Chapter Five
The Secret Life of Severus Snape
Chapter 6 of 8
OzRatbag2When Eileen Snape listened to the hushed warnings of her sister, Kathleen, little did she realise that her decisions regarding her son's education would affect not only him but also her only grandchild. Written for Sunny33
ReviewedChapter Five
David sat quietly at the Leaving Feast with his classmates, together and yet with a very visible divide between all of them. The intensive lessons he'd endured with the Headmaster had paid off with David's ability to exist as a student, yet operate on an entirely different level as Professor Dumbledore's eyes and ears around the school. With all the secrets David held close to his chest, he found himself almost perpetually scowling, which scared people away from him even more, not that he noticed half the time.
He'd tried everything he could to apologise to Lily for what he'd said down near the lake, but she ignored his pleas for the rest of his fifth year, and so David had given up in the end. It was all the more galling to realise he'd probably pushed Lily into James Potter's arms. It certainly seemed that way, as Potter paraded his prize in front of him regularly. To add to his perpetually foul mood, Potter had saved David's life in his sixth year. Thinking about it made David narrow his eyes and scowl at the pair of them passing by, but it was an incident he wanted to forget as soon as possible. He'd been sworn to secrecy about Lupin's unfortunate aversion to the full moon by the Headmaster. The only plus side of the Headmaster's intervention down at the lake and following Potter pulling him back from the snapping jaws of a ravenous werewolf, was that Severus was left pretty much to his own devices. People shied away from him in the corridors, convinced that whatever grudge David had on Black and Potter in particular would rub off on the other students.
The only person who seemed to gravitate to him was Lucius Malfoy and his circle of friends, who went out of their way to cultivate David as someone, 'made of the right stuff,' whatever that meant. At his coming of age in January, Lucius Malfoy had held a party for him at his family home and gifted David with a very fine set of dress robes. It was there he'd first met Lord Voldemort and been encouraged to join their group once his schooling was complete.
Albus Dumbledore's only reaction when David had passed on this information had been to clap his hands cheerfully and assure David he'd done far better than he, the Headmaster, could have hoped for. Now, sitting waiting for the feast to finish and his final escape home to Harrogate, David wondered just what had been accomplished by everyone around him by making him into someone useful. He now understood why his mum had felt he needed to hide his true self, but it didn't make any of it any easier, and the fact that he couldn't say anything just added to David's sense of isolation.
It was, however, the ultimate realisation that the Headmaster had in David, the perfect spy, someone who could be counted on to do whatever was needed to achieve his nebulous goals. David looked around the Great Hall, taking in the scenes around him for the last time, the Hufflepuff banners proudly unfurled. He didn't know if he'd ever want to come back, but that was a false wish, and David knew it. Professor Dumbledore had arranged for David to begin an apprenticeship with one of his many colleagues in the area of Potions from September. David was looking forward to it, even though he was under no illusions that it would place him forever in the Headmaster's debt, and everything that such an obligation entailed. It was the thought of ingratiating himself into Lucius Malfoy's good graces for an unspecified period of time that gave David cause to think that running away, far, far away would be infinitely more sensible.
Unfortunately, this was merely another pipe dream, and though Lord Voldemort had encouraged and flattered David with promises of untold knowledge and the ability to seek support from the brotherhood against anyone who dared taunt him any further, it was the lack of concrete information that worried David. He'd promised to think about Voldemort's offer, all the while as Dumbledore pushed him to be his eyes and ears in a far more dangerous environment than the Slytherin common room.
~*~
The one constant throughout his schooling had been Jane, even when David had thought he might like Lily Evans more. They'd grown closer as the years passed, and their friendship had changed almost without either of them realising it during the last Christmas holidays. Jane had made David very aware of just what she thought of him, and David hesitantly told Jane he felt the same way too. He just hoped he didn't cock it up with Jane as he had with Lily. He didn't think he would, but they had lots of things to talk about once David sloughed off the loathsome 'Snape' personality and face he'd been forced to assume ever since his first year. David never wanted to set foot in the terrace in Spinner's End ever again after tomorrow evening.
~*~
"Oh, David, I always knew you were different, but I just couldn't put my finger on what it was you were hiding from me."
"I had to keep quiet about it all, Jane. If they'd found out at school, Mum and Dad would have been in danger. You would have too, and I wouldn't have ever been able to forgive myself if something happened to you because of me. Then there's the Statute of Secrecy, and I literally couldn't tell you for so long, but I applied to the Ministry of Magic to get permission to tell you everything."
"So, this statute, that's why you never ever talked about school or anything like that. I thought you were trying to brush me off for the longest time."
"I would never do that, but it's all so complicated, and I've been working with Professor Dumbledore against a faction who want to control who has access to magic, who is worthy is probably the best way to put it. It's nasty work, and I wish I'd never heard of any of them. They're all batty, but this group that I've been investigating are just pure evil. I need you to know I would never be doing this if I didn't think it wasn't worthwhile keeping an eye on them. The things they brag about though... "
David shook his head as if trying to clear the mental image of the Death Eaters' version of a fun-filled Saturday night. They'd scarred him permanently with a loathsome tattoo and then made sure David understood that the only escape from their organisation was by death. He wasn't sure just how much he could keep from Jane. If they were going to make a go of the novelty of going out together, then David felt he had to try and protect Jane from the things he'd had to see and do as part of his cover.
"What exactly does a wizard do after school? It's not like you could really be satisfied working in the butcher's I suppose."
David ceased his maudlin thoughts, laughed and swung his arm around her shoulders as they sat close together looking towards the spring outside town, enjoying their picnic lunch.
"No, nothing like that. I've got an apprenticeship to do Potions. It's a bit like chemistry and gardening all in one I suppose. I start in September, about the time you'll be heading off to university actually. It seems like we're always saying goodbye to one another."
"I know. I really don't like it, David. Why can't you come to uni with me, that way we could eventually get a flat and see what happens from there."
"I can't think of anything more I'd prefer to do, but I can't. Mum was right when she said I had to be trained with my gift, and as much as I'd like to leave it all behind, I can't. Too many people are relying on me to do everything I can to undermine this group of thugs. There is only one way out for me, and that's not something I want to even think about. We're going to have to be careful, Jane. I can't do without you. I love you too much to try and live without you."
"I love you too, David, but if we do stay together, you have to trust me with everything; no more secrets. My heart can't take the thought that you'd lie to me or have another life I can't be part of."
"I don't want you to have to see what I have to do. I don't want to do what I have to do, but I will never not trust you or keep things about us from you. That other person - that Snape - he isn't me, but the lines, they're blurred."
"And Lily?" Jane asked hesitantly.
"I... I... she hates me. I hurt her, you see, and now she hates me. I had to do it, but she is no threat to you, to us. Snape loved her, loves her still, I think, but David loves you, Jane. He... I always have. I've had to try and separate both personalities, but if I ever slip up, then you'll just have to make sure I know who I am to you."
"Always, David, you can always rely on me to argue sense into you," Jane said softly as she moved to kiss David rather thoroughly.
~*~
END OF PART ONE
Author Notes: This was written for Sunnythirty3 for the recent 2012-13 SSHG Exchange, but could not be completed in time to post. The first part is complete and the second in the process of being written. If you're looking for hawt sexxors, then this isn't the story for you. There is some swearing, along with the judicious use and misuse of canon.
Many thanks to the fabulous team of Scattered Logic and Magically25 who have helped me get the story to the stage it is at currently. Without their input, I doubt this would be half as good. I am truly very, very lucky to have had their continuing help. Any remaining mistakes (yes, my comma fetish) are mine alone.
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Latest 25 Reviews for The Secret Life of Severus Snape
28 Reviews | 5.0/10 Average
omg. i could kill dumbledore. What a twat!
Interesting idea. Looking forward to reading more :)
It is going to be a very long seven years, for Severus/David.
My heart is breaking, for both Severus and Hermione.
How very kind of Dumbeldor to teach David how to split his personality, so he can be a useful tool for him.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Yes, he's the consumate manipulator. After all, who would willingly send a child to a home to grow up knowing he was regarded as something akin to excrement, and thereby forge a tool he can use...later.JKR may have wanted the last laugh against a teacher she hated, but her treatment of Harry is remarkably similar to David/Severus' - eerily so.
It's really interesting to see how he's managing his personas and it's equally disturbing as well. This dichotomy is going to be important in the course of things, yes? I love the meta of this whole concept.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you so much! :)It will be important and it's been one of the hardest things to do - separate the personas and then deliberately weave them together. How I've actually tried to do it will be more clear once the first few chapters of the second part post. This could have been a prompt that sponsored a one-shot, but why do anything easily? 
That putrid sack of crud, what "thugs" Potter and Black are the thugs, and they get off scott free .
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
~dances with joy~ I do like it when readers get a strong emotional response from my chapters, because it's exactly what I was after! :)I've always hated Sirius with a passion because he is the typical bully, self assured and able to pick the outsider quickly and efficiently. That JKR used him as a window for Harry as a close friend of his parents leaves a particularly sour taste.Dumbledore turns a blind eye to the bullying because it suits his purposes to do so. After all, who better to spy than the youth who is completely ostracised and almost invisible? Mind you, David will have the last laugh. ;)
Love the twist. I don't think I've ever hated Dumbledore more and that's saying something. You should be so very, very proud.
In my heart, I wish David had told him to go stuff it and left him to create a new pawn, but then we wouldn't have this wonderful setup for whatever else you have in store, so I will persevere.
I've always felt that Lily could and should have done much more in that scene, if she was any type of real friend. I certainly would have.
Response from arynwy (Reviewer)
I've always felt that Harry was much better friend material than his mother and I totally agree with you as to why she made the choice she did. It was a frightening time and she wasn't a social outcast like Sev, Hermione and to a lesser degree, Harry himself.
I also understand that Harry was in a position to take the risks because he had nothing to lose except his own life, which he didn't put a high value on due to his upbringing. Lily did what was easiest and most logical - what all of her peers were doing.
This is why I've always felt that Harry's group was stronger than that of the Marauders and that his generation could be the one to break the cycle of war and prejudice. Lily never would have reached out to Draco. Harry could and did.
The parallels between Harry and Sev's lives always manages to fascinate me. I tend to imagine James and Lily sitting there, forced to watch Harry live a version of Severus's and her childhood combined, seeing how he makes the difficult, but correct choices over and over again as a form of penance.
I've written a book here... going away now and looking forward to your next update. I wish you happy writing as always!
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you so much! :DIt took ages to write this chapter, just as one of the chapters in the second part is still giving me grief, but I'm so pleased it works. It really sets up the second part and gives the window to what Harry saw in the pensieve during his Occlumency lessons with Snape.Yep, I really wish he had too, but then I wouldn't have a story. ;)She could have and should have, but I tend to think Lily understood the dynamics of the world she'd been thrust into as an 11 year old. Realistically, would she have risked losing her status in Gryffindor for someone she knew had earned the ire of Sirius, James, and to a lesser extent, Remus and Pettigrew?Honestly, I don't think so, as wrong as that is. It's only when Lily snares James that her place is secure in the magical world, though for only a brief moment.She's painted as a heroine, when in reality she seems (to me from my judicious misuse of canon) far more fickle with her friendships.
My heart is just breaking for David.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you, and things will get better for him. :)
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you, and things will get better for him. :)
Loving the contrast from his school days to his holiday times. Talk about messing with his brain! :)
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Always! :) I'm a cruel author the way I torture the characters, no matte their guise. :p
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Always! :) I'm a cruel author the way I torture the characters, no matte their guise. :p
Peter is right, of course. Eileen is a fool to trust that devious old tyrant Albus Dumbledore. Safest place in Britain my eye!
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you, and you're right, Eileen has placed her trust in someone with an agenda. :)I hope you enjoy the rest of the story.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you, and you're right, Eileen has placed her trust in someone with an agenda. :)I hope you enjoy the rest of the story.
Very interesting. And I love that his dad is a Granger, of I'm sure those Grangers. Poor Severus having to deal with all this at the age of eleven. I'm inclined to agree with Peter.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! I was looking for a different slant to Severus' backstory, and the bunnies deliveredd. To deal with this at such a young age, when he's too young to understand just what his mother is asking, is pretty dark and dastedly, but I really do love the character of Peter Granger. he appeared almost fully formed. :)I think it Peter had a smidgeon of magical blood, David would have had a far more different childhood, but then I wouldn't have had a story. ;p
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! I was looking for a different slant to Severus' backstory, and the bunnies delivered. To deal with this at such a young age, when he's too young to understand just what his mother is asking, is pretty dark and dastardly, but I really do love the character of Peter Granger. he appeared almost fully formed. :)I think it Peter had a smidgeon of magical blood, David would have had a far more different childhood, but then I wouldn't have had a story. ;p
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! I was looking for a different slant to Severus' backstory, and the bunnies deliveredd. To deal with this at such a young age, when he's too young to understand just what his mother is asking, is pretty dark and dastedly, but I really do love the character of Peter Granger. he appeared almost fully formed. :)I think it Peter had a smidgeon of magical blood, David would have had a far more different childhood, but then I wouldn't have had a story. ;p
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! I was looking for a different slant to Severus' backstory, and the bunnies delivered. To deal with this at such a young age, when he's too young to understand just what his mother is asking, is pretty dark and dastardly, but I really do love the character of Peter Granger. he appeared almost fully formed. :)I think it Peter had a smidgeon of magical blood, David would have had a far more different childhood, but then I wouldn't have had a story. ;p
This is a very interesting and intruguing start. Can't wait to see where it goes from here.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you, and I hope the story continues to intrigue you! :)
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you, and I hope the story continues to intrigue you! :)
You can't just throw a Granger in there with no explanation!!! Something tells me David doesn't have such a nice time of it at Hogwarts...
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
I know, cruel of me isn't it? ;)I think your hunch may be quite accurate, but there is a silver lining in all of this. It just won't be apparent for a while. :)
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
I know, cruel of me isn't it? ;)I think your hunch may be quite accurate, but there is a silver lining in all of this. It just won't be apparent for a while. :)
Okay, you've got me hooked. Now what is going on?
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! :) Music to my ears to hear I've hooked you from the prologue. May you continue to stay hooked.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! :) Music to my ears to hear I've hooked you from the prologue. May you continue to stay hooked.
This story get more and more interesting. I'm really looking forward to the rest of the plot.And the writing is superb too!And the people! I like how Eileen is pictured as more complex and with no possibility of leaving her bad husband because she has shamed her family. It makes good sense.Looking very much forward to the next chapter.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you so much for your thoughtful review! :) I wanted to show Eileen as more complex than a battered wife. She's an individual who has her own journey, even though what she has done to D/S is questionable. No one, not even Severus is black and white.The next chapters are in the queue.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you so much for your thoughtful review! :) I wanted to show Eileen as more complex than a battered wife. She's an individual who has her own journey, even though what she has done to D/S is questionable. No one, not even Severus is black and white.The next chapters are in the queue.
Ohhh, Dumbledore promised, that's alright then what could possibly go wrong.
Granger! any relation to a future know it all, there must be, this is getting interesting.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
I know, a kindly old man with not a manipulative bone in his body. :pMaybe... :D
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
I know, a kindly old man with not a manipulative bone in his body. :pMaybe... :D
Why do I have the sneaking suspicion that Jane Jones becomes Hermione's mum?
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
I think your sneaking suspicion might be right on the money. :)
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
I think your sneaking suspicion might be right on the money. :)
mmmm 
Interesting premise, never seen this one before should be quite a ride.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! :) I believe I can safely guarantee that this going to be something very different and I owe it all to Sunnythirty3's prompt. Without it, I would never have had the bunnies doing somersaults. ;)
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! :) I believe I can safely guarantee that this going to be something very different and I owe it all to Sunnythirty3's prompt. Without it, I would never have had the bunnies doing somersaults. ;)
Interesting beginning, looking forward to more.May I assume since it is posted in Potions Under Duress that Sev and Hermione will be an 'item', so to speak?
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Hmm, yes, they'll be an 'item' but not quite in the way I think you're suspecting. The clues are all in the summary, and though it may not be regarded as SSHG in a romantic sense, it's location in Potions Under Duress is for a very good reason. :)/cryptic clues
Response from snapes_witch (Reviewer)
Oh dear, I hope my suspicions are wrong . . .
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Hmm, yes, they'll be an 'item' but not quite in the way I think you're suspecting. The clues are all in the summary, and though it may not be regarded as SSHG in a romantic sense, it's location in Potions Under Duress is for a very good reason. :)/cryptic clues
Response from snapes_witch (Reviewer)
Oh dear, I hope my suspicions are wrong . . .
Yay! *more happy dances* So pleased to see this posted here. :D
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
~hugs~I will never be able to thank you enough for the absolute gift of a prompt that fostered this story. I just hope that when I write 'The End,' you'll end up with a gift that no one in their right mind ~twitch~ would ever think of doing. :D
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
~hugs~I will never be able to thank you enough for the absolute gift of a prompt that fostered this story. I just hope that when I write 'The End,' you'll end up with a gift that no one in their right mind ~twitch~ would ever think of doing. :D
So, Severus, selectively Obliviated, renamed and relocated away from the Evanses. Hmm. I'll bite.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Umm, no, not really (sort of) but it's a good guess. :) The story is long, involved and should be clearer when the first chapter posts. I hope it entertains as I unravel canon bit by bit.
Response from arynwy (Reviewer)
Now, you've really got me sitting here wanting more.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you for such a fabulous compliment! :) Once the story is fully finished, I believe I can safely say that I think it will be the best thing I've ever written.The whole story is plotted out, the first part and part of the second part complete...and now I just need to nail the bunnies to the desk and finish it off. :p
Response from arynwy (Reviewer)
::pushes box of #3 nails along with my most comfortable hammer through the screen::
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
LOL - Hold that thought and I'm sure you'll enjoy the chapter in the second part which is making me laugh even louder. :D As for the bunnies, they appear to be co-operating currently.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Umm, no, not really (sort of) but it's a good guess. :) The story is long, involved and should be clearer when the first chapter posts. I hope it entertains as I unravel canon bit by bit.
Response from arynwy (Reviewer)
Now, you've really got me sitting here wanting more.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you for such a fabulous compliment! :) Once the story is fully finished, I believe I can safely say that I think it will be the best thing I've ever written.The whole story is plotted out, the first part and part of the second part complete...and now I just need to nail the bunnies to the desk and finish it off. :p
Response from arynwy (Reviewer)
::pushes box of #3 nails along with my most comfortable hammer through the screen::
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
LOL - Hold that thought and I'm sure you'll enjoy the chapter in the second part which is making me laugh even louder. :D As for the bunnies, they appear to be co-operating currently.
Interesting start. I'm looking forward to see where this is heading.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you and though it will be slightly different to my usual stories, I hope people enjoy what the bunnies dropped off thanks to Sunnythirty3's delicious prompt. :)
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you and though it will be slightly different to my usual stories, I hope people enjoy what the bunnies dropped off thanks to Sunnythirty3's delicious prompt. :)
About time you joined the land of the living again! *grin* Good start. Let's see some more. SOON!
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! :)Another chapter is in the queue and I'll add a further chapter to the queue this afternoon after I've had some sleep. I do nights, so it's off to the cot for me.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
Thank you! :)Another chapter is in the queue and I'll add a further chapter to the queue this afternoon after I've had some sleep. I do nights, so it's off to the cot for me.
Poor David, he is a round peg in square hole. I get the horrible feeling that manipulating old twit,{ AKA Dumbledor } has had a hand in this.
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
He is, and I wanted to show that no matter who he has to be a Hogwarts, his future is determined by that fiction. As for Dumbledore, I don't think he had a prior thought that he could 'use and abuse' David, but when the opportunity was presented to him, he grabbed it with both hands. I trust Dumbledore about as much as I trust Sirius - not that much. :)
Response from OzRatbag2 (Author of The Secret Life of Severus Snape)
He is, and I wanted to show that no matter who he has to be a Hogwarts, his future is determined by that fiction. As for Dumbledore, I don't think he had a prior thought that he could 'use and abuse' David, but when the opportunity was presented to him, he grabbed it with both hands. I trust Dumbledore about as much as I trust Sirius - not that much. :)