The Long Way Down
Alley_B467 Reviews | 6.28/10 (467 Ratings, 0 Likes, 450 Favorites )
In a dystopian AU where the Dark Lord triumphs and Severus Snape can claim any reward he wishes as one of the chosen 'Faithful,' all Severus longs for is a life of peaceful seclusion – and an heir. But it seems that he might have to sacrifice one for the other when he petitions the Ministry for a hand-witch to produce a child and is presented with one of his former students.
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About Alley_B
Author
Alley_B
Member Since 2008 | 4 Stories | Favorited by 73 | 6 Reviews Written | 622 Review Responses
Reviews for The Long Way Down
You writing does well to bring a crystal-clear image of events to one's mind (which I'm not sure is such a good thing for me in the case of this particular chapter 
).Also, I feel like I ought to mention that I literally felt my blood run cold at the first mention of a "shock of bright pink" back in chapter 6.Keep writing, it's progressing wonderfully!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you so much for your positive review and encouragement! I'm sorry if I creeped you out with this chapter. I wrote this chapter a while back and I've been dreading posting it, because no matter how hard I tried to make in non-graphic, it still creeped me out, but I needed it to be that way for the sake of the story-line. It's the darkest chapter in this story as far as I'm concerned, and thankfully there isn't another one like it later on. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my story; I'm glad you're enjoying it.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you so much for your positive review and encouragement! I'm sorry if I creeped you out with this chapter. I wrote this chapter a while back and I've been dreading posting it, because no matter how hard I tried to make in non-graphic, it still creeped me out, but I needed it to be that way for the sake of the story-line. It's the darkest chapter in this story as far as I'm concerned, and thankfully there isn't another one like it later on. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my story; I'm glad you're enjoying it.
eep.Still having faith that you'll deliver Hermione and the wizarding world from this awful fate.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thanks for the faith, hun; I'll try not to let you down. :)Thank you for sticking with the story, and for reviewing!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thanks for the faith, hun; I'll try not to let you down. :)Thank you for sticking with the story, and for reviewing!
wow, great couple of chapters. I think i would puke if i had to see that happen too. anyways, i can't wait to read more!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you. I'm glad you didn't puke, but I can empathize with the urge. Next chapter should be up soon.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you. I'm glad you didn't puke, but I can empathize with the urge. Next chapter should be up soon.
This reminds me of 1984 and the three minute hate, or whatever it was called. Very well written and eerily scary.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you. 1984 is another one of my favorites, although I have to admit that I havent' read it in years. Thank you for reading and for your positive review. :)
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you. 1984 is another one of my favorites, although I have to admit that I havent' read it in years. Thank you for reading and for your positive review. :)
Who is hiding in Greyback's pack? Is it Remus?
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Could be, but you'll have to wait until the next chapter to find out for sure. ;)Thank you for reading and reviewing this story.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Could be, but you'll have to wait until the next chapter to find out for sure. ;)Thank you for reading and reviewing this story.
So much pain and anguish... your story is really dark and powerful. It’s incredible the things that in such a situation a person won’t do for survival. Great story, hope to read more soon!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
It is disturbing and sadly realistic. I believe that survival instinct lies at the core of all of us, and when everything else is stripped, it's all that's left. Thank you for reading and reviewing my story; there's more coming soon.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
It is disturbing and sadly realistic. I believe that survival instinct lies at the core of all of us, and when everything else is stripped, it's all that's left. Thank you for reading and reviewing my story; there's more coming soon.
YIKES!!!!! well, Roselyn should have destroyed that vial immediately. I wonder if Severus got her the vial, or if someone else did. she didn't reveal anyone's name as her source, so perhaps she took an Unbreakable Vow? those other witches in the pit - had they been Imperiused into doing what they did? how horrible! well, I'm looking forward to the chapter when Severus and Hermione somehow escape. scary!! 
thanks for updating.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
There's a good reason why Roselyn couldn't destroy the vial; she really didn't have a chance, but that's coming up in a future chapter. And no, the other hand-witches weren't under the Imperius curse, but they really didn't have much of a choice either -- it was her or them. There should be another update soon -- I currently have two chapters that I'm just waiting to get back from my beta, and I'm almost done writing the story. Thank you for reading and for your positive review.
Response from June W (Reviewer)
(crosses fingers and toes for happy ending for Severus and Hermione....) I will try to be brave when it comes to the final chapter!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
There's a good reason why Roselyn couldn't destroy the vial; she really didn't have a chance, but that's coming up in a future chapter. And no, the other hand-witches weren't under the Imperius curse, but they really didn't have much of a choice either -- it was her or them. There should be another update soon -- I currently have two chapters that I'm just waiting to get back from my beta, and I'm almost done writing the story. Thank you for reading and for your positive review.
Response from June W (Reviewer)
(crosses fingers and toes for happy ending for Severus and Hermione....) I will try to be brave when it comes to the final chapter!
That was chilling. But, I doubt Voldemort would have handed out cocoa and biscuits to his detractors. Very interesting perspective, with Hermione and this mix of reactions from the hand-witches.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you for reviewing. It was really important for me to depict the perspectives of different hand-witches because in my head they really run the gamot -- from the completely clueless like Lucius', to the 'obedient' ones that just go along with it, to the ones that are just petrified, to Hermione who trully sees what is happening. I try to portray all the characters as individuals, and not clump them together as all pure-bloods are evil, all hand-witches see themselves as victims, all Muggleborns are good and noble, etc. Anyway, thank you for taking the time to review my story. :)
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you for reviewing. It was really important for me to depict the perspectives of different hand-witches because in my head they really run the gamot -- from the completely clueless like Lucius', to the 'obedient' ones that just go along with it, to the ones that are just petrified, to Hermione who trully sees what is happening. I try to portray all the characters as individuals, and not clump them together as all pure-bloods are evil, all hand-witches see themselves as victims, all Muggleborns are good and noble, etc. Anyway, thank you for taking the time to review my story. :)
Ewwwww I find the pack mentality to be really disturbing. The handmaid fanatic next to Hermione made me shiver almost as much as the "trial". I keep thinnking about what a hell their world is now. Its seems to me that you have 100,000s of words to get to a resolution/happily ever after. Or maybe you will end this story similar to like Atwood did? Ha you wont tell me. I know I'll have to wait and see. Being patient is highly over rated.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
LOL Yes, ewwwww just about covers it!I can tell you that I'm not ended like Atwood ended her novel, although the Epilogue is inspired by The Handmaid's Tale, but with a twist. I understand why Atwood ended her story the way she did, and it was a great ending, but it was very frustrating not knowing what happened. I don't think I could handle all the hate-mail if I did that with this story! hehe No, there will be a resolution, and it's not as far away as you think ;)
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
LOL Yes, ewwwww just about covers it!I can tell you that I'm not ended like Atwood ended her novel, although the Epilogue is inspired by The Handmaid's Tale, but with a twist. I understand why Atwood ended her story the way she did, and it was a great ending, but it was very frustrating not knowing what happened. I don't think I could handle all the hate-mail if I did that with this story! hehe No, there will be a resolution, and it's not as far away as you think ;)
Completely horrible and powerful. Funny thing -- Umbridge's part in the proceedings of your story jogged a memory for me of how repellent I originally found her in canon. She reminded me of something really creepy I couldn't immediately identify, and now I do believe that it might have been the awful, sickly-sweet matrons in Atwood's "Handmaid's Tale." At any rate, Umbridge is the perfect villain for your dark AU, and you depict her so well.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you. I didnt' make the connection right away either, until I started to plan this story, then it clicked -- Umbridge is an Aunt! heheThanks again for your reviews and observations. I really appreciate them. :)
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you. I didnt' make the connection right away either, until I started to plan this story, then it clicked -- Umbridge is an Aunt! heheThanks again for your reviews and observations. I really appreciate them. :)
Good Lord - I was wondering how that scene from "The Handmaid's Tale" would make it into this story.Brilliant story!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
I had to include a version of it in this story, because for me that scene was one of the most riveting and poignant in the book -- it was both frightening and revealing. The next chapters are with my beta, so there should be an update soon. Thank you for sticking with this story, and for all your reviews and encouragement. :)
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
I had to include a version of it in this story, because for me that scene was one of the most riveting and poignant in the book -- it was both frightening and revealing. The next chapters are with my beta, so there should be an update soon. Thank you for sticking with this story, and for all your reviews and encouragement. :)
Oh dear, do they suspect something?
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Hum, they definitely suspect something -- who does and what do they suspect... you'll have to wait just a little bit longer to find out. ;)Thank you for reading and reviewing.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Hum, they definitely suspect something -- who does and what do they suspect... you'll have to wait just a little bit longer to find out. ;)Thank you for reading and reviewing.
what an incredible story. i just have to stay for the ride just to see where we're going! thanks so much
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you so much, and welcome aboard! We are nearing our final destination -- hope you enjoy the ride.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you so much, and welcome aboard! We are nearing our final destination -- hope you enjoy the ride.
Anonymous
Clever Hermione! So she did find her way into, and did find something interesting... what a mystery that all is. Snape acts quite erratic, though, doesn't he?
Author's Response: Hermione is very clever!
I can see how Snape's behavior would seem erratic to the readers, and to Hermione (there's actually a line in a future chapter about how she finds the changes in his behavior 'unnerving').
I guess it doesn't seem erratic to me because I know what he's done, what he is doing, and what's going through his mind, and he's very torn right now. But please let me know if it gets out of hand and he starts to come across as crazy! hehe
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. :)
Alcina vom Steinsberg's response: I suppose that's one of the arts of writing a good story - as author, knowing what's motivating the protagonists, but not letting out too much, and still keeping it interesting and ful of supsense for the reader, instead of irritating or boring him. I like it very much when I'm challenged like this as a reader, it's something one doesn't always find in fanfiction. As a writer, I know how difficult this is ;-).
I will tell when I have the feeling I can't follow any longer, promise! ;-) The next chapter is one really hard to take. Would it have been the frist or a very early chapter, I would have left the fic, as I don't generally like this kind of think and am not into stuff that's so dark. But with everything already written, I have faith that your showing us this scene is merely a tool to lead us readers further into this dark, bad world.
Author's Response:
This story is actually pretty typical of my writing, the difference is that in my old fandom I was an established writer, so people knew what they were getting into when they started reading one of my stories, and because they were familiar with my writing they didn't question my choices and instead trusted me to get them safely to the other side.
But this is my first story for this fandom -- here I'm a nobody -- and this probably isn't the best story to attract new readers because it is very demanding. I'm actually amazed at how many people are reading it! The readers count and amount of positive feedback has long surpassed all my initial expectations, which is great.
Then along comes chapter 10. I appreciate your candor about probably dropping the story if this chapter would have appeared earlier. No one has actually come out and said it, but I wouldn't be surprised to find out I lost a few readers with it.
This is the darkest chapter in this story, and I'm glad to say there isn't another one like it after. If readers can get past it then they are home-free, because ironically things get better from here for the protagonists, but first I needed something big to happen in order to propell the story and the characters forward -- it had to be something so shocking that it couldn't be ignored, or shrugged off, or explained away -- and this was it.
That said, I better hurry up and upload the following chapters before I lose all my readers! LOL
Thanks again for your review and your response -- and for continuing to read a story that has so much potential to blow-up in everyone's faces, including my own. :)
Curious that Hermione freaked out when she realized she had lost her "legacy" from Dumbledore. i guess she must believe in it on some level. I am all sorts of curious to know how Snape will take her pregnancy
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Wow! I'm way behind on answering my reviews. She has been hanging on to that piece of parchment for seven years, so she definitely has to believe in it. Thank you for all your positive and encouraging reviews. :)
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Wow! I'm way behind on answering my reviews. She has been hanging on to that piece of parchment for seven years, so she definitely has to believe in it. Thank you for all your positive and encouraging reviews. :)
You've built up an impressive list of urgent questions ... what Snape is doing for the underground resistance and how Hermione can use it, whether Snape has a plan for getting Hermione out of her trap and what on earth will happen when her pregnancy's revealed? Not surprisingly, I can't wait for the next update.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
I'm behind in responding to the reviews, so you have probably already read the next chapter and know that it ends in one more big question! But answers will come beginning with the following chapter -- I know. Finally! hehe Thank you so much for continuing to read and review my story.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
I'm behind in responding to the reviews, so you have probably already read the next chapter and know that it ends in one more big question! But answers will come beginning with the following chapter -- I know. Finally! hehe Thank you so much for continuing to read and review my story.
Well, that was not the upturn in the story that I was hoping for...Isn't Hermione going to tell Snape she's pregnant? Or does he already know because he made sure she would conceive via some potion or other? I really expected her to try to mitigate her punishment (at least partially) by telling him she's carrying the heir he wanted so much. Unless that whole scenario is just a ruse.... Hmmm... too many confusing thoughts to make a good hypothesis!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Yeah, the upturn is not comming for a while, but it's coming! :)I did consider having Hermione tell Snape about her pregnancy in this chapter, but for some reason it just seemed manipulative to me on her part, (I did write several different scenarios of how and when Hermione would reveal her pregnancy, and some seemed too fluffy for the mood of the story, and others just seemed too manipulative or vindictive on her part, which is not how I see Hermione). Plus, after I thought about it, it would seem to me that revealing her pregnancy wouldn't mitigate her punishment as it was -- he wasn't threatening to harm her physically but to lock her up, and knowning that she is pregnant would in my mind only make him more protective and vigilant of her activities, which would mean less freedom for her, not more. Thank you so much for reading my story and for your thoughtful reviews. :)
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Yeah, the upturn is not comming for a while, but it's coming! :)I did consider having Hermione tell Snape about her pregnancy in this chapter, but for some reason it just seemed manipulative to me on her part, (I did write several different scenarios of how and when Hermione would reveal her pregnancy, and some seemed too fluffy for the mood of the story, and others just seemed too manipulative or vindictive on her part, which is not how I see Hermione). Plus, after I thought about it, it would seem to me that revealing her pregnancy wouldn't mitigate her punishment as it was -- he wasn't threatening to harm her physically but to lock her up, and knowning that she is pregnant would in my mind only make him more protective and vigilant of her activities, which would mean less freedom for her, not more. Thank you so much for reading my story and for your thoughtful reviews. :)
I cannot stay away from this story... it draws me like a moth to a flame. I love the way you write Severus and Hermione, and the up and downs of their growing relationship.I wonder what he will do after he finds that she is carrying his child. I believe he will be very happy to know that he will leave a legacy borne of his seed and Hermione's body. But that's just me... ever the hopeless romantic.Good job, Alley! 
Beth
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Awww, that's so sweet. Personally, I'm an optimistic cynic, but I don't see anything wrong with hopeless romanticism. Thanks again for everything. :)
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Awww, that's so sweet. Personally, I'm an optimistic cynic, but I don't see anything wrong with hopeless romanticism. Thanks again for everything. :)
He won't really keep her locked up for nine months, right?Each chapter seems to bring more and more questions. I can't wait for more!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
I'm not sure whether he would or wouldn't; I guess the real question is can he keep her locked up for that long! ;)Thank you for reading and reviewing.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
I'm not sure whether he would or wouldn't; I guess the real question is can he keep her locked up for that long! ;)Thank you for reading and reviewing.
Wow, this is not the day for easy reading. Does he know she's pregnant? who was coming through the flue? Guess I'll have to be patient, but things will get better for Hermione, right?
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Oh, yeah, things will get better, but they might get worse before they do. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my story.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Oh, yeah, things will get better, but they might get worse before they do. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my story.
Interesting. Look forward to the up date. Not to long i hope.x
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you for your positive comment. I'm behind in responses, so the next chapter has already been posted, but I look forward to reading your review about that one. Thanks again for reading and reviewing.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you for your positive comment. I'm behind in responses, so the next chapter has already been posted, but I look forward to reading your review about that one. Thanks again for reading and reviewing.
Oh bugger, everything seems to go south... On the other hand, my suspicions of Snape's undercover activities have just been confirmed.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Yeahp, it's two step forwards and one step back with these two, but don't worry, we'll get there! :)Thank you for reading and reviewing.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Yeahp, it's two step forwards and one step back with these two, but don't worry, we'll get there! :)Thank you for reading and reviewing.
Hmmm... so he's making potions - assumedly for some of the girls in Hermione's position - but he doens't want her to take one which, to me, means he really did want a wtich to have his child, and wasn't in any way hoping to get Hermione out of her personal hell. I wonder then, if it was Lupin coming through the floo and if it was sheer luck that Snape happened to get a female from the Order as his consort?
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Hum, all very good questions to which you're going to have to wait until you've read the rest of the story before you get the answers! *grin*Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Hum, all very good questions to which you're going to have to wait until you've read the rest of the story before you get the answers! *grin*Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!
I enjoyed your chapter. Boy, Snape was really bent out of shape, I don't blame him. They really don't know each other very well, and he has no reason to believe she wouldn't abort his child. If she was pregnant, I mean. Can't wait to see his reaction when he finds out. Thanks for the update, look forward to the next one. Captivating chapter as always.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you! I think I get a perverse enjoyment from seeying Snape 'bent out of shape.' One thing I've noticed about Snape in the books is that he doesn't lose his cool often, but when he does, oh boy, he snaps all over the place, maybe because he's wound up so tightly all the time. hehe Thank you again for reading and reviewing my story.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you! I think I get a perverse enjoyment from seeying Snape 'bent out of shape.' One thing I've noticed about Snape in the books is that he doesn't lose his cool often, but when he does, oh boy, he snaps all over the place, maybe because he's wound up so tightly all the time. hehe Thank you again for reading and reviewing my story.
Great chapter. I was holding my breath for a while... exciting! Hope to read more soon!
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying this story so far.
Response from Alley_B (Author of The Long Way Down)
Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying this story so far.