Chapter Twelve

Disclaimer: Still not mine.

Chapter Twelve

Having spent the previous day analysing and cross-referencing their interactions from the night before, Hermione had woken on Monday morning determined to take matters into her own hands. Or better still, Severus Snape's delightfully average penis. Erect or otherwise.

Tormenting him at breakfast had proven her theory that he was indeed interested, especially when his mouth dropped open in an expression reminiscent of a first year at the Welcome Feast at her parting words. After watching from a discreet corner while he banished his trousers and underwear, she couldn't stop herself following him down to the dungeons. Despite the billow, she knew he was naked and erect under all that fabric, and that thought sustained her for the rest of the day.

Ravenclaws are such bloody pedants! I wish they'd all bugger off and stop asking questions. The lesson was over ten minutes ago, for Merlin's sake! If I don't hurry, he'll be off to the Great Hall for dinner, and I'll have to wait another hour or two.

Finally, the last student reluctantly left the classroom. Possibly Professor Granger's uncharacteristic death glare had helped.

After a mad dash to her quarters to change into something more comfortable – knickers, bra and her robes seemed adequate for the task in hand – Hermione checked her hair in the mirror, gave it up as a bad job, and headed for the dungeons. With any luck, her quarry would still be in residence. If not, she planned to hunt him down after dinner like an owl seeking a midnight snack.

Slipping through Severus's door, Hermione was about to speak when she saw the prey in question. Stark naked in all his pasty, nearly hairless glory, Severus was sprawled on his armchair, eyes closed, one hand slowly stroking his modest erection and the other flung over his head revealing a few straggly armpit hairs.

It was the most arousing sight Hermione had ever seen.

As he reached down to caress his balls and moaned something sounding suspiciously like her name, Hermione walked out of the shadow by the door. Her offer of assistance threw him off his stroke only briefly as his eyelids dropped into what she assumed was his attempt at a sexy smoulder.

The cocky bastard. He thinks he can shock me, does he? Let's see what he thinks of this. The floor was hard under her knees, but the sight of Severus's naked crotch close up was worth it. Toad livers? What is he rabbiting on about? I swear, the man's insane. Realising she had but one way to distract Severus from his newfound obsession with amphibians, Hermione did as she had planned earlier and took matters into hand. His gasp as she touched him intimately for the first time was exhilarating, but the flood of semen down her throat a moment later was somewhat unexpected.

And icky.

Good grief! Whatever happened to, "Bloody hell, 'Mione, I'm gonna come!"? Obviously skipped that class at school. Went to Noncreative Cursing For Beginners instead. And now the wanker's gone to sleep again. He really should ask Poppy about that.

Having gained his attention by dint of a few choice insults, Hermione decided the poor, innocent man needed leading astray. Revealing she wore very little beneath her robes seemed to help, although once again she found herself in plain white. The obvious solution was to cast her remaining garments aside.

"Are you sure?" Severus regained his capacity for speech as Hermione positioned herself on the bed and patted the covers beside her.

"I'm on your bed, naked, inviting you to join me. I'm not planning a game of tiddlywinks."

"Tiddlywinks?"

"You know, where you flip little coloured discs... oh, never mind. Just get your scrawny arse onto this bed before I change my mind."

Severus could move fast when the occasion arose.

"Now what?" He was lying beside her, not allowing any part of their bodies to touch.

You'd think I was planning to shag the bloody Virgin Mary. "Come on, Severus. Loosen up. You must know how this works even if you haven't any practical experience. Kissing, groping, poking, rubbing, thrusting, lots of heavy breathing, and hallelujah. Got it?" What's the matter with him? He seemed to have a pretty good idea what to do a few minutes ago.

Propping himself up on one elbow, Severus did his best to loom. "Of course I know how sexual intercourse works, woman, I was simply trying to ascertain your expectations." His erection prodded her leg as his body turned, leaving a trail of moisture in its wake. "After all, I believe I am one point ahead."

"Oh, shut up and kiss me, you pillock." Hermione grasped his head in both hands and pulled him over her, managing to manoeuvre his hips into a promising position between her thighs.

His kissing had improved markedly since Saturday night; sobriety was infinitely preferable. No longer whiskey-scented and sloppy, his lips opened at to her insistent tongue and allowed her to explore his mouth with impunity, returning the favour as she in turn withdrew. Somehow, his hands had migrated to her nipples, and he was in imminent danger of losing his virginity as he rubbed his eager cock closer and closer...

"For Merlin's sake, Severus, does the word clitoris not ring any bells?" Hermione gave up on her efforts to grind said nub against the shaft of his penis and pulled his hand down between them. "Here, that's the spot. No, not too hard, gently... faster. Oh, yes, who said you weren't a fast learner? Over a bit, now let's try for a little penetration."

Her eyes watered as he thrust his hips in precisely the wrong spot.

"AHH, FUCK! Not there! That'll take a lot more patience and lubrication than your hair trigger will take just yet, love. Move up a little. Right there. Yes!"

"Are you always this bossy in bed, Granger? And what do you mean, hair trig...ahhh, gods, fucking Merlin's saggy tits!"

Apparently, the sensation of a woman's body surrounding his cock was the last straw for Severus's fragile control. As he flopped back onto his side of the bed, Hermione shook her head in fond frustration and prodded his side with an admonitory finger..

"Close, but not quite a pass yet. Watch and learn, Severus." With the expertise of many a night spent alone and one hand flicking a nipple, Hermione's fingers flew over her clitoris, and within moments she was gasping her climax before an astounded and very aroused Severus Snape.

Aroused in mind, at least. His body was a little slow in catching up. His eyes couldn't leave the sight of her extremely slick and swollen sex.

With a wicked grin, Hermione leaned back and parted her thighs once more. "Fancy a taste?"

By midnight, Severus had managed to learn the basics of pleasuring a woman orally and succeeded in a full two minutes of semi-organised thrusting before his mind imploded.

Hermione, on the other hand, had learned the benefits of harnessing Severus's tongue for her own uses and had a jolly good orgasm as a result. She had yet to climax while he was inside her, but his progress was promising in that department. She'd also learned the impressive breadth of his vocabulary of swear words.

"Severus?"

"Go to sleep. I'm knackered."

"Severus?"

"What?"

"I love you."

"I know."

Hermione sat up. "What? How? When?"

Severus opened one eye and managed a smirk. "You called me 'love'." Subject apparently closed, he rolled over.

"Severus?" She couldn't help the plaintive note in her voice.

"Granger, how many people do you know have called me a wanker – more than once – a prat, and a pillock and nearly killed me with allergies, influenza, and alcohol and lived to tell the tale?"

"Er. None?"

"Exactly."

He smiled to himself and waited...

"Oh." Hermione wrapped herself around his body and nestled her head into his shoulder.

"Severus?"

"Yes, love?"

"Do you have any chocolate sauce?"

The End

A/N: This was written for the 2012 SSHG Exchange on LiveJournal. Karelia has done all the beta work. She's the best!