Chapter 1

Severus had just heard incredibly disturbing news; the Dark Lord's forces were preparing to attack Hogwarts. It had taken years of research, but they had finally found a way to defeat the anti-Apparition wards, something more foolproof than Malfoy's Vanishing Cabinet. He knew he had to slip away and warn the Order; they had long known that Voldemort had a deep interest in Hogwarts, and the ancient magic hidden within its walls, but that magic had been protected behind the wards. Unfortunately, everyone was being watched closely; the Dark Lord did not want to risk word of his plan reaching anyone's ears.

Sound took on a distant quality, the explosions seemed to come from farther and farther away, but he could still see the flashes of spells. Raising his wand to fend off an attack, he could feel the world closing in around him, becoming smaller. The last thing he remembered was darkness enveloping him.

***********

He cried out and fought against the darkness. There was someone trying to strangle him. He thrashed wildly, trying to throw off his attacker.

Aurelia grabbed his wrists and said firmly, "Severus, wake up. You're having a nightmare."

The darkness didn't disappear, but he heard someone talking to him, calling his name. He tried to focus on the voice. "Aurelia?" he asked nervously.

"Yes. Do you remember where you are?" she asked cautiously.

"St. Mungo's," he replied absent-mindedly, as he tried to hold onto the memories from his dream.

She could tell that he was lost in thought. "And where were you?"

"Hogwarts, at the battle," he replied soberly. In his memories, he could see bodies lying in the hallways, parts of the castle damaged or even destroyed.

"Can you tell me what you remember?" she asked softly.

How much could he tell her? How much did she already know? For that matter, was she even alone in the room? No. He couldn't tell her anything until he knew more. He had always been a survivor, and in order to survive, he had to know which side had won. "It's all fuzzy. Nothing distinct. Perhaps if you told me what happened, my memories would become more clear?" he asked hopefully.

She replied sadly, "I would rather not. Anything I tell you might influence your memories. The more clearly you remember the events leading up to your collapse, the better opportunity I have of helping you."

He knew she was right. Her accounting of the events might create false memories. "Can you at least tell me who won?"

She considered his question for a few moments before replying, "Voldemort was vanquished."

"Truly destroyed or merely driven away again?" He had to know.

"He is no more. Don't ask me any more than that. In time, you will learn the whole truth. If you remember something, anything, no matter how trivial, let me know. The smallest detail could be a clue."

She had a very trusting voice. He only wished he could remember something about her. She claimed she was trying to help him. For that matter, how did he know she had told the truth? What if the Dark Lord had won, suspected him of being a traitor, and was trying to prove it? If only he had his sight. Then he could use Legilimency to determine the truth of her words. "I will," he replied in a calm voice.

"There is always a Healer in the ward. Call out if you need anything. I'll be back later to ask you some questions and, if you feel up to it, I'd like to see if you could take a short walk around the ward. Healer Brock will be by with your lunch shortly." She gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

He held her hand tight when she started to pull away. "What time is it?" He had thought it was late at night when he first woke.

"It's shortly after one o'clock in the afternoon on the seventh of May. You woke around eight this morning. Is there any improvement in your vision? Perhaps starting to see some grey?" she asked optimistically.

He shook his head. "No. It's still completely black, there is no pain, and no headaches." He knew enough about poisons to know this was the sort of information she needed.

He could hear the confusion in her voice as she replied, "That's odd. Well, if you remember anything else, let me know."

***********

He thought his first walk around the ward had not gone well. He was resigned to using a walker and found he could only take a few steps at a time without having to pause and rest. Aurelia seemed quite pleased that he was able to do this. He hated feeling helpless, and this was the most helpless he had ever felt. He couldn't see, couldn't walk and had no wand.

"Good, very good," she said cheerfully as she helped him back into his bed. Once he was seated, she placed a cup in his hands. "Drink, it'll make you feel better."

He thought he was getting water. Involuntarily, he grimaced at the bitter taste. "What is this?"

"Come now. Severus Snape, Potions master, has no idea what that is?" she teased.

He thought he could hear the smile in her voice. "Restorative Draught?" he asked cautiously.

"Very good. It will help you get your strength back more quickly. Once you're stronger, I can experiment some more."

"Experiment?" he asked nervously. All he could think of were some of the experiments he had done for the Dark Lord.

She gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. "Nothing bad. I've had some ideas for potions that might help you, but you're still too weak. Now, get some rest."

He marveled at the idiocy of that statement. What else was he going to do? He couldn't see, which meant he couldn't safely go anywhere, even if he could walk more than a few steps. He thought he knew where the door to the ward was, but that didn't do him any good. "You were in Slytherin," he announced as he started to remember her.

"I told you that already," she replied.

"No, you merely stated we were classmates." If he recalled correctly, she had black hair and pale blue eyes. He already knew she was tall from when she had walked around the ward with him. She had been the one Slytherin of his year who might be his intellectual equal. For this reason, he had thought of befriending her, but he had been too intimidated by her beauty. Because of her beauty and intelligence, she had been very popular. Of course, her 'friends' were interested in her only because she had helped them earn passing marks. He had known that he was ugly, and she would reject him, so he had admired her from afar. Obviously, she was married since she had gone by Aurelia Carter during school.

Like his other classmates who had not become Death Eaters, he had no idea what happened to her after graduation. He was surprised to learn that she had become a Healer; it was a very un-Slytherin profession.

"So, you remember who I am? That's a good sign. Hopefully, you'll find more of your memories returning." She still hoped that he could provide her with more information about the early symptoms of the poison; that would help her isolate and neutralize it.

"Hopefully," he replied. Already, he had constructed a fairly good memory of the battle. He just wasn't quite ready to tell her about it.

***********

After four days of therapy, he was feeling quite a bit better. She was still making him use the walker, much to his dismay. "I no longer need this infernal device," he growled.

She was pleased that he seemed more like his normal self. She laughed softly. "Humor me. I'd hate to see you lose your balance and fall."

"You expect me to believe a witch of your caliber could not catch me before I hit the floor?" he asked sarcastically.

"Keep treating me like you do and I may not want to," she teased. Stopping him, she appraised his condition. "Perhaps you are ready for something more than walking around the ward."

"Where others can see me?" he asked uneasily.

"Ah, yes, I'd forgotten, you don't like to show weakness. All right, take my arm." She looped her arm in his and led him clear of the walker. "Now then, we'll take it nice and slow."

As she led him out the door and down the hallway, he asked, "Why is the Healer-in-Charge spending so much time with me?"

"Because none of the other Healers have the kind of experience necessary to help you recover. The more time I spend with you, the more I learn about your symptoms."

"You are young to be the Healer-in-Charge, aren't you?" He still wasn't entirely sure he was being told the truth. His suspicious nature had kept him alive this long, and he wasn't about to let down his defenses.

"Well, this is a relatively new appointment," she replied sadly. Her predecessor had been killed only months before, a victim of the war. "Besides, weren't you quite young to be appointed Potions master at Hogwarts?"

"Point taken," he replied. He could tell from her tone of voice that this was not something she really wanted to discuss. "Why St. Mungo's?"

"Why not? I didn't want to work for the Ministry, and none of the more prominent Potions masters were taking apprentices. I didn't want to work for someone of lesser skill, so I applied here. How are you feeling?" She normally didn't answer that sort of question from her patients. Of course, none of them had ever asked.

"Reasonably well, though I think I would like to return to the ward." He still found it disconcerting to walk around without seeing.

"Good. I think I can try some potions out on you now. I'll bring the first one by after lunch. I don't want you taking it on an empty stomach."

"Will you tell me what it is?"

"Perhaps. Though it may be best if you don't know. I'm not used to having a patient as knowledgeable as you. But don't worry, if I haven't poisoned you yet, I probably won't."

"Probably?" he asked.

She grinned slyly, knowing that he couldn't see her. "It all depends on how agreeable a patient you continue to be."

"You wouldn't?" he asked incredulously.

"You never know. Here we are. I'll be back after lunch."

He was reasonably certain that she was joking with him.

***********

Severus was sulking. He had been awake more than a week, and his sight had still not returned. None of the nine potions he had tried had helped. While she would not tell him what was in a particular potion before he took it, once she had assessed its effectiveness, she would generally tell him what he had drunk. She had even solicited his input. What he really wanted to do was go into the lab and work on the antidote himself, but he knew that was not possible without his sight.

The one bright spot in his day was that the interrogation the head of Spell Damage had given him was over. In that esteemed Healer's opinion, his blindness was not a result of a hex or jinx. Unfortunately, that was very perplexing. Aurelia said she could find no trace of the poison in his body. And he did have to admit that other than the blindness, he felt healthy; his strength had returned, and he was no longer exhausted from walking around the ward.

Without his sight, his hearing had become more attuned, and he heard Aurelia approaching; she had a very distinctive gait. "What foul potion are you going to give me now?" he asked derisively.

"None. Are you sure you don't remember any way that you might have been poisoned?"

He could hear a sense of urgency in her voice that he had never heard before. "I've already told you I don't." He still could not bring himself to fully trust her, not until she told him more about the end of the war.

"Without any more information, there's nothing more I can do." She paused, wondering how to continue. She was almost positive that Severus was every bit the loner he had been as a student, especially since no one had come to visit him in the last month, and he didn't seem at all surprised by that fact. "Do you have somewhere you can go?"

"Whatever do you mean?" he asked.

"There is no reason to keep you here. The poison has been purged from your system, and you aren't suffering from spell damage..."

He interrupted and said tersely, "Are you insane? I can't see!"

"Severus, calm down. Loss of sight is not a debilitating injury that requires hospitalization." She had expected him to take the news of his discharge poorly.

"Not debilitating? Could you do your job without your sight?" he snapped.

She was used to delivering life-changing information to people. "Severus, calm down and listen to me. And I mean really listen," she lectured. She watched him cross his arms petulantly. "Yes, your life has changed. I have not given up hope. I am continuing to research blindness brought on by poisons, and I hope to find a cure. In the interim, you will be assigned a caseworker that will help you adjust to your blindness and find a suitable occupation."

"You have not given up?" He had assumed from her tone of voice that she was done with him.

She took his hand in hers. "No, I would never abandon one of my classmates. I like mysteries every bit as much as you do. Now, do you have someplace to stay?"

"Yes." It wasn't much of a house, but it had been unscathed when he last saw it. He still couldn't believe he was being abandoned in such a manner.

"All right. I'll let your caseworker know. Whenever I have any new potions to test, I'll come by." She gave his hand one last squeeze. "You'll be fine."

***********

Severus had been home a week, one miserable week. Today was his first day on his own, and it had already been a dismal failure. He had given up on shaving after cutting himself three times. He could only imagine what he must look like. Making tea had not gone much better than shaving. He had burned his hand on the water. None of this would have happened had his caseworker taken him to get a new wand like he had asked. It seemed that his had been destroyed in the battle.

He was not looking forward to making lunch. His caseworker would be coming by at dinner, and while he had been given a magical mirror to summon aid, he was too proud to admit he couldn't handle living on his own. As he tripped over an offending piece of furniture, he wished he had a wand so he could have the satisfaction of blowing it to bits.

When there was a knock at the door, he shouted, "GO AWAY!" He didn't want anyone to see him like this.

"Severus? Are you all right?" asked Aurelia.

"Come in," he called as he leaned back on the sofa. He supposed he could tolerate her presence. Perhaps she had a new potion?

"How are you feeling?" she asked so that he could tell where she was. She noticed that he had attempted to shave and frowned.

"Like an invalid. What did you expect?" he replied bitterly.

She had seen this before. Sitting beside him, she said. "It will get better. It will just take time for you to adjust."

"I don't want to adjust. I want my fucking sight back," he snapped. "Unless you have a potion for me, just go away."

She could tell that he definitely wasn't adjusting well to his new situation. "Actually, I came to bounce some theories off you." She could see him perk up at the possibility of being useful. "If you wouldn't mind coming with me, I have a small laboratory at my place so I can test new theories right away." Actually, she had talked with the caseworker and learned that Severus shouldn't be living alone. As a fellow Slytherin, she was probably the closest thing he had to family, even though they hadn't been close in school. She also knew he was too proud to accept her charity, so she decided to disguise it as an opportunity to do something productive.

"That is an acceptable arrangement," he replied.

"Good. Where is your bedroom?"

"My bedroom?" he asked cautiously.

"I'll pack some clothes for you. Just in case you have to stay overnight. We have no idea what sort of side effects any of the potions might have." She was actually planning on packing most of his clothes and toiletries, but he didn't need to know that.

"Of course. And your family won't mind you bringing me home?" When she didn't immediately respond, he asked, "Have I said something wrong?"

She wiped the tears from her cheeks, thankful he couldn't see her. "No. My children are at Beauxbatons."

"And your husband?" he asked cautiously.

Right now, she was most definitely glad that he couldn't see her. "Henry was an Auror..." she had to stop as her grief threatened to take control.

He realized her husband must have been killed in the war. Many Aurors had died. "I apologize for being inconsiderate."

She blew her nose on her handkerchief. "No, it's all right. I have to learn how to talk about it. He fell two months ago. We lost a lot of good people. I'll go pack some stuff for you."

He pointed to the far wall. "There is a hidden staircase behind the bookshelf. First door on the right." He realized they were more alike than he had thought. She was burying herself in her work, trying to hide her pain, something he was all too familiar with. He would have done the same in her position.

***********

After working together for three days, Severus had learned some more information about the outcome of the war. She had told him that the students had been evacuated. Minerva and Filius, along with that dubious student organization Dumbledore's Army, had fought against the Death Eaters, buying time for the escape and for reinforcements to arrive. She was reluctant to say any more and refused to say anything when he asked about casualties.

"I have been having memories about the night of the attack," he announced over dinner.

"That's great. What do you remember?" she asked anxiously.

"I was working as a spy, as you probably know." He assumed this was the case since he was not under arrest. Obviously, while he was in his coma, someone testified on his behalf that he had followed Dumbledore's orders. "The night of the attack, I was with the Death Eaters. Before we attacked, the Dark Lord briefed us that he had found a way to defeat the anti-Apparition ward at Hogwarts. Before the attack, we all drank from a ceremonial chalice."

She interrupted, "Wait? You all drank from a chalice?"

"Yes. Is that significant?" He had seen nothing wrong with it at the time since everyone was drinking from it, and it was unlikely the Dark Lord would poison his most loyal followers.

She thought a few moments. "It might be. How much do you remember before your collapse?"

Now that he had begun his recounting of events, he felt more confident to continue. "I was able to get away a few minutes before the start of the attack. During the attack, I hid in the shadows and did what I could to slow the Death Eaters without revealing myself." He had dreaded revealing that information. He knew there would always be those that continued to question his loyalty, and that would only feed that fire. There was no one to report on which side of the battle he had fought. "As I attacked, I could feel my strength failing until I eventually collapsed." He finally started to make the connection. "The poison... It was something to ensure loyalty, wasn't it?"

She exclaimed triumphantly, "Yes! Now we have a starting point. Do you have any experience with this sort of poison?"

"Unfortunately no. And it disturbs me greatly. It shows the Dark Lord did not trust me." At least he thought he was the intended target, though it was possible it was the Dark Lord trying to ensure that his followers did not desert him again. He wondered who the Dark Lord would have found to brew this poison. It was obviously very old and very obscure if he had not heard about it.

She reached out and squeezed his hand. "Well, it doesn't matter now. He's gone. This will give me a starting point in my research."

"I wish I could help." He inwardly cursed himself for his stupidity and his weakness.

"I might be able to help with that. I know a spell that will read books aloud. My grandmother went blind and refused to see a Healer. She used this little spell all the time."

"There is only one problem with that, I no longer have a wand," he replied sullenly.

"Well then, we'll have to go on a shopping trip. Then, while I'm at work, you can go through some of my books." She smiled when she saw the change in his expression. For Severus, he looked downright ecstatic. "We'll go tomorrow since I have the day off."

A/N: I know, I'm abusing the Potions master. And for that matter, I am aware that he wasn't the Potions master when he left Hogwarts, but he held that position for so long, I can see Aurelia using that to tease him. This story was initially started before HBP came out and there was some minor reworking needed to keep it HBP compliant.

As always, feedback is appreciated.