleaning the Owlery will count as only one night's detention no matter how long it takes – Argus believes those are your instructions, I hope you don't mind – so after she has finished that, she will still have four nights of detention remaining."

"But there are owls in there all day and all night – in between cleanings, it will just get filthy again," Severus said, somewhat perplexed.

"Precisely." Minerva gave a wicked grin. "It will take her a few nights before she realises that if she doesn't finish it in one go, she will have to come back every evening for the rest of the year! She may eventually manage to clean the entire Owlery in one night, but only by spending hours and hours crawling around in owl droppings."

Severus began to chuckle, then to chortle, then to hoot with laughter. When he finally caught his breath, he looked at Minerva, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes. "You truly are wonderful, Minerva. And I wish I weren't under the effect of this spell so you would believe me." He smiled at her in admiration.

Albus was smiling as well; it was good to see Severus laugh a genuine and non-hysterical laugh, although he hadn't found Minerva's altered detention quite as amusing as Severus had. On the other hand, the girl's irresponsibility had cost all three of them dearly, so he was not about to chide Minerva for her somewhat cruel punishment.

Minerva looked over at Albus. "I know you likely don't approve, Albus, but if I had my way, the girl would be expelled – that curse has the potential to be deadly, and you know my feelings on such things. I also would have taken every point in Slytherin's hour glass, if it weren't that it would punish Severus as well."

Albus patted her knee. "It's fine. Probably quite apt. And very Slytherin – just the sort of thing that Severus himself might have come up with." He looked at the two. "Now, I realise that Severus could probably go a bit longer before spending more time with you, my dear, but I would like him to go up to the library before dinner, and I need to explain to you how to administer the potion, what to expect, and so on. So, Severus," he continued, "come give my . . . Minerva a kiss and get going. I can also tell that she's in dire need of a nap."

Severus stood, looking a bit nervous, but he went over to Minerva and, as Albus watched, he raised her hand to his lips.

"I doubt that will hold you very long, Severus. Go ahead. I did hear everything from the kitchen, you know."

Severus dropped Minerva's hand and blushed. "I'm sorry, Albus."

"It's the spell. You have never behaved this way toward Minerva before, and I have no reason to believe you will be likely to once you are released from it. So go ahead."

Severus stood there a moment before awkwardly bending toward Minerva, closing his eyes, and kissing her cheek. He kissed her cheek twice as the spell's imperative urged him further. He moved to cup her face in one hand and place his other on her shoulder, then kissed the side of her face and her neck. He caressed her face and throat, fingers trailing their way down to Minerva's chest until she caught his hand and gently eased him away. Severus's face was relaxed as he straightened, but when he caught sight of Albus sitting there beside Minerva, he flushed and looked away.

"I'll just Floo to my rooms, then, and go to the library. I will return here via the Headmaster's office in about an hour, then we can go to dinner." He backed up, went over to Minerva's fireplace, and left with the burst of green flame.

"I'm sorry, Albus," Minerva whispered when he had gone.

"I actually needed to see that. I am not entirely sure why, myself, except perhaps to see that he is being gentle with you. But I also know that you have had to put up with more than I; I cannot share your burden directly, but perhaps I can offer you my support."

"I know I have that, my love," Minerva said, leaning back against him and curling her feet beneath her. "Your love, your support, your understanding . . . you have been far better in this situation than I believe I could have been if our roles were reversed."

"Yes, I'm sure that seeing Severus kiss and caress me would be quite disturbing," Albus joked. Minerva elbowed him lightly in the ribs, but she smiled.

"So, when do we get to see this suite of rooms, Albus?"

"I will bring Severus by on our way to dinner. If you don't mind waiting until after your trip to the infirmary, that might be best, given what time it is now and your need for a nap. Besides, you already are familiar with them – although they will appear somewhat different from the last time you saw them."

"Really? But –"

"The rooms I used when you were a student here – actually, until I became Headmaster. I believe you visited them a few times during your Animagus training."

"Yes . . . funny, I could never figure out where they were – I wandered around outside the castle one day, looking up from a spot I knew I had been able to see from your guest room, but I couldn't figure out where they were. It seemed particularly odd because there were windows in the hallway outside your rooms, as well, and yet I couldn't find those windows from the other side of the castle, either – in fact, it seemed impossible that those windows even existed; they should have been inside the castle, the way I figured it."

"Mmm. It is complicated. It's a kind of a . . . bridge within the castle, but it's also part of Gryffindor tower, although it probably didn't feel that way to you. Anyway, it hasn't been used since I vacated it forty years ago, and it is just as unplottable now as it was then, so perfect for our needs. I still won't be able to give Harry his map back, though, since he would notice that you aren't in the Hospital Wing, and we can't have that."

"No, that would create even more difficulties than we already have. Speaking of the Hospital Wing, you were going to tell me about the potion and what I should expect."

"Yes, and I'm afraid you will be very uncomfortable from it. I don't like doing this, but it meets our requirements. You have to have an illness requiring you to remain in seclusion and receive no visitors, and this fits the bill. The muscle spasms, which I mentioned in Severus's presence, will actually be quite violent – it will appear that you are having seizures, but it will only effect your muscles. There will be no seizure activity in your brain. To make certain that the potion did exactly what we wanted it to and no more – and to reassure myself that it would not be unbearable for you, my dear – I took some of the potion myself this afternoon, which was one reason I was gone for so long. Do not worry! I did it in the infirmary under Poppy's watchful eye. You will feel as though you have severe muscle cramps. There will be some nausea, as well, although it should be fairly mild if you react as I did. You will definitely sweat very profusely, so be sure to drink plenty of water before going to dinner so you don't dehydrate yourself. It's unpleasant, but it will pass, my dear."

"And what exotic illness am I supposed to have contracted?"

"Febrile contagious magical distemper of the spasmodic type."

"Sounds unpleasant."

"Very. Usually survivable, although it is highly contagious. Poppy will unfortunately have to examine everyone who has been in close contact with you in the last twenty-four hours to maintain the illusion that your illness is genuine. Fortunately, other than your outing this morning, you have spent most of the last day here in your rooms. There is also a treatment for it that calls for some rather exotic ingredients -- not banned, merely rare. "

"How long will I be sick? I don't mean from the potion, although I would like to know that, too, but how long does this illness generally last?"

"Seven to fourteen days, with the contagious period lasting five to ten days. You should feel the worst of the potion's effects for twenty minutes to a half hour. After that, you will feel slightly wobbly for another fifteen or twenty minutes – nothing that can't be cured by a sherbet lemon or two!"

"All right." Minerva sighed. "I can see why you didn't tell Severus about this, although I do think he should be forewarned so he doesn't have a fit in front of the entire school. I will talk to him, reassure him."

"You still have plenty of time for a good nap before Severus returns, my dear."

"Come with me?"

"Will you sleep if I do?"

"Much better than without you," Minerva replied with a smile.

Forty-five minutes later, Severus tapped tentatively on the partially-open door of Minerva's bedroom. He peeked in to see Minerva sound asleep, Albus wrapped around her, his right leg hooked around hers, his right arm thrown across her, his blackened hand resting on a small pillow by Minerva's chest. Neither of them moved, and Severus backed away from the room and went and lay down on Minerva's settee, bending his knees and curling up in order to fit his length on the small sofa. Fifteen minutes later, the soft glow of Albus's Tempus alarm woke the two sleepers.

Minerva stretched and cancelled the Tempus. "Albus? What time is it? Shouldn't Severus be back?"

"Mmm. It's quarter to five. I thought if he returned before we woke, he'd come get you."

Minerva padded in her stocking feet out to the sitting room. "Severus! How long have you been back?"

Severus looked at her with glazed eyes. He was drooling slightly. "M'nerva. M'nerva. Oh, M'nerva." He raised a shaky hand to touch her skirt, then dropped it limply. "M'nerva, m' love," he murmured. "M'nerva, M'nerva."

Minerva sat down beside him, pushing his knees away from his body in order to make some space for herself. She leaned over and embraced the trembling wizard, pulling him to her. "You must not do this to yourself. Why did you not wake me?"

Severus turned his head into Minerva's embrace, and his reply was lost in the folds of her robes. After a moment, he raised an arm and curled it around her, then the other arm. He stroked her back and his trembling began to subside. He kissed the soft skin of her throat and chest. "My love, my sweet love," he whispered, his kisses moving across her upper chest then trailing down toward her breast. "So sweet and wonderful. My love, my true love," he murmured against her skin.

Minerva levered herself into a sitting position, releasing Severus from her embrace. He let her go as she pushed away from him.

"If it weren't for the fact that you are suffering from this spell, Severus Snape, I believe I would shake you. What on earth were you thinking, waiting so long? You were completely incoherent!"

"I saw you were asleep," he said weakly but articulately. "I didn't want to wake you. And . . . Albus was there. I do not belong here, Minerva. I know that. I did not want to wake you and ask you to leave his welcome embrace for my unwelcome one. And I could not lie beside you as I did this morning, not with his arm around you. I may be a bastard, Minerva, and the Adfectus may have a strong hold on me, but I can at least manage that much – to choose to allow you, whom I love so, to sleep in the arms of one whom you love. I am grateful for all you have done and all you continue to do, but, except when I am completely overtaken by the spell, I am aware that you do not love me."

Minerva sighed. "Next time, wake us both, Severus. Let us choose as well, all right? And as I told you before, I do love you, Severus. Just not the way you love me. I am your friend, Severus, and so is Albus. We do not want all of what we have done over the last couple days to be for naught and have you go mad before our eyes!"

Severus nodded and relaxed, looking up at her. "You are very beautiful, Minerva. I could gaze at you all day long and never tire of seeing your beautiful face." He took Minerva's hand and raised it to his lips. "Thank you, Minerva."

Minerva shook her head. "What are we to do with you, Severus Snape? It seems you are as self-destructive now as you are when you are yourself."

"Self-destructive?" he asked, furrowing his brow. "I am selfish and mean, Minerva. Not self-destructive."

"Perhaps you may be somewhat selfish, but you certainly have a knack for choosing to do what is bad for you." She sighed. "Come, now, sit up. We need to talk, then Albus is going to take you on a little tour."

Severus sat up and Minerva shifted to sit beside him.

"Severus, earlier this afternoon, Albus took a dose of the potion that I am to take this evening. As you have seen, he is perfectly fine, and I will be perfectly fine, too. I do not want you to be alarmed when I begin to have the muscle spasms. It will look much worse that it really is, and you have to remember that. And keep in mind that I will be perfectly well in a half hour."

"I will remember that. Albus said that he planned to have me carry you to the infirmary. Is that still what we are going to do?"

"Yes. That way you will be able to care for me. Even though it will all be staged, it will be very gallant of you, and I will feel safer taking the potion knowing you are there and that you will be carrying me to the Hospital Wing."

"All right. I can do that. Could you possibly take the potion early in the meal, though? It will be easier for me to react rationally if I haven't had to wait too long . . ."

"I had planned on that. Albus said I might feel mildly nauseous from the potion, so I think I will have a little bite of something light and mild to eat before we go to dinner, that way I'll have something on my stomach, but nothing that might make me feel sicker. I think this is roast beef and Yorkshire pudding night, too. I do love Yorkshire pudding, but I doubt it would mix well with the potion!"

There was a knock at the door, and the knight came into the landscape that hung above Minerva's fireplace to announce that the student was back. Albus, who had been standing in the bedroom doorway listening to Minerva prepare Severus for her staged illness, said, "I will get it, my dear. I asked Miss Granger to return at five o'clock. It is good to see that she is punctual."