Lifting the Blindness
Chapter 18 of 18
Fawkes_07Things begin to look a little brighter.
ReviewedIt was one of those rare, pleasant days when events and circumstances flowed smoothly. Minerva was not only willing to give Snape an advance on his salary, she even happened to have some Muggle money on hand. When he Flooed to the Atrium of the Ministry of Magic, it was as empty as a tomb. That by itself was hardly unexpected, it being a Saturday, but even the security desk was unmanned, the guard apparently fetching a cup of coffee. The sky was clear and the air brisk for his short walk through Muggle London; rain had been pouring at Hogwarts.
The blind woman in the music shop flipped the "Closed" placard to "Open" just as Snape approached, and she smiled warmly at him, recognizing his voice. "I just knew you'd be back," she confided as she led him to the counter. She patted the shelves behind it for mere seconds before bringing up a manila folder stuffed with sheet music. "My clerk pulled all the scores I have for the left hand and put them in here. They were filed under their composer and that's rather silly; they belong in their own category." Her cluck of disapproval amused Snape; here was a kindred spirit in compulsive organization. He bought the sheets she recommended, then asked to be let out the back door. She led him to a windowless alley perfect for Apparating. The entire outing took less than an hour--quite a difference from the day trips for Potions ingredients. Snape would never have guessed that shopping could actually be enjoyable.
Upon reaching the landing outside Pendragon's chambers, his good mood immediately evaporated. It took a moment to gather up the resolution to knock.
She answered the door herself, another first. "Snape," she said, neither a welcome nor a reproach. She spun on her heel and stomped over to an armchair, holding her hand out expectantly after she sat. It took him a moment to realize she was waiting for her potion.
This is quite a change! He diligently concealed his surprise until the tumbler was empty. "It appears I need no longer hold you down to make you take your medicine," he drawled as the sharpness returned to her expression.
She held up her hand and closed her eyes a moment, collecting herself, then grinned impishly. "Then perhaps I'll keep putting up a fight." Her eyes sparkled. "Come here, Severus."
"No."
Snape had no idea how she would react, and he braced for the worst. Were he superstitious, he might have crossed his fingers at that moment, but Snape believed only in magic, not luck.
Pendragon blinked, then squeezed her eyes shut tight. Snape began counting silently, as he had done since he was a very small boy, during times when calm and patience were the only way to evade grim punishment.
When her eyes finally opened, they were still focused. She cocked her head. "Excuse me? Problem?"
For a few seconds, Snape let himself smile, let the tension run off like molten stone from his shoulders. She was indignant, not hysterical. The potion was not just working, it was working well.
"No problem, Pendragon. I've brought you a gift." He handed her the small sheaf of music. She shook her head, puzzled, but accepted it and studied the first page.
"What is this?" she mumbled. "Some sort of error in the printing? There's no treble, just the..." She frowned, peering at the document more closely, then raised her eyes in a suspicious glare. "What do you want me to do with this?"
"It's just what it looks like. I want you to play it."
Her expression could have turned the sun into a black hole. "You're joking."
"Do I appear amused?" It was actually a trick question; he found her chilly reaction rather droll, but he knew not a mote of it showed on his face.
She folded her arms, crimping the sheet music in the process. "Forget it. If I'm going to play, it'll be real music, not this--"
"This what, Pen?" Snape barked sharply. "I'm told this is fine stuff, technical and elegant. It also happens to accomodate your physical limitations."
For a moment, he thought he'd gone a little too far. Every muscle in her face and neck tightened into cords and he was not close enough to envelop her in a suffocating hug. Snape instinctively glanced around the woman for any heavy or sharp items within her reach. To his amazement, however, she stayed rooted to the spot, lashing out only with words.
"It's for freaks! Not music! No! I won't--" She gasped for air, stamping her feet and crushing the paper in one hand. It was all right, though; the outburst gave him time to get around the armchair and yank her to his chest. Although she shook with anger, she made no attempt to withdraw from him, even mashing her face into his robes. She was trying to calm down, trying to let him help her. He found it quite touching, and had to remind himself not to speak or stroke her hair.
"You enraged me on purpose, didn't you?" she finally said, in a wry, muffled voice.
He scoffed, cautiously loosening his grip and resting his chin against her head. "Because I so love being assaulted with the nearest blunt instrument." He moved his hands to a more comfortable position. "Pendragon, try very hard to think once more about the sheet music. I'll hold you this time. Stay calm and speak to me when you can. Why do you resist playing it?"
Her body tensed anew and the loose pages clattered to the floor. When that wave of hysteria passed, she spoke without looking up, making him feel the words vibrating in his lungs. "Those pieces... They're an insult. Mockery." She quieted again for a few moments, then picked up again as though only a breath had elapsed. "My music is the only whole thing I have left. Don't you get it? If I give up the treble, that's it. It's over. The curse wins. I lose. I'm broken everywhere."
Had Pen been free to look him in the face, she would have seen a scowl that had historically been reserved for her Uncle Harry. "What a pile of centaur shite," he finally said aloud, noting rather proudly that she merely stiffened with everyday affront. "That may have seemed true in the past, young lady," he went on, "but I won't hear any of it now. Look at yourself, Pen! Look how far you've come these past weeks. You can't tell me you're irreparably broken."
She remained quiet for so long that Snape began to wonder offhandedly if she'd fallen asleep, but he didn't mind. Holding her was a chore he quite enjoyed, but for the fact that he couldn't let his hands roam. At last she raised her head, sliding her arms around him. "Severus."
That brought a warm smile to his face. "I'm here, Pen. Play the music for me now."
The recital had to be postponed, however, until she could clear the tears from her eyes and read the music.
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Latest 25 Reviews for Private Lessons
93 Reviews | 7.99/10 Average
I love this fic! I hope it's not abandoned.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
No, it's just on the back burner with many other things.
Response from darkavatar (Reviewer)
yay! good to hear it's still on a burner somewhere. 
Here I sit on my toadstool waiting and waiting to be fed just a few bites of this story.
(let's pretend this is a toadstool,shall we?)
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
awww... I will get to it eventually, I promise.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
awww... I will get to it eventually, I promise.
More please.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
I think I know how this one will end, at last--so this'll probably be my next endeavor once I wrap up Heirs.
ahh, a lovely Harry-free chapter!! (sits back to listen to music) my cousin was a piano teacher for years, and then had a stroke and could only use one hand. but she plays beautifully - music for one-hand, of course. I'm hoping Pen realizes the beauty of the music, especially if/when she discovers that Severus is paying for it himself on his teensy salary, making this a very valuable gift. thanks for updating! (more, please?)
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
I have a few chapters left which I hope to write and post as soon as I can...sadly, I am She Of Too Many Unfinished Fics.
excellent to find an update of this great story.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Thanks! It only has a couple more chapters to go, but I don't know when I can get to it again. But I will, promise.
Response from Bettina (Reviewer)
Hi, please rememer us poor sods who're waiting for an update of this great story!
I am so glad you updated. Just in time for my birthday again. But please don't feel you need to wait a year again. Seriously, I am really glad this has not been abandoned. This is one of my favorite stories. I love the way you have created both characters and the situation you have created. It feels so real and plausible. I look forward to reading the rest.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Thanks! Happy B-day! I know, I'm behind on all my updates--RL has a way of interfering with my fanfics.
Glad to see an update! Hope we don't have to wait so long for the next! Greedy bunch of readers, aren't we? Thanks for your work!
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
LOL, well, it's nice to be wanted.
Oh, I'm so glad you updated, I have been waiting for this one!
I'm glad he managed to calm her about the music, it will be wonderful for her to get back into doing it properly.
Thank you for updating, and please don't leave it so long next time!
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Thanks--trying. Lots of stuff to write.
FINALLY!!!!!!! I had almost given up hope...
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
I always finish things. Eventually...
I've thoroughly enjoyed reading all 18 chapters. I can understand the medthod he uses to calm her, My god son's middle child, a boy, has the Asperger's Syndrome form of autism and his parents use the same methods with him. He couldn't stand to have people around or the sound of their voices and and got very upset if anyone tried to touch him. When anyone came to see the family he went into a shell and totally ignored everything.
He has shown quite a bit of improvement in the last few years. His great grandmother told me that last year he actually kissed her when she came to visit and kissed her goodbye when she left. When I saw her during the holidays she told me that it's become routine now for him to do that when she visits.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
good for him! They do grow out of it to some extent, but it can take a very long time. Have to believe in a little dragon magic, I guess.
I should have reviewed when i started reading this about 11 PM, but I got so enthralled I couldn't stop until now. It's just about 4 AM and i should go to bed, but I will have to finish all the chapters you have posted first.
Leon Fleisher must have been your inspiration for this story, or at least this chapter. When he lost the use of his right hand at the peak of his career it was thought to be a tragedy, but he had the fortitude to forge on ahead and have a great career performing music written for the left handed repertoire. The miracle that resrored his right hand had to be some kind of Muggle magic. I live in Maryland and studied voice at Peabody Prep many years ago, so i am familiar with Fleisher and very pleased that he can once again play with both hands.
I am, or more accurately, was, a dramatic soprano and I used to sing the Bach Ave Maria until I lost my control of the top notes as i grew older. It's been nearly 10 years since I done any singing. I could probably sing the mezzo repertoire with no problem if i got back with my voice teacher, but she was 15 years older than me and no longer teaching. I don't want to have to start with someone new and have to learn new methods and techniques as they familiarize themselves with my voice. That would take too long and now that I'm older there are too many other things I put aside when i was younger that I want to see and do now before it's too late.
I'm still listening to the recording of the Third Movement of the Moonlight Sonata. I'm going back to the story now with that as accompanment to my reading. Thanks for the links to the recordings, it add so much to the story.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Wow! What a wonderful review! Thanks! My gosh, I don't know whether to natter a bit about not giving up on your voice, or to congratulate you on doing new things! I'm a bit of a "move on to the new" sort myself, so I guess have to stick with the latter.
Find the Glenn Gould version of Moonlight if you can. That's what I really had in mind for Pen to be playing. I don't think I found a link for that (or did I?).
Hey, thanks for updating. I was worried it was abandoned, but so happy it's not. I like the story very much.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Nope, just busy with other stuff.
That was really touching. Excellent chapter, but I can't help noticing that it isn't Heirs. I thought you were leaving your other WIPs until Heirs was finsihed. Not that I mind, I was just wondering if Fair Exchanges was getting an update soo too, cause that would just be fabulous!
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
I needed a break from Heirs today. 43 is a tough chapter. I might try to update Fair ex too, although that is a very research-oriented fic for me, trying to keep it in Canon. We'll see.
Response from helshez (Reviewer)
Well, whatever you can give us, I'm grateful for. It's always a pleasure to read one of your fics, whichever one it is.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
awwwwwww... *blush*
Seriously, though--one of my RL acquaintances just told me to go back to my hobbit hole and get a life, so it's really nice to hear that this silly stuff I do is appreciated.
Response from helshez (Reviewer)
For what it's worth, your talent is definately appreciated by me (and probably by others, but I can't speak for them) and I think it would be a damn shame if you packed it in. <3
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
I needed a break from Heirs today. 43 is a tough chapter. I might try to update Fair ex too, although that is a very research-oriented fic for me, trying to keep it in Canon. We'll see.
Response from helshez (Reviewer)
Well, whatever you can give us, I'm grateful for. It's always a pleasure to read one of your fics, whichever one it is.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
awwwwwww... *blush*
Seriously, though--one of my RL acquaintances just told me to go back to my hobbit hole and get a life, so it's really nice to hear that this silly stuff I do is appreciated.
Response from helshez (Reviewer)
For what it's worth, your talent is definately appreciated by me (and probably by others, but I can't speak for them) and I think it would be a damn shame if you packed it in. <3
It's been so long I was afraid you've dropped this fic. I'm glad you haven't cause I really love it. Can I hope for more in a close future?
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Thanks! Probably not soon, but it's only a few chapters away from being finished.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Thanks! Probably not soon, but it's only a few chapters away from being finished.
Get on with it...PLEASE!!
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Argh, I know... just a little more patience. I've got the next chapter going in my head, just need to flesh it out and write it down...
Response from Bindi (Reviewer)
There had better be pletty of lemons ahead to make up for this.
Response from Bindi (Reviewer)
Put me out of my misery...please.Pretty,pretty please.
WHAT... it isn't going further than that?
A great story, splendidly written.
Snape can indeed develop that way in 50 years Azkaban. Nice ideas of all and sundry books appearing and he actually using them to enormous benefit. So like him. To send prisoners off with nothing at all fits to the medieval style of JKR's wizarding world in general.
Those lightnings are a unique thing, and even if you need to describe a terrible outcome, you do it very well and without voyeurism at all. Do you have personal knowledge on (Muggle)autism?
The idea that Snape was to die but did not, might be a little far from HBP, and I admit that I didn't try hard to understand all. It is not too far fetched to let it pass--and it is certainly your unique approach.
Will we see some pupils eventually? We're at a school after all.
Besides my curiosity over Harry's and old-Snape's style, it might be good to see Pendragon teach.
Please go on writing, and let Harry develop a little more. He still needs it--which is also no surprise.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Thanks! What a nice review! I hope to work some more on this story when I finish Heirs of Slytherin--it'll be good to get back to it.
Please hurry with the rest, I love this story!
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Gotta finish some other stuff first...
ahem... any chance of an update soon? 
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Siiiiiigh...I have all the ideas worked out, I just have been so busy on Fair Ex and Heirs! It WILL end, and I think the ending will be worth it, but I have to run with whatever muse is working best at the moment!
Get busy! 
I'm starving to death here.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Sorry! My muse has been feeding me Heirs of Slytherin lately--you can go read that, it'll tide you over a while...!
More please. I'm in withdrawal. I really want to read what happens next.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Argh, I know. I want to finish it--there's just so much to write!
Ah! Well done, again. I'm glad Snape is finally warm at least. (I need music for fat people - I'm serious - the fat seems to impair my dexterity - I've heard that PDQ Bach wrote some, hahaha)
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Hmmm...vigorous piano playing as a form of aerobic exercise? Now there's an idea that needs marketing! Any kind of exercise I can do sitting down at a keyboard would make me happy... ;)
It's interesting having a hungry, freezing, poverty-stricken Snape - and good job showing the story, not just telling it.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Thanks! That's certainly something I strive for, never quite sure how well it's working.
Oh Dear...I don't think anyone was expecting that! What a fasinating story line this is...thank you
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
*snerk* A few people had asked about romance, but it was generally between Harry and Pen (or Harry and Snape 
). There's still a twist or two left in the story, though...
Hmmm .... interesting development. Although, it isn't un-anticipated, but it still suprising when you really write it down. So, I will wait again, just like last week, with a more and more curiosity what our beloved Harry reaction to this and to what path you drive this story ends (darn you Fawkes, you really know how to make your reader feels edgy). While the nice compliment of "where .... leads, million readers will follow" is written to address another particular legal thriller novel writer by a certain reviewer, I certainly do not have any objection if you fill the blank with the title of this fanfic or your name and replace the word "million readers" with my name.Keep the good work, Mate.
Response from Fawkes_07 (Author of Private Lessons)
Awwwwwwwwwww...*blush* What a sweet compliment! Thanks!