The Emerald City

Arriving at the gates of the Emerald City, Cowardly Lion Ron raced up to them and rang the bell. He hopped back with a squeak when a small, unseen window swung open and a man stuck his head out. It was Cornelius Fudge—complete with lime green bowler hat.

“Who rang that bell?” he growled.

The Cowardly Lion ducked behind Scaregnome Hermione. Harry stepped forward to answer. “We did.”

Fudge glared at him and looked him up and down, giving his lederhosen a contemptuous look. Harry was already embarrassed by the outfit, but he was grateful that Fudge could only see the front and not the back where they were uncomfortably riding up his arse. Fudge sniffed at him. “Can’t you read?”

Harry crossed his arms over his chest. “Why yes, I do happen to be literate.”

“The notice! Didn’t you read the notice?” Fudge sneered at him.

Tin Man Snape huffed and rolled his eyes. “Sir, there is no notice to read.”

“It’s on the door! Right there—” Fudge stuck most of his torso out of the little window and looked down to see the door was bare of any notices. He stuck his head back inside the window and disappeared for a moment. Popping back out, he quickly hung a sign on the door while muttering something about “incompetent workers,” then he disappeared again, shutting the window behind him.

Slightly stunned, the group leaned forward to read the sign, which stated, Bell out of order. Please knock.

“Seemed to be working perfectly fine to me,” Tin Man Snape grumbled.

Harry knocked on the tall door and Fudge instantly reappeared.

“State you business!” he demanded.

Scaregnome Hermione stood tall as she faced the inept doorman. “We wish to see the Wizards.”

Fudge’s eyes bulged slightly. “Nobody gets to see the Wizards! They’re very busy! Very important things to do!”

“Yeah, like test idiotic products on unsuspecting victims,” Harry muttered under his breath.

“This is a matter of much importance. You must let us in to see the Wizards now!” Scaregnome Hermione commanded defiantly, to Cowardly Lion Ron’s great surprise.

Fudge drummed his fingers on the window sill then leaned out the window a little further to look to his left and then to his right. He dropped his voice conspiratorially and whispered, “Well, if you could make a... generous donation”—he raised his eyebrows at them—“I could possibly let you in.”

Tin Man Snape, annoyed with the doorman, was losing his patience. “You must let us in,” he began in a calm voice. “We have been sent by Alba Dumbledore of the North.”

Fudge scoffed at them.

“It’s true. He has the ruby scar,” the scaregnome informed him with a proud grin.

Harry pulled his messy dark fringe off of his forehead to show him the glimmering red lightning bolt. When Fudge eyed him skeptically, Tin Man Snape lifted his axe to lean against his shoulder in a meaningful gesture and cleared his throat.

“Alright, alright!”

Fudge closed the window, and the great doors swung open, permitting them entrance to the Emerald City. The streets were crowded and busy, but everyone looked cheerful. Harry barely recognized most of the people, remembering some as witches and wizards he had seen in passing in Hogsmeade or Diagon Alley. He spotted a few Hogwarts students and even a small Muggle family that lived nearby him on Privet Drive.

A carriage being pulled by a Thestral pulled up to them. The Thestral creeped Harry out more than usual; it was neon purple and seemed to trot with a cheerful bounce. The cabby, none other than Stan Shunpike, nodded at them. “You lot need a ride?”

“Yes, please,” Scaregnome Hermione answered him as they climbed in.

“Where you ‘eaded to?” he asked them.

“Er... well, we need to see the Wizards,” Harry answered.

He eyed Harry warily. “’Choo need to see them for?”

“Alba Dumbledore sent him. Now if you don’t mind, we’d like to be on our way,” Tin Man Snape answered crossly.

“Right then. ’Ow about I take you someplace you can tidy up first?” he offered, looking at Cowardly Lion Ron’s tangled mane. The lion looked away, embarrassed. But when Scaregnome Hermione patted his shoulder comfortingly, he blushed and smiled.

“Okay,” Harry agreed. But before they could take off, the people—including Stan—began singing.

“Ha—ha—ha

That’s how we—”

But everyone abruptly stopped singing when Tin Man Snape stood up in the carriage to loudly inform everyone that he had an axe and was more than inclined to use it. Everyone went back to what they were doing, and Stan took Harry and his crew through Emerald City.

*****

Harry had his hair trimmed, his glasses shined, and his ruby scar polished. Scaregnome Hermione was stuffed with some fresh straw, and Padfoot was given a bath. The workers at the Emerald City parlor were planning on buffing and shining Tin Man Snape, but he complained to the manager about “inappropriate touching of clientele.” Instead, he had his axe sharpened. Cowardly Lion Ron took the longest, as the workers had to remove knots, twigs, and sap from his fur. But they managed and even gave his mane a permanent, although it looked absolutely ridiculous. Eventually, everyone was looking spiffy and clean... or threatening and dangerous, as was Tin Man Snape’s case.

The group left the parlor to find a large crowd gathering in the street. They were staring and pointed to the sky. Above the city, Lucius Malfoy flew on his broom. Shooting out behind him was a trail of smoke spelling out, “S-E-R-E-N-D-E-R H-A-I-R-Y!”

The crowds in the street gasped and pointed, quickly coming up amongst their groups with theories as to why the Wicked Witch of the West would be paying a visit to the Emerald City. Harry frowned at the sky, and Scaregnome Hermione scoffed. “And the doorman thought we were the illiterate ones!”

An Oz-version of Professor Vector looked frantically around at the people in the crowded road. “Hairy? Who’s hairy?” she yelled, questioning no one in particular.

And an Oz-version of a Flourish & Blotts clerk pointed at Cowardly Lion Ron. “He’s rather hairy,” he suggested.

Cowardly Lion Ron patted his perfectly curled mane self-consciously.

Hearing their shouts, and noticing the people gesturing to the lion, Lucius rolled his eyes and began to fly out more letters. “N-O I M-E-E-N T-H-E B-O-Y!”

The people in the streets began searching the crowd for a hairy little boy to hand over to the witch. The witch’s idiocy obviously didn’t diminish his intimidation with the people of the Emerald City.

“T-H-E O-N-E W-I-T-H T-H-E D-A-M-E-D R-O-O-B-I-E S-C-A-R!”

Realizing he was about to be in trouble, Harry ducked out of the crowd and into an alley, followed closely by the rest of his group.

“Wonderful! Now that bloody witch has all of Emerald City after you!” Tin Man Snape kicked the building they were hiding behind, the sound echoing in his hollow tin leg.

“What are we going to do? These people are scared to death of that witch. If they find you, they will surely turn you over to him, Harry!” Scaregnome Hermione was frantic.

“The Wizards!” Cowardly Lion Ron said this with great enthusiasm, making his ginger curls bounce. Padfoot barked in agreement.

“You’re right,” Harry agreed. “We need to get to them now.”

TBC