Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Disclaimer: These aren't my characters. For clarification: Severus = Future Severus. Snape = present day Severus.

When Severus entered Snape's room after his date, he found his doppelganger seated at the desk, staring into a Pensieve. Severus arched an eyebrow at him as the other man looked up at his visitor.

"Place your memories in the Pensieve. I want to see everything," Snape instructed.

"Pardon?"

"I need to see what happened, in case Hermione says something. I need to see your memories."

Severus snorted. "You just want to see what I did to her."

"Naturally..." Snape admitted.

Severus went up to the Pensieve and extracted the memories that he shared with Hermione that evening. "Did you want me to join you?" he asked Snape as he placed the silvery threads into the bowl.

"That won't be necessary," Snape told him before plunging into the Pensieve himself. A few minutes later, he emerged, looking livid.

"You practically made love to her on the dance floor. What about your oath?!"

Severus huffed. "I kept the oath I swore. You never said I couldn't kiss her. I don't know what you expected."

"I expected you to be the gentleman you said you would be. You acted like a hormone driven teenager!"

"Just because you can't be seductive doesn't mean that I can't either!" Severus yelled.

"I suppose you've practiced on some cheap whore!"

Severus' eyes narrowed. "I do not associate with such women... you know that!"

"Then explain yourself! How can I, in two years, turn into that Casanova?" Snape gestured pointedly to the memories still swirling in the Pensieve. "That's not me! I don't even know how to act like that. I wouldn't know the first thing to do to be so provocative."

Severus looked down at the ground. He ground his toe into the floor and frowned. Moving about, he refused to make eye contact with Snape.

"I rdit inabk," he mumbled.

"Enunciation has always been a strongpoint with me. It seems that with all you've gained, you've lost that stringent method."

Severus' cheeks were now red. "I said... I. read. It. In. a. Book."

Snape snorted. "You read it in a book? What book was that? How to Woo Witches?"

Severus looked cross, but he didn't raise his head, nor say a word.

More snorting came from Snape. He began to laugh and bent over in a fit of chuckles. "You did! You read that infernal book to be able to hit on Hermione."

"I didn't hit on her. I... well... I woo'd her."

Snape straightened. Unfortunately, he couldn't keep from bursting into more fits of laughter. "Damn, I've gone soft! I'm a flipping, emotional waste."

Severus' head snapped up, and he glared at Snape. "At least I have won Hermione over. If I had left it to you, we would be waiting until Hogwarts crumbled to the ground before you made a move!"

Snape stopped laughing.

Severus reached into his pocket and extracted a miniaturized book. He waved his wand over it until it returned to its normal size. He handed it to Snape.

"Here," he demanded. "Maybe you can learn something so you can keep her long enough for me to return to my time and enjoy her."

Snape grabbed the book and glowered at Severus. "We are one in the same, are we not? I should have no problem keeping her for you," he answered caustically.

"Look at how you act around her! It's like you're walking on eggshells." Severus took a step closer to Snape. "Look, I know how you feel. I have felt the same way for most of the two years in the future. But I knew that if I were to get Hermione, I would need help." He pointed at the book in Snape's hands. "That book helped. If nothing else, it can help you not to be so nervous around her!"

Snape looked from Severus to the book and back to Severus. His shoulders sagged. "Maybe you're right."

"Severus," Severus said. "I know you, and I know how you think. I know that without the help in that book, I wouldn't know what to say to Hermione. I'm not trying to anger you; I'm trying to help you. Read the book. Give yourself a chance to succeed."

Snape sighed. "I suppose I have no choice. You have spoiled her with your silver tongue."

Severus smirked at him. "I'll leave you to your reading, then." He turned and headed into the bedroom where his transfigured bed awaited him. He thought he heard a muttered 'thank you' as he closed the door behind him.

Snape had spent the entire night reading the book. He was just finishing it as Severus opened the door that next morning. He looked up at his twin and grimaced.

"How did you stand reading this tripe?" he asked.

"It's not Shakespeare, but it teaches you what you need to know," Severus said simply.

"Yes, and includes a bunch of drivel along with it."

Severus chuckled. "Yes. I especially liked the part where it advises to shower her with compliments about every part of her body, including her painted toenails."

Snape laughed out loud. "I read that twice. I couldn't believe it actually said that! Oh, by the way, Hermione, that is a lovely shade of purple on your toes!"

Severus nodded his head. "As you said... drivel." He changed the subject quickly. "I'm famished. Do you mind if I take breakfast today in the Hall?"

Snape shook his head. "No, go ahead. I'm going back to bed. I'll have the house-elves bring me something later."

"I'll set up something with Hermione for you."

Snape nodded to him. Severus gave him a quick nod and left the room.

Hermione had skipped breakfast, much to Severus' dismay. He had hoped to get in some early morning romance, but that was not to be. He only had two days left in this time period. His stomach lurched. What if his younger self blew it? He hadn't a minute to waste. Snape needed all the work he could get! Hurrying back to his room, he burst through the door, sprinted through the front room, and stormed into the bedroom.

"Get up!" he demanded of Snape.

Snape turned his head and looked to Severus groggily. "Mmph?"

"Get up! I will be gone in two days so we must practice."

Snape's eyebrows seemed to become one. "Practice what?"

"Practice your dealing with Hermione, of course! I don't want you screwing things up."

Snape sat up. "A little confidence would go a long way," he muttered.

"Prove yourself, and I will have the utmost confidence in you."

Snape rolled his eyes. "Have I ever told you that you are a giant git?"

"Every time you look in the mirror."

"Then you won't mind me saying it again?"

"I live to hear your insults," Severus drolled.

Snape smirked and got up. "You do realize that I have gotten little sleep? Maybe you could have waited an hour or two before bursting in here?"

"We haven't the time, man! We need to practice. I'll be Hermione, you come on to me."

Snape made some gagging motions. "I beg your pardon?"

"Come on to me! Say something seductive! Don't you know what to say to a girl?"

"Yes, I do, it's what to say to a girl that looks like an old, ugly bat that I'm having a problem with."

"I'm not old, and you know it."

"Despite the long hair, you will never pass as a woman, Severus Snape."

"Have you no imagination?" Severus said as he rolled his eyes.

Snape got within inches of Severus' face. "I've got a great imagination. It's just that I can't get past your ugly mug to begin to use that imagination."

Severus pulled back a couple of feet. "Well, looking at you is no picnic either."

"Why don't you be me, and I'll be Hermione?" Snape asked slyly.

"Because, you dolt, I'm not the one who will spend the next two years building a relationship with her."

Snape's smug look disappeared. "Point taken," he responded sulkily.

"Now, get on with it!" Severus snapped.

"It's hard to get into a romantic mood when you're so terse."

Severus raised an eyebrow at him. Immediately his demeanor softened as he got closer to Snape. "Is this better?" he purred.

Snape blanched. "No, I think I prefer you as the ogre you usually are."

Severus grinned evilly but didn't let off on the sweetness. "Oh, Severus, what should we do tonight? Hmm?" His usual deep baritone had gone up two octaves, and he'd picked up his hands daintily and pulled them in toward his chest. "Maybe we could mark some papers together."

"Umm," Snape said as he backed away slowly. "If that's what you'd like, Hermione."

Severus stood ramrod straight as his fists clenched into tight balls. "No! No! No! That's not the right response! What should you have said?"

Snape thought about it for a minute. "We can do that anytime, Hermione. Let's go see the latest Muggle movie."

"Yes! Use things that you know she enjoys! Perfect!" Severus clapped Snape on the back, causing him to stumble forward. Snape grimaced and turned back to Severus.

"Are we done yet?"

"We've only just begun!" Severus said with excitement. "Okay, we're at the movies... what do you do?"

"I don't know! I've never been to a Muggle movie with a woman before!"

"Think, man! It was all in the book!"

Severus looked down as he thought. "Well, I'm next to her," he mumbled before looking up. "I slowly put my arm around her shoulder."

"Right! Then what?"

"We watch the movie together."

Severus put his head into his hands. "This is useless. I should just go back and accept my fate!"

Snape scowled at him. "Oh, shut up! Give me some credit, all right? I may not be as smooth as you, but we enjoyed ourselves the other evening. She knows I'm not used to this sort of thing. She'll give me a chance."

Severus looked off to the side. "Perhaps you're right. Okay, let's move on. You get back to her place, and she says what a wonderful time she had. What's a good thing to say?"

Snape put his finger to his lips and tapped them. He quickly pointed at Severus. "It was only wonderful for me because you were there."

Severus thought on that. "Good enough," he said. He quickly continued. "She asks you in."

Snape's hand went off to his side. "I go in with her, of course."

"Then what?"

"She'll offer a drink, or we'll get comfortable by the fire. "

"Let's act that out," Severus commanded.

"I will not." Snape said defiantly.

Severus looked back at him curiously.

"Look," Snape said. "You think you have all the answers. I read your stupid book, I can read it again. I'm not going to sit arm in arm with you on the couch. Do you understand me?"

Severus frowned. He walked out of the bedroom and looked to the couch and then back to Snape. An image of the two of them, arm in arm on the couch, flashed through his mind. He had his head on Snape's shoulders, and he was rubbing his chest. The image almost made him gag.

"All right, fine. You'll be okay. We don't need to practice anymore."

Snape sighed in relief. "I knew you'd see reason eventually." He walked out of the bedroom to stand next to Severus.

"Just don't blow it with her, okay?" Severus begged. "I'd hate to get back to my future and find that she won't even look at me because I said too many stupid things to her."

Snape's eyebrow rose. "Yes, and of course, you will never say anything stupid to her in the future, nor will you ever get terse with her, right?"

"By that time, she'll be used to me."

Snape shook his head. "You can't have it both ways. Either you promise not to muck up the future, or I will not go one step further with this relationship."

Severus sat down dejectedly on the couch. "I can't promise you that."

"Then you are a fool. Stop telling me what to do and work on what you have to do."

Severus glowered at his twin. "I was hoping you would do all of the lay work."

Snape smirked. "I plan on it. Nonetheless, you must remain the man I make myself when you get back."

"I already am the man you make yourself."

"I beg to differ," Snape said as he sat beside Severus. "You became this naturally, without doing anything to change yourself. I will be actively improving myself. You may be surprised by the man you find when you return."

"I hadn't thought about that."

"Well, you must. I don't want some internal struggle with myself when you join me in the future."

Severus looked to Snape. They both stared into each other's black eyes. An understanding settled with both of them.

"I will do as you ask," Severus said.

"Good," Snape replied. He stood then. "Now, I'm going back to bed."

In a flash, he had left the front room and closed the door to his bedroom behind him. Severus smirked at his departure.