I'm re-reading it, I like this story, and I absolutely love a dark, morally grey, baddie Severus, but unfortunately there are not many fics where he is actually bad or morally grey.

I'm re-reading it, I like this story, and I absolutely love a dark, morally grey, baddie Severus, but unfortunately there are not many fics where he is actually bad or morally grey.

There are no words I could use to describe the feelings that have now engulfed me after reading not only the story of Hermione and Severus but yours as well.  I can only offer the sincere sorrow I feel in my heart for the tragic events that have happened.  I can honestly say that I could not fathom any kind of abuse in that way and do not pretend to know what it is that you or anyone else has gone through.  I can only hope that with time and distance that you can somehow learn to live with and be able to deal with what has happen and try and find some joy in this life and not let it define you. I have not experienced the tragedy  you have had but I have had my own tragic experience.  I know and can understand the feeling of being less than what you were and the feeling of never really being able to feel whole again. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

DAMN IT I hope Sn ape just wont get away with this! I would so hate it, if he does I wll jus thave to imagine some gruesome death myself. Hermione, run away as fast and as far away as possible get back to strength then get back and kill him slosly an dpainfully. Bah this was anti-climatic. Hermione has not been able to confront him and Snape was able to die a hero, to the world at least she will now never be able to talk about it. How will she ever get well now? Come on Snape show some of that strength and keep yourself alive till Hermione can finish the job. I dont think I oculd have ever forgiven him, no way. Well at least he found his conscience at last, i hope Hermione will be able to recover from the damage, however. I dont think she would ahve returned to him, fervently do not hope so, though some women do return ot their abusers... Harry should read that letter, hasnt he noticed in her behaviour that something is wrong... I hoped they could talk about it, but maybe not... I am happy Hermione found happiness in the end, even if Harry doesn tknow. I hope she will be able to cope, i just find it so hard that she has to bear it all alone and has no outlet for it. Again, I never could have forgiven Snape.
I have had some disturbing experiences in my youth as well so its a bit sensitive. I recently watched a movie called the war zone (199) and it was the most disturbing thing I had ever watched.

Shit, he has probbably been in a battle with HArry, why cant Hermione go that last bit and know snape is betraying htem all, but that woul dundo her I think, still with her critical mind she would be able to see it. Now she is helping him get well again so he can attack them again.... I cant believe poppy is talking to hermione in this way! Also Snape is NOT helping htem. I hope she finds this out, i so hope she does. God I hate it when people say it is your own fault ofr wearing certain clothes NO IT IS NOT! Snape had NO RIGHT to do what he did to Hermione and he bloody well knows it too. Oh how can people be this way? I really dont understand bloody poppy she should know better, Hermione is a child still oh her body is mature enouigh... I hope Hermione will get her bloody revenge on everyone! I hate them all! I was happy that you put that note below the chapter because you understand the situation is not as it should be (duh of ocurse it is not) but with poppy I mean. I hope she finds out about Snapes other treacheries and then sets the whole house on fire. This is the most disturbing fic I have ever read just because of the psychological contents. I have read A LOT of stuff, ahve been into ss/hg for 9 years now or so but this just tops it all. I am going to take a shower after I finish reading the lats chapter because now I cant stop, I just cant bear it if Hermione would have to stay there all of her life literally in hell. I also am so disappointed in Minerva although indeed Snape can be believable I guess. I hope at some point his conscience will kick in if he has any left, i doubt it though, he is beyond salvation. I think this is even worse then a typical rape.

I wodner how anyone can NOT be bothered by molestation and rape. I wonder if Snape was a traitor to the order or if Vodlemort just foind another way to win, the situation was precarious after all... Hmm bu tI guess this was written before dh so Snape might just be a follower of voldemort after all. Yes, in this situation I guess who could Hermione tell? No friends are around to tell... She is alone, god the desolation of it all, the misery. I hate Snape like htis sure I think he is a bastard and a petty bully but not like this... Shit she really should confront the fucking bastard, he really thinks she is sleeping. I hope she will kill him. I so hope Hermione will find out what Snape is doing, i eman that he is not helpin gharry and that she will totally loose herself and kill him, her spirit has to be somewhere... Yes gets away from him AND kill shim, he does not deserve to be left alive. I think Snape would enjoy exploit in a certain way, i think In-canon snape has honour through and has not gone completely to the dark side.

I have never really been into first-person perspective fics because for some reason they tend to be more difficult for me to get into. A third person (in the past, past tense I eman) always seem to work best for me to get into a story. But in this case maybe its best because you really know hwat hermione is going through. This really is disturbing htough, wow. I wodner why Hermione cant tell anyone, what the situation in general is. I guess I will find out, sigh... I wonder why she doesnt FUKCINGhex his balls off. Why doesnt she do anything..... Why doesnt sxhe at least yell at him... this shouldnt be so easy for him... he should know that what he is doing to her is unwanted and how much she hates him for it. Snape has been a spy for so long, how can he assume she is sleeping that would just b ethick. I wonder how he can be so careless at all, I mean if he really felt he had to do this then why not at least obleviate her afterwards... Not that I condone what he is doing dont get me wrong... And why in the hell doesnt she do something... It really freaks me out. Sorry not meaning to flame or anything. I think she should confrotnate him and yell at him tell hem what he is doing to her fucking kick him in the guts. She should NOT be just passive through this and let him pretend that she is not real. Maybe she cant tell anyone else although I doubt it but she can tell him in no uncertain terms. I dont udnerstand why she did not do this the first time it happened, tell him / hex him..... I just cant understand it, I know this kin dof stuff happens to peopl ebu tI thought it all started at an earlier age and I certainly did not think something like this woul dhappen to headstrong Hermione. I jus thope she gathers the strength and courage to put a stop to this and that she gets her revenge on him. I just really hope she will get out of this and get her revenge on Snape
I have read quite a few darkfics but I think this one is maybe the most disturbing of them all.

"Hermione’s new relationship with Harry is plausible in this story (they only have each other). I think she just needed time to realize that Snape was no longer there and couldn’t touch her or force her to do anything she didn’t want to do."This statement, while you know it to be true, I can also attest to its validity. My husband and I slept in the same bed for nearly 2 years before he woke up without bruises. Poor man couldn't even attempt to wrap his arms around me while I slept without me lashing out at him.This is a very different view, and a very emotional one at that. The added element of being blamed for enticement makes it even more so.Well written, as always. Even when the content is disturbing--which makes it more difficult to write well.

I'm glad I decided to read your story.  Generally, I really dislike anything non-con and won't even go there.  As far as my experiences go, I feel like you've got everything right here and it was nice to read someone who actually knws how to properly handle the subject.  Thank you. 

Good story. Cried when Severus died.

Very disturbing indeed...  Interesting Snape POV...

i hope you found this somewhat cathartic to write.  thank you for sharing that tender part of yourself with us.

i hope you found this somewhat cathartic to write.  thank you for sharing that tender part of yourself with us.

Thank you says it all.

again your strength seems to be unlimited. when i was 14 i was abused. that pain will never leave. almost two years ago now i took an overdose with the intent of ending my life. but i woke up nd have re-built my life. harry potter for me was always an escape. an outlet that no one eles could touch or break.  i again solute you for being abel to write about something so personal. something i am not sure i could ever do. this story holds truth. however painfull that may be. your writing is a gift.abz x

i just wanted to say that i thought the courage and strength it must have taken to write this story and tell us about your past is amazing. iam so sorry that you had to go through that. i just wanted to say that i understand that pain and i solute u.x

What a difficult story this must have been to write. It was hard to read, but at the same time, it was brilliantly written. Kudos to you for tackling a difficult subejct. I am glad she and Harry found love.

Reading the story I have to say I did not feel much of anything, just numb, but finishing it now... I just want to cry, only I am not sure whether I am vrying for Hermione or you... or me. Or whether they are sad tears or tears fo relief.

I am sorry, honey, I wish no one would have to experience that and am totally blown away that you are able to write this and confide as you have, years later or not.

Poppy's reaction is so true, so believable. ONe always imagined others will react differently, leapt valiently to our aid and they often don't and it is heart-breaking.

I am glad Snape apologised in the end, though I doubt I would be able to feel the forgiveness Hermione expresses. Also glad Harry did not read the letter. Somehow it would not have turned out well, regardless of what his reaction was.

I love your other writing, and I am glad to wrote this one as well.

I. . . I don't really feel safe saying anything about this story. I can say that I really feel sorry for Hermione, although I know this doesn't even scratch the surface.

I am grateful that Snape realised it was wrong to take advantage of her, though. I'm glad he was sorry, and I think Hermione was very. . . kindhearted to forgive him. If that ever happened to me, I might've forgiven him, but not really. I mean, that sort of thing can't just be forgiven and brushed away. It lasts.

Well, I suppose I can say stuff. I really wasn't sure at first that I liked this story, but I also somehow feel that I needed to read it. It's good to know not everything on here is smut, though that has been proved to me other times. This was a very well-written story (if with a dark plotline), and I love your other stories.

Thank you for an. . . enlightening experience.

~Katie

very good story, although controversial. But no one can ignore these things. Even if it is many years later, it must've taken a lot of courage to write this.  I could never imagine this happening to me or anyone i know. But it does happen. Thank you.sincerely,Deborah

That was a very moving story and brought up rather horrid memories for me as well. All I'll say is that I have been called a cynic. I TRUST NO ONE except my mum, step-mum and dad. I'm VERY over-protective concerning my children, and though I know we can't always keep them safe, I have to do my best. Thank you for letting me bleed right along with the characters. 

Egad!  That was an incredibly moving story!  Woof, I'm all teary eyed now.  Very courageous of you to write--particularly the author's notes.    Strong work.

You so rock and are so brave for sharing with us...I am honored that you would be so forthcoming. Just know, I know it isn't much but, you are not alone. What has always helped me lots is realizing it could of always been worse, there is always worse. No matter my nightmarish stories are, reality always does me one better. My difficulties I feel have lead me to deep self awareness.   Not to mention an increadible black sense of humor. I find it hard to share with others especially ones who have never been abused. God it took a long time to get over just the horrible night terrors. I do know I can survive just about anything, not a very happy thought but it gives an ablity to enjoy life more. I have been to hell and walked through to the other side. I feel I really apreciate the sun shining or just looking at the moon etc. I am trying to work out some deep seated sh*t about mothers that abuse. It is horrible when you reach out for help and are met with hostility, or even the unwillingness to see the abuse. I just decided that whatever happened to me would stop with me and not be passed on to my kids, it was very generational. I feel that this darkness inside me has always drawn me to characters like Severus, maybe it is one wounded animal sensing another. Anyway if you have read this far... wow! Thanks again for sharing. You really are a great writer. 

That was truly beautifully written. I know it's a hard subject to brouch and it must have been hard for you to write. Kudo's to you. Cheers, Sonia

This is a good story. I read it several months ago, before I started making notes on the fanfiction I read and before I realized how important reviews are. Now I've found the story again, but I have not read it again. It is, as you say, difficult to read. But it is very good and touching. I remembered it easily after rereading the first two paragraphs.
Not that I can EVER imagine Ron or Harry in any way better for Hermione than Severus, but what do I know ;-)