4

"What the bloody hell is going on?" Draco said angrily.

Meruitensa stepped forward, an evil grin plastered on his face. "I have informed the Pharaoh that you are no more Osiris than I am Anubis!"

"Well then, you better just bust out the bandages and canopic jars because I AM OSIRIS!" Draco shouted to a stunned room. "And I'll prove it!" He let go of Hermione's hand and pulled out his wand.

"Draco..."

"Shh," he whispered to her. "Just follow my lead."

Hermione, who had never trusted Malfoy one tiny bit, decided there was a first time for everything and pulled out her wand as well.

Pharaoh Djoser stood his ground, not frightened a bit, but the others in the room backed up in fear, not knowing what the god and goddess were capable of doing. Djoser glanced around, annoyed by the way his servants were quaking in fear like cowards. He then turned to Draco. "Do as you say! Prove to me that you are Osiris!"

Draco smirked. "As you wish." He turned to Hermione. "Shall we turn them all into hippos, or perhaps something less flashy?"

Hermione was totally in awe of Draco's cool composure. It's like he was having the time of his life or something. "Maybe we should just do some simple spells and see what happens?"

"That's lame, Granger. I expected more from you."

"Sorry to disappoint you."

"Don't let it happen again." He raised his wand, slashed it through the air and sent a huge pillar of fire soaring through the air. It circled the room, causing the astonished guards to fall to the ground and cover their heads. He then made a swift movement with his wand and sent the flame crashing into the floor where it exploded, sending sparks and embers hurling into the smoke-filled room. The building shook, and a long crack appeared in the floor. Meruitensa and the Pharaoh ran for cover, but Saneha just stood there with a knowing smile on his face.

Hermione stood watching in amazement. "I never knew you could do something like that!" she said. "That was... was..."

"Fucking awesome, right?" He lowered his wand and addressed the panic-stricken people. "And now my lovely wife will demonstrate her powers. You may want to stay close to the ground for safety's sake." He turned and bowed to Hermione.

Hermione bowed back and then raised her hands into the air. She slowly made a circle with her wand, and the temperature in the room dropped several degrees. A cold wind swept through the chamber, making the Egyptians shudder.

Everyone was looking apprehensively toward the gathering clouds in the room. Suddenly, there was a blinding flash of lightning, followed by a sonic crack of thunder. The clouds darkened and rain poured out, drenching the terrified onlookers.

Hermione glanced at Draco, who had his face turned up into the rain, smiling. "Are you pleased?" she shouted through the wind and thunder.

Draco spat water out of his mouth. "Very!" he said, laughing, and turned his face back toward the cloud-covered ceiling.

Hermione could hear the people shouting for her to stop. "Please, goddess!" the Pharaoh yelled. "I have seen enough!"

Hermione waved her wand, and the storm dissipated. She made a beautiful rainbow appear and added the sound of birds singing. "A little too much?" she asked Draco, who was shaking his head, eyebrow raised in an annoyed way.

"Showoff!" he said, crossing his arms and pouting. "Always have to out do me, don't you?"

"It's not that difficult to do, Draco."

"Don't call me Draco." He smirked. "I might get the impression that you fancy me or something." He winked at her and wiggled his eyebrows. "Wanna kiss me right now, don't you?"

"As if I would ever fancy you! You make me sick!" Hermione said. "I'd rather kiss a crocodile!"

The Pharaoh shot a glance at Meruitensa, who nodded as if saying 'I told you so.' The Pharaoh did indeed find it strange that the god and goddess would talk and argue with one another like they were. He explained it away, however, by deciding that even a goddess would lose patience with a god who acted the way Osiris was acting.

Meanwhile, Draco's eyes flashed in anger. "That can be arranged!" He waved his wand, and a Nile crocodile appeared at her feet, snapping its jaws. She jumped back, clutching her chest.

"Oh, yeah?" Hermione shot back. Suddenly a Hippogriff was flying at Draco. He raised his arms over his head and ran around the chamber, screaming as the animal flapped its wings and tried to tear into him with its sharp beak.

Everyone in the room ran away in fright except for the Pharaoh, Saneha, Meruitensa and one other man. "Please! We believe you! Stop this at once!" the Pharaoh pleaded.

"It's amazing how quickly the two of them jump from being friendly to almost killing each other," Saneha said to the unknown man. "I have only been around them for a few hours, and I have already witnessed a few scenes of anger and many instances of what can only be love."

The man watched Draco as he waved his wand, turning the huge animal into some kind of child's toy. He then picked it up and threw it at Hermione, hitting her in the head. She screamed obscenities at him and shot a ray of blue light from her wand, which missed him and hit the wall behind him, blowing up a clay pot. "I struggle to see what you see. Love? All I see," he said, turning to Saneha, "is hatred... and possibly unresolved sexual tension."

Saneha laughed. "You would, Imhotep! It's always about the sex with you, isn't it?"

"Always!" Imhotep said with a small smile. He was looking hungrily at Hermione. "Sex with a Goddess. Now that's something not everyone can say they've done..."

Saneha blanched. "Imhotep! You wouldn't!"

He turned toward the Steward. "Now that I have finished the tomb for our Pharaoh, I think I deserve a little fun, don't you, Saneha?"

Imhotep stepped in between the two fighting deities. "If you would kindly stop trying to kill each other, I will take you to your rooms."

Draco stopped in the middle of calling Hermione a bitch and frowned at the Egyptian with contempt. "And who the hell are you to tell me to stop anything?"

The Egyptian bowed low to the ground. "I am The Chancellor of the King of Lower Kemet, the first after the King of Upper Kemet, administrator of the great palace, hereditary lord, the High priest of Re, the foremost builder, sculptor and maker of the Pharaoh's tomb... I am Imhotep."

Hermione rolled her eyes and whispered to Draco, "His ego is bigger than YOURS."

Imhotep looked up at Draco. "I am your servant."

"Can I talk to you alone?" Draco grabbed Hermione by the crook of her arm and dragged her over to the corner. "What do you know about this Imhotep person?"

Hermione glanced over at the man, who was now standing next to Djoser, waiting patiently. "He was the first human to be deified as a god." Hermione lowered her voice even more. "He became the god of medicine, worshipped and revered by all of Egypt." She paused. "Oh, and he was the one who built the so-called Step-Pyramid."

Draco sized the man up. "I don't like him."

"You don't even know him."

"I can spot an evil bastard like that!" he said, snapping his fingers loudly.

"It takes one to know one, is that what you're saying?"

"Why must you always be so bloody mean to me, Granger?"

"Ah! Did I hurt your feelings?" she said, making a sad face.

"I must insist that we take you to your rooms. We have a ceremony to prepare for," Meruitensa said, walking toward them.

Draco turned around and pointed his wand directly in the priest's face. "You were serious about this 'ceremony'?"

"Only parts of it."

"Which parts?" Draco asked, narrowing his eyes.

"Just the part where you and Isis make love." There really was no such ceremony, but he was sure he could trick the Pharaoh and Saneha into thinking one existed.

Draco smiled. "Well, in that case, let's get the show on the road!" He turned to Hermione and smirked in triumph. "After all, it's been so long since I've had the pleasure of making love to my 'wife'!"

"You wouldn't dare, Malfoy!"

"You don't really know me at all, do you, Granger?" He let himself be led out of the chamber by the Pharaoh and Meruitensa, laughing all the way.

Hermione was left alone with Imhotep and Saneha.

"Why do you let him speak to you the way he does?" Imhotep asked. "You are Isis, mother of Horus, a very powerful goddess. You should not be treated with such disrespect, especially by your husband!"

Hermione sighed. "It's very complicated."

"I would think that someone with your beauty, strength and intelligence would have the courage to put him in his place."

Hermione could tell that Draco was right. This man was not a good person. He was up to something. "Ah! But you are forgetting that he is also very strong and intelligent, " she said, walking toward the door. "And we must not forget that he is also extremely powerful!"

"Yes, that is a problem..." Imhotep said, stroking his chin.

***

Draco's room was splendidly decorated with the best furnishing ancient Egypt had to offer. It seemed that everywhere he turned there was gold, which he was already accustomed to, being from a wealthy family.

"Are you pleased with your chamber, my Lord?" Djoser asked.

"Yes, it pleases me very much!" Draco jumped when the heavy door to the room opened and several young female slaves entered. He looked at Meruitensa questioningly.

"They are here to bathe you, my Lord."

"Bathe me? As in lather me up and scrub my unreachables?"

The priest raised his eyebrow at the Pharaoh. Djoser just shrugged his shoulders. "Yes. You must be cleansed before the ritual begins."

"When is this 'ritual' to take place?" Draco asked them while winking at one of the slaves.

"When the moon rises in the sky, you will take your wife and make love to her, symbolizing the conception of our beloved Horus."

"And then what?"

"There will be a celebration in your honour! You will take the throne as ruler, promising never to leave us again!"

"That's asking quite a lot, don't you think?"

"You do not want to rule?" Djoser asked. "But it was foretold in the sacred scrolls that you would return and rule for all eternity!"

Draco looked around uncertainly. "Um... yeah. Where are these scrolls?" He thought maybe he and Granger would be able to find something in them, something that would help them get out of Kemet and back to Hogwarts.

Meruitensa narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "Why?"

"I would like to read them for myself! Do not question me again, priest, or I will make your scrotum swell until it bursts!" he said angrily. "Now, when I get back from my bath with these attractive ladies, I want those scrolls waiting for me! Is that clear, priest?"

Meruitensa bowed as anger and humiliation burned in his heart. "Yes, my Lord."

***

Hermione paced the floor in her room, waiting for Draco. Saneha had come with a message from Draco, saying that he would come to her room as soon as he could manage to slip past the guards.

The door opened, and he came creeping in, trying to be as quiet as possible. He was carrying scrolls and looking smug.

"What the hell took you so long?" she asked angrily.

"Well, if you must know, I was being bathed by four nubile, young Egyptian ladies." The corner of his mouth twitched. "That was the most erotic thing that's ever happened to me; I just might stay here and rule forever like they want me to!"

"What do you mean, 'rule forever'?"

Draco laid the scrolls down on Hermione's bed. "Well, according to these ancient prophecies, Osiris is supposed to come back and rule for all eternity."

"Let me see those!" she picked one up and unrolled it. "These are in hieroglyphics! How did you read them?"

Draco rolled his eyes in exasperation. "If you can cast a spell to speak the language, then obviously you can cast another so that you can read it! I just so happen to know of such a spell." He grinned at her. "Would you like to to know what it is?"

"Of course I would. Now what is it?"

"Maybe I don't want to tell you. Maybe I want to be the smart one for once."

"We don't have time for your childish jealousies. You'll never be smarter than me, so just accept it and tell me the damn spell!"

Draco wanted more than anything to show her that he was just as smart, or smarter, than she was. He vowed there would come a time when he would prove it to her, but now was clearly not that time. She was right about time being short, after all. "Fine!" He told her and watched as she cast the spell as if she had done it a million times before.

"Let's see. When Horus has defeated Set and the world is once again at peace, the Lord of Duat will once again set foot in his beloved land to rule for all eternity." She scanned the scroll and found something of interest at the very bottom. "In the reign of the Great Organizer, on the longest day of the year, look to the east. He will appear in a wooden coffin adorned with gold, and a wondrous noise will accompany his arrival."

Hermione looked up at Draco, who was pacing the floor. "This could describe the clock, you know. It's wooden, and the pendulum is gold..."

"And that clock makes a godawful noise when it chimes!" He stopped and lifted up another scroll. This one was more worn than the others, as if it had been read numerous times before. "More about Osiris..." He glanced over it until he came across an interesting statement. "Granger, listen to this. The coffin will appear once more, during the darkest part of the night. He will try to enter it, descending once more into Duat."

Hermione just about jumped for joy. "This must mean that, if these scrolls are correct, the clock is going to appear again, maybe around midnight?"

"We need to get to that clock, Granger!"

"That's going to be difficult. We're guarded by soldiers everywhere we go."

"I managed to slip past the guards. I could do it again." He moved the scrolls and plopped himself down on her bed. "The thing that I'm worried about is this ritualistic ceremony in a few hours."

Hermione bit her lip in frustration and asked apprehensively, "Are you willing to go through with it?"

Draco sat up quickly, almost falling off the bed. "You can't mean that you would actually... that you would..."

"Have sex with someone I despise in front of everyone so that we can keep up the façade of being Osiris and Isis, and thereby earn their trust so that we may escape and get back home? Yes."

Draco smiled. "You really despise me that much?" He reached his hand out to stroke her linen dress, only to have it slapped away. "Ow!"

"You'll have a chance to touch me all you want in about four hours," she said, blushing.

Her heart was about to explode in fear just thinking about what she had to do. It wasn't so much that it would be Draco who would take her virginity, which was actually kind of all right with her; it was doing it in front of all those strangers that terrified her.

"I better get back to my room," he said, picking up the scrolls and moving toward the door. "I'll see you in a few hours. Try not to think about the hot sex we're going to have; I don't want the guards bursting in and seeing you fingering yourself!" He smirked and shut the door.

The guards almost attacked him before he could say, "Obliviate!" He then made his way to his room, thinking about what he had to do to Hermione during the ritual. It was both exciting and revolting at the same time. He wouldn't mind having sex with her... when she actually wanted it. To him, this was going to be too close to rape to enjoy it. Draco might be a bastard, but he would never stoop so low as to force a girl to have sex with him.

***

Hermione tried not to think about the nightly festivities, but it was hopeless. She wondered if it would hurt and if she might like it, or perhaps it would be so disgusting that she would throw up. As the hours dwindled down, she began to panic more and more, until she was sweating and on the verge of tears.

Saneha came in and, seeing her in anguish, kindly embraced her. He tried to comfort her by telling her it would only last a few minutes and then it would be over. It was something that must be done, or the officials, the Pharaoh and the priests, would not believe they were the gods, and they would be put to death.

"What a way to make me feel better, Saneha!" Hermione wailed.

Saneha sighed and then stood. He bowed and left. He leaned against the wall, thinking. He knew of the scrolls, of course. He knew that there was a way for the gods to escape. He just wished there was some way he could help them.

***

Imhotep and Meruitensa stood in Draco's room, ready to escort him to the temple. They were both eyeing him suspiciously because he was sweating profusely and talking to himself.

"You can do it, Draco. She won't mind, it was her idea to go through with it..."

"If you please, we must proceed to the..."

"TEMPLE! I BLOODY FUCKING KNOW!" he screamed. Sitting down in a chair, he leaned forward and put his face in his hands. "I don't know if I can do this..."

"If it would please my Lord, I would be willing to act in your stead and ravish the beautiful goddess in your place," Imhotep said.

Meruitensa stifled a grin as Draco charged at Imhotep, his wand out, and screamed threats at him. "How dare you! If you ever lay a finger on her, I'll chop off your hands and shove them up your ass! I'll cut out your filthy tongue and make you eat it! I'll..."

"I get the point, my Lord. She is untouchable."

Draco blinked, surprised at the audacious way this man was speaking to him. "The next time you interrupt me, or speak to me in that sarcastic tone again, I will kill you." He stepped back and lowered his wand. "I'm ready. Let's go."

Hermione was led into the temple where Draco was already standing, leaning on the throne where Djoser sat. She saw that he was shaking and looked quite sick.

Hermione was placed in the middle of the room where there was a circle drawn on the ground and then left alone. She looked at Draco, who wouldn't meet her eye.

Imhotep stepped forward and raised his arms. "We have been privileged to witness the second coming of our god, Osiris! He is all-powerful and all-knowing! He is the teacher of the law! The bringer of order and justice!" Imhotep lowered his arms and turned toward Draco. "His love for his sister and wife knows no bounds! Together they created 'He Who is Above'! Let us bear witness to this love, that we may share in it!"

Draco stepped into the circle and, with a shaky hand, slipped Hermione's dress from her statue-like form. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

Hermione said nothing, but Draco saw the tears in her eyes. He knew she was frightened and embarrassed. She didn't move as he lightly caressed her bare shoulder, or when he kissed her neck tenderly. She did, however, close her eyes as he trailed his fingertips over her stomach and touched her in between her legs. She stiffened and held back a whimper as he gently slid his long finger inside of her.

Draco pulled her head back with his other hand and was just about to kiss her soft lips when he noticed a tear break away from her tightly shut eyes and slip down her flushed cheek. It broke his heart, and he knew he could never go through with this. "Open your eyes." He pulled her dress back over her head and then stepped away. She smiled at him thankfully.

The Pharaoh stood up. "What is the meaning of this?"

Draco took Hermione's hand in his and announced, "I'm afraid that we have been lying to you."

"We are not Osiris and Isis."

"I knew it!" Meruitensa said angrily.

"If you are not the god and goddess, then who are you? How is it that you can do magic?" Imhotep asked.

"It doesn't matter who we are or how we can do magic. All that matters is that we are getting the fuck out of here!" Draco said, and then he hit the ceiling with a powerful spell that made the temple shake.

"Arrest them!" the Pharaoh yelled. Soldiers ran toward them, spears aimed.

"Ah... not happening!" Draco said and hit them with a spell that sent them flying across the room, where they hit the wall with a sickening thud. Debris was falling from the ceiling, causing a thick dust to hover in the air. People were screaming and running around, trying to get out.

"Let's get the hell out of here!" Draco said, pulling Hermione by her arm.

"I think the entrance is over here!" Hermione said, trying to pull him the other way.

"No, it's not! I'm sure it's this way!" He said, yanking her in the other direction.

"I'm telling you. I came in that way!" Hermione pried his hand from her arm.

"No, you didn't! Now just shut the fuck up and follow me! We need to get out of here!" Draco turned around and was met by ten sharp spears being thrust into this face.

"I'm afraid that you are going nowhere but to your deaths!" Meruitensa said, stepping over the rubble. He laughed maniacally and punched Draco right in the face, knocking him out.

***

"Where the fucking hell are we, Granger?" Draco asked, trying to sit up. His head was throbbing, and there was a ringing noise in his ears.

"We're in a secret chamber underneath the Step-Pyramid. We've been buried alive."

Draco's eyes tried to focus in the gloomy darkness. "They left us here to starve to death?"

"Starvation is the least of our worries..." She pointed to a message on the wall that was glowing green.

Draco almost fell back against the wall and smacked his head. "But that's written in English!"

"How observant of you!" she said sarcastically.

"But how did it get here?" He scooted forward and ran his fingers over the letters.

"Your guess is as good as mine."

Draco read the message out loud, "If a man Doesn't know where he is going, there is no telling where he'll be when he gets there."

"Any idea what this means?"

Hermione pulled her knees up in front of her, wrapping her arms around her legs. "I don't know, Malfoy. All I know is that we only have a few hours to find a way out of here."

Draco looked away from her and back to the eerily glowing message. "Did you notice that the 'd' in 'doesn't' is bigger than all the other letters?"

"Yes," Hermione said wearily. "I noticed. I don't think it's important. Probably just a mistake the crazy writer of the message made."

Draco wasn't so sure it was a mistake.