And Subtle Science...

Summary: Two times two cats = doesn't bode well for Severus's sanity or Hermione's permanent record. Demetrios, however, takes Severus's imperatives in stride. Float. Whichever.

A/N: My humble thanks to my alpha and beta readers for this chapter: Anastasia, Indigofeathers, and Mia Madwyn. They saved me from many a splendid pratfall. Annie, Karelia, and Machshefa have time off for good behavior; Melenka - well, I bothered her too much already today. *blows kiss*

24: And Subtle Science...

Hermione wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, stuffed her notes into her bag and followed, with Crookshanks padding silently behind.

-----

As Professor Binns droned on about the discovery of the magical properties of dandelion seeds, Hermione stifled a yawn.

Her hand kept taking notes – which had been more or less automatic long before fourth year anyway – and she peered at her classmates through her eyelashes.

Parvati was examining her manicure beneath her desk.

Lavender was doodling hearts on her parchment – hearts containing her initials paired with that of every boy in their year. Every so often she'd tap the parchment with her wand to set the charm going which would foretell future happiness. Thus far, Hermione noted in a bemused corner of her mind, her best prospect seemed to be Vincent Crabbe.

Harry's head was on his hand as he pored over a Quidditch magazine in his lap, his other hand making vague writing-like gestures with which he would successfully hoodwink Binns throughout his years at school.

Ron's head was tilted back as he stared out the window, his mouth slightly open.

We're all so young... so very, very young... she mused.

Then, Well, of course we are. Focus, Granger.

Trouble was, there was nothing to focus on. Even Crookshanks's thoughts were narrowed to one item: "Want Hermny bak."

Her hand still moving, her mind skittered around every possible reason she could imagine for her having ended up in fourth year, but none satisfied. She kept coming back to Mimi. Who could tell what, if anything, had been in her fuzzy little mind when she swatted the coin?

Hermione stifled a very adult sigh and reached for a fresh piece of parchment.

Why fourth year? What in Merlin's name can Mimi have to do with fourth year?

Giving up on note-taking – which the sweeping forces of history were happy to let her do – she decided to start a list:

Cedric

She closed her eyes. No. There was no point in making a list. What would happen would happen.

Crookshanks shifted on her foot.

---

Keeping part of his awareness tuned to the living room where Hermione's still immobile form now rested on the lounge, Severus examined the potion for the first sparks that would mark the completion of this particular brewing cycle.

If the ingredients had been sufficiently pure, the sparks should start in one... two... three... Ah.

A cadence of small sparks arose from the potion's depths and hovered delicately over its surface.

He rested the stirring rod on a lump of perfectly clear glass and stood straight, glancing down his nose at the kitten.

She was industriously washing her tail.

"You do not float."

She spared him an unperturbed glance and went back to her bath.

"You're clean enough. Come." He bent and scooped her with both hands onto Hermione's kitchen table.

"Now," he said, reaching for the box of Typo-Bits and scattering a handful in front of Mimi. "Let's try this again."

Mimi sniffed a piece of cereal and opened her mouth to taste it.

"No," Severus said, moving it out of reach. "Where is Hermione?"

Mimi hopped off the table and trotted through the archway.

Severus pursed his lips and retrieved her.

Placing her back on the table, he tried again. "When is Hermione?"

The letters zoomed around the table-top. "N-A-O-W."

He snorted. "Let us do skip the obvious. Where and when did you send her..." he hesitated. "... her spirit?"

The letters moved more slowly this time. Finally, he read, "SPIRRIT AT HOGWRTZ."

"Hogwarts," he repeated.

Mimi looked at him as if asking a question.

Feeling quite the fool, but having no better plan, he pulled out a chair and drew it briskly to the table. "Can you narrow down which year for me, little one?"

Mimi made a low noise that might have been a growl.

"4F YEER. DAY 2. FURST CLAS: STOREE OF MAJIK."

He blinked rapidly as Mimi, her tail twitching, batted the cereal around the table.

He hadn't expected anything nearly that specific.

"Why?"

"Meee?"

"Why did you toss the bloody owl?"

Mimi trapped the moving cereal beneath her paw. "OWL BURD. KITTEH HUNT."

Severus scowled. "The coin." Dratted librarian's contagious. From between clenched teeth, he muttered, "The coin, kitten. The coin."

The letters did not move.

Severus picked Mimi up and carried her to the lounge, aiming her face at the coin that remained in Hermione's hand.

"That coin."

He heard the cereal move.

"Meee," Mimi complained as Severus carried her back to the kitchen.

The cereal read, "WHY?"

"That's my question."

"MEEE?"

"WHY?" the cereal repeated.

Severus snapped, "Why what?"

"MEEE!" Mimi yowled, twisting into Severus's grasp and raking her claws across his hand as she leapt to the table top, sending the loose cereal scattering to the floor.

She turned on the cereal box and swatted it, claws extended, toppling it to its side.

More cereal rained down.

Severus closed his eyes and sighed then bent to retrieve the cereal.

Then he froze.

"WHY SPIRRIT CRY? WHER HERMNY? WHO IZ MIMI?"

Severus backed away from the cereal slowly. What in Merlin's name...

His glance fell to the table-top.

"WHO IZ CRUKSHANX?"

He didn't realize he was still backing up until the edge of the counter caught him on the rear.

---

"Rrrrrr," Crookshanks growled at her feet.

Automatically, Hermione reached her hand down to stroke him, but it had the opposite effect.

"RRRRR!" he growled.

Professor Binns stopped mid-sentence, peering hazily toward Hermione. "Miss Evans..."

"Granger, Sir," Hermione corrected him quietly.

"Well, yes, whoever you are, if you cannot keep your familiar under control, it will have to leave my classroom."

"RRRRRR!" Crookshanks repeated.

Grateful for any excuse to leave, Hermione collected her things. "I'm sorry, sir."

Ignoring the envious glances from her classmates, Hermione and Crookshanks left the classroom and headed as quickly as she could for Gryffindor tower.

As she waited for the stairs, she heard a voice from the floor below. "Hey, Hermione – heading to the library? Wait up; I'll walk with you."

Hermione stopped, her throat closing. Do not look down, do not, do not...

She couldn't help herself.

Cedric Diggory was bounding up the stairs two at a time. "Hey." He smiled. "Aren't you usually in class right now?"

"Hi, Cedric," she whispered, her throat too dry for voice.

"You okay?"

Not trusting words, she nodded.

"Binns kick you out 'cause of your familiar?"

She nodded again.

Cedric laughed. "Aw, cheer up. That happens to me all the time. He hates cats."

"Kneazle," she murmured, trying to look away.

"As if Binns knows the difference. C'mon... might as well make good use of time, right?"

Assaulted by memories of his lifeless body... Harry's terror... his father's anguished cry... Hermione could only stammer, "Time..."

Cedric tilted his head as he laughed. "I always bring Clementine to Binns's class if I need an extra hour." He tapped his head with one finger, his eyes warm with humor. "I bet I know what you're thinking."

Unable to speak, she shook her head weakly.

"'So clever - why isn't he in Ravenclaw?' That's it, isn't it?" He grinned at her. "I get that all the time. But nah... someone has to take care of my House, right? Why not me?"

---

In the recesses of the Archive, Demetrios hummed distractedly to himself, contemplating the two file boxes that had fallen off the Hogwarts shelves a few hours before.

He hadn't had to look at their labels to know which two they were. No, that much had been obvious; besides, he'd thoroughly scrutinized the contents of one of them several years before.

The box labeled, Snape, Severus (Potions Master [Potter Years]) was, for the moment, quiescent.

The box labeled, Granger, Hermione (Student) was quiet as well, but he rather suspected that any time now...

"'I could feel at the time...' Any time, now... 'There was no way of knowing...'"

The box quivered slightly.

He stopped singing and peeked inside. "Excellent, excellent." A new file had appeared in the box: "Fourth Year (x2): Minor Infractions." He pulled out a single slip of paper and read, "Dismissed from class: inappropriate familiar management."

He sniffed. "Binns – of course – what a prig. Ah, my dear Hermione, how times have changed since my student days... and yours, of course... how much, though... how much... Hmmm... fourth year, you say..."

He floated, still humming, toward the Floo.

"Hermione Granger, if you would be so kind," he told it.

"Dr. Granger is in her flat. One moment please..."

"Thank you."

After a moment, Demetrios heard footsteps. "Severus, my boy, are you there?"

The flames flickered curtly. "Where else would I be?"

"Quite, quite... I've just ascertained Hermione's whenabouts."

"Fourth year."

Demetrios bobbed slightly. "How did you know?"

"The cereal seems somewhat promiscuous."

"I'm sorry?"

"Initial consideration of the matter seems to indicate that somehow your ruddy toy opened a connection between Mimi and that cat of hers."

"The venerable Crookshanks?"

"Somewhat less than venerable, I believe."

Demetrios shot toward the ceiling in search of his eyebrows.

"Librarian?"

"But a moment, my boy... my eyebrows, you understand..."

"I do not, of course."

Demetrios located his eyebrows near an air vent. "Ah, there you are." He floated back down. "Shocking, how very shocking. Mimi is somehow hearing Hermione's familiar from the past?"

The flames went flat. "So it would seem, despite an utter lack of logic and reason."

"Tut, tut, Potions Master... there is much that is ineffable, you know."

Silence from the Floo indicated Severus's opinion of "ineffable."

"Eloquent as always, Severus."

"Indeed. One assumes, Librarian, that your own source is somewhat less..." Inarticulate rumbling.

Demetrios laughed. "I have her student file, of course. That young whippersnapper kicked her out of class for inappropriate familiar management."

The flames bristled. "She'd best not bring that beast into my classroom."

Through the Floo, Demetrios heard, "Meee?"

He shook his head. "She may have no choice, Severus. I've no doubt her familiar senses that things are not quite usual with our little Hermione."

"Tell that to me then, not now." The flames shot out of the Floo, straight through Demetrios.

"My dear boy, you simply must relax. Tension will cloud one's judgment so... You must know I cannot tell your past self anything. Hermione has the coin, my boy."

The coals gleamed. "Then she's in for a rough time of it in my class."

"Yes," Demetrios said softly. "I rather suspect she is."

The folder behind him flipped open with an annoyed snap as several more pages appeared in it. As he turned to examine it, he heard, "Buggering hell – I've just assigned her detention."

"So I see... oh... oh, dear." Demetrios laughed quietly as another paper appeared.

"Blast – bloody hell, two detentions."

"Yes, yes; her file just expanded."

Severus was sputtering. "One for not returning to Binns's class – and one for – blast – inappropriate familiar management."

"I'm reading it now."

The flames flickered violently. "Make this stop, Librarian."

"I? Why, I can do nothing, my boy. I do hope you'll go easy on her, Severus."

"I never do."

"I think she knows that."

A brief silence, then, "Buggering memories..."

"Mmm, I can see how they might be a bit of bother..." Demetrios watched the flames speculatively, but they ceased all movement instantly. He smiled. "Hmmm... quite. Just remember, my boy – in the present, I mean – that detention going to be much harder on her than on you."

"As it should be."

Demetrios waited.

A longer silence, then the flames went very still.

"You perceive my point... whatever you devise for her detention won't matter an iota to the good Doctor. All she will care about is that she watched you die when she could have saved you."

The silence brooded, then the flames nodded.

"I'm sorry, Severus."

"What can that blasted cat have been thinking?" His words were sharp, but the flames were quiet.

"I've no idea, of course... we may never know."

"That does not satisfy."

"Well, no..." Demetrios raised his hands helplessly. "I would be happy to check the Bast collection, but Hermione is really the..."

"Do so."

The connection ended.

"... expert... oh, dear." Eyeing the file once more, he tilted his head. "So dolorous, this decade... but perhaps... yes. A change of tempo... just the thing..."

At his gesture, the floor lit up and a mirrored ball appeared, spinning slowly on the ceiling.

Demetrios spun once, struck a sudden pose, and swept into Hermione's office.

---

Nonsensical notes:

~ A.