Chapter Two

Thank you to everyone who reviewed! You have no idea how much it warmed my heart to get all those positive replies to my first story on this site. It was especially exciting for me to see that some people added me as a favorite story or author, so thank you and I hope you continue to enjoy the story! I love all of you!!!!!

Thank you to my beta, Dawn.

Chapter Two

Hermione jerked upwards, falling out of the couch. Oh God, oh God, oh God. She ran through her bedroom and into the small bathroom, barely making it there in time to retch helplessly into the toilet bowl. She felt unclean, like the worst kind of whore and bad friend. Oh, Ginny, she thought in despair. Deciding she wasn't up to dealing with this situation she fell into the shower, dressed, and left for work. Never mind it was hardly six in the morning when she dashed out the door. She trusted Harry to leave her apartment in decent condition.

Since the office wasn't open until eight in the morning, Hermione went to a nearby café to wile away the next hour and a half. She gazed despondently into her tea, picking at her blueberry muffin until it was little more than a pile of crumbs. How drunk had she been to do something like that with Harry? How drunk had Harry been to forget Ginny?

The official story from both Harry and Ginny was that they were "on a break" a.k.a. waiting until Voldemort was gone before they could be together. To ensure Ginny's safety Harry had convinced her to hide out in Romania with Charlie until the danger was gone. While neither claimed to be in a serious commitment, it was obvious that they were keeping faithful to one another. Until Hermione had ruined everything, that is.

Pushing her uneaten breakfast away, Hermione set her crossed arms on the table and lowered her head onto them. She had absolutely no clue how she was going to handle this.

Eventually it was time for Hermione to get to work. She strolled slowly from the café to the Ministry offices and made her way to the Auror's division.

"Happy Halloween and a Merry Samhain to you," declared the cheerful secretary as she walked to her office.

"Sure, why not," Hermione mumbled bleakly.

A little later Hermione was deep into her paperwork when she heard a knock at her open door. Glancing up, she saw the one person she had no desire to visit with today. "Harry." She nodded, looking back at her paperwork and continuing to scribble busily.

"Morning," Harry began slowly, watching her carefully. "Mind if I come in?"

Hermione dropped her quill, looked up and gave a large false smile. "Harry, you know you're always welcome in my office. Is something wrong?"

Harry was now looking at her like she had gone mad. "Er, don't you remember what happened last night?"

Hermione maintained her large, overly-bright smile. "Of course I remember last night, Harry. I woke up before you did today. I just don't see any reason for us to discuss it."

"Er, why not?"

"Harry," Hermione began slowly. "When I was a little girl I saw that my uncle, my mother's brother, drank a great deal. When I asked my mother why, or if something was wrong to make him drink so often, she told me that we weren't supposed to talk about it. I asked why. She told me that it isn't nice to talk about unpleasant things and that we should try to talk about something else instead. So, if there's something unpleasant happening, I just don't see why we should be discussing it. It won't solve anything and it's just upsetting."

Harry was now regarding his best friend of ten years like she had just grown another head. "Hermione, I'm pretty sure that's not a healthy attitude. In fact, I read somewhere that supporting an addiction like your uncle's by not acknowledging it can be downright harmful to everyone involved. And you never seemed to mind speaking your mind in the past."

"Harry, I speak my mind when it will solve something. Rehashing the foolishness of last night won't solve anything. What it will do is make us both uncomfortable." Harry knew that Hermione was being ridiculous, but at the same time the idea of avoiding their problems by ignoring them was attractive.

"Fine, we'll never speak of it again. But, Hermione, what about G..."

"Harry Potter, don't you even think about telling Ginny about this," Hermione snapped, dropping her freakishly false smile. "I will not allow you to destroy things with that girl just because of one idiotic mistake. Last night will be between the two of us, and Ginny never needs to find out." Harry looked uncomfortable. "Harry, I know how honorable you are, but last night was not important enough to jeopardize your and Ginny's future happiness. You have to let it go."

Harry nodded brusquely, his square jaw clenched in unhappiness. "As long as this doesn't ruin our friendship," he added.

This time Hermione's smile, although smaller and sadder, was genuine. "Of course not Harry."

After Samhain, or Halloween, Hermione threw herself into her work, distancing herself from Harry and Ron even though she had said she wouldn't. She tried to pretend that nothing had ever happened between Harry and her, but telling herself not to think about something only made her think about it even more. As the brisk fall of October progressed into the chill of November and then the outright cold of December, Hermione had never felt lonelier. Watching the snow fall outside her window every night made her remember all the winters at Hogwarts with her friends.

Of course Hermione still saw her friends. She worked with Harry and Ron, although Ron was rarely in the office because he was a good field agent and terrible behind a desk. After several examples of Ron's horrendous filing, Moody had banished him from the office. She still spent time with them, almost as much as she always had. But the huge secret between Harry and Hermione put something between them and Ron as well as between one another. Being estranged from her friends made Hermione lonelier than actually being along would have. And of course it didn't help that Ginny would be visiting for Christmas and Ron and Lavender's wedding. Hermione didn't know how she would face her closest female friend after such a great betrayal.

One night at the Leaky Cauldron with Harry and Ron found Hermione feeling particularly lonely. The conversation had been somewhat stilted and awkward because of all the unspoken thoughts between the three friends. After a while Ron caught on to the way Hermione was refusing to look at Harry whenever she spoke, looking instead at her apple-cider. She had decided drinking only led to foolish choices.

"Alright, what's going on between the two of you?" Ron regarded them suspiciously over his drink. "Harry, you've been quiet all night, and Hermione, you haven't looked at Harry since we got here. Did you two have a fight or something?"

Hermione flashed her fake-cheerful smile. "No, Ron, of course not. Nothing's wrong, don't worry." Harry nodded his agreement. Ron, however, did not look convinced.

"Well, whatever's going on between you two, I hope you get over it by the wedding. If everything isn't perfect, Lavender'll pitch a fit, and I'd rather there not be any awkward moments." The wedding was to be on January first. "Promise me nothing'll go wrong?" Ron looked at them pleadingly.

"No worries, mate," Harry tried to be reassuring. "Nothing's wrong. It'll all be fine." It was Hermione's turn to nod.

"Just think about your wedding, Ron," she added cheerfully. "After all, it's supposed to be the happiest day of your life, right?"

After that night, Hermione and Harry tried to act more natural around one another, but it was still difficult to avoid guilty thoughts.

Hermione, in the hopes of stopping her own thoughts at least, began taking long walks through the snow, chilling herself so thoroughly that she could almost numb out her own guilty conscience. Because Hermione walked every day it came as no surprise when she came down with the flu. When the flu persisted for more than a week, Hermione decided to visit a doctor.

"Um, what?" Hermione could feel her jaw hanging open. She sat in the office of a St. Mungo's medi-wizard.

The wizard regarded her coolly, though not unkindly, across his desk. "I tested you three times, just to make sure. That's general hospital policy to avoid unfortunate mistakes. There's no doubt, Ms. Granger, you are pregnant."

"But ... how ..." Hermione trailed off, desolately staring down at the wooden desk before her. Her hands absently moved to cradle her flat stomach. "I guess I haven't been getting my period, but I was just so busy .... This is terrible! "

The wizard looked confused and somewhat distressed. "I'm very sorry, Ms. Granger. Is there anything I can get you? A glass of water or some tea? You look pale."

Hermione felt pale. She also felt slightly nauseous, though that hadn't been an unfamiliar feeling of late. "So, there's no chance this is a mistake." It wasn't a question.

"No, Ms. Granger, absolutely no chance." The medi-wizard still looked troubled. "But, come now, do try to cheer up. Babies are a blessing! Nothing can bring happiness to a family like a baby!"

"Yes, of course," Hermione mumbled. She stood abruptly. "If you'll excuse me, I really must be going now. Thank you for all your help."

"Yes, yes. Well, congratulations, and I will owl you when you need another check-up." At Hermione's confused expression he explained. "It's important to monitor the baby's progress, make sure everything's going smoothly. Oh, and one more thing!" Grabbing a bit of parchment and a quill, the wizard scribbled something quickly. "Please give this to the witch at the desk. It's for a potion you should be taking everyday. Just a spoonful when you wake up in the morning, some extra vitamins and such. Good day!"

Hermione left in a daze, numbly walking down the corridor towards the outside. Stopping only briefly to receive her potion from the young witch at the desk, Hermione continued on her way, unaware that she had even left the building until a sudden gust of wind made her shiver.

"Oh, God," she murmured, staring at the clear winter sky above. "What the hell am I supposed to do?"

TBC......

A/N: Short chapters, I know, but otherwise too much would be happening per chapter. Hopefully the chapters will get longer later on.

Preview:

Mrs. Weasley secretively approached Hermione. "Anything you'd like to tell me, Dear?"