Chapter Twenty-eight: Men Are From Mars; Women Are From Venus

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Chapter Twenty-eight: Men are from Mars; Women are from Venus

Hermione groaned and forced tear-swollen lids apart the next morning as her alarm clock squealed its disapproval of her tardiness. A splash of cold water drove the last of her hard-won sleep from her mind, and a quick shower served to restore her appearance to somewhere near normal.

Sitting before her mirror, brushing her hair, she remembered the stunned silence in the headmistress's office after Snape's hasty departure.

It had been several seconds before Minerva McGonagall had closed the Charter of Hogwarts with a snap and harrumphed her disapproval.

"I see. You would do well, Miss Granger, to take heed of Professor Snape's wishes. Attend your classes and work hard for your N.E.W.T.s. If anything is to become of this relationship of yours, it will have to wait until you finish your schooling."

Hermione had reined in her hurt and pasted a cold smile on her face. "With all due respect, Professor McGonagall, I do not believe you are in a position to advise me in such matters. If I may excuse myself?"

Ignoring the shocked older witch, Hermione had managed to maintain her composure until she was well away from the spiral staircase. Even then, she had only allowed a few tears to trickle down her cheeks as she returned to her room through mealtime-empty corridors.

Locking and Silencing her door, Hermione had finally unwrapped the tight seal on her emotions, allowing her face to crumple and tears to flow in earnest.

"Dammit!" Tossing the brush aside after it caught on yet another tangle, Hermione stood and walked over to her window. As if nothing momentous had occurred, the predawn winter landscape glistened with frost and crisp night air. Lights twinkled in the dark from various windows around the castle, indicating the gradual stirring of its inhabitants. Leaning against the cold glass, Hermione took several slow, cleansing breaths.

I will not let them win.

Well, if that's the way he wants to play it.

Resolving not to reveal any weakness before the headmistress, her friends, or her would-be lover, Hermione steeled her expression and left her room, head held high.

"Oh, there you are, Granger. We wondered where you'd disappeared to at dinner last night. If Luna hadn't seen the headmistress's house elf come to fetch you, we'd have sent out a search party by now." Blaise linked arms with Hermione as she passed through the common room, his teasing words partly belied by the worried frown creasing his brow.

Hermione shrugged. "I came back to my room before you lot had finished eating. I had study to do."

"And that doesn't explain why you didn't answer the door when we knocked." He turned her to face him and tipped her chin up with one finger. "Or those puffy eyes. What happened, Hermione?"

She shook his hand away. "Nothing I want to talk about at the moment." Meeting the concern in his dark eyes, she sighed. "Please, Blaise."

Always sensitive to her moods, Blaise nodded and reached for her hand. With a gentle squeeze, he asked, "Want me to keep the others off your back for a while?"

"Could you?"

"No worries. Now, let's go and eat. I'm starving."

At that, Hermione had to smile. "You're starting to sound like Ron."

Avoiding Snape's gaze at breakfast was easier than she had expected. He was nowhere to be seen. Blaise's raised eyebrow as he followed her gaze to the empty seat at the staff table met with no response.

Shrugging, the Slytherin loaded a plate with food and placed it in front of Hermione. "Eat, Granger. We have Potions this morning. You'll need all the fortification you can get, I suspect."

Hermione managed a grim smile despite the sudden pallor of her face. Picking up her fork, she attacked the bacon with a vengeance. "Perhaps I will at that."

***

Deep in the dungeons, Snape's plate was less fortunate. Shattered into tiny pieces beside the hearth with bacon and eggs strewn across the floor, it spoke volumes for the mental state of the room's occupant, currently pacing the room and muttering to himself.

"Damned Minerva. Damned Charter. Damned rules! Married? At her age? Bloody ridiculous!"

Turning on his heel, Snape felt the crunch of broken china and squelch of pulped food under his foot. Grimacing at the mess, he Vanished the lot and continued his rant in silence.

I've spent my fucking life following orders. Does Minerva really expect me to marry solely because a fucking thousand-year-old book decrees it? This one thing, one bloody thing, I'd finally expected to decide for myself. At the right time.

Damn them all.

Snape's relentless motion came to a sudden halt as his brain caught up with his meandering thoughts.

Shite. I really do want to marry her.

Where did that come from?

***

Snape entered the classroom from his office and stood in front of his desk in silence, his grim expression daring any foolish student to speak out of turn.

"Today you will complete the Contraceptive Draughts you left in stasis last week. The instructions are on the blackboard. As most of you are likely to benefit from the use of this potion at some stage in the near future, I trust you have all endeavoured to research the next stage in the brewing process over the weekend and will not have any mishaps. Is that correct, Mr Longbottom?"

Neville met Snape's eye and nodded calmly. "Yes, sir." Four months of working with Draco Malfoy had finally succeeded where five years of Hermione's well-intentioned enthusiasm hadn't. Neville had realised he was quite a capable brewer, given the right incentive. And the blond's skilled hands and confidence in his ability had been exactly the incentive he had needed.

"Then begin. I expect a satisfactory sample from each work station by the end of the class." Without a glance in Hermione's direction, Snape sat behind his desk and reached for the inevitable pile of essays there.

She's ignoring me. Why can't she see I'm only thinking of her? Protecting her. If we married now, her reputation would be ruined and her integrity in question. Her N.E.W.T. results would prove she gained no favour from me, but the stain would linger. It always does.

I must talk to her.

"I can see why he was such a good spy." Blaise tilted his head toward the apparently unperturbed Potions professor twenty minutes into the lesson. "Whatever's going on between you two hasn't seemed to interrupt his classroom demeanour."

Hermione shrugged and kept her head down as she shredded and chopped. "Maybe he doesn't care."

"Bollocks." Blaise smirked. "I said 'seemed'. He keeps glancing over here through his hair. And he hasn't written so much as a word on that essay in the last fifteen minutes. For what it's worth, I'd say he's just as upset as you are, Granger."

Shoulders relaxing just a little, she chanced a peek in Snape's direction to catch his dark gaze fixed on her face, the unmasked longing she found there striking deep into her heart. Looking away before she could betray herself, Hermione resolutely focussed on her brewing, thankful her potion had reached a critical stage allowing no distraction. By the time she set her stirring rod aside and turned the heat down to a gentle simmer, Snape had left his desk and was stalking around the opposite side of the classroom.

Once her potion was complete, Hermione hurried to the front of the class to deposit her sample on Snape's desk while he was otherwise occupied. As she placed the vial in the waiting rack, familiar fingers closed over hers, and a warm, lean body pressed against her back. A surge of desire so intense, so primitive, had her biting her lip to stifle the soft moan threatening to draw the attention of her classmates.

"We need to talk, Hermione."

The very fact he had used her given name in class, albeit in a low murmur which caressed her ear, almost melted her resolve.

Almost.

Pulling her hand from beneath his and stepping away from his plea took all her strength.

"You had your chance to talk yesterday. You chose not to."

Glancing over his right shoulder at the class still busy bottling and labelling their samples, Snape shook his head. "I know. I merely... Dammit, Weasley, can't you watch where you're going!"

Ron, having approached Snape from his left, watched in horror as his sample oozed in long, viscous strands from the back of his professor's robes down to the floor, forming an impressive puce puddle by his boots.

Not waiting to find out what manner of punishment Snape meted out to the horrified redhead, Hermione gathered her books and bag and left the classroom, uncomfortably aware of the large part of her sighing in relief at the seemingly innocuous nature of Ron's brew, despite its variance from the pure magenta a correctly brewed Contraceptive Draught should display. Anger at the man's pig-headedness did not equate to wishing him harm.

***

"Damn, damn, fuck, damn and... and... damn!" Snape slammed the door of his office closed and threw his potion-sticky robes in the general direction of the bathroom. "Bloody Weasley!"

Slumping into his armchair, he allowed himself a good ten minutes to brood, then summoned enough motivation to find a new set of robes for his next class.

First years. Oh, joy. Why do I do this job again? That's it. For the satisfaction of nurturing eager young minds into capable adults.

What a load of shite.

Several mind-numbingly tedious hours later, Snape returned to his quarters to eat alone once more. Despite avoiding her eyes and Minerva's smug smile, he pushed his food around his plate and tasted little of what actually reached his mouth. Leaving the dishes to the house-elves, Snape tossed back the rest of the glass of wine he had in his hand and headed for temporary oblivion amongst his paints and brushes.

***

He didn't show for any meals again today. I hope he's all right. Hermione rested her chin on her left hand as she picked at her meal. I know I'm supposed to be angry with him, but I can't stop worrying. Perhaps I should go and see him.

"I know that look, Granger. You're about to give in. Don't you think it's time you let him make the first move?" Blaise leaned back in his seat and cocked an eyebrow at the anxious witch beside him.

Hermione sighed and pushed her plate away. "He did. Or he tried to in class on Monday. But Ron... interrupted."

"So you ran away? That's not like you." Blaise's tone gentled as he laid his hand on hers. "I know you said you didn't want to talk about it, but maybe I can help."

Hermione turned her palm to Blaise's and offered a small smile. "Let's go back to my room. It's time I told you what happened."

***

Stepping back from the easel, Snape wiped a bead of sweat from his brow with a paint-stained finger. Hermione's eyes mocked him from the canvas as he sagged into the chair in the corner of the room, resting his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.

What am I doing? I have no right to paint her like that. Not after what I said.

She doesn't understand why I can't marry her yet.

He studied his latest work with a critical eye. Despite feeling his life was spiralling out of control, it was his best painting yet. He had caught Hermione's essential nature in bare strokes of pigmented oils: inquisitive, determined, passionate, loving.

Passion for him. Loving him.

His brushes hit the floor with a clatter as an unwelcome conclusion suddenly prevailed in the morass of emotions swamping Snape's brain.

Fuck! She believes I don't want to marry her at all! She must think I only wanted her for her body. No wonder she's furious.

I have to find her and make her listen to me.

The corridors of Hogwarts loomed dark and lonely as Snape prowled, watching and waiting for his opportunity to no avail. Hermione had been nowhere to be seen all evening, not even in the library.

Fists clenched at his sides, Snape stopped to lean against the cool of the stone wall for a few moments. Decision made, he headed for the senior students' common room.

***

"Have you talked to him yet?" Blaise asked as he claimed Hermione's chair and put his feet up on her desk.

On the bed, Hermione rolled onto her side and put the book she had been reading aside. "I've barely seen him. You know he disappears into his office as soon as Potions is finished, and he's hardly been to any meals for weeks. How can I talk to him if he's nowhere to be found?"

"You could always go down to the dungeons and see him there."

"I know. It's just..." Hermione sat up, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. "... I don't know whether I'd be welcome."

"Don't be daft, Granger. He did say he wanted to talk to you." Blaise walked over to the bed and sat beside Hermione, wrapping one arm around her shoulders. "And since when has my favourite Gryffindor let a little thing like a grumpy Potions master stop her?"

Leaning into Blaise's comfort, Hermione sighed. "I'm not afraid of him. I suppose it's more fear he will tell me it's all over; he doesn't want me any more."

Blaise shook his head. "You've really overthought this, Hermione. You know he loves you. You know he wants you. Merlin only knows what's going on inside his bloody head, but I guarantee he hasn't suddenly decided he'd be better off without Hermione Granger in his life."

She smiled, then kissed his cheek. "Thanks, Blaise. You always know exactly what to say."

"You're not the only know-it-all at this school, you know."

A peremptory knock at the door startled them both.

"Who's that? I thought Luna and Ginny had gone back to their dorms."

"No idea." Another knock disturbed the silence of the late evening. "Shouldn't you answer that before whoever it is wakes everyone else in the dorm?"

Hermione swung the door open to find an impatient Severus Snape standing outside her room with a pale-faced Ron alongside.

"Sorry, Hermione. He insisted I show him which room was yours," Ron whispered as he slunk away.

Snape waited until Ron had disappeared back into the common room before meeting her eyes. "Well, are you going to invite me in?"

Stepping back into the room, Hermione gestured for him to enter. His lips had almost curved into a smile, then he spotted Blaise Zabini lounging on one elbow on Hermione's bed.

***

A/N: This was written for shalimar1981 for the TPP Every Flavour Auction. Thanks as always to quaffswinegaily for her input and karelia for her beta skills. Love you both!