Have My Most Dear Dreams Come True?
Chapter 6 of 6
themistresssnapeSomething I had to get off my mind because I though life just became too good to be true.
ReviewedHave my most dear dreams come true?
Are you really here with me?
Can it be that all the heaviness and
crushing pain have vanished so fast?
I don't know what to think or feel now,
you hold me in your arms and
tell me that you love me always.
You gave her up for me and I left him too.
Now the two of use are here now, together,
with your question hanging in the air.
Everyone would say that we're too young,
too soon together to make such plans.
But I have loved you five years now,
both beside you and apart,
and my love has never failed.
So here we are, now to the end,
my answer is and has always been,
I don't want anything more...
I suppose you may have noticed a different tone to this particular piece. Well, it has been a very eventful weekend. My boyfriend and I were supposed to leave for camp to serve as counselors on Saturday, but most of the buildings on the camp burned down after what they think was an electrical short in the main transformer. That night my boyfriend and I went out to eat and we got into a terrible fight in the parking lot. He broke up with me and left me there. So I called Gerard and asked him to come pick me up. When he got out of his car I just fell into his arms and cried until I ached. Darren (my boyfriend) had said some truly hurtful things and I did love him as a friend, although I don't know how much of a chance we have for that now. Gerard brought me home and held me while I cried. He stayed the night with me and took me to church yesterday morning. I had a panic attack when I saw Darren and ran out of the building screaming and crying. Gerard followed me outside and worked me through the attack. Then he asked me to marry him, and God help me I said yes.
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Latest 25 Reviews for The Things I Can't Say Aloud
5 Reviews | 9.4/10 Average
WOOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!That is amazing! Oh, best of luck to you. Gerard sounds like your true soulmate. I know how much it hurts when other people are involved... the night I left my first husband - although I knew I was doing the absolute right thing - I went to my mom's house and cried so hard I actually got a nosebleed! But I couldn't be happier now... and I couldn't be happier for you!!!!It's impossible to go through life without getting hurt, and without hurting others. It happens... it will most likely happen with you and Gerard, too. But you won't go wrong if you follow your heart.Yay! I'm so happy! I'm off to do a lot of smiling now!~ jPS - Can I come to the wedding?
Response from themistresssnape (Author of The Things I Can't Say Aloud)
Thanks so much! We haven't set a date or anything, but we've talked about having it near his grandparents, who live in Scotland. It might happen that we don't get married until after we graduate from school. Who knows, but I do know that I'm happier than I've been in years. ~The Mistress
Oh, Mistress...I'm sure this is none of my business, but I'm going to tell you how I feel about things, and about my life.When I entered college almost 20 years ago (holy crap!) I met a wonderful guy who quickly became my best friend. My mother wanted us to be together (although we were both seeing other people at the time) but we knew that we were destined to be nothing but friends. Over the years we became a part of each other's everyday lives, and although we knew that we were perfect for each other on paper, we also knew that the feelings just weren't there. But he remained the one person that I always ran to when I needed to feel better, and I remained the one person that he could truly be himself with. 10 years ago I got married. My best friend was one of my ushers, and I had a special song dedicated to him that we danced together to. (On a side note, my irrepresive mother made remarks to my sister that HE was the one I should have married! Nice, huh??) One year later, he moved across the country.He was miserable living out there, and I was miserable without him. The high point of my day was when I would get to work each morning, because more often than not there would already be a message from him on my voice mail. He came back that Christmas to visit, and we were inseparable while he was here. I felt like I could breath again. Two months later... on my birthday... he moved back. Yay!! 
He was the only one I spoke to about the problems with my husband. He was the one who held me when I cried, and - invariably - made me laugh. In November of that year, I left my husband. Within a month, my best friend and I realized that we couldn't be without each other. This December will mark our 6th wedding anniversary.I know how hard it is to love someone when you're with someone else. I know how unfair it feels, and the guilt that goes along with it. But I am a firm believer that you don't do ANYONE any favors by staying in a relationship that is not right. Even if my best friend and I had not been falling in love, I would have left my first husband, for the simple reason that I knew that he was not the one.It is possible for your dreams to come true. It is so rare, and so beautiful... I would hate to see someone waste their chance. People may get hurt, but people do recover.I wish you the best of luck, and I hope that you get your true heart's desire.Love,Jackie
Response from themistresssnape (Author of The Things I Can't Say Aloud)
You have no idea how comforting your words are. I am on my way to post another poem it what I hope will be a much lighter collection now. Take a look at the notes on the bottom for a bit more explanation. ~The Mistress
Something about this one reminds me of a haibun. (Just in case you've never heard of that particular form, a haibun is a form of Japanese poetry; in its English form it is basically a descriptive paragraph in poetic language; it ends in a bold line that's separated from the rest of the poem which acts as a sort of summary, kind of like a photograph with a caption.)
And you're right; life's not easy. I sometimes think that we tend to overcomplicate things, though I'm not sure if it's intentional or not.
Response from themistresssnape (Author of The Things I Can't Say Aloud)
In my life, at least, things tend to overcomplicate themselves and I'm left to work out the mess. ~The Mistress
I thought that this was very touching. There's very little that I can give by way of criticism—but then, not everything has to be taken apart and analyzed. I look forward to reading more poems like this should you decide to post them.
On a personal note, I wish you luck as well; I can certainly sympathize, as I've suspected for quite some time that I've met my own soulmate though (for various reasons) there will probably never be anything between he and I but a friendship with some strange overtones.
In any case, good work. Keep it up. =)
Response from themistresssnape (Author of The Things I Can't Say Aloud)
Thank you. I just read your posting of "Three Big Fat Poems" and loved it. More people in the world need to think like you. I'm in the same boat, but I guess I've been lucky. The guys--and girls--in my life have never been anything but loving, at least the ones who mean anything to me. I've given Gerard the address to read these, I just hope I haven't set us on a path where one or four hearts are broken. Thanks for reading, and for understanding. ~The Mistress
Very lovely (pardon the pun)—and congratulations! 
Response from themistresssnape (Author of The Things I Can't Say Aloud)
Thank you so much. He's going to ask his mother for her great grandmother's engagement ring. Neither of us have the money to buy one, but I'd rather have a family ring anyway. It's surprising how easily the words came out after this happened. I guess happiness--and love--does that to you. ~The Mistress