Walls Come Crashing Down

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~o 16 o~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Walls Come Crashing Down

~June 4, 1997~

Filius burst into his office in a near state of panic. "Death... Death... in the school," he kept stammering, trying to say something, although he was breathless.

"Spit it out, I haven't all day..." Severus started to say, then froze, the full force of what Filius was trying to say finally hitting him. Draco – did he succeed! Did that insipid boy actually kill Dumbledore?

"Eaters – Death Eaters in the castle," Filius finally managed to get out.

Severus' mind whirled. Bloody hell! No! "Stay here, I'll..."

"Don't be daft, Severus! We have to fight! We have to save the children!"

Fight – you? And have an all out war on our hands! I don't think so. Severus whirled around in disbelief. The wizened old wizard was still breathing hard, gasping for breath after running down here to alert him of the attack. And he is going to go fight? He'll be killed for sure! Severus cared too much for Filius to lose him today. "Stupefy, Frigidulusileo Totalus," he said, saying the first spell much louder than the second. Filius fell to the floor as if he had fainted. "This is not for you to deal with. I'll handle this. Dumbledore and I expected something like this to happen. Stay here," he said and turned, running for the door.

As his luck would have it, he was stalled in the corridor by none other than Hermione and Miss Lovegood. "Professor, there are Death Eaters in the castle!" Hermione practically shouted.

"I'm aware of that, Hermione," he snapped. Oh, no. You're staying here. "See to Professor Flitwick; he has collapsed. I'll see to the invasion." He was pleased that she nodded and quickly entered his office. He took the time to ward his office to keep her inside. I'm not going to risk you running off to fight either. I finally have someone who truly loves me – someone I can love – and I'm not going to lose you, too.

Severus ran through the castle, racing toward the sounds of shouting, screams and explosions. Merlin's balls! A full invasion? If things go bad... Is Dumbledore back yet? He remembered Dumbledore's plea should Death Eaters invade the school, '...as little bloodshed as possible, Severus. I need you to protect the students at all costs, but do not blow your cover. This is important... I need you to stay in Tom's good graces...' Damn, could this be the final attack? Potter isn't ready! No, it can't be – I'd have been instructed...

He dodged a jet of yellow light that shattered the frame of a picture behind him and kept running. Bloody hell! "Watch it!" he snarled. Bill and Nymphadora were fending off Selwynn and Krauter as he passed. Severus fired off a Stunner as he ran, careful to make his spell only graze Nymphadora's robes, bounce on the floor, and ricochet up at the Death Eater behind her. He turned the corner, nearly getting caught up with the fight between Gibbon and Lupin. "Draco Malfoy, where is he?" he growled, not seeing the blond-haired boy anywhere.

"The tower, Snape – where else?" Gibbon shouted as Severus rushed past. "Oi, where..."

*

Hermione and Luna followed Professor Flitwick, running to help their friends and ran into Ginny in the corridor. "Where have you been?" Ginny asked as she ducked a jet of pale blue light. Hermione, Luna, and Professor Flitwick stopped short, wands drawn. Professor Flitwick's and Ginny's spells hit the Death Eater at the same time, making him fly back against the wall and crumble to the floor in a heap.

"Snape tried to lock us up in his office," Hermione said angrily.

"Here, drink this," Ginny suggested, thrusting a tiny bottle into Hermione's hand. "It's Felix Felicis. There is enough for each of you to have a large drop."

"Brilliant, Miss Weasley," Professor Flitwick exclaimed, beaming. "Fifty points to Gryffindor!"

Hermione swallowed a drop of the potion and then handed the phial to Luna. "Rather a moot point right now, isn't it, Professor?" she pointed out to him, although she was smiling, knowing that the Felicis would definitely sway things in their favor. "We're at war!"

"Good point, Miss Granger," he said, taking the bottle next, "but this will definitely turn the battle to our favor, won't it?"

*

McGonagall and one of the Weasley twins were fending off Travers and Lujan on the stairs, and Severus acted as if he were fighting his way through, although he deftly cast a Slicing Hex at Lujan immediately after a Shield Charm to protect Minerva. Hopefully he didn't catch that.

He sensed the Shield Ward at the base of the Astronomy tower, easily recognized by the tingle in his left arm. Severus held up his arm as he pushed through the ward and hurried up the tower stairs. The sight before him as he burst onto the top of the tower nearly made him sick. Dumbledore was barely able to stand, and two brooms lay on the stone floor, although the owner of the second broom was nowhere to be seen. He quickly searched for a slightly shimmering translucent form, which should've been pressed up against one of the merlons of the parapet. However, he didn't see any sign of someone hidden by a Disillusionment Charm. It must be Potter under his bloody cloak, then. Draco Malfoy was holding his wand out, pointed at Dumbledore's knees and gripping Dumbledore's wand in his other hand while four other Death Eaters stood guard. That idiot werewolf, Greyback was there as well, and he'd even had the audacity to be wearing Death Eater robes as if he was one of them. Insolent beast. Severus refocused his attention back on Dumbledore, aware that something was terribly wrong.

Severus watched the scene with absolute clarity and felt a sense of loathing rise up in him. It was time, just as Dumbledore had predicted, and he knew what was expected of him. That didn't stop him from hating the fact he had to be the one to do it.

'It has to be you, Severus. Please,' the soft voice echoed in his mind.

As if it's necessary to remind me! Damn you, Dumbledore!

"Severus," he heard Dumbledore plead with him. Dumbledore slid farther down the wall, his face sweaty, and his eyes, which had lost their twinkle, were beginning to become unfocused. The ragged breathing and the grotesquely pallid look of Dumbledore's face told him that the Headmaster had consumed a poison, and there wasn't anything he could do about it.

As the seconds ticked by, each feeling like minutes, Severus watched, taking it all in, yet finding no other solution. It won't take long now, he's completely at their mercy, too weak to fight or even to hold onto his wand. Shite, his death is imminent... I can't do anything else. All the scenarios he'd tried working out, all the alternates to Dumbledore's plan he'd considered hadn't accounted for this particular event. His eyes scanned the crenellation of the battlement for a second time, noting nothing else amiss.

"Severus... Please..."

Shite, if you'd taken me instead of Potter you'd – I'd have been able to care for you – save you. He didn't have time to think of anything, and there was no way out of this. I'll do this for you old man – rot for it. "Avada Kedavra," he said, ending the life of this century's most renowned wizard, his mentor and friend. Severus was revolted by his action, but knew he had no other choice. "We have to get out of here, quickly," he said to Draco. Without so much as a glance at the others, he grabbed Draco by the scruff and hauled him away.

*

Hermione dodged to the left just as a jet of sickly green light whizzed by her head. If it hadn't been for the Felix Felicis, she'd probably be dead, but the luck from the potion was literally guiding her, not only telling her which spells to cast, but directing her body movements as well. All she had to do was trust Felix and react to the suggestions as if they were her own thoughts and ideas.

Neville was fending off a Death Eater in the corridor behind her, trying not only to subdue the wizard but also protect Luna and Fred. Or it could be George, she supposed, but she was too engrossed in her own fight to be sure. Fred, or George, took off running as screams could be heard from some students, who had been cornered due to the fighting. Hermione smiled as Neville, who didn't hesitate to follow, fired spells blindly over his shoulder with amazing accuracy as he ran to help.

Hermione saw Severus dragging a stumbling Draco past her from the corner of her eye as she fought against a swarthy Death Eater, ducking his curses. A jet of red light shot from Severus' wand, nearly missing Luna, but hitting the Death Eater she'd been fighting in the foot, turning it into set of crab-like pinchers.

Severus looked Hermione's way and added a slyly cast Impediment Jinx, just as she fired off a Binding Hex. The Death Eater fell down, never once realizing that Severus had assisted her. She turned to thank him, but Severus was gone. Seconds later, Harry came running past, apparently chasing after Severus. A jet of blue light barely missed her shoulder and rebounded off a strip of lead on the stained-glass window behind her, hitting the Death Eater who'd cast the spell in the chest. He fell backward as Hermione pressed forward, stunning the man.

~June 4, 1977~

For the first time in ages, Potter and Black walked by Severus and didn't even bother to hex, jinx or curse him. Pettigrew, of course, saw him and crinkled his nose at Severus in disgust, but no one raised a wand. Naturally, Lily, Deborah, and Leanne were with them. Severus waited a few seconds, allowing a group of Hufflepuffs to pass between them before changing directions and following Lily, Potter, Black and friends to see where they were headed. The group exited the castle, obviously seeking the sunshine in the courtyard. Severus walked along the covered walkway, finding an arch in the wall that was partially obscured by a large camellia bush and sat down. He pulled a book from his bag so that it would not appear as if he was there to observe them, should they look up and see him. Lily sat down, and almost immediately, Potter sat next to her. Lily placed her hands behind her and leaned back, raising her face to the sunlight with her eyes closed, looking as if she were wishing away every care in the world.

Leanne and Black began an animated discussion with hands moving, fingers pointing and brows furrowed. Potter was watching Lily, but was obviously adding his wisdom to the discussion occasionally, judging by how Leanne would turn to him, pointing and motioning with her hands in emphases with whatever she was talking about. Deborah on the other hand, looked worried, biting on her fingernails and interjecting her thoughts into the conversation occasionally.

Lily sat up, and Severus was surprised to see worry etched on Lily's face as she made a comment in the discussion. Potter leaned over and touched her arm, his expression one of concern.

Severus had a fair idea of what they were discussing: wards – especially protective wards, or about the Dark Lord – or as he was being called now days, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named or You-Know-Who, since he was a common topic everywhere in the castle lately. Everyone was nervous, scared or apprehensive about going home. Nearly every Muggle-born or half-blood in the castle was getting continued lessons from Dumbledore himself on home security with every professor attending and offering assistance to those having difficulties learning how to set wards and protective spells on their homes.

Severus thought that these lessons were a waste of time, if anyone had bothered to ask him of his opinion on the matter. The Dark Lord is the strongest, most powerful wizard there is, maybe even stronger than Dumbledore himself, and his Death Eaters are growing in numbers, many of them alumni of Hogwarts. Even some of my housemates are just waiting to graduate and join the ranks. With the emphasis on protective spells in Defense, there isn't a protection spell in the Hogwarts library that I or one of my housemates don't know about. Severus was sure that those who had left Hogwarts would know about them as well. The problem is that if you learn how to cast them – you can also learn how to disable them. No, you have to alter them. It's like the Dark Arts. They are as varied and ever changing as one's own imagination, and some I know are really imaginative. Likewise, if you are to protect your homes and families, you have to come up with spells and wards that are creative and imaginative, or make new ones. Ones the witches or wizards trying to break them down won't know.

Severus pulled his Charms book from his bag. In the margins of nearly every page in the book, he'd written all the charms, wards and protective spells he'd found, and the ones he'd been working on, including the few spells he'd altered and intensified, underlining those which he knew would work. Lily may not be talking to him now, but he'd see to her safety regardless. I don't have to be in her home to apply them, all I have to do is get close enough. I can ward her home and garden and make sure that at least there, she is safe. She'll thank me, someday, she'll find out how much I'm doing to do for her and she'll thank me. Maybe if I ensure her safety, she'll realize just how much I love her, and she'll come back to me. He felt the now familiar wrenching in his gut that was there whenever he thought about winning Lily back.

He watched Lily argue with Black over something and smiled. He can't protect you, but I know how and I will. Beside, Black's brother, Regulus, is one of the Slytherins who joined up. I heard him talking to Rosier. Rosier and Avery are going to join, I think; at least they talk about the Dark Lord as if they might. Mulciber, too. Lily was right; they admire the Dark Lord and what he stands for. I don't completely agree with them; blood and power are not synonymous – ability, strength of power and intelligence will beat out blood any day. Knowledge and the ability to use that knowledge – that's what's important. That's real power. And you, Lily, have that in spades.

He watched her, the deep ache in his heart pulsing with his heartbeat as he wished she was sitting with him instead of his nemesis. The determination in her expression, the fierceness in her eyes... she's telling them the same thing, I'm sure of it.

He smiled as he bent his head over his book, contemplating three charms that if used together should fortify glass windows, making them both unbreakable and repel most spells aimed at them. If he could only figure out the right way to make them work together and remain in place...

~June 5, 1997~

Hermione was terribly confused and distraught. She'd trusted Severus, completely. He'd even saved her life with that Impediment Hex, assisted Luna by Transfiguring that Death Eater's foot into pinchers, and she heard Professor McGonagall say that he'd helped her out with a Shield Charm. Nevertheless, Harry was insistent that Severus had killed Dumbledore in cold blood, and Tonks said Severus had attacked her, although she did admit the misfired spell had hit her opponent.

It didn't fit.

She sat in the tower room, watching as the shades the predawn sky changed, furious that the sky gave the promise for a beautiful day. How could it be beautiful? Dumbledore is dead. He's actually dead. Bill is marred for life, and no one knows for certain if he'll be infected by lycanthropy or not. Neville and Professor Flitwick are injured and are lying in the hospital wing. Likewise, Ron had a broken arm and a few ribs. Several third years were sleeping off the terror of having been caught in the fight unawares. Even Luna was being kept overnight for a curse that hit her arm.

She wanted the sky to be cloudy and grey, like her mood. She missed Severus terribly, wishing she could somehow talk to him, to reason out what happened. She'd come up here to be close to him, their private place in the castle, but the room didn't offer her any comfort at all. Instead, she was plagued by the memories of the times they'd shared together in the room and his glorious hands on her body or the way he felt when he'd entered her. She couldn't stop thinking about him. It was maddening.

She had stopped by his office after the fight, but the door was locked and she couldn't get in, although she was hardly surprised.

Harry was withdrawn, and exceptionally moody, except when he was with Ginny. Watching Harry, all she could think about was her desire to be with Severus, hold onto him and never let him go. A deep empty hollow seemed to occupy itself in her chest, a dull ache that never truly went away.

Hermione was glad that Harry and Ginny were finally a couple, but things didn't bode well. Harry was already talking about a mission, something Dumbledore insisted that Harry had to do, and it was not finishing school. The Horcruxes. Harry is going to go after the Horcruxes. Hermione had tried searching in the library, even in the Restricted Section, but couldn't find anything on what a Horcrux was or how one was destroyed.

On a fluke, she'd cast the charm at the Headmaster's tower, and two books had flown out to her. Gobsmacked, embarrassed, and relieved, she had brought the books with her to read and was sickened by what she found out. The worst was that there were so few ways to destroy them. Feindfyre, which is completely uncontrollable unless you are a very powerful wizard. Even if I could do the controlling charm – I don't know if I'm strong enough to control Feindfyre. Feindfyre has a mind of its own and wants to burn everything, even its creator. It'll turn on the wizard who creates it if their concentration wavers even for a few seconds, so that's not a realistic option. Basilisk venom destroys a Horcrux, which is nearly impossible to find. Unless the venom of the Basilisk Harry had killed in the Chamber of Secrets is still viable after four years in a decaying corpse. We could use Godric Gryffindor's sword. Harry said that Dumbledore used the sword to break the ring, but I seriously doubt that Professor McGonagall will simply hand it over to me. She'd tried Summoning the sword, but it hadn't come to her. You have to destroy the soul inside the object, effectively killing it while getting around the protection spells. Sounds so much easier than it probably is. How are we going to accomplish this mission of Harry's? If only I could ask Severus...

Severus. Every thought she had returned to Severus, making the ache inside her deepen even more. He's gone over to Voldemort. He's a Death Eater again. Dumbledore trusted him as his advisor, confidant and master of Potions, and yet Severus killed him.

I need to know why he did this! Why he ran off with Draco? Why did he leave me? She had reasoned out every possible reason why he had locked her in his office with Professor Flitwick and Luna, and the only logical reason was to keep her from harm. That made sense. But he should have sent me an owl. He could have charmed it so that only I could read it, to let me know. But he hasn't. He won't, will he? Tears ran down her cheeks again, unchecked.

My professor and my lover is now a traitor and murderer. It was enough to make her want to scream. But he saved my life, Luna's, and he saved Professor McGonagall. Heck, he even tried numerous times to save Harry as well as Ron and me. Ron.

Ron had been uncommonly affectionate towards her, needing her support. Ron wants to be my boyfriend, he even said he wants a chance at a relationship with me, but I still love Severus. He is trying to be comforting, even though he doesn't know exactly why I'm melancholy... He thinks I'm sad because of Dumbledore, which I am, but more so because I miss Severus so much.

Giving up on finding any solitude in the tower room, she left to seek the reassurance of the books in the library, hoping to find any spells that would help Harry in the search for the Horcruxes or a likely candidate for the elusive R.A.B.

After hours of scanning the papers she found two names with the initials R.A.B.

One was a witch, Roselind Antigone Bungs, and the other was a wizard, Rupert 'Axebanger' Brookstanton – both possible people for the elusive R.A.B. Nevertheless, upon further investigation, Hermione discounted either of them as likely candidates for the mysterious R.A.B. From the note in Harry's locket, R.A.B. was a Death Eater. But neither Mrs. Bungs nor Mr. Brookstanton fit the description of what Hermione considered a Death Eater type.

Roselind Antigone Bungs had been a Primary school teacher, who ran an exclusive school for four- to ten-year-old wizarding children. The article for enrollment in the Roselind Bungs Primary School stated that there was an entrance exam to get into her school and that she supposedly only admitted the top fifty of the eligible wizarding children. Which meant that the families who applied to send their children to her school had to be able to afford her tutelage. Her curriculum included: maths, English grammar and spelling, garden herbology, basic Latin, music, painting, ceramics, and pet management. Apparently, puffskeins, streelers, toads, and mice were acceptable 'pets' at her school, although the older kids were allowed half-crups and half-kneazles.

Likewise, Rupert 'Axebanger' Brookstanton didn't seem the type to have been a Death Eater either. He was a fairly famous woodcutter who obviously traveled a great deal. He was well known for finding very rare and very powerful wood types for use in magical devices such as wands and trunks. He was a father of six sons, three of whom were shown in a picture with their father on a wood gathering expedition in the African plains. Another picture of him showed a heavily muscled man, holding a huge axe slung across his shoulders, whose face was marred by hundreds of scratches, possibly from bowtruckles. Yet, he was still a remarkably handsome wizard, and his eyes and smile seemed warm and friendly in the picture. Not only that, but his image kept shifting his weight every now and again, occasionally turning his head as if he'd felt a bit shy about having his picture taken.

Groaning in frustration, Hermione returned to the Defense Section, wishing she still had access to the Restricted Section.

~Meanwhile~

Severus knelt down before the Dark Lord, dragging a cowering Draco down with him to keel at his side. "Severus, what is this I hear?"

Severus used the few moments he had to rearranging his thoughts so that the events of the battle, as he remembered them, were sufficiently askew. "If you are referring to Dumbledore's death, yes, it has been accomplished, although not as you may have liked."

"I am indeed referring to Draco's task."

"He hesitated," Severus stated, finally ready to be mentally violated by the Dark Lord. "Dumbledore was using his skills of persuasion on the boy, trying to confuse him and making promises he couldn't keep. It was for naught, but time was short, so I acted. I didn't want Draco to fail in his first task, my Lord."

"I have already heard from the others," the Dark Lord said while pacing. "The Carrows and Rowle were rather impressed. However, Draco, you have disappointed me." Luckily, Draco did little else but grovel silently.

"If I may be so bold, you gave a man's task to a child," Severus spoke up before Draco did or said anything to make matters worse. "He was destined to fail. Dumbledore was an icon at Hogwarts. All the students looked up to him, even the Slytherins. I was hardly surprised that Draco hesitated. If so many of the Order hadn't been present, fighting in the corridors below, I'd have gladly waited Draco out."

"But why were you even there on the tower? This was not the plan I had for you," the Dark Lord said irritably. The invasion was swift following the question. The Dark Lord wasn't interested in his memories of the battle – he was searching for something else.

Severus barely had time to block his memories of Hermione from his mind as the Dark Lord searched for the answer he wanted. Knowing the probing could open the wrong memories, Severus showed him the vision of the vow. "What is this?" he hissed angrily as Narcissa's visit replayed in his mind.

"I did not allow her betray you, or your plans. But yes, I made an Unbreakable Vow with Narcissa so that your plan – whatever it was – would be fulfilled. All I thought I had to do was make sure Draco did it. He was difficult and resisted my assistance, but I never wavered. I was diligent, even though he didn't want my aide. I was available and supported his efforts in any way I could, and as much as I could from within."

"But, Severus, this is a new problem, and I don't want problems right now. I want you at Hogwarts," the Dark Lord emphasized venomously. "Especially now that the castle is weakened and within our grasp. I wanted you there! Not here."

"My Lord, all is not lost..."

"No, it isn't," the Dark Lord said. "It just means that we shall have to move my plans up and expedite the arrangements to take control. Nevertheless, Hogwarts is essential. I must have control of the castle. I must have YOU back in that castle, Severus."

~June 7, 1977~

Severus stood in the trees, using them as cover to avoid being seen. As usual, Potter, Black, Pettigrew and Lupin were sitting down by the lake with Lily, Charlene, Deborah, and Leanne. Severus knew that Charlene was Black's newest conquest, a fairly pretty, busty girl from Hufflepuff who in Severus' mind was a perfect complement to Black, half-blood, half-wit, and well endowed but not in the financial sense. She'd made her way through the finically well-endowed Slytherins and has opted to debase herself even further with Black. I wonder if he's aware she's a pureblood gold-digger? The wench even made a go at me when Avery told her I was descended from the Prince family.

Lupin, as usual, was reading, occasionally snickering at something one of his friends or the girls said, and Pettigrew was laughing and clapping at everything Potter or Black did or said as if he were their biggest fanatic. Pathetic. Well, one more year down and, thanks to that lot, I've enough counter-curses, counter-hexes and counter-jinxes under my hat for next year. That and all the defensive spells I have been working on. I'll be able to protect what's mine, he thought as his gaze focused on Lily, and what ought to be mine.

Severus had a hard time keeping his eyes off Lily. He wanted to walk away, leave and not have to torture himself wanting and watching her. She was lounging in the grass between both Potter and Lupin, holding a flower in her hand. Severus knew that she was making the petals move as if the flower was talking to her. It was one of her favorite magic tricks.

Lupin leaned over to her and showed her something from the book in his hands, and Lily leaned toward him to read whatever it was he wanted to show her. Everywhere I go I see Lily with Lupin! Lupin, that werewolf! She ditched me, threw my friendship over for Lupin's!

Whatever it was he'd shown her engrossed her enough to set down the flower and pull the book onto her lap to read the print as Lupin picked up another book. He was flipping through the pages, stopping occasionally to show her something, obviously comparing what he found to what she was reading. Potter picked up her flower and tucked it into her hair clip, sliding his fingers down the silky lock. Just as I used to do. He's not supposed to be the one doing that – I am. If Severus dared hexing Potter, he would have, even from where he stood. But now isn't the time.

Lily turned to look at Potter, smiling, and Potter caressed her cheek. Whatever he'd told her made her smile even more, her shoulders rising and falling as if she'd made a big sigh of relief. Potter rolled toward her to whisper in her ear, and Lily lowered her head as if she were blushing. He's flirting with her – my Lily! Potter is making moves on my girl. How dare he!

He wanted to scream. He wanted to curse someone. He wanted to kill Potter and drag Lily back up to the tower so they could talk. Actually that wasn't true, he wanted to hold her in his arms. He wanted to make love to her and believe that things hadn't fallen apart. He wanted to believe that Lily wasn't with Gryffindor golden boys.

Severus turned and walked deeper into the trees, unable to take much more of watching Lily sitting with his mortal enemies. The further in the trees he walked the darker his mood became, and the anger festered in his mind. Potter is flirting with Lily! Potter and my Lily! It looks like she's thrown me over for Potter! And apparently, she still trusts that werewolf!

There was a snarl and a growl from somewhere in the trees, but Severus didn't care. The way he felt presently, nothing had better try and cross his path. He'd kill it – Avada Kedavra it in its tracks. He'd just think about Potter and zap – a snarly, growling creature would be a dead creature.

~June 7, 1997~

Severus stood in the trees, watching the people at Dumbledore's funeral. The stooped shoulders of the old man's body hurt his back, and the only way to ease that pain was to lean against a tree, but the old man's legs were weak. Severus had tried sitting on the roots, but they had hurt his bum. Still, he was not going to miss the funeral and make his farewells to the one wizard he truly looked up to all these years. Regardless of all the times Dumbledore had used him or asked him for things he hadn't wanted to do. He still respected the man, as much as he hated him. So this disguise was a necessary inconvenience he would simply endure.

It had been for Lily that he'd switched sides, and had sworn his oath. And now – now he had another reason. She would never forgive him of course, but he'd see her live, make sure she survived. And she couldn't live under the Dark Lord. She'd be a target. She represented everything the Dark Lord preached against, her existence, intelligence, power, and her skill proved him wrong – just like Lily had.

The song of the merpeople caught his attention, the mournful melody wafted on the breeze. A tear ran down the old wrinkled face, unchecked. All around him in the edge of the trees, the centaurs started arriving, standing in the shade as the head wizard of the school governors spoke. Severus wasn't listening. His mind was full of memories, remembrances of times spent with Dumbledore: each time he scoffed at the proffered lemon drop, each time he returned from the Dark Lord both to give his report and to receive the next order. The times when Dumbledore spoke to him about his plans and what needed to be done. Severus knew his tasks weren't finished, completed, he still had promises to fulfill. His part was only beginning anew. 'Protect my students, Severus. Make sure Harry wins,' Dumbledore had pleaded. 'I know Tom will want to get back into Hogwarts, Severus. He will want to take over the school. With me gone, he will be able to, I fear. You must do what you can to take my place. There are things here in my office,' he'd said, looking at the Sorting Hat and the Sword of Gryffindor, 'that Tom must not get his hands on. I've placed many memories in the cupboard. Use them to validate your actions, my son, should you survive. But those too would destroy you in the wrong hands. I've placed a heavy burden on you all these years, but you've always proven most capable and my faith in you has always been valid. I'm afraid I still need you; Harry still needs you, but I know you will not let us down....'

Only when the bright white flames flared to life, their magic concealing the erection of the tomb, did his focus return to the funeral. As if on cue, as soon as the flames died down, the centaurs shot their arrows in tribute, their aim true, creating a half circle around the marble tomb. Severus took another mouthful of the potion in his pocket. He didn't want to leave without seeing Hermione. As the mourners rose and began to move about, he lost sight of her. She had been sitting with Potter and Weasley, crying, but she wasn't in her seat now. She'd moved off into the crowd.

Severus saw Potter talking to Miss Weasley. The emotions warring on their faces were so evident that Severus didn't even need to hear the conversation to know what the boy was doing – he was breaking it off with her. Severus watched as Potter turned and walked away, leaving Miss Weasley crying in his wake. Severus didn't care; he knew it was the right thing to do. The Dark Lord will use anyone he thought Potter was close to against him. Severus watched the girl, locking the memory of the break up and Miss Weasley's devastated expression in his mind. At least he could tell the Dark Lord that Potter dashed the girl's hopes, that she wasn't that important to him. That will protect the girl.

Severus moved carefully among the crowd, leaning heavily on his cane. He followed Potter, knowing he'd lead him to Hermione. Severus saw her before Potter did, in the arms of Mr. Weasley. She was crying on his shoulder while Mr. Weasley stroked her hair. A rage grew in him he hadn't expected, a familiar feeling upon seeing her in Weasley's arms, even though he knew with absolute certainty it was only because he was offering her comfort. I should be doing that. That should be me – not that insolent snot! He growled, catching several looks, but Severus didn't care. She is my witch.

His rational mind warred with his reason. Even if things were different – even if I hadn't killed Dumbledore and Draco had... No, I wouldn't – couldn't have been the one to comfort her. Not in public. But I could have given her a sign, a signal that I was here for her. I could have at least pretended that... I could have brought her to my office – except all the Slytherins would be seeking me out, asking questions, confused, crying, and invading my privacy. No, I wouldn't have any time for her, unless we went to our tower... and I can't risk meeting her there now. Damn, Dumbledore, why didn't you wait and destroy the ring at the school? Together we could have done it! What was so special about that bloody ring? Why didn't you take me instead of Potter that night? What was that poison you drank? Why didn't you send for me immediately when you realized what you'd consumed?

Severus watched as Minister Scrimgeour approached Potter and noted the boy's stiff posture as Potter glared at him. Whatever the Minister wanted, Potter wasn't going along; the emotions on their faces were much too easy to read. Potter turned and walked over to Hermione and Weasley, and Hermione turned to console her friend. Severus was close enough now. Deftly casting a subtle but difficult charm allowed him to hear the conversation. What he heard didn't surprise him. Potter was going after the Horcruxes, and Weasley and Hermione were going with him. Severus swore silently. How am I supposed to protect you, keep you from harm, and help you defeat the Dark Lord, if you're going to go wandering around, Merlin knows where, in search of only the Dark Lord knows what? Severus wanted a stiff drink and a long talk with a portrait. One he couldn't even get to – yet.

~ T B C ~>

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Author's Notes: