Thank you for reading. Humans think we don't know some of the things they do, but I'm not the only familiar with a story to tell.

Thank you for reading. Humans think we don't know some of the things they do, but I'm not the only familiar with a story to tell.

Purrrrr.

Purrrrr.

Don't let them hear you say that! They might take away my computer privileges. Then how will the other familiars have their stories told?

Don't let them hear you say that! They might take away my computer privileges. Then how will the other familiars have their stories told?

-human's place, and bashed on the door.  She's gone to prepare a snack for me, leaving me alone with an unlocked laptop!    So a human tom doesn't take a firm grip at the back of his queen's neck? How strange!  He was lucky not to get a claw-swat across the ear - queens are very excitable in such situations and may not know their own strength.  On 'Masterful', I must say - your Severus seems to have a masterful purr - and the good sense to use it.  A well-timed purrrrrr can open the doors to a great many 'tales'.  Ah!  The human is back with my snack.  I envy your voice-recognition - this keyboard is ridiculous!!  MeYowww, Prrr-mrow!  Simba.

I'm afraid you're right about the neck-grip, Simba.  Worse, I've only recently learnt that most human toms don't attempt to grip their queens' neck AT ALL! You being a tom, I'm not sure you can fully appreciate how awful that sounds to for a molly cat. Honestly! How do they expect us to remain in the mood?!?!?! Hermione-human (and the TeaOli-human, as well) assure me that some human men are able to retain their attentions by other means, but I still believe a good nip on the neck would do wonders for the quality of their mating.Thanks so much for the review! Hope your neighbour realises her duty to catkind and buys the proper software soon.

-human's place, and bashed on the door.  She's gone to prepare a snack for me, leaving me alone with an unlocked laptop!    So a human tom doesn't take a firm grip at the back of his queen's neck? How strange!  He was lucky not to get a claw-swat across the ear - queens are very excitable in such situations and may not know their own strength.  On 'Masterful', I must say - your Severus seems to have a masterful purr - and the good sense to use it.  A well-timed purrrrrr can open the doors to a great many 'tales'.  Ah!  The human is back with my snack.  I envy your voice-recognition - this keyboard is ridiculous!!  MeYowww, Prrr-mrow!  Simba.

I'm afraid you're right about the neck-grip, Simba.  Worse, I've only recently learnt that most human toms don't attempt to grip their queens' neck AT ALL! You being a tom, I'm not sure you can fully appreciate how awful that sounds to for a molly cat. Honestly! How do they expect us to remain in the mood?!?!?! Hermione-human (and the TeaOli-human, as well) assure me that some human men are able to retain their attentions by other means, but I still believe a good nip on the neck would do wonders for the quality of their mating.Thanks so much for the review! Hope your neighbour realises her duty to catkind and buys the proper software soon.

Thank you! ^*x*^

Thank you! ^*x*^

I know better now, of course, but Severus used to be better at keeping such things private. And it wasn't as if anything I learnt on the 'net was any more enlightening. And, although I wrote this to serve a purpose completely different to the one it seems to be generally accomplishing, I am starting to see the humour in it myself. I can assure you, however, that I am no longer an innocent kitten. These days I know the ways of witches and wizards... and witches and witches.... and wizards and wizards... and witches and witches and wizards... and wizards and witches and wizards... and.... Oh! Crooks is telling me I'm talking too much again. I'm sorry! But I didn't share all of that for nothing, anyway. My fellow familiars and I have loads of stories to tell, and I've just been designated out official Storyteller!

I know better now, of course, but Severus used to be better at keeping such things private. And it wasn't as if anything I learnt on the 'net was any more enlightening. And, although I wrote this to serve a purpose completely different to the one it seems to be generally accomplishing, I am starting to see the humour in it myself. I can assure you, however, that I am no longer an innocent kitten. These days I know the ways of witches and wizards... and witches and witches.... and wizards and wizards... and witches and witches and wizards... and wizards and witches and wizards... and.... Oh! Crooks is telling me I'm talking too much again. I'm sorry! But I didn't share all of that for nothing, anyway. My fellow familiars and I have loads of stories to tell, and I've just been designated out official Storyteller!

~slow-blink~

~slow-blink~

Yes, thank yous, I suppose. My Severus laughed, too. The nerve of that wizard! How was I to know humans don't know enough to bite whilst mating?

Yes, thank yous, I suppose. My Severus laughed, too. The nerve of that wizard! How was I to know humans don't know enough to bite whilst mating?

Thank you, my lady. At least some humans know a good fan fiction when they read one!

Thank you, my lady. At least some humans know a good fan fiction when they read one!

Mrriao!

Purrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Mrriao!

Purrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Hmph. I suppose it is funny, but just you wait, human! The next one will burn your whispers!

Oh, I'm sure it will!  I look forward to it! ;)

Of course, I meant "whiskers"; I'm currently stayingwith Hermione and it's hard to write without Sev's voice-recognition software.

Hmph. I suppose it is funny, but just you wait, human! The next one will burn your whispers!

Oh, I'm sure it will!  I look forward to it! ;)

Of course, I meant "whiskers"; I'm currently stayingwith Hermione and it's hard to write without Sev's voice-recognition software.