Part V: A More Serious Interlude
Chapter 5 of 12
averygoodunIt can't all be fun and games...
ReviewedPart V: A More Serious Interlude
“Hey, Your Royal Muddness,” a voice drawled across the hall, making Hermione shake her head.
“What’s up, my dear ferrethead?” she cooed sweetly, seeing Snape behind him a ways.
Malfoy snarled slightly, but decided a smirk would look better. “So tell us, how does it feel to be Snape’s tart?”
She saw Snape’s face contort, but with a tilt of her head, he stayed back.
“Why, interested in the job, Malfoy?” she replied smoothly, walking up to him seductively. “Can’t say, as I don’t hold that title, but shall I pass on your resume?”
Snape chose that moment to appear.
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“What is going on here?” Snape asked disdainfully, not focusing on anyone.
“Granger here’s been insulting you behind your back, sir. I would watch out.”
Snape raised his eyebrow at Hermione, and she suddenly wondered if she had insulted him.
“Any insult I’ve handed out was aimed at Malfoy, sir,” she said, regretting the “sir” instantly. A chorus of sniggers came from the Slytherins as many of them shot leering looks at her. Snape quelled them with a single glare, giving Hermione a dose as well.
“Your advice is sound, Draco. I would watch out,” he said, then strode off.
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That night Hermione waited anxiously for Snape to arrive. As time passed, she grew more concerned that he had been insulted by her thoughtlessness. After nearly an hour of waiting, she gave up and set out to find him, needing to apologize. He didn’t answer his office door.
Wandering about the dungeons, she couldn’t see any sign of life. She had just given up on finding him when she heard shuffling footsteps coming her way. Some instinct pushed her to hide behind a statue, for which she was grateful, as she watched Draco floating an unconscious Snape through the dungeons.
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Hermione rushed out, disregarding Draco’s blood stained robes.
“Is he alright?” she asked.
“Granger! What the hell are you doing here?”
“What happened?” she pressed, ignoring his question.
“It’s none of your business, and if you know what’s good for you, you’ll disappear right now,” he snarled.
“Cut the menace, Malfoy. You’re injured, and Snape’s unconscious. Tell me what happened, and I’ll help you out.”
Draco looked at her assessingly, then sighed. “Fine, but not here. We need to get him to his chambers.”
Once he had carefully placed Snape on his bed, Draco turned, giving Hermione a vicious smile.
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“Worried are we?” he said. “He must be good if he’s convinced a Mudblood to care.” Hermione scrunched her brow, confused. “What, don’t understand?” Draco continued. “Little Miss Know-It-All doesn’t know a Death Eater when she sees one?”
Hermione scowled at him, thinking fast. “Don’t be silly, Malfoy. Dumbledore would never--”
“Dumbledore is a fool,” he spat, then raised his wand at her. “Dumbledore thinks Snape’s reformed, that he regrets his past. His robes might not show it tonight, but Snape revels in killing Mug-”
A stupefy cut short his rant. Hermione turned to see the headmaster at the hearth.
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Not questioning his presence, Hermione began, “Professor Snape’s been injured, sir.”
“I gathered,” was his terse reply as he made his way to the bedroom. Hermione followed Dumbledore, eager to help if possible. When she entered the bedroom, Dumbledore was trying to coax Snape’s unconscious body to drink a potion. After he had laid his form back down, he gave Hermione a piercing look.
“Why are you down here, Miss Granger?”
“He stood me up, sir,” Hermione answered nervously. She was relieved when his twinkle returned.
“Would you mind looking after him while I attend to some things?” he asked.
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After a couple of hours watching Snape’s motionless form, Hermione wondered if Dumbledore would ever return. She was just about to leave when a grunt from the bed turned her around.
“Professor Snape?” she queried.
“Unh,” he replied, screwing his eyes shut more tightly.
“Professor Snape, sir,” she said again.
“Uhhgg,” was all he managed, this time accompanied by a pained head toss. Worried, she leaned in to feel his forehead for fever, but the instant her hand touched his skin, his eyes shot open, and his hand gripped her arm tightly.
“Miss Granger! What do you think you’re doing?”
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She backed off quickly as far as she could with him still holding her arm.
“I was just checking you for fever, sir.”
“What are you doing here at all?” he snapped, clearly incensed.
“Professor Dumbledore asked me to watch over you until he returned,” she said nervously.
He grunted unpleasantly but let go of her arm. When she lifted her hand to touch him, though, he eyed her sharply.
“It’s to find out if you need another potion, sir,” she explained.
Reluctantly, he nodded, allowing her palm to press against his head. She sighed, relieved no fever was evident.
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Another hour passed before Dumbledore showed up. Snape and Hermione immediately mistrusted the twinkle in his eye.
“Am I interrupting anything?” he asked jovially as he entered the room. The pair glared at him, annoyed at the implication. Dumbledore held up his hands in a pacifying gesture. “I only ask because of your scheduled date.” Hermione looked at the clock, then at the headmaster suspiciously.
“I believe the headmaster just pointed out that this could qualify as a date,” she said. Snape looked at her, then distastefully at Dumbledore who promptly turned his back, beard twitching. An uncomfortable kiss ensued.
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On her way out, Hermione noticed Draco’s form still sprawled on the floor.
“Sir,” she asked Dumbledore, “what about Malfoy?”
“When he wakes up, I’ll tell him I hexed him to stop him from saying too much,” Snape answered. “I wouldn’t want to scare off Circe’s granddaughter, now would I?” He quirked his lips in an almost friendly way.
“Of course not, sir,” she said as she smiled back. Her smile faded, though, as she thought about Draco and his chosen path. “I don’t suppose Draco’s faking his allegiance?” she asked.
The somber look on two faces was answer enough.
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AN: Next up - A declaration goes awry, and Circe decides to step in - again.
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Latest 25 Reviews for 25 Dates
185 Reviews | 6.54/10 Average
Wonderfully fluffy! Even fluffier than marshmallow fluff!
Missy/LovesRickman
Lol loved the perverse pun with pig latin. Excellent ending for Snake Face
Missy/LovesRickman
This story was wonderfully entertaining and fun. I truly enjoyed it. You gave me 3 wonderful nights of wine and reading a lovely, amusing story about my favorite couple before bed. Well done!!!!! Good night, dearest AG.
With Circe for her grandmother, does that still qualify Hermione as a "mudblood"? I know her parents are muggles but her blood is bluer than his! Can he still call her that? Isn't her dad more like a sqib? That would make her a half blood wouldn't it?
I second my 2011 review. My cat doen't want me to type more.
What fun!!!! I've read it years ago and remember Hermione gets fixed up with Snape by Circe and that's it. Not because it isn't a memorable story, mind. It's because I have no short term memory. I do remember being 18 months old and my brother being brought home from the hospital. Seriously. I'm terrified I have early dementia. But it won't make it better to stress about it, so I'm off to the next chapter.
Thanks for that funny story!
Hahahahaha, loved how Hermione & Severus looked for the opportunity in their predicament! ;)
This was a fun sounding challenge, and you did a great job with it! Loved this story! :)
Bravo! Quite enjoayable piece of romantic fluffy wuffy. I love romantic fluffy wuffy!
Not as smart as one would expect of Snapeypoo! Not to be a nag, but does he not realize whom he is trying to best? I bet Albus will play along alright. If I know him he'll tell Severus he's been in love with him too and just didn't think Snapeypoo would ever return his feelings, that's what! I've no idea what she'll do to Hermione. She has shamelessly embarrassed the girl. If Hermione really is the smartest witch of her age she'll apologize and explaine that she was just embarrassed, then thank her for getting Snapeypoo to fall for her.
Apparently, they forgot who they are dealing with and have grossly underestimated their adversary. Cheeky! The powerful witch and wizard are just a little bit too impressed with themselves. I imagine they will find out one shouldn't toy with goddesses.
So much for Harry's Bilboish speach. I was thinking that Snape would be rather stinky and not very kissable after so much time in a dungeon but then I remembered cleansing charms. That was a close one. I was about to be icked out by a Snapeypoo- Hermione kiss. That was the whole point of the story! I hope Aragog and his spawn actually ate the swine. Do spiders poop? Could Volde come back to life from magical spider poop? Let's hope not.
Circe's Big Bra on a Centaur!! Pa-leez! Must you embarrass the girl so heartlessly? Give her a break and tell her about Snapypoo in private, could you?
Admittedly, Snapypoo did deserve to be left at the Malfoy's. But I expect you to deliver him in good health to Hermione when he's learned his lesson.
Circe's pink knickers! 'Bout time she stepped in! I hope she addresses the problem with Ferretbutt, as well.
I don't see why Snape would be offended by Hermione taking Ferrethead down a notch, implying he wanted to be Snape's tart. She in no way insinuated that Snape would be open to the idea. I thought it was brilliant! Too bad about Malfoy. I hope he has a change of heart and chooses the light. You'd think he'd at least be afraid of insulting Circe's grand daughter. I hope Circe has been paying attention to the little ferrethole.
How do Circe and Dumbledore expect things to progress in a romantic way when the couple have promised not to cross the Student-Teacher line? It's time for Dumbledore to let Severus know that as long as he is descrete the Headmaster would turn a blind eye should feelings develope between Severus and Hermione. Otherwise, it's time Circe laid down some more laws and told Dumbledore to give Severus permission to court Hermione if he so desires.
Circe's Ass!
What is the problem with those Slytherin twits? Worried Hermione out ranks them? Mwaaahaaahaaa!
Sweet Circe!
Bwahahaha! I LOVE this story! Transfiguring Dumbledore into a boar! Definitely a boar and not a bore! Snapey's undies must be in a bunch!!!
ROTFLMHO! That is one of the funniest Severus/Hermione fics I've ever read. After a "grumpy" day, this brought a smile to my face and had my family looking at me like I was crazy for laughing so much and so loud. I don't think the skimming in the last chapter was a problem at all... with the style of the fic, it worked perfectly!
Very enjoyable and pleasingly in character. Altogether believable.
very good!
Meddling old biddies LOL