New Chapter for Moons of Deceit
Moons of Deceit
Grace has Victory29 Reviews | 7.86/10 (29 Ratings, 0 Likes, 7 Favorites )
Remus Lupin tolerates mischievous friends and lycanthropy while the prophetic Ariadne MacDougal negotiates a misguided family, and everyone must deal with the Death Eaters. A rather dark coming-of-age story of the death of innocence and the renewal of hope during Voldemort's first war.
Part I of The Moon-Cursers. Now updated to be DH-compatible.
Chapters (21)
About Grace has Victory
Author
Grace has Victory
Member Since 2006 | 10 Stories | Favorited by 23 | 3 Reviews Written | 356 Review Responses
My family became hooked on Harry Potter in 2001, when my son was going through a stage of reluctance to read fiction. Now it is a family hobby. I am a psychology teacher from Birmingham, England. My husband, who is Australian, is a computer programmer and network engineer. We have three teenaged children and two cats. We are all Evangelical Christians.
Reviews for Moons of Deceit
It's scary. I think that the MacDougals would be forgiving of Remus' werewolf nature, and I don't think they'd fire him, but really, there's always that danger. They might be upset that he had hidden it from them though. But I think Ariadne would give her parents both what-for if they dared to be upset about that.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, It would never cross the MacDougals' minds that anyone associated with them could be a werewolf. After all, werewolves are nasty, while young Mr Lupin is hardworking and polite. How Ariadne deals with her parents (and brother) will be revealed in due course. Thanks for reviewing, GhV
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, It would never cross the MacDougals' minds that anyone associated with them could be a werewolf. After all, werewolves are nasty, while young Mr Lupin is hardworking and polite. How Ariadne deals with her parents (and brother) will be revealed in due course. Thanks for reviewing, GhV
When he brought up Emmeline Vance, I thought he was going to bring up lycanthropy, not chaperoning his daughter on an outing ... which, I hope doesn't occur during a full moon, come to think of it. *whew*
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS,Emmeline would not betray a friend like that. But that outing could turn out to be important.Unfortunately, it WILL be during the full moon.Regards,GhV
Response from notsosaintly (Reviewer)
Oh, it would have to be, wouldn't it? Well, you have been setting us up for it.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS,Emmeline would not betray a friend like that. But that outing could turn out to be important.Unfortunately, it WILL be during the full moon.Regards,GhV
Response from notsosaintly (Reviewer)
Oh, it would have to be, wouldn't it? Well, you have been setting us up for it.
This chapter broke my heart. Veleta is not coming back. I saw Veleta and Ariadne as a combination. They relied on each other, and their abilities played off each other. Now Ariadne is like a lost soul, wandering to find someone else to love ... and that brings me to the next chapter, which I reviewed before this because I was looking for this one but came upon that one instead. It seems like there are two souls lost and wandering now.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS,The parallels between the two storylines are quite deliberate, as you must have noticed. This is a time of war, and hearts are going to be broken.Thanks for all your support,GhV
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS,The parallels between the two storylines are quite deliberate, as you must have noticed. This is a time of war, and hearts are going to be broken.Thanks for all your support,GhV
Oh, my God. Poor Remus. This came unexpectedly, for me at least (I'm very naive). At least he always had his mother's arms to go to when he needed. The way his memories of his family came flooding over him in his grief ... it is very real, and it paints his desolation well.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS,Alas, Remus always did have to be alone in the world! Are you sure you want to continue with the beta-job? This story seems to be upsetting you far too much.Take a cyber-tissue from me,GhV
Response from notsosaintly (Reviewer)
But of course I want to continue! I have great hopes that there will be some light at the end of the tunnel, however small it may be.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS,Alas, Remus always did have to be alone in the world! Are you sure you want to continue with the beta-job? This story seems to be upsetting you far too much.Take a cyber-tissue from me,GhV
Response from notsosaintly (Reviewer)
But of course I want to continue! I have great hopes that there will be some light at the end of the tunnel, however small it may be.
Remus is such an interesting person that was never really examined in the books. I like this look at his life.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Deare Teshara, I like Remus too! Keep reading, and tell me if you think "my" Remus is true to canon. Regards, GhV
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Deare Teshara, I like Remus too! Keep reading, and tell me if you think "my" Remus is true to canon. Regards, GhV
My heart just breaks for him. The poor little boy. And his poor parents, who were so frightened for him and so frightened to lose him. As a mother, I could feel how heart-wrenching it was for her to shut the garage door and leave Remus there all alone.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, I am proud to have broken your heart! This chapter really upset my son, who was then only seven. He couldn't know how much it upset me to write it - because what if it had been him shut up in that garage? Thanks for reviewing, GhV
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, I am proud to have broken your heart! This chapter really upset my son, who was then only seven. He couldn't know how much it upset me to write it - because what if it had been him shut up in that garage? Thanks for reviewing, GhV
I love the background on Ariadne. This was one of the things I was missing when I read it sporadically. She is rather intuitive, isn't she?
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, Hold that thought - Ariadne's intuition is a major part of the story development. I know it's difficult to interest readers in an OC in the same way as the old canon favourites, so thank you for persevering with Ariadne. Regards, GhV
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, Hold that thought - Ariadne's intuition is a major part of the story development. I know it's difficult to interest readers in an OC in the same way as the old canon favourites, so thank you for persevering with Ariadne. Regards, GhV
Miss McDougal is a very interesting character. Very unusual for a pureblood, and very intuitive. It shows promise for Remus, to be sure.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, You might think of the MacDougals as the "poor nobles" of the wizarding world (a little like the Weasleys). Their importance is completely in their blood rather than their material wealth or political power. This is one factor that is always interacting with both the family culture and Ariadne's own personality. Thanks for reviewing! GhV
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, You might think of the MacDougals as the "poor nobles" of the wizarding world (a little like the Weasleys). Their importance is completely in their blood rather than their material wealth or political power. This is one factor that is always interacting with both the family culture and Ariadne's own personality. Thanks for reviewing! GhV
I love reading a story told from Remus' POV when he was younger. I admit to reading bits and pieces of this story earlier, but now that I am getting to read the story from the beginning, I am enjoying it much more.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, I've only just noticed the string of reviews, and I am so flattered that you bothered to review this story properly after all your patient beta-work! I hope the coherent whole will prove worth reading. Regards, GhV
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear NSS, I've only just noticed the string of reviews, and I am so flattered that you bothered to review this story properly after all your patient beta-work! I hope the coherent whole will prove worth reading. Regards, GhV
*sniffle*I hope there's some romance coming into Remus's life. He deserves it.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Romance? Do you have anyone in mind?The worst IS over now, although he doesn't recognise this yet. Hallowe'en will be the anniversary, yet he will be too distracted by his immediate problems to dwell on it much, a sure sign that he is healing. Anyway, you already know what happens at that party.Thanks for reviewing,GhV
Aha! I thought she was about old enough by this time to be getting to where the story began.It's good to hear about Harry from the point of view of someone so distant from the events.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Yes, we're now (chronologically) close to where we began. And, yes, I did want to highlight Harry as The Boy Who Lived. Although Ariadne will never meet him, she is one of the thousands who knows his story. Thanks for keeping up the reviews.
I didn't enjoy the idea of what was happening to the wizard, but I think it gave context and depth to the death eaters. It's not like they tickled people until they gave in, after all. :)
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
LOLOLOL! Tickling is like torture to me, but I bet that would never occur to the Lestranges!
It's so interesting to read this, knowing who the real traitor was. You've quite cleverly planted clues in Peter's story, but it's interesting to see why Remus and the others didn't pick up on them. Obviously, the whole thing would have become unravelled if Peter had lived.Bravo
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
You know, I didn't consciously "plant" clues. I just wrote out what Peter did, including how he tried to cover his tracks. I think his friends assumed a priori that it wasn't him, and that's how he got away with it. At a time of war, he wasn't the only person to keep secrets and be caught out in the occasional lie, so the inconsistencies in his stories simply weren't noticed.Thank you for being such a consistent reviewer.
How bleak. I think you've drawn an excellent picture of how things must have been for those who lived through the war.How sad Remus's life is becoming.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Yes, I wondered if I dared write anything so depressing. He tells Harry that he has been "shunned and rejected for almost all my adult life", or words to that effect, so we can't have him running through sunny meadows for much of the time, especially not during the war. I am going to give him some happy patches, but not yet.Thank you for keeping up the reviews.
Oh, how sad! *sniff* I really liked Velata! Her death makes sense, but oh, waaaaaaaaaaaaah, I want her back!
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Ariadne wants her back too. I've always been amazed by how much the readers like Veleta; I didn't think she had enough page space to make much of an impact. But I'm glad I made you sniffle for her.There will be more about the circumstances of Veleta's demise in the sequel.
Response from Raira (Reviewer)
Hurray! A sequel! And can we expect the next chapter soon?Not that I'm sitting on the edge of my seat or anything. *cough*
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Since the story is actually finished, the chapters will be posted as fast as the mods can approve them. And I must say that they do a pretty fast job on this site. Please don't fall off your chair. You might hurt your head.
That's very well written; very dark, but appropriate for the circumstances. I feel sorry for the Muggle born wizard, and I thought you did a great job of describing the reaction of the man when he was released from the Imperius curse.Great job.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Yep, nasty, wasn't it? It was hard to strike a balance between having the Death Eaters actually behave like Death Eaters and writing something that a normal person could stomach reading. I'm sure you're far too nice to relish much of this, so thank you for struggling through.
A very good perspective!By the way, this chapter comes up in the chapter list as "Vengeance under Lenten Room".
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Whoops, how embarrassing! I think I've fixed it now.I find the Willow episode difficult because I don't think any of the characters looks rosy; I can only tolerate it by hoping that they all learned something (as I hint in the next chapter).Let's hope JKR tells us more about it eventually.
I liked the way you tied so many threads into this story.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
It only becomes more complex. I didn't set out to do it that way, but so many sub-plots barged in ... if you can follow them all, you're doing well. Actually, a couple of the strands depend on the assumption that the reader WON'T follow them all that well, and will forget important information...
I really enjoyed this chapter!
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Thank you!
Oh how sad. The way you've portrayed Remus's first night as a werewolf is very powerful. I nearly cried.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
,I am sorry I made you cry.No, I'm not. That was a lie. I'm very proud of myself for nearly making you cry. Remus is a tragic character, but not, I think, a self-pitying one. We cry for him because we know he won't cry for himself.Thank you for taking the time to review,GhV
Response from Raira (Reviewer)
I adore Remus. He is probably my favourite male character in the books. I also love having a good cry in stories, so it's all good!
I like Ariadne; and her powers of perception seem to go beyond intelligence. It looks like she has a special magical gift.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Thank you,
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
! I like Ariadne too. I lived with her in my head for two years, so we had to find something to talk about! You don't really find out about her "gift" until chapter 11, but hold that thought - she is quite unlike her parents in outlook.
Wow. I liked that. I can totally see that Remus needed some help, and it'll be interesting to know how his rescuer justifies his behaviour to herself.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
,Thank you for taking the time to tell me so. But I'm afraid you have a long wait ahead. Most of the rest of the story is in flashback, so your question won't be answered until chapter 17. I hope you're a patient reader.Regards,GhV
Response from Raira (Reviewer)
No problem! I am very busily writing right now, but I'm really enjoying reading this story in the breaks. I'm really looking forward to future chapters.
I really enjoyed your vision of Remus's post-Hogwarts life. I never thought what he might have done in between studying and teaching, but I think your idea is inspired. He is a very talented wizard, and he does have to be wary of discovery, so an out-of-the-way post seems like a great solution for him.
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
,Thanks for reviewing! Remus is now very out-of-the-way, and it will stay that way for as long as he can hide his furry little problem.Regards,GhV
The second chapter poses a number of questions. I’ll have to see what the story does with them. My first thought is that the party reminds me of ‘The Hobbit,’ but Bilbo knew some of his guests hated each other. If the MacDougals are trying to heal wounds, having the party on the anniversary of Voldemort’s fall will antagonize half the guests. Aren’t the MacDougals suspicious of a very talented wizard (Remus) working as a drudge? After being raised in such a family, where does Miss MacDougal get her social and psychological insight? It is canon that Remus is poor and an outcast, but is there no way in wizard society for an extremely talented wizard to be an independent artisan who can vanish for three days a month?
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
,So many good questions! I can't answer all of them without giving spoilers, but let's see what I can reveal safely...My first thought is that the party reminds me of ‘The Hobbit,’ but Bilbo knew some of his guests hated each other. If the MacDougals are trying to heal wounds, having the party on the anniversary of Voldemort’s fall will antagonize half the guests.Interesting parallel ... clearly, the MacDougals are not trying to "heal old wounds". Rather, they don't acknowledge that any such wounds exist, because they take it for granted that nobody in any way connected with them could have backed the wrong side. People like the Malfoys encourage this view - they don't want respectable wizards to think badly of them!Aren’t the MacDougals suspicious of a very talented wizard (Remus) working as a drudge?They believe he lacks ambition, but it hasn't occurred to them to think anything worse. He is polite, and he works for them, therefore he cannot be a bad person.After being raised in such a family, where does Miss MacDougal get her social and psychological insight?This question will be answered in chapter 11. However, her separation from her parents' point of view began early in life, as you will see in chapter 3.It is canon that Remus is poor and an outcast, but is there no way in wizard society for an extremely talented wizard to be an independent artisan who can vanish for three days a month? I don't know. JKR would like us to think not. Do we meet any "independent artisans" in canon? (I don't count Mundungus Fletcher.) Most wizards from the middle ranks of society seem to own small businesses in Diagon Alley or similar. Why Remus lost his original job once Voldemort disappeared I will explain later. Why he was in no psychological state to start up a business (aside from having no friends and no financial backing) in the ensuing year will also be explained. I can see why setting himself up as some kind of "independent artisan" who sets his own working hours might be an option in the long term, but this theory would need a convincing explanation for why his business had collapsed by 1993. In my story, he eventually makes a different choice ... but more of that later. Thanks for reading so thoroughly, and for taking the time to put it all down in such a thoughtful review. Happy reading,GhV
Nice introductory chapter. My guess is that the story is for pre-teens, but children's literature is a big unknown to me.Mrs. MacDougal appears dominating in her own quiet way, and her daughter probes into people's lives, too. Lupin is working way below his talent.Isn't anyone worried about the were-wolf amongst the livestock, not to mention the people? Do we find out how Lupin deals with this?
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
Dear
Response from Grace has Victory (Author of Moons of Deceit)
,Thanks for reviewing. But, whoops, I'm way off base if I made you think this was a children's story. I've given it a PG-13, because it's quite mature conceptually. Yes, Mrs MacDougal is quite dominating. Yes, her daughter (the heroine of the story) is very perceptive. Yes, Lupin is working way below his talent - doesn't he state in canon that he was an outsider for most of his adult life?Nobody is worried yet about the werewolf among the livestock because nobody knows about Lupin's little furry problem. There will be more on this topic; however, most of the story is told in flashback, so his relationship with his employers is not a highly developed aspect of the plot.I am really flattered that you were able to ask such perceptive questions about such a short chapter. Thank you so much for your input,GhV