Part Five

Babbity Git, Part Five

~Angry Words~

That cheerful mood lasted until approximately noon...the best he could judge without a watch...the next day, when Miss Granger arrived at the boat, looking as if she had a wand stuffed up her bum.

He was in for it now. Ah, well. He shrugged to himself mentally, and carried on fitting the wooden patch he'd constructed to the troll-sized hole in the hull. He'd ignore her for as long as possible in hopes that she would just... go away.

That was bloody likely.

Fortunately, the girls had abstained from visiting him that morning. They were probably busy re-acquainting themselves with their possessions. Which was for the best, given the head of steam Hermione had apparently built up.

"Eh-hem."

Speak of the engine...

He turned around as slowly as possible. "Good afternoon," he drawled and took a sip of tea from his mug.

Her brow furrowed and her lips pursed, but she watched him drink without comment, her arms crossed tightly in front of her. "Good afternoon," she answered a touch of resentment clear in her tone.

"What brings you to my ship today, Miss Granger?"

She shifted to place a hand on her hip. "What did you say to Annie yesterday?"

"What did she tell you I said?" he parried.

"Nothing," Hermione admitted. "But she's more jumpy than a Crup on a sugar high. She startles every time the hut creaks. And it creaks a lot."

"Annie wanted to show her gratitude by inviting me to kiss her," Severus explained. "So I came on strong and scared her off."

"You what?" Hermione's complexion was a mottle of cream and puce. "You what!" she repeated, outraged.

"It worked." He offered calmly, and took another sip of tea.

"Too well!" she yelled. She took a deep breath and started pacing the floor in front of him. "She's scared witless. Walter, she fancied you. Young girls are very sensitive, you know."

Severus scoffed. "Young girls are sensitive? She'll be fine as soon as she sees me at dinner and I treat her like the others."

"I hope you are right about that," Hermione replied. "Such incidents can scar a girl for life."

He rolled his eyes at her. "Is that all you wanted to speak with me about?"

"As a matter of fact," she huffed, miffed at being dismissed so abruptly. "No, it isn't."

"Can it wait until later?" he asked, setting down his mug to pick up his tools again. "I am busy, you see."

Her eyes narrowed. "No, it can't. You've been putting me off, Walter Zabini, but no more. Not after the visit we had yesterday."

Thar she blows.

She stamped her foot when he didn't answer her. "You infuriate me, you know that? I couldn't sleep last night for fretting, and here you are, calm as a Kneazle. I hate not knowing what's going on!"

He regarded her with amused detachment. It did not make her feel better.

She clenched her hands into fists and resisted the urge to scream like a banshee. "I am being civil, Walter. You will tell me what's going on, this very second, or I will rip your bollocks from your body! I mean it. No more Miss Nice Witch!"

He looked down at her, his face seemingly carved from ice. "I see no difference," he retorted coldly.

She stumbled back on her feet, gasping in shock. For a moment, she looked as if she would faint, before she collapsed onto a pile of lumber. She put her head between her knees, clutching the wood on either side of her so tightly, her knuckles shown white.

He approached her cautiously, confused. His comment had been snide, yes, but not that upsetting, surely? "Are you quite all right, Miss Granger?"

Severus put a hand out to touch her shoulder, and she jumped as if he had burned her. Her head jerked up, and tears ran down her face. "You're alive!" she accused. "You're alive and they knew! They knew!"

His confusion served him well. "What are you on about, girl?"

She stood up suddenly, and he stepped back in a hurry. She followed, poking him in the chest with an insistent and painful finger. "That's why they always asked if the radio was secure! That's why they always sounded so odd! Oh, those code names are so clever! I should have guessed sooner. Willykins. Luckless. Third Brother. Sabre." She snorted in disgust at her own lack of perception. "I'm the one who read those stories to that... traitor! That speccy git!"

Hermione halted briefly, and examined his face with an intensity that shriveled his very soul.

Instead of a Dark Lord, they would have a queen, not dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn! Tempestuous as the sea, and stronger than the foundations of the earth! All would love her and despair!

"You have another radio, don't you?" she asked, bumping him out of his reverie. "Where is it? On this ship?"

He pointed a shaking finger over her shoulder. "In my room."

She grabbed his collar and pulled him along behind her. "Come along, show me where it is."

They entered his room and she crossed to the radio, pedaling and depressing buttons like a professional. She noticed his jaw hanging open and said, "Brown is very accommodating with information if you ask nicely."

He snapped his mouth shut and raised an eyebrow at her.

"It was the only book I had to read for some time," she added primly and pressed the communication button. "Maiden to Stump. Respond."

Willykins answered immediately. "Are they back? Where's Babbity?"

"Not yet and he's right here," said Hermione. "I want to speak with Third Brother." There was a pause and then she added belatedly, "Please."

"He's busy at the moment." Willykins was a very bad liar. Severus winced for him.

Hermione's hair started to crackle into a corona. "Seamus. Get. Harry. Now."

"Yes, sir. I mean, ma'am. Yes, ma'am." He dropped the mic with a thunk that echoed through the radio and made quite a racket in his haste to put distance between himself and Hermione's displeasure.

Severus envied him, just a little bit.

"Hello, Hermione," said Harry, sounding tentative. "How are you?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" She was still very angry, but there was a thick thread of hurt in her voice, too.

The radio fell silent for a few minutes. "We were trying to protect you."

Severus watched every thought and emotion that crossed Hermione's face. Bad move, Potter.

"Protect me?" Hermione's voice climbed to a near shriek by the last syllable. She took a couple of deep breaths to calm down. "From what, may I ask?"

Stubborn and idiotic as ever, Potter replied, "From another breakdown, Hermione."

"It wasn't a breakdown, Harry," Hermione shot back. The hurt in her voice had evaporated. "It was just a crying jag."

"That lasted six months!" Harry answered hotly. "What were we to think? To do? Give you a box of tissue and wait it out? Assume that it was never going to happen again?"

Hermione let the silence stretch, too furious to reply.

Harry began speaking again in a calmer tone. "You were assigned to repairs in the dungeon corridor outside the potions classroom. Ron went looking for you at lunch. And found you sitting at his desk, sobbing over a waistcoat..."

"Shut up, Harry!" barked Hermione, not looking at Severus. Her cheeks were pink.

"No!" Harry said. "You wouldn't stop crying. You wouldn't answer our questions. The only thing that made you feel better was..."

Hermione cut him off, suddenly furious again. "You knew! You knew and you didn't tell me! You knew all along, didn't you? You and Ronald!"

"What?" Harry asked, confused. "What did we know? You wouldn't tell us anyth..."

"You knew that Snape was alive!" she shrieked.

A moment of quiet, and then, "Oh... that."

She glared at the radio, vibrating with rage. "I felt responsible for his death! I felt guilty about leaving him there to die, alone! I had dittany in my purse, and phoenix tears, and what did I do?"

"You conjured a flask for his memories," Harry replied gently. "We had a mission to complete."

She scoffed at him. It was a bitter sound that echoed in the small room. "And that's not even done yet, is it? How very comforting you are, Harry."

"What did you tell her, Snape?" It was more an order than a question.

Severus cleared his throat, and reached for the mic. Hermione dropped it into his hand and moved aside, hugging herself.

"Nothing, you idiot."

"Then how does she know there's a Horcrux on the island?"

"She figured it out by herself, you twat," Severus sneered. "She is the most brilliant witch of our age, after all."

Hermione grimaced at him and he handed the mic over. "Severus is telling you the truth. You just confirmed my theory. I do hope this conversation is secure."

She passed the mic back to Severus and crossed to stand in the doorway.

"This conversation is over," said Severus and dropped the mic on the top of the radio. He turned to Hermione. "What now, Maiden?"

She wrinkled her nose at the code name. "Now, we plan."

~Unwelcome Visitors~

In Severus's experience, planning went two ways:

He sat or stood in a room filled with wizards in black robes and silver masks, who hung on the boss's every word like it was spun from spider silk, agreeing enthusiastically with whatever he said to avoid being tortured. If the boss asked for suggestions, you volunteered as little as possible or suffered the consequences. The Dark Lord had once crucioed Pettigrew for supplying the wrong marmalade at a breakfast meeting.

Or, he sat in a room filled with nebby portraits who couldn't keep their opinions to themselves and hung on the boss's every word like it was spun from spider silk. If the old gaffer asked for suggestions, you volunteered as little as possible, while avoiding both eye contact and lemon sherbets. Minerva McGonagall had confessed to a liking for nude calisthenics under the influence of a Veritaserum-infused sherbet once.

Hermione's idea of planning resembled neither experience. Instead, it consisted of a plethora of itemised lists with colour-coded tasks assigned to each individual involved. And a great deal of reading. If she asked for suggestions, you volunteered everything you could imagine, or you suffered the consequences. Severus was not especially fond of cleaning. It occupied position six on his list, no matter what the season. Which is what made it a favourite detention to bestow. Too bad the girls weren't his students.

In short order, the boat was patched, Horcruxes and wards were researched, and immediately unnecessary supplies were packed in the little beaded bag. Hermione had fully informed the girls of their situation, and Severus's true identity, at a late lunch. Even Jenny had taken it in stride, with Hermione's reassurances. All that remained to be done was an afternoon tea and strategy session. And he was running late for it.

"We need to get the ship off the reef," said Elisabeth, as Severus entered the hut.

Jenny poured him a cup of tea, and placed it next to his Brown biscuits and Marmite. He sat down, after putting the parchment map in the middle of the table. Harry anchored it with coconuts at each corner.

"That'll be a fair trick, even if the reef is outside the wards," Severus said, and popped a biscuit in his mouth.

"The reef is outside the wards?" Hermione's brow wrinkled. "Why didn't you use magic to fix the boat?"

He swallowed before replying, "It helps me think. But I'm not sure it's watertight. We'll need a spell for that."

Hermione made a note on her to-do list.

"I know how to read nautical maps," Harry volunteered.

Another note was made, this time on the skills page. "That's excellent news, Harry."

"I'm not sure my distraction spell will travel with the boat once it moves. I didn't link it." He took a sip of tea.

"We should submerge, until we're out of range," said Elisabeth. Jenny nodded enthusiastically. She approved of hiding.

"That's a very good idea," praised Hermione as she wrote it down on a sheet of parchment entitled 'Master Plan.'

"Harry and I consulted the navigation charts," said Severus. "If you sail around the southern tip of the island, the current will help push the ship up the western coast. Then you can anchor parallel to the Quonset hut and submerge."

"And then what?" asked Hermione, tapping her pen against the table.

"I will radio you when it is safe to surface."

Hermione crossed her arms and glared at him. "Leaving you to deal with the invaders by yourself?"

"Not precisely," replied Severus, crossing his arms as well. "Elisabeth and Jenny will help me rig booby traps while you, Harry and Annie lift the boat off the reef."

"How will we do that? It's very difficult to magically lift an object while standing on it. And the wards won't let us do magic." Sure she was right, Hermione looked a tad smug.

"The Portkey you were using when you ended up here," said Severus. "Was it Ministry-issued?"

"Yes, but what does..." Hermione began. Severus held up a hand to hold her off.

"It was wizard-made, correct?"

Hermione nodded. "As far as I know. There are no female employees in the Department of Transportation except the Head's assistant, and she just handles the paperwork."

"When I accepted this assignment," Severus said, grimacing slightly, "Potter told me that the island's wards allowed for the innate magic of two wizards. Your bag, a very powerful piece of active magic, didn't malfunction when it passed through the wards, but the Portkey did."

Hermione had looked disgruntled at the Ministry's institutional inequalities. Now, her expression ranged from disgust to anger to malicious glee and back again. "That sexist bastard."

"Language, Miss Granger," teased Severus. "But, precise, nonetheless."

"I don't understand," said Annie. All of the girls were confused. Sometimes, adults spoke in a code they didn't understand. And they thought kids were barmy.

Hermione smiled widely. "Mr Snape believes that Lord Voldemort didn't put much faith in feminine power. Which means, girls, that we can do magic."

"And not set off the wards?" Harry asked. She reached for her wand.

Severus held up a hand to stop her. "We should test my theory in increments. Miss Granger, if you will be so kind?"

"My pleasure," Hermione returned, pointing her wand at the coconut teapot. "Wingardium Leviosa!"

The teapot hovered over the table for a few minutes, and the wards did not twinge.

Hermione sent it to the dry sink with the other dirty dishes, filling it with water and soap. She set the dishes to wash themselves. Then, she went out onto the deck, the girls and Severus following behind. She called up a wind that made the palm trees dance and sent a cloud of tropical birds into the air.

Not even a whine or a hint of pressure from the wards.

The girls all whooped and hollered, doing a joyous jig. Hermione joined in for a bit while Severus watched with amusement.

She broke off from the boisterous group and skipped over to him. "We still have one big problem," Hermione said, shaking the hair out of her eyes.

"And what would that be?" Severus asked, reaching out to tuck a wayward curl behind her ear.

She squeaked when his fingertips brushed her sensitive earlobe, and they both froze for a moment, looking into each other's eyes.

"Um..." Hermione cleared her throat and rocked back on her heels. "The wards inside the cave, protecting the Horcrux."

"Oh, yes." Severus breathed deeply through his nose, in an attempt to find focus. "I can show you what they look like."

Hermione beamed at him, and then turned to face the girls, who had settled down onto the crates, watching the grownups with rapt interest.

"Annie, you are in charge while Severus shows me the wards. Please make sure everyone understands their assignments for tomorrow."

Annie nodded, herding the girls back into the hut to look over task lists. Severus led Hermione across the stream and through the underbrush to the lone flowering jasmine bush on the island. He knelt at its base, and Hermione followed suit, peering down through the roughly carved hole in the ground nearby.

"I know I've seen an aura of magic like this before," said Severus when the silence stretched thin between them. "But I can't place where."

"Not around Lord Voldemort?" Hermione asked. Her voice was strained.

"No. That I'm sure of." Severus thought long and hard. "But it might have been in connection with him. It seems all wrong for Hogwarts or Albus."

"Definitely all wrong, I should hope," said Hermione. She looked up at him anxiously. "I read about this aura in 'Moste Dark Spells.' It's an Unbreakable Vow. Adulterated by Avada Kedavra."

"Intended to kill all but the most loyal," Severus said.

Hermione nodded. "This changes everything."

"No." Severus shook his head. "It doesn't."

She stared at him fiercely until he looked at her. "We are not leaving you here alone, Severus."

He gave her a bemused half-smile. "You won't have to."

~Running from Danger~

The next day dawned bright and sunny, with a pleasant breeze that kept them from overheating, but the ragtag little troop on the island had barely a moment to enjoy the good weather.

After a breakfast of tinned sausages, brown biscuits and orange marmalade with tea, Hermione split the group in two parts.

"Divide and conquer!" she called cheerfully, leading Annie and Harry down the path to the Bulgarian ship, a copy of the parchment map in hand. Xs marked the spots where Severus, Jenny and Elisabeth intended to lay traps for the anticipated intruders. Though the traps were meant to incapacitate and hold their enemies, rather than maim or kill, time was of the essence and they couldn't afford to lose any of it to "friendly fire."

Severus watched them go, while Jenny and Elisabeth organized lengths of rope and tested slip knots. "Keep your eyes peeled!" he called after them.

"No yelling!" Harry retorted.

He crossed his eyes at Jenny and Elisabeth, before motioning to the path at the rear of the Quonset hut that led to the stream. "We might as well start here."

They only had enough materials for ten traps, so locations had been picked with strategy in mind. The hut, though camouflaged, was not invisible and would likely draw attention when discovered. Traps were set on the path to the stream and the path to the lagoon.

The underbrush near the flowering jasmine bush was another prime spot, due to the escape hatch for the cavern below. It was probable that the Death Eaters would know a detection spell or two. Severus was not one to leave things to chance. They set four traps in various locales near the bush.

They then rigged a trap at the mouth of the Horcrux cave, dropping it over the cliffs, measuring precisely as they lowered it, according to the measurements Severus had scouted in a tense trip to the atoll the previous day.

The last three traps were set back from the dock in the surrounding underbrush, spaced widely apart. Severus shared his assumption that the wards preventing the Death Eaters from invading en masse could only be removed by an individual on the island itself. The girls had unanimously agreed that the dock was the most obvious target.

Done with their duty, they joined the others at the cove. They arrived to see much progress had been made. Hermione had removed the spell from the atoll rowing boat, and Harry had constructed a rigging to hold it to the Bulgarian ship. The rowing boat was tied to the dock, ready to be rowed out to the ship. Annie, Hermione and Harry had also lifted the ship off the reef, using Wingardium Leviosa.

"Sometimes, simple is best." Annie explained brightly. It had been her suggestion.

They had anchored the ship just east of the reef and south of the atoll.

Hermione was in the process of casting another watertight spell as Severus's team approached the trio standing ankle deep in water on the cove's shore.

She pointing her wand at the ship, tracing its outline as she chanted, "Aqua Repellenda! Aqua Repellenda! Aqua Repellenda!"

"Shouldn't you have done that before lifting the ship off the reef?" Severus enquired, tongue in cheek.

Hermione rolled her eyes and Annie responded for her. "Miss Granger did cast it before. She's just being thorough."

"I see my distraction spell has dissipated," Severus commented, in lieu of remarking on Hermione's thoroughness. Merlin help the Ministry when she became Dark Queen. Accountability was a foreign concept to their government, even under Kingsley Shacklebolt's guidance.

Hermione nodded and bit her lip. "As Annie says, sometimes simple is best. I think we need a secret keeper."

"That doesn't work without a permanent location," Severus stated.

"Yes, well," Hermione said, avoiding Severus's gaze. "Harry and I determined the exact latitude and longitude where we'll drop anchor. That should do the trick."

Severus shook his head emphatically. "The girls' safety is paramount, Granger. You can't be stuck in one place when the invasion happens."

"But we're going to be submerged anyway, sir!" Elisabeth protested.

"It's just so they don't have a target, if they pursue you, sir," added Annie.

"It seems I'm outnumbered," said Severus. Every female head nodded with fierce conviction. "I cede to your solidarity, though I do not agree."

At least they would be moderately safe off the island. He had expected an argument from Granger about staying on the ship.

"I need a volunteer to be secret keeper," said Hermione.

A determined look on her face, Jenny stepped forward first.

"Are you sure?" Hermione asked softly. Jenny nodded her head. "Come with us, then."

Hermione walked to the dock, everyone following in her wake. Part way there, she turned around, her brow furrowed. "Someone needs to stay behind, to check that the Fidelius charm is working."

"As in, go to the hut and wait for a radio call of the location?" asked Severus, turning towards the lagoon path.

"Yes, but also to look west out at the ocean as you hike up the path, to try and see the ship," Hermione answered. "I'll cast Fidelius when we get on board. We will be parallel with the beginning of the cliff path once we arrive on that side of the island."

Severus nodded, heading to the lagoon.

"I'm getting hungry," said Elisabeth. "I'll go with Mr Snape and make lunch." She scampered after him.

"Thank you," called Hermione, leading the rest of the group to the rowing boat. "We should be there in less than an hour."

The girls clambered into the boat, and Annie and Harry each took an oar. They reached the ship in short order, and climbed aboard. Hermione performed the Fidelius charm on Jenny, whispering the boat's intended location in her ear.

She also put a charm on Harry's wand to buzz a warning as they approached their destination. Then Harry took the helm, while Annie weighed anchor. They set sail for the west side of the island, Hermione encouraging the breeze magically to hurry them along.

A short time later, Harry's wand vibrated on a pile of nautical maps, sounding like an angry honeybee. "Drop anchor in three," she called.

Annie and Hermione lowered the anchor on Harry's count, turning the bolt of chain wound on a handled spool over smoothly, as one.

Then Hermione went below deck to Severus's room to call the hut.

"Hut, this is ship calling," she said, pressing the communication button.

Severus responded immediately. "This is hut. Have you arrived?"

"Yes," Hermione answered. "Could you see us at all?"

"No," he said. "What's your location?"

"Seventeen degrees twenty-five minutes sixty seconds south, and one hundred sixty-eight degrees twenty minutes sixty seconds east."

"Just a moment," he said. Hermione heard him relay the location to Elisabeth in the background. "She's going to check."

A few moments later, Elisabeth ran back into the hut. "I can see them!" she yelled.

"It's a success," said Severus.

Hermione smiled, even if he couldn't see it. "So I heard."

"Yes, well," Severus said, sounding amused. "Lunch is ready, so come and get it."

"We'll be right there," Hermione replied and shut the radio down.

She climbed the stairs to the spar deck and helped Harry lower the rowing boat to the water. Annie threw the rope ladder over the ship's side, and they climbed down it one by one, Harry leaving last.

"You're a good captain," said Jenny, cuddling into her side, as Hermione and Annie rowed them to shore. They tied the boat to a nearby palm tree and raced up the path to lunch.

After lunch, Hermione took one look at the tired faces surrounding her and suggested a nap. Severus studied at the circles under her eyes and volunteered to take first watch with a pair of Muggle binoculars Hermione produced from her beaded bag.

He left the hut to sit on a crate on the front deck, and raised the binoculars to the sky, scanning the horizon over the atoll.

Severus flexed the slits on either side of his throat in concert with his webbed feet and propelled himself across the crystal clear water of the cove towards the coral reef with a silky whoosh. Eddies of water billowed in his wake as he glided through the sunlit shallows.

His little friends the seahorses named Romaine and Dandelion drifted by, followed by Milky Joe, who winked at him and put a tendril of coconut hair to his pursed lips. Severus crossed his heart in response. He hoped to...

Romaine turned to look at him, her green eyes sad, yet kind. Her leafy branches grew into fingertips, then hands and at last, arms. She waved good bye, tickled Milky Joe under the chin, and glided off in a whirl of bubbles.

Where was Dandelion?

A hypnotic silvery voice lilted out a giggle as he caught a glimpse of glittery red scales and long mane-like hair just ahead, darting in and out of the coral. He kicked out again and his reaching fingers brushed against a diaphanous fin. He chuckled with predatory fervour as the fin jumped slightly and then shivered in delight. He swooped suddenly and caught his Piscean nymph by the waist and murmured, "Tag, you're it," in her perfect shell-like ear.

But she wasn't laughing anymore. She turned to face him, concern filling her bright brown eyes and said, "Severus! Severus! It's my turn to keep watch." Hermione was standing over him, a hint of mischief in her eyes. "Are the inside of your eyelids free of enemies?"

He latched onto her ankle and tugged weakly. "Shut it, missy. I had a long day today."

"We all did," she replied, kneeling next to him on the deck. "But we're ready. Go get some real sleep."

He rose, too tired to respond properly. He gave her a lazy wave and entered the hut, falling headfirst into Hermione's bunk. Her bedclothes smelled like jasmine with a hint of green tea.

~Being Followed~

All that remained were the bedclothes on the bunks and the pedal radio. Even the whisky and his coconut friends had been transferred to the ship, along with everything else, after their afternoon nap.

He had smirked at the look on Hermione's face when she discovered the ship's working heads. Priceless.

Later, they ate dinner in near silence, the clang of spoons against bowls and cups echoing oddly in the tunnel-like hut. Elisabeth and Severus did the dishes, while the other girls settled into their bunks with books from the beaded bag. Hermione packed the utensils, dinnerware and every bit of food left in the almost bare room.

"I just have a feeling," said Hermione when Severus shot her a questioning look.

Her 'feeling' was spot on.

Under the light of a full moon, Severus watched a sleek ship round the atoll and head for the coral reef, dropping anchor just short of it. Two figures were lowered in a rowing boat, and they made for the dock in a slow pull. He adjusted his binoculars for a better look.

Amycus Carrow jumped to shore and, touching the Mark on his left arm with the wand in his right, uttered a chant that Severus could not hear, as far as he was from them.

He felt a change in the atmosphere, as though an insistent pressure had been lifted, and watched with grim determination as the other figure jumped onto the dock next to Carrow. It was his sister, Alecto.

Not the best choice for testing lowered wards. Severus was gratified to realise the Death Eaters didn't know everything. It evened the playing field. Except that he had home advantage.

Three more rowing boats were lowered from the ship, each with six figures in them. They were using magic now, for Severus could detect no movement on their spar deck.

Twenty in all. Perhaps a few more than expected, but still a manageable sum, with help from the booby traps. He needed to warn the girls. Thinking of Hermione, flat on her bum in the cove, trying to fish, Severus chuckled quietly.

"Expecto Patronum!" he said, under his breath. He tilted his head, eyeing the silvery figure waiting for his command. The doe had departed, it seemed, when Lily left his heart. A new creature had taken her place. The weedy sea horse, Dandelion. He whispered instructions, and it glided toward the hut, keeping low to evade detection.

Severus turned back to watch the three boats draw closer to the island. Hurry, Hermione. Hurry.

At the hut, the girls and Hermione were reading quietly when the seahorse Patronus glided through the open doorway and floated to her side.

"Leave now," it said with Severus's voice. "They are here. I will call you when it's over. Be safe." The sea horse melted away.

"All right, girls. You heard Mr Snape, it's time to leave. Get your shoes on, quickly," said Hermione.

She thought of Severus's mouth on her leg and summoned her Patronus. It glided around her on its back, waving narrow front paws in her direction. Her otter wasn't the same, but she couldn't put a finger on what was different. She whispered a reply to it for Severus and hustled the girls out of the hut.

Hermione stopped at the top of the trail to the lagoon and followed the girls' worried stares eastward. They were looking at three rowing boats filled with figures, headed for the island.

"Come on," she said. "We don't have much time."

They skidded down the trail as silently as possible to their little boat. Annie untied the moorings while everyone climbed in, jumping in last. Harry and Hermione rowed to the ship, and Annie held the ladder for Jenny.

Hermione gave Jenny and Harry a hard hug. "You know what do, Harry. Radio Stump and have Jenny give them the ship's location. Then get the ship ready to submerge if needed. Keep a close watch, Jenny. If you see a purple flare, that's your signal to radio Stump again and submerge. Got that?"

They both nodded, and climbed the rope, pulling it up behind them. Annie and Hermione sat down again, preparing to row.

"Wait a tick!" called Harry softly. "Catch this!" She dropped her cricket bat into Annie's outstretched hands. "Hit 'em where it hurts, like I showed you, Elisabeth!"

Elisabeth grinned at her as Annie handed her the bat. "I will!"

They returned to the island.

Hermione double-checked for her wand and consulted the parchment map copy. "They've just reached shore. Severus is hiding in the brush above the mouth of the cave."

"That's the trap that needs to be set off by someone," said Elisabeth. She looped her belt around the cricket bat and checked her pockets for her other supplies.

"Still have your stink bombs?" Hermione asked.

Elisabeth nodded, a gleam of malicious intent in her eyes.

"I know a man who will hire you in six or seven years," said Hermione absently. "Are you ready, Annie?"

"As I'll ever be," Annie replied with conviction. She would not let Mr Snape fight alone.

Hermione looked over the map again. "One down. He walked into a trap by the dock. Nice work, keeping them silent. The traps and our prey."

Annie patted Elisabeth on the back.

"We'd better hide further down the beach. Most of them are coming right for us."

They ran for the coconut palms and ducked behind a fallen trunk, lying flat on their bellies. All eyes were glued to the map, watching the dots move.

"Twelve on the lagoon path," whispered Annie.

Elisabeth pointed. "Two watching their ship."

"Five looking for their missing friend," hissed Hermione. "Oops. Four now. Good job again, Elisabeth."

They held their breath, watching as the largest group approached the point where the path became a trail to the hut. Or headed towards them, in the opposite direction.

The Death Eaters were so close now, the girls could hear them discussing their plans.

"Brother," said a female voice. "Cast the detection charms again."

The girls heard someone murmuring spells too low to hear clearly. Carrow probably didn't trust some of his companions.

"It's still not working," he said, speaking up at last.

Another man spoke. "It's this great ruddy cliff. The rock is blocking your magic. We have to go higher."

Several of the group made sounds of agreement.

"Shouldn't we check the beach?" A lone dissenter called out.

Hermione, Annie and Elisabeth froze in place. No, no, no, no you shouldn't.

The female voice spoke again. "What for, coconuts?"

The group surrounding her guffawed loudly. Hermione saw Severus's dot shift out of hiding suddenly. He must've checked the map.

"Plenty of time for that later, Smith," the female said dismissively.

The group trudged up the trail under the girls' watchful eyes and Severus settled back into his hiding spot. One of the group lagged behind the rest. Hermione wondered if it was Smith, turning to look at the beach or if it was another Death Eater, apparently out of shape. Either way, it didn't matter anymore.

"Third one down," Hermione whispered. She pointed to the group of dots that milled about for a moment near the Quonset hut. "I think they're calling for him."

They eased to sitting positions, looking between the map and the cliffs, where the Quonset hut was located.

"Did you see that?" hissed Annie.

Hermione had been watching the map. "No. What was it?"

"A ball of glittering smoke above the cliffs. It stayed still for a minute and then moved towards Mr Snape, fast," answered Elisabeth.

"The detection spell is working. The whole group is following it. We'd better get up there."

They kept low and scaled the trail. At the top, Hermione drew her wand, and Elisabeth led her to the trapped invader. It was Smith after all. Zacharias Smith, to be precise. The arrogant prick. Hermione took a great deal of pleasure in Stupefying him. Just to be safe.

The dots were congregated on the tableland now, all eleven left of the mission team. There were two dots still guarding the ship, and three searching for their missing companions.

"Four down," Hermione whispered as she and the girls crossed the stream near the base of the crater and hid in the overgrown brush nearby. They watched the map as some of the main team dots moved toward Severus. One froze suddenly.

Elisabeth grinned. "Five down," she whispered.

"Five down," Severus echoed to himself unknowingly, watching four dots creep closer to his position. He glanced at the three dots situated near the base of the crater. Stay there. Please stay there.

The Carrow siblings and their two sidekicks stopped not ten metres from him. Amycus cast another detection spell. The ball of glittering smoke rose in the air and split in two, one half diving over the cliff very near Severus, and the other soared back across the brush to the flowering jasmine bush. Or Severus assumed it did, since he could not see that far through the underbrush.

"Which way, Brother?" asked Alecto.

The cliff, you lazy sod. It's closer.

"The cliff," said Amycus, parroting Severus's thoughts. "It's closer."

~Safe at Last~

"They're at the cliff!" said Annie. She held up the map for Hermione to see.

Elisabeth thought for a moment. "That booby trap should slow them down for at least twenty minutes. We used the magically reinforced rope on it."

"All right," said Hermione, letting her binoculars hang at her neck. "We have about five minutes to do some damage. How good are you at defensive spells, Annie?"

"Top in my class," Annie replied, dropping into a defensive stance.

"Brilliant," said Hermione. "I knew there was a reason I brought you along."

Severus Disillusioned himself, the cold, slimy feeling creeping over his body as he watched the Carrows walk closer to the cliff.

"The detection spell is hovering midway down the cliff face, Brother," Alecto said, her voice triumphant. "Jump, and I will halt your momentum as you fall to the mouth of the cave."

"Why me? Why don't we send one of them?" Amycus asked, pointing at their companions.

"Because, dear Brother, they are new recruits and do not bear the Mark as we do. The Dark Lord's wards will kill them instantly. Now, don't be such a ninny."

Amycus approached the edge of the cliff, looking extremely dubious.

"Go on," Alecto urged. "Remember, the Dark Lord will reward you for your valour."

He crept silently behind them and waited for Amycus to jump. Once he did, screaming girlishly as he fell, Severus picked up the trip wire. The trio at cliff's edge weren't going to look his way.

"Arresto Momentum!" cried Alecto, twirling an extra flourish with her wand. "Stop crying, you ponce. Have a little faith in your sister."

Amycus realised he wasn't falling anymore and ceased blubbering.

"You should be even with the cave opening, now!" she shouted. "Can you see it?"

"Yes!" Amycus yelled back. "It's very narrow. I'm on the ledge..."

Severus pulled the trip wire sharply. It made a zipping noise that caught one of the Goon's attention. Severus wordlessly Stupefied him before the goon could open his mouth. He dropped like a rock.

"Hey," said the other goon, pointing to his friend. "Martin just fainted!"

"What," Alecto asked icily, turning to look, "kind of incompetents are you?"

Her brother gave another girlish scream that drew Alecto's attention away before the goon could give her an answer.

"My foot is stuck! My foot is stuck!" Amycus yelled.

Alecto was hacked off. Could these minions do nothing right? "Get it unstuck, then!" she screamed.

"I caaaaaaaaaaaaaaan't." Amycus whinged.

"You," Alecto said, pointing her wand at the gaping goon. "Get over here."

"My name is Benedict," he mumbled, shuffling over to her side.

Alecto rolled her eyes at him. "All right. Benedict." She gestured at the cliff's edge. "Jump."

"Er..." Benedict said, looking over the edge. "Why?"

"Wrong answer," said Alecto, and she pushed him. Benedict screamed girlishly as he fell, and Alecto muttered something to herself about a lack of qualified help and the good old days. "Arresto Momentum!"

Hermione Disillusioned the girls and herself, and they sneaked up on the six goons loitering on the tableland. She and Annie neatly Stunned five goons in a matter of seconds, but the sixth one kept running at them, despite being hit several times. He was quite a bit bigger than his downed companions, and it dawned on Hermione, almost too late, why the Stunning curse didn't affect him.

Annie stumbled back quickly to avoid his grabbing hands, and just before he managed to catch the tail of her shirt, Elisabeth cracked him over the head with Harry's cricket bat. He dropped like a sack of potatoes. She followed up with a blow to his stomach that had him gasping for air.

"Incarcerous," said Hermione. Ropes flew out of her wand and bound the winded man tightly.

"Why...?" began Annie.

Hermione cut her off. "He's half-giant, probably. Magic doesn't work as well on them."

"Cricket bats work just fine, though," said Elisabeth.

"Thank Merlin for that," Hermione answered. She cast a Tempus charm. "Come on, we need to disable the Death Eater ship."

They raced across the tableland, crossing the stream in record time, before pelting down the trail to the lagoon. Checking the guards' positions on the map...and noting that another of the search party had fallen victim to a trap, leaving two recruits wandering aimlessly...they crept down the path toward the dock as quietly as possible.

Annie pointed her wand at the smaller guard. "Stupefy!" she whispered.

"Stupefy!" hissed Hermione a millisecond later, and the guards slumped against each other, falling prostrate on the dock.

They stood on the water's edge and pointed their wands at the Death Eater ship. "Reducto! they cried together.

Meanwhile, Severus was listening to poor Benedict as he tried to free a petulant Amycus from the booby trap at the mouth of the Horcrux cave. It was a variation of a Chinese finger puzzle that Elisabeth had packed with her chemistry set. Amycus, struggling to get out of it, bound his foot more tightly. Only by relaxing his foot, and pushing inward, would he free himself.

"Hey!" Amycus cried with surprise. "If I kick, my foot isn't caught anymore." He kicked again. "It's working!" he crowed.

Unfortunately, Benedict's hand was gripping Amycus's foot, and as he swung it into the cave, he brought Benedict's hand with it, through the loyalty wards, incinerating the poor sod instantly.

Or Severus assumed as much, from Amycus's prolonged "Eeeeeeeeeeeeew!" followed by a dozen sneezes.

"Are you free?" called Alecto impatiently, tapping her wand on a nearby rock.

Amycus's voice echoed distantly. "Yes! I'm going in!" Severus could barely hear him now. "It's amazing in here!"

"I want to see!" shrieked Alecto. "I'm going in the other way!" She raced for the blooming jasmine bush, where the detecting spell she'd just cast was hovering. Severus followed her very carefully after wordlessly casting a spell to seal the entrance behind her brother.

Alecto dropped to her knees and peered into the cave. "Where are you, Amycus?"

She failed to notice that her entourage had been Stupefied. It did not escape Severus's attention. He relaxed his guard a little.

"I'm getting closer, Alecto!"

"I can't see past the wards," she yelled. "Is it very far down?"

"Why don't you find out?" asked Severus, and her pushed her into the hole. She screamed girlishly as she fell.

"Arresto Momentum!" Amycus cried, in what sounded like the nick of time.

Severus was slightly annoyed. The lazy arse had ruined a perfectly good exit line.

"Finite Incantantum!" exclaimed Alecto. "There's someone up there! He pushed me!"

"Do you think it was Martin?" asked Amycus.

Alecto growled in irritation. "No. Martin is far too stupid. Besides, I left him out cold by the cliff's edge. Never mind that. Just grab the Horcrux, and let's get out of here."

Not so fast, thought Severus. He conjured Fiendfyre into the cave and sealed the hole shut with a charm. That was for Crucioing children. He stood up, dusting off his hands, just as a massive crack of splintering wood echoed across the island. Severus consulted the parchment map, taking in the situation in an instant.

Hermione, Annie and Elisabeth were racing along the lagoon path, two Death Eaters in hot pursuit. Severus let out an angry bellow and sped across the tableland to the waterfall. A running leap hurtled him into the air, and he flailed for a moment before he remembered how to fly. It was a little awkward without his customary robes, but he reached the path head which led to where the rowing boat was moored to a palm tree just before the Lestrange brothers did. He removed the Disillusionment charm and the St. Anthony's medal and spun to face them, wand out in a duelling stance.

"Snape!" cried Rodolphus, hurling a Rotting Hex at him.

Severus dodged to the left and riposted with Sectumsempra, producing a shallow cut in Rodolphus's thigh.

Rabastan threw a Reducto at him and attempted to run by him toward the beach.

Snape stopped him in his tracks with a Petrificus Totalus. He could hear the girls clamber into the boat and the splash of the oars as they rowed away from shore.

Rodolphus grinned evilly and turned on his heel to Disapparate. Severus caught the corner of his cloak in a desperate lunge. When they popped back into the air moments later, Severus looked down and saw Hermione commanding the rowing boat magically, while the Elisabeth and Annie huddled on the opposite bench.

He looked up to see Rodolphus's boot hurtling at him in extreme close up. It caught him on the chin, and he lost his grip on the bastard's cloak. He started to fall, and Rodolphus laughed triumphantly, hovering above him on a broom. Rodolphus dismissed him with a sneer and turned to aim a curse at the rowing boat. Severus caught himself, soaring to intercept the curse with a Protego.

Rodolphus howled in disappointment and came at him viciously, throwing curses as fast as Severus could deflect them. This went on for several long minutes before they both began to tire.

Severus saw his chance when Rodolphus paused to wipe the sweat from his eyes. "Sectumsempra!"

The spell slashed across Rodolphus's chest, and blood welled in its wake. Rodolphus stared at Severus in amazement as his broom faltered beneath him. Severus watched the wounded man fall into the ocean. Rodolphus did not surface.

Then he floated wearily to the spar deck of the Bulgarian ship and landed face to face with Neville Longbottom.

"Sir Luckless, I presume," he muttered, wavering on his feet.

Neville glowed with admiration. "Blimey, sir. That was brilliant!"

"Do you have an authorised Portkey on you, Luckless?" Severus asked as Hermione rushed to his side. He slung an arm around her shoulders and drew her in close.

"Yes, sir, I do," Neville answered. The girls surrounded them.

He looked Longbottom straight in the eye. "Set it for England and get off this ship."

"But, sir!" Neville protested. "We were hoping you would..."

"No," said Severus. "I am going to Australia."

The girls cheered, and Hermione hugged him tightly.

"Australia?" Neville asked, dumbfounded.

Severus thumbed his nose at him. "If you don't happen to like it, piss off."

"Severus!" Hermione scolded. "Language."

He tilted her head back gently and kissed her, while Harry wolf-whistled and the rest of the girls giggled madly.

Her eyes were glazed when he drew back several minutes later. "Wow!" she murmured dreamily, "You really don't kiss like a fish."

Severus couldn't help but laugh and hug her closer.

~Several Months Later~

They sat alone at the kitchen table, blissfully quiet in the early morning sunshine. The much cherished calm before the gaggle of their girls descended. He took a bite of Marmite-slathered toast and dropped his paper to contemplate her as she stirred sugar into her tea.

"What?" she asked, suppressing a yawn.

"What," he parroted teasingly, "made you feel better during your crying jag?"

She blushed a lovely pale shade of pink. "Oh, no. It's too embarrassing."

Severus just looked at her.

"Oh, all right," Hermione said, rolling her eyes at him. "I would smell your waistcoat."

He smirked at her and brought her hand to his lips for a kiss.

~Author Notes for Babbity Git~

(For all links, remove all spaces before and after slashes [/] and periods [.])

Babbity Git is re-hash of Father Goose, a movie set in the South Pacific during World War II.

http: // en . Wikipedia . org / wiki / Father_Goose_(film)

S.H. Barnett, Peter Stone and Frank Tarloff wrote the screenplay and the original story the screenplay was based upon.

The section titles of Babbity Git were borrowed from the chapter titles of the 2000 dvd edition produced by Republic Entertainment, Inc.

Some dialogue is quoted verbatim or slightly modified from the following scenes: Fishing Lesson, Snake Bite, Drinking Partners, Not a Snake.

Severus's cobbled-together false identity is a partial nod to the main character, Walter Eckland, played by Cary Grant.

"... containing a really rather magnificent collection of chamber pots." GoF, ch. 20 p. 417 (US hrdcvr)

Gryffindor's mace was most likely flanged.

http: // en . wikipedia . org / wiki / Mace_(club)

Saint Anthony is the patron saint of lost souls in the Catholic faith. Zabini has an interesting sense of humour. The link is an example of a St Anthony's medal. (I like to think this is the one Severus wears.)

http: // www . sistersofcarmel . com / pics / st-anthony-of-padua-medal-s1566-tn . jpg

I owe thanks to Mollyssister (for demanding Mermaid fic) and Somigliana (for writing The Silvering Divide) - where I derived the inspiration for Mermaid Lily/Hermione.

All code names were borrowed from The Tales of Beedle the Bard by JK Rowling.

Jackson Pollock was a mid-century abstract artist. He occasionally used bodily fluids to "enhance" his work.

http: // en . Wikipedia . org / wiki / Jackson_Pollock

Father Goose is set in the New Hebrides, now known as Vanuatu - Severus's island is a figment of my imagination, but consider it part of this group - an uncharted high island. At approximately 16° 0' S and 167° 0' E.

http: // en . wikipedia . org / wiki / Pacific_Islands

Information about Quonset Huts.

http: // en . Wikipedia . org / wiki / Quonset_hut

Weather information for the South Pacific: The cyclone season took place from Nov 2002 - April 2003 during Babbity Git's timeframe. You'll notice I fudged the dates, location and category strength of Tropical Cyclone Cilla - but really, who could pass up that name? Not me. (Love you, Cilla! You are an awesome cyclone.)

http: // en . Wikipedia . org / wiki / 2002%E2%80%9303_South_Pacific_cyclone_season

http: // www . mysailing . com . au / news / weathering-the-south-pacific

The invention of pedal radios is a fascinating read. I love research.

http: // en. Wikipedia . org / wiki / Pedal_radio

http: // www . antiqueradio . com / traeger_pedal_07-99 . html

http: // tomahawksadventuretravel . blogspot . com / 2010 / 08 / aussie-coast-watchers-in-ww2 . html

Talking Radio Manual Brown's lines are quoted directly from Fm 24-6 - Radio Operator's Manual Army Ground Forces - 1945.

http: // www . scribd . com / doc / 37287262 / Fm-24-6-Radio-Operator-s-Manual-Army-Ground-Forces-1945

Information about UK Field Rations and Hexamine stoves (Tommy Cookers).

http: // en . wikipedia . org / wiki / Field_ration

http: // www . mreinfo . com / images / gallery-uk/brat-24-orp-menu . jpg

http: // www . mreinfo . com / international / great-britain / british-24-hour-ration-packs . html

History of Scouts in the UK –

http: // en . Wikipedia . org / wiki / The_Scout_Association

The coconut named Milky Joe was borrowed from The Mighty Boosh (Season 2, episode 6 "The Nightmare of Milky Joe")

http: // mightyboosh .wikia . com / wiki / The_Nightmare_of_Milky_Joe

The Palm Court in the Langham Hotel has been serving afternoon tea since 1865.

http: // London . langhamhotels . co . uk / restaurants / palm_court.htm

"Who was that lady I saw you with last night?"

"That was no lady; that was my wife." - Joke attributed to Lew Fields & Joe Weber, a vaudeville comedy team of the early twentieth century (not verified).

"Instead of a Dark Lord, you would have a queen, not dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn! Tempestuous as the sea, and stronger than the foundations of the earth! All shall love me and despair!" - From The Lord of the Rings, Part One: The Fellowship of the Ring, Book Two: Chapter VII, The Mirror of Galadriel (Thanks to Juno_Magic).

"I see no difference." - GoF, ch. 18 p. 300 (US hrdcvr.)

Aqua Repellenda - To make water-tight. Many thanks to Juniperus for the Latin help.

The differences between river otters and sea otters are detailed in this link.

http: // riverotters .tribe . net / thread / cb6affb4-3ab6-4349-9525-45215a57bc24

Songs included in Babbity Git:

Show Me the Way to Go Home

http: // en . Wikipedia . org / wiki / Show_Me_the_Way_to_Go_Home

http: // www . youtube . com / watch?v=mw0XSkpHvBE

Show me the way to go home, I'm tired and I want to go to bed.

Oh, I had a little drink about an hour ago, and it went right to my head.

Wherever I may roam, on land or sea or foam.

You will always hear me singing this song: Show me the way to go home.

Fancy word version of Show Me the Way to Go Home:

Indicate the way to my habitual abode, I'm fatigued and I want to retire.

Oh, I had a little liquid sixty minutes ago, and it went right to my cerebellum.

Wherever I may perambulate, on land or sea or atmospheric bubbles.

You will always hear me humming this melody: Indicate the way to my habitual abode.

Seven Drunken Nights

http: // en . wikipedia . org / wiki / Seven_Drunken_Nights

http: // www . youtube . com / watch?v=4aRHHw6Sma0

(thanks to Mundungus42, who mentioned this song in a buzz)

Pass Me By (The theme song for Father Goose)

Lyrics by Carolyn Leigh, Music by Cy Coleman, Sung by Digby Wolfe

YouTube link #1 - http: // www . youtube . com / watch?v=C-F3vSrJIUQ

YouTube link #2 - http: // www . youtube . com / watch?v=JgJccx2i0ho

British schoolyard songs:

Ten In A Bed

There were ten in a bed

And the little one said

'Roll over, roll over'

So they all rolled over

And one fell out

This continues with:

There were nine in a bed

And the little one said...etc

And finishes with:

There was one in a bed

And the little one said

'Good night!'

Schoolyard games included in Babbity Git:

Conkers - http: // www . videojug . com / film / how-to-win-at-conkers

One traditional method of cheating at Conkers is to feed the chestnut to a pig. The nut will harden in the pig's stomach juices, and the hardened nut can then be found in the pig's waste.

Foxy - http: // www . bbc . co . uk / dna / h2g2/A707870

I'd LOVE LOVE LOVE (AND HUGS) to thank Annietalbot. She's an awesome friend, and an awesome Slytherin and I can't tell you how glad I am that she loves Father Goose as much as I do.

I am really, really, really glad.

Last, but not least: a virtual mega ton of thanks and hugs to my betas, Scatteredlogic & Bluestocking79. And to my britpicker, Dickgloucester. You ladies rock for all the right reasons. And probably some of the wrong ones, too. ~winks~

Map of Island

Blueprint of Quonset Hut (Not to Scale) –