Finally, finally, we get to find out what happened to Gerald -- eventually, anyway, and then -- arrrgghh! Another evil cliffie! I want to echo Alastor's response to Albus:

What the hell did that mean?

Albus, at least, knows she has a secret, if he remembers the letter she wrote when he found about Malcolm (and I've assumed the secret is something about Gerald). I'm guessing Alastor has no idea that there may be something behind her reluctance to talk about Gerald other than her desire not to think about an unpleasant period in her life.



Excellent job with the little details, as usual. I'm pretty sure I've met that (un)Welcome Witch, and it was great to 'see' Kingsley. Alastor continues his slow slide to paranoia (but it's not paranoia if they're really out to get you, is it?). 'Where did I last shag you?'??!? There was nothing else he could ask? He could only get away with that from his almost-death-bed.

"...Ever seen an old Auror? They end up looking like jigsaw puzzles with a couple of pieces gone missing."

I'm blaming you for the Jim Croce songs that won't stop running through my head!

I like the way you contrast the family Christmas in the morning with the afternoon discussion with Albus. I love the way you've developed the relationship between Malcolm and Alastor; it's so nice for him to have a 'dad'. And I enjoyed the walk with Minerva and Alastor (and the cameo by Molly and Arthur), and seeing 'Professor McGonagall' emerge when she was hit by the snowball, only to see Alastor defuse the situation and use the opportunity to do some teaching of his own. Minerva has finally begun to allow herself to trust and open up to someone, and is finally experiencing some happiness. (Fluff!)



Meanwhile, Albus is as emotionally isolated as Minerva ever was, but his isolation is by conscious choice -- and he is fighting very hard to keep it. He keeps saying he 'cannot' -- cannot be a father, cannot love Malcolm; but it seems more to be that he 'will not' allow himself to even try. He hasn't given himself time to even get used to having a son. It seems to be more that he is afraid to be a father, or to love anyone, probably for fear of hurting and being hurt, since his previous experience was so disastrous. His words and actions seem to be in conflict, though. He denies that he can be a father, then says Malcolm is his responsibility, that he doesn't want to add him to his list of regrets, calls him 'our son' and wants to know if he is happy and if he gets along with Alastor.



And yet--if I had to pick one thing out of Minerva's conversation with Albus, it is the depth and strength of the emotional connection between these two people who have such difficulty making emotional connections. Certainly it can withstand her 'other' secret, especially if it's anything like I suspect. It is ironic that he says he can no longer trust her now, when she's decided to tell him everything (eventually). I think that's hurt and anger talking though, because what they really said, is how important they are to each other.

"You could have come to me, Minerva. ... I would have helped you both. I think that is what hurts the most. That you didn't trust me."



" . . . and he is your son, which makes him dear to me. But I don't love him . . . as a father. I cannot.



"No. I cannot pretend that I didn't consider sending you both away. But I found that contemplating that was more painful than the idea of seeing you both every day. You are very important to me, Minerva. Perhaps more than I realised."



... She wasn't ready to tell him the rest of it, although she would, in time. And then, she thought, she might lose
him forever. But she didn't think she could bear it just yet.



Albus laughed—and she thought she'd never heard a more beautiful sound.

Awwwww.

Love the way Minerva managed to help him overcome his paranoia with love and acceptance.

Finally! YAY! Woo Hoo!  So glad that Alastor's stubborn pride has finally gone the way of the Dodo and he can relax and love the woman that he loves. And glad that Minerva is so gracious and loving toward him.I want to write more but I have little time.

Good for Minerva, actually allowing someone to get close to her, even if she's still wary of real emotional intimacy, and Malcolm is just as I'd expect. It would be terribly awkward for her to explain to Malcolm that she and Alastor would be going away for a week together, but he'd probably just widen his eyes and blush. I liked this interchange:

Just . . . be kind to her. She deserves a little kindness," said Malcolm.

"Aye. She does at that. And I'll do my best," answered Alastor earnestly.

And I still love Elgar and the ginger-lemon curd. Has Albus tried it?

*snip*Alastor seemed to be in perpetual need of a new partner. None of the other senior Aurors wanted to work with him anymore. Too rigid, they complained. Always trying to take control, insisting everything be done exactly by the book when everyone knew that the best Aurors took the rules more as guidelines that could be discarded when the situation called for it. Well, bugger them. Lazy, that’s what they were, always wanting to take shortcuts. Alastor would take a new Auror anytime. Gave him a chance to train ‘em right, and they needed it, now that Amelia Bones had been bumped upstairs to be Deputy to the Head of Magical Law Enforcement. Since she’d left the training programme, the quality of recruits had taken a definite nosedive, in Alastor’s not-so-humble opinion.*snip*I just love this, for so many reasons, but especially because Alastor does not waver in his sense of justice and loyalty, AND that Amelia did well for herself! Woo Hoo!

du-du-dun!!!

Whoa. Crap.Alastor really lost it this time, didn't he?  I thought it might be Walden when Alastor thought he looked liked Gerald's wedding pictures -- that was thirty years ago, and Walden is quite a few years younger than Gerald. I didn't think Gerald was that good with his wand, either. With all the pain, and adrenalin, and the shock of thinking he's seeing Gerald (his nightmares) after all this time, I can see how he might have trouble controlling himself, but this... !!  I can't wait to see the fallout this time.

Excellent chapter.  Minerva having self esteem issues and Alastor telling her that she is quite remarkable was very sweet.  Glad to see that Malcolm is settling  in nicely and Minerva has Amelia as a  friend to spend sometime with. I am curious as to how her relationship with Albus will change if it indeed does and what will bring it on. 

How nice to see Minerva settling in and making actual friends, and to see that Malcolm is fitting in too, even if his mum is Professor McGonagall.

"Don't you think it's time you moved on? It wouldn't mean you didn't still care for Gerald, Minerva. It would just mean you've accepted that he's not coming back."

What a shame that she can't trust even her best friend with the knowledge that Gerald's disappearance was a relief, not a tragedy. Her thoughts later about Albus indicate to me that he is still the only person she would trust with her emotions, but of course her guilt prevents that.

Enter Alastor Moody, and Minerva has a chance to have a real, adult relationship with someone who isn't insane. Will wonders never cease?

She gave a half-laugh, saying, "Me? I'm just a schoolteacher. I haven't even done any really interesting research."
...
"No—I mean, yes, some of them, probably—but I think there are quite a few people who just don't think I'm worth the effort. I'm just a schoolteacher . . . and a woman."

Interesting to see how much of her self-image and self-esteem are bound up in her job. No wonder she has issues with trust, if she doesn't appreciate what a special and unique person she is. Well, she spent her childhood with Magnus McGonagall, and then she married into the Macnairs, so I see why she thinks that way (or thinks others think that way), especially about being a woman, but I suspect that most of the people she meets now don't agree with that at all.

Woohoo! An update!I loved seeing the order meeting (and Alastor and Minerva's 'discussion') from Molly's POV, and it was good to see her reasons for joining the order. Was Crispian Goyle, who murdered Ginny's namesake the same Goyle that was part of the gang that attacked Malcolm on the Hogwart's Express? It was also a bit amusing to see Minerva from Molly's perspective too, to see her beginning to see her as a person apart from 'Professor McGonagall'.

“Lover?” Professor McGonagall sounded amused.So the rumours are true, Molly thought. She wasn’t surprised in the least, but it gave her an odd feeling in the pit of her belly to hear Professor McGonagall say it just like that.

And she had to notice that her temper isn't quite as volatile 'in real life' as it is in class. I have friends who teach, and it's always fun to listen to how hard it is for them to keep from laughing while they're 'losing their temper' in class.I don't know what Alastor was thinking though. He's got to know by now that he can't forbid Minerva to do anything, and that there's no quicker way to put her back up than to try.I enjoyed seeing Albus and Minerva interact as friends, without any looming revelations or tensions, and I think we can see a bit of why he was so calm and quiet when Minerva was revealing what happened to Gerald -- he already knew, and he was far more interested in Alastor's reaction than anything else. He's bound to be right that she wouldn't be calm about his using legilimency on her without permission, too. I did like seeing how important her happiness still is to him. It is a bit sad to see her relationship with Alastor imploding, (even though I'm a die-hard ADMM fan) but they have to have been apart for a number of years before GoF, so it's got to happen fairly soon.

Malcolm and Albus finally meet--and they are both oblivious to Minerva sweating bullets (or whatever the wizarding equivalent would be). That was really well done. She's right when she thinks about it later though, Albus isn't looking for it, so he won't notice a resemblance, even if Malcolm does seem oddly familiar. I wonder how many people will meet Malcolm that know Albus, but won't see how alike they are. The staff, Griselda and Bathilda, anyone else?

I really like the dynamic between Minerva and Malcolm. Malcolm is really a geek, isn't he? (That's a good thing!) He can even surprise Minerva with it: history texts and obscure transfiguration journals.

We see a little bit about how Albus and Minerva's relationship has grown; they seem to see each other more as equals and friends than teacher-student or boss-employee. The licorice spiders for Halloween was a nice touch. I enjoy seeing them interact, even though she can never truly relax around him. And of course he picks up that she is a little more tense than usual!

*snip*When Minerva had shown them the memory, Albus had been reassured by Alastor’s reaction, but now it seemed that like many secrets, the ones Minerva had kept had worked like a Dark and subtle philtre, slowly poisoning her relationship with Moody.He felt unutterably sad for both of them.“Alastor is not afraid of you, Minerva,” he said.“No,” she said. “He’s afraid of himself.”Yes, Albus thought, with some surprise. That’s it precisely.*snip*Oooh .... foreshadowing of doom .... well done Madam .... and why am I not surprised? *chuckles sadly*

Moody said, “Yes, damn it. And doesn’t that give me some right to ask you not to do this?”“Yes,” she said, so quietly that Molly almost missed it. “You have the right to ask, Alastor. You always have that right.”“And you have the right to disregard it, is that what you’re saying?”“Not to disregard it, no.*snip*Our dear Minerva is sounding more and more like her esteamed boss the longer we write them both! *winks* I looooove eeeet!

Ok Seriously?  "Albus said, "There's something about him . . . I can't quite put my finger on it . . . but there's something familiar about him. As if I've met him before. Ah, well . . . I suppose he simply reminds me of you as a girl."   Gee I wonder how long it will take before it dawns on him that he resembles himself?  I like that they seem to be quite comfortable with one another already.  So looking forward to the next chapter.

I'm glad Gerald finally stood up against his father.. But I also have a dreadful feeling that things will not end well for him..

The look inside Kenneth Macnair's head is fascinating. Like watching a rattlesnake can be fascinating.

They always jacked up the price after you'd put someone in St Mungo's.

How dare they, the price gougers!

Of course, that hadn't helped his father, but really, the man was hardly careful, was he? Absolutely no control of himself, he'd had, Kenneth thought with a sneer. ... Arranging things for Finn had cost him dearly, and there was money he'd never see again.

His concern for his father and brother is so... touching.

By the time Gerald had been a year old, Heloise had already had the first two of her many miscarriages.

This last, coupled with Stirling, the house elf's, thoughts the day after Minerva's wedding, about getting Pixar to brew potions that are good for bruises, because Mistress will need them since Master is so excited, gives an absolutely chilling look into the elder Macnair's marriage, and doesn't bode well for Minerva's future, whether or not she remains in that house.

Heloise said she had some shopping to do in London and took to her rooms to freshen up and to fortify herself for the purpose with a potion or two, no doubt.

So that's how she copes. I really can't blame her at all.

One last thought from Kenneth:

The bitch pulled her wand on me!

Really? How dare she! Did I say rattlesnake? I think I meant boa constrictor. At least venom is a little more merciful. Kenneth just slowly sqeezes the life out of his victims.

Minerva is just magnificent here, and you can see how very desperate she was, to actually manage the transformation and escape. It's very wise of her not to return to the house for any reason, and the way she takes care of Malcolm (and his responses, 'no nappy!') are very engaging, and really highlight her resourcefulness and independence, and show a little of her relationship with her son.

I do wonder what Minerva told Griselda about her transformation. I think she would have to tell her something, but she's much too private and reserved to tell her the whole story.

This is a really interesting story. I don't usually read stories that have Minerva McGonagall as the central character, but you have done a really find job of putting together some interesting plot lines and characters. It is very finely written. On pins and needles now to see what happens next!

lovely

oh cliffy!!!  you rat!

I wish it were that easy for Minerva and Malcolm to escape, but I am guessing it won't be. I wonder how she'll manage it. Still enjoying very much!

*snip*Everything's going pear-shaped. Why is everything going pear-shaped? he thought, looking at his papers and charting the steady decline of his investment income.I thought that line was brilliant in showing just how Ken's mind works - his desire for control, his expectance of HIS control, his entitlement to control, so powerful. Well done, Squibby.That said - you portray McNair Senior very well as the worst sort of waste of skin this planet has to offer - well done again - we hate him, oh how we hate him.Still more horrors to Minerva... if I didn't know you better, I'd think you really had it in for her with this yarn - what a miserable existance... what hell to live in.And Malcolm - oh that sweet, precious child... how I adored seeing him squeeling with glee as his mother and he flew high on that broom, flew to safety - and praises to you for writing McGonagall Senior as a protective and vengeful father - thank Heaven for that. What a relief...But somehow, I know there is more horror to come... more trials for Minerva and sweet Malcolm to endure... *sighs*Your writing, as usual, is brilliant - I'm always in awe at how well you know your subjects - the way you explain - in character, the money systems in place, Muggle or Magical - is just another testiment at your grasp of how the world works.Oh how I loved how Minerva's magical reflexes kicked in - *grins* Such a wonderful idea! Its just too bad she didn't transform into a lion and eat him... ahh well - might be too climactic so early on in the story, eh?Bravo my dear.

 Kenneth Macnair what an utter b*stard! Good old minerva giving him what for! I hope he catches a dose of cupids measles from some Knockturn alley strumpet! great chapter.

*snip*Later, Minerva would marvel at the quickness of Severus’s mind in following Alastor to the castle*snip*I don't quite understand this and its got my interest ... care to embellish for those of dimmer wit? 

I get a sense of Minerva's emotional and intellectual isolation here, especially when you contrast her life at the Macnairs against Bathilda and Griselda's relationship. I wonder if she's ever really felt that she fit in anywhere, other than perhaps with Albus. It's good that she has Malcolm, even if ten-month-olds aren't the greatest conversationalists. Then again, considering his parents, she could probably start discussing transfiguration theory with him pretty soon now, and get intelligent answers.

I have to think it's pretty naive of her to think that Kenneth would allow her to just move out, whether or not Gerald went along with her, and it seems to me that he is the one that matters. Gerald is no doubt financially dependent despite the marriage settlement, and I get the impression that he is well and truly under Daddy's thumb anyway. I also think that Kenneth regards Minerva as both a prize and a challenge. He'd probably love to break her any way he could, and he'd lose that opportunity if she/they left.

I thought this was brilliant:
"Even lunatics have family," said Bathilda, which effectively reminded Minerva to shut her mouth.
Yes, no doubt living with the Macnairs gives her all kinds of insights into family lunatics.