A Right Pest

Disclaimer: I do not profit fiscally from this work... unfortunately.

This chapter is titled in honor of Southern_Witch_69, who hit the nail right on the head while beta reading like the pro she is. Thanks, SW!

"Classes are out tomorrow," said Hermione casually over dinner that evening.

"A fact I am blissfully aware of, Miss Granger."

"I think it's a bit pointless to let out school on a Wednesday. Not enough time to follow a lesson for the week, but too much to simply let the students do nothing for three days. Wouldn't you say? But then, I suppose one can't control how the days fall each year..."

"A task I've no doubt you'd take on if you thought you had a chance of succeeding." Severus' grumble was on the ill-tempered side, but not outright malicious, so Hermione ignored it, opting to make conversation...no matter how difficult it proved to be.

The only way to get comfortable with one another was to break the ice, she figured. Granted, the ice with Snape was thick and would probably need broken more than once, but she was up to the challenge. They were already through the thickest of it, she hoped...

"So," she said, mentally casting about for something to say.

"Miss Granger," he interrupted, "must you continue your prattling? If I was interested in having a conversation with you, I would start one." His tone wasn't as vicious as it could have been, but it gave Hermione pause.

"Well, pardon me," she said, trying not to be offended. "I was trying to talk to you because I believe it would help us to be more comfortable with one another. That's what people do, you know. They talk."

"I am aware that people talk. I am also aware that for most people, talking is a way to gain familiarity. I, however, am not a person who enjoys mindless chatter while I'm eating."

She couldn't resist. "So you're saying you enjoy mindless chatter while you're not eating? Goodness, Professor, I must say you are full of surprises."

He put down his fork to glare at her, and she smirked.

"You are not amusing, Miss Granger." His tone could have been very dry or very irritated; it was probably both.

Hermione endeavored to look surprised. "Are you sure?" she said as she tilted her head. "I could have sworn that I am. A number of people have told me so. Are you saying that my friends have been lying to me all these years, Professor?" She was trying to get him to relax, but it didn't appear to be working.

"I do not appreciate being teased," he said, glaring at her for another moment...until he was sure she felt properly censured, no doubt...then went back to his food, ignoring her.

She sighed. "I wasn't teasing you," she said. "I was teasing myself; I'm new at it, so I must not be very good yet."

He gave her a brief look that she couldn't read and went on with his dinner.

She was beginning to be frustrated. She was putting in all the effort here and getting nothing in return. "Look, I don't know how we are going to have any sort of friendship if we can't even have a conversation. I'm trying here, but I need you to meet me half way. I can't do all the work for both of us."

"I wasn't aware that you considered this to be work." He kept his gaze focused ahead, and Hermione stared at him incredulously for a moment, wondering if he was serious. He had to know that his simple unwillingness to give anything was making this hard for her. Was he really unaware of it...was he really that emotionally oblivious...or was he messing with her... again? Anything was possible with him, but at the moment, she preferred to think that maybe he really didn't understand.

She paused again before she spoke, and when she did, her words were measured, drawn out, as if to make sure she said exactly what she meant. "Relationships take work. Being a friend to someone and letting a person be a friend to you isn't easy...at least it never has been for me.

"I don't know what to tell you, Professor...other than that I can't do this by myself, and you are making it even more difficult for both of us by refusing to communicate with me."

He finally looked at her, taking a moment to measure her before he spoke. "I told you before that I have little experience with... this. You are asking me to, in one meal, change the way I relate to others. That is not something I'm prepared or even able to do."

"No, I'm not asking that you change the way you relate to others; I'm asking that you change the way you relate to me. And I'm not asking that you do it in one meal. I'm simply asking you to take a step towards it...by talking to me. I realize that it is outside of your comfort zone, but I thought that we had reached some sort of understanding, that we were going to at least try to get along, to be friends. I know that isn't something you are naturally comfortable with, so I'm trying to... I don't know... lead you into it."

His gaze pierced hers as though he was trying to turn her mind inside out, and she didn't look away. She began to feel a bit uncomfortable as he looked at her, and she wondered what he was thinking, what he was looking for in her eyes. She looked back at him with as much sincerity as she could find...if it was possible to show sincerity in one's eyes. She wondered how it was possible for any one man to have so much command in his glare, in his whole persona.

His eyes finally narrowed in suspicion, and he broke the silence with one word.

"Why?"

Hermione stared back at him, not understanding. She shook her head in confusion and sent him a perplexed look.

"Why are you doing this?" he asked, and his voice gave nothing of what he was feeling away.

"I don't understand, Professor." And she didn't.

"I told you I would be willing to treat you civilly, cease the outright malice, at least ignore you, but you insisted that we try to be friends. You offered to help me; you said you wanted me to be happy. Why?"

There was another long pause in which Hermione searched for something to say and found nothing.

"What do you want from me?" he asked quietly.

He waited for her answer, and Hermione thought good and hard about it. What did she want from him? The answer came to her, and it was so very obvious. She spoke honestly and earnestly, making sure to look him in the eye. "I want to know you.

"I just want to know you."

The shock in his eyes was brief, but powerful. It was gone before Hermione could understand it truly, but she was sure it had been there. It made her sad that he could be rendered speechless just by being told that someone wanted to know him. She wondered again what kind of life this man must have lived, but she knew the answer. She knew very well the kind of life he'd lived. She didn't know the details, but she knew enough to understand that it made sense for him to be caught off guard by her answer.

She offered him a rueful sort of smile at that thought and watched as he gave her yet another inscrutable look.

After a long, heavy silence, he finally spoke, using the same measured tone Hermione had used minutes before.

"I think, Miss Granger, that it might be possible to arrange that."

"What...me knowing you?"

He gave a short nod, and she smiled a bit. She waited for him to expound further, but he seemed at a loss at where to go, so Hermione took the lead.

"Well, then. I suppose there's only one thing for it," she said, smirking.

He arched a brow in response.

Hermione took a breath and went for it. "Hello, I'm Hermione Granger."

She offered her hand and waited for him to react. She was certain he was thinking her very silly, but she was doing the only thing she could think of to bridge the gap between them: offering to start over...completely.

The seconds ticked by as he stared at first her hand, then her eyes, then her hand again, and finally reached forward tentatively to grasp it.

"Severus Snape," he said softly, and she let out a sigh of relief, feeling herself relax and giving him a genuine smile.

"Well, Severus Snape, it's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. May I ask what has you in Scotland as this time of year?"

That earned her an amused snort and a roll of the eyes. She wondered if he'd continue to play along; he did. He released her hand and picked up his fork again, taking another bite and quickly swallowing.

"I'm a professor at this school, Miss Granger." The 'as you are quite aware, and I find you rather ridiculous' went unspoken.

Hermione grinned, pleased that he was going along with her game. "What a coincidence!" she said. "I also happen to be a professor at this school."

He rolled his eyes again, and she chuckled. "All right, I'm being silly."

"Quite."

"But you get the idea, and you were doing very well. See? Having a conversation isn't so hard. When you relax, you're quite good at it."

She elbowed him good-naturedly and felt him tense for a moment. She wondered if she'd gone too far, but after a moment, he slowly relaxed, as though making a conscious decision to do so.

They ate in silence for a few moments, easing into one another's presence with a sort of companionable silence. Hermione wondered how far his physical tolerance of her went, and she decided to risk testing it a bit. She scooted her chair a bit closer to him so that her right arm was touching his left. He gave her an odd look, but when he didn't tense or push her away, she settled again and went back to her food. She wondered if simple contact like this was foreign to him, and though he didn't appear to be uncomfortable, she thought it probably was. She hoped it was good for him to be touched.

After a few minutes, it became a bit inconvenient to try to eat her dessert that way...considering she was right-handed...so she moved away again. He glanced at her once more, but said nothing.

When dessert was finished, she knew that neither of them had any excuse to continue sitting there, but a part of her was afraid that if she got up and left or if he did, everything they'd accomplished tonight would be for naught. She searched for something to say that would be meaningful, but nothing came.

Severus wiped his mouth a final time and stood abruptly, and her chance was gone. She only hoped nothing would change overnight. Looking up at him, she offered him one last smile and was reassured a bit when he nodded back before sweeping out of the room.

She finished her glass of wine leisurely, deep in thought, and retired to her rooms with a full stomach and an even fuller mind.

~*~*~*~

It wasn't until she was halfway through her breakfast the next morning that Hermione remembered again that today was the last day of classes before the break. She stuffed a spoonful of oatmeal into her mouth and thought about her plans for the coming two weeks...and realized she really didn't have any. Mitch had said he'd be free, and she did want to spend some time with him, but no more than an evening or two...certainly not the whole break.

She didn't really want to stay at the school, but she'd moved out of her flat months ago, and she didn't much fancy staying with her parents for two weeks. Like Mitch, an evening or an afternoon with them would be enjoyable, but much longer than that and she would begin to feel suffocated.

It was as she was contemplated her lack of plans that Severus sat down next to her. Her head snapped up, startled. She hadn't even heard him approaching. She wondered for the briefest of moments whether he would revert back to... himself, but before she could give it much thought, he glanced at her and said, "Good day, Miss Granger. I hope this morning finds you well."

She stared at him blankly, and then she cracked up. She tried to stifle her amusement, but failed dismally, earning her a frown.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I'm not laughing at you. It's just... that was rather formal, don't you think?"

She saw his face go hard.

"Don't!" she said. "Don't close up. I didn't mean to insult you. Please. I just... it was just so... you. I do appreciate the effort. I was honestly afraid that you would go back to snarling at me. I'm glad you haven't. I'm sorry, really."

He nodded stiffly, but didn't say anything else. She bit her lip and tried to think of something to say to put him at ease again. Before she could really consider the thought that came to her mind, she blurted it out.

"What are you doing for the holidays?"

"Doing?"

"Er, yes. You know, doing. To celebrate... or, yes."

She saw his lower lip twitch up before he answered.

"Catching up on my reading."

"That's it?" she blurted again.

He frowned at her, his expression somewhere between annoyance and amusement. "Thank you for pointing out my lack of celebratory plans, Miss Granger."

She chuckled a bit uncomfortably, unsure if he was truly offended. "Well, it's not as if I have any room to speak; I don't have plans either."

"You without a plan, Miss Granger?" he asked in mock wonder. "Shall I inform the Prophet?"

"Ha."

He smirked at her. "No, I haven't any plans. I generally use the holidays, Christmas and summer, to catch up on my reading and research. The school schedule rarely affords me time for such things; therefore, I take advantage of any free time available."

She nodded. "That makes sense. I wasn't aware that you were able to do any research now that you don't have a lab."

"What makes you think my research is in Potions?"

"Oh. Oh, well, isn't it?"

He snorted again. "Yes, it is. I do have a lab. It's smaller than my old one...yours...but it is sufficient for my needs."

"Oh. Right." Hermione went back to her oatmeal, pondering in turns what kind of research he did and the coming break...what she would do with her own free time.

An idea was pestering her, and she couldn't get away from it, so she finally gave in.

"Professor?"

"Mmm."

"So you're... So you're not doing anything...with... anybody?"

He pursed his lips and glared at her. "I believe we already covered that, Miss Granger."

"Yes, well, I was thinking, that is, wondering, erm... if you would maybe like to, er, do... something... with me?"

He stared blankly at her. "Something."

"Yes, something. Dinner, maybe?"

"We sit next to one another every for dinner every night of the week...every meal in fact."

"... Well, I know. I just mean, together, you know. I mean, in celebration for the holidays. If not dinner, there's this party at..."

"Are you asking me on a date, Miss Granger?"

"No! What? No. Well, no. I just thought maybe you'd like to come we me on Christmas Eve. See, there's this... get together. It could be, would be, fun."

"Fun?"

"Yes. I, well..."

"Miss Granger, are you aware that you are stuttering? It makes it quite difficult to carry on a conversation when I can't understand half of what you're saying."

She glared at him. "I'm not stuttering," she snapped. "I was simply offering my company."

She turned her glare to her bowl and barely restrained herself from muttering petulantly. That insufferable man... she thought. She couldn't believe he would just...

"Fine."

Her head snapped up, and she arched both brows at him. "Fine?"

"Yes."

"... Fine as in you're admitting I wasn't stuttering, or fine as in you'll go with me?"

"The latter."

"Oh. All right. Erm, well, good. Then, it's on Monday at six o'clock, which is... Right, well, of course I'm sure I'll just remind you before then, but just so you kn..."

"You're stuttering again."

She pursed her lips, irritated with being interrupted, before speaking again in a clipped tone. "Fine. I've got a class in ten minutes, Professor. I shall see you at lunch."

"Inevitably."

She shook her head and huffed on the way out, but couldn't help smiling a bit once her back was to him.

Christmas Eve at the Weasleys' would prove interesting this year; she was sure of it.

~*~*~*~

Lunch and dinner that day were much the same as the morning had been, and by breakfast on Thursday, the first day of the break, Hermione found herself looking forward to the company of her new...well, not yet friend, but more than acquaintance...and the jibes, the sarcasm and wit that came with him. The little games they played together kept her on her toes, and she thought it was good that both of them were learning how to take the other with a grain of salt.

She'd left each meal feeling like she'd just fought some sort of battle, but she was never sure if she had won.

He was already sitting when she arrived, and she decided to test how far she could push him; she thought he was getting better at being teased, just as she was getting better at teasing herself.

"Good day, Professor Snape. I hope this morning finds you well," she said as she sat down...with as straight a face as she could manage.

He didn't let her down. "So formal, Miss Granger? Surely you can loosen up in the presence of your old professor. One might think you were uncomfortable with normal human interaction."

Hermione smiled. Maybe he could tease himself after all. "Normal, Professor? I wasn't aware than 'normal' was definable."

"Mmm, perhaps not."

"Then again," she said, "perhaps it is. Would you say it would be 'normal' of me to ask you to get your elbow off the table so that I might reach my spoon? One might say that 'normal' people remember their manners in polite company, even this early in the morning."

"When you point out polite company to me, I shall remember my manners," he said, but he moved his elbow.

She laughed and gave him a friendly nudge. "In that case, I'll keep an eye out. Say, you don't own any red clothing, do you?"

He gave her a look that plainly said, 'You must be joking.'

"I didn't think so."

"Then why did you ask?"

"Well, the party at the Burrow on Christmas Eve...everyone tends to dress festively in either red or green. I'm sure you own enough green clothing to pass by. I was just checking."

He just stared at her. "The Burrow."

"Yes, you know. That's where the Weas..."

"Yes, I am quite aware of what the Weasleys have named their home. I was referring to the part about a party there on Christmas Eve. That wouldn't happen to be the party you insisted I accompany you to, would it?"

"I didn't insist, and yes, of course it is. I thought I'd told you that."

His mouth was set in hard lines. "No, Miss Granger, you most certainly did not tell me that, and you can be assured I have no interest in attending any..."

"What? Why not? Maybe I didn't tell you where it was, but why does it matter? A party is just a party."

"No, Miss Granger," he snapped. "It's not. A party is not just a party. Not when half of the Order of the Phoenix, most of whom abhor my existence, I might add, are in attendance."

"Oh, come now. They do not abhor your existence. No one has even seen you since your trial, and that was years ago. How could anyone hate you after all that, after everything you did?"

"They hate me because of everything I did, and they hate me on principle. I'm the Greasy Git, the loathsome Bat of the Dungeons, remember? It doesn't matter anyway. They're right to hate me, but I'm not going to subject myself to their scorn when I can easily avoid it."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Professor, self-loathing doesn't become you."

He glared at her, his lip curling.

"Besides, I happen to know that none of the Weasleys or Order have anything against you. No one does, at least not anyone who matters. Well," she conceded, "no one except for..."

"Potter."

She bit her lip. "Well, Harry's always reserved a... special place in his heart for you. He does loathe you on principle, but you can't take that personally...it wouldn't matter what you did, good or bad; Harry will always love to hate you. It's his favorite pastime." Her lips quirked up even as she tried not to smile.

"Your casual treatment of this does not amuse me, Miss Granger."

His tone was icy, and Hermione sighed.

"You wanted to know why I wouldn't attend? There's your answer: Potter. I need no other reason."

"Now you're just grasping for excuses. Look, I'm not even sure Harry will be there; he wasn't last year. And even if he is, it is always quite a large gathering. There wouldn't be any reason you would even have to see him. There will be plenty of other people you can talk to, or you can talk to no one. My point is if you want to avoid him, it wouldn't be hard."

"And Potter?" he said. "Something tells me he wouldn't be happy to simply ignore me if I showed up in his sanctuary."

"It's not his sanctuary, and you belong there just as much as anyone else. Listen, I know we've never really talked about your contribution to the war..."

"Then let's not start now," he said, cutting her off with another glare...not that he'd stopped glaring before then.

Hermione sighed again. "I wasn't going to bring up details, I was just going to say that you deserve to have a nice dinner with nice people as much as anyone else, and anyone who has held onto a grudge against you is the one with the problem. You can't let the opinions of others dictate how you are going to live your life, Professor. After all this time and all you've done for everyone, you've earned the right to live your life the way you deserve."

He stared at her for a long time in that piercing way of his that always made Hermione feel like she was being stripped from the inside out. A lesser person might have shrunken away, but Hermione held her ground...as best she could, at least.

He finally relented, and she breathed. "You aren't even sure he'll be there?"

He'd already given in, and they both knew it. His question was just his way of easing his own discomfort.

Hermione decided to let him. She could have rejoiced at her triumph...inside, she did...but she knew he wouldn't appreciate having attention drawn to his concession, so she kept her face straight and answered him honestly. "He might be. I don't really know. If he is, just go about your business as if he wasn't."

"Why are you insisting upon this, Miss Granger? I don't understand why it should be any concern of yours how I spend my holiday or why you've asked me to attend this at all. You surely can't tell me it's just for the pleasure of my company."

She smiled at that. "When you aren't snarling at me, I enjoy your company. I honestly do. And I already answered your question. I think you deserve to be able to live your life." Her smile turned wry. "Blame it on my 'Gryffindor sense of fairness.'"

He snorted. "Gryffindor, indeed."

"So you'll come?"

He nodded. "However," he said, "after Potter has picked a fight and I've had to hex him to defend myself, I reserve the right to say 'I told you so.'"

She chuckled, and aloud she said, "Fair enough," but inside she couldn't help but cross her fingers that it wouldn't come to hexing.

She just might have to have a talk with Harry between now and Monday evening....