The Truth
ladyofthemasque54 Reviews | 7.48/10 (54 Ratings, 0 Likes, 125 Favorites )
Severus is hit by a spell, and The Truth is revealed. Vigorously. (I blame the Potter Place Winter Challenge #22 plot-bunny for the bite-marks on my keyboard.)
Start ReadingChapters (1)
About ladyofthemasque
Author
ladyofthemasque
Member Since 2005 | 37 Stories | Favorited by 1,485 | 368 Reviews Written | 1,311 Review Responses
I have to apologize to everyone, period. Real life swallowed me whole, as I have been struggling to make a living writing original fiction over the last 8 years. It has not been easy, & has been complicated by health issues. I hope people can forgive my long silences. Trying to make enough money to live on from writing is a lot harder--waaaay harder--than it looks. (At least I didn't leave any posted fanfics unfinished.)
Anyhoo...
These stories are works of parody (& thus are allowable under US law), and are not written for profit. Just for fun. I'm not making any money off of any fanfics, nor will I ever. I'm just playing around in other writers' universes.
...I am, however, making something of a living off my own stories. (If anyone wants to play around in my universes, you may visit my website, www.jeanjohnson.net, and look up my policy on Fanfics & Fanarts. It's reasonable enough and fairly easy to follow, too...)
~Lotm
Reviews for The Truth
I am so gullible! I thought nearly all the way through that Severus was actually married to someone else. If he had been, it would have taken more than one chapter to set this all to rights though. Fun story.
Found a couple of mistakes. You wrote: " ... The only things he could do were to bit his lip to keep [you need to add an 'e' to bit.]
And : "...righting those books, Madam Librarian?” he added tartly, flicking his want to tidy several scrolls." [Severus needs to flick his wand, not want.]
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Meh, I didn't run it past my betas, so I'm not surprised...~Lotm
Okay.Well.That's just crazy. Very crazy.But good crazy ;-) I like it!Sincerely,eirene
Yay! A plot bunny from Lotm! (Even if said bunny did look a little too smug there at the end.)
I confess to going from initially assuming it was Hermione to a few seconds of doubt when he confronted her. Very well done - just enough misdirection for some of us to go "what???"
Not that I'd expect anything less than very well done from you, my lady.
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
*curtsies*~Lotm
Squee! Fabulous plot bunny, fabulous response to the gauntlet it threw by chewing your keyboard. ;o)
I shall admit that I didn't allow myself to be misdirected by mentions of Mrs Snape, not when there was a question of what would possess the man to marry without desiring to do so ... Which made Hermione Mrs Snape as soon as she was revealed as the target of the spell. ~woots and waves Good Ship flag~ Severus and Hermione were both endearing under the effects of their respective spells.
And now it's time for the question: what was the spell's name based on? Obviously I know what amant(a) by itself means, and with the lettering slightly different, the romanian pronounciation would translate to 'you're my lover' ... But I've been trying to puzzle out what you combined it with to produce that spell.
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
amant = loveramet,i = to make giddy, intoxicated. (comma equals a cedilla on the t, since this thingy doesn't have romaneste characters available for posting)And yes, I got them out of the book you, you darling woman, sent to me! *hugs, snickers* And now I have another language dictionary I can use to cobble together "magical spellwords"!*hugs again*~Lotmdarth ada's response:
Aaaaah I see. I had been wrecking my brains ... I got the pronounciation, but I had't thought of borrowing the last letter of 'amant(a)' (as amanta = feminine lover) as the first letter for 'ameti'. Sneaky of you to get that extra 's' in, of course, as I started thinking literally instead of aurally.
~hugs~ I had my suspicions! It's fantastic that you're getting good use out of it, my dear! If it pokes you into unleashing more plot bunnies onto your adoring friends and fans, so much the better!
~huggles~
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Of course it was sneaky of me. *strikes dramatic musclewoman pose* I am The Author, and I am Gooooood! *snerks*I do tend to do that, overlap the words where convenient, and bastardize them where expedient. Veritamoria, for example, could be broken down crudely into Verita (truth) and moria (death), or Verita (truth) and amoria (love). (Even though the actual Latin words are a wee bit different...which is where I bastardized 'em.) Since in FSS it was the "True Love Potion", obviously it has some overlap in the vowels between veritas et amore.And in this case, the (a) feminine ending was not actually being used; the spell would genderlessly affect anyone it struck. Heck, if it had struck Gilderoy, he would've spent hours snogging his portraits, his reflection, his own self--what he could reach of himself, that is...or maybe he'd grab a doppleshell or a jar of dopplefoam and recreated himself long enough for some autoerotic lurvemaking...and I just hurt my brain trying not to think about that...owie...Okay, back to the chocolate. That's always good to think about. White chocolate with truffle layers, eh? Sounds good to me!~Lotm
Hippity hop, hippity hop! The plot bunny has run amock!Great story and... I want to try that darn hex/charm! (With SS not too far away, mind you.) 
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Yeah, but what if he's not your true love? That's the inherent danger in this spell...~Lotm
Response from mmesnape (Reviewer)
.... Ok, ok, have Lucius stay close by too! Teehee! Cheers!
That was hilarious. My goodness, it even made me blush.
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Teehee, score!!*hugs*~Lotm
so cute
Truly wonderful, lovely, sexy smut! Thank you LOTM! What a way to make my day!
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
You're welcome, Lyndie!~Lotm
Well, of course they were married. I thought it was obvious from this:
"Mr. Snape was just a terror, twenty-four/seven. Mrs. Snape, when riled, was an unholy terror."
Certainly not Pince! Lovely story. The boys were appropriately idiotic and singing!Severus is a delight!
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
I know; I don't get why people are scared of Snape. When you're terrifying 24/7, your victims eventually get used to it. Hermione, on the other hand, always comes across as polite, sweet, and bossy...and it's that lattermost one you have to watch out for, since when she lets fly with her temper--*WHACK*--the ferret gets it!*snickers*~Lotm
For a long moment there, you had me thinking that Severus was married to Pince. Unusual to have Hermione be the anti PDA of the couple... and to have Harry's vocabulary containing cerebral pustule!Singing!Severus was priceless. Love-hexed!Severus in general is priceless too! Just the thing to start my day at the end of the week containing my exams.There are worse things than plot bunnies to tamper with keyboards- at least they can't crawl under them like spiders can!
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Hey, even Harry can admit it when Severus comes up with a particularly good insult...and plagiarize it...And thank you so very much--not--for creeping me out with that last image. Lalalalalalalalalalaaaa...~Lotm(off to bug-spray her desk now, dammit)
Response from ayerf (Reviewer)
Severus does come up with the best insults.Sorry about that last image! But it actually happened to me this morning. And I'm arachnophobic...
OMG! You had me scared there for a bit that he was married to someone OTHER than Hermione. Wonderful one-shot. Thank you for writing!
Oh, very cute and enjoyable. :D I had very brief points where I wasn't certain that Severus was actually married to Hermione, although I was hoping. ;) Thank you for sharing!
WARNING: It doen't work unless you're magical!I read the story.I made my husband read the story.We tried it. I'm a tall thin woman and there is not enough surface area to write words and/or phrases with love bites. Exclamation points really don't work out well either.....had fun trying....It's nice to see that you are back. Fun story...probably more for me (we really did try).
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Well, of course it only works if you're magical! Good heavens, I'm well aware that there's no way to shape the letters properly, without using some sort of vacuum-cleaner system with alphabet-shaped attachments for the suction-tip! (Um...disclaimer...don't try this at home, kids!) Nope, it's clearly magical...though I'm surprised, tickled, amazed, and dumbfounded that you and your hubby tried!...Erm...not to be too prurient or anything, but...did you enjoy your attempt, at least? *attempted innocent look*~Lotmwho just wants her readers to be happy, really...*innocent whistling*
Response from oscarxena (Reviewer)
FYI, exclamation points turn out better the following day if done correctly. After extensive research I am happy to say that everything came out with satisfacory results!After 21 years of marriage it's nice to still date once in a while.....
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Woot! *squeeenvy moment* Very glad for you, wistful for me...*sigh**hugs* But mostly happy for you!~Lotm
Hahaha... that was great!!
I was worried for a moment when Hermione said that Severus was already married and she wouldn't be a hallway whore, but I knew you wouldn't disappoint us that way!
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Heehee...yeah, that was fun. You see, to her, she didn't have to say the "married...to me" part, because it was blatantly obvious to her that he was already married to her, of all people. Which made it fun to write it that way!~Lotmtricksy writer, teeheehee
Response from CharmedForce (Reviewer)
lol... The trick worked quite well. Good job again!
I love it - Excellent work!! 
I loved it.
You had me fooled there that he was married to someone else, although the description of the librarian had me wondering. Very clever. Quite rambunctious and thoroughly satisfying shagging, er love making.
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Well, everyone writes fanon!Hermione to be this petite little child with tiny hands and other pedophilic tendencies! *makes face* Why should I do that, too? Why can't she grow up to be tall, slender, and NORMAL-sized? (which covers a very large range, actually) Yes, it's a pet peeve of mine, and yes, this was one of my answers to it...and yes, it was hawt, smutty, and carefully phrased to take ruthless advantage of the fanon!Hermione "petiteness" bull-fertilizer.Muahahah, and you fell for it! *cheeky wink* Glad you liked it so much!~Lotm
"cerebral pustule"-- man I love your word choice...
"Public displays of affection were an oxymoron."-- *sporfle*
"that he was feeling more than a little turned on by the thought of someone watching them"-- ooo, a heretofore undiscovered kink! *wicked grin* love it!
"Worthy of gutting, skinning, and taxidermically mounting one Ronald Bilius Weasley--preferably whilst still alive--as a monument to Wand-Wielded Utter Stupidity"-- LOL!! I love the imagery...
"size of a disreputable radish"-- are there reputable radishes? Are the one Luna wears reputable or not? *cringes at the images in head now*
"You did pass out before the compulsion was through with humiliating me."--AWWWWWW!!!
"the rotund little gossip-monger"-- *falls over laughing* I can just HEAR Snape saying that!
"When their thighs were on speaking terms once again."-- ROFLMAO!!!!!
As for Snape telling Ron about the *cough* results of his spell... *cackles* I think that'd be the BEST deterrent yet! ;)
FAR too much fun for my own good, darlin. *hugs*
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
HAH! Got you back for all the delight and pleasure you've given me with PoH!...Speaking of which, shouldn't you be 
-ing right about now?? *Cracks whip over yer butt!*~Lotm
Hee!Well done, LOtM. I'd write more, but I seem to have this urgent need to ... um ... show my Leading Man how I really feel.Much love,mmyrtle (from LJ)
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Woot!~LotmP.S. I am not responsible for anything that happens out of said showing-the-leading-man-how-you-really-feel-ness. Especially not if it finishes happening nine and a half months from now...
Response from Moaning Myrtle (Reviewer)
*snerk*Thankfully, that risk has been rendered surgically impossible highly unlikely.Of course, at our age (me and Leading Man's), if the impossible did happen, we'd wind up giving birth to our own grandchildren...
Response from Moaning Myrtle (Reviewer)
*snerk*Thankfully, that risk has been rendered surgically impossible highly unlikely.Of course, at our age (me and Leading Man's), if the impossible did happen, we'd wind up giving birth to our own grandchildren...
Apothecary in Pago Pago? Sounds oddly familiar ... ;-)
This was utterly hysterical. Plot bunnies are dangerous things, indeed!
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Yeah, I ripped that outta some other fanfic, by what's-her-name, that hack who can't stop writing godawfully long fanfics. Silly cow. Thinks she'll get noticed by some big publishing house if she just writes on and on and on, enough...Oh, wait that was me. Silly kitty, rather. (I'm not the least bit cow-like, though I am silly, NAAAARF!)~Lotm
Yay!!! You're back in the land of the living HP writers!!!I thought those Nightfall boys were keeping you to themselves. Not that that's a bad thing...*pulls foot out of mouth*Squee!!! *bouncebouncebouncebouncebounce*-=Liz=-
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
*rises from the dead, looking all icky and in seriously need of either a shower or an exorcism...NOT!!*Hey, I wasn't dead; I was just busy!~Lotmthe Queen of Squick's response: yes, I know. You have eight brothers to tame. Tame away. m'Lady!
'Now, if you had sought to play Stern Professor and Naughty Student in either of your offices, or in the Potions classroom or the Library...'This part made me giggle so much.I love the whole 'over the top-ness' as you put it, too. As strange as it is to read Snape being all gushy and romantic, it works.*wonders off with a smile on her face*
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Well, if you're gonna go for broke, go for busted, smashed, splintered, shredded, mangled, mushed, and mashed!~Lotm
Squee! New fic from the LOTM! Any fic by you is lovely.
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Thank you!~Lotm
Hurrah! That was brilliant! At first I was a little worried about the maybe-non-con, but then I thought "Duh!", Severus couldn't possibly be married to anyone but Hermione. 
Response from ladyofthemasque (Author of The Truth)
Duh, indeed!~Lotmstaunch supporter of the good 'ship SS-HG *waves patriotic, or rather, smutriotic, flag...*
Response from Shishkeberry (Reviewer)
I need one of those smutriotic flags 