Not Sleeping, Not Awake

Not Sleeping, Not Awake

Dressed in red silk and black velvet, the Dark Lord sat comfortably in an oaken chair, nibbling a biscuit. Two elves served him steaming tea, bowing every so often. As Severus and his men stood there, plastered in mud, sweat and blood, their master waved shortly, and the elves busied themselves with erecting a smell-barrier.

Pacing on the safe side of the barrier, their master scrutinised each and every member of his diminished troops. He flexed his spindly, white fingers.

All participants had to report their particular problems in detail. Two reasoned they must have been fighting against the sunlight for too long so that the sun had blinded them. Two others reported feeling sick from sudden heat attacks. So close to the mid-winter solstice, it wasn't a good excuse, even if Severus knew that their master could find the confirmation in their minds. Tripping over a rock they hadn't seen in time was not received any better than being Stunned by Order members. Flint and another three fighters argued they had to retreat into the brushwood to Rennervate the fallen ones without the risk of being Stunned themselves. Severus, remembering that Draco had provided them with laxative drinks in the morning, knew they had had very private reasons to retreat, too.

The stench-block did not in the least bit moderate the effects of the curses the Dark Lord applied to his men.

Draco himself had an excuse no better than the others, and he fared no better either. Severus worried how the boy would make it home and hoped fervently that he had the potions he would need.

As one after the other had nothing more than what he called "insubstantial excuses", the rage of the Dark Lord went beyond reason.

Paul Nott and Sinclair Boston, being the second league in charge, were submitted to Cruciatus and flaming spells that were severe enough to reduce them to bleeding, panting heaps.

The curses their master threw at Severus went beyond measure. He topped the general pain of a Cruciatus up with a knife-cutting curse, and he didn't stop at that. Severus experienced visions of blinding, yellow light, alternating and overlaying with drumming sounds threatening to tear his tympanic membrane and driving his mind to madness. His garments were Banished, and his bare skin was assaulted with aggressive nettle-burning charms made worse by the fact that he was already wriggling and tilting in pain. In its wake, his deathly pale tan changed into a sickly green. Do not fall, Severus repeated to himself. Anything else, just stay upright.

Voldemort finished by throwing two more hexes at the swaying man, whirling his wand dangerously. The first made Severus' hair stand on end, and all over his exposed skin he grew small candle-like lights emitting sparkles that again fell on his already burning skin. Shouting, "Immobili Continui!"...a curse that none of the bystanders had ever heard of...the Dark Lord finally felt his wrath satiated. For several seconds, the curse formed a crimson orb around Severus, drawing up his right foot and pulling the left elbow and lower arm into the orb to surround him completely. Inside the orb, Severus barely succeeded at remaining standing.

"Take the bungler home to his oh-so-caring wife," their master ordered. "My little replacement of a Christmas present keeps him unable to move for a week at least. He will be as able to think straight as his addled mind allows him normally. Mind you not to drop him; he isn't stiff after all." With these words their master left.

The orb slowly dissolved, and Severus collapsed on the hard ground.

:*:*:*:

The chimes at Spinner's End announced two visitors together with the return of the master of the house. Then silence. Surprised at their delay, Ginny carefully peeked out of the kitchen window.

Draco, shivering terribly, kept himself upright just enough to hitch Severus onto his left hip, pulling Severus' arm over his shoulder. A single cloak covered their backs, but in the front, it openly showed Severus' bare body. His face distorted in pain, Draco was close to collapse. With a rush, Ginny opened the door wide and took hold of Severus, who then hung limply at her shoulder. Without hesitation, she led her husband to the bedroom where the blood-smeared body slipped on Draco's coat and fell from her grip, nearly landing on the floor.

Nott hadn't exactly been helpful so far, but he had accompanied Draco for moral support. Now, he jerked forward and caught Severus' shoulder, shrieking in pain himself. Ginny kicked the duvet aside, and they carefully lowered the non-responsive man onto his mattress.

Ginny's training with the Aurors made her quickly close the entrance door and respell the house before she checked on the two weakened escorts. "Draco, sir, oh Merlin! Thank you for your help. What has happened; what should I do?" She again checked on Severus, wincing at the greenish skin with its many blackened marks from his burns. She moved to straighten his leg, but then hesitated to do so. Wheezing miserably, Draco pressed out that Severus was not in immediate danger.

Ginny nodded fearfully, straightened Severus out of his awkward position, and gently stroked strands of lank, filthy hair out of his face. His breathing was shallow, but steady.

Thereafter, she came out to her unexpected guests. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

Indeed, Nott asked for a restorative potion, and Ginny opened their apothec-chest "Of course. Here is a set of Severus' Cruciatus-remedies."

Draco selected what he might not have at home; Nott followed, but he needed explanation for some. "These two are to be massaged in, and this you drink tomorrow night, not now. Phials of Pepper-up are there as well. Here you go."

"Take anything you need," Ginny called out to them from the kitchen where she busied herself with making tea. "I have two sets left for Severus. But he doesn't look to be suffering from the Cruciatus, or at least not only that curse. What has he been submitted to? And why for Merlin's sake?" she asked when she returned with the tea, cups and glasses plus a jug of pumpkin juice diluted with water.

Parched, they helped themselves to the drinks. With carefully selected words, Draco told her what had happened and how the Dark Lord had punished her husband. Ginny was able to read between the lines that Draco and Severus had plotted part of the failure beforehand. Nott didn't interrupt at all, but listened most carefully, so that Ginny restricted her questions to the curses Severus had received.

"As far as I understood, the last curse didn't do anything more than paralyse him," Nott told her, still exhausted and in pain. "For a week or more." Ginny's face went white in shock.

Draco continued, since Nott was too weak to speak. "The typical cures against the Cruciatus should be applied as he is used to. He certainly got his share! A normal painkiller would do for the knives. Do something extra to soothe his skin. He's also been blinded and assaulted by noise."

"Probably it is best if I keep his eyes shut and wet and dim the light. No extra noise, either; maybe a Silencing Charm towards the street?" She was speaking in a lower tone now as she went back to close his eyes, feeling her stomach churn.

Draco nodded weakly. "Send me an owl tomorrow, Ginny." He promised to come around immediately if needed, but at the latest in two days.

Paul Nott felt like promising the same, but Ginny waved him off. "You need to recover first. Feel free to send for more potion, sir." The man departed with silent nods of regret and gratitude.

"Draco," Ginny whispered as he was about to leave. "You had better open the lab for me, too."

Raising an eyebrow, the boy complied, his face contorting in pain as he removed the wards. "Do call for help, Ginny," he insisted as he left.

:*:*:*:

Severus awoke in his bed, hardly remembering how he had ended up there. His left arm was numb from lying on it. The rest of his body felt strangely dull and sore as well, which was disturbing as such, but bearable. He started to roll over, but he found that he could not. He wanted to lick his dry lips, only to notice that this didn't work. He could not even move his eyeballs or open his eyelids. Furrowing his brows in concern... he found that that didn't work either. What is going on here?

Gradually, his memory of their report to their master returned, including the traces of mud and blood, the stench of body juices and fear and the incredible pain he had been in. The thought alone covered him with sweat once again. That was when he noticed that he was clean and lying in a fresh bed. But this was not Hogwarts where the house elves would permanently fuss about him. Severus was at Spinner's End, in front of the window that overlooked the tiny backyard. He must have fallen asleep, because when he pondered more, he had been turned around and was now facing away from the window. It gave his closed, and yet burning eyes a welcome rest, but how had it happened? More flashbacks pulsed in and out, and Severus recalled how she, Ginevra, had cared for him. Of course, she will care for an injured man, he thought. Even if she must be revolted from my looking like a Christmas tree, it would be better to bear when I'm not swimming in my own juices.

Shuffling steps approached his door, which opened slowly. "Hello, Severus. You might be awake; I cannot tell. Look, we have a little bit of decoration here," she said, tenderly opening his eyelids. She directed his gaze to the cloth she had draped over the chest of drawers. There were three candle stumps from his storage, burning without smoke. It looked terribly similar to himself under the Dark Lord's spell. But it also had a warm, homely touch. Mother used to... No, forget that! Ginny lowered her head so that her eyes met his. "I'm glad you're a little less... pale today." She stroked his hair again, and her eyes looked so gentle, as loving as before the wedding. Or, rather, like at the dratted party at the Mulciber's, just before she had snubbed him again. What is she up to this time, exploiting the fact that I'm so completely incapacitated? She's talking all the time, now that I cannot stop her.

"Let's turn you around, shall we? Goodness, I'm rambling. I'm sorry."

Severus thanked the gods that she kept herself quiet for a long time. He would have preferred to follow her movements as she fumbled about his body, but he could not.

She closed his burning eye and after some time carefully opened the other one. "I'm sorry, love, if I'm doing it all wrong. I don't even know if you're awake or not. Now, let's check your skin, shall we?"

We? I cannot stop you, so let's assume you shall. Did you warm that stuff that you intend to smear all over my skin?

She applied the skin ointment once again, carefully covering every part of his skin, with no exception. Her hands on his body felt soothing and... good. No, actually... exquisite. Severus felt like closing his eyes and exhaling deeply and cursed himself again for not having control over himself. Instead, he was damned to look where she dictated, which was her face. She worked slowly, very slowly. He could hear her humming a tune. Does she enjoy this? She betrayed me; she mocked me; I'm not falling into this trap again! She's enjoying herself at my cost.

Ginny used a folded piece of tissue to moisten and grease his dried lips with yet another ointment. Severus wondered if they had also turned green or if they sported blotches or blisters. From what he could feel, they were no different than usual, yet she painfully avoided touching them.

Severus felt more tension leave his body under her application until even certain muscles relaxed. It didn't take more than a swish of her wand to remove the puddle and clean him. "I'll move you over to my bed again, will that be all right?" She took a deep breath. Panting, she levitated him there, letting him sink slowly and gently onto her hard mattress, although she could have saved herself much effort by just dropping him. The journey was surprisingly short, and Severus realised that his bed had been repositioned towards the door while the sofa now stood very close to the door on the other side. "Just a moment," she said and stroked his cheek. She tucked him under the covers...a gesture he only remembered from his earliest years at home when his grandmother had still been visiting.

Between his lucid moments, where Severus could analyse what was happening, his mind drifted off again and again, and he spent precious time fighting back to reality. Often his anger about her betrayal ruled. Other memories seared through his mind, leaving a sense of guilt too difficult to overcome. He saw Albus repeating his request to care for any youth that fell into his responsibility. He certainly had ensured Ginevra stayed alive, but that was not what Albus had had in mind, and Severus knew it all too well. Severus had failed to fulfil the most urgent demand his mentor and saviour had pressed upon him.

With swift movements, she had his duvet cleaned. She took something extra out from his mattress as well. A layer of... Severus wasn't sure what, but obviously it had prevented the lower layers from getting soaked. The realisation struck him that she was all too experienced and prepared. "Again", she had said.

At Spinner's End, there had been far too many days where he had lain in his own excrement, and in his memory, cleaning afterwards was one of the worst actions in all his career as a Death Eater or a spy. Now, a sixteen-year-old girl had to do it. Despite her young age, she was even married to him, former head of Slytherin house. Infuriating as well as embarrassing!

In normal circumstances, Severus reminded himself, a young witch like Ginevra would enjoy a spectacular ride on a broomstick or maybe watch a Muggle film in the arms of a shy boyfriend. Severus found he could not stand the image of someone else snogging her, and he hated himself for it.

Like every teacher in Dumbledore's service, Severus had never honestly questioned the elves' responsibility for the cleaning, also in his private rooms, although he had never again treated them the arrogant way he had so quickly adopted as a student. Two years ago, their tasks had once again included the care of his damaged body when he returned to Hogwarts injured or incapacitated after the Dark Lord's calls. Thus, for Severus, Ginevra was now doing the lowest of the elves' jobs.

Ginny used a very long spoon to pry open his mouth for all the liquid food without touching him. By now, she had also learned the swallowing spell perfectly. Instead of plain tea, he got a thin soup today. It was a time consuming task, and she inserted a sentence every few gulps. "... A little stomach aid first; here you are... Yes, it is bitter. Let's neutralise it with juice, not grapefruit, not to worry... You'll have only chicken broth with a little starch to give your stomach something to do... I've added thyme to the broth; you love that, don't you?"

Eventually, she closed his already painfully dry eye, and she didn't open the other one this time. "I truly hope you can taste this, Severus... We'll head for a porridge soon; that will give you more substance." He was asleep before she was finished, but she could not notice it. She continued feeding and making him swallow for a long time, having no other guideline than an educated guess of the need of a male, parched body with damaged digestion.

:*:*:*:

With a shy but friendly, "Good morning, Severus!" she entered his bedroom. She approached him slowly, humming a tune as if not to startle him. But he had been awake for a while, waiting for... something. Dinner, he had thought, but he seemed to have missed it. She touched his upper shoulder tenderly first, but her hand grew bolder quickly.

"Actually, it is not a good morning. It is dreadful outside. It's rainy, stormy and cold. Oh, and it is Monday today, the 29th." A pause. "I'm sorry, but I think I'll keep the window closed." She pushed him gently so that he was on his back. She took hold of his neck and shoulders, circled, rolled and pressed his skin between her hands. Proceeding to his previously lower arm, she declared, "You smell that? I've found a simple jojoba oil and added eucalyptus, silver fir oil, and geranium for the mornings. That should make you feel fresh." She went around the bed to reach his other side. "I didn't use rosemary because I'm not sure if you have epileptic symptoms."

Silently, she continued, massaging his lower arm, hand and chest. "I'm quite sure you're awake now. Let me open your eyes." The first thing he saw was her face. Friendly, warm eyes, speckled brown and blue, her cheeks just a little red as if in excitement and her mouth full and red. But she moved away, and he saw nothing more than the drawers of his cupboard.

They had finished the morning ritual: washing, massage, the replacement for a toilet. This time, Ginny had been prepared for what would happen and when. She had held adequately shaped collecting dishes at the ready. She had purposefully encouraged him to let go at the time she knew he was close, although she didn't know how much he perceived from his surroundings or what he could influence. Severus wished it would be less he had to experience consciously.

:*:*:*:

Heavy steps crashed about in the sitting room, waking Severus from deep sleep.

As promised, Draco had come to check on them. Ginny made him go to the bedroom, announcing happily, but not too loud, "Severus, you've got a visitor." She opened one eye and moved Draco into the line of Severus' view. "Bend down a bit, he cannot move his eyes."

"Is he even lucid?"

"Well, I cannot say for sure, so we will treat him as if he were," Ginny said in a chastising way. "You can help me now to turn him around. He's been on his back until the end of the night, on his right side in the morning, so it is the stomach now. Severus, I know you're not fond of this one, but for half an hour, it will have to be. We'll turn you again then, all right?" she asked.

"Why do you ask him?" Draco snorted.

"A general politeness, Mr Malfoy. You'd want to know before someone grabs you," Ginny commented. "You take his feet," she ordered, not trusting him with the valuable end. She arranged Severus' head most carefully, supporting his forehead to lift it. He didn't get a pillow for his head to prevent it from blocking his nose, but he got a small pillow under one shoulder. "I actually don't know if that is needed, but you see, I don't want his windpipe to be too tilted. Percy always needed this pillow when his back hurt. He almost suffocated with his shoulder flat, so I prefer not taking the risk."

Severus heard Draco express what he himself had just thought. "Amazing what you remember from your family."

"Comes in handy at times like these," she replied, and Severus had the strong feeling of being scrutinised. Eventually, Ginny knelt down and smiled into Severus' open eye. "You need rest, Severus. We will leave you for a while." She gently closed his eyes. Turning, she told Draco, "He still cannot communicate at all. I tried this morning. Nothing! I only hope I'm doing it sufficiently well. Oh, Severus, I hope you know I'm trying."

Draco considered this. "It could be his right foot and left hand that wake up first." He explained about the red orb, and Severus eagerly hung to his words. Yes, the orb had been a bit too small to hold him completely.

Ginny nodded and summarised: "If the spell had to pull those two body parts into its realm, that should have weakened its effect on them."

:*:*:*:

After they left Severus lying on his stomach, Draco followed Ginny into the kitchen. He asked how matters were, but for a long time he got only vague answers on inconsequential household affairs. "Ginny! You know what I mean. What is...or was...going on between you and Severus?"

The direct question hit home. Ginny didn't know where to keep her hands or her eyes. "Nothing," she finally said, her tone as unspecific as the word itself. At Draco's further prodding, she stood and ranted. As if he had put a needle in a balloon, she let out air. In her agitation, Ginny took hold of the back of the chair, clenching it till her knuckles went white. How he didn't talk to her but in commands, how lonely she was.

Draco considered her: now he was getting somewhere. When she took a breath, he inserted, "I still don't understand. Maybe if you told me..."

Taken aback by her own outburst, Ginny collected her thoughts. He still doesn't know? And since when do I confide in a Malfoy? Her strange, private encounter with Dumbledore's portrait had led Ginny to the conclusion that Severus could be trusted, and Severus had made it clear that he trusted Draco. But that went only as far as the operations against their current master were concerned.

Sobered, she declared, "It isn't your place, Draco." She checked the time and was glad for the distraction. "Let's turn Severus round. I've a bad feeling about letting him lie on his belly for too long, even if the skin on his back heals well." They went to the bedroom.

:*:*:*:

Lying awkwardly on his stomach, knowing Draco was in the house, Severus could not rest. He reflected on the morning and what must have happened the days before.

The girl was so considerate and much quieter in her actions than even Draco, whose noble grandfather had never tolerated any racket in the house. Severus hadn't seen her flinch. Even the more revolting aspects of care hadn't disturbed her. Severus was furious that he did not have his elementary body functions under control, and the fact that he depended on her was incredibly humiliating. He felt marginally better that today he had not caused her so much work. She even addressed the issue quite openly.

The day before, she had spent some time just sitting with him. Probably more than he remembered. Certainly for a meal or two he had completely missed. He did not want to admit it to himself, but he liked having her at his bedside. At times, he was ready to forget the humiliation she had caused at the wedding and the distance he insisted on keeping. She certainly didn't keep any now that she was allowed to come close.

Now, Draco was there, and Severus was anxious and... yes, he was jealous. It should be him speaking to her, asking about her day. Oh, but you wouldn't, remember. You would be in your lab, in the forest, upstairs. Anywhere but near to her.

He must have dozed off for a while because they were suddenly back in his room. She caressed his shoulders and neck. Gradually, her strokes and circles became a bit more forceful, made themselves noticed on purpose. Now, her gentle, soft warm hand stroked over his cheek, into his hair, back to his jaw. Her movements became distinct but never harsh. Her voice matched the gesture. "He might be awake now. Severus, we are going to turn you to the left side now." And so they did.

Admittedly, they had less trouble together, but Severus didn't like Draco being there. Not at all.

"I'll be right there," Draco said loudly to Ginny when they were about to leave. Her soft steps faded, but Draco didn't head for the bathroom as Severus had assumed. Instead, he heard Draco's harsh voice from very near. "You might want to listen now, you obstinate git."

Draco cast a spell Severus could not follow and drew the door, but left it slightly ajar. Severus heard his steps head off, but they didn't fade away. The kitchen door opened, and a chair was moved. "Bread and cheese? Now?" he heard Draco ask. Despite the distance, the boy's voice was clear, and other sounds were easily distinguishable, too.

The cutting sound of a knife. "I'm not sure if it is lunch time for you, but I take a meal or a snack whenever I can," she explained.

"Oh, thanks. I'd like some fruit at least. They're from our orchard in France." They were eating in silence for a while before Severus heard Draco again. "How can you stand this life, Ginny?"

"Drop it, Draco, please. Just drop it. It isn't your place, nor your problem."

"Oh, yes, Ginevra Snape, it is. It was me who came up with the idea you should wed. I was under pressure that day, but believe me, I did not want this. This is no life." The bang accompanying Draco's statement rang on in Severus' hypersensitive ears.

A pause. Then Draco started in a most personal tone. "When we brought Severus in the other day, the makeshift bed was made. Ginny, what is the meaning of that?"

For a long time, Severus heard no answer. Then suppressed sobs. A chair was pushed back, then a few steps with Draco's shoes. "Ginny, oh, I'm so sorry. This is your normal bed then?"

Silence for a while. Wasn't there a hole that would swallow Severus? Some flesh-eating monster plant that would digest him whole?

"You're only together when you... uh... make love? Twice a week?"

"We don't make love." Severus heard her beaten voice. What did she mean? He would jump up, if... if he could move. Why would she discuss this with Draco? Because there is nobody else who listens, he berated himself.

Draco must have had the same problem. "No? But you've got that obligation upon you..."

Severus heard her huff in disgust. "That is not making love, Draco!"

She was right, and it was Severus' fault alone. Whatever her reasons, she hardly deserved the treatment he had given her. The truth cut like knives and was harder to bear than a Cruciatus. If his body had allowed it, he would have stormed over, taken her into his arms. No, you would not have gone. Admit it, at least to yourself.

Her voice had been a bit muffled. Possibly she was in Malfoy's arms right now, and with a Malfoy one was never sure. What are they doing there? Will the boy console her or exploit possibilities? I bound him thoroughly with an Unbreakable Vow, but did I cover this unlikely situation?

"Oh, Ginny, I'm so sorry!" Feet shifted on the floor, and Severus felt a pang of jealousy in addition to his self-loathing. Again, it was Draco speaking. "How can you stand this?"

"We've had some good times, you know. I try and remember those."

"He doesn't deserve you! And you certainly don't deserve such a treatment!"

"Stop it, Draco. Please." She was pleading now. "I survive it, and I still hope..." Her voice faltered.

After some pause, Draco asked quietly, shyly, "What is your... eh... schedule, Ginny? I mean when do you have to..."

"Tomorrow night, before ten, if I understand the rule." She appeared surprisingly composed as she replied.

What? Is it true? Oh, I can not. How will that ever work? Damn the mission, Voldemort and his punishments. Severus nearly missed the next words.

She was silent for a while, then asked, "Draco, do you know what happens if we delay it?"

"You don't want to know."

"Tell me!"

"It was the answer Flint gave me after he tried to delay it. Serina, his wife, blanched and trembled in agony at the memory alone. I don't know more." The boy sounded as if he was truly sorry, not a common streak of the Malfoys.

Noises mingled as Severus was not able to concentrate any longer.

When he next was aware of his surroundings, it was lunchtime, and Ginny was telling him how so much better his skin looked. He stayed awake all the afternoon. She went in regularly to turn his non-cooperating body around. Her breath came heavy after each movement, and when she passed by his angle of vision, he found her eyes circled with black rings. How could she sleep deep enough if she set up spells all night to awake and turn him around? And what by Salazar's sea serpent was she planning?

In the evening, she sat at his bed, musing. "I'm not sure if you're bored or stressed. If I read to you quietly and you've got your eyes closed, you can drift away freely." She selected a book of individual stories. "It is worn out, and I've seen you with it already. Seems you like it." And she read with a soft voice, slowly and with smooth intonation. At the end of each passage, she let the words sink in for a short while before she continued with the phrase Severus knew was coming but was most eager to hear from her.

:*:*:*:

Severus must have missed the start of today's morning rituals, for she had already explained the oil she was using. "I'm sorry, Severus, if I repeat myself, but I don't know when you can listen." For most of the morning, she left him alone, eyes closed. Severus had a lot of time for thinking. Too much maybe, for he found that the thwarted attack and other aspects of the Dark Lord's activities did not hold his attention. It inevitably drifted away. It drifted to her, how she nursed him more tenderly and kindly than he might have assumed even a month ago. Certainly not mirroring how he had treated her in the last weeks.

The soups weren't as nourishing as he might have wished, but she delivered them like a menu in a five-star hotel. After another long-lasting lunch, he slept again.

What he next heard were voices outside his room.

"... Ludwig's Lust. I can do it," Severus heard Draco say, adding in a lower voice, "I'm sorry if it sounds like peeping, but I can help... otherwise, whatever you need." Severus wasn't sure if the heat in his face stemmed from a genuine blush or if all his body provided was only the sensation of it. They wouldn't dare!

"No, Draco!" Her voice was determined. "Thank you, but no. I'm certainly able to handle my matrimonial duties without bystanders."

A little more shyly now, Ginny continued. "All right. Then it is tonight. Don't worry, I'm prepared. Besides, Ludwig's Lust is the last thing I'd push Severus through!" Draco must have shown a face as irritated as Severus now felt. "Think, Draco! I cannot possibly manipulate Severus with that dratted potion. He'd lose all his pride. Just imagine: me, a sixteen-year-old chit who doesn't even have her O.W.L.s yet, raping Severus Snape, one of the most powerful and proud wizards in Britain."

Severus wanted to bury his face in his hands in shame. His pride. It had been the start of all this. He couldn't bring himself to ask her. Just ask. But he could not. The frustration over his inability to swallow his pride and ask had made him hate her, misuse her.

Next, he heard Draco again, sounding desperate. "I feel so helpless about your problem with the kiss. If I hadn't come up with such a plan, you wouldn't..."

"No, Draco. Your plan kept me alive. I would be dead had he sent me to those motorbike guys. I might still be alive, but I wouldn't be like I'm now with Greyback either!"

No, but you should have been faring better, so much better with me, Severus' mind provided before he could stop it. According to Draco, the problem is a kiss?

A chair scrapped over the kitchen floor, as if someone had stood up. It sounded very close, so Draco had applied that spell again. "I'm alive, and I can handle it. Eventually, it might get sorted out. I could curse the plump cow, but what could I turn her into that is worse than a pink toad?"

She blames Umbridge? What makes her do so?

"This has to stop, Ginevra Snape! Your miserable git of a husband must be brought to his senses."

"No, Draco." She paused. "Look, I cannot blame him, not absolutely. He was so hurt. Think of it. I believe he really felt something for me. After so many years of isolation, he dared to open up a bit. He had made such an effort, even thought of an engagement when he gave me the pendant. He had arranged all kinds of small things that were beyond fulfilling the promise to keep me alive. They were quite out of his normal behaviour. And then I rebuke him. Worse than a cold shower."

She understood. Not only could she reconstruct his thoughts, but she really got his feelings right. Yes, he had made an effort for her, had thought that for now there was someone for him, even if he could not believe in something permanent.

"... expect Severus to do?" Oh, drat, Severus had missed some part of the conversation. Their voices were low, and he was tired again and couldn't concentrate well.

"Do what you are doing right now. Look at me for a change, ask, and stay to listen to my answer. That's all, but he doesn't seem to have the guts. Yet."

"You could simply tell him now, when he cannot run away."

"No, I won't. It is tempting, but I won't press myself on him. I've got a bit of pride left, Draco Malfoy! And besides, he could not react in any way." True, following this discussion, Severus' emotions were high, and he felt his physical bonds stronger than before. Tiring bonds, too.

"What do you think his reaction will be when he g...?" Draco asked carefully. Severus, weak as he was, wished he could concentrate on this last answer, but Ginny's voice faded in and out.

"... worst case..."

"And the best case?"

"Dunno. Maybe shag like bunnies?" Severus might have misunderstood this last one as he drifted away into a fitful sleep.

:*:*:*:

Someone poked him and called his name harshly. His skin and ears protested strongly against the assault. Severus noticed he was lying on his back when he finally awoke. It wasn't Ginevra gently calling for him; it was Draco, and he wasn't gentle either. He rolled Severus around a bit more. "Wake up, you, I haven't all day."

He unceremoniously opened one of Severus' eyes, sending a stab of pain through Severus' head. "One eye is enough. Listen now, you mule. I hope you heard us this afternoon. Or yesterday morning. You've got ample time to think about it. If you don't change your behaviour towards her, you might regret it. She is a lovely girl and deserves better."

"Draco?" Ginny's voice came from near the bathroom. "Oh, you've gone inside already? Saying good bye?" She came closer and gasped. "Draco!" she hissed, louder than any sound Severus had heard from her in days. "Look at his skin; what did you do? Why can't you be the least bit careful? Go now; just go! I've got a lot to do here now."

:*:*:*:

:*:*:*: