Chapter 18

Disclaimer: Still having fun with JKR's characters (and still not making any Galleons!).

Thanks go to Charmed_Nay, who has been working way too many hours each week, for the beta job!

Ron Apparated near the Burrow and made his way through the wards undetected. He quickly slipped inside the old shed to get his broom and the old one he used to ride before his parents gifted him with the new one after he'd made Prefect. After mounting his and placing the other beneath his arm, he craftily made his way up to a window where the Malfoys were staying, the night helping to hide him from anyone that might be looking out.

As luck would have it, only Draco was in the room, his parents obviously below still, talking with the others. He flew over and tapped on the glass, smirking as the boy inside looked over to the window in terror at first before relaxing.

"Weasley, what are you doing out here?" he asked when he opened the window. "Potter was just here looking for you."

"I don't want to talk about him right now."

"Lovers quarrel then?" Draco asked with a snicker.

Ron drew his wand out quickly. "I've a question for you."

Looking at his wand with wide eyes, Draco asked, "What's that?"

"Were you serious earlier when you said that you wished you could help out?"

Draco nodded. "I'm sick of being stuck here. I want to do something to...hang on! Are you asking for my help?" There was suspicion in his voice. "You said you didn't trust me."

"I don't, not really, but you can prove yourself." He put away his wand and extended the spare broom towards Malfoy. "Come with me and help me find where they are keeping Hermione."

"Are you mad? I'm not going there!"

"Look, you just need to show me where it is. I know you're a coward. You don't have to get too close." He shrugged. "You can fly back here after with your tail between your legs for all I care. Leave the rest to me. I just need your help in finding it. I've got a map and have an idea about where it is, but you'll know the area when you see it."

The blond mulled this over. "This would prove that my family truly is trying to be helpful," he said finally. "But my father and mother have already told the Order all we know about where it is. Shouldn't you get them to help you?"

"They're sitting on their arses, and meanwhile, Snape's using Hermione more and more, fucking with her mind and body! I have to save her. Now! I can't wait on Harry and the others. It's obvious she's not on the top of their priority list."

And that was the truth. Harry knew what was happening, and yet, he'd not said or done anything about it. The git! Ron blamed him nearly as much as anyone else. Like Draco said, with what the Malfoys had told them, they could have found the place by now and taken on the lot!

Nervously, Draco said, "All right. Just let me leave a note for my mum."

"No. I don't want them coming to mess this up. Get on the broom and come on."

"You call this a broom?" he said with a sneer.

"Don't even go there," Ron warned, gazing at him fiercely.

"Fine. You lead to this place your map says, and once we're there, I'll see what looks familiar. After that, I'm coming here, Weasley. I can't go back inside there."

"Thought as much, you git. Come on."

The first thing he'd do is hex Snape...make him pay for what he'd been doing...and then he'd deal with Hermione. Hopefully, there wouldn't be too many others there. He'd stalk the place first and see what he could before moving in. Hermione was obviously under some sort of spell or potion. He'd take her off where they could be alone and try to sort her out before returning to the Burrow with her.

He thought of Lavender and how she'd said she would always do anything for him and how she loved him...and only him...and would be waiting for him to come to his senses where Hermione was concerned. If he could force himself to love Lavender the way he loved Hermione, things would be so much simpler, wouldn't they? Why couldn't he? It wasn't as though she couldn't please him... though she was quite annoying. Was he a fool for caring so much about Hermione? How could she not fight Snape's spell? Shouldn't she know deep down that it was wrong? She'd seemed too at ease and not like anyone under a bloody spell.

Ah, I suppose she wouldn't know though. The git's probably using dark magic, and she did have trouble lifting that Imperius when the fake Moody taught us. She'll be so upset once she realizes what she's been doing, been letting him do. I'll be there to help her through it though.

However, another thought came to him. Could he handle touching her and having her after Snape had been all over her? Would he see Snape's greasy hands touching her each time he'd kiss her or hold her? Ron shuddered and pushed those thoughts away. He'd find a way to get over it eventually. Right now, Hermione needed him, and if he had to trade Draco Malfoy for her safety, he would, and he wouldn't feel the least bit guilty about it either. The prat was a coward and wasn't doing this to help her; he was doing it for his family's fate...nothing more.

This was war. So be it if there were a few casualties. Ron simply wanted to make certain that his Hermione wasn't one of them. Once she was sorted out, he'd confront Harry and the others. He wondered exactly how many people had known about what was going on? Who'd been keeping this from him?

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Harry crossed his arms and watched as Lupin made himself comfortable. There were so many things he wanted to ask the man...so many things he wanted to be angry about. He knew that now wasn't the time, though, and he tried to calm himself.

"What's the emergency, Harry?" Lupin asked.

"There are some things we need to talk about, but we'll have to do that later. For now, I'm going to let you in on some things that you haven't been aware of."

"Sounds serious."

"It is. Voldemort has been sending me memories to view in a Pensieve. Professor McGonagall and I have been dealing with them."

"That was very foolish. You should have told us!" Lupin said incredulously.

"We didn't see the point, and trust me, we analyzed each of the memories for clues."

"What are they about?"

"Voldemort is trying to make me think that Hermione's turned against me and is having an affair with Snape. He's sending memories that Snape's giving him to show me...all of them where she and Snape are... quite close."

"Good God."

Harry nodded. "Yeah, so you see why I couldn't show Ron."

"Of course. But that doesn't mean you couldn't have told me!"

"We've figured out that Snape and Hermione are faking it. Making Voldemort think they are doing his bidding. If you look closely, you can tell that it's all an act. So, it wasn't reason enough for us to tell everyone. Not when it would only end up hurting Hermione in the long run." He frowned. "McGonagall has also been showing me memories of Snape when he was younger...Snape and Mum."

Lupin let out a sharp breath. "Harry..."

"Why did you never tell me?"

"That...that was Severus' business to tell."

"And mine!" he retorted hotly. "She was MY mum!"

"And capable of making her own choices without having to answer to her son."

"I deserved to know! If I'd known that, so many things would have made sense to me!"

Lupin shook his head. "Well, you know now. There's no point in acting like a child about it. We can talk more on that later. What's the emergency? Surely this isn't it!"

"Ron's seen the Pensieve... and some memories. He's gone after her."

"Shite."

"Exactly. What's worse is that he's told Lavender that he's going to trade someone for Hermione. I have no idea what he's up to."

"He's snapped! They'll never let him out of there alive, regardless of his foolish plan."

Harry ran his fingers through his hair and turned away. "I need help...someone I can trust... you."

"Certainly. Where do we start?"

"Do you think we should talk to Mr. Weasley or Bill about this? Maybe ask them along?"

"Harry, I think you'd be a fool not to. There's no telling what Ron's going to get himself into or what's waiting for him. Voldemort himself might be there. I say we get the Order involved, all of them!"

He turned back to face Lupin. "Not everyone. I don't think Mrs. Weasley or..."

"I agree." Lupin thought for a moment. "Bill, Arthur, Alastor, and Kingsley."

"And we will make it clear that Snape's not to be harmed. He's on our side," Harry said confidently.

Lupin nodded. "They know he's been giving us information."

"But they might be a bit wand happy, too." He smiled and extended a hand, which Lupin grasped. "Thank you."

"There's no need to thank me, Harry. I will always be here for you and try to help you as much as I can."

"I know... for my dad."

"No, Harry, for you," Lupin said firmly.

Harry nodded in appreciation of his openness. "You get the Weasleys, and I'll get Moody and Kingsley." He paused. "And Lupin?"

"Yes?"

"Try not to alert Mrs. Weasley that anything is going on. She already knows Ron is missing and wouldn't stay put if she knew we were going after him. I told her I'd be by to let her know something as soon as I could."

"So that's why you're sending me to the Burrow." Lupin grinned. "I'll meet you back here as soon as I can."

"Right then. See you."

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Hermione felt the bed shift as he slipped in beside her. He'd been careful to make no noise as he'd entered and undressed. If she'd been asleep, she'd never have been aware of him. Sleep hadn't come to her, though, as she'd been thinking about him, about Ron, about many things. She kept her eyes shut tightly even as one of his hands softly caressed her hair and retreated.

They both wanted to experience each other, and yet, he wouldn't do it. She knew he wanted to, however, as he'd explained as much to her. She wanted to as well. There was undeniably something between them. The urge to explore that and to know him was quite overwhelming at times. And she wasn't fooling herself into thinking it would be anything lasting. Once she got out of this...if ever...she would continue on with her life and goals as she had before.

Unable to resist, she scooted closer to him to place an arm around his waist and her head on his chest. He must have thought her to do it while she slept, for an arm tightened around her, and he whispered, "What will I do with you, Hermione?" Then she felt his face in her hair, heard him inhale deeply, and felt a small kiss pressed softly against her head.

In all her life, she'd never felt so needed. What sort of man would he be if he'd not led the life he'd chosen? Would he be a tender lover, considerate husband, and loving mate? Would the rude man she'd known to be her professor have never existed? "Oh, Sev..." she said with a sigh, hugging him more tightly. He stiffened beneath her. "Just hold me."

"What did you call me?"

She'd meant to say Severus, but only the first part had come out. However, he shouldn't be so uptight about it. If anything, he should be more annoyed that she was actually awake and had heard what he'd said and felt what he'd done. "Surely someone's called you that before."

"Y-es." His voice cracked.

She tilted her head up to look at him. "Are you all right?"

"Shouldn't you be sleeping?" The steel was back in his voice, and his expression was inscrutable.

But she'd heard the emotion in his voice. Had his first love called him that? "I couldn't sleep," she said softly before pressing a kiss to his bare chest.

"Hermione, don't."

She did it again, this time opening her mouth and moving her tongue over his cool flesh. The shudder she felt go through him was delicious. Emboldened, she did it again, moving over to his flat nipple and taking that into her mouth, laving it and sucking lightly.

His gasp was loud. "What... Stop."

Hermione released him with a small popping noise and a smile. "I just want to feel close to you, to know you."

"When this is over, you will regret much of what we've done already," he said, gently putting her away from him. "I don't want you to look back on this time and loathe me. I..." His voice trailed away.

"I could never loathe you. Not now that I know you."

"But you just said it yourself. You don't know me. You only want to know me, think you know me." When she tried to get closer, he held her off. "I am but a man, Hermione. Would you have me use you and cast you off as soon as I am able? That's all that would come of it, and I've come to respect you too much to take advantage of that."

"You would have made love to me that night if I'd allowed it."

"I'd had too much to drink, and my mind was clouded, which is a mistake I'll not make again."

"Severus, I know you don't love me, and I'm not asking for that. I just... We're here and we're adults. I should have said yes that night, but I was confused and just didn't know what I wanted."

He sighed. "You still don't know what you want."

"I just want to be with you...for now. When the time comes t-to leave you, I'll go on and not look back or blame you for anything."

"Hermione, you've been locked here with me for a long time now. Whatever loyalty and curiosity you might feel..."

She interrupted his words with a brief kiss. "Can you just hold me? Make me feel safe? When I'm close to you, I feel so... so good. Please." Relief washed over her as he pulled her back against him and held her close. She placed a leg between his and cuddled closely. "Thank you."

Even though he didn't reply, she knew that he'd wanted to hold her, too. Things had changed between them. Too many days and nights of pretending had made her comfortable with him, had allowed her to see him as more than just Severus Snape. No matter what she told him or herself, she knew deep down that she'd never forget him and would always hold him dear to her heart.

"Are the others gone still?" she asked after a long moment.

"Yes, though Bella and Rodolphus won't be back. They've been sent on a mission for the Dark Lord," he said.

"What of Rabastan? You seemed worried about him earlier. What were you going to say?"

There was a long pause, and she almost thought he'd not answer her. Then finally, he spoke. "Lately, it seems as if the Dark Lord is displeased with him. I am uncertain why this could be. Perhaps he's sensed something in him that none of us could possibly know. Everything he does, it's not good enough...he gets sent on dangerous missions, is punished excessively... and so on."

"Why wouldn't he just kill him at once?"

"I've been wondering that as well."

"Severus, how is it that you are in such good graces?"

"How do you think?" His voice was suddenly cold, and she felt him try to pull away.

Clinging to him, she said, "I know why he thinks you to be his man. I know that, but what I mean to say is why are you not treated this way? Like Rabastan? In fact, I've seen all the others go through horrible things, and yet, you..." Her voice trailed away. Wouldn't it be horrible if you've been hoodwinked, Hermione? What if he's truly Voldemort's man and has been playing you like a violin since you've been here?

Impossible. She would feel it if something were wrong.

Severus spoke then. "I am not always without my punishments, Hermione, and he doesn't make a habit of harming us. We get rewards often enough. What do you think you're doing here with me?"

She huffed slightly. "I think his methods are horrible."

"He retains the respect of his followers by instilling fear. That doesn't mean that he is always torturing everyone. Quite the opposite. However, he brooks no room for many failures or disappointments."

"If he's such a tyrant, why would people continue to join him?"

"Some are forced, Hermione. What would you do if you were told to do his bidding or watch your entire family be murdered? It's not so simple as it sounds in most cases."

"I wish that things would be different."

"As do I."

A comfortable silence settled in, and they both fell asleep. Much later, there was a loud bang that startled them both awake. Severus was up before she realized what was happening.

"Get dressed! Now!"

She grabbed a nearby robe and tossed it on over her nightgown. There was another loud bang. "What's going on?"

"The wards!" he said, completely dressed and stalking forward. "Someone's breached them!"

"God! Severus, wait!" Was it the Ministry? Other Death Eaters? The Order?

"Silence! We don't know who it is," he said warningly, grabbing her arm and making her stay behind him as he led her out into the darkened main room. In a whisper, he added, "Whoever it is has no idea we've been alerted. They will be entering soon. Come, I will hide you."

"No!" she said firmly. "I won't leave you."

"Be quiet, girl! Your mouth could cost us our lives."

She remained silent as he dragged her to the broom closet next to the bathroom. When he pushed her inside, he said, "I'll be back for you. The door will remain hidden to anyone but me."

As he closed the door, she reached out and grabbed his hand, saying nothing and simply squeezing it. He nodded and then he was gone. It was then that she realized her entire body was shaking. Who was there? Was she about to be saved or killed?

Saved.

If it were the Order or Aurors, what would happen to Severus? She thought of Harry's anger and loathing for Snape. Severus might be killed! Should she do as he said and stay there, or should she try to go help him? But how could she help him with no wand? And what if it was someone who wouldn't care about hexing or killing her? The Lestranges were out. Maybe they'd come back to finish them. That could have been their mission!

"No," she whispered, "they wouldn't have set off the wards."

She shrunk back against the wall of the closet, straining to hear anything that might happen. She didn't have to wait long, for there was a loud slam and a bang right after, repeated by another bang and a thud on the floor. She'd seen the flashes of light beneath the crack in the door and stifled her surprised yelps. Who'd been hexed? Was Severus all right? Who were the intruders?

"Got you now, you slimy git!"

Ron.

"Get up! Face me!" he yelled angrily.

Hermione barely recognized his voice. It was filled with such anger, and it seemed deeper somehow. Surely she'd not been away that long! Oh, no! Severus! She had to stop him from hurting Severus. It was obvious that he'd struck Severus down, but how? Severus had been expecting someone to burst in. Why wouldn't he have the upper hand?

"Using Draco as a shield then? I might have known you were a coward, Weasley," Severus said coldly.

This puzzled Hermione. Why would Draco be with Ron? Had the Malfoys asked the Weasleys for help? She needed to make herself known, but she was afraid to leave without knowing exactly what was happening.

"It's what he's good for, isn't it?" Ron said. "Not such a big man without your wand, eh, Snape?"

"I'm not afraid of you, boy."

"Where is she?" Ron asked again, voice rising.

"Who?"

"You know who! Hermione!"

"She's not here."

"I'll trade you Malfoy for her. Tell me where she is."

"No."

"Have it your way then, Snape. Knew we couldn't trust your arse from the beginning."

Hermione heard the determination in his voice and knew that he was about to do something she wouldn't approve of. She had no choice but to show herself. As quickly as she could, she threw the door open and stumbled out into the now candlelit room.

"Ron! Stop!"

His wand was aimed at Snape, a deadly gleam in his eyes. The instant he saw her, his eyes softened.

"He's got you locked in a fucking closet? Bastard! Come here, Hermione."

She looked between Severus and Ron and knew that if she didn't go to Ron it would enrage him more, and then she'd be responsible for Severus getting hexed...or worse. She moved towards Ron and heard Severus snort. When she looked back at him, she could tell that he was hurt.

"And you were saying earlier?" he asked mockingly, anger evident in his voice.

"You've addled her mind for a last time, Snape!" Ron said firmly, holding out his free hand towards her. His eyes moved to Hermione for an instant, and he said, "I saw the memories. I know what he's been doing to you. Has you under a spell."

"Ron, listen to me," she said softly. "I can explain."

"No need. We'll work through everything. All right? You're safe now, and we'll send him off to Azkaban."

Draco moaned, causing Hermione to look down upon him. She gasped. "He's hurt! What did you do?"

"Snape hexed him right when we entered."

"Weasley, your gallant knight, used him as a shield upon entering."

"Worked, didn't it?" Ron said smugly.

Hermione bent down to check Draco's head. "He's bleeding. I can heal him. Where's his wand?"

Ron slipped his hand into his wand pocket and pulled out Snape's ebony wand. "Here's the git's wand. I dropped Draco's outside someplace when I made him come in. He bloody wanted to take off. I couldn't let him. Leverage, see."

The way he spoke, Hermione knew that he wasn't thinking straight. If anything sudden happened, Ron would hurt someone...possibly even himself. She took Snape's wand and pointed it at Draco for a moment and then swiftly aimed it at Ron, hitting him with a Stunning Spell.

"I'm sorry," she said, tears in her eyes.

Severus was at her side in an instant, snatching his wand from her and looming over Ron. He seemed shocked and pleased.

"He would have hurt someone," she said softly, not quite believing what she'd done. "I..." She'd chosen Snape over Ron, hadn't she? She closed her eyes painfully. This couldn't be happening. "Severus..."

"Silence. I'll deal with this. Help Draco," he ordered, reaching down and taking Ron's wand from his grasp. "Here." He handed the wand to her a moment later. "There is some Blood-Replenishing Potion in our stores. You'll need it."

"All right."

"He's really messed things up," Severus said, shaking his head. "He's lucky that nobody else is about."

However, as luck would have it, Rabastan Portkeyed into the room in the next instant. He looked around incredulously, taking in Ron's Stupefied form and Hermione's tending to Draco's head. "What the bloody hell is going on here? What did I miss?"

"Weasley came here attempting to trade Draco for Hermione."

"Shite."

"Indeed."

"Want I should take care of the whelp for you?" he asked, stepping towards them.

"No," Severus said. "Help Hermione with Draco."

"Draco must've told him where we were, little bastard. Never could withstand much pressure, that one," he mumbled, flicking his wand to levitate Draco and bring him over to one of the extra beds.

Hermione quickly grabbed a few potions and bandages, joining him at Draco's bedside. She then noticed that Rabastan had a bloodstain on his shoulder. "Are you all right?" she asked.

"I'll be fine. Just a little nick, this."

"Sure?"

"Aye, lass, but thanks."

She used her wand to clean away the blood from Draco's head and poured an astringent solution on his wound, causing him to moan loudly. "It's not too bad. Thankfully. With all the blood lost, I thought his wound was deep. Still, though, please hand me that bottle of Blood-Replenishing Potion. I'll give him a swig of it."

"Here you are," he said.

"Draco, I'm going to give you a bit of potion," she said softly, tilting his head up slightly with Rabastan's help. He drank it down without coaxing. "Good," she said, quickly wiping some salve on his wound to close it completely. "It won't get infected. I'm not sure of the exact spell, so I'll just put this bandage on until Severus can deal with it." A flick of the wand saw the cloth closed over his wound.

"Good work."

She smiled and went about checking to make sure nothing else was wrong with him while Rabastan walked over to where Severus had Ron. Hermione dared not look back. The accusation in Severus' eyes when she'd gone towards Ron instead of him kept playing over and over in her mind. Once Ron came to, he would probably have the same look in his eyes. Whose hurt look would haunt her more? Why had she done this? Ron would have given her the freedom she'd been wanting!

Hermione was so frustrated that she began to cry softly, wiping her eyes as quickly as she could, though not getting each of her tears before they fell. This was terribly wrong. She should have just... What?

"All right?" It was Severus.

She looked up and shrugged. "I don't know. I'm so... confused."

"You made the right decision, Hermione," he said softly, kneeling down next to her, opening his arms for her.

And all she wanted was to be held, to be told that all would be well. She fell into his arms and cried openly, enjoying the way his hands rubbed her back and hair, the way his deep voice soothed her. It all had happened so quickly. Ron had been so enraged that he obviously hadn't been thinking clearly. She'd done the first thing that came to mind...to save everyone from harm. Deep down, she knew that Severus wouldn't hurt Ron, and she wasn't sure what had happened to Draco, but he'd needed help. Ron, however, would have done something, being so edgy.

"Ssshh, love, don't cry," he said softly, pulling back to look at her. His black eyes were tinged with compassion as he wiped her cheeks with his thumbs. Then his lips were on hers, softly leading hers in a reassuring, gentle kiss. It was over all too quickly, and she heard Rabastan's snickering from across the room.

"Looks like she's moved on, eh, lad?"

She turned towards his voice and saw that Ron was sitting up, chained to the wall, and staring at her. There was loathing, disbelief, and hurt in his gaze. What had she done? "Oh, no..." The world began to spin before her eyes.

Severus pulled her up and carried her to their bedroom and placed her on the edge of the bed, kneeling between her legs and forcing her to look into his face. "Hermione, get yourself together. Now isn't the time for this."

"Did you see how he looked at me?" she asked mournfully, hating herself.

"He was a fool to come here," Severus said. "Had Rabastan not come home, I might have been able to help them. However, now, I don't know what will become of him. I must go to the Dark Lord about this."

"NO!" Both Ron and Draco would be killed! It would be her fault! Voldemort would torture them for information...he'd send Harry the memories to show him what a traitor she'd turned out to be. "You can't. Please."

"Keep your voice down," he hissed, holding her still. "It is out of my hands." With a small kiss, he stood and stepped away from her. "You will not regret this."

But she already did. She'd doomed Ron...Ron, who'd done nothing but loved her and had tried to save her. Would she ever be able to forgive herself? Her gaze went down to the wand still clutched in her hand. Ron's wand. She knew that she should use it to help him... before Voldemort came.

"Accio wand," Severus said smoothly. "I'm afraid I can't let you do that." With a turn of his heel, he was gone, leaving her alone in misery. She heard him walk over to Rabastan and tell him something, but she couldn't make out what.

The very air around her seemed to be throbbing in her ears, and her heart was beating madly, the words failure repeatedly sounded in her mind. The bile in her stomach forced its way out of her mouth, and she fell to the floor bonelessly, unable to remain lucid.

Southern's Notes: And this is what being hotheaded will get you (tsk, tsk, ickle Ronniekins). Hmmm. I can't say much, else I'll give things away. More up soon.