Taking Over Me

I believe in you

I'll give up everything just to find you

I have to be with you

To live

To breathe

You're taking over me

~ "Taking Over Me" by Evanescence

Once again I found myself in the fourth floor corridor, standing in front of the doors to the library. I looked left, then right and was relieved to find nothing charging at me. I took a deep breath and pushed the doors open.

"The Dark Arts In Colour: A Comprehensive Guide to Curse Appearance. Someone wrote a book on curse colors? This can't be it."

Next, I selected one titled, Whither Thou Goest, which seemed plausible.

I thought about that question for a few moments, and then the answer I'd been looking for struck me.

"That's it!" I yelped as I shot straight up in my bed.

"Love... to find true love..." I mumbled to my empty bedroom.

I felt absolutely bereft, even though I finally had the answer I desired and knew which book I needed to grab from the Restricted Section. But all I really wanted at that moment was to return to my dream and back to the arms of Severus Snape.

It was already seven-thirty in the morning when my dream woke me up... or I woke myself. Either way, I was awake and needed to get to the library. I quickly got myself ready for the day and hustled up to the fourth floor.

Madam Pince just so happened to be unlocking the doors as I rounded the corner.

Thank, Merlin! I thought as relief washed over me. I don't think I could handle waiting for her to show up.

"Good morning, Irma," I said cheerfully as I entered the library.

"Getting an early start this morning, Professor?" she asked conversationally, although I could detect a hint of irritation in her tone.

Is that woman ever going to retire? Sometimes I think she's going to end up like Binns... I thought before I responded.

"Indeed, I am. Will most likely need to check something out also; I shouldn't be long."

I briskly walked to the Restricted Section, my fingers itching to find the book.

"I swear I'm going to have the contents of this one shelf memorized with the amount of times I've stood in front of it..." I grumbled as I began reading spine after spine once more.

Finally, I found it. I grasped the spine of the book and held it reverently as I read the title from the front cover.

"Mastering Love: Attain and maintain the object of your desires. Not exactly the kind of book I can picture Severus Snape reading from, but this has got to be it."

I cracked open the back cover and skimmed the Appendix, and there it was.

"Juliet's Curse, page 89."

I flipped directly to the indicated page and read. When I had finished the entry on the curse, I snapped the book closed and uttered the first thing that came to mind, "Oh, shite."

I quickly made my way back through the library to check out the book. Madam Pince shot me a speculative look when she read the title, but didn't comment. I scooped the book up and began my trek back down to the dungeons.

When I reached the entrance hall, I came face to face with Professor McGonagall. From the look on her face, I could tell that she was not very pleased with me. I adjusted the way I was holding the book so that the title wouldn't be legible.

"Good morning, Headmistress," I said cordially.

"Good morning, Professor. Will you be joining us in the Great Hall today?"

Shite. I didn't eat in the Great Hall at all yesterday... I really should just go now and get it out of the way.

"Yes, I will be. My apologies for missing yesterday... "

She leaned in close to me and quietly said, "I understand this is a lot to get used to, Hermione. But I need you to make an appearance at least once a day. It's simply good practice for the students to see you eating with them."

"I understand, Minerva. It won't happen again," I responded.

She nodded in return, and we walked side by side into the Great Hall.

Throughout my breakfast it felt as though the book was burning a hole in my lap. I was so irritated sitting there, mechanically eating my meal, knowing I had better things to do.

I also knew that Minerva let the issue drop easily enough, but that if I tried to get up too quickly, she might say something to me. Especially since it was a Sunday and I didn't have any classes to teach.

I waited until the Headmistress exited the hall to make my escape. As gracefully as I could manage, I stood and slipped out through the staff entrance and headed straight for the dungeons.

When I was finally sequestered in my quarters, I gathered a few necessary items and sat on the floor behind my coffee table. I spread everything out on the surface in preparation for my impending research session.

I opened Mastering Love and re-read the entry on Juliet's Curse.

Juliet's Curse:

Juliet's Curse is said to be first invented in the late sixteenth century. Little is known about the nature of the curse. It is assured that the cursed person will appear dead, but would essentially be held in stasis until their true love is available to release them.

At this time, the definition of true love is unclear. It may mean any person who loves the cursed one in the arcane meaning of love...an unconditional love...or it could possibly refer to the phenomenon commonly known as "soulmate," which, essentially, comes down to the same. It is also unknown whether physical contact is required to break the enchantment. There has been some posturing that the "true love" could simply be within a certain radius of the afflicted and that would be enough to awake them. After all, unconditional love is known to cross the barriers of time as well as space, so the common sense conclusion might well be that neither time nor space matter. There have been no volunteers to test this theory.

Administration of Juliet's Curse can be carried out in two forms. One option is an instantaneous direct spell that can be cast on someone or upon oneself. The second option comes in the form of a time-release potion. The potion form of this curse is said to be created from a mixture of several potions, including the Draught of Living Death. Once the base has been created, the physical curse is to be cast into the cauldron where it would be absorbed by the potion.

Once consumed, the curse wouldn't take effect until the drinker is on the verge of unnatural physical death. The curse would then catch the soul, holding it in a safety net of sorts and binding it to this mortal plane. The enchantment would also heal the physical wounds inflicted to bring about its activation.

Several sources state that the afflicted will never age, and thus never die. Information regarding the mental state of the victim has been deficient. Faerie Curses states that Baron Akerfeldt from Stockholm was cursed in 1768, then successfully reanimated twenty years later.

"There's obviously more information available on this curse and its history. This doesn't even give the incantation or how to brew the actual potion! The only thing this book is telling me is that the curse exists and that you need to be either a "true love" or a "soulmate" to break the enchantment... which isn't really helping me at all!" I exclaimed.

Frustrated, I reached for Severus' journal and pushed away from the coffee table. I rested my back against the sofa and began flipping through pages. When I found where I had left off, I began reading once more.

30 Jan 1995

Today is your birthday... I performed my typical duty of placing roses on your grave. Every time I have to go to Godric's Hollow, I die a little inside. I know you would never encourage these graveside vigils, but it's just something I need to do. While I was standing there, I remembered the year you turned eleven and how brilliant your smile was when you waved your Hogwarts letter at me. It is memories like these that keep me going and yet torture me at the same time.

My memories of you will be the only thing I'll need...

"But he purged all his memories of Lily in the shack. What does that mean? What is his mental state going to be like if I do find him?"

I touched my fingertips to the spiky scrawl that filled the page and traced the heart-breaking words written there.

"I wonder if he even remembers her now..." I said quietly.

Did she even know how much he loved her? How absolutely devoted he was... Oh, to only have that kind of affection directed solely at me... It makes me so irritated. He deserved better, in all aspects of his life, especially this one.

I felt so lost and confused. I had begun this mission to find him and bring him back but in that moment started to second guess myself.

"What if he's happy now? Will he hate me for dragging him back to this cold and cruel reality?" I wondered aloud.

But what if he's alone in his mind? Stuck in a state of perpetual isolation... with no hope, no connections. Or maybe he's got all his other memories, just not the ones of Lily. Does that mean his new reality is devoid of anything good? This life was nothing but one traumatic event after another for him.

I guess there's only one way to find out... I'll deal with the consequences then...

A/N: As always thanks go to the alpha team of awesomeness for helping me stay on track.

Thanks, as always, to karelia for agreeing to beta this for me. I also need to thank her for helping me with the actual wording of the textbook entry, which appeared in this chapter.

Thanks to janus, slytherinlaurel, ApollinaV, and other members of my g-chat f-list whom I am unable to remember at this time, for assisting me with coming up with interesting book titles. *squishes f-list*

If you're still hanging in and reading my tale, please leave me a note to tell me what you think. I really do appreciate every single review.

Much Love ~ Brena