Balancing

Thank you to karelia for her wonderful beta work.

Severus looked emaciated, hanging from the demon's hand in nothing but his pajama pants. His skin was black, dry and desiccated, and his muscles looked shrunken as if he were burning away from within. However, the force of his magic was palpable as he focused his attention on his binding spell despite being captured by the demon he was trying to bind.

The demon shook him and the red fire snuffed out. Severus didn't seem bothered by that fact; he just lifted his wand and shouted, "Avada Kedavra!"

Hermione thrilled to the sound of his voice, but the green fire flowed over the demon's warty hide and dissipated.

FOOL! YOU CANNOT BIND ME OR KILL ME WITH YOUR TINY MAGICS! NOT HERE! THIS IS MY REALM!

"You cannot have her! I don't agree to this bargain!"

YOU DON'T HAVE TO AGREE. THIS IS BETWEEN THE WOMAN AND MYSELF. YOU ARE JUST A POSSIBLE REWARD. NOT A PARTICULARLY INTERESTING ONE IF I GET AN OPINION. It brought him up to its face and then turned toward Hermione. THIS MAN IS WORTH IT TO YOU? HE DOESN'T SMELL THAT IMPRESSIVE.

Snape kicked it in the snout, before hitting it with a Blasting Hex.

Hermione watched, helpless, as the demon shook Snape like a ragdoll. As soon as the shaking stopped, Snape pulled a silver knife out of his waistband with his free hand and plunged it into the demon's arm. It let go with a scream of rage, and Snape fell, only to be caught by another arm. He dangled upside down by a leg and twisted until he could see Hermione. The look he gave her was pure fury as he raised his wand.

The demon grabbed him by the arm, sending the green streak off in the wrong direction. Severus bellowed in frustration and began a litany of useless threats. The demon tapped him on the neck with a third hand, silencing him.

I SHOULD HAVE WAITED LONGER TO HEAL HIS VOICE. It turned to her and held Severus out to her by an arm and a leg. ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO SAVE THIS MAN? HE JUST TRIED TO KILL YOU, it said, plucking the dagger out of its forearm and tossing it away.

She closed her eyes and took several breaths to calm her racing heart. "Killing me would have released me from our bargain," she said in a voice full of boiling emotions. "He doesn't want me to serve in hell." Severus twisted his head to see her, and his expression broke her heart. "He loves me," she said. "And I love him." In that moment, she knew she meant it in every possible nuance of the word.

He looked at her with such disappointment.

The demon rumbled derisively. SO WHAT. NOW THAT HE IS HERE, I MIGHT JUST KEEP HIM TOO. YOU CANNOT ESCAPE IF HE IS HERE. YOU'RE TETHERED TO HIM. FOOL.

Severus attacked the demon with still more spells, bending his wrist and aiming at whatever part of the demon presented itself. All of them were ineffective.

When he tried to turn his wand on himself, the fiend began pulling him in two directions by his ankle and his wrist. Snape opened his mouth and screamed in silence. The tendons in his neck stood out like cords, and his chest heaved as he sucked in air to scream again.

All the numbness that she had cultivated throughout the entire exchange evaporated in that instant. The bubbling pain in her blood spiked back into a burn, and she screamed.

"Stop!" She aimed her wand at the demon, knowing it was irrational. "We made a deal! If you kill him, the deal's off! I will never release you, and you will spend the ages owing me and my descendants! The others that you owe will also torment you! I will give all of them your name, Harry and Ron and Neville! They will summon you to wipe their arses! They will force you to sing lullabies to their babies! Leave him alone!"

The demon didn't stop. There was a sickening pop as Snape's arm was dislocated, and his wand dropped from his hand.

"I agree!" she screamed. "Whatever the price is, I'll pay!"

The demon stopped immediately. It tossed Snape in the air and caught him with all four hands, hugging his back to its chest.

Snape dangled in its arms, looking at her in defeat. He shook his head sadly and mouthed, "No," over and over.

"Can you fix his arm?" she asked, staring at the horrifying shape of his shoulder.

YOU WANT A DEMON TO HEAL HIM? THAT IS ANOTHER THING ALTOGETHER.

"True. Then, can you just pull on his arm again? You'll like it. It will hurt him, trust me."

The demon smiled and jerked on Snape's arm. There was another stomach-turning pop and the arm went back into the socket. Severus fainted.

THAT DIDN'T LAST AS LONG AS I WOULD HAVE LIKED. PERHAPS I SHOULD DO IT AGAIN, the demon mused.

"No!" she screamed. "We're done here. Leave him alone."

It left off its appraisal of the ragdoll in its hands.

FINE.

The monster crushed Severus to its chest, and Hermione watched as the blackness flowed back into its body, revealing Snape's pale, sallow skin. His lip was bleeding where he'd bitten through it, and red marks that looked like they would turn to nasty bruises showed on his arm and neck. In the center of his chest, right over his heart, was the glowing imprint of her hand, where she had linked her heart to his.

The demon gave Snape one last look and then shoved him back into nothingness. Hermione swiped at the tears on her face.

"His wand. He brought it with him, you must return it."

HE BROUGHT THESE TEARS TOO, AND NOW THEY ARE ALL OVER ME. DO YOU WISH THAT I RETURN THEM AS WELL?

"Don't be an arse," she snapped.

It recoiled at this bit of lunacy, but picked up the wand and tossed it into the hole in the air it had created. It lifted up the knife and threw that as well.

"You better not have just stabbed him," she threatened.

The demon sank down until its massive face was on her level. OR WHAT, LITTLE ONE? WHAT WILL YOU DO? YOU WON'T FIND OUT UNLESS YOU RETURN TO YOUR PLANE AND BY THEN YOU WILL HAVE PAID THE PRICE. I GAVE YOU THE MAN FOR THE HORCRUX, BUT I GAVE YOU MY EYES FIRST WHEN WE FOUGHT IN THE HOSPITAL. I ACCEPTED THAT LOSS AS PAYMENT TO LESSEN THE BURDEN OF OWING YOU. It smiled, showing row after row of nasty teeth. NOW YOU OWE ME. SPARE ME YOUR THREATS. I DON'T THINK YOU WILL BE IN ANY SHAPE TO EXACT RETRIBUTION. I SHALL MAKE YOU SCREAM. YOU WILL BEG, AND PLEAD AND CRY OUT FOR HELP, BUT THERE SHALL BE NONE. YOU WILL GIVE ME WHAT I CRAVE. It lifted a hand from the ground and opened it to her in a mockery of courtliness. NOW, COME. IT'S TIME TO PAY.

She shuddered out a breath and nodded. Gripping her wand like a lifeline, she lifted her foot to step out of the center of the star.

A CONVOCATION HAS BEEN CALLED.

Hermione looked around for the owner of the deep, musical voice. She set her foot carefully down in place.

NO! THERE'S NO NEED FOR A CONVOCATION! WE HAVE A STRAIGHTFORWARD BARGAIN HERE! I WAS MORE THAN HONORABLE!

A CONVOCATION HAS BEEN CALLED.

Hermione tilted her head to the side, confused, as the demon raged, lashing the ground with its tail and beating the air with its wings.

VERY WELL, it spat.

The sulphurous cavern they were in faded into an endless expanse of nothingness. The only feature was the glowing red of the circle made from Severus' blood. The rest of it was just nothing. No floor, no ceiling. No mist, or swirling vapor. Nothing but muted light.

She looked at the demon, only to find the blindfolded Severus. He was completely black now, as he had been when the darkness had finally taken over his body. He was dressed in black robes and yet clearly was the same form the demon had taken when she'd first arrived. He was more masculine, muscular, wrong.

WHY HAVE YOU INTERFERED? the demon snapped, looking beyond Hermione with its bandaged face.

She turned and saw the Balion Bardo, standing placidly to the side. Grey, from head to toe. Again, this Severus looked androgynous.

WE HAVE AN INTEREST.

She turned again; the Balion Bardo hadn't been the one to speak.

A third Severus stood on the other side of her. This one was blinding white and the source of light in the nothingness. She couldn't see him clearly at all through the glare, even squinting. Her mouth went dry, and she had a sudden urge to kneel. He turned to her, and she felt the warmth of his gentle regard like a chaste kiss.

YOU ALWAYS HAVE AN INTEREST. THIS MEANS NOTHING TO ME, spat the demon. SHE CAME OF HER OWN WILL.

And she will pay the price of her own will. It is the price that we will enforce. You used subterfuge in the negotiations, thus opening the door to arbitration. This last was spoken by the Balion Bardo. There will be balance.

YOUR PRECIOUS BALANCE MEANS NOTHING! YOU INTERFERE!

We do not. The bargain is struck. The terms are agreed. However, the price you want exceeds your rights. There must be balance.

FINE! spat the demon. THEN I DEMAND THE OLD RULES.

IS THIS AGREEABLE? the angel asked her.

"What are the old rules?" she asked.

An eye for an eye, intoned the Balion Bardo.

Hermione looked at the demon wearing a ragged bandage over Severus' eyes and swallowed thickly. Deep down, she'd already known. She thought of the man who had tried to kill her to save her from this fate, and knew he was worth it. She bowed her head and whispered, "Yes."

The demon bellowed in triumph and lifted its hand, holding a rusty replica of Severus' silver knife. THEN COME TO ME, LITTLE ONE, AND PAY THE PRICE.

Hermione took a last look at the angelic Severus, who seemed sad and hurt, and yet... proud.

She took a step forward and the blood construct she'd been standing in hissed and spat as it broke apart and faded with a hollow scream. A small moan of terror slipped past her control, and she heard the demonic Snape cackle.

It grabbed her, setting her blood on fire. Her world exploded with pain as the knife sliced at her face. She shrieked. She was still screeching when it was done, as she held her hands to her bleeding face. She screamed and screamed, backing away from the demon until she bumped against another body. The pain was intolerable, the agony was crippling. There was no lessening now that it was over.

Hands came up and laid against her own, soft, gentle and filled with the warmth of healing. The pain vanished, and she could feel the itch as the blood dried and crumbled away under her hands.

IT IS DONE.

NO! the Demon roared. YOU CHEATED! YOU BASTARDS ALWAYS CHEAT! PAIN WAS SUPPOSED TO BE PART OF IT! WHY DO YOU CARE? SHE DOESN'T EVEN BELIEVE IN YOU!

IS IT NOT ENOUGH THAT SHE'S BLIND?

NO! I AM MORE THAN BLIND! NO ONE CARES FOR MY PAIN!

BROTHER, YOU WANT YOUR PAIN.

IT IS NOT ENOUGH!

She felt a rush of wind just before she felt the blows as the demon boxed her ears. Twin spikes of pain stabbed her as she went deaf. She grabbed at her head and curled in on herself, finally overwhelmed and hysterical.

Hands reached down and lifted her up. They were cool and impersonal, letting her go as soon as she had her feet under her and pulling her hands away before gripping her head over her ears.

There will be balance. The price has been set. The price is paid. The convocation is at an end. Go.

Hermione sobbed to hear the voice and felt her tears spilling out of her empty eyes and running down her face. She flinched from the rush of air that accompanied the two loud pops of vacuum.

They are gone. It is done. You please us, Hermione Granger. Go. Live your life. You have succeeded.

"And Severus?"

He will live his. Whether he preserves the nexus is unknown. Once he knows you are safe, he must chose between your love or your betrayal. We do not know which he will cleave to.

Her heart gave a slow, painful thump at these words. "Will I ever see again?"

Do you already regret your bargain?

She shook her head. "Not if he lives."

Your eyes are lost forever, but not everyone needs them to see.

She sighed. She had barely enough strength to stand, never mind argue philosophy. "Thank you. For fixing my ears."

There is a price. The avatar of Light exceeded their duty. It is hard for them to be near suffering. Balance had to be restored. Remember this. For if one of the others Sonneillon owes asks for your loss to be restored, Severus Snape will pay the forfeit. Do you understand?

She nodded at this too, even if she didn't completely. "How do I leave this place?"

You already anchored yourself. Let go.

"Will I meet you again?"

No. For you, balance was temporary. Being caught between actions is anathema to your nature.

"Oh."

Farewell, Hermione Granger.

She twisted her head around, foolishly hoping for a last look. "Good bye."

She felt another pop and another rush of wind, and knew she was alone. She gripped her wand, concentrated on Severus, and let go of the terror, the pain, the grief, and even the sour joy of triumph, and felt herself snatched away.

She landed on her hip, and her breath rushed out in a whoosh, just before she cracked her head on something hard. The last thing she heard before she lost consciousness was Draco Malfoy yelling, "Bloody hell!"

Hermione woke up in total darkness and flailed.

"Hermione?"

"Lavender?"

"Yeah, it's me. I'm sorry, I was just bringing you some more flowers. These are from Cho Chang. Are you alright? How do you feel?"

"Like I've been hit in the head with a spanner. I'm in St. Mungo's then?"

"You are. Draco brought you in yesterday."

"And Severus? Where is he? Is he alright?" She sat up and reached out towards the voice, banging her hand against something cool and hearing glass shatter.

"Oops, well that was an ugly arrangement anyway. They were from Human Resources." Hermione felt a swirl of magic and the wet dripping sound stopped. "The professor's fine. Not a speck of black anywhere, not even a Dark Mark. He's upstairs. Draco brought him in as well. Did you know you're now listed as Snape's next of kin? Anyway, he was a right mess. He'd been stabbed in the arm, had torn tendons from one end of his body to the other, and a nasty case of whiplash, but nothing a potion and a good night's sleep didn't cure, I'm sure. His vocal cords healed. That was unexpected. He looked like hell, though. Bruises everywhere. You look a bit like hell yourself. What happened to you two?"

Hermione let out a ghastly laugh, reaching up and feeling the bandage over her eyes. "Hell, actually." She shook her head. "I don't know where to begin to explain."

She felt a warm hand squeeze hers. "You don't have to if you're not ready." Lavender took a deep breath. "Hermione, about your eyes..."

"I know. They can't regrow them, can they?"

"No. They did try."

"It's alright. It was the price I paid to heal Severus." She scrubbed a hand through her hair. "Do you happen to know if I still have a job?"

"I assume so, though smashing the flowers your department sent wasn't politic. No one's said otherwise."

"Well, that's something. Not very politic to run off and maim yourself after your first day."

Lavender squeezed her arm. "You went all Gryffindor idiot, didn't you?"

She gave a harsh laugh. "Absolutely. Was there ever a doubt?"

"No. You always styled yourself a Ravenclaw, but that just meant you did a hell of a lot of reading before you went rushing off like a fool."

The two chuckled, and Hermione felt a tremendous weight lift off her. She smiled sadly. "I don't think I'll be reading any more books or charging off anywhere."

"Nonsense. There are charms that will read a book aloud for you, and spells that will chime when you're walking in the wrong direction from the place you want to go. That's just off the top of my head. We'll get you through this, Granger. You'll see. There's all sorts of things we can do to help you learn how to deal." She felt Lavender's knuckles brush her cheek. "Don't despair. Leave that for Ravenclaws too."

Hermione gave her a smile. "I don't think I will, beyond a little self-pity and frustration. It was worth it, so there's no sense whining about it, right?"

"Exactly. Now, did you want to look like a banshee? Or would you like me to fix your hair? The bruises on your face are bad enough."

"Oh, fix it, please."

Personally, Hermione couldn't have given a damn about her hair, but she knew Lavender wanted to repay a kindness, and it was easier to let her. She shifted on the bed, trying to keep some modesty in the flimsy, backless, hospital robe, while Lavender stroked through her hair with a soft-bristled brush.

She sat with her darkness and tried not to despair. It wasn't easy. If she couldn't read, she couldn't do her job. She was probably in trouble with Kingsley for lying to him and then running away with Severus. And then there was Severus. She'd saved him, but the last look he'd given her was one of terrible betrayal.

She took a deep breath and let it out. The positives were pretty powerful. She was alive, and so was he. If he never spoke to her again, it was still worth it. At least he could speak.

Although the idea of him never speaking to her again sent her sliding back toward despair.

Lavender tugged on her hair as she twisted it into a knot at the back of her head. "There. Now you look human again."

"Thank you." Hermione reached up and patted her hair lightly. "I'm going to need you to teach me how to control this hair while blind, you know."

Lavender patted her arm. "I can do that. I'll think up a few other things to help you too. Perhaps charming your clothes so you can tell what color they are by feel. Give me a few days to work on it. I can ask Cho, too. She's wicked with charms."

"What would Michael think about that?"

"Pfft. I dumped him. He kept whining that I was spending too much time with Draco. It was rather novel, actually. I'd never dumped anyone before."

Hermione felt the bed shift as Lavender stood up. "Listen, speaking of Draco, he's outside waiting. It would be good of you to let him know you're alright. He's a wreck, and I think he's been through too much already."

"Of course! Absolutely."

"Good. I'll check on you later, then."

Hermione listened to Lavender's footsteps as she crossed the room. The door swung open and her friend exchanged a few words with Draco before she heard heavier steps coming closer. The door swung shut, muffling most of the bustling noise from the hospital.

"Hello, Granger."

"Draco. Come in, have a seat. Is there a seat?"

He gave a dry laugh. "Yeah. A couple of them, actually. They gave you a much nicer room than they gave me."

"I earned it in bedpans."

She waited until she heard the creak of a chair and then she said, "I'm grateful that you were there, Draco. How did you find us?"

He snorted. "Use your brain, Granger. Snape's house is Secret Kept. Who's left to keep the secret? I knew where he was when Lavender told me she couldn't tell me where you lived."

"Oh. That makes sense. How did you end up in the right place at the right time?"

There was an uncomfortable silence for a long moment after that. "Well, I was due, wasn't I? I've been in the wrong place at the wrong time often enough." The chair creaked. "I was worried. I was afraid you wouldn't be able to go through with it. I...I went there to kill Snape."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

She let that sit a moment and then said, "That was well done. I'm glad you failed, but it was very brave of you."

He sighed. "Honestly? My bravery evaporated as soon as I saw him. He was terrifying to see, all black and trying desperately to summon a demon. He didn't spare me more than a glance. I nearly shat myself when that huge arm came out of nowhere and snatched him away by the neck. I didn't know what the hell to do. I stood there like a useless lump until he came flying back out of the air looking like himself again a few moments later. I got pegged in the head by his wand and nearly skewered with a knife a moment after that. I'm afraid I cowered for a while, waiting for more things to come flying out of nowhere." He paused to take a heavy breath. "Then you appeared."

"I heard you yell," she said, "just before I fainted."

"I nearly fainted too," he admitted. "You cracked your skull on the fireplace. I thought you were dead." There was another awkward silence before he said, "So you didn't have to take his place?"

"No. That wasn't his price. Just this," she said, waving her hand at her bandage. She reached out her hand toward his voice and heard the chair creak just before he took it. "It wasn't completely yours either. Your mother is only serving for a limited time, and from what I gathered, her job is to help punish Voldemort. It seems the demon thinks she's a shrewd haggler. As for your father... He's not there."

The hand in hers clenched, and she heard him suck in several breaths. She clung to his hand with both of hers and held on as he struggled to pull himself together.

"Thank you," he said in a hoarse voice. "That means a lot."

"I know. It meant a lot to me, and I didn't even really know them."

Draco pulled his hand back, but not before a last squeeze. "So," he said with forced humor. "I guess you do love my godfather after all."

She felt a blush creeping up her face. "I do. Stupidly, I didn't fully realize it until I saw him dangling upside down from the demon's hand trying to kill me so I couldn't agree to any bargains."

Draco snorted. "How romantic."

"Laugh all you want, but I happen to think it rather was." She frowned. "Of course, he was very put out that I disregarded his wishes and broke my promise. I betrayed him. I suspect he might just decide he's well shut of me."

Draco barked a laugh. "Turn his back on a girl foolish enough to literally go to hell and back for him? You don't know him very well. "

Hermione folded her hands in her lap with a sigh. "That's just it. I don't. Not actually. And he doesn't really know me either. We just sort of threw ourselves at each other when we thought he was dying. Now he's not."

"That does make it a bit complicated."

"Exactly. I think he's going to need a bit of time."

"And you?"

"No. I don't need time at all. I fancy the socks off him."

Draco laughed. "You're barking."

"No, just insecure. I'm not sure when I fell for him, but it was a lot sooner than I let myself see. I think I was so overwhelmed that I made myself numb, but under it all, my heart just went right on feeling what it felt. I just hope I didn't ruin everything."

She heard his chair creak again. "Look, Snape's a bastard, but he's as loyal a bastard as a Slytherin gets, and he never forgets a favor. I think saving his life will earn you a rather special status. If you really managed to get close to him before you saved him, then I would say you probably don't need to worry overmuch."

"That's good to know," she said. "Do you know if the Ministry is still after him? What about the other Death Eaters?"

"I got kicked out of his room when some Aurors showed up to question him. I did manage to gather that he wasn't in trouble before they put up a Silencing Charm. As for the others, a group of Unspeakables turned up at Azkaban yesterday. They tried to keep it quiet, but you know how the Prophet works. Basically, there are no other Death Eaters anymore. No one seems to care too much."

"Oh."

"Yeah. You were right to take him out of here when you did. After the demon turned up again in Ipswich, no one was in an understanding mood. They wouldn't have cared he was a hero."

Further conversation was stopped by the entrance of Healer Pye. "Hello, Miss Granger! You've been a busy girl, going undercover so you could save more lives. Such an exciting life you lead. How are you feeling? Miss Brown told me you had a bit of a headache, that's to be expected..."

Draco and Hermione made their good-byes with a promise to talk again soon.